every time i open a romance book and the FMC starts doing the “im not like other girls 🥺” routine while simultaneously having 14 men pissing a circle around her to mark their “territory”, i feel my soul leave my body.
and somehow she always:
• trips over oxygen
• hates “girly girls”
• has no friends because “girls are too much drama”
• survives exclusively on air
• gets described like this: “she didn’t know she was beautiful” GIRL I KNOW YOU HAVE A MIRROR
like PLEASE. i’m begging authors to let women in books have actual flaws instead of quirks downloaded from wattpad.
this is why i love characters like Stranger Things’s Will Byers or Yoon Bum from Killing Stalking. they are deeply miserable sometimes, but never give up. they make terrible decisions. they suffer the consequenceses, but get up after. they don’t try to look attractive, they want to survive.
i’m writing a splatterpunk horror series with dark erotica elements (NOT ROMANCE) and the NUMBER ONE thing i refuse to do is create a wattpadified “she’s literally me” vacuum-sealed protagonist. if my characters do stupid things, the narrative drags them through the parking lot for it. as it should.
i want characters who are strange in ways that actually problematic.
give me MCs who are wrong, or anti-heroes.
give me characters, that you feel connected to in the most worrisome way.
give me protagonists who aren’t the chosen ones, and are miserable.
birthday party for the birthday boy o.s. + y.b. + reader
- i’ve had this in the works on again off again since 2024.
- reader/stand-in has no defining traits besides dark hair and full lips (full because of plumping gloss or genetics, your choice).
-word count: 2288
sangwoo arrives home with a store bought cake that he sets down on the table. he seems to be in a decent mood despite being upset with bum for accidentally breaking a plate the other day. his voice rings out throughout the house,
“honey, i’m home!,” his new favorite joke as of the other week. “i heard it’s a special someone’s birthday today~”
this causes bum to freeze as he’s seated in his chair at the sink. he’s always hated his birthday but maybe being able to celebrate with sangwoo wouldn’t be so bad?
bum nods along. he can’t quite remember the last time his birthday was truly celebrated, perhaps it was back when he was younger. though, he can’t help but be a teeny bit interested about where sangwoo is going with this. he’s shocked that sangwoo of all people even remembered his birthday. who’s he kidding, he probably just took a look at the boy’s wallet.
sangwoo pulls out a grocery baggie from behind his back and opens it. bum curiously looks up at him and then inside of the bag.
inside the plastic baggie lies a single party hat and a noisemaker. sangwoo puts the hat atop bum’s head and straightens it. they lock eyes for a second and hold a gaze but sangwoo snaps the string against bum’s chin. he scoffs and looks away.
“we’ll start your little party at six and your guest will find it very rude if you’re late!” he walks off towards the basement. bum watches as he leaves but doesn’t follow, his face warms a bit at the thought of sangwoo remembering his birthday and even getting him a cake! though, that’s also the sting of the party hat string setting into his chin.
he wonders if sangwoo got him a gift! although, he prays that sangwoo is just being silly and that he’ll be his special guest. he’d love for this so-called party to be just the two of them especially since he doesn’t think he could handle another outing with some of sangwoo’s friends.
after getting his skirt wet earlier in the kitchen, he hung it up to dry. this now leaves him in just a warm brown, long sleeve shirt and his underwear.
it’s about two minutes to six and bum hasn’t heard anything from sangwoo. maybe he’s guarding his birthday gift in his bedroom or something. bum quietly makes his way to the other room.
“surprise!” sangwoo yells and he blows the noisemaker from before. bum’s chest tightens. his vision blurs for a second, he wasn’t aware of just how badly he’d wanted this. that is until he notices a girl near sangwoo.
bum gulps. “w-who’s she?” he pointed at the mystery woman, already regretting the question.
a girl sits on the bed before them both, she’s blindfolded but her hands and legs are free. he thinks that she looks quite cute despite not being able to see her eyes. she had dark hair that went a bit past her shoulders, full lips that were coated with shiny lip gloss, he even liked how she smelled. the perfume that she wore was light and gave off a faint scent of vanilla. shes clearly well put-together despite being naked.
“don’t you wanna come play party games with your guest? you know it’s common courtesy to entertain your guest before opening presents.”bum looks back at him in disbelief, what was he supposed to do with a blindfolded girl?
“party games?” his face shows a look of uncertainty.
“go on,” sangwoo shoves him a bit but this causes bum to fall towards the girl. the girl’s breath hitched as she jumped at the sudden movement and bum squirms as he realizes that he’s practically fallen into her chest.
soft, she feels so soft and she just smells so sweet.
sangwoo sighs as he notices that bum won’t make a move. “you honestly can’t be this stupid, that uncle of yours must’ve fucked your head up real bad.” he pulls bum up by the back of his head and forces his lips to touch the girl’s.
he notices that the girl doesn’t reject his forced kiss, it’s as if she’s okay with what’s happening. his lips become stickier as she’s the one progressing their kiss forward.
bum is freaking out in his head but doesn’t dare pull back. he wants to make sangwoo proud of him. though somewhat passionate, the kiss is shortlived as sangwoo pulls his head back by his hair once again.
the girl remains quiet but carries a faint smile on her face.
“now, i want you to watch cause someone has to teach you.” bum moves back and sangwoo takes his place. he kisses the girl, it starts a bit slow but it turns heavy soon. he’s groping at her chest and backside while she paws at his remaining clothes.
bum notices that sangwoo slips his hand down near her thighs. just watching him do that to her makes his face heat up.
sangwoo pulls back, his lips stained with the girl’s lip gloss. bum’s breath hitches as he hastily tries to pull his shirt down over his crotch. sangwoo notices that bum quickly gets hard and motions him over.
“onto our next lesson, you’re pretty hungry, right?” bum’s eyes widen as he figures out what he means.
the girl, still blindfolded, lies down on her back. her legs are semi spread and she’s squirming around, clearly a bit stimulated from when sangwoo touched her.
bum lies down with his head between the girl’s thighs. he looks back at him with an unsure look. sangwoo gives him the go ahead and bum starts out slowly licking at the dripping liquid from before.
it’s a bit tangy, it reminds him of maybe something sweet almost? he doesn’t mind the taste so far but he’s just unsure of how he should go about moving his mouth.
bum gives a small lick to her folds which causes the girl to let out an almost surprised noise. he continues his tongue movements with her now wirthing, she’s pulling his hair in the directions that’ll get her there quicker. he’s slurping and his face is practically slipping between her thighs.
the noises she makes have reached pleasurable as he’s now brushing his hips against the bed. he starts to let out a whimper but it gets caught in his throat upon feeling a smack on the back of his thigh. he comes to a halt and turns his head to which he finds sangwoo behind him. “it’s not your turn yet, focus on her.” bum shakingly goes back to focus on the girl as he gently brushed against the blanket once more.
the girl whines below him as his tongue continues moving. sangwoo snakes his hand into bum’s underwear and leans down behind him. “keep your hat on and focus on her. if you lose focus, who knows what’ll happen?”
his breath hitches as he feels sangwoo’s hand snake into his underwear to slowly move up and down his shaft. though his hips stutter a bit, he does his best to continue to please the girl before him. unfortunately, he already finds himself getting close after just a few strokes to which he’s now panting a bit. sangwoo gently circles his fingers back and forth around the already sticky tip.
the girl below him finishes and bum practically slurps up what he can since he’s close behind her. he hazily lifts his head as sangwoo’s fingers grow stickier. “you’re going to get this right by the end of the night, bum. we can’t have you going throughout life not knowing how to please a woman, can we?”
bum’s clothes are fully off and tossed aside now.
he cages his arms on either side of the girl’s head with his palms against the bed. sangwoo maneuvers his hand underneath him so that he can easily slide the boy inside of his special party guest.
bum feels like the wind’s been knocked out of him once he’s as inside as he can be. its as if he’d somehow been swallowed whole by the girl in front of him.
bum lets his breath hitch as everything feels so warm and slippery. though he’s on the smaller side he does his best to push the lower half of his body forward, wanting to please the girl. sangwoo helps his body move back and forth a bit, with bum already whining.
sangwoo now puts himself behind the boy and spreads his ass far enough so that his hole is visible. he blows on it a few times and this causes bum to scrunch up his body, messing up his already sloppy pace inside of the girl.
bum lets out a whine as he knows what’s coming but still does his best to tend to his party guest. sangwoo presses his thumb in gently before slowly moving it in a circular gesture, just something small for now to rile up the boy. this works too well when bum lets himself go inside of the girl and she whines.
“s-sorry, ‘m sorry.” bum’s hips twitch at the sensations and he whines once more as the finger is removed. sangwoo scoffs as removes his shirt and lets his pants fall as he undoes his belt. “don’t apologize to me, apologize to your guest.” he sets his own clothes aside as he watches the sight-restricted girl claw at bum’s back as he’s shaking but still continues on. “ ‘m sorry.”
though he can’t stand to look the girl in the eye despite her blindfold, she doesn’t seem mad, should she be? her mouth is open but he can’t make out what she’s saying, it’s incomprehensible.
sangwoo slides himself inside of the older boy for a second and quickly pulls back out. bum and the girl stay in the same position now with sangwoo now in the mix behind him. he slides back into the boy and plays around with the idea of starting off slow but quickly goes against it.
he instantly lays into the bum giving him what he clearly wants.
bum feels as if he’s going to go mental due to all of the mixed feelings. the girl, still on her back before him, has her legs spread wide and her arms are wrapped around his neck as sangwoo uses his own hand on bum’s waist to guide him into the girl and out again.
she’s just so warm and tight.
the girl has her arms wrapped around bum as he does his best to steadily thrust inside of her. he feels as if he’s about to fall over but he can’t even concentrate on the different feelings. he’s inside of her, she’s clenching tightly around him. sangwoo is also thrusting inside of him and sucking on the boy’s neck.
sangwoo rolls his eyes and smacks him. he makes bum kiss the girl again. “you really suck at this, what did we talk about?” bum whines into the kiss as sangwoo’s hips cause his own to move faster. the girl can barely kiss bum back due to the increased pleasure she’s feeling. bum moving inside of her was a bit underwhelming until sangwoo put himself behind the boy to “help out”. the sheer force of sangwoo being behind bum brings a lot more pleasure to the girl than it did before.
they continue on in this pile for sometime but bum has already finished inside of the girl twice causing him to be somewhat overstimulated but not close to passing out.
sangwoo pulls out, having partially finished inside while the remainder hits bum’s face. the girl lies off to the side while she’s trying to catch her breath.
bum lunges for sangwoo’s cock, wanting to clean it off. “aht,” he moves away from bum. “you’ve got to clean her up first.”
the girl could be heard uttering a small “please~” once bum dives back in. he’s on his knees as he’s already began eating again. he does his best to shove his face deeper to fully clean her up. he’s grinding his hips into the mattress once more as he’s hit with the fact that he’s tasting everyone all in the same hole.
his tongue moves frantically as he licks all around doing his best to get as deep as he can clean her up. though what he’s currently tasting is himself and sangwoo mixed with someone’s else flavor, he’d do anything for a taste of oh sangwoo.
“no way. you’re fuckin’ sick, you really did it?”
bum looks up, he’s smiling and there’s hearts in his eyes if you look close enough. he’s a bit dazed with one eye almost glued closed due to a mix of everyone’s cum across his face.
still smiling.
once he’s all tuckered out, sangwoo walks the girl upstairs and brings back down a slice of bum’s birthday cake. atop the cake is a single pink candle that the younger man lights. “hold it, you can’t eat your cake ‘til its got the finishing touches.”
sangwoo strokes his length a few more times for the night, letting the excess dribble onto the slice of cake. “blow your candles out, birthday boy.” bum’s eyes are wide as he blows his candle and then quickly closes them to make a wish.
he lets him eat a decent bit before going to retrieve his gift.
to end the party, sangwoo brings out a gift bag that appears to be stuffed with tissue paper. after actually moving the paper, he sees a rather large stuffed frog. sangwoo rolls his eyes as bum admires the frog and gives it a big hug.
Our Lord and Savior Koogi posted for new years, basement dwellers. You better make this year as good as you can lest our God wish us a happy new years for no reason 🔪🖤🔪
I know i'm very late to the party and this fandom is basicly dead. BUT-
I noticed something while i read through chapter 55.
Where Sangwoo and his mom bury his dead father. First they buy some apples on the way. As we can see there's 4.
She makes him eat a apple, or at least take one bite out of it.
She one out of her pocket, that has cleary been eaten a bit.
And when they get home there's only 3. Wich means the apple she took out of her pocket is the same one Sangwoo bit. She left it by the body. SHE WAS LEAVING DNA, IN CASE SOMEONE FOUND THE BODY. SHE WAS GONNA FRAME SANWOO FOR HIS FATHER'S DEATH.
Idk if anybody already saw this or talked about this. But i did not know i was gonna find another reason to hate this woman.
