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Temporary Bliss(Sterek)

Sterek Bingo Theme: Music

(Inspired by the song, Temporary Bliss, by The Cab)

Derek watched as Stiles pulled his clothes on and scrambled to answer his phone. He'd already missed two calls from Scott and a third would result in a search party; Scott tended to worry.

"Hey, Scotty, I'm sorry, I left my phone on the charger and didn't know you called. I'm heading over now, I'll see you soon," Stiles lied as he quickly collected his things.

Derek watched from his bed, still naked and wrapped in the sheets.

"I'll see you later, Derek," Stiles called over his shoulder as he rushed out the door leaving Derek alone, once again.

This had become a habit for them. It had started about three weeks ago, when Derek had gotten hurt, pretty bad. Stiles insisted on staying the night at Derek's loft, to keep an eye on him. He'd been shot with a rare type of wolfsbane and almost didn't make it. Stiles was always the one to show the most concern for Derek. He saw passed Derek's hard alpha exterior and saw the lonely, broken man underneath.

Derek had truly been okay, but nobody was talking Stiles out of crashing Derek's couch for the night. When Derek had one of his nightmares, Stiles' had woken him gently and calmed him down just by simply being there. Stiles insisted on staying by Derek's side for the rest of the night. When he woke several hours later from another nightmare, Stiles hadn't woken him, instead he'd laid with the werewolf and let his touch comfort the wolf. Stiles knew that physical anchors were a powerful thing and he knew the pack was Derek's anchor and he'd used that to his advantage.

When Derek woke next to the human he felt a peace he hadn't felt in a long time. Stiles offered to stay the next night, just in case, but Derek understood that Stiles was concerned for him so he let him stay. However this time when Derek had a nightmare, he woke Stiles asking him to lie with him. That had lead to lots of physical contact and eventually the two of them sleeping together. Derek slept like the dead that night. The first time in a long time without a nightmare. After that he'd expected things to be awkward or Stiles to become clingy, however Stiles acted as if nothing happened.

The next few nights had been hell for Derek, he had horrible nightmares, and when he woke, he felt more alone than he ever had. The third night, Derek had called Stiles, desperate to hear his voice. He'd never expected Stiles to come over, but at one am, Stiles was knocking on Derek's door. That was the second time they slept together. After that, it became a thing.

Derek had been surprised by how detached Stiles kept himself, and how he managed to pretend that they weren't sleeping together whenever the pack was around. Stiles had learned how to clean Derek's scent off of him to keep the pack from suspecting anything. Something about meadow sweet being good for masking scent.

What Derek didn't expect was to fall for the human. He started to miss Stiles when he wasn't around. He started to crave his touch in non-sexual ways. He found himself become more protective of the human, and he wanted to hear about Stiles' day. Stiles, however hadn't changed at all. He didn't act any differently towards Derek or even smell different around him. It hurt Derek, he knew he needed to cut things off before he got hurt. He never imagines Stiles would hurt him, even though it was unintentional.

Derek threw the covers off of him, making his way to the shower. He stepped into the hot water, letting it wash away Stiles' touch. Derek let out a frustrated growl, he already missed Stiles. He hated feeling that way. He didn't want to love Stiles, but it was too late.

-

Derek had just sat down with a book when a familiar scent hit his nose. Stiles. Derek felt his chest tighten and excitement build as the scent grew stronger.

The knock on the door made his heart jump. He still got excited when Stiles showed up, even though he'd been expecting him.

Derek opened the door to see Stiles looking at him with those beautiful brown eyes.

"Hey," Stiles smiled.

Derek stepped aside letting Stiles in.

"Are you okay?" Stiles asked.

He must have sensed Derek's mood. Derek had been trying to get the courage to break it off with Stiles all day.

"We need to talk," Derek said gesturing to the couch.

Stiles frowned, but took a seat, "What's wrong?"

"We have to stop...this," Derek said gesturing between them.

"Oh," Stiles whispered.

Derek was sure he saw a look of disappointment cross Stiles' face for a split second.

"Right, of course," Stiles nodded, averting his eyes.

Derek felt his stomach twist. He'd been hoping for more of a fight, possibly even a confession of Stiles' love for Derek, but who was he kidding? No one would love him, he was far too broken.

"Don't think I don't enjoy it. I do, so much, but..." Derek trailed off. Why was he explaining himself? Stiles didn't care why.

"I get it, this shouldn't have happened to begin with," Stiles nodded again, still not meeting Derek's eyes.

Derek tried to pick up a scent from Stiles, but he wasn't picking anything up.

"Did I...Did I do something wrong?" Stiles asked his eyes lifting to meet Derek's. Derek saw the concern in them. Yet again Stiles was worried about Derek's well being more than his own.

"No, no, not at all, I just..." Derek trailed off. How could he possibly explain himself?

"Regret it?" Stiles asked a hint of sadness to his tone.

"Do you?" Derek found himself asking.

Stiles frowned, "I could never regret that, any of it," Stiles shook his head.

Derek's heart ached at Stiles' words.

"I wish this didn't have to end, but...I can't...you and I...we don't..." Derek once again fought for the right words.

"It's okay Der, you don't have to explain yourself. You're over it, I get it. I'm just glad I could be there for you," Stiles gave a small smile.

A lump formed in Derek's throat at the use of his nickname, Stiles only ever used it when they were being intimate.

"Is that the only reason you did it?" Derek couldn't hide the hurt in his tone, "Because you thought I needed it?" Derek wanted to be angry. Stiles had only slept with him out of pity.

"Didn't you?" Stiles asked.

"I don't need your pity, Stiles," Derek's tone broke slightly as he said the human's name.

"No, that's not..I didn't mean..." Stiles' scent spiked. Panic.

"I just wish I had been enough," Stiles sighed dropping his head.

"What do you mean?" Derek frowned down at Stiles.

"Nothing, it doesn't matter,' Stiles smiled at Derek, but the smile didn't reach his eyes.

"Stiles, you were more than enough, I just...you..."Derek felt his frustration build, "You're messing with my head. It's not worth the temporary bliss," Derek huffed out.

Stiles tilted his head slightly, "Messing with your...Derek, what are you talking about?"

"I don't know how we got here, I mean I do, but...I thought..." Derek ran a frustrated hand through his hair, "Every morning, I wake up and you're...gone, or leaving. I can't stand it. I hate watching you leave. I hate you coming over and not smelling like me, even though we spent all night together, I can't keep doing this. I know that I'm going to regret this, but I love you Stiles and you don't feel the same way, and I didn't expect this to happen, but now it hurts. It hurts worse than before I had you," Derek's voice broke and his tone dropped into a sad whisper.

Stiles sat frozen in place.

Derek wanted to force Stiles to leave, but he feared he'd never see him again. Stiles had a bad habit of pushing people away, much like Derek.

"Der," Stiles' tone was full of guilt.

"Don't," Derek practically growled.

"But-"

"Stiles, please, there's nothing to say," Derek snapped. He really needed to make Stiles leave, before he had a total break down that only Stiles' had ever been able to pull him out of.

"Derek," Stiles spoke in a demanding tone as he stood.

Derek looked at Stiles. Stiles rarely used that tone with him, that was a tone reserved for when Scott was being stupid or when Liam was making him mad.

"I'm sorry I made things harder, I only wanted to make you happy, I was afraid of being too clingy so I tried to keep my distance, but I love you too. I realized it the second night, I stayed. I wouldn't have been doing this if I didn't. I always knew I cared about you, but that night really solidified the feelings. I just thought you needed a release, I never imagined you'd actually..." Stiles trailed off unable to even say the words.

"Love you?" Derek took a step towards the human.

"You really do?" Stiles asked, still unsure.

"I do," Derek reached for Stiles' waist, pulling him up against his chest.

Stiles' tongue ran across his bottom lip as if often did when he was nervous.

"Why didn't you say anything? Stiles frowned.

"I was sure you didn't feel the same way. You never smelled like..." Derek trailed off this time.

"Meadow sweet, it's not just undetectable to werewolves, it masks most chemosignals. I wasn't just using it to mask your scent so the pack didn't know, I was masking my feelings so you wouldn't know how I really felt. I couldn't risk you finding out and pushing me away," Stiles explained.

"Why do you think I would have pushed you away?" Derek frowned running his thumb along Stiles' jaw.

"Really? I could barely believe you would even sleep with me, much less have any kind of romantic feelings. I mean you're Derek Hale and I'm..." Stiles shrugged.

"Fucking amazing?" Derek growled leaning into Stiles.

A blush filled Stiles' cheeks.

Derek closed the remaining gap between them.

Stiles melted into the kiss.

Derek pulled Stiles towards the bedroom, now that he could let his feelings show through, he planned to show Stiles just how much he loved him.

Consider buying me a coffee, I would really appreciate it!

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