#shantmissions

[incorrectshantaequotes]

Shantae, running through Scuttle Town: I can't let Risky hurt Mayor Scuttlebutt!

[Shantae then slows down considerably as she looks up in thought]

Shantae: Then again...

Shantae, resuming her previous pace: Nah, nah, I'd better stop her.

(submitted by @caddeter, whose submission also broke my post editor for reasons I don't understand so uh. here!)

[incorrectshantaequotes]

I love when the quotes are Skylo related it makes me jump up and down and clap and cheer and say "yippee!" 💜💙

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Very pleasant surprise to wake up to some fanart! Everyone say thank you to @volcanolotus for the fanart this is really good

[incorrectshantaequotes]

Shantae: Rotty, no!

Rottytops: What?

Shantae: Sorry, force of habit. Sky, no!

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Vinegar, arriving with a comically small towel: Is this towel good, boss?

Ammo Baron, covering himself with the shower curtain: What am I supposed to cover with that? Are you making fun of me!?

[incorrectshantaequotes]

Ammo Baron, throwing a white cloth: You might want to borrow this.

Shantae: Ew, no one wants your dirty underwear.

Ammo Baron: It’s not dirty underwear!  It’s a white flag, and you may as well start waving it right now.

Sky: THE ONLY THING I WILL BE WAVING IS YOUR DECAPITATED HEAD ON A STICK IN FRONT OF YOUR WEEPING MOTHER!

[Everyone stares in silence]

Ammo Baron: ...Good lord.

[incorrectshantaequotes]

Officer Risky Suprise Inspection

Shantae: Alright, time to do some shopping.  Maybe I can buy something special?  Let me just check my-

[Risky, dressed in a police officer uniform, throws open the door]

“Officer” Risky: HOLD IT RIGHT THERE, CRIMINAL SCUM!

Shantae: …You have got to be kidding me.

“Officer” Risky: That’s right, runt! I’m on the side of justice as a police officer.

Shantae: Now this is an outfit I don’t think you belong in.

“Officer” Risky: What do you mean? What about that time I wore Mayor Scuttlebutt’s attire?

[There’s a brief flashback to Risky struggling with the oversized clothing]

Shantae: My point still stands.

“Officer” Risky: Bah, whatever!  I sure hope you’re ready for a SURPRISE INSPECTION CHECK.

Shantae, internally: Why is this my life?

“Officer” Risky: You better not be holding anything dangerous, or I’m gonna have to DETAIN YOU.  But you wouldn’t be holding any weapons now, right Shantae?

Shantae: Can we just get this over with? I have to buy food for dinner.

“Officer” Risky: Alright, but like I said, you better not be holding onto anything dangerous.

[Risky chuckles, but as she pats down Shantae, she starts grunting in confusion]

“Officer” Risky: What-what the-what the hell!? You’re actually clean!?

Shantae: Well yeah, I had to sell off all my sub-weapons to pay for food.  I wouldn’t have to do that if Mayor Scuttlebutt would stop refusing to pay me, which is illegal.  Maybe you should do something about that, Officer Risky.

“Officer” Risky: Hmph! Don’t get cute, runt. I’ll find a reason to bust you.

[One pat down later…]

“Officer” Risky: Aha, look at this! You’re carrying…oranges…that’s not really dangerous.

[Another pat down…]

“Officer” Risky: Oh yeah, see this? We’ve got…a bento box.

[Yet another pat down…]

“Officer” Risky: You have, uh…you have a potion on you.  I…suppose that might be a weapon. Have you tried smashing it on someone’s head? At all?

Shantae: No.

“Officer” Risky: …FUCK YOU, FIGHT ME!

[Risky screams in terror as Shantae suplexes her]

[incorrectshantaequotes]

Ammo Baron: Can’t a guy test out a deadly super weapon on a town of innocent civilians without being interrupted? WHAT’S THIS WORLD COMING TO!?

[incorrectshantaequotes]

This is not a quote I just remembered the reversal au existed hiii

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OH I LOVE THIS FANART. everyone look at this