Apr 9, 2025
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"If you can't run, you crawl. And when you can't crawl, you find someone to carry you" - Firefly 1.12
I just got struck with an idea for a Firefly fic that I might actually try and write and now you all need to hear about it too:
Someone (probably Jayne) realizes that if River is a reader, she can get secrets out of peoples heads, or at least figure out what they want and scam them. After a lot of time convincing Simon, the crew preps River and then brings her out into town the next time they land. She identifies someone who wants something that the crew knows a way to get. River calls out the person's name (the person never told her their name) and tells them that she knows how to get the thing they want. The crew goes on a wacky trip to get the thing the person wanted, and then way upsells it, making a lot of money on a simple job.
This repeats making the crew a good amount of money, and after a while River gets threatened by a guy who wants to know how she got into his head. Zoe and Shepard Book (separately and then together) try to teach River to shoot and fight hand-to-hand, not realizing that she Very Much knows how to already.
Meanwhile, River has started targeting Alliance people in these scams. The others don't exactly pick up on it. Mal thinks it's great that they're scamming minor Alliance officials out of some money, but Simon and Kaylee start to wonder if there's more to this than River's letting on.
It turns out, there is. She knows something, that's why the Hands of Blue want her back, but she doesn't know what it means. There's only one way to figure that out. And that's to go back to the Academy.
River draws more and more attention to herself, and eventually the Hands of Blue are following the Serenity from planet to planet. I think it'd be funny if everyone is separately trying to figure out how to ask River what's going on without antagonizing her and then Jayne busts in with a gun and goes "hey why are you trying to get us all arrested?" River comes clean, and tells them that this was all practice for One Last Scam: for her to let herself get captured, so that she can be taken to the Academy where she can learn about her powers, the secret she learned, and possibly how to keep her perception of things more in line with reality.
Call that part 1. Part 2 would be a TV-continuity version of the movie plotline, where only River and Mal can prove that the Alliance is responsible for creating the Reavers
It has always bothered me that they never made a full set of firefly funko pops so obviously I had to make my own.
April 4 2024, Discovery's final season begins
Is there anyone out there in the Firefly (2002) fandom who is interested in seeing gifs? I have drafted a bunch of gif sets but I don’t want to post them unless there’s interest:)
No one will convince me this is NOT the best tv series ever 😤
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