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Puppy love - osaki shotaro

sooo...i'm finally done with this piece for @tenderfrailty's nuevo comienzo collab! i'm so thankful to every other writer who helped me while i had writer's block to get ideas rolling. thank you to all my followers for supporting my writing on tumblr, i'm so grateful! also, big thank you to @mintkims for helping me make the banner! appreciate it so much!! i hope you'll enjoy this fic, it's quite long (sorry about that). do leave comments if you can! i would really appreciate the feedback!

pairing: osaki shotaro x reader

genres: fluff, romance, slowburn ; childhood friends to lovers, highschool au, animal shelter au

synopsis: as the school year drags on, you find yourself developing new feelings for your childhood best friend, Shotaro. Meanwhile, he goes through a breakup, and while recovering from the fresh heartbreak, he's trying to decide if he should start a new chapter of his life by finding someone new or staying single. while you're both figuring out the confusing feelings in your hearts, school responsibilities pile up. However, the both of you realise your feelings for each other through persevering through school together, volunteering at the animal shelter, a kinda annoying bunch of friends, and two very special dogs.

Word count: 17.6k (this was supposed to be 16k at most…bye)

Warnings: descriptions of toxic relationships, anxiety attacks, mentions of food, kinda mention of a gun?

a/n: this fic starts in about July 2021, and progresses chronologically until January 1st, 2022. (it’s long overdue…sorry about that y’all.)

»»————-----------------------　♡　-----------------------————-««

"Jeez, i'm already sick of school," you whine, dragging your feet that feel heavy as lead behind Shotaro as the both of you walk to the multi-purpose hall, where the weekly student council meeting would be held. "It's only been half a year, but there's so much to do. Student council, band, schoolwork, tuition...the list goes on!" You finish with a sigh of resignation as you walk into the room.

Shotaro chuckles softly after hearing your complaints, but you can tell he's exhausted too, from the dark circles around his eyes, resembling a panda. He has about the same hectic schedules as you, after all. "So am I," he admits while pulling out chairs for both of you. "But we've got each other to go through this together, and that makes it easier," he adds, his characteristic eye smile gracing his features.

You look up at your best friend, and seeing his smile is enough to boost your mood. "Yeah," you say, sitting down and waiting for the meeting to start. "That's not so bad". He then flashes you a wider grin as he turns back to the front.

There was one thing you'd always envied about Shotaro: even if he's not feeling good, he always finds a reason to smile. You'd been best friends with him since childhood, but his personality has never changed; shy and bashful, but optimistic and compassionate to everyone. You liked that about him, it was what made him so precious. Even now, as you're thinking about it, you feel a flutter arise in your heart.

Wait what? What is this feeling? You think to yourself. You tried your best to push the feelings aside as you knew that you guys were just friends. Besides, he already had a girlfriend. It shouldn't be a surprise, with a personality as lovable as his, any girl would fall for him.

Kim Miyoung. Pretty, smart and popular, she was the one every boy in school pined for. Some would follow her around with heart eyes (disgusting, I know). Others dropped small gifts and notes in her locker, hoping to win her heart. Yet, in the end, she fell head over heels for your closest friend, out of every other boy she could have chosen. You remembered when Shotaro first brought you to meet her, he'd introduced you to her as "my best friend". To many people, this was a bombshell as they'd always thought that you and Shotaro would date, if you guys weren't already dating. Yes, that's how close you both were.

As you remember that, a fresh pang of jealousy and sadness comes out of nowhere and stings at your heart, causing you to let out a sigh involuntarily. He's just my friend, so why am I jealous?

You feel someone poking your shoulder. "Y/n? you alright?" Shotaro's soft whisper sounds next to you. Turning, you see him looking at you, worry apparent in his eyes. "I don't think you've sighed this much in one morning before".

You snap out of your daze and put on another smile. "Yeah, I'm fine...just more tired than usual," you half-fib. It was kind of true, after all.

Shotaro nods understandingly, pulls out two sweets from his pocket, and passes one to you. It was the exact brand and flavour that you liked. He always kept some in his pocket specially for you, in case you were in need of a mood boost. That was just one of many habits he had that you found endearing. "Eat this before Mrs Jeong comes in," he mouths as he unwraps his sweet and pops it in his mouth. You do likewise and stuff the wrapper in your pocket just as Mrs Jeong walks in. The councillors stand up, bow, and greet her. She gives us a brief nod in return.

The council president, Taeyong, steps up, along with the council vice-presidents, Kun and Doyoung. "The meeting will please come to order," he declares, and Kun begins to take everyone's attendance. Just like that, another boring council meeting has started.

»»————------------------------　♡　-----------------------————-««

"Hey, congrats Taro!" You heartily congratulate Shotaro after the meeting ends, referring to him by the nickname you'd given him since you were kids. The new members of the student council executive committee had been announced at the meeting, and Shotaro was one of them, which meant he would be running for the position of council president along with four other people.

He beams back at you, returning the high-five. "Thanks," he says. "I'll do my best to serve in whatever role I'm given. I wish you were chosen too though".

You dismiss him with a wave of your hand. "Heck, I'm grateful that I wasn't selected! No extra responsibilities for me," you reason with him.

"Good point," Shotaro muses with a small laugh as you both stroll into the classroom. "Less responsibility, more time for other things".

You take your seats at the assigned desks. "My place or yours later?" you ask as you get your stationery out. Every day after school, you would go to each other's house to study and do homework, and just hang out and chill when you were done. It had been a custom for the both of you since elementary school, unless one of you had after school activities. On weekends, the others from your friend group would join. Sometimes, you'd even have sleepovers with them, which always resulted in lots of laughs together.

"Mine's open," Shotaro replies as you continue digging for your worksheets in your file. As soon as you find your homework, Mr Moon arrives, and greets the class before beginning lessons.

"Before I start, I want to announce this to the class," Mr Moon said, flashing a notice onto the projector. "The school has started a new initiative to give students the opportunity to lend a helping hand to others. In two weeks' time, everyone will have to begin doing volunteer service".

Audible groans fill the classroom. "I understand that you all already have a lot on your plates, but try to take this seriously, okay?" Mr Moon continues, attempting to empathise with the class. "Take this as an opportunity to practice compassion. Also, the more volunteer hours you serve, the more points you'll have when the hours get converted to points. The points will show up on your portfolio, and they will come in useful when you apply to other schools in the future, or when applying for a job. I encourage you all to find a few friends to volunteer with for causes you're passionate about, that will make it more enjoyable. Remember, a few hours of volunteer work on your part could mean so much to the beneficiaries," Mr Moon concludes. "Okay, now that's out of the way, let's get to the lesson. Today we will learn about..." however, you're barely paying attention. Instead, your mind is wandering, thinking of places to volunteer at. That is, until Shotaro kindly brings you back to the real world, forcing you to focus.

»»————-----------------------　♡　-----------------------————-««

"Do you want to volunteer together?" you ask Shotaro as you're waiting for your orders to be finished. You're both at Starbucks after school, ordering coffee to fuel your study session later. Year-end exams are happening in a few months, and you both cannot afford to fall asleep while studying.

"Of course! Miyoung will be volunteering with her friends anyway". He answers. At that moment, the barista calls your names, and you go to collect your orders. Meanwhile, for some reason, you're secretly celebrating that Miyoung won't be volunteering with him.

Shuffling out of Starbucks, Shotaro sips his coffee thoughtfully. "Is there any particular cause you have in mind?" he asks.

Tilting your head to the side, you give it some thought. "Not really," you admit. "I'd be happy to volunteer anywhere".

Shotaro falls silent for a while, and you swear you can hear the gears in his brain beginning to turn. Suddenly, his eyes light up. "I know! What about the animal shelter?" he proposes, turning to you, eyes wide with excitement. He knew that you both liked animals, and that animal welfare was something you're both passionate about. After all, he'd adopted a dog from the shelter before, and you'd rescued a cat from the streets before.

"Sure, let's go!"

The both of you skip to the shelter together like children, ignoring the stares from strangers. You'd done so many crazy things together throughout your friendship, this was nothing new.

When you reach the animal shelter, Shotaro pushes you in front. Knowing this is your cue to step up, you walk up to the counter. Realising that no one is there, you ring the bell. "Coming!" a male voice answers, and seconds later a boy with the thickest eyebrows you've seen rushes out. "Hi, how can I help?" he enquires with a friendly smile, and your eyes land on his nametag: Xiao Dejun.

"Hello, we would like to volunteer at this shelter," you say as politely as you can, gesturing to Shotaro.

"We'll be able to do so weekly, every Saturday morning". Shotaro finishes for you.

"Oh! That's fantastic, we really do need more volunteers," Dejun replies, clearly thrilled at the prospect of having new members onboard the team. "How old are you guys?" he questions further.

"We're 17," you respond.

"Okay that's great! You're old enough to volunteer," Dejun confirms with you as he gets out two application forms and a pen, and hands them to us. "You just have to fill this up, and you're good to go!"

As soon as you're both done scribbling your details on the form, you pass them back to Dejun, who briefly scans them and nods approvingly. "Great! I'll just have to get this approved by the shelter owner, and if all goes well, you guys can start this Saturday!"

Thanking Dejun, you both leave the shelter and proceed to Shotaro's house. "This Saturday! I can't wait," you squeal excitedly, thinking of all the adorable animals you'd get to work with.

"I know right! It's gonna be such fun!" Shotaro responds with equal enthusiasm, looking forward to the experience as well.

The two of you continue to banter on the way to his house. Upon arrival, you greet his mum and siblings and make your way upstairs to his room.

"Do you both want lunch?" His mum knocks the door, enters, and asks the both of you. You'd been coming over so often, his family was used to it already. His mum would even cook lunch for you whenever you came.

"Yes, please," Shotaro answers. "For both of us". She nods and leaves as Shotaro tells her "thanks".

"What are you gonna start on first?" You ask him, taking out your stationery and books.

"I'll start with Mathematics first. Get the hardest subject over and done with," he makes up his mind after a few seconds of thinking.

"Okay, I'll do that too then. We can help each other out," you add as he nods.

A few hours pass, and you look up to see Shotaro on his phone, typing busily on his phone, a small smile on his face. "Is it Miyoung?" You ask, and he nods, still typing. Usually, when you asked him questions about his girlfriend you would genuinely smile together with him, satisfied that he is happy with the girl he is with now. But today, your smile felt slightly manufactured, and mixed with the feelings of joy was a hint of sourness.

"Yep, it is," he replies, fingers still furiously working their way across the screen. "She's asked me on a date tomorrow," he explains.

"That's nice," you respond as the sour feeling seeps through your heart, further contaminating the joy that it now holds. "Where are you guys going?"

"We'll be at the park near school, having a picnic". He answers your question, then puts down his phone, with the same smile on his face. "I can't wait. It's been a while since we've been on a date together, so I'm glad we finally get to have one again".

"Didn't you ask her out many times previously?" you raise an eyebrow, finding it suspicious. She'd never rejected his invitations to go on dates, and if she had something on she'd always do her best to get it rescheduled, whether by hook or by crook.

"She said she was busy. I didn't want to bother her, so I told her to contact me when she's free," he says.

"I see," you hum, wanting to dismiss it as just that. Yet, for some reason, you can't seem to silence the alarm bells going off in your head. Shaking your head to try to ignore them, you look down at your assignment again, trying to get back to work.

However, you didn't realise that his smile was just the slightest bit forced as well, with a tinge of uneasiness in it.

»»————-----------------------　♡　-----------------------————-««

Saturday finally arrives, and it's time for you and Shotaro's first day of volunteer work, following Dejun's message to you both saying that your applications had been accepted. You'd agreed to meet Shotaro at his house at 7: 45 AM and head to the shelter together. Bounding up the steps, you press the doorbell and wait for him to open the door. "Coming!" Sure enough, you hear his voice from inside the house, and the thumping of footsteps. Following a "bye" to his parents and siblings, he opens up the door and greets you with his usual cheery tone, and you both are ready to set off.

There's a spring in both of your steps, instead of the usual tired dragging of feet. "I hope we'll get to play with them!" Shotaro gushes excitedly.

"I hope we'll get to walk the dogs!" you chime in, your own exhilaration taking over you as you continue down the path faster.

Upon arrival, Dejun is already waiting for the both of you at the counter. "Hi! Shotaro and y/n, correct?" You both nod eagerly. "Nice! I'm Xiao Dejun, but you can call me Xiaojun". He introduces himself. "I'll give you a tour of the shelter, brief you on your responsibilities for today, and you'll be good to go. Before that, do change into this". He tosses two volunteer T-shirts to both of you, and directs you to the washrooms to change.

When you both are done, Xiaojun gives you your volunteer badges before leading you both on a tour of the shelter. After that, he gives instructions on your different duties, such as how much food to give, how to clean the animals' living areas and how to properly handle the animals. "I think our first duty is to walk dogs together," he informs you both. "Let's get the leashes, and then we can go!"

With that, you all locate the storeroom and get the leashes, and then make your way over to the "Dog Dorm" to get the dogs. You successfully clip the leashes to every dog's collar, except for one, a shy Maltese, whose dog tag reads "Cloud". "Cloud, hey, over here". You try to coax the dog over again, but it walks forward a few steps, and then shies away again, whining.

A bark rings through the enclosed space. Turning, you see that a Samoyed puppy Shotaro is holding is gazing at Cloud with its boba eyes, tongue hanging out of its mouth. It barks again, as if beckoning her over. The Maltese trots to the Samoyed and nuzzles against him. "Hey Cloud, come here," Xiaojun calls softly. You turn around, and see him gesturing to the dog, treats in hand. She slowly goes over to him and eats the treats gently. "She's quite shy. She needs time to get used to strangers," Xiaojun explains. "She was like this with me at first too. But you should be able to bond with her after some time, pets and lots of treats. She's actually really sweet," a fond smile makes its way onto his face as he ruffles her fur affectionately. "Let's go!"

Xiaojun strikes up a conversation with both of you, and you all get to know each other better. You find out that he's in his final year at high school, wants to study veterinary medicine after graduation, and that his mum owns the shelter, and has a degree in veterinary medicine. Meanwhile, he found out that you wanted to study (insert course), while Shotaro wished to study to become a dance teacher, and he encouraged you both to work towards your dreams as well.

You get back to the shelter after the 1-hour walk, and get the dogs back into their enclosures. "Will you both be able to handle the dogs' baths yourselves?" he asks, ensuring that you both would be okay with the next task. "I'd stay and help, but another volunteer needs assistance with an injured rabbit".

"We'll be fine," Shotaro replies, and gives a thumbs-up sign. "We should be able to handle this".

"Okay, if you need anything, just text or call me, okay?" Xiaojun instructs, and then rushes off in the direction of the Rabbit Run.

Heading into the storeroom, you both get out a tub, the dog shampoos and volunteer smocks (because you both know most dogs shake the water out of their fur like there's no tomorrow after a bath and you'd rather not be drenched), and bring the stuff out into the backyard, then connect the hose to a tap nearby. You both work like a factory line, with Shotaro shampooing the dogs' fur while you dry them off, you get the dogs clean faster than you expected. All except Cloud.

"What do we do?" you sigh exasperatedly, looking to Shotaro for help since he's more experienced with dogs. "I can't coax her over".

Shotaro brings out a few treats, and slowly approaches her the way Xiaojun did. "Hey," he softly calls, stopping a few feet away from her and holding out the treats. She cautiously trots to him, sniffs at the treats in his hand, and gently nibbles at them. He lets her sniff him a bit more before petting her. "Good girl," he whispers to her.

You gawk at him. "Are you some dog whisperer or something?" you ask incredulously, blown away by his ability to get Cloud to approach him. "Because I swear, I don't know what magic you use to get Cloud to come to you so easily". You'd tried tempting her with treats earlier, but that failed.

"I'm just better with dogs than you," he jokingly brags as he settles Cloud into the bathtub and begins to shampoo her fur gently.

"Tsk, showoff," you scoff.

His only response is to laugh, which you've grown to find music to your ears as you find it adorable. He's so cute when he laughs, a thought enters your head, slowly causing a smile to spread across your face.

Focus on the dog! A voice in your head chides you as Shotaro hands Cloud to you. You look down and pretend to busy yourself with drying her off, hoping that he doesn't pick up on your flustered state. But you don't realise that he quickly busies himself with packing up the cleaning supplies to avoid you seeing his pink-tinted cheeks.

"These might be useful". He taps your shoulder, takes some dog treats out of his pocket and hands them to you. Sure enough, they come in handy as you distract her with the treats while towel drying her fur. You're actually glad that she's more docile and tame than the other dogs, or else you would be having a very hard time right now. And although you didn't mention it, you were really glad that you had Shotaro to help you - maybe more than just glad.

Finishing the cleanup, you check your phones, referring to Xiaojun's message to see what else is left for both of you. Your next task is to refill all the animals' food bowls and water bottles. Simple yet time consuming, considering the number of animals that were living in the shelter.

"Xiaojun's in the training area," Shotaro tells you as soon you're finished feeding the animals. "He says we can head over and observe the training sessions".

Both of you sprint to the training area, where Xiaojun is giving commands to the Samoyed Shotaro was walking earlier. "He looks like Jeno," Shotaro points out, making you laugh as you begin to see the uncanny resemblance between the dog and your mutual friend. You snap a picture of the dog, reminding yourself to send it to the group chat and tease Jeno later.

"Very good!" Xiaojun compliments the puppy, giving it a treat and scratching it behind the ears. The pup gives a happy bark, panting excitedly with his tongue hanging out of his mouth, and the sight is enough to make everyone's hearts melt. Xiaojun then looks up, beckoning you both over. He hands Shotaro a clicker, and gives you a bag of dog treats. "This is Jake. He's a five month old Samoyed," Xiaojun explains. "You can try giving him a few simple commands, like 'sit', 'stay'...you know, the usual. If he does the tricks correctly, you press on the clicker and then give him a treat. If not, repeat the command and see if he does it right," he instructs. "Give it a try! Jake's very friendly," he grins.

"You can go first," Shotaro passes you the clicker.

"No, you go first," you say and push the clicker back into his hand. "I'd like to see you demonstrate first before I try," you reason. "Who was bragging about being better with dogs earlier?" You take the chance to tease him, and he groans.

"Alright, alright," Shotaro concedes and takes the clicker. "N-no need to remind me".

Was that a light blush you saw on his cheeks?

And was that a stutter?

You dismiss the fleeting thought, watching as he proceeds to give Jake all sorts of simple commands, which he has no problem following. "Your turn," he says, passing you the clicker and treats.

You take the items from Shotaro and get ready to train the pup. "Jake, sit". Jake immediately gets into a sitting position. "Roll over". He drops to the floor and rolls over. As you give him more commands, he obediently follows them all, and you realise how well-trained the Samoyed puppy is. "Good boy!" you compliment Jake wholeheartedly, patting him on the head.

Xiaojun smiles at the sight. As you're about to go through another round of commands with Jake, a whine sounds from not far away. Turning, you see Cloud run over to Jake, who barks excitedly upon seeing Cloud. She nuzzles up next to him as he sniffs her all over. "Oh yes, I'll have to train Cloud; she needs more specialised training so I'll have to spend more time with her. Have fun training Jake!" he waves and gestures to Cloud to come with him. "Remember to check out when you leave". You say goodbye to Xiaojun and continue playing with Jake, until it's time for both of you to leave.

On the way home, you both continue making small talk with each other until you're at Shotaro's doorstep. "Wanna come over later?" he asks you. "Miyoung cancelled our date plans. I can ask the other guys to come as well".

You frown. "This is like the millionth time she's cancelled a date with you. What's up?" you question, feeling like something was up.

Shotaro shrugs in response. "She said she's busy again".

"What's she so busy with?" you press for answers.

"I'm not sure," Shotaro replies. "But I don't blame her, we're all getting busier anyway," he adds, and you know that he's got a valid point.

"Alright then. I'll go home, freshen up, and then come over," you say.

"Okay! See you guys later," Shotaro waves to you with a bright smile, opening his door and stepping in.

He's so cute and pure, you think to yourself. Miyoung better be treating him right. At the same time, a dull ache in your heart makes itself known, and you can't seem to shake it off.

»»————-----------------------　♡　-----------------------————-««

"So, we'll all be part of the band committee together!" Donghyuck exclaims excitedly, putting his drumsticks into his bag and hurrying out of the band room with you and Renjun as soon as you've all finished tidying up the band room. "I can't wait to start!"

Both of you laugh at Donghyuck's enthusiasm. "Me too," Renjun admits, packing his euphonium into its case. "I think we'll make a great team!"

"We do have really good chemistry, after all," you chuckle in agreement with them, slinging the flute case around your shoulder. You were merely feigning excitement; in reality you wished that you did not have to take on this role. So much for not having extra responsibilities! At least you were given the least stressful role, the Band Major Admin (BMA). Poor Renjun got the most stressful role, Band Major Music (BMM). He would have to know music better than all his bandmates and serve as the main communication channel between the band and the conductors. Donghyuck would be Drum Major (DM), in charge of the band's welfare and discipline (to be honest, neither you nor Renjun can visualise him keeping the band under control).

"That's why our ensemble performances together are always outstanding!" Donghyuck adds. "We're the best team! With us leading, NCIT Band will never fail!"

You and Renjun continue to laugh at the pumped-up Donghyuck. Once out of school, all of you turn on your phones. Renjun and Donghyuck immediately begin celebrating in the groupchat you have with Jaemin, Jeno, Yangyang and Shotaro. In order for them to not be suspicious of you, you leave a few celebratory messages of your own in the group chat as well. Sighing, you exit the group chat and private message Shotaro.

You: shotaro

You: i really don't want this role 〒_〒

Shotaro: why though? it's a good thing!

You: i didn't want extra responsibilities and stress remember

You: now here I am with this stupid role

You: at least renjun and donghyuck can suffer with me

Shotaro: hahaha yeah, i saw you guys celebrating in the group chat

Shotaro: you celebrated too cuz you didn't want them to suspect that you were stressed over the role amirite

You: omg you know me too well

Shotaro: ofc i've known you since we were literal babies pls

Shotaro: but anyway always remember that you've got ppl to fall back on in times when you're troubled or stressed

Shotaro: myself included ^-^

Shotaro: and since renjun and donghyuck are leading with you, i'm sure they'll be willing to support you too!

Shotaro: and i'll do my best to help you out too <3

You: thanks bro <3

You look at the text conversation, smiling to yourself. Why is he so cute? You begin screaming mentally as your heart rate increases to about 160 beats per minute.

"Hey! Earth to y/n!" Haechan waves his hand in front of your face as you're jerked back to reality.

"What?" you snap. "Oops, sorry, I didn't mean to snap," you quickly put your hands over your mouth and apologize. "I was startled".

Donghyuck rolls his eyes. "You and Shotaro must have been flirting with each other again," he clucks disapprovingly and shakes his head. "Anyway, wanna get bubble tea with us? We're heading to the shop nearby".

"I was NOT flirting with him! He has a girlfriend," you raise your voice defensively at Donghyuck. "I was just texting him. We're just friends. And yes, let's go".

We're just friends, the words echo in your mind painfully, as if mocking you and reminding you that that was all that you and Shotaro would be.

»»————-----------------------　♡　-----------------------————-««

Back at the shelter, you and Shotaro have finished with your duties, and you're sitting in the yard, playing with the dogs again. You'd met many animals, all lovable in their own ways, but two particular dogs found themselves a special place in you and Shotaro's hearts: Jake and Cloud. Not only were their individual personalities adorable, their friendship together was something you found precious as well.

You're watching them play in the backyard after volunteer duties are over, as Jake tackles Cloud to the ground. Cloud growls back playfully, trying to get back up and fight back against Jake. The sight reminds you of how you and Shotaro would play fight (with boundaries of course) at times, putting a smile on your face.

"You know, Jake reminds me a lot of you". Shotaro states out of the blue.

"And why would that be?" you query, genuinely curious as to why Shotaro thought that way.

"You're both naturally very outgoing, and enjoy the company of people," he says as both dogs come over to you both, with Jake gravitating towards Shotaro and Cloud to you. "Not only that, you're both very sweet," he finishes, lovingly patting Jake on the head and giving him a treat.

"Really? You know, Cloud reminds me of you too," you say softly, reaching out to pat the dog in question.

"Eh? Why?" His dark brown eyes widen in surprise, and you giggle at his astonished expression.

"Remember how shy Cloud was?" you ask as he bobs his head up and down earnestly. "You were the same," you remind him, referring to the memory of your first meeting. You recall when you and your mum went to greet the new neighbours. There little Shotaro was, clinging on to his mother's leg, peering at you as his inquisitive eyes shone, reflecting curiosity and nervousness.

"Oh yeah, I remember when I first met you when my family first moved in. I was hiding behind my mother because I was so scared to come and meet you," he finishes for you, chortling at the memory. "You had to come take my hand and invite me to play with you".

"Isn't that similar to Cloud? She was super shy, and she needed Jake to bring her out of her shell," you point out.

Shotaro's mouth forms an "o" as he realises what you mean. "Like how you had to bring me out of mine," he adds.

"But," you continue. "She's really sweet once you get to know her. Cloud ignored me initially. It's like how when I first talked to you, you barely even gave me a reply!" you recall more memories of that day as Shotaro's face flushes red at the memory of how he'd unintentionally ignored you. "I have to admit, I thought you were rude at first. But you turned out to be one of the sweetest people I've ever met," you say to him honestly, stopping to tease him about how the tips of his ears had turned a shade of red at the compliment, which only serves to make him more flustered. Since young, he'd always get embarrassed when he received compliments, and you found it adorable. "When Cloud finally opened up, I found her absolutely lovable. She's just like you, shy but sweet". You turn to Cloud and pat her as she whines, then pick her up and place her on your lap.

He smiles wider, pearly whites coming into view as you continue. "Dare I say, we've become as close as Jake and Cloud".

"We really have," he agrees as Jake climbs onto his lap, tongue hanging out of his mouth. He then touches his nose against Cloud's, and the both of you can't stop the "awws" that come out of your mouths at the heart-melting sight. "It's been so long since we've known each other".

"Yeah it's been like, twelve years?" you splutter with uncertainty, trying to recall when you'd first met him. "We've been friends for so long".

"Yeah, best friends," he adds, smiling softly. "I'm so grateful to have you as my friend".

"Me too," you manage to stutter out. You know you should be happy and satisfied with the fact that you had managed to build up and maintain such a precious friendship for twelve long years, yet your heart yearns for more. To bring your relationship to the next level and let it grow into something more. To be more than just his best friend. However, you know that another girl has his heart now. Even if that wasn't the case, would you even have the courage to tell him how you felt? To get all this off your chest?

You let out an inaudible sigh, knowing that the answer was no. You weren't his, neither was he yours.

»»————-----------------------　♡　-----------------------————-««

It's been a while since you'd been volunteering at the shelter together with Shotaro. Throughout the course of the volunteer programme, you've both grown a lot closer, and you found yourself catching butterflies more and more around him. However, you don't know what to make of it.

Gosh, why do feelings have to be so confusing? That's the only thought resonating in your mind as you're playing with a beagle in the backyard of the shelter. "Fetch, Bella!" You command, throwing a red ball to the other end of the yard. Bella yelps, jumps up and runs off in search of the ball, before returning it to you. "Good girl!"

Further off, Shotaro is playing with Jake and Cloud, who are playing tug-of-war with a chew toy, while Shotaro seems to be very immersed in watching the mini competition. His pearly whites are in clear view as he laughs, while his eyes, which are riveted on the dogs, are slightly squinted into the eye smile you'd grown to find so familiar and lovable. The sunlight bounced off his hazel brown irises, turning them into pools of honey. Cute, you think to yourself, a smile growing onto your face.

Bella's whining snaps you out of your daze. "Oh sorry!" you exclaim, knowing what she wants. Picking up the red ball, you hurl it to the other end of the yard again, and off Bella goes again, in pursuit of her ball.

"That's the dog Yangyang wants," Shotaro's voice sounds next to you. Turning around, you see him approaching you, both dogs by his side.

"Oh, so this is the dog he kept talking about during lunch yesterday," it dawns on you. Yangyang had been gushing about a dog he was looking to adopt yesterday at lunch, talking about how cute it was and how his parents loved it too. He'd agreed to let all of you play with her from time to time.

"Speak of the devil," you say as you both swivel your head towards Yangyang, who is being led over to the backyard by Xiaojun.

"Hi!" you both heartily greet your close friend with a high-five and fist bump.

"You guys know my cousin?" Xiaojun asks, watching the interaction between the three of you take place in front of him.

"Wait, you're his cousin?" Shotaro asks, surprise taking over his features.

"Didn't I tell you I have a cousin who volunteers at the animal shelter?" Yangyang reminds both of you. "I was referring to him".

"It's a small world," you say, still letting the information sink in.

"Yangyang's in our friend group at school. We're all close friends," Shotaro answers as he gives Yangyang a side hug enthusiastically.

"Yeah, though I think y/n and Shotaro act more like lovers than friends," Yangyang adds, lips twisting into a playful smirk as Xiaojun bursts into laughter.

"We're not! We're just friends!" Both you and Shotaro shout in unison, denying what Yangyang just said about the both of you. Unknowingly, by doing so, both of you shot arrows of dull pain through each other's hearts as you left the other wondering if that was all you both were.

"Sure," Xiaojun replies, rolling his eyes jokingly. He'd grown close enough to you guys to tease you too. "I'll believe that when you stop flirting while doing volunteer duties".

"What did we do?" you groan.

"For starters, when we're training the dogs, I always catch the both of you staring at each other," Xiaojun begins.

"We do that?" Shotaro blurts, a light hue of pink beginning to cover his cheeks. However, you don't notice.

"Yeah you do! They're always staring at each other in school too!" Yangyang pipes up. "Even when our friend group goes out! Like they can't keep their eyes to themselves!"

Xiaojun laughs again. "And then, when we walk the dogs, I always hear you both discussing plans with each other," he continues with Yangyang's loud guffaws in the background. "As if you guys are planning dates". He ensures that he emphasises on the last word, wiggling his bushy eyebrows.

"Best friend dates," you add on to what Xiaojun said. "We've been so close since childhood, of course we'd hang out together more often," you argue as Shotaro nods emphatically.

Yangyang rolls his eyes. "Whatever. Anyway, you can't convince me that there's nothing between you guys". He folded his arms, as if to prove his point, and you watch with mild irritation as Xiaojun does the same.

"He has a girlfriend". Pointing at Shotaro, you remind Yangyang of that fact.

"Doesn't mean much," Yangyang shrugs nonchalantly.

"Whatever. Let them figure things out themselves, okay? You still have adoption papers to sign," Xiaojun says with a dramatic eye roll, clipping the leash to Bella's collar and leading Yangyang away to sign the adoption papers.

As you and Shotaro say goodbye to them, you're both left shaking your heads in disbelief. However, their words make you realise how you've felt towards Shotaro for so long. You make a mental note to set a time to talk to your cousin and ask her for advice on what to do in this confusing situation.

»»————-----------------------　♡　-----------------------————-««

"Like, I seriously don't know what's wrong with me!" You huff, using your legs to gently push yourself on the swing, while your cousin, Hyojung, listens to your rant patiently. You managed to get her to meet you at the park to talk through your confusing feelings. "I've been friends with Shotaro since childhood, but never in the course of our friendship have I ever felt this way! I'm probably going crazy".

Hyojung listens attentively, grunting sympathetically from time to time. "y/n, I need to ask you something, and I want you to answer honestly".

You sit upright, looking straight at Hyojung, who's on the swing next to you. "Have you ever thought of him as more than a friend? Or wished that you could be something other than friends with him?"

The question catches you off-guard, and your heart skips a beat. "Wha-"

"y/n." Hyojung gazes at you with her classic motherly look and says your name with an equally motherly tone to match. "You can be honest, I won't judge you".

You fall silent again, thinking of all the times that you've felt that pang of jealousy when Shotaro mentioned Miyoung, when you watched them go on dates and wished that you were Miyoung instead, or when you prayed that Miyoung and Shotaro would cancel their dates. When you recall all the times that you wished it was you instead of Miyoung going on a date with him, you know the answer to your question. "Well...yes," you answer, slightly embarrassed as you look down, scratching the back of your neck.

Hyojung nods understandingly. "You're probably crushing on him then," she concludes casually, and your heart almost stops again.

"Wha- I can't- he's dating someone though!" you protest, wide-eyed.

"You can," Hyojung points out, and you freeze momentarily and go back to listening to her. "You can't control feelings, can you?"

You nod slowly, uncertain of the point she's trying to prove.

"What I'm saying is, feeling this way is completely normal, especially since you've known him for so long," she continues, giving her swing a light push again. "Plus, he's really sweet and gentlemanly, it won't be hard to fall for him".

You almost forget that Shotaro was so close to you, he'd met practically your whole family. "I guess," you sigh as your face falls.

"y/n, it's okay to have these feelings," she reassures you gently, squeezing your shoulder comfortingly. "What I'd suggest is to keep them to yourself for now. Observe his next steps carefully. If he shows signs that he's returning your feelings as well, then go ahead and tell him. If not, try your best to move on," she advises, and you slowly nod, taking in all the information.

"Alright, thanks Hyo," you answer and shoot her a grateful smile.

"No problem, y/n. Don't worry about it, the universe has it all planned out," she says, winking at you. "Now, wanna go get milkshakes? We could go to my house to hang out after this".

"Sure!" You'd never say no to a refreshing, sweet milkshake any day.

The universe has it all planned out. Hyojung's wise words echo in your mind as you let them sink in while walking to the milkshake shop with her. If you were meant to be with Shotaro, then it would come to pass. If not, you'd somehow find a way out of this sticky situation you were in.

»»————-----------------------　♡　-----------------------————-««

As the year progresses, stress begins mounting due to the increasing workload dumped on you by frantic teachers and your new responsibilities as BMA. Moreover, the butterflies inside of you that would go crazy around Shotaro do not serve to help at all, instead adding to your increasing stress and throwing you into confusion.

You're aware that the year isn't getting any easier for your friend either. Ever since he'd been voted in as council president, his responsibilities multiplied faster than any of you had expected. On top of that, his schoolwork and tuition classes had increased (due to his somewhat paranoid parents), and he also had responsibilities as student choreographer in his dance club. Not to mention, he had younger siblings to look after too.

Because you're both aware of the increasing amounts of stress each other face, you try to share each others' burdens, as any best friend would. Shotaro tries his best to help you with subjects that are not exactly your strong suit. You're kinda grateful for the stressful period, as it allows you both to form a stronger bond, whether it was while helping each other out with assignments, complaining about the amount of work you had to do, or listening to each other vent about their stresses. Of course, playing with the animals at the shelter every week also helped you both to unwind, especially Cloud and Jake. Their sweet friendship was really the spitting image of the one between you and Shotaro. They'd be wholesome one moment, and then playfully teasing each other the next. Xiaojun had also kindly allowed you and Shotaro to drop by anytime you felt overly stressed. Not only would he allow you to play with the animals to destress, he would also lend a listening ear as you both vented about the stresses you were facing, and provide encouragement and advice after. Even if he was feeling stressed over finals, he'd assure you both that it was alright to rant to him. You'd both grown closer to him, and you trusted him just like you trusted Hyojung.

However, though all of this was good, it also intensified the feelings you had for Shotaro, as you still struggle to tame the butterflies in your stomach at the way he thanks you when you help him plan a composition, or the palpitations of your heart when he shoots you that adorable smile.

When you couldn't handle the stress and fell sick for three days, he still dropped by your house with food, homework and notes he'd taken for you, although you'd protested against it as you didn't want him to fall sick too. If you were feeling up to it, he'd give you a short tutoring session. Before he left, he'd nag you to take your medicines again.

You were immensely grateful to him, knowing that without his help, you'd be seriously behind the rest of the class. In return, you try to help him with student council matters and babysitting. Whatever you were able to help with, you'd jump in and help him, and he did the same for you too, willingly.

You also knew that his relationship with Miyoung had hit a rocky patch. Though you were admittedly still jealous, you did your best to support him through the trying time. However, what you weren't aware of was the extent of how bad it had become. Shotaro realised that Miyoung never really texted him as much anymore. While he understood that she was busy, he noticed that she was only texting him when she needed something from him, be it help with a subject or extra money. Adding on to that, she'd grown harsher with him. If he'd unintentionally pissed her off, she'd use the harshest of words to scold him. Most of this stuff wasn't anything anyone would scold their friend for, and it wasn't even like he'd made a mistake either. Heck, she'd scold him for being an uncaring and selfish boyfriend just because he said he was stressed out or busy, and would get back to her later. It really bothered him.

In addition to that, he didn't know why his heart would flutter nonstop around you too, or why he'd sometimes find himself getting flustered when you spoke to him, even if you'd just asked him something simple like where both of you should go to eat lunch. It threw him into confusion mixed with a twinge of guilt. After all, he did have a girlfriend.

He didn't want to burden anyone, so he didn't share much about this issue with any of his friends, even you, and tried to keep it to himself. However, it was affecting him quite a bit, and you and your friends are eagle-eyed to spot the changes in his mood.

"Bro, you alright?" Donghyuck asks at your lunch table one day, directing the question to Shotaro, who seems more down than usual. The bags under his eyes seem to have been inked out with a pen, and his eyes have lost their usual cheerful glow. Not to mention, he's clammed up a lot more.

"Yeah," he replies, looking up and managing a half-smile. However, that does little to ease any of your worries. Where was the bright smile all of you loved so much?

"You seem so down lately, Taro," Jaemin points out, concern reflected in his gaze.

"I'm just stressed, that's all," he answers back.

"You know that you can come to us for help anytime, right?" you say, putting a hand on his shoulder.

He nods weakly, smiling half-heartedly again. "I will, thanks," he whispers.

However, the stress soon catches up to him, and soon after you've recovered, he announces in the group chat one day that the flu bug had bitten him too. You owe him one after he took such meticulous care of you, so now, it's your turn to do the same for him.

"Wow, y/n and Shotaro are so close, they share everything. Even germs," Renjun jokes at the table, causing everyone to cackle loudly, when you bring up Shotaro's illness, and the fact that he'll be off school for a week.

Rolling your eyes, you scoff. "Very funny, Jun," you spit, tone laced with sarcasm.

"Seriously though," Donghyuck whines from his end of the table. "When will you tell him how you feel? It's been ages, y/n," he complains.

You feel your heart stop at the question. "W-what do y-you mean how I f-feel?" you stutter, failing to keep your cool.

Yangyang rolls his eyes and sighs dramatically. "Come on, y/n," he groans. "Don't think that we're unaware of your little crush on your childhood best friend".

"What crush?" You continue trying to play it cool, feigning indifference. "It's not like I-"

"Don't lie, y/n," Jaemin cuts you off. "We've known each other since high school started, we can read you like an open book".

"The signs are so obvious, even I can see it," Jeno speaks up. "And we all know I'm the most oblivious here". It was a fact, given that he didn't even know that his past crush, who is now his current girlfriend, liked him until she confessed two years later, despite so many obvious signs from her. "I don't know how Shotaro hasn't picked up on them".

You raise up your hands in surrender, knowing that there was no point in arguing with the friends you'd known for so long. Not as long as you'd known Shotaro, but still long enough to forge a bond thick as thieves. "Okay, okay, fine, I do like him," you admit as you feel your cheeks burn. "But I don't plan to do anything about it. He probably doesn't even like me back". You shrug, trying to feign indifference when in reality, it felt like you'd gotten the tiniest paper cut on your heart. So small, but it stung so much.

Jeno groans and throws his hands up, exasperated. "Oh please, the way he stares at you? Do you really not notice?"

"He has a girlfriend…" you remind them, thinking that they had forgotten.

As soon as you mention his girlfriend, groans and yells of protest go up around your table, starting a mini uproar. "Kim Miyoung? Really?" Renjun scoffs.

"She's been treating him like shit!" Yangyang adds passionately, eyes burning with rage.

"Who in their right mind would scold their boyfriend just for saying he's stressed?" Jaemin continues, brows furrowed in fury.

"I don't think he's even in love with her anymore," Jeno adds. "We've been trying to get him to break up with her, but he's still with her only because he's too scared to break up".

The boys continue to each give a piece of their mind about Miyoung, but Donghyuck remains dead silent throughout. "Um...I'm not sure how to tell you guys this, but...you've gotta see this".

A hush falls over the usually boisterous group at the table, and all five of you crowd expectantly around Donghyuck's phone. He draws up a picture, and as he zooms in, all of you gasp in unison. "Don't tell me that's-"

"That's Miyoung". Donghyuck confirms as he cuts Yangyang off, nodding his head solemnly. "I was passing by, and so happened to witness this".

"Is she- kissing another guy?" Jaemin asks, jaw dropping in disbelief.

"Wow, she was shitty, but I never thought she'd stoop so low and cheat on him," Jeno says scornfully as he rolls his eyes.

"That's low even for her," Renjun agrees.

Meanwhile, you're boiling inside. How could she do such a disgusting thing? You knew that if you'd managed to get with someone as sweet as Shotaro, thoughts of cheating would never, ever cross your mind. "That's not cool," you deadpan, trying to stay calm despite the raging storm inside of your heart now.

"I think he's been so stressed because Miyoung's been manipulating him for so long," Renjun guesses. "Adding on to that, he's got school, student council, dance club, tuition and the animal shelter".

"We've gotta force him to break up with her, before his relationship gets more toxic than it already is," you declare. You're not about to watch your best friend get sucked deeper into a raging whirlpool of a toxic relationship only to be taken advantage of, stepped on, and eventually drowned.

"I don't know how we're gonna do that though…" Jaemin's voice trails off.

"Look, we have a whole week to think about it. Let's use the time wisely," Donghyuck decides as grunts of approval sound all around the table.

»»————-----------------------　♡　-----------------------————-««

A week later, Shotaro returns to school, visibly much more well-rested. You'd been popping by his house every day throughout the week with his homework and warm food for him, filling him in on what he'd missed if he felt well enough, or simply keeping him company. "Hi guys! I've missed you all," he chirps as soon as he sits down at the table with your usual clique. Soon, your table is back to its usual chaotic state, as everyone seems to be in a good mood. That is, until…

"Shotaro...I'm really sorry but, you need to know this". Donghyuck interrupts the cheerful banter, pulling out his phone.

"Is it something serious…?" Shotaro questions as an uncomfortable silence once again falls over the table, and the atmosphere becomes tenser than a stretched-out rubber band.

"Well, yes," Jeno states, having caught Donghyuck's drift.

Without saying another word, Donghyuck shoves his phone under Shotaro's nose. You catch the way his jaw drops to the ground, and how his hand flies to his mouth. "No way…" he whispers, shock written all over his face.

"Hyuck caught her cheating in 4K," Yangyang says as Donghyuck lowers his phone. "You have to break up with her, Taro. She's gone too far".

"Please take into account all the times she's treated you like shit," Renjun cuts Shotaro off as he's about to protest.

The six of you observe as Shotaro's eyes gloss over with dismay, and you swear you can feel your own heart shattering into pieces as you watch his smile fade, instead being replaced with a frown as the corners of his mouth turn down. "I…I can't believe this," he whispers sadly, blinking a few times. "She wasn't being very nice, but I never thought she'd cheat".

"'Not being very nice' is an understatement at this point". Jeno huffs, indignation written all over his face. "She's been nothing but toxic".

"You have to confront her, Shotaro". Jaemin states, giving him his signature motherly stare. After all, he wasn't the "mom of the group" for no reason.

"I don't know…" Shotaro responds, shifting in his seat uneasily as he turns his eyes down.

"It's the best thing for you to do right now," Jeno adds, trying to coax Shotaro to initiate the breakup, since Miyoung wouldn't willingly do so and knowing him, he probably wouldn't be brave enough to do so.

"But…" his voice trails off slowly.

"Look Taro, it's time you let go of her," you speak up. "It's been so long since you've been trapped in this toxic relationship".

"I…" he stutters again, not sure of what to say. "I...kind of don't want to…"

"And why's that?" You do your best to sound patient, but the first arrow of jealousy shoots through your heart as you speak.

"I'm scared to do so, honestly," he confesses, voice barely a whisper.

"We'll all be here to back you up," Jeno encourages him.

"But still…" Shotaro continues on, still unsure.

“Shotaro… you know we love you, we’re your friends, we’ve been through so many things together, you really think we’d ask you to do this just to mess with you?” Renjun says, tone laced with concern.

“…”

“Taro, listen to me: we’d never want something bad to happen to you, much less stand back for long as we watch how a person drags you down, becoming a shell of who you used to be," you add, hopeful that this would convince him to make the first move to breakup.

"But I'm scared…" he protests weakly.

"Really? That's the best excuse you have?" you scoff, the jealousy you were suppressing so well earlier slowly seeping through the walls of your heart, like water from a leaking dam.

"It's scary, okay? Don't talk like that when you haven't been in a relationship before!" Shotaro replies, clearly a little irritated.

"It's not that hard!" you snap back. Jeno, ever the sensible one, nudges you trying to calm you down, but jealousy had just about completely taken over you by then.

Everyone at the table watches as Shotaro draws in a deep breath. "If what you're saying is true," he begins, “then why haven’t you said anything before, huh?! She told me you’d try this, you know? That you’d get jealous when I didn’t spend as much time with you as I did with her, but that’s not my fault! I’m allowed to have a relationship!” he argues back. "I don't discount the possibility of what you said being true, but I'm not ready to break up now!"

“We did, Taro! We did! So many times, and you brushed it off, or chose to ignore us, when all we wanted was to let you see for yourself how she was hurting you!” you shout back. By now, the entire canteen's eyes are riveted on the scene.

“But she isn’t hurting me! She loves me!” he protests. His tone sounded more like he was trying to convince himself, rather than like he actually believed what he just said. You swore that you saw a glistening layer over his eyes.

“No she doesn’t and you know that!” you fire back, sounding as heated as you feel.

"Well how would you know?" he demands, sounding more annoyed with every word he spoke. "You're not her".

"When the fuck will you stop being so stubborn and actually listen to what we're saying? Gosh, Shotaro. Aren't friends supposed to listen to each other? Then why are you still stuck in your own stupid corner, refusing to see things from our perspective? Who do you think you are, God?" you spit, tone containing traces of venom. By now, every emotion you felt - jealousy, anger, heartache - they swirled together in your heart, creating a tempestuous storm which raged on fiercely.

"Then why don't you believe me when I say I'm scared?" he questions, a stray tear escaping his eyes. "Why don't you understand how I feel?"

"It's. Not. That. Hard!" You're screaming your head off now, with the rest of your friend group standing around, not knowing how to react. "I can't believe you're still so weak, even after so long!"

"I-" Shotaro tries to say, but you hold out a hand.

"Whatever. If you're going to continue being stuck wherever you are, I'm not gonna bother. Go on being the fucking blind coward you are". You declare, slamming your hands onto the table with a thump of finality, before strutting away from the table, huffing as you exit.

»»————-----------------------　♡　-----------------------————-««

That day, you and Shotaro go separate ways, because he had to meet Miyoung and also partly because of the argument you'd both had earlier. You head straight home, take a shower, and try to get to your homework, but your mind isn't focusing. Instead, it keeps jumping back to the argument you and Shotaro had earlier.

Why was I so upset over it earlier? That's not me.

Realising that you won't be getting anything done, you pick up your phone and send Xiaojun a text.

You: hey, can i come over?

Xiaojun: sure! i'll be a while though, attending to an injured guinea pig

Xiaojun: you can go play with the animals first! the dogs are in the backyard

You: okay

You pack a few things, then leave your house for the shelter. Making a beeline for the backyard, you catch sight of Cloud, who's lying next to a sound-asleep Jake. It seems that she's spotted you too, because her ears perk up and she immediately leaves Jake's side and comes trotting to you. "Hey Cloud," you say, feeling some of the gloom in your heart dissolve as you pick up her favourite toy and begin playing fetch with her. As usual, she's a ball of energy, running after the toy no matter how far or where you threw it, barking as she does so.

After a while, she grows tired, and she settles down on your lap as you sit on the grass and stroke her smooth, white coat. "You came," Xiaojun's voice sounds from beside you as he emerges from the shelter.

"Yeah," you reply lamely.

"Something bothering you?" he asks, voice showing concern as he sits next to you. Jake comes up next to him, and lies down again. Xiaojun begins running his hand over Jake's fur.

"Well...me and Shotaro, we kinda had an argument," you admit.

"What was it about?" Xiaojun asks again.

"My friend group and I were trying to convince him to break up with his girlfriend, since she's been nothing but manipulative and toxic to him. Also, she cheated on him. We have photographic proof," you begin as Xiaojun nods, beckoning you to go on. You show him the photo, and he tuts disapprovingly at the girl, shaking his head.

"But he kept saying that he was afraid to do so, and...I don't know why, but I lost my cool. I said some things I shouldn't have. I called him blind and a coward, and I know that the 'coward' one would hurt him really badly. I regret it now. I don't even know why I did what I did," you sigh, regret beginning to hit you like a ton of bricks. "It's not like me to react this way".

Xiaojun hums in understanding as he purses his lips for the right words. "I get it," he says finally. "I don't know if I'm right, but...maybe you're feeling jealous".

You consider denying it for a few seconds, but decide against it, letting your shoulders sag in defeat. "Okay, maybe I am," you admit.

"So that's why you lashed out when he said he didn't want to break up with Miyoung, besides the fact that you were concerned for him," Xiaojun adds as you nod meekly, knowing that the truth was out. You found that Xiaojun was trustworthy, so you trusted him enough to tell him how you truly felt about Shotaro.

"It was partly the reason, but not the main one," you add. "Oh, how do I get over these stupid feelings?" you groan, more to yourself than to Xiaojun.

Xiaojun nods again. "Sometimes, you just let them pass. Other times, you act on them," he tells you truthfully. "They might be there for a reason. If they're not, you'll find a way," he answers.

He seriously sounded like Hyojung. "Okay," you reply, letting out another heavy sigh. "Do you think I've ruined our friendship?" you ask, petting Cloud dejectedly as she falls asleep.

Xiaojun thinks your question over, before turning back and giving you an answer. "No. Shotaro's very sweet and forgiving. You're his childhood best friend, he'd definitely forgive you, I'm sure".

You nod slowly, processing what Xiaojun is saying.

"But I think you both should apologise to each other," Xiaojun continues on. "Both of you definitely exchanged hurtful remarks, and everyone's feelings were hurt in the process," he says truthfully. "I hope you both can fix things. I don't want to witness your friendship crumble".

You nod. "I hope so too".

Xiaojun gives you a warm, reassuring smile. "I've got stuff to attend to now. My project group wants to call," he informs you. "I might be back later. If I am, I'll say hi to you again," he informs. "I hope you're feeling better.

"I am," you say. It wasn't a lie. Xiaojun's advice had given you some comfort compared to earlier. As he walks away, you fail to see Shotaro come in from the corner of your eye. That is, until Jake perks up, brown eyes gleaming excitedly as he lets out a happy bark, then gets up and rushes towards the gate.

Shotaro must have seen you too, because you watch as he quickly averts his gaze from you, choosing to focus his attention on Jake instead as he showers him with lots of love and pets. A pang of guilt arises in you as the events of the earlier argument replay in your mind. Way to go, snapping at him over something dumb and possibly ruining your friendship.

You're so focused on moping, you don't realise that Shotaro has come to sit next to you. "I'm sorry," his voice suddenly cuts through your thoughts, and you sit up with a start.

You turn, and suddenly you're staring into his brown eyes, which held so much emotion in that moment. "For what?" you ask listlessly, mindlessly stroking Cloud's fur.

"For snapping earlier. I should have kept my cool and controlled my emotions better. I know I said insensitive things," he says quietly, turning his eyes downwards again. Jake seems to have sensed that he wasn't feeling good, because he's now started licking Shotaro's hand comfortingly. "I'm really sorry. I should have thought before I spoke".

"Why are you apologising? I should be the one saying sorry," you blurt out. "I blew up at you first, and -" you pause, scrabbling in your mind for the right words, before finally giving up. "I don't even know why. It's a dumb reason, I know, but it's the truth".

"It's not dumb," Shotaro answers. "We've all been there, haven't we?" A chuckle of amusement escapes him.

"It's still not an excuse," you protest feebly, your last brain cell having long given up on you. "I'm truly sorry for lashing out on you earlier".

Shotaro smiles reassuringly. "I forgive you. I hope you'll forgive me too".

"Of course I will," you reply, squeezing his shoulder to comfort him. "We're still friends, right?"

You wish to slap yourself right then and there, for randomly blurting out every thought that was on your mind.

Shotaro giggles, sending waves through you again. "Of course! Do you really think I'd throw twelve years' worth of friendship away like that?" he asks.

You smile, knowing that you could finally stop worrying about what would become of you and Shotaro's friendship. Just then, you catch sight of his tear-streaked cheeks, and the fact that his eyes are slightly red and swollen. "Did something happen?" you inquire, genuinely concerned for Shotaro now as your brows knit together in concern. "You can tell me anything," you reassure him. You'd gone from insulting him a few hours ago to comforting him when bad stuff happened.

Shotaro's face falls. "About that..I broke up with her". He quietly says.

Your eyes widen in interest. "You did? She initiated it?"

He shakes his head. "No. I did".

You place an arm around him in silent comfort, preparing to listen to his story. "I thought about what the friend group said today at recess, and decided that yes, as much as I was scared, I did have to end the toxic relationship. So I showed her the picture Donghyuck took as proof, and let her know that I felt disrespected that she'd gone and cheated on me, instead of telling me that she had feelings for someone else so that we could work things out together, or have a closure".

Nodding, you urge him to go on. "I was just hoping for an apology from her so that we could end things peacefully, but she slapped me instead".

"Ayo what-" at his statement, your jaw drops, and your mouth is so wide open that a cow could probably fall into it. That explained the faint purple bruise on his cheek. You had expected her to get angry, but to slap him? Was she insane?

"She said that it was my fault that we didn't work out and-" his eyes swim with tears again as he pauses, and you feel your own eyes water at the heart-wrenching sight. Choking on a sob, he continues. "She said that she should have known that I wasn't good enough for her". Both dogs seem to pick up on the change in mood, and immediately snuggle closer to him, as if trying to cheer him up as he pets them gratefully.

Hearing this, your blood begins boiling. "Not good enough for her?"

"She said that I was too ugly for her. That I was too sensitive. That she would have liked me better if I was tougher - and I quote - because she wouldn't want to date a pussy," he sniffs, feeling himself break down again. "She also said I was selfish for all the times I replied to her late because I was busy. That I didn't put any effort into the relationship".

"Liar," you spit, voice dripping with venom. "Who is she to speak?" Your volume increases in a crescendo as your voice rises to fever-pitch. Unable to hold in your fury, you begin swearing your head off while ranting about Miyoung, spewing profanities a mile per minute. By now, both dogs are also barking their heads off, as if angry with Miyoung as well.

Shotaro has calmed down a little, and is now looking at you, unsure of whether to stop you or let you go on raging like a bull. "Um...y/n...please calm down," he says softly, tapping on your shoulder.

You stop midway through the freestyle diss track you were on, realising you'd said some things you probably shouldn't have said. (Then again, who holds back when defending their best friend?)

Shotaro sighs, eyes still glistening with tears. "It's just...what if she was right? What if I was less selfish? What if I was tougher? What if I-"

"I'm stopping you right there!" You cut him off as you gently nudge him, unable to watch him keep blaming himself for the failure of the relationship. "It's not you, you know. It's her".

He looks you in the eye for the first time throughout the conversation. "They say it takes two hands to clap, though".

"Look, if she can't accept you for who you are, that's her fault". You state your point clearly, gazing at him in a firm yet comforting manner. "And she took advantage of you, didn't she? She manipulated you to get what she wanted!"

Shotaro nods, knowing that what you said was true.

"And you were the one always checking in on her, listening to her rant. Not once did she care to ask how you were doing. She'd just go straight on and rant about her problems," you continue as more of her flaws continue coming to your mind.

"Yeah…" Shotaro muses.

"Weren't you the one who asked her out most of the time? What does she mean by 'you didn't put in effort'? And not to mention, she was the one who cheated, not you. You were loyal even to the end. The same can't be said about her," you add, still in a huff over what she had done to your friend. Jake and Cloud cuddle up next to Shotaro as he pets the dogs.

"That's true I guess…" Shotaro looks away again, contemplating what you just said.

"How did you hold on to such a toxic relationship for so long?" you question Shotaro, narrowing your eyes as you silently wonder how he was still able to love someone like her.

"I guess I was just scared of breaking it off. She was really nice at first, and we were truly in love with each other," he begins, turning his eyes downwards again. "But over the course of our relationship I realised that she was becoming more and more manipulative, and I found interacting with her becoming extremely draining. I think at that point, I fell out of love with her, but I still stuck around, knowing that I didn't have the courage to cut off the relationship".

You nod encouragingly, patting him on the shoulder. "I'm glad you found it in the end".

"Yeah, I feel so much more relieved after ending the relationship, to be honest," he admits, much calmer than he was before. "I feel so dumb for crying over this now," he adds with a small laugh.

"No," you shake your head. "Don't feel that way. She said stuff that really stung". You knew that she'd attacked his insecurities and guilt-tripped him during the confrontation, so he would no doubt be feeling very hurt about it. "Besides, there were feelings attached for a while, especially at the beginning of the relationship".

Shotaro hums, knowing that that was true.

"And don't change a thing about yourself. You're great the way you are," you encourage him, smiling at him reassuringly as you put a hand on his shoulder.

"Really?" he looks at you, expression betraying his disbelief.

"Of course! If not, you wouldn't be my best friend!" you reply, smacking him playfully as he begins laughing.

Unbeknownst to you, Xiaojun watches the scene from afar, a smile on his face, feeling happy that the storm clouds had cleared and your friendship was restored.

»»————-----------------------　♡　-----------------------————-««

The rest of the week progresses as if the argument didn't happen at all, and Shotaro and you are back to being the best of friends. Saturday arrives, and after a quick drink of a vanilla latte the both of you are ready to head to the shelter for another day of volunteering. Today, there seems to be less duties than usual, and both of you have about two hours left to train the dogs and play with them.

You enter the Dog Dorm, and both your eyes light up immediately as soon as Jake and Cloud run over.

You've forged a strong bond with these two dogs, and it is evident from the way they follow you around like the lamb in the nursery rhyme. When you both leave, Jake's whimpers and whines would tug at your heartstrings as he tried to follow both of you out, while Cloud would just gaze at both of you, sadness evident in her large puppy eyes.

"They're so cute," you say as Cloud is sitting in your lap as you pat Jake. "I want one of them".

"Me too," Shotaro says, reaching over to feed Cloud a treat. "I miss having a dog around the house".

"Why don't you adopt them then?" Xiaojun asks as he enters the area with a golden retriever, who'd just returned from a grooming session. "They'd suit you".

"I've discussed it with my parents, actually," Shotaro speaks first as Jake runs up to Xiaojun. "They said that Jake sounds like a really sweet dog, and that they'd be open to the idea of adopting him".

"I have yet to talk to my parents, but I believe they'd be alright with adopting Cloud," you mention after Shotaro. "Besides, Pebble gets along with dogs well". You smile at the thought of your fluffy, but slightly chonky, grey cat you keep at home.

"That's great!" Xiaojun enthuses, unable to hide his happy smile as he . "Jake and Cloud do need forever homes, but they can't be separated for too long, so we thought you'd both be great candidates for potential owners since you're both next door neighbours. They've been best friends since they were puppies," he explains. "Like the both of you, childhood best friends".

You both laugh at the statement, but neither of you pick up on the hints of bitterness in both of your laughs. Best friends? Why did your relationship have to stay like that?

Was that all both of you would ever be?

Little did you know, Xiaojun had picked up on it as he went on talking, informing you about the adoption process, which involved paperwork and a house visit.

As he had hoped, you'd both convinced your families to let you adopt the dogs. Sending the dogs off with you both, he silently prayed that your new pets would help you both get closer than you already were.

And they did.

You'd both meet up even more frequently now to let the dogs play with each other. Today, he’s at your house, enjoying a cup of hot chocolate as Cloud, Jake and Pebble chase each other around the house.

"Your cat is really friendly with dogs," he comments as he watches Pebble play wrestle Cloud to the ground.

"Yeah, she's used to them," you reply. "Actually, maybe more than that," you add with a laugh as Pebble allows Jake to gently bite one of her ears, conceding defeat.

"Oh yeah, I trained Jake to do this," Shotaro says, perking up as he remembers.

"Hmm? What is it?" Your curiosity is piqued as Shotaro calls Jake over.

You watch as Shotaro holds out his fingers in a gun position in front of Jake. "Bang!" he says, flicking his hand upwards as if he'd just shot Jake. The Samoyed falls over with his eyes shut as he remains motionless. His mouth is slightly open with his tongue lolling out, for an even more realistic effect, and you can't help but laugh at the sight.

"Jake learns so well!" You marvel as the pup gets back up, wagging his tail excitedly as he eyed the treats in Shotaro's hand. Cloud barks, as if egging Jake on and telling him he did a great job as Shotaro feeds the treats to both dogs.

"It took him a while to learn, but he got it in the end," Shotaro tells you. "He does learn quite fast".

"Faster than you," you reply, taking the chance to roast Shotaro.

"Hey!" he says with a small pout, obviously caught off-guard by your sudden roast. However, he can't resist the urge to laugh as well when your own contagious laughter fills the room. As such, that afternoon ends with laughter and smiles.

»»————-----------------------　♡　-----------------------————-««

"Oh no," Yangyang whines, dejectedly tossing his pen onto the floor. It clatters as he runs his fingers through his hair in frustration and turns to the paper again. "I still don't understand this!"

You're all at Shotaro's house for your weekly study session together. Yes, the whole group only met together for study sessions and occasional sleepovers on Fridays, but you had the privilege of going over every day. Childhood best friend and neighbour privileges.

"Exams are fast approaching, and then soon...we'll be in our final year," Renjun comments, glancing up from the history textbook he'd been studying. "Time really flies".

"Yeah…I hope we'll all do well," Jaemin answers, not looking up from his English notebook. "We've all worked hard".

"We will," Shotaro adds with certainty. "Even if it's not up to our expectations, we'll all still do well".

"As long as we've done our best, we can be proud of ourselves," Jeno reminds all of you. "Don't beat yourself up. What's more important is that you learn from your mistakes".

"Thanks for the advice, Jeno," Yangyang states as he picks up his pen and sighs again. "But I still really need help with this part".

"I'll help, " Jeno responds, taking the book from Yangyang and studying the question.

You're stuck in about the same position as Yangyang as you're left gawking at your history paper as if it were written in Greek. However, unlike the boy, you didn't voice your concerns. You continued to stare at the page, trying to process the question. However, the words seemed to dance around the page, and before you know it, you're zoning out.

"Need help?" You snap out of your daze as Shotaro's soft voice rings next to your ear, and his hand appears on your shoulder.

"Yeah...I just can't seem to understand this source," you say, pointing out one of the questions to Shotaro.

"Oh! I understand it, I finished this yesterday," he says, grinning excitedly as he finishes studying the question. "I'll help you with it!"

"Thanks…" you try your best to sound cheerful and energetic, although the pressure weighing down on your heart prevents you from actually feeling like it. You were sure that the others also felt stressed, but they weren't saying anything, so you shouldn't either.

"...y/n? y/n? Earth to y/n…?" A hand waves in front of your face, and you're brought back to reality.

"Ah...sorry, I spaced out," you admit, a blush creeping across your cheeks. Whether it was from embarrassment or something else, you didn't know. Maybe both.

Shotaro's brows knit together. "Are you anxious?" he asks, knowing that you tend to space out when you're anxious. "Let's go, we can talk it out".

He excuses the both of you and leads you to the kitchen. After pouring you a glass of water, he sits you down at his kitchen table. "How are you feeling?" he asks, putting the jug back.

You shake your head as your heart rate seems to double, your breaths become faster and shallower, tears threatening to fall. "I...I…" you stutter, brain unable to form sentences and words at the moment.

Shotaro picks up on your distress, and sweeps you into a hug. You don't resist, instead reciprocating it. "Let it all out. I know you've been stressed," he tells you as your tears fall onto his shoulder. You sniffle quietly, the floodgates opening as you stay enclosed in his embrace for a few minutes, letting the tears freely flow.

"I- I'm stressed," you admit. "The exams are coming soon…and what's more, all the new responsibilities of the student council, band…"

He grunts sympathetically, lips pursed as he searches for the right words.

"What if I fail and get retained? I won't be able to live that down," you sniffle as you recall the dreadful sense of failure after you didn't do well in your exams last year.

All is silent for a moment as Shotaro thinks of his next words. "You won't. You're bright and smart, and you've worked super hard. Besides, no matter what the outcome, I'll always be here for you," he mumbles, unsure of whether what he is saying is helpful.

You look up at him. "Really?"

"Yes, really," he replies, giving you a warm smile, the smile that always brought you comfort, yet made you get a nervous rush at the same time. It's at this moment that you both realise you've probably been hugging a little too long, and you abruptly pull out of each others' hold.

Wish it lasted longer.

"Thank you so much," you whisper, feeling a lot less anxious than you were a few minutes ago.

"Glad I could help," he answers as he rubs your back comfortingly. "When exams are over, we'll do what we used to do as kids and have sleepovers, just you and me, okay? Of course, we'll also have one with the others, but I'd like to just hang out with you first".

"I'd love that," you nod. "Thank you, Taro. I love you".

As soon as the words leave your mouth, you're stunned by your unexpected confession. Oh no! What an idiot, he's gonna think you're weird now! You think, a small wave of panic washing over your mind again.

A light blush forms on Shotaro's cheeks as his mouth forms a stunned "o". "You mean it-?" he asks, unable to believe his ears.

"I- of course I do! But platonically! Platonically!" Painful as it was to say, you still had to add the fact that you meant it platonically and not romantically.

It feels as if someone lightly cut your heart with a small shard of glass when his giggles reach your ears. "I love you too," he replies. "Platonically". The last word is so soft, you barely hear it.

"Woi! Are you both done?" an impatient shout and a few knocks sounds outside the door. "You've both been gone so long!" Renjun's voice continues.

A panicked look simultaneously crosses your faces as Shotaro rushes to open the door and usher you out. "Yes, yes! We're ready!" he exclaims, dragging you out of the room

Oh, how I wish I wasn't such a chicken and told him I meant it in some other way.

»»————-----------------------　♡　-----------------------————-««

"It's finished!"

"We did it!"

Cheerful shouts and screams echo through the corridor of the level as students celebrate the end of their exams, and of course you and Shotaro just had to join the impromptu celebrations as well. "We did it, Taro!" you enthusiastically shout, slinging an arm around his shoulder as you both skip out of the classroom.

"Finally! Good job, y/n," his melodious laugh finally sounds out again after so long, due to him feeling too stressed to be happy. Relief washed over your heart as you saw an adorable grin appear on his face, complete with his signature eye smile. He gives you a high-five to congratulate you.

"The exams were quite alright, actually," you say to Shotaro as he bobs his head up and down in agreement with you.

"They weren't that bad. The only subject I'm kinda worried about is Biology, but it wasn't too hard," he agrees. "Our mugging sure paid off!" he adds, excited that his hard work had paid off.

"Now that it's over, we should celebrate together!" you suggest, excitement still bubbling out of you. "We should hang out!"

Shotaro's eyes sparkle at your suggestion. "We should! Oh yeah, I said that after exams, we'd have a sleepover together," he reminds you.

"Right, you did," you recall. "So when?"

"Tonight? 7 pm?" he suggests. "You alright with that?"

You think for a few seconds before replying. "Should be. If I can't make it, I'll text you," you add.

He nods, still grinning so brightly, he could rival the sun. "Alright then, I'll see you later! You can bring Cloud and Pebble if you want".

True to your word, you arrive at his house at 7 pm sharp. He appears at the door as soon as you show up at his doorstep. "Y/n!" he greets cheerfully, seemingly delighted that you'd get to have a sleepover with him again after forever.

"Taro!" You return his greeting before pulling him in for a hug.

Soon, you’re both in the comfort of his room, sitting on the carpet on his floor. “So…what do you wanna do?” he asks, uncertain. “We could watch Netflix, or we could play a game, or we could do something else…”

“Let’s play Mario Kart. I’ll beat your high score this time,” you smirk, confident that this time you’d win. The last time you both played, it didn’t go well for you, with you losing terribly and Shotaro celebrating his victory in front of you.

“It’s on”. Shotaro narrows his eyes into slits and stares at you for a while before moving to set up the game consoles. Soon, you're engaged in an intense battle of Mario Kart together, with both of you trying to distract each other to win the game. Meanwhile, Jake and Cloud watch at the side, barking. It’s a close fight, but just at the end, you overtake him and win by one second.

“Hey! You cheated!” Shotaro protests. He was referring to the way you’d made so many weird noises and faces in front of him just to distract him - which apparently was successful.

“Did not,” you say in response. “You tried distracting me too!”

“But I didn’t even do that as much as you!” he argues.

You roll your eyes and sigh dramatically. “I still won, fair and square”.

Sighing, he shakes his head and gets up, tackling you to the ground. You panic a little as you’re unable to overpower him, as he towers over you with his height.

At that moment, an idea strikes you. There was one strategy that you hadn't used against Shotaro since your childhood. But you remember that it was very effective, with him surrendering within minutes. You're unsure if it will work again, but you try anyway, reaching up with your free hand to poke his side lightly. You can't stop the smirk that forms on your face as he withdraws and lets out a small squeak.

You grin the most evil grin you've ever grinned in your life, and soon the tables have turned, with him desperately trying to squirm away from you and block your attacks while you simply laugh at his predicament, continuing to tickle him. The heart-melting smile you'd always loved appears on his face, his eyes lighting up as laughter and occasional squeals pour out of him. You soon find yourself laughing with him as you watch him smile and laugh brighter than a ray of sunshine while you chase him.

"y/n stop!" he repeatedly begs in between laughs. He tries to tickle you back, which fails since you're not ticklish.

"No!" you resolutely declare, and keep up the attack. That is, until a loud thump sounds and Shotaro lets out an "ouch", prompting you to stop.

"Oh my goodness, are you alright?" you ask him repeatedly as you check on him. While struggling to escape from you, he'd rolled all the way to where his study table was and hit his head on the leg of the table. "I'm so sorry, Taro," you apologise, feeling genuinely concerned for him.

He sits up, rubbing his head, still laughing. "It's alright, y/n. That was actually kinda funny," he giggles. It seemed as if his smile had never faded by the slightest bit.

Seeing that he's alright, you let out a sigh of relief, and before you know it laughter fills the room as you both share a laugh over what had just happened. Looking into your eyes, in that moment, Shotaro could feel something warm and fuzzy bubbling up inside of his heart - maybe even something fluttering inside of him. Memories of the times you'd had together run through his mind, almost as if he was reliving them. The first time you'd met, the first playdate you'd both had, the smiles of elation shared during middle school graduation. The countless laughs shared together, the times you'd cried with each other, the times you'd helped each other through school while complaining together. You were the one who'd been there with him, come hell or high water, since childhood. At that moment, he realises that you're truly his other half. Not someone like Kim Miyoung, who'd just used him like her puppet, manipulating him for her own purposes and trampling on his feelings. He realises that the fluttering in his heart, the giddy feeling, the blush that would find its way to his cheeks whenever he was around you - there was a reason why he felt all of those.

He knew that you were just the right one for him. But what was stopping him? On one hand, he desired to spill all his feelings to you. To hold on to that small sliver of hope he had that'd you'd return his feelings, let you know how he realised he felt about you, even if he'd just ended a relationship gone wrong. Though technically, it had ended long ago, with the hell she'd put him through.

On the other hand, something stopped him. What was it? He couldn't pinpoint it either. All he knew was that the right time was not now. Besides, his freshly wounded heart wasn't ready for another relationship. Yet.

He sighs inwardly. Why are feelings so complicated? He questions. If only it were simpler. Maybe I'd have an easier time...

"Whatever. Good game," your voice permeates his thoughts and brings him back to reality. "What do you wanna do now?"

"We could watch Netflix," he suggests, turning on the TV. "There's this new show I wanna watch".

Soon, you're both engaged in the movie. Jake, Cloud and Pebble have long fallen asleep, sharing the big dog bed. You don't know when you realise, but at some point your head ends up resting on his shoulder. His arm is slung around your shoulders, and you're aware of his thumb rubbing circles on the back of your hand. You look up and you're met with the sight of him focused on the screen, his eye smile in full view as he focuses on the scene playing in front of you. The scent of his sakura shampoo wafts into your nose.

Is this really what just friends do? You question internally. Before you know it, you've drifted into dreamland.

"Every day...I fall for you harder," Shotaro confesses quietly as he caresses your hair gently. His whisper is snatched away by the gentle night wind as it goes by unheard by you, as you're sound asleep.

»»————-----------------------　♡　-----------------------————-««

“Fetch!” Shotaro’s voice resonates in the evening air as he hurls the rubber ball some distance away. All three animals jump up and race after the ball. To your amusement, Pebble comes running back with the ball in her mouth, the other two animals hot on her heels.

“Looks like letting Pebble befriend dogs was a good choice,” you remark, taking the ball and patting Pebble on the head. “This is the most active she’s been!” Both of you laugh, knowing that before both dogs were adopted by you and Shotaro, Pebble had spent most of her days lazing around in the house. When she wasn’t eating, she was either sitting or sleeping.

A few more rounds of fetch later, when everyone is tired out, all of you find a big tree to sit down under and rest. That’s when Shotaro gets the idea of showing you the item that the dance club is going to perform for the upcoming New Year’s Countdown celebration, that is held yearly by the town council, featuring performances from residents, young and old alike. The school had sent the dance club and the symphonic band to perform, so the both of you would be performing. Earlier that day at the shelter, Xiaojun had revealed that he had been chosen to emcee for the celebration.

“And…that’s it!” Shotaro does the ending pose as you burst into applause. He then walks off, smiling shyly as he makes his way back to sit beside you under the tree. “That’s about it,” he says.

“That was so good, Taro! I can’t wait to see the dance club’s performance!” Even after he was done, you were still marvelling over the complexity of the routine, which stood out even more due to his beautiful technique. You were blown away by the fact that your friend had helped to choreograph such a difficult piece, and was also able to pull it off perfectly.

“Thanks! I can’t wait for the symphonic band’s performance as well. Especially your piccolo solo, I loved it so much,” he comments as your face heats up a little.

“Thanks, I’ll do my best!” you say, looking up at him and doing the “fighting” gesture.

“The year is ending so fast, don’t you think?” Shotaro asks, looking up. Ahead, the sky is painted with pinks, purples and oranges of every hue, a sight for sore eyes indeed. Yet, you find your eyes being drawn to your best friend.

“It is,” you say. “Before you know it, we’ll be in our final year of high school,” you answer, the reality of everything seeping through like blood on a white garment.

“I hope that the friend group will stay together, I really love everyone there,” Shotaro admits, eyes glistening a little as the sad possibility of the friend group separating runs through his mind. “We’re all planning to study different college courses and we might not see each other anymore”.

“Nah, I bet Hyuck will initiate a meetup as soon as he gets the chance,” you say. Most of the meetups the friend group had had been planned by Donghyuck, being the extrovert he was. If there was any hope for the friend group to stay together, it would be Donghyuck. “However busy he is, he’ll definitely plan something. Mark my words”.

“Yeah, he will,” Shotaro finally lets out a sigh of relief. “At least there’s still hope for the group to meet up again. “I know I’ll definitely see you around, though”. He turns to you, hope reflecting in his gaze.

“We’re neighbours, after all. And plus, Cloud, Jake and Pebble are gonna wanna see each other,” you reply honestly, giving Cloud a sip from a water bottle. You wouldn’t admit this to him out loud, but you’d feel like a part of you would be gone if you both stopped meeting up.

“I’m glad I’ll still see you around,” he says as he wraps his arms around your shoulders. You subconsciously return the hug, relaxing in his grip. Sure, the hug felt a little longer than those you’d usually give each other, but neither of you complained, staying in each other’s hold until it was time to go home.

»»————-----------------------　♡　-----------------------————-««

Time continues to fly by, and soon the New Year’s Countdown has arrived. The symphonic band had just delivered their performance and received a standing ovation, much to your pleasant surprise. You, Renjun and Donghyuck return to the picnic mat that you and your friends had laid out on the grass as Xiaojun returns to the stage.

“That was an outstanding performance by NCIT Symphonic Band! Next, we have NCIT Dance Club, bringing us a piece titled ‘New Beginnings’. Let’s put our hands together to welcome them!” he recites off his cue cards, before walking off again as the lights dim.

The lights come on again, revealing the dancers on stage in their starting positions. Though there are so many of them, your eyes immediately locate Shotaro, standing at the left side of the formation. “Shotaro! Jaemin! Jeno! Yangyang!” you and your friends cheer as loudly as you can for your friends who are onstage, so much that you thought your lungs would explode. You only quiet down when the dancers start. Though your other three friends were amazing, for some reason, your eyes keep being drawn to Shotaro as he dances with both the grace of a swan and the power of a deer. The three of you are unable to hold back your cheers when the other dancers move to the side of the stage, leaving Shotaro onstage as he begins his solo, executing his moves cleanly as he exudes confidence and charisma. You’re so enchanted by his every move that you’re positive that you didn’t breathe for the entire solo.

All too soon, his performance draws to a close, and the audience gives the dancers a thunderous round of applause. “Yo y/n, my parents are looking for us. We’ll be back!” Renjun informs as he and Donghyuck get up and leave the mat.

“Alright, see you later!” you answer, thinking nothing about it.

A few minutes later, Shotaro arrives. “You guys were amazing!” you immediately gush as he sits down beside you. “Your solo was amazing!”

“Thank you,” he says quietly, happiness radiating off his smile. In that instant, you feel your heart flutter again.

That’s when you register that Yangyang, Jeno and Jaemin are nowhere to be seen. “Where are the others?” you ask Shotaro.

He shrugs. “Don’t know. Said they’ll join us soon though”.

“Alright then,” you answer and turn back to face the stage.

The programme progresses, but you’re barely focusing on it. For some reason, three words kept echoing in your mind, distracting you from the performances in front of you. Words that you wanted to say to Shotaro so badly. They were always hanging off the tip of your tongue, yet you sorely lacked the courage to say them to him. What if I ruin what we already have? This thought haunted you like a monster that lurked in the depths of your mind. It only appeared whenever you had made up your mind to tell him how you felt, effectively breaking down all the confidence and composure you'd spent days, even weeks, building up.

Plus, next year will be the final year in high school for both of you, meaning a heavier workload as teachers scramble to arm students with knowledge for the final exams, hoping for them to get into their dream universities. You didn't know if you both could commit to a relationship now, considering the workload to come. So much to think about…

"y/n? You've been quiet, you alright?" Shotaro's soft, sweet voice brings you back to the real world.

Shaking your head gently to bring yourself out of your daze, you turn to him and whisper, "I'm fine, I was just thinking about something". He then nods and turns back to the stage where the emcees are waiting for the final countdown.

"y/n...there's actually something I want to tell you". Shotaro speaks up from next to you.

"Hmm?" you hum, still distracted by your train of thought.

"I...I really like you. W-wait, nevermind, scratch that, l-love you. Like, non platonically love you”.

Your heart skips a beat, and your head snaps in his direction. Your eyes behold the sight of a very flustered Shotaro, his cheeks tinted a shade of pink. "Wait, can you repeat that?" You reckon that your eyes must be as wide as grapefruits, but you don't care.

"I love you," he repeats, with more confidence this time. "It took so long for me to realise. But even after I did, I was so afraid to tell you, y/n".

You look down, trying to hide the blush creeping up your own cheeks as well.

"I didn't realise how I felt towards you. But when we spent more time together through volunteering, studying together and just hanging out, that's when I realised that I felt more than just platonic attraction to you. I was so afraid to confess, because I always feared ruining the many years of pure friendship we've had". Shotaro rambles on like a bullet train, mumbling so fast you can barely hear him. "And I was afraid of getting my heart broken again…" he adds, remembering the pain of his first ever relationship, which ended in lots of tears and pain for him.

"Shotaro…" your voice trails off.

"It's fine if you don't feel the same way towards me, y/n. I just wanted to get my feelings off my chest. Thanks for hearing me out". He says, before looking away from you slightly and blinking a couple of times.

"No, Shotaro, hear me out". After his brave confession, it was your turn to tell him how you felt too. "I love you too".

He turns back to you quickly, eyes holding the tiniest hint of hope. "I've had a growing crush on you since school reopened after the holidays, but I didn't dare to tell you how I felt," you chuckle, realising that you both were stuck in the same situation. "I feared destroying our friendship too".

"So...we're in the same boat, huh". He responds after a silence that seemed to last for eternity.

"Yeah…" you look down, lost for more words. "So now that we know how we feel towards each other...do you wanna...perhaps give things a try?" you blurt out, before facepalming mentally.

"But...we're going to be preparing for our finals next year, and there'll be so much more to do. We'll be focusing on our studies, I'm not sure if we'll have time…" Shotaro trailed off, an uncertain tone lacing his words.

You silently mull over what Shotaro said, knowing that you were thinking of the same thing, and that he had a point. Yet, in your heart, the tiniest voice was nudging you to just give it a try. It was as if some angel was reassuring you that the heavens would take care of it, and that destiny was now taking its due course. "Like someone wise once said, it's much easier when you've got someone by your side. Sure, we might be busier than ever, but we'll have each other, right?" you speak up, looking up at him hopefully. "We've made it since childhood as the closest of friends through thick and thin, I'm sure we can go further as lovers as well".

Shotaro giggles hearing his own words being quoted to him. "Then let's go for it". He agrees, turning back to look at you. "I believe we can do it if we try. So...be mine?" He gazes at you, eyes glimmering with hope.

You smile wider than ever, so wide that you could probably eat a whole banana sideways in one bite. "I'd love to," you respond.

His eyes adorably form crescent moons again. "May I…?"

You already know what he wants. "Yes, you may".

With that, his hand travels to the back of your head, and he pulls you in for a sweet kiss as a spectacular display of fireworks makes its way onto the star-studded night sky, marking the start of a new year, which would mean new responsibilities for the both of you. But none of you held fear in your hearts, only pure love for each other, because for you and Shotaro, you knew you'd have each other as the fireworks also marked a new chapter of your journey together, this time as something more than friends.

»»————-----------------------　♡　-----------------------————-««

if you made it all the way here, thank you so much! i hope you enjoyed it, have a nice day :D

tagging: @bangchan-fairy @moonsclover

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