#sibsans

[imaginaryboyfriendsans]

()^% "Hmm acid with attitude... acid, acid, first thing that comes to mind are amino aci-" They pause for a moment before face-palming. They were snickering with a large smile on their face. "A-mean-o acid." They began to laugh out loud. "That was sodium funny! A real neon slapper!" ~Rosy

*Both Science, Mob, and Reaper are cackling. Reaper looks at Science as mob covers his face*

Science- man, it looks like she’s really killing ya reaper. 

*more laughter and Mob is literally bent over leaning on his knees* 

Mob- shit, darlin’ that was hilarious. *he stands back up and grins* quite the pistol isn’t she?

[imaginaryboyfriendsans]

* a potato slides into your dms * hey boys. Had a rough day and is look for some comfort. Anyone game?

((Oh shit, okay, guess I get to bring out the big guns. Let’s get everybody who’s been on this blog up in this joint. Guys if you want to talk to all the boys, make it simple because WHOOO this is gonna be one long ass post. -Mod K))

Classic- heh hey sweetheart, tell us what happened. we’re all here for ya.

Fell- y-yeah, ya definitely ain’t alone in this. we’re all here to support ya.

Swap- OF COURSE, IF YOU NEED ANYTHING WE’LL HAPPILY–

SwapFell- MURDER WHOMEVER HAS TROUBLED YOU.

Reaper- well… i mean that might kill me, i mean my job does work me to death. *he chuckles* seriously though, i’m new to being able to touch people.. but.. i’ll happily cuddle you and try to make you feel better.

Mob- hey kitten, howzabout we go curl up somewhere and talk about what’s goin’ on?

G- heh yeah baby, i’m more than happy to be there for you in every way *he winks at you*

Cheshire- i could certainly annoy the person to death, oooor we could lay somewhere and relax. i’ve been told i’m quite comfortable and an excellent listener when the mood strikes.~

Scientist- are you alright my little proton? what seems to be the problem? 

Bara- hey honey, you need a hug? i’ve been told i’m really warm and cuddly, though i think you’re going to have to pretty much lay on me. 

Novella- hola mi amor. estoy más que feliz de consolarte. ven aquí y te sostendré en mis brazos mientras me cuentes tus aflicciones. podemos acurrucarnos y relajarnos juntos.

(hello my love. i am more than happy to comfort you. come here and I will hold you in my arms while you tell me your afflictions. we can cuddle and relax together.)

Outertale- hey there my shining star, why don’t we lay down, and star gaze? the atmosphere might make you feel better. *he winks as well* 

Ink- Hey there sweetheart! What can I do to make you feel better? I’m more than happy to spend time with you. If you want, we could draw together and talk about it? Of course we can cuddle too, it’s whatever you need.

((choose your guy! -Mod K))

[imaginaryboyfriendsans]

# Um, hi! I've been reading this blog for a long, long while, it's actually why I got a tumblr! I was wondering if I could talk to US!Sans? He's always been my little ball of sunshine, and I wanted to thank him for being there for me.

YOU CAN ALWAYS TALK TO ME DEARHEART! WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO TALK ABOUT? YOUR EYES, YOUR LOVELY VOICE, YOU IN GENERAL? *he wraps you up in a hug and picks you up, spinning you around before setting you down* I AM MAGNIFICENT, BUT YOU ARE JUST AS MAGNIFICENT IF NOT MORE. *he kisses your cheek before taking both of your hands* NO NEED TO THANK ME, MY DEAR. I LOVE YOU AND I AM MORE THAN HAPPY TO BE AT YOUR SIDE.

[imaginaryboyfriendsans]

# Swap!Sans? I... I really need some comfort... I'm looking for a new apartment right now as I can't keep living in the one I've got right now because I don't have a education, and that's not bad but... I called my dad, who I'm worried for because he's had a car accident and broke three ribs, but once he heard that I'd gotten written out... He just started lecturing me about what I should have done! And I... I just wish he wasn't like that... I love my dad, but I just... Wish I could talk to him

OF COURSE, DEARHEART! WHATEVER YOU NEED, I AM HERE FOR YOU AS YOUR MAGNIFICENT BOYFRIEND. *he pulls you in for a hug and continues to hold you while he smiles at you. He listens intently as you tell him your story. His face falls a bit as he falls into thought* MY SWEET, I BELIEVE HE IS JUST WORRIED ABOUT YOU. I CAN RELATE, I WANT YOU TO BE HAPPY AND COMFORTABLE JUST LIKE HIM. THOUGH… HE SEEMS TO MISUNDERSTAND. YOU’RE SAFE AND HAPPY ARE YOU NOT? YOU HAVE A HOME AND A LIFE, WHAT MORE DO YOU NEED? *he gently kisses your forehead* I AM PROUD OF YOU, MY DEAR, AND I DO BELIEVE IT WILL BE ALRIGHT. IF YOU NEED CUDDLES JUST BRING ME FORTH AND BE PREPARED FOR THE MOST MAGNIFICENT CUDDLES!

[imaginaryboyfriendsans]

((Someone said Mob was the only IB Sans in the cast who would literally kill someone for his datemate. So here’s some imaginary (turned real) Sanses’ reactions to “I need you to kill someone for me.”))

Classic: whoa, sweetheart, i’ve never seen ya this upset before! who did this to you? any way i can help?

…how about a way that doesn’t involve murder first?

Swaps: your knight in shining armor shall vanquish any foe of yours, my sans-tastic datemate! where can i find this fiend?

…wait, you actually want me to kill them???

Fell: now THAT’S somethin’ i’m used to! but i don’t know if i’ll do much damage, bein’ a 1 HPer and all.

…they WHAT?!

FORGET THE 1 HP! I’M GOIN’ OVER THERE RIGHT NOW!

Gaster: easy there, babe! how are we gonna date if i’m in jail?

Cheshire: i’m afraid murder is a tad outside my profession. but if you want, i could annoy them to death!

Reaper: kid, just because i'm the grim reaper doesn’t mean i can kill someone before their time comes. sorry to disappoint ya.

Science: just because i have poisonous chemicals doesn’t mean we should use them to poison. what exactly did this person do?

Mob: they hurt ya?

…just say the name, and it’s done.

[imaginaryboyfriendsans]

(Thank you for answering my asks, lovely mun!) I can't choose any of the Sanses, so I'll go with all! Hi there, guys, I'm Anna and I just wanna say I love you all! *throws red roses at all the Sanses*

Underswap: *jumps up and catches rose* thanks, cutie! we all love you, too!

Underfell: *dodges rose out of habit* hey, don’t speak for ALL of us, swap. isn’t it too early to say that?

Classic: *casually extends arm to catch rose* she just said she loves us, and we’re designed to love her. so why not?

*The other Sanses each receive their rose, some of them catching perfectly…*

Undernovela: gracias, mi amor.

*…others not so lucky.*

Science Sans: interesting reaction. *rose lands in a vial of unknown chemical, making it erupt with fog*

Reaper: thanks! *rose wilts* oh.

*Meanwhile, Underfell and Classic continue their conversation.*

Underfell: i just think it’s a little crowded, is all. can’t sense a whole lotta love.

Classic: if we do it right, we’ll soon be overflowing with love.

Underfell: yeah, but…am i…?

Classic: …you’re worried she’s not going to notice you if she’s too busy talking to the rest of us?

Underfell: no! i mean… *looks down* kinda.

Classic: aw, underfell, she loves you just as much as she loves the rest of us. you just gotta show yourself to her. *looks around* listen, i got an idea. *whisper whisper*

Underfell: what? i’m not doin’ that!

Classic: she’ll think it’s cute!

Underfell: *crosses arms* i’m not cute!

Classic: you’re an imaginary boyfriend. we’re all cute!

Underfell: i…i guess, but…*sighs* fine!

*Underfell walks over to a spare rose, fallen on the ground without a recipient. He picks it up, feeling the prick of a thorn in the process…*

Underfell: ow!

*…and brings it to you. He holds it out.*

Underfell: i…*turns his head away* there was an extra.

[imaginaryboyfriendsans]

Sup (science) sans do you have 11 protons? Cus your sodium fine ;D I find you adorable *kisses his cheek bone*

*rubs cheek* maybe i have eleven protons, but i’m missing a few electrons. do you have them?

because i’m finding myself attracted to you!

…ya see, when an atom has too few electrons, it’s positively charged, and when it has too many electrons, it’s positively charged, and positive and negative charges are– oh, forget it.

you’re much more adorable than i am!