When Catherine sang, she didn't see him. She saw herself as a young woman, fresh out of Durham House and hurling into the arms of Henry VIII.
Packed my bags/And moved into a Nu-nu-nunnery!
She should have known right then and there that her new husband wouldn't, couldn't, love her the way he should've. She should've known right then and there that the convent would've been kinder to her than the castle.
Joined the gospel choir/Our riffs were on fire
When she sang, she gave herself something new, something she deserved. She never wanted a divorce. She only wanted to live in a way worthy of her station and to raise her daughter well.
At the top of the charts/Is where I'm gonna stay
When she sang, she sang for salvation.
-
Henry sent me a poem/All about my green sleeves
When Anne sang, the guilt and heartache washed off her in waves. She stopped seeing her own head in a basket and felt hope take its place, bright and burning in her heart.
I changed a couple words/Put it on a sick beat
She wished she could give her younger self the knowledge she had now, that a life with Henry, however brief, would not make her happy. She only hoped that her daughter learned that before she did.
The song blew their minds/Next minute I was signed
When she sang, she gave herself a do over, separate from her past mistakes. She denied Henry a place in her heart and instead took her life in her own hands.
And now I'm writing lyrics/For Shakesy P
When she sang, she sang for freedom.
-
Since my first son/Our family's grown
When Jane sang, she saw her infant son, tiny and screaming in her arms. Her son, who she only got to know for 12 days before her death.
We made a band/And got quite well known
She reached out a hand to cup his chin, suddenly seeing her little baby as a young man. She savored that face, the one sitting under nearly 3 pounds of sparkling gems. This was what she had wanted with Henry, and this was what she had been denied.
You could perhaps call us/The Tudor Von Trapps
When she sang, she gave herself a family and the strength to know that she was the best she could have been. No matter when she died, she did her damn best, and she couldn’t ask anything more of herself.
I'm just kidding/We're called the Royalling Stones
When she sang, she sang for the life she should've had.
-
What a shame/Yeah, my face/It cost me the crown
When Anna sang, she saw that stupid portrait, the one responsible for her life trajectory since that idiot king looked at it and saw a pretty, docile young girl. Sure, it made her look beautiful, but what good was beauty in this world?
So I moved to the/Haus Of Holbein!/In my hometown
In her mind's eye, she slashed through the pretty canvas with her finger nails and turned to Henry, pointer finger accusatory and dripping malice. She never should have gotten on that boat to England, and she probably wouldn’t have if she’d been given the choice to not.
His mates were super arty/But I showed them how to party
When she sang, she put herself right back in Germany where she wanted to be all along. She would never deny that her life post crown was fabulous and resplendent, but she didn't need that. She needed passion, and something to care about, though that palace in Richmond was pretty damn great.
Now on my tour of Prussia/Everybody "Gets down"
When she sang, she sang for independence.
-
Music man tried it on/And I was like "Bye!"
When Katherine sang, she saw her 12 year old self, eyes still big and naive to the ways of the world. Even now, she was sad to admit those same eyes were drawn to the abject beauty of that child, the beauty that would cause her immense grief before her 20th birthday.
So I thought "Who needs him?/I can give it a try"
Now, she raged against the adults that had allowed that little girl to be abused so horribly for so long and then told her it was her own fault. She screamed and cried and tried to live her life on her own terms now that she had that choice.
I learned everything
When she sang, she stopped the grief before it could start. She may not have been able to change her own past, but she could damn well give that little girl something to live for.
Now all I do is sing/And I'll do that until I die
When she sang, she sang for the little girl she should've been.
-
Heard all about these rockin' chicks
When Catherine sang, she saw herself at the altar of all four of her husbands, and she felt the combined dread of each day she was forced to be tied to men who didn't deserve her.
Loved every song/And each remix
She was a published author, for god's sake, but a young, eligible woman such as herself couldn't exist for long without being snatched up by inferior men with more power than her lest she be cast from society.
So I went out and found them/And we laid down an album
When she sang, she gave herself the dignity and independence she earned through hard work. All she ever wanted was to write and maybe make life easier for the women who came after her because no one should have to go through what she and the other five queens went through.
Beheaded!Catherine Parr, Stress cooking, Nightmares, Blood (not as bad as it sounds), Angsty but not really, platonic everyone, Except Aragon and Boleyn who are shoving their tongues down each other's throats in the background, also Cathy has a crush but, Mentioning the fact Cathy was a teen when Anne became queen bcus funny
↳ Catherine Parr, Catherine of Aragon, Kathryn Howard, Anne Boleyn, Anna of Cleves, Jane Seymour
𝐀𝐨𝟑
7.741 words
Hey there! Here is the long awaited Beheaded!Cathy fic before i get into it i wanted to talk a bit cause hey <3 this is technically a sequel to LiSL, but that was written a WHILE ago, and a lot of my hcs, dynamics, how i write, etc. Have changed. Like the switch from established clevemour to crushing clevarr. So all you really need to know is that Cathy lied about surviving and was beheaded, which the queens found out in said previous fic.
Other then that, thanks for sharing even slightly in my hype for this fic, this is the longest fic i have written in a WHILE and there will be surely be more to come. This isn't that in depth on the situation, but if this is well received i will write some side pieces, this fic got long very quickly so i had to end it somewhere adafj
But anyway, enjoy! Also please remember to reblog and/or leave some kind words <3 i worked really hard on this and it'd be nice/nf
Catherine Parr woke up at 2 A.M.
Their chest heaved as they shot to find their heartbeat. It was dark, they didn't yell. They weren't sure they could.
Their hands found their heart, beating. Thankfully. Rapid, a rhythm that seemed out of tune.
There was an ache at their neck, beating like their heart. But this hurt, it hurt a lot. Shame burnt at the back of their mind as they subconsciously brought their hands up to scratch at it.
Even when the thick blood started oozing from the scar, they scratched. They should stop, they knew they should. But they couldn't.
Whether it was the dissociation or the other being quiet. Cathy only realized someone had entered their room when their wrists were grabbed.
The woman flinched, labored breaths leaving them as they fought against whoever was trying to hold them down.
In an instant their mind returned to years ago, begging for their life and struggling against the guards. They were saying something, it didn't matter, it didn't. Catherine needed to talk to the king, they could still save this.
Catherine gasped when they were pushed down, finding their breath taken from them.
They weren't pushed to a hard ground, rather to a soft surface, had they been forgiven? Had it all been a dream? They could recognize it as a bed, they didn't know imprisonment would have such soft beds.
It didn't.
Cathy took in greedy breaths as their senses returned to them, what had been blur in front of them becoming a clear image and the distortion of sound becoming a clear hushing and humming.
Jane, it was Jane pinning them down to the bed.
Jane was humming a tune to calm the other down, which Cathy immediately recognized as Jane's song in the show. They did mention really liking the song, hadn't they?
Cathy's fists unclenched as they calmed, attempting to squirm enough to let Jane know they'd gotten their senses back.
The third queen seemed to get the hint, letting go of Cathy's wrists to sit next to them.
"You okay?" Jane asked, gently rubbing at their knee. Cathy raised a brow, getting themselves up.
"Yeah, fine. I could've.. dealt with it." Cathy tried, not daring to meet Jane's gaze.
Jane huffed, an amused but kind and concerned smile crossing her features. "I can see that." She gestured to Cathy's neck. Cathy grimaced.
The wound they caused wasn't big and not fatal, Jane had gotten in before they could do any real damage, but it was bleeding. Not rapidly or like they would drown in their own blood. More like a wound you'd get when falling on your knees as a child.
Still it felt uncomfortable, and it stung horribly. It took everything in them not to get up and scratch at it again. The ache hadn't subsided either.
Jane seemed to notice where their mind had headed, giving a ruffle to their hair to shake them from their thoughts. "Lina's getting a towel and some bandages." She reassured.
Cathy managed a small smile.
"Wait, Lina? Wait shit, did I wake you up? Did I wake all of you up? I'm so sorry I didn't mean to! I didn't even scream! God i can't even not fuck up on just not waking people up, i'm so sorry i-"
"Catherine Parr!"
Cathy snapped up to meet Jane's gaze.
"Do not spiral on my watch like that! First of all, me and Lina were already awake and heard you start panicking. Before you ask, we were awake purely because we couldn't sleep. Second of all, Cathy, it would not be a problem if you woke any of us up, not even if you woke all of us up. You deserve your comfort too."
Cathy couldn't bring themself to respond.
It wasn't that much longer until Catalina entered the room, holding more than Cathy had expected.
"Okay, so i have the obvious, the towel and bandages, but i have some snacks, pain killers, that poem book you said you liked and a collection of bandaids from that show you watch to add some color to the bandages." Catalina rambled as she sat down next to her goddaughter, showing off the items as she listed them. Cathy was almost impressed.
"Oh there's also this thing I forgot the name of to make sure the wound doesn't get infected." Catalina showed off the small bottle. Cathy raised a brow.
"Disinfector?"
"That's the bitch."
Cathy couldn't press back a smile.
Catalina got Cathy to turn towards her while Jane held back their hair. "This might hurt." She warned, though she supposes the younger would already know that. She dabbed the towel where the blood was before wiping it clean with the part she'd wet.
It stung, horribly so, it took everything Cathy not to scream at the sensations at their neck. It didn't get any better when Catalina added the disinfectant in the mix.
Cathy hissed as Catalina worked the wound. Jane was holding their hand and squeezing to keep them grounded. Both women whispered soft reassurances to the last wife, who had started bouncing their leg at the overstimulating pain.
When Catalina finally finished and turned to grab the bandages did Cathy start calming down. There was still an incredible sting at their neck, but the removal of active movement was a significant change.
Catalina gently cooed, cupping their cheek. "Almost done, querida. Don't worry." She tried a reassuring smile, which Cathy tried their very best to return.
Cathy's breathing picked up as Catalina wrapped the bandage around their neck, being as gentle as she possibly could be. Jane continued with humming her song as gently played with Cathy's hair in an attempt to keep them in the twenty-first century.
Logically it had been a few minutes at most, but Cathy felt like it took hours for the bandages to be finished. Tears stung at the corners of their eyes, small pained whines leaving them as they relaxed their ever aching neck.
The two other women's hearts broke at the sound, Jane combing through Cathy's curls gently in an attempt at comfort. "The pain will be over soon, chiquitita." Catalina assured, turning to give Cathy a band-aid of choice like she promised.
It felt incredibly childish to Cathy, and a small blush arose to their cheeks as they chose. Their godmother gave an amused smile at Cathy's embarrassment, but did nothing more as she gently placed it on the side of their neck.
The three sat in silence for a few moments, the only sound in the room being Jane's humming.
"Has this happened before?"
Cathy turned to Jane. "What? The nightmares?" They asked, a brow raised.
Jane chuckled, her hand never ceasing with the comforting motions. "No.. i know those happen. But.. you hurting yourself like this when you woke up from one.. has that happened before?" She mused, her gaze soft.
Cathy froze, before curling in on themself. "Yes." They responded, bringing up their hand to bite at their nails. "I just dealt with it. At some point i'd get grounded by some random noise outside or something. Then i'd just clean it off in the bathroom and pretend it never happened. Never got a new scar from it, though."
The other two listened carefully, both giving eachother a concerned look at the end.
"I do wish you'd told us earlier, or just.. didn't lie about it at all." Catalina tried to sound a little like she was joking, it hadn't worked, she noted as Cathy curled further in on themself.
"I don't know why i did it, honestly. Or.. how i even managed it." Cathy chuckled. "I.. suppose i.. felt like my beheading was a failure. I'd so carefully planned out everything so i'd get out of that marriage alive. And it.. didn't work." They explained as best as they could.
"Of course that.. beheading thing being a failure only applied to me, and not the cousins." Cathy added with a small smile.
Jane hummed in thought. "Wouldn't Anna have known?" She asked.
Cathy had to think for a moment. "I asked her about it recently. After Kate's beheading she didn't keep up much with the news from the English royal family, atleast until Henry died. So she just didn't get word of it. She'd heard people speaking of a beheading, but she never looked into who it was." They took in a breath.
"Besides that, it isn't like Anna particularly liked me back then. Which honestly you wouldn't say now. But i can completely forgive her for just caring so little she forgot. If that had been the case." Cathy giggled, what had clearly been a joke to them only making the other two wince in concern.
"No one really spoke of it after the fact i suppose, didn't stand out that much from you guys since i was basically more a nurse then i was a wife." They shrugged.
Catalina sighed, deciding to put the next Parr issue that was surfacing from the depths in her mind for tomorrow. It was late and frankly they needed sleep.
She smiled, taking Cathy's hand in her own. "Well, how about we talk about this tomorrow? You've had a hectic night and i think it's about time we get back to sleep." Cathy winced. Something which didn't go unnoticed.
"What if-" Cathy tried, though Jane quickly cut them off.
"If you get any nightmares we will be right here, ready to do all of this over again." She assured, holding Cathy's other hand.
Cathy wanted to retort, but found themselves unable to argue. It did seem rather nice to have them spend the night.
Catalina chuckled, clearly knowing it. "Well, how about you make use of those pain killers, and i'll get that poem book ready, yeah?" Her voice was kind and soft, and the thought of being read to made a second round of blush spring to Cathy's cheeks. But they nodded either way.
….
Cathy couldn't say they were surprised when the two women were still in their room by morning.
They'd woken rather peacefully, not having any bad nightmares that night anymore. They found that Catalina was already awake the moment they'd opened their eyes. Their head had been moved to rest on her lap so that she could sit comfortably while reading.
Jane was still sound asleep, keeping Parr stuck in a hug.
Catalina hummed, shutting her book when she realized her goddaughter had woken up.
"Good morning, sleeping beauty." She smiled, gently playing with their curls. "I would ask if you want breakfast, but it seems you're a little trapped." She giggled, gesturing towards the arms wrapped around their waist.
Cathy smiled. "I'm sure she'll wake up soon."
"Anything happened yet?" They asked. Catalina thought for a moment.
"The others came to check up on us, other than that nothing has happened." She responded.
"Did you tell them what happened?" The younger asked, bringing them self up as much as they could with Jane clinging to them. Catalina smiled.
"Not in detail, I just told them you had a nightmare so we stayed the night." Cathy smiled at the answer, they weren't sure they'd forgive themself if the other cousins heard of them hurting themself like that.
"They wouldn't mind you know." Catalina quickly said. "They care just as much about your well being as you do theirs."
Cathy raised a brow, an amused grin on their features. "How did you know i was thinking about that?" They asked.
Catalina laughed. "You're like an open book! Honestly Mi Amor, you're pretty easy to read, especially in the morning."
"I lied about my beheading to you. For two years."
Catalina shoved them aside playfully, rolling her eyes. But a smile reached her when Cathy laughed in response.
…..
Much like Cathy had suspected, It didn't take much longer for Jane to wake up, craving her breakfast.
And it didn't take much longer for all the inhabitants of the house to come down for breakfast.
The ladies had started up their own conversation, which Maggie then somehow dragged Anne into. Jane had given herself the task of making everyone's breakfast and Anna had wrapped Catalina in a heated discussion about a new game she had found.
Which left Cathy and Kate.
Who were just sitting there.
Quietly.
Before the truth had come out, Kate had her thoughts about Cathy's 'almost' beheading. Sure the other women were several levels of pissed, but Kate was furious. She honestly hadn't thought much about why she was so mad, but she was.
This had worsened when she learned that the almost beheading had been a lie. And they'd actually gotten beheaded.
She'd jokingly praised Cathy for her lying skills after the fact, and tried her best to cool off after it but she couldn't.
She, first of all, couldn't believe Cathy would lie about something like that, but she also supposed they had their own reasons she wouldn't probe in until they allowed it.
She'd also gotten extremely protective of them.
There must've been a reason they were afraid to tell the truth right? And Kate knew it had something to do with a differing opinion.
(Cathy once again found themself in a discussion, 'someone who attended the show talking shit again' they'd explained later.
Kate couldn't help herself, she overheard the whole thing. She could barely stop herself from giggling at how hard Cathy was kicking this guy's ass.
"Well, it's just that i think-"
"The last time you thought for yourself you almost got killed."
Kate had never stepped out to defend someone so fast.
She quickly came out from her hiding spot. Startling both Cathy and the man they'd been talking to.
Cathy looked around to where the other could have come from, confusion in their eyes.
"What? Kate where-?"
"You should leave." Kate spoke up, looking the man straight in the eyes, and stepping behind Cathy.
"With all due respect we were just having a discussion."
Kate shook her head. "That didn't sound like a normal discussion."
Before the man could retort, she continued. "Don't be a dick. Leave them alone."
The man groaned, but did as he was told, heading straight to the door.
Cathy looked up, Kate's gaze immediately softening at catching the other's eyes. "..Thank you"
"I.. You're welcome.")
In some sense, Kate blamed herself. In a similar way to how Anna blamed herself for Kate's beheading. Barely being able to look Cathy in the eye.
The fifth wife was snapped out of her thoughts as Jane handed her her breakfast, at which point she realized everyone had sat down at the table.
She'd talk to Anna later.
…
It was about 2 P.M when Anne walked into a kitchen filled with treats and sweets.
She'd decided to come down, a snack would go well with her reading. But her plans changed as soon as she walked in and saw several plates full of them.
"Jane?" She called, the kitchen was full of evidence that Jane had been there. But Jane was nowhere to be found.
"Oh! Anne, do you want something?" Came Jane's cheery voice from behind her. Anne whipped around, smiling at her softly.
"Yeah, well. Originally- Are you okay?"
Jane tensed for a second, before smiling and going back to her spot to work further on her treats. "I'm fine, why do you ask?"
Anne grimaced. "Jane, you're stress baking." She responded softly.
"Oh."
Jane stopped, staring blankly in front of her.
"Cathy hurt themself last night." She said. Anne wasn't exactly sure if she realized she did.
"When they woke up from their nightmare. They started scratching at their neck and they were bleeding, Anne they were bleeding, lord it felt horrible." Jane rambled.
Anne quickly scrambled over towards her, taking her into a one-sided hug.
"I wondered how long they've been doing that. And we just didn't know. Anne oh my god. Anne, I'm so sorry." Jane started trying to hold back tears, her voice wavering in the process.
"It just reminded me so much of you and Kate. And i'm so sorry i got into the affair with Henry. I caused your death Anne. I'm so sorry." The third wife cried, hugging Anne back.
Anne barely knew what to say, so instead she settled for rubbing Jane's back as she sobbed.
"It's alright, Jane you're alright." She assured, still processing everything that she was told.
Jane quieted down into quiet sniffles as Anne collected her thoughts, deciding what to say next.
Anne swallowed. "You know, the world has a funny way of working."
Jane looked up in confusion.
"If it had not been you, it would have been someone else. Fate and such." She smiled when she got a small chuckle out of her cousin. "But seriously, if anything i am glad it was you, and nobody else. I would have never forgiven someone else."
Anne smiled softly, meeting Jane's gaze. "You're a wonderful person, and you are fully deserving of my forgiveness." She assured, patting Jane's back.
"And as for Cathy, what they did was wrong. But i do fully believe they are also deserving of our forgiveness. There's definitely an underlying issue waiting to get dug up." She chuckled.
Jane hummed, swaying in her cousin's hold. "They talked a bit about it last night." Anne perked up.
"Really?"
"They said they felt like it was a personal failure. They also, just to clear them, said that the thought of the beheading being a failure only applied to them. And not you or Kate. It's not much of a reason. But it's an insight."
Anne giggled. "At least it's a start."
Jane smiled, nodding in agreement.
"You know.. it's really been hard to trust their word on things recently." The third wife whispered. Anne hummed.
"Yeah, i get where you're coming from. I know they aren't like that. But something in me is screaming 'if they lie about something like that, what else could they be lying about', you know?" She responded.
Jane chuckled, nodding. "It's just.. hard. I know they aren't the type to lie about random things. But if they lied about their literal head getting chopped off.." She trailed off.
"And it ranges from small things. Like me not being sure if i believe their 'i'm not hungry' when i ask if they want a snack. To wanting to know if there's something their holding back when they talk about their past." Jane continued, biting her nails.
Anne nodded. "Same here, i just wonder if there's more to it." She smiled softly. "I'm sure they'll tell us more, when they're ready."
"I hope so."
…
A knock on her door awoke Anna from her trance, setting down the sketchbook she'd been working on.
"Come in!"
The door opened and in came a very tense looking Kathryn Howard. She walked over to the bed, sitting on the edge.
Anna raised a brow, turning her chair around to face her. "What's up, Katze?" She asked, rolling over to sit a little closer.
"I just.. i wanna talk about Cathy." Kate responded, fidgeting. Anna raised a curious brow.
"Okay..? And what do you wanna talk about concerning Cathy?" She asked, her voice soft as ever.
"Do you think i'm at fault for their beheading?"
Anna was taken aback, staring at the younger woman in front of her.
"No! Why would you think that?"
Kate looked around the room, wearily. She was clearly tired. "It's just.. if- had i.. if i had survived a little longer just enough for Cathy to marry their Thomas.. he couldn't hurt them." She responded, blurting out all her feelings before she could decide it was a bad idea.
Anna quickly reached for Kate's hand, shaking her out of her emotional state.
"Kate, what happened to Cathy was horrible. But what happened to you is also horrible. You had no control over your situation and shouldn't blame yourself. Henry was horrible. Mannox, Dereham and especially Culpepper. Were horrible people. And what they did to you is unforgivable. And most importantly, not your fault."
Kate nodded, wiping away stray tears. "I've learned that.. and in some way i only partially blame me. I mostly blame Henry, of course. And i blame Thomas." Anna nodded, gently helping with wiping away the younger's tears.
"Hey, Katze. Can i tell you a secret?" Anna smiled gently. Kate seemed confused, but nodded.
"Cathy came to me too, before the house of cards fell down." She chuckled. "You know what for?"
Kate shook her head, curiosity filling her eyes.
"They came for the same advice you came for. They blamed themself for your beheading." Anna said, Kate backing up in temporary shock.
"Do you blame them, Kate?"
"No!"
Anna smiled, pulling Kate into a hug. "Then they won't blame you either."
Kate hesitated, but returned the hug with her own smile.
"You should talk to them, it'd give you some clarity." Anna added as Kate let go of her. The younger nodded, wiping away remaining tears.
"I'll talk to them soon, i need a bit. Thanks."
Anna grinned, patting Kate's knee before she stood up to leave. "You're welcome!"
And with the slam of the door, Anna happily went back to her sketchbook.
…
Cathy had always felt guilt and shame swell deep inside their stomach whenever anything in the musical mentioned them surviving. This feeling had only gotten worse after the word had gotten out to the other queens.
They'd found themself rushing off the stage after the megasix, ignoring the concerned looks they got from everyone. They always changed as quickly as they could, so the silence that filled theirs and Anna's dressing room wouldn't choke them.
Today was no different. Well it was, in the essence that when they'd gotten into the dressing room they felt incredibly tired and instead of starting to undress, quietly sat in their chair.
It only took Anna a few more seconds before entering as well, taking in Cathy's position before moving to sit next to them.
The fourth wife started tugging her costume off, while the sixth merely sat there.
"I suppose you don't want to do stage door?" Anna asked, a small grin on her face. Cathy looked up, Anna wincing at the change of pace. Cathy had been so energetic just now during the entire show, yet now they looked.. empty.
"I'm really sorry, you know." Cathy spoke up, barely audible.
Anna frowned, moving closer. "Sorry about what, Schatze?" Cathy chuckled darkly, pointing to their neck.
"For lying about it. I couldn't tell you why i did it, nor how i managed it. But i am really sorry." They responded, looking down and grabbing at the pants of her costume.
Anna raised a brow, a small smile still remaining on her face. "You've said you're sorry a lot, we forgive you. You know that right?"
Cathy bit their lip, tugging a little harder at the fabric.
"I know. But i'm not blind and neither am i deaf. It's not hard to see that you guys don't take my word for things anymore."
Anna frowned, but before she could say anything Cathy continued.
"I heard Anne and Jane talking about me yesterday. They were talking about how hard they thought it was to trust me. I get where they're coming from but fuck that shit hurts." Tears stung at the corners of their eyes, which they quickly wiped away before Anna could see.
"You guys say i'm like an open book but i managed to hide the cause of my fucking death which is visible on my skin for two years and you guys couldn't manage to hide the fact you think i'm a lying bitch for longer then one week."
Anna winced, but that didn't stop her from attempting to reach for Cathy's hand.
"Fuck that was harsh i'm so sorry." Cathy blurted out, covering their mouth with the hand Anna was trying to grab.
"I totally get you. Like i said i straight up lied about my death why wouldn't i be a fucking liar? You guys have every right to be mad as shit, i don't know why you aren't."
"Cathy we could ne-"
Cathy's breathing started to pick up as they continued to ramble. "I fucked everything because i believed my death ruined my fucking dignity, like i had any to begin with. Of course you guys wouldn't trust me, i'm so sorry i said that."
"Cathy please, hold on a min-"
"I shouldn't have fucking lied to begin with, now i'm bitching about you guys doing something which is natural response to it like a fucking idiot. I'm so sorry."
"Catherine Parr."
Cathy shot up to meet Anna's gaze and in an instant they were sure they'd never felt more like a child to a disapproving mom then they did right at that moment.
Anna frowned when Cathy shied away from looking at her, their fingers tugging at their top.
"I'm really sorry i said that, that was wrong." Cathy said, their voice wavering in what was an obvious attempt to bite down tears.
"Thank you for acknowledging that, Cath. You being able to admit and apologize for that makes you ten times better then several people we know immediately. We all make mistakes." Anna assured, trying to coax Cathy to look at her to see her words were sincere.
"But, i must admit. While being distrustful of you for a while is a natural response, especially when you lie about.. that." Anna gestured towards the choker around Cathy's neck, to which the other smiled sheepishly.
"But you are still family, and we don't treat family like they're outsiders. And i'm sorry if you feel we've been treating you like you are."
Cathy stayed silent and frozen for a few more moments, before deflating and letting themself fall onto Anna's shoulder.
"Why are you so good at this shit." Cathy said, more a statement then it was a question. Anna laughed.
"Because you're important to me, you little shit." Anna teased, getting a small smile from the younger.
"I can say the stupidest shit around you, and you'll still be my friend. I like that." Cathy whispered, reaching to hold Anna's hand. Something which Anna accepted with an internal celebration of victory.
"Of course, i have been known to let people be stupid around me." Anna joked, getting a laugh from Cathy.
"But seriously, Catherine. You haven't fucked anything. Yeah shit happened, but we're a family. We've gone through stuff before and came out of it fine. If we give it some time. Everything will return back to normal soon."
Cathy nodded, finding themself getting too tired to argue.
"You're a really strong person Cath. We'll get through this."
It was half an hour later that the door to the dressing room was opened again, a concerned Catherine of Aragon standing in the doorway.
Her gaze softened and she breathed a sigh of relief when she saw her goddaughter and Anna on the couch.
Anna had gotten completely out of costume, Cathy still had the pants on but their top was replaced by a very oversized red t-shirt.
Anna looked up from her phone, giving a smile to Catalina. "They're asleep. Don't worry, i got them."
And if anyone had seen the way Cathy freaked out when they realized they'd not only fallen asleep on Anna but also woke up in her shirt, well they certainly didn't say a thing.
…
Catalina had talked to Anne about it, worrying for her goddaughter after what they'd said about their beheading. But it felt weird to confront them about it 3 days later.
But Anne had said it would be better to talk to them about it. So that's how Catalina found herself outside of Cathy's room figuring out if she should knock or not.
Before she could retreat however, the door slammed open. Catalina was lucky Cathy's door went inside, or she'd have been slammed on the face.
"Can i come in?" She asked to which Cathy immediately froze. Catalina's concern only grew at that.
"I kinda thought i escaped that talk." Cathy chuckled, stepping aside to allow the older into their room. Catalina smiled, going to sit on the edge of their bed.
Cathy sat beside her, quietly fidgeting with her fingers. "It's about what i said, right? About my beheading being a failure?" They asked, their voice quiet.
Catalina nodded. "I wanted to talk about it, but it felt weird to go to you 3 days after the fact. But Anne said it'd be better to talk about it."
Cathy chuckled. "Of course she did."
The two sat in silence for a moment as Catalina quietly considered her next actions.
"What did you mean by it?" Cathy looked up, searching their godmother's face for any judgement.
There wasn't any.
"I meant what i said. For the longest time i considered my beheading a failure, i still catch myself thinking it." Cathy explained, their eyes glued to the floor.
Catalina frowned. "Why did you think that?"
"I planned it all out. So carefully i made sure not to make a single mistake." Cathy mused. "And then i just had to say my opinion on something which didn't even matter." They spat out in frustration. “I know there was only a small chance i could have saved it, but jesus christ. I should have done something more instead of just accepting i’d be put on the scaffold.”
Catalina hummed as Cathy groaned. “That’s the reason i still ask for your guys’ opinion on things before voicing my own. Or even agree with you when i don’t. I know you guys won’t charge me for fucking treason-” Catalina chuckled. “But there’s this underlying trauma response that i just couldn’t get rid of.”
“Same reason that i didn’t tell you, i thought i would seem like a failure. Like i couldn’t even manage to survive even though he was so close to his death.” Cathy leaned back, a little too scared to lean on Catalina. “Now that i’m saying it out loud i sound fucking stupid.”
“No you don’t.”
Cathy perked up at that, looking at Catalina.
“What?”
“That doesn’t sound stupid. You were severely traumatized and have left over behaviors from it. That’s understandable, you realize that’s the same reason Anne put on the chaotic persona for the longest time? Her being so smart and clever was one of the reasons she got killed.”
Cathy thought for a moment. “I.. never thought about it like that.”
Catalina smiled, taking Cathy’s hand before taking them in a hug. “Maybe you should talk to Anne about this. It might ease your mind.”
“Yeah, i’ll do that.”
They stayed like that for a moment, enjoying each other's embrace. At least until Catalina decided she wanted to ease the somber mood in the room.
“Why were you so flustered when you gave Anna her shirt back this morning?”
“How about we stop talking for a while.”
….
Cathy seemed to have been getting a lot of visits that day, as an hour after Catalina had left Kate had entered.
Kate seemed nervous, which worried Cathy, who saved and shut their project off. “Hey Kat, What’s wrong?” They turned towards the younger with a raised brow.
“I wanted to talk.”
Cathy giggled, patting the bed. “That’s obvious. But what do you wanna talk about?” They asked. Kate sat where they pat the bed, completely tense.
“About our beheading’s.” She responded.
“Cathy do you.. think i’m at fault for your beheading?”
Cathy’s eyes grew wide, quickly grabbing both of Kate’s hands and kneeling in front of her. “No! Never! I could never! You did nothing, you had no control over either of our situations.” Kate nodded, tears already at her eyes. Cathy quickly cupped her face, smiling softly. “I mean it, there is not a single second in my life that i have blamed you for anything. Besides when you stole the snacks Jane made for me. I blamed you for that.”
Kate laughed, wiping her tears away.
“You had no control over your situation neither did you mine. You wonderful girl, i’m so sorry if i’ve made you feel like i do.”
Kate shook her head, a small smile on her own features. “You haven’t, it’s just trauma and shit.”
Cathy chuckled. “I get that.”
Kate hummed. “Why did you blame yourself for mine?”
Cathy froze before grinning. "You talked to Anna didn't you?" Kate grinned sheepishly and nodded.
"I did. And i still catch myself doing so." Cathy confessed, looking down.
"Sometimes i wonder if i hadn't gone to court so often, somehow it wouldn't have happened. But i know that's not how it works." They smiled up at Kate. "Which is why you shouldn't blame yourself for anything either, Fate has a funny way of working, if not you it's someone else."
Kate raised a brow. "Have you been talking to Anne? She says the exact same thing constantly."
"I gotta learn it somewhere." Cathy shrugged, giggling. "I overheard her say it recently, felt like it fit."
Kate smiled. "I suppose so."
"Say, how did you manage to get historians to say you survived."
Cathy gave a cheeky smile. "Well, you remember that time our savings suddenly got really low without explanation."
"...oh my god-"
….
It was the next day when Cathy decided to listen to Catalina's advice.
They'd asked Anne if they could talk after the first show, which Anne happily responded to with a 'yes!'
But to be honest as they walked off the stage, the dread pooling their stomach almost made them reconsider.
"I prepared some snacks for us." Anne said, walking over to the cabinet's while Cathy sat down.
Cathy fiddled with the peplum of the costume.
Anne raised a brow as she handed Cathy a few brownies. "So, Mon ange, what did you wanna talk about?" Anne smiled, sitting across from the last wife.
"You know… 'the one thing we have in common.' So to say."
"Our undying love for Catalina, though incredibly different."
Cathy gave her a death glare. "Stop talking to me about fucking my godmother." Anne laughed.
"I didn't say anything about fucking." She said, an amused smirk on her features. "But seriously, what did you wanna talk about?"
Cathy gulped. "Anne.. How did you deal with it." Anne gave them a confused look. "Like, how did you deal with.. being scared of like.. being the smartass you are now."
Anne hummed. "Okay, first of all. Cheeky comment there that i will ignore for now. second of all, before we get into anything, is it alright if i asked you why you wanted to talk about this?"
Cathy frowned. "I talked to Catalina-"
"I knew it."
"Shut the fuck up. I talked to Catalina about how my beheading affected how i share my opinions with you guys, and that you deal with something similar. I know Kate does too, but i don't wanna burden her with it."
Anne nodded, processing what was told to her. "Ah, The 'i'm totally not the smartest person in the house i'm such a gremlin please don't behead me for correcting you' dilemma"
Cathy giggled. "Yeah, that."
"Alright, hit me."
The last wife hesitated before sighing. "So.. you may know i got beheaded because i disagreed on exactly one topic with Henry."
"Motherfucker."
"Right. But because of that, i have a really hard time sharing my thoughts on things. I know you won't straight up charge me with treason but.."
Anne chuckled, giving Cathy a soft smile. "That's why you ask for our opinions first, right? Like when you were writing the show you needed to check with all of us what our opinion on every line was."
Cathy blushed, but nodded in response.
Anne laughed. "And when we're discussing anything you ask what we think and agree with us, sometimes through gritted teeth."
Cathy nodded again.
Anne's gaze softened, the humor in her tone disappearing in an instant. "Look, Ma belle. I know trauma is a hard thing to deal with, especially fucking death trauma. But i also promise you we would never judge you on any opinion you have, let alone outcast you. And surely we won't behead you."
Cathy sighed as Anne took their hand in both her own. "I know that's hard, and it's going to be a long process, i'm not even done. If it helps, you can just start out by voicing your opinion to me or Cat."
The last wife gave the second a grateful smile.
"I know it may turn out you need a different method of learning this then i did, but if that's so, we'll figure it out along the way."
Anne stood up to get a round the table and get a seat next to Cathy, before taking them in a gentle hug.
"Now was that all, or do you need more advice from the girlfriend of your godmother?"
Cathy barked out a laugh, covering their mouth with their hand.
"You're so cringe ew."
Anne raised a brow, a teasing grin on her face. "I deserve to be, i knew you when you were a child-"
"I was fifteen."
"And have every right to make you cringe because of it. And besides, i do remember this.. one time when you-"
"NOPE!" Cathy shot out from their seat, making a break for the door. "Don't wanna hear it, lalala!"
Anne laughed, chasing right after them. "Come back here! Let me cheer you up by making you cringe at your past actions!"
"SHUT UP!"
….
Catherine Parr woke up at 2 A.M.
They choked on a scream as they shot up, their chest heaving and their neck aching. Their hands shot to find their heartbeat as they coughed, which only made the pain at their neck grow.
They could see out of the corner of their eye a light turning on, they didn't care. They couldn't.
The ache at their neck felt like a beating heart, but this hurt, it hurt a lot. Shame burnt at the back of their mind as they subconsciously brought their hands up to scratch at it.
Except they couldn't.
The blurry mess that was their vision shifted, realizing their hands were being held out in front of them. And that the light had turned on. And that literally everyone was there.
Damn.
It was Catalina holding her hands, a soft smile on her face. "Hey mi cielito, you doing alright there?" Cathy couldn't manage for anything to come out of their mouth, so instead they just stared.
Cathy took the time to look around their room, the other queens scattered about. Anne sat at their desk and Jane had taken the bean bag and turned it around from the tv to face them. Kate had thrown a cushion on the floor to sit on top of, Anna having done the same.
Catalina was crouched in front of them, still with that smile, still holding their hands.
Their mouth felt dry.
"I'm.. sorry i woke you up." They muttered.
Catalina huffed in amusement, getting up sitting beside them. "Mija, do any of us look bothered?"
"Anne does."
Anne shot her gaze up giving a glare towards the last wife, who smiled slightly in return.
"It's my resting bitch face. I assure you, i'm not bothered." She smiled, rolling her eyes when Cathy giggled.
"But seriously, none of us are bothered. Like me and Jane said, you deserve your comfort." Catalina tapped Cathy's nose, to which the other physically cringed.
"Besides, it's nice not being the one who has their room filled with people to comfort them for a nightmare." Kate spoke up, a cheeky grin on her face. "Nice to switch roles every once in a while."
Anne laughed. "I hear you!"
Anna looked at the queens in the room before taking a breath. "You know, a lot has happened recently. And i think it's time we talk about it like, y'know, adults."
Immediately the atmosphere in the room changed, an uncomfortable tension hanging in the air. But the other queens nodded anyway.
"Well, alright. So we all have our own thoughts and have had our own conversations about what happened last week." Anna's gaze shifted to Cathy. "Some conversations more full of cursing." The last wife smiled sheepishly.
"But it's about time we brought those thoughts out in the open and talked about them."
After that the room stayed silent, everyone waiting for everyone to make the first move.
Cathy sighed, this wasn't going anywhere.
"I'm really sorry about lying. And sorry about going through such drastic measures to keep the lie going. That was horrible of me to do, especially about such a topic."
The last wife curled in on themself, biting on their nails. "I still carried a lot of trauma, i suppose. Most of my life had been planned for me and i always followed. Which is a miracle considering.. everything. So when Henry asked.. forced me to marry him, i made a plan so i could survive it. Except i didn't, and apparently everything being planned out for me and people getting mad at me when i messed up, fucked with me more then i'd realized."
Catalina placed a hand on Cathy's knee, giving them a soft smile.
"Trauma makes you do a lot of bad shit doesn't it?" Kate said, chuckling. "When i'd learned you were nearly beheaded i'd gotten really angry, not at you. Not that i knew who i was mad at. So when i learned you actually got beheaded…"
Cathy nodded along. "..You became extremely protective of me."
"Right, i think now that i've really thought about it, in some sense it was a trauma response. When all of history blames you for the abuse you went through, you start blaming yourself for things. Some part of me wanted to make it up to you, though deep down i knew i had no control over what happened to either of us."
"I swear, if i could go back in time and kill those men, i would." Anna said, making Kate giggle.
"Thanks, Anna."
"I think i went through something similar." Jane spoke up. "Not the whole beheading and blaming myself thing. But when we reincarnated i felt a lot of guilt for leaving behind Edward, even though i couldn't control it. So i became really protective and mother-like to all of you, even though i'm only older than Kate."
Catalina smiled. "Both Anne and me went through that too."
Anne nodded. "Yeah, being beheaded after having a daughter is a little traumatic. Also sorry about Mary, babes."
"You're forgiven hun."
"Gay."
"Shut up Anna."
Anne coughed, gesturing towards Cathy.
"Right, sorry." The first and fourth queen said in unison.
Anne laughed. "Okay look, Cathy, i'm gonna give it to you straight here. If i had been the one to figure it out, i would've slapped you upside the head and smacked the shit out of you." Cathy's eyes widened as they gave her a nervous grin.
"That being said, i understand what trauma can do to a person. So here on out officially, though already done unofficially before, i forgive you."
Catalina nodded. "Mi amor we all do, i'm sorry we haven't been clear enough with you on that."
"Thanks, but there's really no need to be sorry for anything, i'm the one that fu-"
Anna frowned, crossing her arms. "Let's cut it with that, okay? You lied about something horrible, and that was wrong. But you didn't fuck up anything. We're talking it out right now aren't we?"
Cathy hesitated before nodding slowly.
"We're a family and we don't let one mistake ruin that."
There were several noises of agreement around the room, and it only widened Cathy's smile.
Anna raised a brow. "On the topic, Cathy, do you wanna tell them what you told me a few days ago?"
Cathy froze, dread pooling in their stomach. "Not really, actually." They smiled nervously.
Anna smiled. "But it would be better to get it out in the open, wouldn't it?" Cathy whined, which only got a chuckle out of the fourth wife. "You're allowed to leave out all the cursing, by the way."
Cathy hesitated for a few more moments, before releasing tension with a sigh. "I overhear you guys talking about me a lot. How you think it's hard to believe me for a lot of stuff. Which i get, i lied about my death. But it'd be nice if you could make it less obvious."
They smiled a little, before returning to hiding their face in their knees.
Jane winced, immediately knowing they'd heard her and Anne talking. "I'm sorry, love-"
Cathy shook their head. "You don't have to be, lied about my death. Like, scarily well. It's a natural human response; it'll go away after a while. I'd just appreciate it being hidden a little better." They smiled sheepishly, shrugging.
"I, also, want to reiterate that we're all allowed our human responses to things but let's not overboard. Let's not make Cathy feel like they're being shoved away, yes?" Anna said, looking around the room for everyone's responses. The other queens, thankfully, nodded.
"Sorry if we've made you feel that way." Jane spoke up. Cathy gave her a comforting smile.
"You're good."
Anne clapped. "Does anyone have anything else they'd like to say about it now?" At the sincere no's and shaking of heads, Anne continued. "So we agree that what happened was weird and wrong, but we're all kinda over it now and going back to what we were before? With slight changes to accommodate the discovery, of course." There were more noises of agreement
She smiled. "Good."
It stayed silent for a few minutes, before Catalina sighed. "If no one says it, i will."
"What?" Cathy looked up in confusion. "What are you talking about?"
"Cathy.. we've all been talking and thinking about it for a bit now." The other women in the room nodded, though slightly hesitantly.
‘How upset would you be if I missed your birthday dinner?’ Anne asks Anna, grimacing. ‘Kat is coming over.’
She had forgotten about it. Or better. She hadn’t realised the two things would coincide.
'So what? Invite her! She can come too!’ Anna doesn’t see the problem at all.
‘Really?’
‘Sure! I like her.’
‘Good.’ Anne relaxes, relieved. ‘You can't be in my life if you don’t like her.’
.
‘This is for you.’ Kat hands Anna a gift bag.
‘You shouldn’t have but thank you.’
‘It’s nothing big, Anne didn’t give me much notice.’
‘This is amazing! Can’t imagine if you had more time!’ Anna reveals the framed cloth embroidered with her name and surrounded by a German flag, a dog, a hockey stick, and crossed fork, spoon, and knife. ‘How did you know?’
‘I listen to Anne.’ Because, boy, she talks about her. Kat never even had to ask because she had all the info already available.
‘This is so good,’ Cathy praises as she looks at it more closely. ‘How did you do it? How did you learn?’
‘Well, mamá Lina is great at drawing and she taught me a bit. And then I had to find something to do with mum too.’
Well, her mamá suggested it, saying that her mum would like to spend time with her doing something practical too, and Kat had only been happy to do so. And it made sense to her child’s mind, that her mum would be sad and feel left out if she spent all her time with her mamá. She didn’t like when Anne had to be at home with her siblings either.
‘Embroidery, cross-stitching, knitting, sewing...she knows it all.’
‘They are both great with their hands.’ Anne wiggles her eyebrows.
‘Eww!’ Kat slaps her arm. ‘Those are my mums!’ She shakes her head as if to remove the thought. ‘Anyway, it’s quite relaxing.’
Anne scoffs. ‘Not really. But she is a great teacher. And knitting is not that bad.’
‘We had epic needles fights,’ Kat recalls.
Anne nods with a fond smile. ‘Too bad they wouldn’t let us use them for scratching when we had our casts on.’
‘I bet you two were holy terrors,’ Anna comments as the girls beam at each other while reminiscing.
‘Were??’ they ask at the same time, acting affronted.
/
‘You excited?’
Cathy snorts at Anna’s question. Anne is one skip short of bouncing off the walls. She has been talking about the visit for days.
‘I know it has been just a couple of months, since they came to help Kat move in, but I missed them.’
‘I think that’s cute.’
‘Is your sister going to be here?’
Now it’s Anna’s turn to snicker at Cathy’s attempt to sound disinterested.
‘Uh?’
‘Is Kat coming too?’ Anna takes pity on her friend and repeats the question for her.
On The Ride starts playing.
‘Spoken it into existence!’ Anne winks at her, bringing her phone to her ear.
‘Hey. Okay.’ She immediately hangs up. ‘She is there.’ She points out.
‘Mamá! Mum!’ They can hear Kat’s voice as they walk towards her.
‘And there are the ‘rents.’
‘You’re acting as if you hadn’t seen them in ages,’ Anne comments once they are close.
Kat releases Jane. ‘I won’t hug you then, since I saw you two days ago.’
‘Shut up and hug me.’
Kat does so, picking her up and twirling her around for good measure.
‘So unfair you get to be taller,’ Anne grumbles, as usual, when she is put down.
‘I won the genetic lottery,’ Kat replies quite smugly – again, as usual.
‘Yes, you did,’ Cathy mutters under her breath, earning herself an elbow in the ribs courtesy of Anna. The yelp she lets out catches Anne’s attention.
‘Right!’ Anne turns to them. ‘This is mamá Lina–’
‘Catherine.’ Cathy holds out her hand. 'Cathy,’ she amends at the weird looks she is getting from her friends who had never once heard her referring to herself by her full name.
‘Anna.’ Once again she comes to her friend’s rescue, providing a distraction.
‘– and this is mum Jane.’
‘Anne told us a lot about you,’ both Jane and Anna say at the same time, prompting laughter.
Then Jane turns to Anne. ‘Well? No hugs for us?’
Anne bounces towards them and draws both women into a bear hug.
‘That’s better,’ Jane states, contented. She keeps an arm around Anne’s shoulders once they disentangle.
‘Do you have any plans?’ Catalina asks Anna and Cathy.
‘Going home?’ Anna looks over at her flatmate, who nods in confirmation.
‘Why don’t you join us for lunch?’
‘We don’t want to intrude.’
‘It would be our pleasure, really,’ Jane reassures them.
‘We’d like to know you better,’ Catalina adds, ‘and you can tell us what Anne has been up to.’
‘Why not Kat?’ Anne asks.
‘Because Kat call us every day. And they are your friends,’ Jane replies.
‘Or did you mean why not ask Kat?’ Catalina interjects, before giving Anne a look that says ‘are you really asking that?’
Anne beams proudly. ‘Kat would never tell on me.’
.
‘Please feel free to tell me if I’m being indiscreet,’ Jane addresses Anna and Cathy, but also sends a glance towards Anne, hoping she will intervene if her friends are too polite to say so, ‘but what are you plans for Christmas?’
‘We’re just going to stay here.’
Jane shares a look with Catalina, who gives a small nod. ‘We would like to extend an invitation then.’
‘Oh, no, no, we couldn’t.’
‘We’re serious. We would be happy to have you over.’
‘They are used to take in strays, if that’s what you’re worried about,’ Kat tells them, seeing the struggle on their faces, she imagines between wanting to accept and spend Christmas with friends and not wanting to intrude on family time.
‘Are you calling me a bitch?’
‘I did not. But you certainly could use a muzzle from time to time,’ Kat deadpans, looking at Anne.
‘Come on, I haven’t bitten you in ages!’
‘What??’
‘It’s a sign of affection!’ Anne defends herself.
‘I meant to keep your mouth shut. Which as you’re proving right now, you could really use.’
‘Is this what we were missing so much?’ Catalina asks her wife, before turning to the other two girls who are looking on amused. ‘Anyway, if you want to see more of these antics, you’re more than welcome to join us for Christmas. It’s quite lowkey, just us–’
‘Are–’ Anne starts, interrupting her.
‘Yes, they are coming.’
‘Oh joy,’ Anne mutters.
‘Must we do this every single year?’ Jane asks with a sigh.
‘One can only hope that one day the answer will be different.’
‘You love George,’ Catalina reminds her.
‘Yes, I love him,’ Anne stresses the pronoun. ‘What I don’t like is his...whatever.’
‘Wife,’ Jane says. ‘You know perfectly well that she is his wife.’
‘Unfortunately.’
‘God help the fool who falls in love with Kat,’ Catalina murmurs.
‘Or worse, the fool Kat falls in love with,’ Jane adds.
‘No, Anne, before you ask, there is nobody.’ Kat sends a glare towards her mothers for bringing up the topic. ‘Not after you scared away my last two girlfriends.’
‘Anyone who can be scared that easily into letting you go doesn’t deserve you in the first place.’
‘I agree with Anne.’
‘Of course, you do,’ Catalina whispers. Not to say that her wife fomented Anne’s protective streak...but her wife fomented Anne’s protective streak. And rewarded it.
‘Anyway, my non-existent romantic life aside,’ Kat tries to change the subject and get them back on track. ‘Lowkey Christmas. We just...eat a lot of food and play games.’ She stops to think about it. ‘That’s mostly it.’
‘You don’t have to decide now. Just think about it.’ Catalina smiles at them. ‘No obligations.’
.
‘Please tell me you’ll be coming!’ Anne pleads with her friends once the parents leave. ‘If only to give me a respite from Jane.’
‘Really nice Annie!’ Kat elbows her. ‘Jane is George’s wife,’ she adds seeing the confusion on their faces.
‘Even her name is troublesome,’ Anne complains. ‘Had to have the same name as mum.’
‘It’s not like she had a choice,’ Kat replies. It’s clearly a well-rehearsed argument between them. ‘And you could call her Rocky like I do.’ She then turns to Anna and Cathy. ‘She is nice, if you give her a chance,’ she tells them, not wanting them to have preconceived notions about the woman without ever having met her.
‘And you’re always defending her,’ Anne grumbles.
‘You know you’re my favourite.’ Kat kisses her cheek. ‘Always been, always will be.’
/
‘You know you don’t have to, right? Not only there is more than a month to go,’ Kat says as they walk around the shopping centre, Cathy having asked for her help with Christmas shopping, ‘but my mums don’t expect you to bring them gifts. You could show up with a bottle of wine for all they care. Even without that probably.’
Kat frowns, hearing Cathy muttering something about making a good impression.
‘Cathy…do you like Anne?’ She asks cautiously. ‘As in…do you have a crush on her?’ She clarifies. They are friends, so she obviously likes her.
‘What? No!’
Kat breathes a sigh of relief. Not just because she might like Cathy. Possibly more than just as friends. But also because she knows Anne likes Anna, and Anna likes Anne, not that they are any wiser….but when they do realise that…Cathy would just end up heartbroken. And their friendship potentially damaged.
‘Why would you think so?’ Cathy asks, looking genuinely puzzled by her assumption.
Kat shrugs. ‘You’re putting an awful lot of effort into finding perfect gifts for them....it made more sense if you wanted to impress them because they are important to Anne.’
‘Does it look like I’m trying too hard to win them over because I like their daughter?’
‘That’s what you’re doing?’
‘Hopefully.’
‘But you said–’
‘I did.’ Cathy looks at her, hopeful little smile on her lips, waiting for her to get it.
‘You like me?’ Kat breathes out when she finally does.
‘Very much.’
‘And you asked me to come today to buy gifts to impress my mums?’ she asks, almost to make sure that she is understanding the situation correctly.
‘Who knows them better than you?’ Kat nods. Cathy has a point there. ‘And I get to spend time with you.’
‘That’s nice.’
‘Yeah?’ For the first time Cathy seems insecure. ‘I mean, I know it’s not like I need their permission to date you, but–’
‘Whose permission do you need?’
‘Yours?’
‘Good answer.’
Cathy relaxes. Then she chuckles, ‘For a moment I thought whether I should say Anne.’
‘I bet she would love that.’ Kat shakes her head fondly. ‘I adore her, but no. But if you tell her that, you could win some points.’
‘She is not going to kill me, right?’ Cathy sounds worried for a moment. She knows how protective Anne is.
‘Perhaps we could wait a bit before telling her? See how it goes?’
She can see what Anne (and her mum) means when she says that anyone deciding she is ‘too much work’ just because she has a slightly overprotective best friend (and worst of all, anyone who doesn’t even tell her that is the reason, but makes it seems like it’s somehow her fault instead) does not deserve her and is not worth the tears. It doesn’t mean it didn’t hurt though.
‘I’d like to get to know you better, like, just the two of us, before having Anne insisting on chaperoning us everywhere.’
‘Just to be clear. Are you saying you would like to go on a date with me?’
‘Yes.’
‘Yes!’ Cathy exclaims, giving a little hop. ‘I mean,’ she tries to compose herself. ‘Yes. Thank you.’
Hearts Ache and Hearts Break But They’re Always Mended Back Together- pt 2
Takes place after ‘Dangerous Desires’. Katherine Howard has told her piece. Now it’s Jane Seymour’s turn.
1: I’m Unbreakable- Or At Least That’s What I Tell Myself
2: A Lot More Than What Most Would Do
A fourteen, nearly fifteen, year old Katherine Howard hadn’t settled quite like Jane Seymour was hoping. Not that she wasn’t a lovely girl- but she was rather nervous. Skittish. On guard at all times.
And if Jane was being honest, she wasn’t sure how to quite handle this girl. Most of the teens who had come into her home had been through the ringer, and they were hellbent on doing as they pleased no matter what the foster mother thought was right for them. At least at first- Jane Seymour had a way with people of all ages. Through their stays, even just for a night, she was able to work her magic touch and at least get through to them a bit- show them as much love and kindness as she could. No child would ever leave her house without a thank you, even if it was a short and hasty thank you.
But Katherine was different. She didn’t want to make Jane’s life a living hell by screaming at her angrily or stealing from her or leaving the house at any given time without so much as a warning. No, the lanky teen seemed absolutely terrified to be in the warm house but also terrified of leaving the house. She barely spoke above a whisper at first, and any sort of interaction with Jane left the girl practically gasping for breath in a panic. The blonde wasn’t sure which was worse.
“Please, make yourself at home,” Jane finally spoke to the girl after about a week of her living there. “Is there anything I can do to make you more comfortable while you’re here?”
The girl sitting on the couch shifted slightly before whispering, “N-no thank you. I’m okay, thank you.”
“Sweetheart, I’m so sorry the other homes you’ve been in have failed you, but- my home is not like that,” the blonde told her foster daughter softly. “I know it must be hard to believe, but I hope that I can prove that to you.” The teen only gave a shrug of the shoulders and a nod so little Jane almost missed it.
“I’ll... I’ll leave you be,” Jane said as softly as she could. Before she left the room, she threw one last glance at the girl. “If- if you need anything, or want anything, please just say the word. I won’t be upset. I promise you, I just want to help you Katherine.”
The foster mother wandered into her bedroom and closed the door as quietly as she could. Only then did she allow the hot tears of frustration rush down her face like a dam breaking. The sobs that wracked through her body like an earthquake were enough to shake her stomach and take her back in time to when she had just lost Edward, making her feel physically ill and nauseated.
Usually, this mothering thing came so easily to her, but the fragile and broken teen in the next room over was giving her a run for her money- she was different. She had no idea how to even approach the girl without sending her into a tizzy.
Desperate for some sort of grounding, she pulled her phone from her back pocket and called the one woman who was always there for her: Catherine Aragon.
“Hi Janey,” the blonde’s friend answered the phone.
“L-Lina,” she whimpered. “I-I don’t know if I can do this anymore. I’m so lost, and I just can’t seem to do anything right with this one, and I want nothing more than to-”
“Woah, woah, woah,” the other woman interrupted Jane. “Slow down Janey. What’s happening?”
The troubled woman explained everything to her dear friend, starting from the call that she received about the girl now in her care.
When she finished her tale, Catherine took a deep breath. “Jane, I think you just need to take a step back from it all and understand that she is different. You have her when she’s the most vulnerable, and she clearly hasn’t had a good background to begin with. Grant yourself some grace. You’re doing your best, and that’s a lot more than what most would do.”
Jane let the woman’s words sink in. She was trying her best. And her best was far more than what most foster parents would do. “I- I suppose you're right this time Lina. Thank you.”
“When are you going to just admit that I’m always right?” The hispanic on the phone chuckled. “But of course. You know I’m always here, and I can swing by with Mary and see if we can help bring the girl out of her shell a bit if you’d like.”
“Maybe in time,” Jane pondered aloud. “In due time, I think it might help, but right now I just need to focus on her getting comfortable around me.”
“That’s a good idea,” Catherine said softly. “But for what it’s worth, you’re doing just fine Jane. You really are, and it’s okay to have doubts and all of that, but don’t let it get you down.”
“Thank you for listening,” the blonde sighed into the phone. “This is just so much different from every other kid... in every single way.”
“I understand that. And Mary and I are here to support you every step of the way, don’t you forget that hun.”
“Lina and Mary have always been really nice,” Kat mused softly. “I like when they come around.”
“They really love having you around,” Jane told her. “They’re always asking about you.”
“It’s really nice... being wanted,” the teen smiles, cheeks red.
“It is, isn’t it?” the blonde grinned back. “But for a while, you had us all worried, and I never was quite sure if I was doing the right thing for you.” She admitted the last part with a heavy sign, a slight frown appearing.
“What do you mean?” Kat cocked her head to the side slightly. “You’ve always done the right thing for me, even if I didn’t know it at the time.”
NEW LEGEND OF THE SIX - CHAPTER 25 - SECRET OF THE FAE
AO3 Link
They had lost.
Catherine rose with the others - almost all the others, actually, as Katherine had not rose - as they calmly looked up at their master, their lord.
Anne disappeared in a cloud of shadow, Maggie and Elizabeth’s screams a distant echo.
Anna disappeared in a surge of fire, a dragon screech almost drowning out the screams of thousands.
Cathy disappears in a cloud of blue and pink, the maddened wails of soldiers in her wake.
But Catherine… Catherine remains. And kneels. And offers her sword.
The person in front of her takes it, and he smiles.
Henry smiles, and Catherine feels… foreign relief.
“You’ve finally seen the light of day, have you?” he asks. “Go on. Fulfill your duty to your king.”
She stands, turns from Henry and Jane, who was suddenly there, and looks down at Maria. Maria is being held down by golden chains.
“Please,” Maria sobs. “Don’t do this, Catherine. Please-!”
The sword’s Blessed energy glows, but it’s angry. Pleading, almost.
“PLEASE!” Maria yells, but the sword swings down-
The Blessed suddenly gasps awake, sweating slightly as she gasps for air. She looks around wildly, grabbing her sword next to her-
-only for a steady hand to shoot out to keep the blade on the ground.
Catherine immediately whips her head towards the source, ready to fire-
“Catherine.”
She blinks.
“Anne?”
Anne Boleyn keeps her hand on Catherine’s, holding the blade down. Her gaze isn’t judging at all, instead calmly assessing the started Blessed before her. She keeps Catherine’s gaze until she sees the panic settle for the normal type of calm - well, as normal as it could be given the circumstances.
“You’re not usually this jumpy,” Anne observes, slowly releasing Catherine’s hand.
She steps back as Catherine puts the hand that was on her blade onto her forehead. She shakes her head. “Just a nightmare. Nothing more.”
“What happened?” Anne asks, standing up.
Catherine shakes her head. “It’s… it’s nothing.”
Anne is silent for a moment before she nods.
“Well, it’d be a shame for you to suddenly break your Oath, Blessed, so do try to remember which of us is friend and foe next time you reach for that blade of yours, yeah?” Anne asks, stretching.
Catherine chuckles. “And here I thought we were being friendly.”
“Eh, we’ve been reunited for a day now,” Anne says with a smirk, looking over at the girl. “Let’s get out of here.”
They both step out of the tents they made for the night, stepping into the clearing that they had set up camp. The City of Everlasting Promise seemed nearby - infuriatingly so.
“Still stuck in this loop, eh?” Catherine asks with a sigh. “Even with how far we’ve gone…”
“Cathy has a plan,” Katherine says, but she’s not looking at the Blessed; instead, she’s looking forward, at Cathy.
The woman in question was with Anna, a few feet away. She was looking down at something in her hand, discussing it quietly with the Battlereeve.
“You’re probably right,” Cathy says. “I think that makes the most sense.”
Anna nods, somber. “It’s the only explanation I have as to why this area has grown so quickly in the time you suggested.” She shakes her head. “And with what you know about the Fae here… I think you might be on your own on this one.”
Cathy nods. “It makes the most sense, yes.”
Anne walks over. “Are we ready?”
Anna nods. “This is mostly Cathy’s show, but considering what I’ve been seeing, I think I can help towards the end.” She looks over at Cathy. “Whenever you’re ready.”
Cathy stands up, taking a deep breath… then starts to summon a portal. Multiple ones, actually. To so many places that there’s some even Catherine doesn’t recognize. Anna puts on a brave face, steeling herself, just before she moves to go into one of the portals-
“HEY! THAT’S CHEATING!”
-and suddenly, there’s Fae all around them. They’re a bit mad.
Cathy stops the summoning, a bit winded. “We were trying to get an audience with your leader-” Cathy starts, but a Fae steps forward and gets right into her face.
“NO, YOU PLAY WITH US FOREVER.” The Fae hollars.
Cathy shakes her head. “We can’t. You know we can’t.”
“Yes, you can!” The Fae is clearly distressed. “We can make it so.”
“But then,” Anna says, voice soft and kind. “We wouldn’t be able to help you.”
The Fae around them pause, chat amongst themselves for a moment.
“What do you mean?” The Fae ask.
There’s suddenly thousands of them around - so many voices and magicks that the group starts to feel whoozy. Katherine, in particular, leans a bit heavily into Anna’s side. Anna frowns, keeping the girl close, as she takes steady breaths in an attempt to steady herself. Even Catherine is affected, though far less than the rest of the group.
“What you’ve been showing us… these games… why did you make them?” Cathy asks.
The Fae narrows its eyes. “You dare ask a question of us?”
“To help,” Cathy tries. “To play-”
“This is NOT the game we wanted to play!” The Fae replies. A chorus of agreement is all around them. Maggie falls to the ground, holding her head, the world spinning. Anne tries to help her, but she’s struggling as well.
Cathy pushes forward; this had gone on far enough. “Alright!” she yells. “Alright. Let’s make a deal: we beat your next game, and we are free to go.”
The Fae chatter. Elizabeth looks pale.
The Fae smirk.
“That’s fine with me!”
All of the Fae’s eyes glow. All of them fade into nothing. All of them start to disappear into the mist that was now forming.
Cathy panics for a moment; before it gets too bad, Catherine rushes forward, grabbing her goddaughter just before they can no longer see anyone.
“This… isn’t good,” Catherine mumbles, looking around warily.
“No,” Cathy replies. “This is actually close to the plan.”
Cathy looks through the ring with a grin - through the ring, she can see as clear as day. She’s quick to bring them all together again. The mist fades.
The Fae are annoyed.
“How did you?” The Fae asks, but Cathy shrugs sheepishly.
“Through a ring can you see all things,” Cathy explains. “Especially one given to me by one of your own.”
They look over at the Fae in question and then back at Cathy. Cathy is smiling softly at the Fae in question. Then she looks up.
“I request an audience with your leader,” Cathy says again.
The Fae talk loudly around each other before, suddenly, they’re all transported again, this time back to the City of Everlasting Promise.
Catherine groans as she puts a hand to her head. She can’t seem to stop herself from grabbing her sword with her non-dominant hand. Elizabeth also seems to be unable to stop herself as she fights with her own off-hand, the two quickly pulled into a duel not of their own making.
Cathy is quick to stop this with some ice magicks. Anna takes the weapons before melting the ice. Katherine binds the two with vines instead.
“Is that what they made you do?” Cathy asks quietly, respectfully. “They made you fight each other?”
More angry voices. More swirling. This time, they’re back at the castle, and suddenly Katherine and Maggie are in some sort of path. They were stumbling through the path, and certainly would have fallen to their doom, had it not been Elizabeth and Anna using magicks and wings to guide them to safety.
“They tricked you, made you fear them?” Cathy asks, once again respectfully. The others haven’t said a word, refuse to at the moment. Anything they could say, after all, could damn them. “They used mind magicks?”
The Fae once again rise up in anger, and then, with a might shriek, they caused the group to fall to their knees in pain. When Cathy looked up, however, she’d find herself back in something of an ethereal Weston, with see through buildings and villagers.
She’d see through her husband as the execution went through.
She did not expect to feel it.
She screams in pain, body writhing around as it continues. She holds onto her neck for dear life, she squeezes her eyes shut to block out the pain-
-until she feels someone put a hand to her shoulder and tense. The pain is considerably less, but still agonizing. She knows the armored leg next to her belongs to Anna, who has seemingly grabbed onto her. Then a golden armor appears next to her, and the pain lessens, and they continue more and more, with the pain getting less and less the more it is shared. Cathy can look up now, to see the others taking the pain with her, all grimacing at the unpleasantness but remaining steady.
It gives Cathy the strength to continue.
She gets up, and then, with a deep breath, she yells:
“I call for John Parr!”
It all stops as suddenly as it began, and the Fae are quiet.
After a moment, someone steps forward.
“You know my name?”
Cathy’s smiling through tears.
“I would be a terrible wife if I didn’t.”
The area calms, and the thousands of Fae around them disappear.
John frowns, a hand to his head. “What’s happened?”
“You were executed,” Cathy explains quietly, getting up. She’s not alone - Catherine is right there with her. “You were executed, but you couldn’t move on.” She holds onto her wedding ring, the one that she used before to clear the mist. “You were stuck here. And you still are.”
John frowns. “Why do I only just remember this now?”
“Because of the trauma perhaps?” Anna asks. “Because of the magicks?”
“Magicks?” He asks, and he tenses as he remembers. “Oh, my god, the magicks-”
“Where?” Cathy asks quietly, and he’s clearly shaken, but he’ll answer.
“They… they’ve done some foul things, Cathy. They’ve hurt us all. They’ve trapped us here.”
“As prisoners?” Cathy asks.
“As energy sources.”
Cathy looks over to a Fae nearby, the Fae from the mirrors.
“I remember now, too,” they say. “Guess I just needed the reminder.”
“You’re all trapped here because of some magicks that are intended to keep you here for energy?” Catherine asks, and Maria tenses a bit because of the tone. Catherine’s furious.
“Yes,” John replies. “I… we’ve been turned into something we did not know was possible.”
“Anything like this is possible,” Anne replies gravely, “if you are a Keeper of Necromancy.”
Anna frowns. “You think Jane’s done it?”
“I think she’s part of it,” Anne says. She looks over at Catherine. “You can’t call me biased in this either, you know what they can do. The bad ones.”
Catherine sighs. “I don’t think I could argue with you on that,” Catherine relents, and she shakes her head. “This needs to be undone. We need to figure this out.”
“This was the biggest game of all,” Cathy says, moving closer to John. “Figuring you out. Figuring this area out.” She wants to hold his hand, to embrace him, but she knows she can’t; it’s too risky. Embracing a Fae - regardless of how they were made - rarely has good consequences. “We need to get out of here.”
“You can’t,” John replies. “Not without leaving something here. Not without a placeholder.”
Cathy frowns. “That shouldn’t be a problem.” She holds up her wedding ring, on its chain, and lets it go - it floats in the air. “My heart is clearly here. And here it will stay.”
John frowns. “I’m sorry, Cathy.”
Cathy smiles back. “So am I.”
He takes the offer begrudgingly, taking a deep breath before the ring disintegrates into nothing. Cathy forces herself to watch, even as it feels like her heart is being ripped from her chest all over again.
“I’ll strike a bargain, one that is for me and me alone, not my comrades,” she says quietly. “We help free you all, and I get my trinket back.”
The Fae discuss it with each other for moments before they all go silent at the same time.
John steps forward.
“You are a Friend of the Fae, Catherine Parr,” John says quietly. “And we will accept your terms.”
Cathy nods. “Let us leave, and I will fulfill my end of the bargain.”
Everything starts to fade - the City, the Fae, and John. Cathy can barely hold back tears as her husband fades away, barely holding back sobs. He smiles until he’s no longer visible.
“Are they gone?” Katherine asks, looking around warily.
“Not gone,” Anna says. “Just out of view.” She looks at the Catherine’s. “We need to get going. We’re not too far from Parlemont, which means we can grab the Seroserum and sprint to the Festival.”
Catherine agrees. “Even at our fastest, we’ll only have one shot at this.”
Cathy takes a deep breath before she uses her magick to summon spectral horses. Catherine raises her eyebrows at that, but Cathy doesn’t seem to care.
“Let’s do what we can, then,” Cathy says. “Push on.”
With a nod, they ride.
Elsewhere, far, far away, the Capitol’s festival preparations were in full swing.
The town was buzzing with anticipation of the upcoming festivities - servants and villagers alike ran in the halls, putting up decorations. The courtyard was converted to fairgrounds, with people setting up tents and mead halls and sparring pits. Already many had made their home there, and for the next few months they’d likely remain. The city was completely energized and excited.
It was a shame its queen couldn’t feel the same.
Jane watched from above it all, at the top of her tower, fairly passive. This, normally, would be one of the most exciting times of the year: the King would be in incredible spirits, as would the entire world around her, so Jane would have no choice but to be happy.
This year, however, was anything but a joyous occasion: her work was far from done, and would likely get more complicated and dangerous from here. The defenses - which she usually had no part in - were now her sole objective of the festival preparations thanks to her newly-minted Keeper status.
The people she worked with didn’t seem to question why the queen that once was in charge of the food and drink of the festival was now the head of security; they didn’t ask what had changed since her disappearance. Not that she’d be able to say why, after all; her being a Keeper was a closely guarded secret. Still, despite the secrecy and the like, people did start to look at her differently, even if they had no clue what was really going on.
Her dress, for example, was no longer what it was. Her signature black and white long sleeved dress with a cloak on the back was now replaced by a light coat and pants situation, with the seal of the Realm right over her heart. Her staff was no longer the long elegant one she was known for, but instead one of hard angles and a green crystal that seemed to faintly glow occasionally. It was a massive change, though that change was met with sympathy, with the people thinking it was through her trauma that she had changed.
Which, technically, they’d be right, but also so very wrong.
“Mum?”
She was brought out of her thoughts by a young man with a bright smile and something behind his back. Jane smiled back at him, brightening up at the sight of him.
“Hello, Edward,” Jane says fondly, softly. “How are you?”
“I’m well, but, uhm,” he says, bouncing up and down excitedly. “I’m… here!”
He whipped his hands around from behind his back and showed off what he made - a wooden star, painted black and white, with Jane’s name on it.
“Just like how we used to!” He says. “But this time, this star is for you!”
Jane swelled with pride as she took the star, smiling at him and hugging him tightly. “I love it, Eddie. Thank you.”
He nodded, his smile faltering after a moment, as he nuzzled into his mom’s shoulder as they continued the embrace. “I’m… not entirely sure what happened before.” Jane tenses as she remembers the situation. “But I think you saved me from something, didn’t you?” He releases and looks back at her. “I think something terrible’s happened, hasn’t it?”
Jane sighs. “You know it’s bad of you to say those things so loudly, don’t you?”
Edward shrugs. “Elizabeth said I shouldn’t worry that much. That he needs an heir.”
Jane chuckles. “She’s bright for her age, but that doesn’t mean he can’t hurt you.”
“I know,” he admits. “Because he can hurt you instead, and that’d hurt me.”
She pauses at that, looking down at her boy, before she nods.
He looks up at the stars then, and smiles.
“At least we’ve the stars to keep us company.”
Jane tilted her head curiously as she watched the stars move above them, a small smile slowly appearing on her face. Eddie’s laughter rang through her ears soothingly, like a song she never wanted to stop hearing.
“We should make a wish!” Eddie says with a small smile. “You always said a meteorshower like this means that the gods are listening closer than ever, so we should make a wish! One that we can think of so loudly, they’ll have to listen.” He closes his eyes, head still tilted towards the sky. “I know exactly what I’m going to wish for.”
Jane chuckles and nods, going to close her eyes before, suddenly, her gemstone on her staff starts to angrily pulse. She stiffens; it means she’s being called.
It stops as soon as Eddie opens his eyes, though, and he smiles.
“I hope it comes true. For both of us!” He nods, backing up. “I gotta go now, though; I promised Joan I’d help with the decorating.”
Jane nods, a bit relieved that Joan’s keeping Edward focused on other things while Jane continued with her grim task. She’s been a lifesaver, that Joan.
“Go on, and give her my best,” Jane says. Eddie nods, sprinting off with a final wave, down the tower and into the courtyard. Jane can see him as he meets up with Joan. He starts off and Joan looks up, directly at Jane. They share a moment before Joan nods courteously, then follows the boy.
Jane’s smile fades the farther her son gets from her.
She goes to the middle of the room, to a seal. It wasn’t there until recently. She presses down on it, and suddenly she’s transported to a room with no doors. It looks like a cellar of some sort, but Jane understands that this is no cellar; it might not even be in the world.
She takes a deep breath and moves towards the gentle pulsing orb that is in the center of the room. It’s actually quite soothing… or it would be, if it wasn’t the personification of the God of Death.
“Can… you hear me?” she asks.
The glowing orb pulses.
“I’ll, uh… I’ll take that as a yes,” Jane says quietly. She watches the orb for a moment - the movements are rhythmic. It’d be calming if it wasn’t a literal beacon of death.
“I’ve done some more research into you,” Jane says, head tilted down as she continues. Her tone is respectful. “And how you operate. And how… Keepers of Necromancy are.”
The pulsing continues, so she does as well.
“It’s a really interesting history, if I’m being honest. The ways that Keepers of Necromancy are rarely by choice, but by traditions or some sort of Pact.” She lowers her gaze. “Of Pacts that held treaties in some of the Forgotten Kingdoms.”
The orb glows brighter, pulsing suddenly before tendrils of green energy extend from it, dropping to the ground. The tendrils of light form into people. They’re completely green - still made of the energy of course - but their eyes are glowing.
Jane frowns. “Are these… other Keepers?”
She walks to each of them. One holds out their hand, still emotionless. Jane tilts her head curiously before taking it.
She gasps, head thrown back as her own eyes glow green. She’s pulled into a vision, looking through the eyes of the person whose hand she touched as if it was her own eyes:
“Callum,” the woman next to them, hand in theirs. “I know this isn’t what you had hoped. I understand that this wasn’t in the plan. But you must understand - this is for the good of us all.” She smiles, but it doesn’t quite reach her eye. “I know you will do this with grace. I know you won’t disrespect us. I just know it.” She starts to tear up. “As much as I did not want this for you.”
And with that, Jane is released.
She stumbles backwards, hand to her head as her eyes fade with the green energy. She gasps for air as she watches the person she had just moved to dissipate into nothing.
“That…” she takes a deep breath before composing herself. “That makes sense.” she looks back at the orb as the rest of the figures disappear from view. She steps forward. “I thank you for telling me more about my current… predicament.”
She’s being far more formal than usual because this was, after all, a god she was talking to. A god that now held her soul.
For now.
“I came to ask for a blessing, of sorts,” she continues. “Though I’m unsure if you grant them to your Keepers, I hope that you can honor your servant’s request.”
The orb does nothing.
Jane looks down at the ground, averting her gaze, taking a deep breath before she looks back up at the orb, intensely.
The stage manager’s eyes were wide and bulging in their sockets from her smoldering gaze. The queens couldn’t help but shy away slightly- all the crew members had an aura that nobody wanted to cross when worked up.
“She was sick,” Aragon explained.
“You couldn’t think to tell me this BEFORE the show was about to start?!” The stage manager snapped. She sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose. “Are any of the alts here? Tell them to throw on some makeup and do their hair, they’re going on.”
“Umm...no.”
“What?” The stage manager’s eyes snapped open to stare at Cathy.
“None of them are here.”
“WHAT?!”
The stage manager began to work herself up to a proper fit, barking and squawking at the queens and just about anyone who crossed her path like a jungle bird that just had its territory approached by a rivaling avian. She might have tore strips off the cast the entire time if it wasn’t for Anne suddenly piping up.
“Wait!! What about Joan?”
That made the stage manager shut up. She snapped her mouth shut and blinked before all eyes turned over to the nearby music director, who, up until that point, was peacefully eating a yogurt cup.
“What?” Joan said with the spoon still in her mouth.
“That’s perfect!” The stage manager exclaimed. “Joan! Go get your makeup and hair done!”
“My makeup and hair is already done?” Joan said. She was always ready an hour before the performance starts. “What’s going on?”
“You’re performing as Jane,” The stage manager said. “Aragon, Parr, go help her into costume!”
“Wait- What?!” Joan yelped, finally understanding. “I-I can’t- I-” But she was already being herded off into Jane’s dressing room.
The process of redoing her makeup and hair was hellish- there was a lot of tugging and pulling and painful brushing that scraped her scalp raw. She had to get an all new layer of makeup so she wouldn’t look washed out onstage and wouldn’t sweat it all off. Because she was sweating. A lot.
“God, you’re soaked,” Cathy laughed slightly, combing back Joan’s hair.
“Mm-hmm,” Joan merely replied. She was stiff in the chair, spine straightened in perfect posture for the first time in her life. Her hands clenched and unclenched anxiously in her lap. “G-guys, I--”
“I got the costume,” Aragon cut her off, taking Jane’s dress off the rack.
Joan actually gaped at it- were they really expecting her to wear that?!
“Guys--”
“Come on, stand up, Joan,” Aragon urged. “Let’s get this on you.”
“Guys!” Joan finally spoke up. Her voice had raised a few pitches. “I-I don’t think I can do this…”
“Of course you can!" Cathy said as she pulled her out of the chair. She and Aragon were being weirdly nice; usually they just ignored the music director unless they needed her for something. Joan guessed it was because they were in a rush and thought that being kind would get Joan to cooperate (which kinda worked).
“You know the show by heart. There's no way you can screw it all up." Aragon smiled gently as she set the costume on the back of the chair. "We'll be outside whilst you change, call us when you're ready.”
And with that, Joan was alone in the dressing room.
Standing in Jane's dressing room with the woman was one thing, but when she was alone everything felt wrong. Joan felt like she was invading Jane's personal space. She knew it was stupid, Jane wasn't here. Jane was at home, sick.
Deciding to not dwell on it any longer, Joan quickly changed into the costume. The first thing she noticed about the dress was that it was heavy, much heavier than she had imagined. The second thing she noticed was that it didn't fit her at all. Instead of looking like it was tailored to her body, it simply hung from her shoulders, and she didn’t even want to THINK about how saggy it was around her smaller chest. She was practically drowning in the fabric, and Joan wondered if she could just wear her band costume and claim it as an emergency alternate costume, but then the five minute call blasted through the speaker.
Cathy and Aragon burst through the door, stumbling over each other as they tumbled into the room.
“Come on Joan, the show is starting soon and we still need to have a mic check." Cathy said, giving Joan a quick glance. "You can't go on stage looking like that." Frantically, she and Aragon searched Jane's room for safety pins.
An announcement played over the speaker, saying the show was delayed for another ten minutes. Guilt started to consume Joan as she stood in the middle of Jane's dressing room. She must look rather pathetic, standing there in a dress too big and her face caked in makeup.
Suddenly, there’s hands cupping her cheeks and she flinches in surprise. Aragon is standing in front of her, holding her face while Cathy finished with the last of the pins. The golden queen tapped Joan’s cheek with a finger and Joan stopped trying to avoid her eyes like a dog that was caught drinking out of the toilet bowl, instead slowly meeting her patient gaze.
This was the first time Aragon had ever been affectionate or gentle with Joan. And Joan relished it.
“You’re going to be okay.” Aragon told her. Her voice was smooth and warm, coiling up Joan’s neck and slithering right into her ears. It numbs her anxiety.
“B-but what if I--”
“Shh...” Aragon stroked back a loose piece of hair that just didn’t want to stay down. She took a silver bobby-pin from her sleeve and pinned it back herself. “You’ll be just fine, darling. We know you can do this.”
“B-but I-- OW!!”
“Sorry!” Cathy called from behind Joan. “Yikes. That’s a lot of pins.” She laughed slightly. “But I’m sure it’s fine. The dress is silver, anyway! Matches the, uhh, color scheme!”
A chunk of ice drove itself into Joan’s stomach. She sets her trembling hands over her unsettled middle and Aragon quickly took them in her own. She squeezed them tightly. Oh how Joan wished she actually cared about her and wasn’t just doing this to get her to cooperate.
“I can’t,” Joan whispered.
Despite always dreaming of getting to perform and dance and sing, actually having to do it sounded horrible. Perhaps because it was forced onto her and she didn’t have a say at all. It would probably be easier if she had volunteered herself.
Maybe.
“You have to,” Aragon said. “I’m sorry. But I know you can do this.”
“Come on,” Cathy said.
The three of them walked down to the wings, where the other three queens and ladies in waiting were already in place onstage. Cathy and Aragon have to leave Joan, grabbing their mics and getting in their spots. Joan took Jane’s place a few moments after them. Right before the lights go out, she saw Maria, Bessie, Maggie, and even her dep giving her encouraging smiles and thumbs up. She shook her head nervously at them, pleading with her eyes for one of them to drop dead so she didn’t have to do this.
But alas.
Blackout.
A cacophony of anticipated murmurs swelled through the audience as the curtains part ever so slightly so the queens can walk out. They were just barely lit up by soft white lights bleeding dimly from backstage. Fog rolled out like great grey waves.
Then, pitch blackness once again.
She tripped. She knew she tripped or stumbled or something stupid while walking out of the curtains. She tripped or staggered or stepped wrong or something and now they all know she’s not Jane and they’re going to laugh at her and--
Joan couldn’t breathe. Her body was on autopilot as she followed along with the others, trying to walk the way Jane would normally walk (and yet she still messed that up with her slight stumble on her way out of the curtains). She hoped that she looked enough like the woman to fool the audience and keep them happy for at least half of the show before they got tired of seeing her as a fraud, but that was just wishful. They could take one look at her (or her chest) to know that she was not Jane Seymour.
And that scared her.
She was scared of them booing or leaving just because she wasn’t the queen. Which was entirely stupid of her to worry over because the alts and swings went on all the time and everyone loved them. But her anxiety just wouldn’t register that as true facts.
She was a fraud. And they were all going to laugh at her.
She really didn’t want to be laughed at...
A deep hum filled the auditorium- the beginning of Ex-Wives was starting. The sound seemed to rattle Joan to her very core as she listened to it. It honestly used to be serene and calming, but now it just filled her with icy cold dread. She wanted to throw up from the intense terror waving over her, but her stomach was in too tight of knots to eject anything at the moment.
“Divorced.”
A cone of purple light rained down on Aragon. There were the twin beats.
This whole part revolved a lot on timing, and Joan knew if she didn’t say her line at just the right moment, then she would throw Maria off. And she really didn’t want to embarrass her bandmates, too, so she gathered up as much confidence as she could and prepared herself.
“Beheaded.”
The purple light comes down on Anne. The twin beat resounds loudly.
This was her moment. One of her many moments, but a moment no less. She couldn’t fuck it up, not after the way she tripped.
The purple light spills its rays of amethyst over Joan and she takes a deep breath.
“D-ied.”
The twin drum beat thumps heavily. Joan swore the thunderous pulse was enough to shatter her rapidly beating heart, which just picked up even more speed.
Her voice cracked. Her fucking voice cracked.
She wondered if it was possible to swallow her microphone whole and choke on it so she wouldn’t have to do this...
“Divorced.”
A cone of light encased Anna. Joan exhaled deeply, no one seemed to notice. Maybe she could pretend to be sick, people have gone on sick before. Joan prayed that they had an alternate ready before Heart of Stone; she didn't know what she would do if she had to sing that song.
“Beheaded.”
Joan was ready to run, she didn't care about letting the audience down. But then the image of Jane popped into her head, she was frowning, like she was disappointed. Disappointed in Joan. That thought made her stay on stage, rooted in her spot.
“And tonight, London. We are…”
I can do this, She kept telling herself, hoping it would calm her down.
The pause seemed to last much longer than a few seconds. Her nerves mounted as she waiting. Joan raised the mic to her lips a bit early.
Then suddenly she saw Anne take a breath, meaning it was coming.
“Live!" Joan's voice was stronger than she thought, an excited grin adorned her face. I got it! She praised herself.
The show flew by in a whirl of flashing lights, humming harmonies, and barely-contained pride. The longer she performed, the more Joan got comfortable with the role of being the third queen. And the audience didn’t even seem to mind! They looked like they really liked her!
It was just amazing. Every inch of her body was tingling in joy, fueled by an adrenaline rush that seemed to be made of liquid gold. She hadn’t been this energetic about anything in a long time. Her limbs would ache the next day, but she didn’t care. She just continued to sing and dance and be genuinely happy.
The MegaSix soon rolled around, meaning the show would be over soon, and Joan found herself slightly sad while she danced along with the queens. She wished she could play this part forever, that she could always be in the spotlight like this. People would praise her name: Joan Meutas, the False Silver Queen. And they would love her, they would want her autograph and ask to take pictures with her and go to brag to their friends about meeting her.
It would be incredible.
Joan was so wrapped up in dancing and fantasizing her own popularity that she didn’t even realize something was wrong until a cold breeze hit her bare belly.
...Bare?
The audience gasped, yelped, shouted, laughed, whistled.
Cameras flashed.
The queens turned to her, frozen, eyes bulging out of their skull, mouths hanging open like their jaws had been unhinged.
Petrified, Joan slowly looked down at her naked body, shielded only by a bra and underwear, and the silver dress around her feet.
