#slightly personal

[boobstrider]

plurality's great

[evamasks]

My face is still not my own. . .

Even after all these years, he still sees a monster in the mirror. His eyes not his own, and he doesn't dare let anyone see. He should really get rid of that mirror.

I relate to Perpetua, at least the headcanons I made, heavily. Not being comfortable in one's skin, seeing someone else in the mirror, needing to hide behind something that is still not you, but a version you can be okay with.

Gender dysphoria sucks.

[bioluminosity]

I’m so sorry, I usually leave messages while anonymous, but I am just so overcome.

Your Planetary Voyager piece is the type of work that makes my heart weak and my dreams strong. I look at it and suddenly, it’s my first wide eyed day of art school again. I sit with the piece and I start thinking about how it’s not too late for me to go back and try being an artist again.

I just needed to let you know how wonderful it has been to come across your art. You should feel very proud of what you are capable of accomplishing.

Oh that's so nice of you to say <3 I feel similarly about some things (e.g. Other artists) as of late, I think due in part to being consistent with a new med and having art teaching experience instead of only private comms. I'm not where I want to be, but I am getting closer, and seeing art I want to do is more inspiring than defeating :) and at work, it's more my duty to help others feel their improvement and find their goals when they are in my art class, so I understand their frustrations and have to hear myself tell them "it always gets better" ^^

[wannabanauthor]

For those of us who started watching 9-1-1 again or for the first time because of the BuckTommy kiss, you are valid for wanting to watch the show only for that. It might help to look up summaries of what happened on the wiki to get a better feels for the characters to help in your shipping experience, but it’s also okay if you only watch BuckTommy scenes.

You’re allowed to enjoy fictional media in whatever way you want that’s not illegal. There are no gold medals given out for how you watch it. At all. You’re allowed to like what you like and discard the rest for whatever reason.

Me personally, I cannot emotionally handle all the drama in the show. I watched S1 and most of S2, and it was so heavy that I looked up to see if a pairing would happen and saw that it didn’t, so I quit the show because it was not worth emotional rollercoaster it put me on.

I work in mental health in my real life, and I have seen so many horrifying things in charts that I do not need to seek out emotionally traumatizing fiction outside my designated PMS days where I let my emotions run free.

Seriously though. I’ve been struggling with feeling like not a real fan of the show, but then I realized that it doesn’t matter. I’m not here to impress online strangers who definitely don’t sign my paychecks or pay my bills. I do that on my own, so I don’t give a fuck how people perceive me as a fan.

I’m 32 years old, and I have experienced a lot of loss in my life over the past 11 years. So many deaths of loved ones and funerals. Let’s not even discuss the performance punishment at my previous job that stressed me out so much that I was ready to leave this earth twice, and my parents had to intervene to talk me down. My mom, my former work mom, and stepmom all got cancer a few years ago, like one after the other, and survived. Do you really think that I need to watch the entire show and know all the details to be a proper fan? Especially with how heavy 9-1-1 can be?

So for my fellow fans and shippers of BuckTommy, enjoy the show however you want. There’s no right or wrong way to watch a show. Engaging in fandom however, is a different thing all together. But it’s perfectly fine to ship what you ship and ignore everything else. I’ve done it with several shows. Hell, some shows got my attention because of ships, and I stayed after the show went downhill because of the ships, but then eventually stopped watching. Or most of the time I quit when I see my ship sinking because I’ve been there when my ships had one character killed in a triggering way that relates to their marginalized status, and that has led me to have real life emotional breakdowns.

So take care of your mental health, and watch shows for whatever reason you want. People might judge you or look down on you, but that’s their fucking problem. Not yours. Why are they so obsessed with you anyway?

Have a wonderful weekend, folks, and remember the block button is there for a reason.

[stupidfuckingwindow]

I don't know if any fics will be posted any time soon considering the amount of dread I'm currently feeling as a person living in America right now, I deeply apologize for the delay, but part of it has also been a sudden loss in motivation to write, as well as the current news. Thank you to everyone for all your kind feedback and patience.

[number1spongebobfan]

BEST MUSIC <3

before i had to go no contact with my mom because of her delusions, she introduced me to this kind of music. so, despite me being “gen Z”, I am very familliar with it. i <3 dance music, it makes me high, happy, free, and it’s my escape.

[cathypostslol]

my favorite thing is getting hyperfixated on a game but I am terrible at playing it(/sarcasm). Anyways, my newest hyperfixation is Forsaken in Roblox! Love the game, but not a fan of some of the fandom lol

[queenmina37]

hey, um not to be one of "those" kind of people but it has been a few weeks after the one year anniversary of the last time you updated your "my ambition" au. just kinda wanted to see where you were with that.

Hey! No worries, you can always ask, as long as you're not being an asshole about it. I'm fine with being asked "How's life, how's this one fic, got any motivation and stuff" every now and then, just don't come begging for a new chapter you know.

But uhh, yeah, I didn't even notice! Honestly, I've just been having a shit year and haven't really been writing much for any fics. On top of that, for that particular fic, I got to a part where I'm not entirely sure how to write it so that it makes sense, you know. Because, well, I have an idea of what I want the next few chapters to look like but it's more of a general idea, and like, I know that certain characters need to hear certain things being said so that they will bring it up in the future and stuff, you know, but how I'm actually going to be able to do that so that it still makes sense is a little... difficult, I guess. Which is why I'm still stuck on that part. Sorry about that.

But I do intend to come back to it when I have a clearer image of how to do things and when life gets a bit better! Might be a while, though. So, uh, don't expect an update anytime soon, but I have every intention of getting back to it, since it is one of my own favorite fics that I've written, too!