Who is the possible survivor of the fire to which the Snicket File refers?
Short theory:
The sentence on page 13 states: "Because of the evidence discussed on page nine, experts now suspect that there may in fact be one survivor of the fire, but the survivor's whereabouts are unknown".
It can't be Quigley Quagmire, as the file explicitly states "one survivor," not "another survivor." Given that Isadora and Duncan Quagmire's survival is public knowledge, we're not discussing the Quagmire mansion fire. The clues point to the Baudelaire mansion fire and the alleged arsonist, Lemony Snicket, who has also been declared dead. This leads us to believe that Lemony, initially presumed dead and guilty, had his death status questioned by experts. Kit and Jacques Snicket, as shown in LSTUA and TCC, are on a mission to clear Lemony's name and confirm his survival, despite their grave doubts.
The Snicket File, aptly named "Snicket Fires" by Hall, underlines their fight against their brother's fiery accusations.
"And you're one of those twins!" Olaf said to Quigley. "You died a long time ago!"
- The Slippery Slope, p. 302
Olaf has the Snicket file. The Baudelaires and Quigley think that the one survivor of the fire the file mentions is Quigley. Olaf is surprised that Quigley is alive. This does not add up.
Violet hesitantly walked into the Library of Records glancing around at the wreckage that Esme Squalor had created. Her heart sank in her chest as she glanced over at the emergency exit door that she had tried to escape out of only to find herself in the arms of Count Olaf. She shuddered remembering how trapped she felt in the man’s arms.
“Ed? Is that really you!?” a friendly voice called out. Violet stiffened when she realized that a man was walking towards her hurriedly. She glanced back at her father who was slightly behind her. He was smiling towards the man and only shifted his gaze to Violet when he realized that she was looking at him. He gave his daughter a small smile and a quick nod to the head. The man walked over one of the fallen filing cabinets and smiled at Violet. “There you are, Ed! You’re so grown up!” the man said as he rushed to Violet and wrapped his arms tightly around her. Violet stiffened more at the feel of the embrace. The last time anyone had grabbed her in this particular room had been Olaf so she was feeling a bit uneasy as this stranger grabbed hold of her and held her. But unlike Olaf, the man’s embrace was warm and it made Violet feel safe. Like her father’s embrace had made her feel. Slowly, she eased into the hug and eventually even hugged the man back although she tried to turn towards her father to give him a look of confusion. “Ed...oh how I’ve missed you,”
Violet slowly released her grip from the man. “I’m sorry, but you must have me mistaken for...someone...else?” she said as she took a good look at the man before her. It was odd, he seemed familiar and recognizable but Violet could have sworn she had never met this man in her entire life. She had seen his face in pictures, though. Although, that wasn’t what had Violet confused as to why he was so familiar. When he glanced up at his face, she could see a weird mix of partial Sunny and partial Klaus. The man had the same eye and nose shape as her baby sister while the color of his hair, the way he wore his hair, and the glasses on his face had her thinking of Klaus.
The man smiled. “Oh no, you’re Ed.”
“Ed?” Violet repeated, confused as she glanced back at Lemony, who had the biggest smile on his face as he wiped a few happy tears from his eyes. “My name’s Violet,”
The man smiled again, he gave Violet a gentle pat on the back. “Well, L here tells me you’re an inventor,”
Violet smiled and nodded her head. Her father never wasted an opportunity to brag about her mechanical skills to anyone. They could be his closest friend or a complete stranger and Lemony Snicket would be yabbering on and on about his daughter’s inventive skills. “I am…” she said slowly.
“Well ‘Ed’ is short for Thomas Alva Edison...one of the greatest inventors...like you.” the man said smiling.
Violet nodded. “I’m sorry, you and I have never met...my name is…”
“Violet Malina Snicket,” the man replied, still smiling.
“How do you…”
“Well I chose your middle name,” the man explained. “And you and I have met before...you just wouldn’t remember it seeing as you were so little.”
“But...but...you’re dead…” Violet whimpered. “So...if I’m seeing you...I...I have to be…”
“Sweetheart, we’ve discussed this.” Lemony said from behind her. “You’re not dead...we are. Your subconscious is trying to help you cope with what’s happening on the outside world.”
“What is happening in the…”
“Nothing we need to worry about,” Bertrand explained. “You’ll be safe soon,”
“But how do you…” Violet asked, confused. “How am I…”
Bertrand and Lemony looked at one another and smiled. Bertrand pulled Violet into a tight embrace when he had seen that she was crying. “Shhhh,” he said holding his eldest daughter close. “No need for tears. Everything is going to get better eventually,”
“No, it won’t,” Violet replied. “Olaf won’t stop until…”
“I knew the only downside of Lemony raising you would be you inheriting his pessimistic views on life,” a female voice said. Violet stiffened once more as she heard the click and clank of the woman’s heels. Even if these heels were normal and produced a different sound than Esme’s stiletto knife heels, Violet couldn’t help but cringe each time she heard the sound of the woman approaching. The woman carefully walked around a few of the fallen cabinets, glancing from left to right studying the damage that Esme had created. Violet tried her best to get a glimpse of the woman’s face but she was unable to. “You know...all of this for some drugs…” the woman muttered pointing to the damage. Violet cocked her head confused as the woman tried to step over one of the cabinets as Bertrand had a few minutes prior. Something in Violet made her retreat behind Bertrand as Lemony quickly walked up towards the woman and helped her step over the cabinet. Violet didn’t know why but the voice seemed vaguely familiar. A familiarity that Violet was unsure of until she got a glimpse of the woman.
The woman looked up at her with tears in her eyes. “My...my Violet Malina,” the woman said before rushing towards Violet and hugging her. The woman hugged Violet tighter than Lemony or Bertrand had which surprised Violet she didn’t believe that was possible. Violet recognized the woman’s face from every time she glanced either at her locket or in the mirror. The woman’s face was a near carbon copy of Violet’s own face except for the eyes and when she glanced towards the woman’s eyes she could instantly see that her brother possessed her eyes. The woman cried as she held onto Violet. “My baby girl…I’m so sorry,” she cried as her grip on Violet strengthened. Violet felt as though she couldn’t breathe, but she didn’t find it a problem because she was one hundred percent convinced that she was dead.
“Bea…” Violet began but stopped. It didn’t feel right to call this woman by her first name when there was a more appropriate name for Violet to call her. It was a title that Beatrice first obtained when Violet was born and Violet didn’t see an issue with her using it even if this was a dream and she had never met this woman before. “Mom?”
Beatrice released some of her grip from Violet to look at her daughter. Beatrice was rendered speechless but slowly nodded her head as she wiped her eyes once more. “Yeah...I’m...I’m your mother,” she said as she put her hand on one of Violet’s bruised cheeks.
Violet tried to keep a smile on her face as she wrapped her arms around Beatrice tightly and began to sob into the woman’s shoulder. Beatrice ran her fingers through Violet’s tangled hair, doing her best to gently untangle it in the process. “Shhh,” Beatrice cooed. “Mother’s here now,”
“You...I...I…” Violet cried.
“Violet...I’m so proud of you,” Beatrice cried, she glanced up at Bertrand when he cleared his throat. “Sorry,” she called out to Bertrand as she looked back down at Violet. “ We are so proud of you, sweetheart.”
“Proud of me?” Violet repeated. “For what?”
“For what?” Bertrand repeated incredulously. “For protecting your siblings, of course.” Bertrand stepped closer to Beatrice and Violet, pulling them into a huge embrace. He then glanced over at Lemony, gesturing for the awkward bibliophile to join the embrace. Violet felt a sense of belonging and safety as she felt the strong embrace of all three of her parents. But even though she felt safe in their arms, she began to cry, all of her emotions hitting her at once.
She glanced up at them, looking more so towards Bertrand and Beatrice as she slowly shook her head. “But...I haven’t...Sunny was still…Olaf kidnapped her... and...and Klaus is…he’s severely...traumatized...and...” she cried through her tears.
“None of that is your fault, Ed,” Bertrand explained.
Beatrice gently broke the embrace and knelt down in front of Violet. She placed her hand once more on Violet’s bruised cheek. “Vi...sweetie...your father is right,” Beatrice said. “ None of that is your fault. You selflessly took them under your wing the moment you realized who they were.”
“Well...I had to…” Violet explained, shrugging her shoulders. “Snickets take care of their own...and they’re my siblings,”
Her three parents smiled. “You selflessly took them in,” Lemony said.
“You sacrificed yourself for their safety,” Bertrand added.
“And...when you had the chance to escape...you got recaptured because you thought your brother was in danger,” Beatrice added smiling. “ That shows how big your heart is, Violet. It shows how much you love your younger siblings and how much you truly belong with them,”
Violet shook her head when Beatrice mentioned her belonging with her siblings. “I don’t belong with them…” she admitted meekly. “They…”
“Now, Violet, why wouldn’t you belong with your siblings?” Bertrand asked.
“You’re just as much of a Baudelaire as they are,” Beatrice explained. “You are my first born. You are my eldest, not Klaus. Klaus is our middle child, Violet.”
Violet nodded her head but continued to cry. “But...there’s...there’s this...invisible wall…”
Beatrice shook her head as she wiped Violet’s tears away. “There is no wall. There is no barrier. Klaus and Sunny are your siblings. If…if life hadn’t turned out the way it had...all three of you would’ve been Snickets and Baudelaires.”
“But...Olaf and Esme…and Mr. Poe…” Violet cried out.
Lemony gave a low growl as Bertrand’s facial expression turned sour. “Mr. Poe is...an incompetent buffoon,” Beatrice explained.
“But he’s in charge of Klaus and Sunny’s affairs…”
“He was the lesser evil of our two options,” Bertrand explained.
“Who was the second option?” Violet asked curiously.
Beatrice gestured to the destroyed library. “The bitch who did all this,” Beatrice explained. Violet gasped.
“And speaking of her,” Bertrand began as he, too, knelt down to Violet’s level. “Her and Olaf don’t understand how the basics of family work. You are our daughter as much as Sunny is,”
Violet nodded her head as she glanced up towards her father. “Are you sure this is a dream?” she asked in a low voice as he nodded his head. “Cause if it isn’t...and...I’m...down for the count...I wouldn’t mind staying here with you.” she admitted.
Beatrice and Bertrand frowned as Lemony sighed. “Sweetie, this is a dream and...eventually you’ll wake up and have to deal with whatever is happening in the outside world.”
Violet nodded as she looked back towards Beatrice and Bertrand. “You are everything I hoped you’d grow up to be,” Beatrice told Violet.
“L didn’t do a bad job at all,” Bertrand agreed.
Lemony groaned. “I wish you’d stop calling me ‘L’,”
“Well, I know how much you hate your name,” Bertrand explained with a smirk.
“I hate ‘L’ more than I hate my name,” Lemony informed. “And you know this,”
Beatrice rolled her eyes at the two men as they bickered but she focused her attention solely on her daughter. “I wish I could’ve seen you grow up…” Beatrice cried, her eyes filling with tears once more. “God, you would’ve made us so proud every day.”
Bertrand nodded as Violet jolted violently. “What’s happening?” she asked worriedly.
“You might be waking up,” Lemony explained.
“But...I don’t wanna leave you guys just yet,” Violet pleaded.
Beatrice sighed. “We would love to stay with you, too. But you’re needed, Violet. The three of you need each other to survive Olaf,”
“But…”
Bertrand hugged Violet once more quickly. “Can you do us a favor sweetie, can you tell Klaus and Sunny that we love and miss them,” he said. “Can you also tell your brother that we don’t blame him for anything bad that has happened to Sunny. We should have never asked him to make that promise,”
“If everything went the way you had planned...I would’ve been asked to keep that promise...right?” Violet asked.
Bertrand sighed and nodded slowly. “You don’t have to keep that promise either, Ed. It’s a truly unfair and impossible promise.”
“I wouldn’t call it impossible,” Violet said, shrugging her shoulders.
Bertrand released Violet from the embrace but gently put his hands on her shoulders. “I don’t want you thinking you have to take on that promise for your brother. We should have never made him promise that. I would prefer that the three of you promise to take care of one another...as a team.” he explained sternly but kindly.
Violet nodded slowly, her eyes filling to the brim with tears. Bertrand released Violet’s shoulders as Lemony hugged her. “You are stronger than he is, Violet. You’re fighting isn’t for nothing,” he explained. “He may have tiny victories...but you will prevail overall.”
“But...if…” Violet cried.
Lemony released Violet from the embrace and Beatrice grabbed onto Violet and hugged her tightly. “The three of you will take care of each other. I know it. I have no doubt about it. You have grown into an amazing young woman. You couldn’t make me prouder even if you tried.” Beatrice explained. Violet jolted once more in her mother’s arms.
Violet nodded. “Please don’t leave me,” she cried. “I can’t do this alone.”
“You’re not alone,” Beatrice explained, her voice shifting slightly. “You have your siblings.”
“But they left…” Violet cried. “Olaf said…”
“Olaf is a lying piece of shit,” Bertrand explained, although his voice shifted like Beatrice’s. It was as if Bertrand sounded younger...prepubescent, even.
She moved her head slightly to look towards Bertrand, who was becoming blurry. “ No!” Violet cried as she reached out for Bertrand as she continued to hug Beatrice. “ Dad...don’t go!” she called out. Her heart fluttered in confusion as Bertrand slowly shrunk down a bit, his face shifted a bit, becoming rounder. Violet had to blink a couple of times as she watched Bertrand slowly form into her brother. “ Klaus…?” she cried out, wrapping her arms around her mother tighter than before. “ No...no...you can’t be here. You can’t be dead, too.”
But the Klaus in front of her didn’t say anything as if he couldn’t see who was holding her in a tight embrace. Lemony sighed. “Sweetie, we’ve been through this…” he began. Violet turned towards him and watched as he was becoming more and more blurry. “...you’re...not dead…”
Violet reached out for Lemony, but Lemony didn’t reach out for her. “ Mr. Lemons! Please don’t go!”
Violet’s eyes filled with tears as her father was going in and out of blurriness. As if he was only half disappearing. Was she waking up? What was happening? All of Violet’s questions were hushed when she felt the woman holding her in the embrace begin to laugh. It was an unsettling laugh. “ Now...I wouldn’t say that…” her mother said, although at this point, the voice that came out of her mother’s mouth was not how she imaged her mother’s voice just moments ago. It was a snarling voice, a recognizable voice. “ It’s time to lose our first patient,” the feminine voice snarled before laughing again.
Violet released her grip from around her mother and watched in horror as her mother’s hair bleached down to blonde before her eyes. Her mother’s shoes turned into stiletto knives and her mother’s face turned from the one that smiled back at her every time she glanced down at her locket to the face of a woman who will probably haunt plenty of violet’s nightmares.
“ Mom! No...please come back!” she shrieked as she pushed herself away from the vision of Esme Squalor that was once her mother. “ No...no...no…” she panicked. She looked back at where her brother stood. He seemed angry, but he was silent. “ Klaus! What are you doing, get out of here, run!” she turned back towards where she had last scene her father. “Mr. Lemons...thank God you’re still here…” she started to say as Lemony once again began to slowly disappear and reappear but always staying blurry. “ No…no...you...not you, too!” she pleaded as her father merely cocked his head to the side and began to bellow out a cruel laugh. A laugh that Violet and her siblings knew all too well. It was a wheezy laugh. She fell to her knees crying. “ No...no...no…” From where she sat, she watched in absolute horror as her father’s pant leg shrank, becoming unable to hide his tattooed ankle. She glanced up towards his face. “ Mr. lemons come back!” she pleaded, reaching a hand out for her father as he closed his eyes and jolted back a bit. When he opened his eyes though, they were no longer dull and blue. They were green and shiny. The same degree of shiny that had been plaguing Violet’s life since the tragic death of her father and the same shiny eyes that had been plaguing her siblings’ lives since even before then. She watched in horror as her father’s silhouette turned into the silhouette of the man who would surely haunt her every nightmare. “ No!” she screamed at the top of her lungs. “ No...no...no…” she glared towards Olaf. “ Bring him back!” she turned towards Esme who was still cackling. “ Bring her back! Bring them all back!”
“ Do it!” Esme screeched towards Klaus, who stood there confused.. “ Do it!”
Violet looked confused towards Klaus. “Do what?” she pondered.
“The best thing...for you to do...for our patient,” Olaf began as he, too, turned towards Klaus.
“Patient?” Violet asked worriedly. She looked from the two villains to her brother. “Where’s Sunny? Klaus...what’s happening?” she asked, her heart pounding. She glanced around and only now began to notice that the Library of Records looked vastly different. It was far too bright, every way she looked she couldn’t see anything but a very bright light. She watched as Esme took a step closer towards Klaus, she could hear the vicious sound of Esme’s knife heel stabbing the floor. Violet quickly stood. “ No! Stay away from him!” she pleaded.
“Is to remove her head altogether,” Olaf hissed.
Violet looked towards him with utter confusion. “Remove whose head?” she asked incredulously.
She looked towards Klaus, who looked up at Olaf and Esme, he seemed to be nodding. “ Klaus…” she called out, but he didn’t say anything. She glanced down at his hands and noticed that her brother was holding a long, rusty knife.
“There’s a chance…” Klaus began. Although Violet was confused. The voice that was coming out of Klaus’ mouth didn’t entirely sound like his. But his lips were moving perfectly to dictate what was being said. “...that the patient could die. ”
Olaf nodded his head. “Sometimes we make sacrifices for the sake of…protection...”
Violet shook her head slowly, none of this felt right. She was crying hard and trying her best to walk away from the scene that was unfolding before her. But it was like she was restrained. She might have been standing, but every time she moved her hands or legs, no movement followed. “ No...no…they said I wasn’t dead.”
Olaf turned towards Klaus. “Isn’t that so?”
“What do we do?” Klaus asked, his voice sounding more like himself. Violet’s head was spinning. Was she still dreaming? Was she finally dead? If that was the case why did her parents disappear?
“Before I make the first incision…” Klaus began. “This is a knife,”
“Well, let’s see you use it!” Esme screeched, although her voice was rough and wheezy like Olaf. “ do it! Do it!”
“ Do it!” Olaf barked. Klaus looked down towards the knife in his hand and then he looked at Violet for the first time since he had appeared in place of his father. He stood there, unmoving, just continuing to stare towards Violet. Olaf and Esme seemed to become impatient because they rushed over towards Klaus and began whispering to him. To violet’s horror and confusion, Klaus whispered back to them but as Violet watched on it didn’t seem as though Klaus was arguing with the two villains, but it seemed like he was agreeing with them.
“If...it means...leaving... Violet,” Klaus explained as Violet’s eyes widened.
“ No...no...no...no...you can’t leave me… ” Violet pleaded as the blinding light was beginning to consume the room around her. “ You son of a...you can’t leave me! Mom! Dad! Mr. Lemons! Come back! I can’t…” she whimpered as she felt herself slowly opening her eyes, feeling as if she had been consumed by the bright light that had once surrounded her in her dreams.
Esme smirked as she held Klaus back every time that he tried to move closer to his older sister. Both Klaus and Esme watch as Olaf looked directly at Esme slowly nodding his head. Klaus looked from Olaf to Esme angrily as Esme smirked once more as she released her grip on Klaus’ shoulder with a slight push to get him to walk closer to his unconscious sister who lay on the gurney. He shuddered and felt his blood run cold as he glanced around slowly at the surprisingly packed operating theater. Klaus Baudelaire was well aware that operating theaters are not nearly as popular as dramatic theaters, musical theaters, and movie theaters, and it is easy to know why. A dramatic theater is a large, dark room in which actors perform a play, and if you are in the audience, you can enjoy yourself by listening to the dialog and looking at the costumes. A musical theater is a large, dark room in which musicians perform a symphony, and if you are in the audience, you can enjoy yourself by listening to the melodies and watching the conductor wave his little stick around. And a movie theater is a large, dark room in which a projectionist shows a film, and if you are in the audience, you can enjoy yourself by eating popcorn and gossiping about movie stars. But an operating theater is a large, oddly lit room in which doctors perform medical procedures, and if you are in the audience, the best thing to do is to leave at once because there is never anything on display in an operating theater but pain, suffering and discomfort, and it was for this reason that Klaus was surprised to see how many people filled the theater. There were rows of doctors in white coats who were clearly eager to see a new operation being performed. There were clusters of nurses sitting together and whispering with excitement about the world’s first cranioectomy. There was a large group of the Volunteers Fighting Disease who seemed ready to burst into song if needed. And there were a great many people who looked like they had simply walked over to the operating theater to see what was playing. He also noticed in the front row was the rest of Olaf’s vicious troupe. All of them glaring and smirking at him.
As he stepped closer and closer to his sister, he kept his glare on Count Olaf. Klaus gasped at how dreadful his older sister looked. When Olaf had mentioned ‘Sleeping Beauty’, he was referring to a fairy tale that you have probably heard one thousand times. But when Klaus finally got a good look at Violet, it looked nothing like a fairy tale. He shuddered when he saw his elder sister laying on the gurney, he noticed that this particular gurney was as rusty as the knife that Esme held, and its sheets were ripped and soiled. The middle orphan felt his blood slowly begin to boil when he noticed that she was no longer wearing her overalls but had on just a hospital gown, a hospital gown that was as filthy as the sheets. He looked from her, his full face of guilt and remorse.
Why didn’t he protect her? He knew the kind of danger she was in. Olaf had made his intentions with Violet very clear. He thought. He slowly walked over closer to Violet’s numb body noticing Violet’s two bruised cheeks even under all of her hair that had been messily thrown over her eyes so that no one would recognize her face from The Daily Punctilio. Except for her cheeks, Klaus noticed that the rest of Violet’s face was pale, as pale and empty as the surface of the moon, and her mouth was open slightly in a vacant frown underneath the anesthesia mask. He shook his head, holding back tears as he noticed that his sister’s wrists and ankles were tied to the corners of the gurney. Her fingers hung loosely over the edge of the gurney, her fingertips all pointing down towards the floor. Even her bare feet slumped over the edge of gurney, completely limp and lifeless. She was entirely helpless. He had never seen anyone so helpless before. He glanced up at the man who stood before him, who wore the biggest chilling grin. Sunny could feel Klaus’ chest rise and fall as he took a deep angry breath, but still somehow casually walked up to the man. Klaus looked from the sinister man to his older sister, who looked as though she had been dropped onto the gurney from a great height. Honestly, if it weren’t for the slow and steady rise of her chest as she breathed, it would have looked like she had not survived the fall. Klaus looked at her in horrified silence, Sunny pushing Klaus’ medical coat apart just slightly between two buttons so she, too, can get a peak at her sister and when she had, she gasped loudly, moving her fingers so that the jacket would obstruct her view from her sister once more. Klaus could feel Sunny shudder in response to the horrifying view. Klaus put a hand over where Sunny was, in an effort to comfort her.
Klaus glared towards Olaf and slowly turned to the audience. “Excuse me, ladies and gentleman.” he called out to the audience. “I must have a quick word with Dr. Medical-School, here,” Klaus hissed in his disguised deep British accent. Olaf looked at him confused and even Sunny gave a look of confusion from under Klaus’ medical coat. Klaus grabbed Olaf’s arm, pulling him close to the young boy’s face. “ Listen to me very carefully,” Klaus hissed in a tone that sent chills down his younger sister’s back even causing her to shudder. “ If you touched Violet in any way…” Klaus stopped speaking when Olaf merely smirked at the boy, Klaus watched the sinister bastard shrug his shoulders as if he had no idea as to what Klaus was indicating.
He pulled Olaf close to him once more, harsher this time, causing Olaf to bump into Sunny directly, forgetting for a brief moment that his sister resided in the front of his disguise. To focused on protecting his older sister at the moment. “ If you touched Violet...I promise you, you will have Hell to pay!” He hissed. “ No one touches my sisters.”
Olaf smirked at the boy, a sinister smirk, laced with cruelty. Klaus didn’t know what the smirk meant. Olaf gripped his arm and leaned in real close to whisper a cruel response to the thirteen year old boy. “ Maybe I did...and maybe I didn’t. Wouldn’t you like to know?”
Esme’s face lit up with an idea as she quickly walked towards Klaus roughly handing him the sharp, rusty knife. “Don’t forget this,” she hissed, smiling towards the crowd. She glanced back towards Klaus. “ You’ll need it.” As she began to remove herself from center stage, she glanced at a confused Olaf whose face was a mix of pure confusion and utter annoyance. He looked from the knife, that was now being held by Klaus. Then at Esme, who merely shrugged her shoulders at him. Olaf gave a low growl as he glanced around at the crowd trying to rewire his plan seeing that Esme had handed Klaus a weapon. A devious smirk was planted on his face.
He gestured towards Violet. “Well, hurry along, Doctor Faustus. The anesthesia won’t last forever.”
Klaus looked from the rusty knife in his hands towards his older sister and then to Olaf, who merely turned his attention to the crowd.
“I do hope she doesn’t wake up in the middle of the operation,” Esme called out to Klaus, as she grinned happily at the prospect of what she had just said happening. Klaus turned to her in utter disbelief as she glared at him. He looked down nervously at his unconscious sister completely unsure of what to do.
“Doctors, nurses, Volunteers Fighting Disease, gore fans, regular people, welcome to the operating theater of Heimlich Hospital! I am Dr. Mattathias Medical School and these are my associates,” he said gesturing towards an angry and confused Klaus and a bloodthirsty Esme.
“And I am Nurse Cassandra Ursula Terrific Elliandra…” Esme said loudly.
“And of course, the man who will be performing the operation,” Olaf interrupted rolling his eyes at Esme. “the marvelous Doctor Faustus.” He gestured towards Klaus. Klaus responded by giving Olaf a pleading look. His way of begging Olaf to stop this insane plot. He knew it was effortless but he couldn’t help himself. Klaus looked around the operating theater as it erupted in applause. He gulped and glanced down at the sharp knife that was in his hands. He couldn’t control himself but he began to shake.
“As I’m sure you’ve heard, a cranioectomy is a procedure in which the patient’s head is removed.” Olaf explained as Esme pushed to center stage a large mobile diagram. She waved to the audience as she pulled down one of the few slides and showed a detailed diagram of a human head. “Scientists have discovered that many health problems are rooted in the brainial area.” Olaf continued to explain. “So the best thing to do for the patient is to remove the head altogether.”
Klaus looked horrified towards Olaf as he spoke. He simply shook his head in terror as he glanced back down at Violet. Esme took the time to pull the diagram’s draw-string releasing it. The slides of the diagram rolled back to its initial state quickly causing Klaus to jump at the sudden noise.
“Now, a cranioectomy is as dangerous as it is necessary. There is a chance that the patient,” he began as he turned menacingly towards Klaus. “May tragically die during the operation. Leaving their enormous fortune up for grabs. But sometimes we make sacrifices in the name of advancement.” As he said this, he stepped closer towards Violet and stroked her cheek and even ran a couple of fingers across her neck causing Klaus’ anger to boil once more. “Isn’t that so, Dr. Faustus?” he asked in a braggy tone as he turned towards Klaus.
Klaus began to breathe heavily as he looked from Olaf who was standing next to his sister’s gurney and Esme who was blocking the nearest exit. He glanced around the operating theater looking at all of the people who were eagerly awaiting him to cut off his sister’s head. He felt his legs becoming jello as he held the rusty knife limply in one hand. He walked a few steps away from Violet’s gurney, away from Olaf, and he put his free hand over his mouth to hide the fact that he was talking and at the same time to echo his words in hopes of Sunny being able to hear him.
“Sunny...what do we do?” he cried helplessly. “I’m surrounded by people who expect me to saw Violet’s head off.”
Sunny looked up at Klaus, cringed when she remembered how Violet looked on the gurney, and then she took a deep breath as she tried to think of something...anything that they could do. “Stall?” she suggested.
The word ‘stall’ has two meaning, but as with most words with two meanings, you can figure out which meaning is being used by looking at the situation. The word ‘stall’ , for example could refer to a place where horses are kept, but Klaus knew at once that Sunny meant something more along the lines of, “We’ll try to postpone the operation as long as we can,” and he nodded silently in agreement. The middle orphan took a deep breath and closed his eyes, trying to think of something that could help him postpone the cranioectomy, and all at once he thought of something he had read.
When you read as many books as Klaus Baudeliare, you are going to learn a great deal of information that might not be useful for a long time. But then suddenly like a strike of lightning, or a grand piano falling out of a window, the opportunity arises to use the infromation gleaned from even the most unlikely piece of reading. “Before I make the first incision,” Klaus called out to the audience nervously. “I...I...I think...I think I should talk a little bit about the equipment I’m using.”
Olaf looked at Klaus unamused as he folded his arms across his chest. Klaus walked around Violet’s gurney towards the anesthetic machine making sure not to look at it and making sure to not make it obvious what he was planning to do.
In the case of Klaus Baudelaire, it was an obscure book from the Baudelaire library, The Complete and Total History of Knives. Klaus raised the rusty, sharp knife higher showing it off to the crowd. Knowing fully that his hands were shaking the entire time. “Th-this is a knife.” he explained.
Olaf rolled his eyes tiresomely. “We know it’s a knife,” he explained coldly to Klaus. “ Now let’s see you use it,” he hissed as he glared at the young boy.
Klaus glared back at the man nervously. “Any real doctor would never perform a procedure without explaining everything first. And we are both real doctors, aren’t we?” He looked pointedly at Olaf as he asked the question. Olaf opened his mouth to say something but instead gave Klaus a low inhumane growl. He frowned towards the young boy but took a deep breath smiling towards the crowd. He looked back at Klaus, who smirked back at him. Olaf took another deep breath and gave Klaus a toothy grin. “Keep it short, Doctor.” he ordered as he allowed Klaus to continue on.
Klaus took a deep breath before addressing the crowd once more. “The knife is the oldest surgical tool in the world. Early knives have been found in Egyptian tombs and Mayan temples,” he explained as he noticed that Esme was playing with her fingernails and already yawning and Olaf had turned his back to the boy to mouth something to his henchpeople. Klaus took this time to slowly back up towards the anesthesia machine. He reached it with no problem, glanced back at both villains, who were still distracted, and flipped the switch from ON to OFF. “Where they were used for ceremonial purposes, and mostly fashioned out of stone. Gradually bronze and iron became the essential materials in knives, ,although some cultures fashioned them out of the incisors of slain animals.” Klaus was surprised that even when fighting back a panic attack for the most part he was still able to infodump about the random things he had read in books so many years ago.
Fearing that it wouldn’t be enough to help his sister gain consciousness quick enough, Klaus leaned back as far as he can, still glancing between the two villains and unhooked the tube that connected from the machine to Violet’s mask. Violet shifted only slightly and only barely. It was so bare that Klaus hadn’t even noticed it. “There are many different types of knives,” Klaus said as he leaned back against Violet’s gurney as if he was trying to relax. Olaf turned towards the boy and looked at him confused. “Which I’m going to list for you now…”
Olaf growled again as he dropped his head in disappointment. “ Do you ever shut up?!” he hissed for only Klaus and Sunny to hear. Klaus smirked as he continued to slowly walk around the front of Violet’s gurney, holding the knife in his shaky hands.
“There’s the pen knife, the pocket knife, the drawing knife, the...the...the butter knife,” Klaus listed as he felt Olaf’s grip on his shoulder.
“What a lengthy explanation, ladies and gentleman!” Olaf yelled in annoyance as Klaus’ eyes widened again. Klaus shook his head slowly, looking towards Olaf trying one last time to plead with his eyes. “But it’s time for the main event!”
Klaus’ pleading eyes vanished into a glare as the crowd around him began to applaud. He looked around the room wishing that the audience could see through Olaf’s ridiculous games.
“Yes!” Esme shouted, obviously losing her patience with Klaus’ stalling. “I think all these lovely people will understand the process better once,” she turned toward Klaus, a face full of no emotion at all. It was a chilling face. It made Klaus’ skin crawl. “The head has been removed.”
Klaus looked to Esme with frightened eyes as he looked from her to his older sister. Violet moved on her gurney, ever so slightly. Her mouth opened a little wider under the mask, and one of her limp fingers stirred briefly. The motions were so small that Klaus noticed them. He gave a small smile. Could he keep stalling until the anesthesia completely wore off?
“ Do it!” Esme demanded.
“Yeah! Cut off her head!” someone in the crowd shouted. Klaus could hear a few more people in the crowd agree.
Olaf gestured towards Violet’s gurney. “ Do it!” he hissed. Klaus walked over towards Violet’s gurney.
His sister looked so helpless. He wanted nothing more for her to wake up and help him out of this mess. But as he stared at her, she only moved her hand again, just barely.
“Be-before I...before I can…” Klaus stuttered. “I...I…”
The crowd around him murmured in agreement as Olaf and Esme continued to chant ‘Do it’ as if that alone would make Klaus cut off his sister’s head. He looked back down at Violet with pleading eyes. “Vi...please wake up,” he whispered worriedly. He cautiously poked at his sister’s arm hoping that the slight touch would be enough to annoy her awake.
Klaus listened in horror as Olaf’s troupe followed along with Esme and Olaf’s chanting and soon the entirety of the Operating Theater was chanting alongside the villains. Klaus slowly turned in a complete circle, looking around at the audience and the two villains who were on stage alongside him. He was pleading with everyone in the crowd silently, even trying to plead with Esme and Olaf. Even Sunny, who the whole time had been doing her best to keep her anxious brother calm, was starting to shake and tremble at the overstimulation that was happening in the theater. The poorly lit room was becoming darker and darker as Klaus turned in complete circles as the noise around him got louder and louder. Olaf glared at him as he hissed for Klaus to saw off his sister’s head and Esme clapped and chanted as loud as she could. She seemed more eager for this to happen than Olaf was. Olaf seemed to have been going with the flow since it seemed as though Esme had changed up his plans a bit.
Klaus nodded slowly towards Olaf as he stepped close to Violet. He clasped the knife in both hands as he began to hold it up over his helpless sister. He could feel tears starting to stream slowly down his face as he studied her gurney and tried to think of any escape routes. The only one he could clearly see was the one Esme was still blocking. He looked down at Violet’s sleeping figure and wondered if he could make a very small cut on Violet’s neck, one that could merely wake her up but wouldn’t injure her in the slightest. He looked at the rusty blade, which was shaking up and down as his hands and body began to tremble from his fear and anxiety. He didn’t like being so close to Olaf at all, let alone with sharp tools anywhere near. He hated not being able to control the situation, he had tried to stall but Olaf and Esme had ruined any and all attempts at that. He hated the fact that the operating theater had become too loud and too over stimulating. So he couldn’t help but start to slightly fall apart. There was no way in Hell that he was going to actually saw off Violet’s head. Surely, Olaf and Esme knew this. Neither of them could truly believe that he would.
Was this Olaf’s plan? To make him surrender? To expose Klaus and Sunny to the crowd? Or was his plan to actually have Klaus murder his big sister? Klaus was so confused and that might be the thing that was upsetting him the most. He didn’t like not understanding something. Sure, Olaf’s plan rarely ever made sense but this one took the cake. What was killing Violet going to help Olaf gain? He has to want me to give in. It’s just sick mind games with him. He wants to know that he’s won.
Sunny took this time to take another sneak peek from inside her brother’s medical coat. It’s like the youngest orphan hadn’t learned her lesson from the last time she took a sneak peek because as she slowly pulled the fabric of the medical coat apart, she took her own look at a sleeping Violet and then gasped when she realized that her brother was now holding the knife over Violet. Sunny looked up at Klaus with wide, wide eyes. Thankfully, for the middle orphan he was unable to see the face Sunny was giving him.
The crowd around the two Baudelaires began to get louder and louder. Olaf even stepping closer and closer to Klaus demanding for him to cut off his sister’s head. Klaus was crying trying to get everyone around him to stop chanting. He turned towards Violet once more and noticed how her face flinched slightly. He could have swarn he heard a soft but desperate ‘no’ come from her mouth under the mask but he had no way of knowing for sure.
Klaus looked towards Olaf with a look of utter defeat and fear. Klaus bowed his head down as Olaf began to smirk. “I...I can’t do it,” he whispered, looking up at the ceiling. High above them was a swuare intercom speaker that he had not noticed before and teh sight of the speaker made him think of something. “ I can’t do it,” he announced depressingly towards the crowd.
“ Why not?” Olaf asked in a vicious but taunting manner.
Klaus swallowed, hoping he still sounded confident and not like a scared child. “I...I cannot perform this operation, there’s one thing thtat has to be done, the most important thing we do here at Heimlich Hospital.”
“And what might that be?” Olaf hissed annoyed.
“P-p-paperwork,” Klaus replied nervously.
Olaf looked towards the teen boy irritated and tired as the entire crowd around them gasped and agreed with Klaus. Klaus smiled and addressed the crowd. “We haven’t done the paperwork!”
“Paperwork! Yes, of course!” a nurse shouted happily.
“Somebody call Hal!” suggested a doctor. “He’s in charge of the Library of Records, so he can solve this paperwork problem.”
“I will! I’ll go get him right now!” One of the Volunteers Fighting Disease called out as she stood up from her seat. Klaus was unhappy to learn she was the one who had early been so eager to see him cut his sister’s head off.
“Just a brief pause, ladies and gentleman,” Olaf called out to the audience as they began to murmur amongst themselves. He angrily turned to Klaus, “ a minor interruption!” he hissed frustratedly. Olaf glared towards the disguised orphans and angrily sighed.
Klaus took this time to grab Olaf’s arm. “Let my sister go,” he hissed.
Olaf gave a low chuckle, Klaus gripped his arm tighter. “You only need one of us,” Klaus said as he looked down at where Sunny was and then once again at Violet. He took a deep breath. He looked from Olaf and then towards Esme, who seemed to be quietly debating what her next move will be. He closed his eyes, trying to blink his tears away. “...take me,” he whispered. “Just...leave my sisters alone.” The second the sentence left his mouth, Sunny punched him as hard as she could from underneath the medical coat which caused Klaus to grunt and heave over a bit.
Olaf smirked towards Klaus. “Why would I trade the... prettiest orphan for you?” he asked. “I mean...torturing you is... fun. But she’s…”
Klaus’ eyes went red with anger. “Don’t you dare finish that sentence,” he interrupted.
Esme’s eyes glowed with another idea. She smiled towards the crowd, waving and smiling to them as she walked towards Klaus. Once she reached him, she grabbed his shoulders, purposely digging her nails as much as she could pulling him slightly towards her.
“Ow!” he whispered angrily, glaring at the sinister woman, who looked back at him with crazy eyes.
“ Clever boy, you may have found a way to stall but sooner or later the show will go on and there will be blood! ” the vile woman hissed into Klaus’ ear. Klaus could feel Sunny slightly tremble at Esme’s words.
Be Violet. Do the scary thing first and get scared later. He told himself as he took a deep breath, trying his absolute best not to react to Esme’s threat. He slightly turned towards her. She gave him a smile laced with cruelty and bad intentions. Klaus’ breathing was becoming uneven as Esme continued to stare at him with her crazy eyes.
“... unless… ” she said smiling.
“Unless?” Both Klaus and Olaf repeated simultaneously. Klaus repeated it with a strange mix of worry and relief in his voice. He didn’t know what Esme wanted but as he glanced once more at his sleeping sister, he knew that whatever it was he would have to give it to her. While Olaf’s voice was a mix of confusion with a hint of anger.
“You give me what I want,” she explained, still holding a firm grip on the young boy. Klaus looked at her with confusion in his eyes. She sighed angrily. “I will stop this whole operation, right now, if you give me the item that you three thieves stole from the Library of Records.” she explained.
“Why would we stop anything...the whole point of this is to…” Olaf hissed under his breath, through gritted teeth as he glared at his girlfriend.
“ It’s mine!” Esme hissed, interrupting Olaf and leaning closer to Klaus’ ear. “ Mine...mine...mine...mine.”
“You stupid bitch what the fuck do you think you are doing?” Olaf hissed under his breath.
Klaus turned from the two villains, who were on either side of him and towards the gurney looking at his bound and unconscious sister once more. He weighed his options. He wanted desperately to know what else was on that film and he had no intentions of ever letting Olaf or Esme find out what Jacques Snicket had said about a survivor of a fire. But if Esme was willing to trade Violet’s life for a measly film then he knew what he had to do. “...if...if it’ll save Violet...then…” he could feel Sunny nodding as if she was telling him he was doing the right thing as he reached into his pocket and took out the Snicket file. He slowly reached his hand into his pocket, Esme watched in sweet anticipation as he lifted the object from his pocket and handed it to Esme.
Esme began to squeal happily as Olaf rolled his eyes and threw his head back in annoyance. “Oh, at last!” she gasped as she began to kiss the object in her hand. Klaus watched the villainess with a look of pure confusion as she continued to cheer about possessing the Snicket file.
Esme’s cheering was cut short when her eyes widened with both anger and confusion when she realized that the object she was holding was not what she wanted at all. She held the film in her palm as she released her fingers from gripping the film. She stared angrily at the film. “This...this...this...this isn’t the sugar bowl…” she said in a monotone voice. She looked up at Klaus about ready to rip the knife from his hands and run him and Sunny through.
“S-s-sugar bowl?” Klaus repeated confused. “That’s...that’s the Snicket file,”
Olaf’s face lit up as he cocked his head. Before Esme or Klaus could react, he reached out and grabbed hold of the file. “The Snicket file? What’s this?” he asked as he turned it every which way in his hands examining it.
Klaus looked ready to cry. If he had known that Esme didn’t want the film and wanted a sugar bowl he would have given her anything else but as he watched Olaf’s frown turn into a grin, he felt sick to his stomach. Olaf didn’t even know about the Snicket file and now he has it. What have I done? He asked.
“ You…” Esme hissed as her crazy eyes formed a glare Klaus’ way. Klaus looked from the murderous woman to Olaf.
“Now let Violet go!” He hissed.
Olaf smirked towards Esme as he turned to face the crowd. “Ladies and Gentleman!” he yelled. “It has come to my attention that this man is an impostor.”
Klaus’ eyes widened when he realized just what Olaf was doing. The crowd gasped. Klaus looked towards Olaf with pleading eyes, shaking his head rapidly. Esme turned on yet another one of the bright lights, this one pointing towards Klaus instead of Violet, whose eyes were slowly starting to open. She was mouthing something but no one on stage was paying attention to the bound girl on the gurney.
“He is not a doctor at all!” Olaf explained, smiling wickedly towards Klaus.
“Y-yes I am,” Klaus cried. “You said so yourself,”
“He’s two children, neither of which have graduated from medical school!” Olaf said reaching out towards Klaus trying to rip his medical coat open. Klaus quickly turned away from Olaf, now facing Esme.
“I-I-in my m-medical opinion,” Klaus said nervously as he watched Esme lean down and grab one of her stiletto heels. She smiled wickedly at Klaus. “I believe these two have lost their minds.”
“Oh, we haven’t lost our minds,” Esme called out with a snarl, “But you’re about to lose your heads, Baudelaires!” she hissed as she swung her heel at Klaus’ medical coat, cutting it apart with ease. The harness that held Sunny was cut, too and Sunny fell to the ground with a thud!
“Sunny!” Klaus cried as Sunny rolled on her back examining herself. Esme’s shoe may have been sharp and long enough to cut through both Klaus’ medical coat and Sunny’s harness but as Sunny examined the front of her outfit, she learned that thankfully she was unscatched by Esme’s shoe. She looked up at her brother and gave him a thumbs up.
Olaf grabbed Klaus’ shoulder and turned him around for the whole crowd to see. “Oh my God!” Olaf cried in an exaggerated tone. “It’s that Baudelaire boy!” he roughly ripped the fake beard from Klaus’ face.
“Baudelaire?” a doctor in the crowd called out. “The same Baudelaire that’s wanted for kidnapping and murder?”
Klaus looked around the crowd and watched as the crowd gasped as they recognized both him and Sunny from The Daily Punctilio. The doctors, nurses, and spectators in the crowd looked at them in horror, only the Volunteers Fighting Disease, who believed that no news was goods news, did not recognize the youngsters.
“That is the Baudelaire boy!” a nurse cried. “I read about them in The Daily Punctilio!”
“He’s a murderer!” Olaf cried as Klaus glared at him. “He helped kill Count Olaf!”
“Who?” Brandon asked.
Olaf rolled his eyes. “He...He’s a very handsome actor,”
“I might not be a doctor but I didn’t kill anybody!” Klaus cried to the crowd, who were all glaring at him now.
“Wait! Weren’t there two murderous kidnapping orphans? Not one?” a spectator asked. “Where’s the girl orphan?”
Esme hurriedly stepped in front of the gurney, shielding Violet from view. “She’s...already in jail,”
“ She is not!” Klaus cried as he rushed up towards Violet’s gurney and with his free hand, he brushed her hair out of her eyes so that everyone could see that she was not Kit Litencoves but actually Violet Snicket. “ These terrible people disguised my sister so they could chop off her head!”
“No...no...no…” Violet pleaded, she slowly but frantically was moving her head, she was trying to move her hands but she couldn’t. Klaus looked towards his sister, who was slowly waking up. He couldn’t help but smile even if she seemed to be having her own panic attack.
“Violet!” Klaus cried happily. Sunny looked up at the gurney happily as well.
Olaf and Esme looked at one another and smirked. “Don’t be ridiculous!” Esme called out. “ You’re the one trying to cut her head off. Look, you’re still holding the knife!”
“See, the poor girl is freaking out. She thought she could trust you,” Olaf hissed.
“ I wasn’t trying to kill Violet!” Klaus hissed angrily as Violet was trying her best to escape. She moved her head slowly but frantically from side to side, slowly pulling desperately at her restraints.
“If you’re not murderers,” a doctor asked, “then why have you sneaked into the hospital in disguise and why were you hiding your kidnap victim?” she asked as she pointed at Sunny.
“Brother!” Sunny screamed out, pointing at Klaus. She then pointed towards Violet. “Sister!”
But no one listened to the toddler as another person entered the operating theater. “I think I can explain that,” said the person, it was a familiar voice. But Klaus and Sunny weren’t sure if this was a good thing or a bad thing. In one hand, he was clutching the rings of keys that that three siblings had made from paper clips and Violet’s hair ribbon, and with the other hand he was pointing angrily at the children. “I’m glad to see that you are still here, although you all are a bit blurry. I thought for sure you would have snuck away after your prolonged and treacherous vandalism.”
“Vandalism!?” a doctor cried. “That’s terrible!”
“B-but…” Klaus cried out, backing up into Violet’s gurney.
“It was terrible,”
“Hal…” Sunny began but both she and Klaus were speechless. They both knew they had wronged Hal and that he had every right to be mad at them for tricking him, although Esme was the one who had actually destroyed his library, not them.
“Those two murderous kidnappers and their toddler victim,” Hal said, “pretended to be volunteers in order to work in the Library of Records.”
“They did?” Esme cried, feigning a fake gasp. Klaus and Sunny both glared at her. “You mean they’re murderous kidnappers and phony volunteers?”
“No wonder they didn’t know the words to the song!” Brandon cried.
“Taking advantage of my poor eyesight,” Hal continued, pointing at his glasses. “They made these fake keys and switched it with the real one, so they could sneak into my library and destroy any files about their crimes.”
“No...no…” Violet cried out, Klaus and Sunny doubted she was responding to Hal because she seemed to still be drowsy as if she had no idea what was going on still.
“Hal…” Klaus began as he looked back at Sunny and Violet. Sunny only hung her head in shame as Violet continued to drowsily whimper.
“I thought you three were my friends,” Hal cried.
“We didn’t want to destroy the file,” Klaus explained nervously. “We didn’t mean to destroy anything. I-I’m sorry...we...we tricked you. And I am so sorry about your library,” Klaus said in saddened tone. “B-but we’re not the real criminals here... we’re just kids...trying to survive.” He ran his hand through his hair nervously, glancing around the crowd to see if anyone was believing him. Unfortunately for Klaus, just like when Count Olaf had first accused him and Violet of murder, the crowd before him now looked like the crowd that he dealt with then, when he glanced around the crowd he couldn’t see one face that indicated someone was believing them or that they were on the kids’ side. Not even Hal. He took a deep breath. “The real criminals are…” he began as he glanced around the stage to notice that one person had snuck out when Hal had entered. “No...no…he...he was…” Klaus spun around in confusion. His eyes locked on the rest of the troupe and Esme but he couldn’t locate Olaf. “ Where’s Count Olaf?”
since we know that whatever is in the sugar bowl will prove lemony innocent and olaf guilty, and must be "safely and securely contained" according to esme, do you think the sugar bowl could possibly contain one of the poisonous plants mentioned in /post/140110102380 ? a small sample might have fit in it, right? and it certainly doesn't explain everything, but is the idea worth entertaining?
I think you’re kind of jumping to conclusions when you assume that the sugar bowl will prove Lemony innocent and Olaf guilty. It’s probably the wording of this passage you’re alluding to:
I have at last learned the whereabouts of theevidence that will exonerate me, a phrase which here means “prove tothe authorities that it is Count Olaf, and not me, who has started so many fires.” Your suggestion, somany years ago at that picnic, that a tea set would be a handy place to hide anything important and small in theevent of a dark day, has turned out to be correct.[The Slippery Slope, Chapter Five]
Although the two sentences are in proximity, there is no definitive proof that the sugar bowl contains the evidence Lemony needs. Actually the idea is also undermined by the role of the Snicket file:
“The Snicket file!” he said, in a hushedwhisper.“It’s all here,” the woman said. “Everychart, every map and every photograph from the only file that could put us all in jail.”[The Slippery Slope, Chapter Six]
These characters know what the sugar bowl contains, so they wouldn’t be saying that if the sugar bowl contained another file devoted to Olaf’s crimes.
Now back to the article you mentioned (Link). Olaf did steal one of the Royal Gardens’ poisonous plants but the sugar bowl mystery goes back several years before that theft, when Beatrice and Lemony were still engaged.
I must caution you about this next chapter. This is the chapter where we continue to explore creepy undertones pertaining to Olaf as a character. If you are not comfortable with reading about predatory behavior, comments ranging from vague to slightly explicit (on the topic of these predatory behaviors), a young girl being restrained, a young girl being threatened, threats to a minor, or vague to slightly specific comments about pedophilia, a creepy fuck stroking a young girl's hair, cheek, and leg... I would suggest skipping specific parts of this chapter. This happens on Violet's part of the chapter.
Please read with caution. If anything becomes too triggering or makes you too uncomfortable I am happy to summarize in vague details (when going over certain parts) so you are still able to follow the story. Please if you can't read this chapter in its entirely, I will be more than happy to explain the events of the chapter in a less descriptive way.
_______________________________________________________________
Friendly Reminder:
I, Susan, the author of Misery Loves Company also wants to make it abundantly clear that THE TOPICS/TRIGGERS IN THIS CHAPTER are things I frown upon entirely. I do NOT condone pedophilia at all, whatsoever. And I believe it is NOW in my fic that I will say this: if you ship the disgusting vile mess of a 'ship' that is Violaf...I would prefer if you stop interacting with my page, my story, and any of my works. Just because I put it in my story does not mean I condone it. I am using it as a element to explain why this sort of shit is WRONG.
If we are being abundantly honest, it is these segments that I have the hardest time writing and editing. It is a long, hard process and it never gets easier. No matter how vague the comment Olaf or even Esme make is, it is never easy. It makes my blood boil, my skin crawl and my stomach churn.
I don't feel right saying 'enjoy' because this is a tough pill to swallow.
So read with caution. Let me know if you feel I went too far or if you just want to comment like normal.
I am not perfect. I am open to criticism. I just needed to make sure all my readers understand where I stand on the topic of Count Olaf's creepy ass infatuation to Violet.
Read with caution. Love the support you guys have given this fic.
-Susan.
Chapter Fifty-Four:
The One With Dr. Faustus and Anagrams
Klaus Baudelaire glanced in the mirror one last time. It’s now or never. He told himself. He glanced down cautiously. “How you doing in there, Sunshine?”
“Claustro,” she explained, which was her way of saying, “A bit claustrophobic,”
“We can think of another way…” he began but he felt Sunny shake her head.
“I’ll manage,” she replied. “Save Vi,”
He took one more deep breath as he carefully made his way into the hallway. Both siblings heard the cheerful singing of the Volunteers Fighting Disease just down the hallway. “ We sing while walking down the hall and then consult our list, to see the names of anyone who just might have a cyst.” The children could hear Brandon Spats and the other volunteers sing.
“Patient list,” Sunny whispered to her brother.
“You’re right, Sunny,” Klaus whispered back. “The volunteers have a list of all the patients. If Olaf and Esme are still here then they have to be disguising Violet as a patient.”
“Exactly,”
“Maybe we can get Brandon to give us a look at his list,” Klaus said hopefully. Now or never. He told himself again as the volunteers began to walk past him and Sunny. He closed his eyes. Violet would do this for you. He told himself. “Here goes nothing,” he whispered as low as he can so only Sunny can hear him. He straightened his posture but did not turn to face the volunteers. “Uh, you!” he called out in his regular voice. He immediately had to fight the urge to facepalm as he realized that a doctor wouldn’t sound like a teenage boy. “You...you...you,” he repeated out loud doing his best to deepen his voice so that none of the volunteers would recognize him.
“Me, sir?” Brandon asked as he turned around. The volunteers around him all followed suit and stopped singing as they all turned to face Klaus.
“Yes, you,” Klaus said in his deep voice. He was trying his best to give a sort of British accent to his disguise, afraid that artificially deepening his voice wouldn’t be enough. He could barely look Brandon in the eyes. He could feel his heart beating in his chest. He had to fool the volunteers, if he couldn’t fool them then how could he ever fool Olaf or Esme? “I have misplaced my patient list,” Klaus explained, still unable to look anyone in the eyes. “And I was wondering if we could...If I could have yours?”
“My patient list?” Brandon repeated in a saddened tone. He clutched his clipboard to his chest. He looked around to his fellow volunteers who all looked at Klaus as if he had just broken each of their hearts. “But patient lists are precious.”
“Yes,” Klaus replied, focusing his eyes on the patient list. “Precious to you...but vital for me,”
Brandon frowned. “You do have a good point,” he said finally. He looked at several of his volunteers who nodded their heads at him. “No frowny faces, you guys,” he said as he began to hand his clipboard to Klaus. “We can just get another one from…” his eyes narrowed on a figure down the hall behind Klaus. “Oh hello, other doctor,” Brandon said as he gripped tighter to his clipboard. Klaus’ eyes went wide when he heard Brandon call out to another doctor.
Please no. Please no. Klaus thought to himself. Daring to not turn around. It wasn’t until he heard the familiar wheezy voice where Klaus’ heart plummeted to the ground.
“Yes?” the other doctor said from down the hall.
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. To make matters worse, Klaus could feel Sunny starting to shake in the little harness that held her to his chest. Klaus wanted to run down the hall and hide but he knew he couldn’t. Maybe I can follow him back to wherever he’s storing Violet? He thought but he knew that was a risky plan. It would do him better if he stayed in front of the group of volunteers that way Olaf would not be able to grab him and Sunny since there were witnesses. Klaus slowly turned around to see Olaf walking down the hall towards him, the vile man’s eyes were narrowed as though he was concentrating on something.
When Klaus had turned around, Olaf had stopped in his tracks. He was now only a few steps away from Klaus. The middle orphan guessed that Olaf was trying to sneak up on him and was caught off guard by Klaus turning around, but he couldn’t be too sure. He hoped that his disguise was fooling Olaf but he had many doubts.
“Perhaps you can help this first doctor I was talking to,” Brandon said cheerfully. Happy that he didn’t have to hand over his patient list after all.
Klaus turned slightly back towards Brandon, not allowing Olaf to have any chance at a sneak attack. “No, no,” Klaus said in his disguised voice. “No need to bother this man.”
Klaus felt a hand on his shoulder as he tensed up. “It’s no bother at all, doctor,” Olaf said in his ridiculous disguise voice. “How may I be of service to you two fine gentlemen?”
The young boy was rendered speechless and was fighting himself internally. Doing his best not to shake, tremble, or even run away from Olaf who held a firm grip on his shoulder. Klaus even tried to hide behind his own hand, hoping that that would create a barrier that would protect his identity from Olaf but alas to no avail.
“He lost his patient list,” Brandon explained after realizing Klaus wasn’t going to speak. “So he can’t find his patients.”
“Is that so?” Olaf asked, his hand gripping Klaus’ shoulder harsher than before. “I know how it feels to misplace something,”
Klaus winced in pain slightly, pushing Olaf’s hand from his shoulder. Klaus could feel Sunny shake full force now which wasn’t helping him at all because he was still fighting every urge to shake. You gotta be strong. Do it for your sisters. He told himself. What would Violet do? Would Violet cower? Would Violet run? No. Violet holds her ground, especially with Olaf.
He slowly turned to face Olaf. It was much more difficult of a task than he had thought. He had to continuously ask himself ‘What would Violet do?’.
“You know, you look very familiar, ” Olaf said, his shiny eyes glaring at the young boy. Olaf was trying to look the boy directly in the eyes but Klaus continued to glance around, never allowing his eyes to continuously gaze at anything for longer than ten seconds. “What is your name, Doctor? ”
“M-my name...is Dr. Faustus,” Klaus choked out after stuttering over his words. He continued to use his deep British accent in hopes of maybe convincing Olaf that he was mistaken. Although, Klaus could tell Olaf could see right through his disguise. He still made sure to not look the villain in his eyes.
Olaf’s eyebrow raised as he held in a laugh. Klaus didn’t understand what Olaf found to be so funny. At least Klaus was able to come up with a name that actually sounded like it was an actual name right on the spot. The best that Olaf could come up with was Dr. Medical-School. If anyone should be laughing, it would be Klaus and Sunny. “Dr. Faustus?”
Klaus slowly nodded and extended a hand towards his worst enemy. “Dr. Colin Faustus MD.”
Olaf glanced down at Klaus’ hand and narrowed his eyes. He gave the young boy a cruel smirk as he gripped his hand, shaking it slowly. He gripped the middle orphan’s hand tightly as he stared directly at him. “You look terribly young to be a doctor. Where did you attend medical school, Doctor... Faustus. ”
“Uh…” Klaus stammered as he realized that Olaf’s handshake was causing him to tremble or maybe it was Sunny already shaking that was causing him to shake. He couldn’t tell anymore. He felt like his legs were going to give out. He was holding in his panic attack. “Ox...Oxf-ford,” he stuttered until he felt a tiny hand crawl up his sleeve and grab at his arm, the closest it could get to his hand. He gave a small smile realizing what Sunny was trying to do. What would Violet do? He asked himself again. As he took a deep breath. “Oxford, obviously,” he said confidently.
Olaf looked towards the boy crossly. “Huh? ‘Oxford’,” the villain snickered. “Sounds made-up,”
The volunteers laughed alongside Olaf as Klaus looked at everyone in disbelief. “It is not,” he whined in his regular voice. Shit. he thought as his eyes widened when he saw Olaf’s grin appear larger. If Olaf wasn’t already completely convinced that the ‘doctor’ standing before him was Klaus Baudelaire, then Klaus had just confirmed it entirely. “I..I mean,” he said resuming his deep British accent, “Dr. Medical School, may I have a peek at your list?”
Olaf smiled. “ Tell you what, ” the man snarled. “Why don’t you follow me back to my otherwise deserted office, and I’ll make you a copy,” before Klaus could decline that offer, he began to roughly poke at Klaus’ chest and stomach as if trying to find exactly where Sunny was at. After Olaf had poked him three times, Klaus could hear a tiny, but fearful whimper as he swatted Olaf’s hand away from his sister. He glared at Olaf, who only smiled back at him. “Looks like you could use the exercise,”
“There’s no time to lose,” Klaus explained in his disguise voice. “I have a patient in need of medicine,”
Olaf merely smirked. “That’s so funny,” he explained, his eyes shining as if he was about ready to tell a joke. “Cause so do I,”
Klaus and Sunny could both feel their hearts shift in their chests. Klaus became speechless.
“Maybe you can assist me with my patient,” Olaf suggested with a shrug of his shoulders. “I mean if you care. ”
“I...I…” Klaus started. “I would love to…”
Olaf grabbed ahold of Klaus’ arm. “Alrighty then, let’s go Dr. Faustus,”
“B-but,”
“But what? ” Olaf hissed glaring from Klaus to the group of volunteers, who he wished would go away so he could easily kidnap the two remaining orphans.
“My patient really needs their medicine,” Klaus explained.
“Well, my patient is in critical condition.” Olaf hissed.
Klaus’ eyes widened. No, she’s not. He wouldn’t harm her...he needs her alive to get her dad’s money. Klaus told himself over and over. “...my patient...desperately needs their medication,” Klaus tried again. “Or else they’ll die,”
Olaf looked ready to murder Klaus, he kept a firm grip on the boy’s arm. “I don’t know, Doctor. I feel like it’d be a lot easier for everyone involved if you were to come with me, right now.” Olaf tried to pull Klaus along but the thirteen-year-old stood in defiance, pulling back. Olaf let out a low growl and a heavy sigh. He leaned in closer to Klaus’ ear. “But Doctor Faustus, my patient is dying to see you,” the vile man hissed loud enough for both Klaus and Sunny to hear but apparently not loud enough where any of the Volunteers Fighting Disease could hear him. Sunny gave another low whimper as Klaus closed his eyes and took a deep breath. Do not break down. You are stronger than he is. What would Violet do?
“Dr. Medical-School, my patient is in urgent need of their medicine,” he said again, this time agitated. Olaf looked at him in shock as the young boy roughly shook his arm from the man’s grasp. As he repeated himself, Olaf rolled his eyes as the bookworm spoke. Klaus turned towards the volunteers, “and...you...you wouldn’t want all these witnesses to know you let a patient die on your watch now, would you, Dr. Medical School.” Klaus rolled his eyes at his enemy’s ridiculous disguise name.
Olaf angrily sighed and glared at Klaus, who glared back at him. Olaf’s eye twitched in annoyance as Klaus was pushing down all his fear. It was a quick glare off, but Klaus was doing his very best to show Olaf that right now, he means business. That right now, with Violet down for the count, Klaus was the one that he shouldn’t mess with. It might not have been working to the degree that Klaus was hoping but it was keeping Olaf from downright snatching him and Sunny. Klaus just prayed that Esme wouldn’t show up or anyone else in Olaf’s vile troupe that would serve as back-up.
“You both seem pretty legit, to be honest,” Brandon said cheerfully. “You’re both wearing medical coats.”
Both Klaus and Olaf gave the man a puzzled look but didn’t say anything. “Just a quick glance,” Klaus said to Olaf. He watched as the villain smirked.
“Fine,” he said. “I like a challenge, anyway,” he muttered, shrugging his shoulders. Klaus heard him loud and clear but he was too distracted by wanting to get his hands on the patient list that he didn’t have time to question or imagine what Olaf meant by that. He gave Klaus a taunting smile as he held up his clipboard. Klaus reached out for it as Olaf spun it around quickly still keeping a firm grasp on it. Olaf lowered the clipboard and his hands so Klaus had no way of getting the list. “ There, ” he said slyly towards Klaus. “I saved a life today.”
Klaus was speechless as he stared at Olaf. “B...but...I didn’t…” he said in his regular voice.
“Sorry, you asked for a quick glance,” Olaf explained slyly, with a shrug of his shoulders. Olaf grabbed onto Klaus’ shoulder again, leaning in once more to whisper to the teen boy. “Don’t worry though, I’ll see you real soon,” he whispered as he patted Klaus on the back. The narcissistic man glanced up at the volunteers who were about to start clapping for him. “Please hold your applause,” he said as he gave Klaus a small wave. Klaus watched in disbelief as Olaf began walking away. “I’m just doing my job,” Olaf said as he passed through the group of volunteers, not even glancing back at the disguised children. “I mean, you could applaud a little bit,” he told the volunteers as they clapped and cheered him on. A smile grew on the vicious man’s face.
“But...but...my patient…” Klaus cried out in his disguise voice.
Olaf continued down the hall. “I have to attend to mine, Dr. Faustus,” he called back, still not turning around. “She’s a real...special one.”
“But…” the young boy cried out as Olaf turned the corner.
“The camaraderie at this hospital is really inspiring,” Brandon explained as he turned back to his fellow volunteers. “ Tra la la, fiddle dee dee. Hope you get well soon. Ha ha ha. Hee Hee Hee.” they sang as they walked away, leaving the two Baudelaire orphans alone.
Klaus took the opportunity to breathe heavily, allowing all the fear that he was holding back, finally come up to the surface. He trembled and shook rapidly. “I can’t do anything right,” he muttered to himself. He ran his hand through his hair nervously. He glanced down the empty hallway. He felt tears falling from his face. “I had one job. One fucking job and I failed. Just like always.” Klaus was trying to calm his nerves but he kept hearing Olaf’s warning in his head. “Now...we’ll never get our hands on that list.” he cried
“Wouldn’t say that,” Sunny said from inside Klaus’ medical coat.
Before he could question what his little sister meant, he watched her two tiny arms reach out from the bottom of his medical coat. When he saw what was in Sunny’s hands he didn’t have to ask for further explanation, he gave a small smile as he gently took Olaf’s patient list from Sunny’s hands. “Sunny, you are amazing,” he said happily.
“I know,” Sunny said. “I wish I could see his face,” she started giggling. “When he realizes.”
Just as she said that both children jumped in shock when they heard a loud, angry, inhumane growl from several hallways away followed by the sound of someone throwing a clipboard at a glass window, resulting in the window shattering.
“I think he just realized,” Klaus said laughing a bit.
Sunny burst out laughing. “Honestly, didn’t take as long as I thought,” she said in between her laughs. “I guess he does have a brain.”
The two children’s laughter halted when they heard a very loud, “ That’s it!”
“Shit,” Sunny muttered.
“I think we should hide now,” Klaus suggested.
“Good plan,” she said as she felt Klaus hurriedly walked into a supply closet. Like a church bell, coffin, and a vat of melted chocolate, a supply closet is rarely a comfortable place to hide, and this supply closet was no exception. When Klaus shut the door of the closet behind him, the two Baudelaire orphans found themselves in a small, cramped room lit only by one flickering lightbulb hanging from the ceiling. On one wall was a row of white medical coats hanging from hooks and on the opposite wall was a rusty sink where one could wash one’s hands before examining a patient. The rest of the closest was full of huge cans of alphabet soup for patients’ lunches, and small boxes of rubber bands, which the children could not imagine came in very handy in a hospital. He quickly unbuttoned his disguise to give his sister a chance to stretch her legs and breathe. He slowly untied the harness that held Sunny. Sunny slid down with ease as Klaus took off the fake beard and placed it to the side. “Well, it’s not comfortable, but at least nobody will find us in here.”
“Here’s hoping,” Sunny said as she kept an eye on the door behind her brother.
He began quickly scanning the page, reading off every name as quickly as he could. He flipped over the list with desperation. His hands beginning to tremble. Klaus had quickly noticed that the names were not in alphabetical order, which is the exact reason he began to read every single name on the list. Desperately looking for ‘Violet Snicket’ somewhere on the list. He flipped the page over and started again, believing he accidentally skipped over his sister’s name but as Klaus read the patient list for the third time, he could feel his heart sinking in his stomach. He angrily set the patient list down, half-tempted to rip it to shreds, but deciding against it. “ She’s not here.” he cried as he looked down at Sunny. “Violet’s name is nowhere on this list. How are we going to find her in this huge hospital, if we can’t figure out which ward she’s in?”
“Alias?” Sunny suggested as she glanced at the list. She wasn’t able to read like Klaus could but she knew her sister’s location was somewhere on this list.
“Good thinking,” Klaus replied. “Count Olaf often uses a ridiculous fake name.”
“Medical-School,” Sunny said rolling her eyes.
“Maybe...he made up a new name for Violet, so we couldn’t rescue her. But which person is Violet?” Klaus said.
Sunny shrugged her shoulders.
Klaus looked to Sunny with a frown on his face. “How are we going to figure out which name is hers?” he asked desperately as he was interrupted by the sound of crackly laughter, coming from over the Baudelaires’ heads. The two children nervously looked up and saw the square intercom speaker had been installed on the ceiling. “Attention!” Mattathias called out when he had stopped laughing. “Dr. Flacutono and associates, please report to the administrative office. Dr. Flacutono and associates, please report to the administrative office to prepare for your operation. ”
“Flacutono!” Sunny repeated.
“I recognize that name, too…but not entirely...it’s a little fuzzy,” Klaus explained. “Correct me if I’m wrong, but wasn’t that the false name Olaf’s henchman used in Paltryville?”
“Yep,” Sunny said frantically. “He said operation. What does he mean by that?”
But Klaus closed his eyes to concentrate, ignoring Sunny’s question.
“Klaus!” Sunny shrieked worriedly, not understanding why her brother had closed his eyes. “Our big sister is in grave danger! We have to find her!”
But again, Klaus didn’t answer his younger sister. He kept his eyes half-closed behind his glasses as they often were when he was trying to remember something that he had read. “Flacutono,” Klaus muttered quietly. “Flac-u-to-no,” His eyes shot open with realization as he frantically reached into his pocket, where he was keeping all the important papers he had gathered since his troubles first began. “Al Funcoot,” he said and took out one of the pages of Duncan’s notebooks. It was the page that had written on it the word ‘anagram’ a phrase that Klaus hadn’t understood until his big sister explained it to him. Boy, was he glad that she did? Klaus looked at the torn note and then at the list of patients as he continued to mutter ‘Flacutono’. Then he finally looked at Sunny, and she could see his eyes grow wide behind his glasses, the way they always did when he had read something very difficult, and understood it at last.
“Brain blast?” Sunny asked smiling.
“Why do you and Violet keep comparing me to Jimmy Neutron?” Klaus laughed as Sunny shrugged. “Doesn’t matter. What matters is I think I know how to find Violet,” Klaus said slowly as he glanced around the small closet. “But I’ll need your teeth, Sunshine.”
“Ready,” Sunny said, opening her mouth.
Klaus smiled and handed Sunny a can of alphabet soup. “Open this can of soup and hurry.”
Sunny took the can of soup from Klaus, looking at him confused. “No time to eat!” she screeched dumbfoundedly glancing at the can angrily. She didn’t understand what Klaus wanted with the soup but she was becoming angry with his refusal to take this seriously.
“We’re not going to eat it,” Klaus said calmly, kneeling down to Sunny’s level. “Look, Sunshine, I know I’m not good at making plans like you and Violet but trust me, please.” He put a gentle hand on his younger sister’s shoulder. “I need one of us to believe in me, and right now, it’s not going to be me. Can you do that for me?” he asked her.
Sunny looked from the can of soup to her brother still utterly confused but when she glanced at her brother’s sad eyes, she could tell that he was desperately pleading with her to give him confidence. The confidence that he needed to save Violet. She gave him a toothy grin as she began using her teeth to open the soup can for him.
“Thank you, Sunny,” Klaus said as she handed him the now opened can. He walked over to the sink and began to pour most of the contents of the can down the drain, making sure to keep all of the alphabet-shaped noodles.
“I’m still very lost,” Sunny admitted.
“Remember what Violet taught us about anagrams?” Klaus asked as he began to frantically search for the letters that make up his sister’s name. Sunny nodded her head. “Well, she was right. It’s not a person’s name. An anagram is when you move the letters around in a word or phrase to make another word or phrase.”
“Uh-huh,” Sunny said nodding her head slowly.
“Here, let me give you an example,” Klaus said. “You know how Mattathias was just calling for a Dr. Flacutono. Well, if we move the letters around in the name ‘Flacutono’, we get…” He lifted Sunny up and held her to his hip as he frantically moved the noodles around to change ‘Flacutono’ to a new word. Once he was done, he turned towards Sunny. “Can you read what that says, Sunshine?”
Sunny gasped as she read the two words that were now made up of the noodle letters. “Count Olaf,” she said angrily.
“Exactly,” Klaus said.
“Still kinda confusing,” Sunny said.
“Don’t worry, it’s confusing for me, too,” Klaus admitted as he sat Sunny down next to the noodles. “That’s why the alphabet soup will come in handy. Olaf uses anagrams when he wants to hide something, and right now, he’s hiding our sister. I bet she’s somewhere on this list, but her name’s been scrambled up. The soup is going to help us unscramble her name.”
Sunny slowly nodded her head.
“See, it’s difficult to figure out anagrams if you can’t move the letters around. Normally, alphabet blocks and lettered tiles would be perfect, but alphabet noodles will do in a pinch.” Klaus sighed. “We may need another can of soup,” he said handing her another can.
Sunny grinned, showing all of her sharp teeth and then swung her head down onto the can of soup. Both siblings remembering the day when she had learned to open cans all by herself. It was not that long ago, although for the two Baudelaires it felt like it was in the very distant past because it was before the Baudelaire mansion burned down when the entire family was happy, alive, and together. It was the Baudelaires’ mother’s birthday and she was sleeping late while Klaus and Sunny had offered to help their father bake a cake. Klaus was beating the eggs, butter, and sugar with a mixer as well as sifting the flour with the cinnamon, pausing every few minutes to wipe his glasses. While their father was making his famous cream cheese frosting, which would be spread thickly on top of the cake. All was going well until the electric can opener broke and their father didn’t have the proper tools to fix it. But he desperately needed to open a can of condensed milk to make his frosting, and for a moment it looked like the cake was going to be ruined. But Sunny, who had been quietly playing on the floor this whole time, looked up at her father and her brother and uttered her second word, “Bite”. Lifting her hand towards her father. Her father glanced down at his daughter and then back at his son, who shrugged his shoulders and said ‘it’s worth a try.’ Bertrand then handed Sunny the can of condensed milk and both male Baudelaires watched in awe as Sunny bit down on the can, poking for small holes so the sweet, thick milk could pour out. The two male Baudelaires looked at one another, smiled, laughed, and applauded. “That’s my girl,” Bertrand had said to Sunny as he lifted her up and held her close as he set the can on the counter. From then on, the family used Sunny whenever they needed to open a can of anything, except for beets which Sunny wasn’t particularly fond of. Now as the youngest Baudelaire bit along the edge of the can of alphabet soup, she wondered if one of her parents had really survived the fire. And she wondered if that someone would be her father. She missed both her parents and would love either one of them back in her life, although if she had a choice, she’d choose both. But Sunny had a slightly closer bond with her father and she missed their poetry hours and the way that he would toss her in the air and catch her. Klaus would never do that for her, he was always afraid he would drop her and her mother would never toss her high enough for Sunny to get the adrenaline rush that she loved so much. Her father would though. He trusted himself as much as Sunny trusted him to catch her each and every time. Sunny wondered if she dared get her hopes up just because of something Jacques Snicket had said on the Snicket file. What if the survivor is neither Baudelaire parent? What if it was Lemony? Sunny pondered if Lemony would adopt her and Klaus. Surely, he would. She told herself. He had helped them out before they had even met Violet. She wondered if Lemony did adopt them if he would toss her in the air like her father or recite poetry to her if she asked. She remembered when she had been tossed by Orwell back at Paltryville and how Lemony had caught her. She felt as though she could trust him. Besides, if Lemony was anything like his daughter, Sunny would trust him with her life in a heartbeat. Sunny glanced up at her brother who was hard at work looking for specific letters to spell their sister’s name that she wondered if the three siblings would ever have another chance to just be happy.
“Klaus…” Sunny said after a minute.
“Yeah, Sunshine…” Klaus replied, not looking up from his work.
She sighed. She wanted to ask him who he thought the survivor was but she decided against it, she decided that maybe she and Klaus can discuss that later when Violet is back in their arms again. She could still feel the cold metal of her sister's locket pressed against her chest and Sunny wanted nothing more to place the locket around Violet's neck, in its rightful place. “Nevermind,” she muttered.
Klaus finally was able to get all of the letters that he needed to spell Violet Snicket. He placed all the letters on top of another can so they could move them around. “Let’s take another look at the list of patients. Mattathias announced an operation so we should check the Surgical Ward section first just to narrow down our search.
Sunny nodded her head as Klaus scanned through the names on the list. “Goddammit!” he yelled slamming his fist on the counter near Sunny. Sunny jumped in shock.
“You okay?”
“Every fucking patient on this list has a name that looks like an anagram! How in the world are we gonna sort through all these names before it’s too late to help Violet?” he asked.
“V?” Sunny said.
“Sunny, you’re a genius. Any name that doesn’t have a ‘V’ in it can’t be an anagram for ‘Violet Snicket’.” Klaus said. “We could cross those off the list...if we had a pen, that is.”
Sunny reached thoughtfully in the pocket of Klaus’ medical coat and thankfully found a ballpoint pen. With a grin, Sunny handed the pen to Klaus, who quickly crossed out the names without Vs. “Okay, four names are left on the list,” Klaus said happily. “Albert K. Devilsenia, Ada O. Uservillet, Kit Litencoves, Ed Valiantsue. This makes it so much easier. Now let’s move around the letters in violet’s name and see if we can spell out ‘Albert K. Devilsenia. First.”
Working carefully to avoid breaking them, Klaus began to move the noodles he and Sunny had taken out of the soup, and soon learned that ‘Albert K. Devilsenia’ and ‘Violet Snicket’ were not anagrams. They weren’t even close. Klaus was able to spell out Violet’s first name but not her last name.
“Albert must be an actual sick person,” Klaus said in disappointment. “Let’s try to spell out Ada O. Uservillet.”
Once again, Klaus hurriedly shifted noodles, a faint and damp sound that made the children think of something slimy emerging from a swamp. It was, however, a far nicer sound than the one that interrupted their anagram decoding.
“Attention! Attention!” Mattathias’ voice sounded particularly snide as it called for attention.
“Oh, what does he want now?” Klaus muttered angrily.
“The Surgical Ward is now closed. Only Dr. Flacutono and his associates will be allowed into the ward until the patient is dead...I mean, until the operation is over. That is all.”
“Velocity!” Sunny screamed.
“I know we have to hurry!” Klaus cried. “I’m moving these noodles as quickly as I can, Sunny! Ada O. Uservillet isn’t right either!” He turned to the list of patients again to see who was next, and accidentally hit the noodles with his elbow, knocking it to the floor with a moist splat! Sunny glanced down as Klaus began to cry. “Can't I do anything right?” he cried as he tried to pick up the noodles that had once spelled out Violet’s name. But as he tried to pick up each noodle, they fell apart in his fingers, which only caused him to cry harder.
“It’s okay,” Sunny said, leaning down a bit to rub the top of Klaus’ head.
“No, it’s not. She’s going to die. She’s going to die because I can’t do anything right,” Klaus muttered. “She’s going to die just like her father and it’s all my fault,”
“We’ll save her,”
Klaus glanced up at his baby sister who was still perched on top of the counter above him. “How? How Sunny?”
“One more name,” she said pointing to the only name Klaus didn’t cross off the list. “It has to be her.”
“Not necessarily,” Klaus explained. “He could have put her in a different ward.”
“We can try it,” Sunny explained handing Klaus the pen and the list.
“Kit Litencoves?” Klaus said aloud. “Doesn’t Violet have an aunt named Kit?”
“I think so,”
“This might be her then,” Klaus said as he hurriedly wrote out his sister’s name on the patient list and then crossed out each letter that her name and the last name of the list shared. In a matter of seconds, the name of their elder sister transformed into Kit Litencoves. “It’s her,” he said happily before jumping to his feet and hugging his younger sister. “Sunny! We found her! Everything’s going to be okay!” he cried happily, a grin of triumph appearing on his face.
Sunny smiled as she returned the hug. “I knew you could do it,” she said slowly.
Klaus looked back at Sunny. “Thanks for believing in me, Sunshine. But I can’t take all the credit. If you didn’t use your teeth to open the soup I would’ve been here forever trying to unscramble these names with my mind.”
“It was nothing,”
“Plus...you didn’t let me give up.”
“Just us.” she reminded her brother.
“Just you, Violet, and me.” Klaus reiterated as he read the room number that Olaf and Esme were holding Violet in. “But let’s not congratulate ourselves entirely just yet. We have a big sister to save. It says that Kit Litencoves is in Room 922 of the Surgical Ward.”
“But Olaf closed that,” Sunny said sadly.
“Then we’ll have to open it,” Klaus said grimly as he began to tie the harness around him once more. “You ready to go back in?” he asked his sister gesturing to the harness.
“If it means saving Vi, yes,” Sunny said as she patiently waited for Klaus to tie the harness around himself and check to see if he had tightened it correctly before standing up on the counter and holding out her arms for her brother to grab her. He placed his sister into their conjoined disguise as he placed the fake beard back upon his face.
As he buttoned his medical coat, Klaus couldn’t help but feel happy. We’re saving her. The three of us are going to be okay. We just gotta get Violet, get the fuck out of here, and find the survivor. He smiled thinking about the survivor, whom he believed to be his mother. He could not wait to be in his mother’s arms again and to maybe even see her murder Olaf and Esme for putting her children through hell. He wondered how angry she’d be at him, though. For letting Olaf kidnap Sunny and ultimately breaking his promise. But maybe she’d be too distracted by meeting her eldest child that she won’t be too mad at him. Klaus sighed as he buttoned up the last button.
“You good, Sunny?” he whispered to her.
“Yep! Let’s go!” she cheered.
Klaus took a deep breath as he opened the supply closet door and walked out into the hallway. He glanced around the hallway determining how to get to Room 922. He was on a mission to save his older sister before it was too late.
Olaf grinned towards Violet as he watched her struggle against her restraints. She didn’t know what he was planning but it couldn’t be anything good if Esme and his entire troupe were here in the same room.
“What are you going to do to me, you fucks!” Violet screeched. “Klaus and Sunny will find me!”
Olaf rolled his eyes and laughed. “How many times do I have to tell you, they aren’t coming to rescue you. They left you with me to do whatever I please.”
“ You’re lying!” She screamed. “They...they wouldn’t… You have to be lying!” Violet’s tears were flowing down her face as the two white-faced women came into the room pushing in the anesthetic machine.
“We found the anesthesia machine,” one of the white-faced women said happily.
“This makes me see colored bubbles,” the other said as she inhaled more aesthesia.
Violet watched in horror as the woman handed Olaf the mask. “No! No!” Violet cried as she began to struggle harder. “ Klaus! Sunny!” she screamed as loud as she could.
Olaf rolled his eyes again. “She doesn’t listen very well,” Esme muttered. The vile woman turned to Violet gripping her face in her hand, pressing her long fingernails into Violet’s bruised cheeks. “Didn’t you hear my boyfriend? They. Left. You.” She said simply, enunciating every word.
“ No! They wouldn’t! They’re my siblings!” Violet cried desperately. “ They wouldn’t leave me! They know what you would do!”
Olaf smirked as Esme cackled viciously. “That’s what makes this even better…” Esme began.
Olaf pushed Esme’s hand away from Violet’s face so he can get up close and personal to her once more. “ You’re right. He does know. He knows just how evil I can be...and he left you.” The vile man hissed. “He left you just Like Beatrice...because face it, deary, to the Baudelaires...you are nothing. ” he stroked her cheek as he spoke, causing her to cry more. “So tell me, Violet, was sacrificing yourself from them truly worth it?”
“I’ve said it once...I’ll say it again, I’m finishing the job my father was unable to!” she screamed, spitting on the vile man once more. She quickly turned her head and spit towards Esme, who began to panic and scream. He growled as he wiped his face handing the towel to Esme, who was still screaming. Then both villians turned to the young girl and took turns slapping her with all their might. Olaf slapped her and her head jolted to the left and then Esme slapped her causing her head to jolt to the right.
He took a deep breath. “We are going to fix that delinquent behavior once and for all.”
“ Surgically,” Esme said smiling as she turned on the anesthetic machine. Violet continued to struggle, ignoring the pain she felt in her cheeks from where Olaf and Esme had slapped her. She knew the effort was fruitless, she was so helplessly outnumbered. She began to shake her head this way and that. She was desperate. She was frantic. She didn’t understand Olaf’s plan at all. But she knew that she had to fight. She looked upwards at Olaf’s henchpeople, looking more towards the Hook-Handed Man who had purposely stayed with her whenever Olaf was trying to be alone with the kidnapped girl. She still wondered why he looked vaguely familiar to her as if she had seen him before. She looked up at the troupe with pleading eyes as Olaf grabbed her cheeks once more.
“Don’t you know how to be a good girl?” he asked her, his tone sending chills down her spine and making her entirely uncomfortable. “Don’t you wanna behave? If you cooperate I’ll be extra nice to those pesky younger orphans when I find them. I won’t skin them alive if you stop struggling.”
Violet whined when Olaf squeezed her cheeks roughly. He leaned in uncomfortably close to her. “Do we have a deal?” He asked.
Violet whined again. Unable to answer with him grabbing her face like he was. He slowly released his grip on her. Tears fell from her eyes. “ You have me…” she whimpered, her eyes pleading with him and Esme as her arms and legs gave out and stopped struggling from the exhaustion. “... you don’t need them.”
“Such a noble girl,” Olaf said caressing her bruised cheek. “Always putting those brats before yourself just like your dear father.”
“Leave him out of this…” Violet cried meekly.
“I still wonder if the bookworm would have done the same,” Olaf mused.
“Oh, puh-lease. Have you met that sniveling little coward?” Esme mocked. “He would've sold her out in a snap!” she laughed, snapping her fingers in Violet’s face for emphasis.
“ Maybe it would take some convincing,” Olaf argued before beginning to laugh. He glanced down at his captive, who was now crying. “ Only because you would’ve had Sunny.”
Olaf grabbed the mask once more and Esme grabbed Violet’s face. “ No! No! I don’t...I don’t want to die...please!” Violet cried. She desperately tried to move her tired and restrained limbs but it was no use. She tried to move her head rapidly, to loosen Esme’s grasp. But that, too,was no use. Esme held her face roughly and in place as Olaf began to place the mask over her face.
“Oh, you won’t die,” Olaf replied.
“We’ll see,” Esme whispered, smiling viciously at Violet.
“See, we’re only going to pretend to kill you,” Olaf explained. “And when you wake up, we’ll see who was right. If you wake up, alone, well we’ll know that I was right when I told you that the Baudelaires don’t give a damn about you.” He cooed mockingly, wiping tears from her eyes. “And if you wake up to two beaten, bloodied, broken, but barely still alive orphans with you then we’ll know that you were right.”
Violet’s eyes widened when he had described what condition she might find her siblings in. “ No! Please! I’ll do whatever you want just leave them alone!” she cried, her voice wracked with desperation.
The villains merely laughed at her as they worked together to put the mask on her face. “Hold still, now, Violet,” Esme ordered.
“ What...what’s going to happen to me? ” she cried worriedly. Scanning the room for a decent human being. She tried to scratch at her wrist restraints but her hands didn’t reach far enough. Violet began screaming for help.
“Scream all you want, darling,” Esme mocked. “ No one is coming to save you.”
Finally, Olaf and Esme got the mask on Violet. The young girl tried to shake her head hard enough to get the mask to move. But Esme covered the mask with her hand, pushing down onto the girl’s mouth.
Violet continued to struggle although her body seemed to weigh more but her mind seemed to focus less. Violet tried her best to hold her breath and not inhale the anesthesia, but it was no use. She’s slowly becoming weaker and weaker due to the effects of the anesthetic. “He’ll save me! She’ll kill you!” she tried to yell but her screams were muffled. Violet was fighting the urge to close her eyes. Her eyelids were becoming extremely heavy. Her mind was slowly fading into fog. “They’ll…” she whimpered as her eyes began to squint. “He’ll...save me….she...she’ll...kill you…” she whimpered again as her head was becoming to foggy to stay awake and she was slowly slipping into unconsciousness.
“Shhhhh,” Olaf cooed, placing a hand on her cheek. “We’ve been through this...they left...no one’s coming to get you.”
“They’ll...Klaus...and Sun-Sunny….will…” she began as her eyes became too heavy to keep open at all. Esme relieved the pressure of the mask on the girl’s face. Violet slowly shook her head.
“Shhhh,” Olaf cooed, “It’ll all be over soon.”
“They’ll…” she cried again, tears were beginning to fall down her face once more. “... Dad...help...me...like...you….helped...them!” she tried to scream, but her voice was weak. Her voice was desperate and frantic. She shook her head sharply to the right. “... Dad...I’m sorry...please save….save me...Mr….Mr...Lemons….” she cried as she shook her head sharply to the left. She was trying to push the mask off of her head but to no avail.
“Shhhhh. Count backward from ten,” Olaf instructed.
“ L-lemon...man...I...I...can’t do...I can’t….do this...with...without...you,” she cried.as loud as she could with the mask affecting her and her fighting the anesthetic.
Both vile villains looked at one another confused and then back at Violet, who continued begging for her dad to save her. They weren’t aware of the fact that Jacques Snicket had suspected there was a survivor of a fire and Violet’s mind was too foggy to care about whether or not she was giving them this information or not. She turned her head towards the hospital door, she stretched her fingers out as far as she could as if she were reaching for her father.
“... Dad...your lit-little...girl...she...needs...you.” she pleaded. “ Don’t...please...don’t let….them kill me.”
“Your father is dead,” Olaf reminded her after his fit of laughter.
“And soon you will be, too,” Esme whispered bitterly, smirking at the young girl.
“ Dad...I don’t….I don’t...hate you,” she cried. “... save me…”
“He can’t save you, I burned him to a crisp remember?” Olaf asked continuing to laugh.
“ No!” she cried, her eyes rolling in her head. Her cries were no longer loud, but they were all the more desperate and emotional. “H-he...he’s going...to find...you...and kill...you,”
Olaf burst out laughing.
“ Lemon man!” she cried as loud as she could. “ Mr. Lemons!”
“Darling, absolutely no one is coming to save you,” Esme hissed as she waved her hand at Violet.
“ Dad...I need you…” she whimpered as she felt her fingertips go numb. Her wrist fell limp at the edge of the gurney and a few seconds later, her eyes shut completely. The last thing she could remember was the wicked laughter of Esme Squalor and the feel of Olaf’s hand stroking her cheek once more.
Olaf glanced towards his troupe. “Get the girl to the operating theatre. Get it prepared for our special guest,” he ordered as the henchperson of Indeterminate Gender began to roll Violet’s gurney out of Room 922. The White-Faced Women followed along pushing the anesthetic machine. Olaf looked to the Hook-Handed Man and the Bald Man. “You two, make sure that operating theatre is equipped with the scariest and sharpest medical tools you can find. And don’t let any unauthorized personnel on that stage!”
Esme folded her arms. “And what can I do?”
Olaf smirked. “You...can do what you do best,” he replied. “You’re going to capture the two remaining orphans and bring them to me,”
Esme rolled her eyes. “ Finally!” she screeched. “I can get my hands on my sugar bowl.”
“Just...get them to the operating theater and then we’ll get your damn sugar bowl,” Olaf explained.
Esme huffed angrily as Olaf walked away. She glared down the hall, a smirk slowly appearing down her face as she began to devise a plan of her own.
Authors notes:
There are brief descriptions of violence against a minor and brief discussion of Olaf's sick intentions with Violet. Read with caution. It isn't the main focus of the chapter but it is mentioned here and there. So read with caution.
Also, sorry if this chapter is super long I just kept adding a lot of shit and I honestly like how it turned out.
Notes:
First off I just want to apologize for how long this chapter took. Time has gotten away from me but I can promise that part three will be a day to day posting schedule like part one. Carnivorous Carnival might still have a couple days in between each chapter cause I am in the process of finding a new second job, still dealing with two jobs, and even moving. So updates won't take this long but they won't be day to day. I am hoping for the first chapter of CC to be posted in three days. Maybe even Thursday. I do appreciate the support this fic has gotten and I can't wait to wow y'all with part three.
That being said, we are at the last chapter of Hostile Hospital and I am feeling very emotional about that mere prospect. This just means we are close to the end of part two and near the start of part three. during the time in between parts two and three I will be posting a number of random one shots cause I don't plan to post until I have finished writing Grim Grotto to it's completion because Slippery Slope might be as long as Hostile Hospital has been.
So thank you all again for the support. Hope you enjoy the ending of HH.
The One With An Unhinged Madman and a Very Flawed, Daring Escape
Olaf smiled happily down at the film that was now in his hands. The Snicket File? He thought as his smile grew bigger. All he could think about was who he expected to be in this film. He had believed it would’ve been the love of his life, Kit Snicket. He glanced from the film towards Esme. Esme was looking at the young orphan boy with a cold, murderous expression. He stole a glance towards the unconscious girl that laid limp and lifeless on the cutting table. Then he slowly turned his gaze to the young boy and hidden toddler who stood before him. He smiled viciously at them as he secured the film into his pocket.
The villain’s smile widened when Esme had helped him reveal the orphans’ true identity to the crowd. He watched a terrified Klaus slowly begin to panic. The villain reveled in his young adversary’s fear. He glanced around. Bored with his plot. He was curious to know what was on the Snicket file and to tell the truth, he was eager to see Kit’s face again. Olaf glanced at Esme while Klaus and Sunny were too distracted by the audience to notice. Olaf was signaling for Esme to take care of the orphans while he dipped out momentarily to investigate the file. Esme gave a slow nod as she focused on causing the orphans more turmoil. Olaf looked around the stage for a way to escape undetected. But he didn’t have to think for too long because the blind old man who was in charge of the Library of Records had entered the room accusing the children of theft.
Olaf took this golden opportunity to leave the operating theater of Heimlich Hospital as he walked excitedly down the halls towards the Library of Records. All the while, he had taken the film out of his pocket and was staring at it with heavy eyes the entire duration of his walk. As he walked further and further away from the operating theater, he could faintly hear the desperate voice of Klaus Baudelaire asking where he had gone, he smirked with triumph as he rounded a corner finding the door to the library. He stepped inside the Library of Records smiling at the damage that his girlfriend had done when she was in pursuit of those awful orphans. He quickly found the area of the room where the projectors had been placed.
As he began to play the film, his face turned from happy to one of pure confusion. As he stared speechless at a ghost. Olaf was visibly upset. When he was told about the Snicket file, he hadn’t expected to see a Snicket brother on film. He grabbed the film’s case scanning it for a date. Of course, in good VFD fashion, there was no date of production, just the broad name. He slammed the case down in pure annoyance.
His eyes widened as he stared emotionless at Jacques Snicket. “But, before I do, I have an important update,” Jacques explained but Olaf couldn’t help but be merely distracted on who he could see. Olaf knew for a fact that he had murdered Jacques Snicket. He cocked his head to the side as he stared at Jacques, a volatile mix of emotions causing him to groan in annoyance as the volunteer spoke. Olaf had expected to see Kit Snicket, not her pesky, meddlesome twin brother who he had recently slain. He leaned his chin in his hand, feigning a yawn. Trying his best to mask his complete and utter discomfort for this situation. He scoffed aloud as he rolled his eyes, confused as to what he was feeling exactly.
It couldn’t be guilt. I’ve sunk too low to ever feel guilt and have empathy for another soul. He had thought with another quick eye roll. He had half a mind to turn off the film.
What information could Jacques Snicket possibly have that could be useful to me?
But as Olaf reached for the switch to turn it off. Jacques Snicket said it. Jacques said the haunting secret that the three orphans had learned moments before Esme Squalor burst into the library and successfully kidnapped Violet.
The vile man’s demeanor was calm, like the air that filled the Library of Records. But his cold demeanor was also very chilling. Anyone who knew Olaf well would take one look at him and accuse the man who sat in the Library of Records to be an imposter. He chuckled nervously, but in a low whisper as if he were afraid of others hearing him. For a brief moment, Olaf simply stared blankly towards the film. Jacques Snicket spoke on but Olaf paid him no attention. As if Jacques’ initial statement had frozen him in time. Jacques’ secret replayed in Olaf’s head in a continuous loop not allowing him a brief moment of peace. Olaf shook his head violently, but other than that his motions were bare, his demeanor was still calm.
After another few moments like that, Olaf stopped the film, rewound it to the very beginning, and turned it back on. Again, he listened to Jacques’ revelation about the recent fires. This time when he heard Jacques' theory, his heart stopped. A chill was sent over him.
It can’t be. He thought to himself desperately. Quickly succumbing to anxiety and paranoia that was now creeping in on him, he glanced around the empty library. He stood up from his seat to get a better look around. He wasn’t sure why but he could feel his heart beating in his chest as he surveyed the area for his older enemies.
Olaf wouldn’t admit to anyone that he was afraid, even though he was. He knew that if the kids knew that there was a survivor; and he had a strong feeling that the children did, in fact, know what was on the film seeing that Klaus was hesitant to hand it over to Esme, only handing it over because he thought it would be a good bargaining chip for Violet’s life. But if the kids knew there was a survivor and they somehow got to the survivor first, before Olaf could, he knew that that would only mean terrible things for him. Who knows what Beatrice, Bertrand, and Lemony would do to him if they ever found out just what he had done to their children and even some of the vile things he had planned especially when it came to the eldest orphan. His breathing was slowly going back to normal as he shook his head again.
He scoffed as he turned off the film again. He waited for it to rewind as he kept shaking his head defiantly. “What does Jacques Snicket know? Nothing. That’s what.” he tried to convince himself. “He was always a know-it-all with no way to back anything up.” But no matter what he said aloud to himself, nothing was convincing him that he was safe from the parents’ wrath.
He ran one of his hands nervously through his disgusting, grey hair. “No. No. Lemony is dead.” he said shakily. But then he remembered how a struggling violet was desperately crying out for her father when he was using the anesthetic to subdue her. “Remember...you...you killed him. You set his apartment building ablaze!” the vile man began to nervously laugh at this statement. He was hoping for his laugh to come out shrill and villainous, as it usually does, but it came out nervous and unenthusiastic. “Killing him...and whoever else was unfortunate enough to die,”
His eyes widened when he remembered the young teen girl that was strapped to a gurney in the middle of the operating theater. How did she survive? How did she escape the fire? That question now haunted him more than it had when he had first laid eyes on her at Prufrock. When he immediately recognized her as a miniature Beatrice with Lemony’s blue eyes. Olaf remembers when he had set the fire it was in the early hours of the morning or late hours of the evening (depending on how you look at), surely Violet would have been sleeping or inside her home when he started the fire.
So if an untrained fourteen-year-old girl could escape the fire I set….who’s to say, Lemony Snicket, a man who has had a lifetime of training in a cult, couldn’t escape as well? He thought to himself. He rubbed the side of his face anxiously.
“Get a grip, Olaf.” He told himself as he stopped the film. “She only escaped because that brat is lucky,” he smirked as he remembers her lifeless, limp body laying on a gurney in the operating theater. “And her luck is soon going to run out.”
He took a small breath. “Besides, there’s no way he survived...he would’ve shown his face by now.” The vile man reasoned, but to be honest, he wasn’t too sure. Olaf did not think it made sense for Lemony to risk his life for two children that weren't biologically his but not even try to rescue his own child. He also highly doubted Bertrand and Beatrice wouldn’t have shown their faces in an effort to save their kids. He began to nervously laugh as he shook his head. “Maybe...I misheard Jacques. He always played that stupid hearing game with Lemony…” Olaf stated, still trying to find some logical way to debunk what he heard Jacques Snicket say.
As he rewound the film once more, Olaf took a deep breath and played it again. Olaf’s eyes fixated on Jacques as he listened attentively as Jacques explained that Lemony was either dead or on the lam. Olaf’s eyes widened as he shook his head defiantly. “No. Lemony Snicket is dead,” he told himself. He hoped that if he said it out loud enough times then it would stay true. He desperately wanted that statement to stay true. He wanted Lemony Snicket to be dead.
Olaf glared slightly at the vision of Jacques Snicket. Grimacing, groaning, and growling as the ‘noble’ man spoke. It was like Jacques Snicket had come back from the dead to deliver Olaf some bad news. Jacques was always the bearer of bad news when Olaf was still working alongside the Snickets. He grabbed the file’s case once more and threw it to the ground when he couldn’t find a date. Even with the film’s metallic case cling ing on the ground as it bounced from being thrown, Olaf could still hear every word Jacques was saying loud and clear.
“It seems there may have been a survivor of a recent fire,” Jacques said again. Olaf grumbled as he kicked the air in front of his feet. Even while sitting he managed to stomp both feet as if he were a child throwing a temper tantrum and not simply a very highly unstable grown man going through his seventh midlife crisis in the last several months. As his hand ran through his hair again, he took a firm grip, slightly pulling in anger and desperation.
“Of course…” he cried, mockingly. “Of fucking course!”
His breathing became sharp and quick but not from fear as it had only a few minutes ago. Now his breathing was irregular because of his anger. He felt a tear or two form in his eyes as he thought about how the people who have wronged him could still be alive.
“No,” he cried out. His voice was somewhat desperate but mainly defeated. “No! This isn’t fair!” He screeched as he rewound the film again, not caring to turn it off. The film rewound although this rewind had slightly distorted the video. But Olaf didn’t pay it any attention. “ Nothing ever goes my way!” He barked, his voice still dripped desperation even if he was trying his best to mask it. He thought of each and every scheme that had failed since his pursuit of Klaus and Sunny Baudelaire, this revelation caused him to growl. It was bad enough that the kids were surviving him but now their hypocritical parents?
“I can’t believe it,” Olaf whined. “ This changes everything!” The vicious man grabbed at his hair again, pulling at it aggressively as he growled inhumanely. His mind flashed to the unconscious girl on the cutting table, the bespectacled boy who was desperately trying to rescue her, and the simpering infant with the sharp teeth.
“ They’re supposed to be orphans!” He growled, shaking with each word.
As he yelled that last sentence, he shut his mouth abruptly. His expressionless face slowly growing into a Grinch-like grin as his eyes shone with an idea. He began to laugh lightly as if he had just remembered a joke that Esme or one of his troupe members had told him.
Olaf’s world was currently spiraling as his happiness about getting his revenge against Lemony Snicket may not have actually happened or that his second-hand revenge against Bertrand Markson and Beatrice Baudelaire didn’t occur either and this revelation sent him in a frenzy. The mere idea of a survivor had his entire soul heated up.
His face grew dark as he thought, once more, about their three plucky children. A cruel, vicious smile appeared on the man’s face. “ It would be fun to deal with the survivor and their precious children.” He said aloud, his light laughter turned into full-grown villainous howling as his dark mind began to imagine cruel scenarios for the survivor and their children. A cruel smile appeared on his face as he began to fantasize about how he would ‘take care’ of these orphans in front of their parents.
He thought first about little Sunny, and how he would rip the infant limb from limb, listening to her screams and cries of agony and her parents and siblings horrified pleads. He then thought about Klaus and how he would cut the bookworm in such a way where the young boy slowly bled out agonizingly slow, somehow surviving through to the very end of Olaf’s madness, only to be killed the last second when Olaf finally decides to put him out of his misery with a quick slit of his throat. The sick man reveled in the screams that the survivor and Klaus would be making. He already knew how fun it was to carve up the middle orphan as if he were a pumpkin in October and he was very eager to do it some more. But then finally, he thought about Violet, the girl who laid unconscious and restrained on the cutting table. A sick smile laced with the cruelest of intentions appeared on his face as he began to imagine all of the dark and twisted things he had planned for little Miss Snicket. The mere prospect of even having an audience to be forced to watch as he breaks their little girl in the cruelest way imaginable made Olaf smile wickedly.
He could finally cause the survivor more pain than they had caused him and he would use their own children to do so. Maybe he can twist the cruel reality of a survivor of a recent fire in his favor. It would only take postponing murdering the brats until he found out who was the survivor and then brutally torturing their children to death in front of them. Olaf shrugged his shoulders. It wasn’t what he had initially planned but this gave him more time to torment the children and that always made him feel a little happier.
Finally, Olaf stood turning to leave. He felt as though he had been away from the operating theater for too long and he was beginning to worry that the others couldn’t handle the Baudelaires and an unconscious Snicket girl. He would be so fucking pissed if Esme and the others lost his little pet. But as he turned his back to Jacques Snicket for the last time, film Jacques said it once more. “There may be a survivor of a recent fire.”
Olaf took one deep breath as he stood motionless for a second. Jacques’ words hitting Olaf slowly as if Jacques were standing right in front of him, stabbing him cruelly. “I know!” Olaf hissed, his hands slowly tightening to white-knuckled fists. He let out a vicious growl that caused his whole body to shake aggressively.
Olaf turned towards the projector rapidly as he shoved the projector that played the film down onto the table. In a fit of blind rage, Olaf gripped the projector and began to beat it repeatedly against the table. “ Baudelaire!” he hissed as he continued to beat the projector against the table. “ Markson!” He growled again as he turned towards the chair that he had sat in and kicked it with all his might. As the psychotic man hissed, “ Snicket!” the chair flew across the room only stopping when it collided with one of the filing cabinets that had survived Esme’s rampage. He turned back towards the projector continuing to slam it against the table, eventually shoving it down and then pounding on the table with his fists. “ NOOOOOOO!” He bellowed in the empty library. His voice echoing and bouncing off the walls
He gripped onto the projector one last time and rapidly smacked it against the table once more and carefully watched with curiosity when a small flame had illuminated. Olaf instinctively tried to swat it out but then as his eyes shone bright with an idea, his face went dark with no emotion besides cold ruthlessness.
He slowly bent down towards the flame, his face darkening as his sick thoughts danced around his head laced with cruel intentions. He softly blew at the flame, nurturing it, allowing it to grow into a full-fledged fire. As he gazed at the intoxicating orange flames, reveling in the intense high he was feeling, he merely shrugged his shoulders.
Klaus gazed up at the crowd nervously as he and Sunny jumped when they heard a familiar laugh, far above them. The two younger orphans glanced at one another nervously and then focused their gazes towards the intercom speaker that was above them. The siblings had heard this laughter when Olaf had first captured the Quagmire triplets and Sunny, and when Esme had successfully pushed Klaus and Violet down the elevator shaft at 667 Dark Avenue, and when he had trapped the two older siblings in a locked Deluxe Cell or trapped Sunny and the Quagmires in a small cage at the bottom of an elevator shaft, a statue of a red herring, and a fountain. It was the triumphant laughter of someone who has cooked up a fiendish plot and succeeded, although it always sounded like the laughter of someone who has just told an excellent joke. Because he was laughing over the scratchy intercom, Olaf sounded as if he had a piece of aluminum foil over his mouth, but the laughter was still loud enough to help wear off the anesthesia only slightly, and Violet murmured something and tried to move her restrained arms.
“Oops,” Olaf said, interrupting his laughter when he noticed the intercom was on. “Attention!” Olaf cried as Klaus cried out a desperate ‘no’ in response. “This is Doctor Mattathias Medical-School with some very important news. A terrible fire has broken out in Heimlich Hospital.”
The crowd around the children gasped as they all stood up from their seats. Even the troupe and Esme glanced at one another nervously. “The fire was set in the Library of Records by that Baudelaire murderer and his baby accomplice!”
“ Toddler!” Sunny corrected as the crowd began to glare at her and her brother.
“Sunny, not the time,” Klaus whispered as he continued to gaze up at the intercom, silently pleading for Olaf to stop his treachery. He shook his head as Olaf spoke and continued to mouth the word ‘no’.
“The fire has spread through a number of wards. The orphans are still at large, so do everything you can to find them, arrest them, and bring them to me. ” he hissed into the intercom.
“No,” Sunny whimpered as the crowd around the children glared intensely.
“Oh, and you might want to evacuate the building...or move the patients...or something,” Olaf said nonchalantly. “Thank you. That is all.”
Their enemy’s voice disappeared in a matter of seconds. Klaus looked around desperately. “We...we...we couldn’t have started the fire! We’ve been in this operating theater the whole time!” he reasoned.
“Get them!” One nurse cried. “Somebody tell Mattathias we’ve captured the children!” she turned to Klaus and Sunny. “You three brats are in big trouble. You’re murderers, arsonists, kidnappers, and now spurious doctors.”
“Don’t forget thieves!” Hal cried, holding up the fake key ring.
“They get that from their mother!” Esme cried angrily, glaring daggers at Klaus.
“That’s…” Klaus began but then he looked towards his sisters. “Not...not all of that is true...I only disguised myself...to save…” But as he looked around, he feared that no one was believing him. He looked at the spurious keyring in Hals’ hands that he and his sisters had used to sneak into the Library of Records. He looked at his ripped medical coat, which he had used to disguise himself as a doctor and he looked at the rusty blade in his own hands, which he had just been holding over his unconscious older sister. Klaus remembered when he and Sunny lived with Uncle Monty, and the two siblings, with some help from a disguised Lemony Snicket, brought several objects to Mr. Poe as evidence to Olaf’s treacherous plot. Because of the small objects, Olaf was placed under arrest, and now Klaus was afraid that the same would happen to him and his sisters.
“Surround them!” The Hook-Handed Man cried, pointing at the children with a curved glove. “But be careful. The bookworm still has the knife!”
Olaf’s associates spread out in a circle and slowly began walking towards the youngsters at all angles. Sunny whimpered in fright and ran behind Klaus’ legs as Klaus was trying to guard both his sisters. Klaus quickly picked Sunny up and put her on the gurney.
“Capture those orphans!” a doctor cried.
The two white-faced women smiled wickedly at Klaus and Sunny. “We’ll perform surgery on all three of you!” one of the women shouted causing Esme to facepalm.
Hal looked to them in disbelief. “What?” he asked. “No, the children will go to prison, of course.”
“Well, technically they’ll be in juvenile detention until they come of age,” the henchperson of indeterminate gender explained.
“Ridiculous!” the bald man cried. “They should be tried as adults.”
“Murderers should get the chair,” one white-faced woman argued.
“We’re talking about children,” Hal complained.
“Very small chairs, then,” the other white-faced woman commented as the troupe took another step towards the children.
“We can discuss the details after we arrest them,” a volunteer fighting disease cried.
“Yeah! Stop arguing and arrest them!” another cried.
“That’s what we’re doing, you fool!” Esme cried impatiently, but when she turned her head towards the two Baudelaire orphans and the drowsy Snicket girl they saw her wink. “We’re going to capture only one of you,” she said, in a quiet voice so the audience couldn’t hear her. She had her eyes focused on Klaus, who backed into Violet’s gurney causing the Snicket girl to shriek slightly.
Sunny turned towards Violet. “Shhhh, it’s okay,” she whimpered to the drowsy Violet as she pets her hair softly.
Esme smiled as she glanced down at her stiletto shoes. “This in footwear isn’t just useful for making me look glamorous and feminine,” she explained as she took one of her heels off and pointed it right at the children. “These stilettos are perfect for slitting children’s throats.” she hissed under her breath, taking a small step closer to Klaus, who adjusted the large, rusty knife in his hands. “The two bratty girl orphans will be killed while trying to escape from justice, leaving the one bratty, little Baudelaire boy to give us the fortune.”
“You’ll never get your hands on our inheritance,” Klaus cried. “Or your shoes at my sisters’ throats.”
Esme merely shrugged. “We’ll see,” she cried, as she swung her shoe at Klaus as if it were a sword. Klaus ducked quickly and felt the whoosh! Of the air as the blade swept over him. He glanced at Esme confused. She had just explained her intention to kill his sisters not him, so why was she swinging her shoes at him. It didn’t take Klaus long to realize what Esme was doing as he jumped back up onto his feet in hopes of protecting Violet and Sunny.
“ She’s trying to kill us!” Klaus cried desperately. “Can’t you see? These are the real murderers!”
“No one will ever believe you,” Esme said in a sinister whisper and swung her shoe at Sunny, who moved away just in time.
“I don’t believe you!” Hal cried. “My eyesight may not be what it used to be, but I could see that phony medical coat on the ground.”
“I don’t believe you either!” a nurse cried. “I can see that rusty knife!”
Esme swung her shoe towards the drowsy Violet this time, Klaus maneuvering Violet’s gurney out of the way in the nick of time. “Why don’t you surrender?” Esme hissed. “We’ve finally trapped you, just as you trapped Olaf all those other times.”
“When did we ever…” Klaus cried as he jumped back away from Esme’s attack.
“Now you know what it feels like to be a villain!” the bald man yelled. “Move closer, everyone! Mattathias told me whoever grabs them first gets to choose where to go for dinner tonight!”
Klaus looked at the group of villains in disbelief. He scanned towards the crowd looking for any friendly or helpful face. He frowned when he realized that no one was going to help them or stick up for the children. Esme could literally slit one of their throats and no one in this half-emptied crowd would bat an eyelash.
“Is that so?” the Hook-Handed Man asked. “Well I’m in the mood for pizza.” he swung a rubber-gloved hook at Klaus, who fell back against the gurney, rolling himself and his sister out of the evil man’s reach even if it was only a few inches.
“I feel more like Chinese food,” one of the white-faced women said. “Let’s go to that place where we celebrated the Quagmire and Baudelaire kidnapping.”
“I want to go to Cafe Salmonella,” Esme snarled.
Klaus pushed against the gurney again, wheeling it in the other direction as the circle of associates closed in on him and his sisters. He held the rusty knife up for protection as he listened to the whimpering of his younger sister and watched the restrained struggles of his elder sister. Klaus did not think he could use a weapon, even on people as wicked as these. Even if that dark thought had crossed his mind more than ten times in the last five minutes. He frowned when he realized that he was thinking just like Count Olaf. He shook his head slightly, he refused to be anything like Olaf. He knew if Count Olaf would have been trapped, he would not have hesitated to swing the rusty blade at the people who were surrounding him, but despite what the bald man had said, Klaus did not feel like a villain or rather, he didn’t want to feel like a villain. He didn’t want to feel a thing like Olaf. He refused to be the thing he hated the most. What Klaus did feel like though, was someone who needed to escape.
“Klaus...what do we do?” Sunny asked in a terrified whisper as the troupe and Esme took another step towards the kids.
“I...I don’t know, Sunny…” he admitted as he backed into his sister’s gurney again, he glanced down at Violet and then at Sunny, giving his younger sister a small smile, because he knew just how the three siblings were going to escape. “But a great mind once told me... there’s always something, ” he said as he smiled down at the drowsy Violet, who merely looked up at him with a face full of fear, disorientation, and confusion.
“Get back!” Klaus cried as he focused on the villains. “This knife is very sharp!”
“You can’t kill all of us,” the Hook-Handed Man replied. “In fact, I doubt you have the courage to kill anyone.”
“It doesn’t take courage to kill someone,” Klaus replied. “It takes a severe lack of moral stamina.”
“That is a wonderful way to describe your parents,” Esme commented, smirking.
“Wait...what…?”
“But I’m afraid, your fancy words won’t save you now, you twerp.” Esme snarled mockingly.
“That’s true,” Klaus admitted. “What will save me now is a bed on wheels used to transport hospital patients,”
Without another word, Klaus tossed the rusty knife to the floor, startling Olaf’s associates into stepping back. Esme even dropped her stiletto shoe in shock. The circle of people with a severe lack of moral stamina was spread out a little more, just for a moment, but a moment was all the Baudelaires needed. Klaus gripped Violet’s gurney tightly and began to roll his sisters off the stage. Before he had a chance to jump on the gurney himself, he felt something sharp prying at his skin.
“Oh no, you don’t,” Esme hissed as she gripped Klaus’ arm tightly. Digging her stiletto nails into his skin as roughly as he could. The young boy cried out as the vile woman smirked. Klaus desperately tried to push the gurney that held his sisters away but Esme kept him in place.
“Please…” Klaus pleaded, forgetting that Esme was like Olaf and she had absolutely no humanity left within her.
“ Please…” Esme mocked, beginning to chuckle. “ You three aren’t going anywhere!” she hissed into Klaus’ ear as he continued to struggle to get the vile woman to let him go. Olaf’s troupe just stood stupidly around unsure of what to do. While more of the crowd had decided that exiting a burning hospital was a better idea then capturing three falsely-accused orphans. Although some of the crowd did stay to help capture the kids. “Olaf and I have plans for each of you…” Esme snarled as she glanced towards a terrified Sunny who sat at the foot of Violet’s gurney. “Ain’t that right, babylaire?”
Sunny looked to the confused and struggling Violet to the terrified and struggling Klaus and then at the smirking bitch who held them in place. Sunny grimaced and shook her head, a faint attempt to get Olaf’s and Esme’s voices out of her head as she began to remember the cruel, vicious details of the villain’s plot to murder her and her siblings. Sunny began to shake where she sat as Esme gripped Klaus’ arm tighter. Klaus grimaced and groaned in pain as he glanced towards Sunny with pleading eyes. Sunny felt a knot in her stomach, knowing the last time that she had used her teeth to help someone it had ended badly for her. She remembered the muzzle, the beating, the drugging. Even the time she bit Olaf to get him to release Klaus which resulted in her own kidnapping. Fear was paralyzing her to her core. But then Sunny remembered what Olaf told her about what he had done to Klaus and she took another look at Violet, who was bruised and tied, and those factors alone shattered Sunny’s fear and replaced it with pure hatred.
“ Let’s go, brats. Maybe if you’re lucky, we’ll wait until the girl wakes up to dispose of the brats we don’t need,” Esme hissed in Klaus’ ear, loud enough for Sunny to hear. Sunny glared at the woman before shakily standing up on the gurney and running towards the vile woman with each wobbly step, she caused the gurney that held her and her older sister to shake.
Violet shook her head from side to side, faster than before but still, her movements were halted by the anesthetic. “The...earth’s...ending!” Violet shouted.
Sunny reached her destination as she bit Esme’s wrist as hard as she could causing the woman to let go of her brother and scream in pain.
“ You vile beast!” Esme hissed. “ The baby bit me!”
Sunny quickly sat down as Esme gripped her own arm. Klaus took this opportunity to turn towards the villainess, giving her a rough shove which caused her to plummet to the ground, effectively breaking the stiletto shoes that she was still wearing. Esme crashed into the ground with a growl as she reached for Klaus’ pant leg. But it was too late, she gripped onto the air because the children were already running out of the operating theater.
A cry rose from the remaining audience as the Baudelaires sped past Olaf’s associates. Esme screamed a high pitched shriek causing several people to cringe and cover their ears. “ AFTER THEM YOU IMBECILES!” she screeched to the troupe who then realized what had just happened and began running after the children in hot pursuit.
“They won't get away from me!” Hal cried as he gripped the side of Violet’s gurney.
“Hal... please.” Klaus whimpered as the gurney slowed to a halt.
“You destroyed my library!” Hal cried defensively.
Both Klaus and Sunny glanced behind them and then Sunny glanced back at the old man. Butterflies fluttered in the youngest Baudelaire’s stomach as Hal glared at her from behind his tiny glasses. Unlike Olaf’s associates, Hal was not an evil person, well as far as they know. My research says otherwise. He merely was someone who loved the Library of Records and was trying to capture the people he believed had set it on fire, and it pained Sunny to see that he thought she was an evil criminal, instead of an unlucky toddler. But she knew she did not have time to explain to Hal what had really happened. She scarcely had time to say a single word, and yet that is precisely what the youngest Baudelaire orphan did.
“Sorry,” Sunny said to Hal and gave him a big smile. Then she opened her mouth a little wider and bit Hal’s hand as gently as she could so that he would let go of the gurney without getting hurt. Which is the exact opposite thing she did to Esme.
“Ow!” Hal whined. “The baby bit me!”
“ Join the club!” Esme screamed as she began to stand up. Klaus rolled his sisters out of the door, he stopped pushing as Violet shook her head left and right trying to move the hair out of her eyes. Sunny looked at her brother with confusion but then understood what he was doing when he grabbed a mop and successfully barricaded the door to the operating theater. Klaus gripped onto his sister’s gurney once more as Olaf’s troupe reached the door and were trying to use their combined weight and strength to break Klaus’ barricade. Klaus didn’t stick around long enough to find out just how handy this idea was because he began racing down the hallway.
“Oh no no no,” Klaus cried as he took a quick glance behind him. He tried to run faster than before, he glanced down at Violet who was shaking her head still. She squinted up at him, her face was unreadable. Klaus could see that his sister’s eyes weren’t focusing. Sunny leaned closer to Violet to brush her sister’s hair from her face gently.
Klaus was running fast enough to when he reached the first corner, he skids around it rapidly, nearly losing his footing. He glanced towards the direction that he had just come from and he could see Olaf’s troupe running and chasing him.
“Don’t let them get away!” The hook-handed man yelled. “Tackle them!”
“This is like PE class all over again!” The Henchperson of Indeterminate Gender whined.
“Tell me about it!” Klaus called back to them, remembering Olaf’s cruel scheme back at Prufrock.
“Stop! Murderers!” a doctor behind the troupe called out.
“Weeeeeeeeeee,” Violet cried as she jerked her wrists up trying to clap in excitement. Violet’s wrists made a harsh, loud impact as her restraints caught her limp arms. Her eyes rounder her sockets as she looked at Klaus confused. “Where….what….am I….?” she asked, her voice ringing of utter confusion.
Klaus and Sunny glanced at one another worriedly. “Sunny, start biting through her restraints,”
Sunny merely nodded as she began to chew through the leather belt that was around her sister’s wrists and ankles.
“Attention!” announced Olaf’s voice.
“ Oh, would you just shut the fuck up! ” Klaus yelled towards the intercom as loudly as he could, utterly frustrated with Olaf’s bullshit.
“This is Mattathias, the Head of Human Resources! The murderous arsonist orphans are escaping on a gurney! Capture them at once! Also, the fire is spreading throughout the hospital! You might want to evacuate!”
“Hurry!” Sunny cried. As Sunny broke through one of Violet’s restraints, the two Baudelaires watched happily as Violet slowly lifted up her wrist, but their happiness soon turned into horror when they realized she was unable to hold it up for too long and the two younger siblings watched as their older sister’s wrist fell limp on the side of the gurney, dangling lifelessly.
“I’m going as fast as I can!” Klaus cried, trying to increase his speed. Klaus steered the gurney and ran as fast as his legs could carry him while Sunny held on for dear life as she worked on freeing her older sister. “ Violet, wake up, please! ” he cried, his voice thick with tears of desperation. “ I can’t do this…”
“I’m...try...ing….” Violet muttered, squinting around her. The anesthesia made everything seem faint and foggy, and it was almost impossible for her to speak, let alone move.
“ Try harder, please.” Klaus pleased. “You can help push.”
Sunny just glanced at him with bewilderment. “She can’t push,” Sunny told her brother, Klaus merely rolled his eyes and ignored Sunny.
“Violet…” Klaus called out as he continued to push the gurney. Violet’s eyes flickered open and closed. “The hospital’s on fire…and I don’t know what to do!” he cried in a panicky voice.
Violet only smiled a goofy smile up at him. “Y-you...came...back...for...for me?” her own voice was drowsy from the anesthetic but she was choking on her own tears.
Klaus and Sunny looked at one another and then at her. “Why wouldn’t we?” Klaus asked.
“Sister!” Sunny yelled.
Violet, still a bit woozy from the anesthetic, slowly glanced around as Sunny freed her other wrist, she put her gentle, limp hand on Sunny’s head, smiling at her. Tears falling from her eyes. “...you...you both...came back,” she said happily, her demeanor immediately changing to sadness. “B-b-but...but...O-Olaf...s-s-said you...left…” she cried, trying to use her limp hand to wipe away her tears, but every attempt was slow and never truly wiped away the entire tear. Sunny smiled at her big sister and leaned closer to wipe Violet’s tears from her eyes.
“Fuck what Olaf said!” Klaus shouted. “We would never leave you!” Klaus felt a little insulted that Violet would believe Olaf when he had told this blatant lie but he also could fault Violet, who knew what she had been through and for how long she had been drugged. Maybe she is only believing what Olaf had said because she was high on the knockout drugs. Klaus was cautiously running through the burning hospital, still panicked beyond belief. He understood why Violet was a bit distracted but he would much rather have this discussion when he and both of his sisters were out of danger.
Sunny smiled down at her sister. “Ohana.” the toddler stated and Klaus knew that this needed no translation even to a very disoriented Violet. Violet smiled at her baby sister as Sunny pulled Violet’s locket from around her neck. “We love you, too,” Sunny said, as she put the locket around Violet’s neck gently.
The troupe was hot on their tails as the children passed another group of confused nurses and doctors. “Those must be those murderers Mattathias was talking about!” one cried. “Let’s help those other doctors capture them!”
Klaus steered the gurney around a corner, as several more hospital staff joined the chase. “Violet...we’re in trouble…”
“I...get...that…”
“Wake up,” Klaus begged Violet, who was looking around her in a confused way. “ Please, Violet!”
“Door!” Sunny shrieked as Violet limply grabbed Sunny in hopes of shielding her of any danger as Klaus pushed the gurney through the doors. Once the children were through the doors, Klaus was about to go down a specific hallway until the children caught a glimpse of bright orange flames.
“...what’s...that…?” Violet asked confused, gazing towards the bright orange flames until she couldn’t see them anymore. Sunny took this time to carefully crawl down to Violet’s ankles where she could see her sister had also been restrained. Sunny quickly began chewing through a third of Violet’s restraints until she heard a snap! Of the leather fabric. Sunny smiled as she crawled to the other side and began working on the final restraint.
“I told you there’s a fire and I need your help to escape,” Klaus pleaded.
“F...fire?” Violet repeated. “...where?”
“Here. In the hospital,”
“W-why...are...are we...in...a hos...pital?”
“That’s a rather long and depressing story,” Klaus said. “It’s also not important…” Klaus smiled at Sunny when he saw her sit up and give him two thumbs up, her way of indicating that Violet was no longer restrained.
“Get back here you brats!” the bald man yelled.
Klaus continued to push the gurney that carried his sisters as he watched frantic hospital staff run right past him, more concerned about finding safety than capturing the children. Klaus pushed every empty gurney he passed behind him in hopes of slowing down the angry mob.
“Stairs!” Sunny yelled, pointing to a staircase. Klaus turned the gurney in the direction his sister indicated. Sunny’s eyes widened with fear once she realized what her brother might be doing. She quickly crawled back closer to Violet and him, preferring to be on that side of the gurney if she was right about what Klaus was planning.
“Sunny, hold on,” Klaus cried as he jumped on to the back of the gurney holding on for dear life as Sunny took the opportunity of grabbing onto both Klaus and Violet, her way of attempting to keep them from falling off. The children began to roll down the stairs, bouncing up and down with each step. It was a fast, slippery ride that reminded Klaus of playgrounds that he would visit with his parents when he was younger. At a curve in the staircase, Klaus scraped his shoes against the floor to stop the gurney, and then leaned over to look at one of the hospitals’ confusing maps.
“I’m trying to figure out if we should go through that door,” he said, pointing at a door marked ‘Ward for People with Nasty Rashes’. “Or continue down the staircase.”
“We can’t go down,” Sunny cried as she pointed a finger downward. Klaus looked and even Violet managed to focus enough to look down where Sunny was pointing. Down the staircase, just past the next landing, was a flickering, orange glow, as if the sun was rising out of the hospital basement, and a few wisps of dark black smoke were curling up the staircase like the tentacles of some ghostly animal. It was an eerie sight that had haunted the two younger Baudelaires in their dreams, ever since that fateful day at the beach when all their trouble began and had only haunted Violet since she had been sent to Prufrock. For a moment, the three children were unable to do anything but stare down at the orange glow and the tentacles of smoke, and think about all they had lost because of what they were looking at.
“Fire,” Violet cried faintly.
“Yes,” Klaus sighed. “It’s spreading up this staircase. We’ve got to turn and go back upstairs.”
From upstairs, the orphans listened to Olaf’s troupe members arguing.
“No up,” Sunny said.
“I can see that,” Klaus replied. He gave a low growl as he turned his sisters’ gurney towards the door marked ‘Ward for People with Nasty Rashes’, having made this rash decision, Klaus turned the gurney and wheeled it through the door, just as his favorite person began speaking over the intercom.
“Fuck you!” Sunny screamed at the intercom.
“This is Mattathias!” he said hurriedly. “All associates of mine, continue to search for those children! Everyone else, gather in front of the hospital! Either we will catch those murderous orphans as they escape, or like their pesky parents ... they’ll be burned to a crisp! ” The children shuddered as they all listened to the unhinged madman laugh into the intercom microphone once more. Laughing as though he was a Disney villain who had just momentarily won against the protagonist.
Klaus and Sunny looked at each other worriedly when they watched Violet shudder. She slowly wrapped her arms around herself. “I-I...I don’t….l-like...fires,” she admitted softly, not looking either sibling in the eye. “...I...lost...m-my....dad...in a….f-f-fire,”
Klaus frowned as Sunny merely nodded. “We know. We did, too, sis.” Klaus cried.
“Have each other,” Sunny explained.
The children’s eyes got wide when they heard Olaf’s troupe members once again approaching. Klaus rolled his sisters’ gurney into the Ward for People with Nasty Rashes and saw that Mattathias was right. The gurney was racing down a hallway, and the children could see another orange glow at the far end of it.
“...no…” Violet whimpered. The children heard another brief argument behind them as Olaf’s associates lumbered down the stairs. The three siblings were trapped in the middle of a hallway that led only to a fiery death or Olaf’s clutches.
Klaus started breathing heavily as he was trying to weigh his options in his head. While Violet wrapped her limp arms around Sunny. Klaus leaned down and stopped the gurney. “We’d better hide,” he said, jumping to the floor. “It’s too dangerous to be rolling around like this.”
“Where?” Sunny asked desperately, as Klaus helped Violet sit up on the gurney. Klaus quickly took Sunny from Violet’s arm and set her on the ground.
“Someplace close by,” Klaus said, grabbing Violet’s arm. “The anesthesia is still wearing off, so Violet can’t walk too far.”
“I’ll...try…” Violet murmured, stepping unsteadily off the gurney and leaning onto Klaus. Sunny glanced around nervously for a hiding place. Her eyes quickly caught a door that read ‘Supply Closet’ and even if Sunny Baudelaire wasn’t the best reader, she still pointed her small finger towards the door.
“Over there!” Sunny cried as she raced towards the supply closet and opening it up.
“I guess so,” Klaus said doubtfully as he leaned Violet up against the wall. Violet began sliding down the moment that she was left to stand on her own. Klaus quickly turned towards the now empty gurney that Olaf had used to restrain his older sister. He gripped the gurney and waited until he saw the angry mob running towards him. He pushed the gurney with all his might towards the crowd that was trying to help Olaf capture the children. The gurney hit Brandon with enough force that it caused him to fall to the ground, wincing at the pain that had been afflicted on him.
Klaus hurried back to his older sister, who was practically napping on the floor. “Come on, Vi. This way. This way.” He dragged the limp Violet towards the supply closet as he gripped the doorknob with one hand while balancing his sister with the other. “I don’t know what we can do in a supply closet, but at least it’ll hide us for a few moments.”
Klaus helped his older sister through the door, immediately slamming the door behind him and locking it. Except for a small window in the corner, the closet looked identical to the one where Klaus and Sunny had hidden to decipher the anagram in the patient list. It was a small room, with only one flickering lightbulb hanging from the ceiling, and there were rows of white medical coats hanging from hooks, a rusty sink, huge cans of alphabet soup, cases of surgical tubing, and small boxes of rubber bands, and a small chair. But as the two younger Baudelaires looked at these supplies, they did not look like devices for translating anagrams or impersonating medical professionals. Klaus and Sunny looked at all these objects, and then at their older sister. To their relief, Violet’s face was a bit less pale, and her eyes were a bit less confused, which was a very good sign. The eldest of the three orphans needed to be as awake as she could be, because the items in the closet were looking less and less like supplies and more and more like materials for an invention.
You see, when Violet Snicket was five years old, she won her first invention contest with an automatic rolling pin she’d fashioned out of a broken window shade and six pairs of roller skates. As the judges placed the gold medal around her neck, she could remember her father saying, “I bet you could invent something with both hands tied behind your back.” and the judges agreed while Violet smiled proudly. She knew, of course, that her father and the judges did not mean that they were going to tie her hands behind her back and watch as she tried to invent something, but merely that she was so skilled at inventing that she could probably build something even with substantial interference, a phrase which here means ‘something getting in her way’.
The young Snicket girl had proved the judges and her father right dozens of times, of course, inventing everything from a lockpick to inventing a way to get herself and her younger brother out of jail back in the Village of Fowl Devotees with the substantial interference of being in a hurry and not having the right tools. But violet thought she had never had as much substantial interference as the lingering effects of anesthesia as she squinted at the objects in the supply closet and tried to focus on what her siblings were saying.
“Violet,” Klaus cried worriedly, watching Violet shakily push her hair behind her ear. Klaus couldn’t tell if she was shaking from anxiety and fear or if she was cold seeing that she was now barefoot and all she wore was a hospital gown. “I know that the anesthesia hasn’t completely worn off, but we need you to try to invent something...I can’t...last time I...I invented...something...he…he...” Klaus said as he closed his eyes slowly beginning to shake, placing his arms across his chest.
“Shhhh…” Violet cooed for longer than she wanted because her brain felt like mush and she forgot what she was focusing on. “...I...know,” she said faintly, rubbing her eyes with her hands slowly in a desperate attempt to focus her eyes.
“We’ll...we will...help you all we can,” Klaus said as he slowly began to calm down.
“My teeth are at…” Sunny chimed in, showing off her sharp teeth. “At your service.”
“Just tell us what we need to do,” Klaus cried.
“T-tell me….again...wha...what’s hap...pen...ning?” Violet asked, her head spinning as she slowly slid down the wall she was leaning on. Klaus ran to Violet’s aide hurriedly standing her up and sitting her down in the chair that Sunny had pushed towards her older siblings.
“The fire is consuming this entire hospital, and we have to get out of here quickly!,” he cried desperately as the henchperson of Indeterminate Gender, Brandon, and a few others from the angry mob began to knock on the door. “Oh and not only is Olaf after us, but another angry mob who thinks we’re criminals are right outside this door.”
Klaus ran towards the door to push his back against it, hoping to keep the mob out of the supply closet. He was well aware that he had already locked the door but he felt more secure pressing his weight against the door.
“Open up in there!” the Henchperson cried as the knocking ceased.
“What? No!” Klaus cried, giving an incredulous face towards the mere thought of surrendering now.
“Please,” the henchperson cried as they began to knock on the door once.
“ Violet! ” Klaus cried. “Right now would be a really good time for one of your plans!”
“Brain blast!” Sunny cried desperately.
“Wait, I thought I was Jimmy Neutron,” Klaus asked confused.
“Eh, you both are,” Sunny replied, with a shrug of her shoulders.
Violet slowly leaned back in the chair, pointing a limp finger at the window. “Open...the window,” she directed as Klaus gazed from the locked door to the window. He sighed as he ran towards the window opening it.
The middle orphan glanced outside. “It looks like we’re on the third floor, maybe the fourth. That’s probably around thirty or forty feet, I think,” he responded. “There’s so much smoke in the air, so it’s hard to tell. We’re not so high up, but we’re too high to jump.”
“Climb?” Sunny asked.
“There’s an intercom speaker right below us,” Klaus explained. “I suppose we could hang on to that and climb down to the bushes below, but we’d be climbing in front of a huge crowd…”
He turned to Violet, whose eyes were slowly closing, he could tell by how she strained her face that she was desperately trying to keep her eyes open. Klaus looked to Sunny worriedly. “ Vi, please,” he cried. “I hate to pressure you...but...I can’t do this without you,” he felt tears forming in his eyes.
“Can you invent something that can make us fly?” Sunny asked slowly.
Violet frowned and closed her eyes, slowly shaking her head. “S-sorry...no...fairy...dust here…” she cried.
“Violet?” Klaus called out, after a moment of watching his sister keep her eyes closed. “You’re not falling asleep, are you?” he asked gently but frantically.
“No,” she replied. “I’m...thinking.” she sighed. “We...need...to distract...the crowd...before...we...climb down,”
The two younger orphans nodded as Violet pointed a finger towards her brother. “Open...those...boxes...of rubber...bands. String them...together...to make...a cord,”
Klaus looked down and watched the volunteers giving evacuated hospital patients balloons. “But how will that distract the crowd?”
“I...don’t...know…” Violet admitted and looked to the floor. “I...I can’t...do this,”
Klaus and Sunny’s eyes widened when Violet said that. “Yes you can,” Sunny cried.
“I’m having...trouble...focusing...my...inventing...skills,” she admitted as her eyes filled to the brim with tears. “I’m...sorry,” Violet shakily tried to reach into her pocket until she realized she didn’t have any pockets. She began to shudder as she sat. Remembering her time as Olaf’s captive and how he had forced her to change from her overalls to the hospital gown. “He...he...he...he took my...last...ribbon…”
“Help,” Sunny said, as she walked over to her big sister.
“Don’t cry for help, Sunny,” Klaus said miserably. “No one will help us,”
“Help,” Sunny insisted as the youngest orphan grabbed a hold of one of the medical coats that hung on the coat rack. She opened her mouth wide and she bit down on the fabric, ripping a small strip off the coat with her teeth. Then she held up the strip of white cloth and handed it to Violet. “Ribbon,” Sunny explained as Violet gave her baby sister a weary smile. With unsteady fingers, the eldest orphan tied her hair up to keep it out of her eyes, using the thin strip of fabric instead of her hair ribbon. She closed her eyes again, and then slowly nodded.
“I know...it’s silly…” she admitted. “But...it helps,” she placed a shaky, pale hand on Sunny’s head. “Thank...you...Sunny,”
The eldest orphan sighed as she strained her face still trying to overcome the effects of the anesthetic. “Klaus...get to work...on the...rubber...bands. S-Sunny...can you open….one of these...soup cans?”
“Yes, I opened some,” Sunny began. “Earlier to help Klaus.”
Violet smiled at the toddler. With her hair up in a ribbon, even if the ribbon was spurious, her voice sounded a bit stronger and more confident than it had before, although both siblings could tell she was still disoriented. “We need...an...empty...can...asap,”
The three siblings worked quickly. Klaus opened a box of rubber bands and began tying them together using the Devil’s Tongue Knot. Sunny began to gnaw at the top of a can of soup and Violet slowly scooted her chair towards the small sink and splashed water in her face to try to make herself as alert as possible. Finally, Klaus had a long cord of rubber bands curled at his feet like a snake, Sunny had taken the top off a can of soup and was quickly pouring the contents of the can down the sink, and Violet was staring anxiously at the bottom of the closet door, from which a very thin wisp of smoke was crawling through.
“The fire...is...getting...closer,” she alerted her siblings. Even with the fire closing in on the orphans, the crowd outside the door hadn’t left and continued to bang on the door. Klaus imagined if it were any other henchperson who had found the children, that door would be torn off the hinges by now so Klaus was happy that it was the Henchperson of Indeterminate Gender who was leading the angry mob.
“The cord is all ready,” Klaus cried. Violet merely frowned.
“Not...long...enough,” she cried, looking around.
“Tube?” Sunny asked as she pulled a long piece of surgical tubing out of a bin that was placed on a few of the shelves in the supply closet.
Klaus looked at his sister confused but followed her orders. “Are you sure you tied your hair tight enough? How can we distract a crowd with an empty soup can?”
“Incompetent,” Sunny chimed in which meant, “I mean I know they are all incompetent and unhelpful as Mr. Poe but I don’t think they are all stupid enough to be distracted by an empty soup can.”
Klaus quickly translated for Violet. Violet gave a light giggle. “It’s not...an...empty...soup can. Well...not...anymore,” she explained slowly. “Now...it’s...a spurious...intercom. Sunny...poke one...hole in….the bottom...of the can,”
“Wha?” Sunny replied in complete and utter confusion, but she did as her elder sister asked because Sunny trusted Violet wholeheartedly even if she didn’t understand the point. Sunny knew that Violet’s inventive skills had helped save her, herself, and their brother before. So she quickly poked a hole in the bottom of the can using her sharpest tooth.
“Now...Sunny and I...are going...to hold...this near...the window…” she explained. “But we...must...make sure...the crowd...doesn’t see it…”
“I don’t follow,”
“The crowd...has to...think your...voice...is coming...from the...intercom.”
Violet put a limp hand on Klaus’ shoulder. “I know...but...the crowd...will know...something’s...up...if I do...it,”
Klaus sighed but nodded his head. Violet and Sunny held the empty can near the window, and Klaus leaned in and stuck his head inside it as if it were a mask. The middle orphan took a deep breath to gather his courage, and then he began to speak. From inside the can his voice sounded scratchy and faint as if he was talking with a piece of aluminum foil over his mouth, which was precisely how Violet wanted him to sound.
“Attention!” Klaus announced. “This is Mattathias Medical-School, head of Human Resources.” he rolled his eyes as he continued. “The murderous orphans have been spotted in the unfinished wing of the hospital.” Violet smiled as she and Sunny gave him a thumbs up. “We require everyone’s assistance in making sure they do not escape. Please rush over there right away. That is all!”
Klaus pulled his head out of the can and looked at his sisters. “Do you think it worked?”
Sunny opened her mouth to answer but she was interrupted by the voice of Brandon Spats. “Did you hear that?” the children heard him say. “The criminals are over in the unfinished wing of the hospital! Come on, everyone.”
“Maybe some of us should stay here at the front entrance, just in case,” the children heard Hal suggest.
Klaus sighed as he stuck his head back into the can that his sisters were holding. “Attention! This is Mattathias! No one should stay at the front entrance of the hospital! It’s too dangerous! Proceed at once to the unfinished wing. That is all.”
The three children snuck glances outside the window as the crowd slowly began to walk away from the front of Heimlich Hospital.
“It...worked,” Violet cried in disbelief. “We...fooled them…”
“We’re as good at tricking people as Olaf is,” Klaus commented, a frown forming on his face. “And at disguises...we fooled everyone but him,”
“Anagrams,” Sunny added.
“And lying...to...people,” Violet cried, thinking of Hal, the shopkeeper at Last Chance General Store and all the Volunteers Fighting Disease.
Klaus sighed. “Maybe we’re becoming villains after all,”
“No!” Sunny shrieked. “Don’t say that.”
“We’re...not...villains…” Violet countered, even if her gut feeling was saying something completely different. “We had...to do...tricky...things...in order...to save...our lives.”
“Olaf has to do tricky things,” Klaus countered. “To save his life,”
“Different,” Sunny argued.
Violet merely frowned. “Maybe...Klaus...is right. Maybe...it’s...not...different.” Violet said sadly. “Maybe…”
Violet was interrupted by the Henchperson of Indeterminate Gender sighing angrily and now using a fire extinguisher to break down the door that separated them from the three terrified and morally grey orphans.
“We can discuss this later,” Klaus said. “We have to get the fuck out of here!”
“Climb?” Sunny asked, looking at the rubber bands and surgical tubing.
Violet merely nodded. “Klaus, tie...our rope...to this pipe,” she said, pointing to a pipe that was located right next to the door. “This way...it breaks...our fall,”
“Is this safe? ” Klaus asked, taking another look out the window and feeling anxious about his sister’s plan and how high they are.
Klaus sighed. “I don’t know...this sounds risky,” he cried. “For one...I doubt the cord is long enough.”
“Look...it is... risky,” Violet admitted. “But...not...as risky...as a fire,”
“Or Olaf,” Sunny added nervously.
The Henchperson of Indeterminate Gender continued to pound on the door of the supply closet with the fire extinguisher. Black smoke was beginning to pour through the crack as if the henchperson was pouring ink into the closet. Even the air outside was unsettling and filled with smoke. Klaus sighed and hurriedly tied the cord to the pipe and then tugged on it to make sure it was secure.
“Okay...who’s...going...first?” Violet asked drowsily. She was leaning against the wall again since she didn’t have all the feeling in her legs back yet.
“First?” Sunny asked, confused.
Klaus merely gave her a look of utter disbelief.
“Fine...you two...are nervous.” Violet cried, shrugging her shoulders. Assuming that her siblings’ issue was the invention’s safety and not her insisting they take turns. “I...invented...it, so I’d...better...test it.”
Klaus growled and rushed over to Violet, seemingly irritated with his older sister. He grabbed her harshly by the shoulders, she fell slightly in his grasp which made him instantly regret rushing up to her. But he knew he had to drive a point across. He gripped her shoulders and shook her a bit. The way she was limp from the anesthetic made it look like Klaus was harshly shaking his sister but Sunny knew that wasn’t the case. “ Listen to me very carefully, Vi!” he hissed. “ There is no first! We are not separating ever again!” Violet stared back at him, he could still tell that she couldn’t entirely focus on anything. “ This family sticks together!” he yelled causing her to start to tear up. “ We are not splitting up!”
“But...but...b-but…” she sniffled. “Snickers...Snick...S-Snickets...take care...of...their own.” she reasoned as she put a shaky hand on her locket.
Sunny merely looked up at Violet. “So do Baudelaires.”
Violet only shook her head. “B-but...Olaf...Olaf said…”
Klaus jumped when it sounded like the Henchperson was finally creating damage against the door. “Goddammit, Vi! Fuck Olaf! I hope he fucking burns to death in this fire!” Klaus cried as he released his grip on sister but kept a gentle hand on her shoulder. “ Especially if he hurt you.” Klaus frowned as he said it, purposely emphasizing the word ‘hurt’ to try to hint at Olaf’s disgusting, vile behavior towards Violet that was different from his behavior towards Klaus and Sunny. Violet looked towards Klaus and then to Sunny, eventually frowning and softly shaking her head and giving a small shrug in response.
There was an uncomfortable silence between the three siblings until Violet turned towards both Klaus and Sunny. “It won’t...support all...of us,” she explained.
“We’re not leaving anyone behind,” he said firmly. “Not this time. Either we all escape, or none of us do.”
Klaus shook his head as he reached into his pockets and pulled out one of the old photographs that he and Sunny had retrieved back when they lived at their Aunt Josephine’s. Klaus unfolded it and his sisters could see it was a photograph taken some years before Violet was even born. In the middle of the photograph, just like the one hidden in the depths of Lemony Snicket’s wallet, stood three people. All smiling and holding each other's hands. Klaus pointed first towards the tall, skinny man with glasses, then he pointed to a brown-haired woman who wore a fierce smile as she held the hands of the men she loved, and then finally he pointed to a man who wore a frown on his face, and a fedora and trenchcoat in hopes of masking his identity. “Jacques Snicket...your uncle...said there was a survivor of a recent fire ,” Klaus explained, his voice thick with tears.
Violet’s eyes widened. “The film...do you...still...have it?”
“No...we had to give it to Esme to save you,” he explained. “But that’s not important.” he looked from his little sister to his big sister. “We have to survive and find them. All of us . We all deserve to see who the survivor is. We all deserve that happy ending we’ve been wanting for a while now.” the middle orphan began to tear up. As his guilt began to surface. “and I’d rather die than lose either one of my sisters... again.” The bookworm quickly wiped away a few of his tears. “I can’t...I won’t let him take either of you, again.”
Klaus looked down at Sunny and then to Violet. She stood shakily before him in a mere hospital gown and she was bruised. Her cheeks were still red, her wrists and ankles had severe chafing from her struggling against her restraints, that they were either raw or simply pink. “I’m so sorry, Violet.” Klaus cried.
“Not your fault,” Sunny said as she watched Violet struggle to speak.
He looked down at Sunny. “I’m so sorry to you, too, Sunny. He only got you because you were protecting me. You both...were protecting me when he took you . ” he cried.
“Not your fault,” Sunny reassured. “I’d do it again...in a heartbeat,”
Violet nodded slowly in agreement.
The three siblings were tearing up as the Henchperson created the beginnings of a hole in the wall.
“Agreed,” the two older siblings cried, although Violet sounded dizzier than Klaus.
Klaus picked up Sunny as Violet held the surgical tubing up so Klaus could spin himself and Sunny, effectively wrapping the tubing around the two siblings. He glanced towards Violet. “ We are going to survive...and find out what happened. We’ll find the survivor and either bring Olaf to jail...or kill him.”
“Down for murder,” Sunny cried.
“I...still...think if...we take...turns,” Violet protested frantically. “There’s a...better chance...that one of us...will survive.”
“All or nothing,” Sunny cried.
“We’re not leaving anyone behind,” Klaus said firmly. “ That’s what makes us different from Olaf and Esme.”
“ Ohana,” Sunny cried as she reached out and pulled the front of Violet’s hospital gown. The eldest orphan was still so limp that her minuscule effort succeeded and Violet now leaned on her and their brother. “ Just us,” she told Violet as Klaus wrapped a tight arm around both of his sisters as he slowly spun Violet around with them as he inched towards the window.
Violet didn’t fight. She didn’t struggle. She leaned in closer to her siblings feeling their warmth against her cold arms. “You’re right,” she said finally.
The hole in the door got even bigger as Violet shrieked.
“Don’t worry, Vi. We’re not leaving you behind again,” Klaus told her. Violet nodded as she did her best to wrap her arms tightly around her two younger siblings.
“I’ll...hold...on...to...you,” she explained.
“Same here,” Sunny cried as she wrapped her tiny arm around the arm that carried her and forced her tiny hand into her sister’s.
As Klaus carried his sisters to the window, he looked down once more, immediately regretting his decision. He glanced at the rubber band cord that Violet had him make and then at the surgical tubing he had tied it, too, and had now wrapped a good chunk of it around the three siblings.
“If it’s forty feet, we won’t make it.” He predicted.
“If it’s...say...maybe...thirty…,’ Violet began as she followed Klaus’ gaze down.
“We might,” Sunny shrugged.
The three children carefully made their way out of the window onto the small platform that lay alongside the window.
The huddled siblings barely fit on the ledge as the siblings looked down. This was at the same time as Olaf’s henchperson had successfully broken a hole in the door.
“Here I am, Nurse Lucafont.” the Henchperson called inside the empty supply closet. Utterly confused as to how the supply closet was empty. The children could hear the henchperson’s voice and look at one another nervously and then looked back down.
“I’m scared,” Violet admitted drowsily.
“I’m frightened,” Klaus cried.
“Sheer terror,” Sunny chimed.
As if they were thinking the exact same thing, each of the siblings gripped onto their two siblings as tight as they could. Violet managed to shout, “Hold on tight!” as the three siblings leaped out of the window of Heimlich Hospital.
STOP!
I am alone this evening, and I am alone because of several cruel twists of fate, a phrase which here means that nothing has happened the way I thought it should. Once I was a content individual, with a comfortable home, loving family that I loved very much, and a plethora of bedtime stories that were too strange to have been true...but...all of those things have been taken away from me, and now the only trace I have of those happy days are the photos I store in my pockets. As I sit in this very tiny room, printing these words with this very large pen, I feel as if our lives have been nothing but some dismal play, and that the playwright who invented these cruel twists of fate is somewhere far above me, laughing and laughing at their creation. This is not a pleasant way to feel, but this is how my story goes.
Now, despite my extensive research and my associate’s knowledge of abandoned VFD libraries, there are many things in this world that I do not know. I do not know how butterflies get out of their cocoons without damaging their wings. I do not know why anyone would boil vegetables when roasting them is tastier. I do not know how to make olive oil, and I do not know why dogs bark before an earthquake, and I do not know why some people voluntarily choose to climb mountains where it is freezing and difficult to breathe or live in the suburbs, where the coffee is watery and all of the houses look alike. I do not know why people start or join cults and I do not know how some people let revenge consume them to a highly unhealthy degree. I do not know how some people are brave enough to follow their passion in a world set out to destroy them. And I sadly, do not know how to stop the disastrous domino effect or fucked up twists of fates that seem to be plaguing several lives.
As such, I do not know where Violet Snicket or the Baudelaires are now, or if they are safe or if they are even still alive. But there are some things that I do know, thanks to the extensive research I’ve done investigating these cases, and one of them is that the window of the supply closet in the Ward for People with Nasty Rashes of Heimlich Hospital was not thirty or forty feet off the ground, as Klaus had guessed.
It’s twenty, which is exactly one foot higher than the length of the cord, so when the children leaped into the smoky air, clinging to each other for dear life, Violet’s invention worked perfectly. Like a yo-yo, the children bounced gently up and down, brushing their feet against one of the bushes planted in front of the hospital, and after a few bounces, Sunny released her grip on her siblings, although they kept theirs, and chewed through the elastic surgical tubing, biting through it just in time to smack Olaf’s henchperson in the face as they looked out the window. When the surgical tubing broke, Violet and Klaus fell the rest of the way to solid ground, Violet nearly toppling over. Klaus quickly put Sunny down and focused more of his attention and strength on Violet.
“We...made...it,” Violet cried.
“It was a close call,” Klaus agreed.
“But we survived,” Sunny argued.
The three siblings looked behind them at the hospital and saw just how close of a call it had been. The building looked like a fiery ghost, especially more so in a few places, with great bursts of flame coming from the windows, and oceans of smoke pouring from great gaping holes in the walls. The children could hear glass shattering as the windows burned away, and the crackle of wood as the floors began to fall through in some areas of the hospital. It occurred to the three children that their own homes must have looked like this on the day it burned down, and the three siblings stepped back from the burning building and huddled together as the air grew thick with ashes and smoke, obscuring the hospital from view.
“Where can we go?” Sunny asked.
“I don’t know. But any minute now someone’s bound to recognize us or realize that we’re not in the unfinished half of the hospital.” Klaus cried.
Klaus, with one hand holding Sunny’s and the other dragging Violet, began to walk away from the forming crowd. As more and more people pushed passed the children, rushing out of the hospital.
“Act casual,” Klaus told his sisters, noticing that Violet was adding more and more of her weight on to him.
“I’m...trying.;.”
Klaus glanced towards an empty ambulance. He tried to drag his sisters towards it in hopes of hot wiring it and driving far away from Olaf. But EMTs had beat him to it and began loading patients aboard.
“Keep your eyes open for those murderous brats!” one nurse yelled.
“I’ll find them. I know I will.” a volunteer fighting disease assured.
Klaus heard this and redirected himself and his sisters as he hurried behind a small half wall behind a few bushes in the front of the hospital. He was thankful for all the smoke in the air, it made this pitiful hiding place better.
“Stay down,” Klaus explained. “In The Encyclopedia of Escaping Arson, the author wrote that there’s more oxygen closer to the ground, so we can breathe more easily down here. But we need to get to some kind of shelter right away.”
Violet and Sunny scooted as close to Klaus as they could. Hoping to shrink themselves. Klaus and Violet both edged their heads up, Violet slowly beginning to focus better, as they gazed around for any way to escape. Klaus looked towards the left and Violet glanced towards the right, the smoky air was making it a bit difficult to see everything clearly.
“Where is there shelter?” Sunny asked. “Hospital is only building for miles.”
“...and it’s burning to the ground…” Klaus cried sadly.
“You!” a voice called out in the smoke. The three orphans froze. They did not freeze because a random passerby had recognized them and was pointing them out. They froze because the voice that had called out from the smoke was a voice all three siblings heard in their nightmares. Klaus gripped tightly to both of his sisters as Sunny let out a whimper and Violet let out a soft squeal as she and Klaus ducked their heads back down.
“He...didn’t...see...us, right?”
“I hope not,” Klaus cried.
The three children stayed as low as they could as they listened in on the madman’s rage.
“You!” Olaf called again, this time slamming his hand on the hood of his car. “Hooks for hands!” Olaf barked. “This way!”
The siblings breathed a quick sigh of relief, realizing that Olaf had not been referring to them but instead one of his henchpeople. With this newfound knowledge, Sunny slowly crawled over Klaus and Violet to etch her head around the edge of the half wall. Where only one eye could see Olaf while the other’s vision was obstructed.
Sunny watched a long, black shape emerge from the smoky air, and she could see it was an automobile, pulling up in front of the hospital. Not too far from the children. An automobile is somewhat like a shelter, but the siblings froze on the ground and dared not crawl an inch farther toward that car.
“Hurry up Esme!” Olaf yelled. “Hurry up! Or I’ll leave you behind!”
“We’re coming, darling!” Esme cried out as she hurried towards the car.
“Can you see the car in the smoke?” he asked.
“Yes, darling,” she replied. “Open the trunk I’ll throw the costumes in.” The three children held their breath as they listened to her odd footsteps as she walked right passed them, towards and around Olaf’s car.
“Oh, alright,” Olaf sighed, and Sunny watched in silence as the tall figure of her enemy stepped out of his vehicle.
“Wait up, Olaf!” the bald man yelled.
“You fool! I told you to call me Mattathias until we leave the hospital grounds!” Olaf growled as he opened the trunk. He watched as Esme threw the costumes in. He merely glared at her.
“What?”
He sighed angrily. “You lost my pet and the Baudelaires!” She opened her mouth to argue but he merely shook his head. “ But... it’s not only that! ” he yelled as he punched the roof of his car angrily. Esme rolled her eyes dismissively as she rounded the car and took her seat next to Olaf.
“You know this is horrific!” Esme whined. “We never found the sugar bowl after that stupid librarian told me it would be here!”
Olaf rolled his eyes at the mention of the sugar bowl.
“It’s worse than that,” he hissed.
“I know, and the bratty orphans escaped again,” Esme said rolling her eyes.
“Oh, it’s very, very worse than that,” he hissed in annoyance.
Esme looked to Olaf confused. Olaf slowly turned towards Esme as he took a deep breath, grasping the steering wheel tightly. “ There may be a survivor of a recent fire,” he hissed as her eyes widened, and then her expression shifted to match her fiery glare as she thought of the woman who had stolen everything from her.
“ Beatrice…!” Esme cried through gritted teeth.
Violet gasped as she heard sirens approaching. “The...police...and fire...fight...ers are here,”
“If they already thought we were murderous kidnappers, now they’ll think we’re all arsonists.” Klaus reasoned. “We need an escape,”
“Do...you...do you trust...me?” Violet asked after a moment of staring hard at Olaf’s trunk. The trunk was opened to where Violet could see that the lid of the trunk was peppered with tiny holes, bullet holes, it looked like, undoubtedly from being pursued by the police.
“...yeah?” Klaus answered back hesitantly. It was no lie that he trusted Violet with his life but her asking worried him for a number of reasons.
Violet leaned as close as she could to her siblings so she could whisper to them without being heard. “We’ve...got...to go in...there,” she said.
“Where?” Klaus whispered in reply.
“We... need to get...in O-Olaf’s...tr-trunk,” Violet reasoned.
“ Wha?!” Sunny shrieked in a horrified whisper.
“Are you still that high off the knock out drugs?” Klaus asked as he and Sunny glanced at one another in disbelief as if there was no way Violet had suggested for the three siblings to voluntarily stuff themselves into Olaf’s trunk.
“Oh yeah,” Violet said giggling. She placed her hand in Klaus’ hair. “You’ve got...rainbow... hair.” She gently slapped Klaus’ face. “Like...a clown,”
“I can’t tell if you’re joking or serious,” Klaus replied in an annoyed tone.
“Doesn’t....matter. But that’s not...the point. We...have to avoid...getting cap...tured,” she said, her eyes rolling back slightly in her head. “and...find out...who the...survivor...is.”
“Getting in that trunk is getting captured!” Klaus argued.
Olaf took a deep breath and then glanced at one of his henchmen who stood outside of the car, looking around aimlessly. “Get in this car this instant! I’m leaving on the count of three! It’s been splendid setting this fire, but we’ve got to hunt down a certain...survivor...before those brats do!”
“Or VFD,” Esme added. “You know, the real VFD full of hypocrites, not those idiotic singers!”
“Just one second, boss. We’re waiting for Ainsley,” the Hook-Handed Man explained.
“I’m not going to wait around to find out if that fool lived or died!” Olaf yelled. “One!”
The Hook-Handed man tapped his hook worriedly on the roof of his boss’ car as he gazed around. Violet unknowingly lifted her head a bit until she felt as though the henchman had seen her and she ducked down worriedly.
“Y-you said you...trusted me,” Violet whined.
“I’d rather die than get into that fucker’s trunk!” Klaus hissed.
“Don’t you want to...bring him to justice?” Violet asked. “Don’t you...wanna find the...survivor? And clear...our names?”
Klaus looked to his sister, frowning. “Of course, I do. But I don’t want to die before we can!”
“No, no,” Sunny cried as she shook her head. “Been there...done that.”
Violet frowned as she placed her hands in her siblings and she held their hands as firmly as she could, to the point where it hurt to hang on to them. “Think of... everything... we survived together, ” she whispered, looking from her burdened brother to her scared sister. “We’ve lived through countless...unfortunate events...only to find ourselves... alone. ”
“Just us,” Sunny reminded her.
“I know…” Violet replied, smiling at Sunny. “But if one of...our parents...survived. It’ll all be worthwhile!” She released her grip on her siblings. “We have to find them...if it’s the last thing we do.”
Sunny sighed as she gazed at the gaping trunk, which looked like the mouth of some dark and smoky beast, eager to devour her and her siblings. As it had once devoured her and her friends, Duncan and Isadora Quagmire, not too long ago. But she knew her big sister was right and she trusted Violet to get her and her siblings out of danger, not in it. “You’re right,” Sunny murmured finally. “Getting in that trunk is our only hope.”
Violet smiled as she looked towards Klaus, who merely shook her head defiantly. “You’re right. You’re right about all of that. But I’m sorry, I’m not getting into that trunk.”
“Klaus...come on,” Sunny pleaded.
“What choice do we have?” Violet asked. “Trust me...I wish we had another escape...but we don’t, Klaus.”
“Violet, I am not getting in that trunk and there’s nothing you can do to convince me otherwise,” Klaus folded his arms across his chest. “You aren’t thinking straight, obviously. So I guess I’ll think of something.”
“ Two!” They heard Olaf shout to his henchpeople as the Hook-Handed Man smiled and rushed Ainsley into their boss’ car.
Klaus continued to shake his head at the sound of Olaf’s voice.
Violet rolled her eyes, tapped her finger on her chin deep in thought. She glanced at Sunny and a wicked smile grew on her face. “I...know..how to get...you in that trunk,”
“What did I just say?” Klaus asked. “I’m not getting in…” he began before Violet stood up shakily, picking up Sunny in the process and running stealthily towards Olaf’s trunk.
“No, you did not just…” Klaus cried angrily. “Dammit, Violet!” he hissed following her quickly, continuing to look behind the siblings to make sure that no one was following them.
Violet stumbled as she reached the trunk. She fell to the ground, shielding Sunny from the pavement. “Whoopsie,” she whispered.
Klaus catches up to his sisters and merely glares at Violet as the three crawl a few more inches to the trunk. “Of all the dirty handed tricks you could pull…” he started, in a hushed whisper.
“It got you over here...didn’t it?” Violet asked as she opened Olaf’s trunk slowly. The children ducked down low as the trunk lid stayed opening welcoming them inside with a damp, terrible odor that had Violet having second thoughts.
Violet stumbled awkwardly as she tried to maneuver herself into Olaf’s trunk while still kneeling down. “Give me a hand, please,” Violet begged her brother. Klaus sighed as he reluctantly helped Violet into the trunk.
“We’ll be able to breathe, right?” Sunny asked, worriedly as Violet rolled as far as she could allowing her brother and sister room. Violet felt her knee slam against something but she didn’t pay it any attention as she felt the shuffling of Olaf’s troupe member trying to get situated in the back seat.
“Yes,” Klaus whispered as he picked up Sunny. “Air will come through the bullet holes,” he explained to his baby sister as he laid her atop of their big sister. The second Sunny was laying down on Violet, she began to squirm and shake as if she were having a panic attack. Klaus frowned as he glanced down at Violet, who merely frowned back. Violet hastily unclasped her locket and handed it to Sunny.
“Sometimes when I’m scared…” Violet admitted. “The only thing that calms...me down. Is our Mama.” Violet shakily moved her hands to open the locket but she was having slight difficulties. Sunny reached up and opened the locket for her. Both sisters gazed up at the picture of their mother, smiling down on them.
Klaus sighed as he grabbed hold of the trunk. “This is not the sort of shelter I had in mind,” he said begrudgingly. “But...I guess it might do.”
“It’ll have to do,” Violet whispered to him. And with that, the middle orphan maneuvered himself inside his enemy’s trunk, beside his older sister.
“ Three!!” Olaf shouted as Violet simultaneously closed the trunk just as the bald man slammed the passenger back side door shut. Once Violet had closed the trunk, the siblings were left in utter darkness, and their shelter rattled and shook as Olaf started the engine and began to drive across the landscape, which was as flat and desolate as ever. But the children could not see outside, of course. In the blackness of the trunk, they could not see anything at all. Sunny whimpered and handed Violet back her locket.
“We’re right here, Sunshine,” Klaus whispered, trying to hide the fact that he, too, was terrified. They could only hear their long, shivering breaths as the air rushed through the bullet holes, and feel their shoulders tremble as they shivered in fear.
Klaus pulled Sunny a bit towards him so that she was now laying on both him and Violet and not squishing Violet entirely. Violet’s head rolled around as Olaf drove.
“Here,” Klaus whispered, prompting for Violet to lift her head. He placed his arm underneath his sister’s head giving her some comfort as Sunny grabbed onto Violet’s hand. Violet snuggled closer to her siblings still high on the anesthetic.
“You...guys came back...for me,” she cried, tears flowing.
“That’s what siblings do,” Sunny explained.
“You’re our sister,” Klaus agreed.
“Where to next, boss?’ the children could hear the Hook-Handed man ask.
“How the fuck would I know!?” Olaf yelled as he reached outside his window to remove a flyer that was obstructing his vision. “I’m not…”
He stopped once he read the flyer. “...a fortune teller. But I know who is,” he said wickedly as he began to laugh maniacally.
The children shifted slightly when Olaf slammed his foot on the gas. The three siblings huddled together as tightly as they could. Both Violet and Klaus held one of Sunny’s tiny hands. Both older siblings could feel their sister tremble as she laid on them inside Olaf’s trunk. They knew that she was having flashbacks of her time in captivity with the Quagmires. They were trying to do all they could to relax her.
As the three gazed outside the bullet holes of Olaf’s car, it was as if they were stargazing, although the siblings were all falling victim to their thoughts. Klaus sighed, breaking the silence.
Sunny held on tightly to her siblings’ hands trying to stay calm and not freak out that she had once again found herself inside Olaf’s trunk. The bitter stench was bringing back memories that Sunny would rather stay buried away from her psyche. She knew circumstances were slightly different, this time. She wasn’t forced into the trunk against her will, she had been persuaded by her elder sister to voluntarily enter the trunk. She had her siblings and she knew they would never let anyone hurt her and the biggest difference is that Olaf and Esme had no idea that she and her siblings were hitching a ride in his trunk.
Klaus’ eyes slowly began to fall as he slightly shifted. He was exhausted in more ways than one. But as he felt Violet shift her head slightly on his arm and Sunny grip tighter to his hand, he knew it was what he had to do. He didn’t know exactly what had happened to his sister during her time in Olaf’s clutches and he was scared that she might not know the answer and it pained him to know that Olaf was the only person that could give his sister closure on that topic. He sighed as quietly as he could. He wasn’t the happiest about how Violet convinced him to get into Olaf’s trunk but he would have to deal with it. Klaus was fighting the urge to sleep because he refused to be asleep if the children were discovered and he wouldn’t be able to fight for his sisters. He felt like he’s failed them so many times already, that he needs to step up his game and be there more for them. That’s what he vowed to do for his sisters and whoever the survivor was.
Violet held onto Sunny’s arm as she began to silently sob. She was still scared that they were now in the trunk of the man who wants to do nothing but harm them. She was still contemplating everything that had happened to her or what she suspected happened. Violet was unsure of a lot of things right now and how close she was to her siblings was one of them. In her head, Olaf and Esme’s words ring endlessly on a tiresome loop that was continually driving Violet insane. Violet still had huge insecurities but she was starting to doubt a few of her insecurities.
If what they said was true...Klaus had every chance to take Sunny and run...but they stayed. They rescued me. He kept himself and his sister in danger to save me . Why didn’t he take Sunny and run? She pondered to herself. She desperately hoped, Maybe just maybe Olaf was wrong and Klaus did see her as a sister, not just a protector.
Violet sighed, still coming down from the amount of anesthetic Olaf had administered to her. “What’s...that stanza...again?” she asked hastily.
“What?” Klaus whispered back, confused. His eyes were closed as if he had lost his fight against sleep.
“The Snicket lad?” Sunny whispered in the softest of whispers, terrified to see what Olaf would do if he heard the name ‘Snicket’ and then opened his trunk to find one and two Baudelaires.
Violet nodded. “You know...you guys are gonna love him,” she replied in a whisper.
Klaus and Sunny looked at one another both knowing what their sister meant. Although both younger siblings had different predictions when it comes to the survivor, they allowed Violet the courtesy of being able to freely share hers.
“If you drive away in secret,” Klaus whispered. “You’ll be a volunteer,”
“So don’t scream,” sunny whispered.
“When we take you…” Violet whispered.
“ The world is quiet here…” the three siblings recited simultaneously as they held on tighter to each other.
It was not the sort of shelter the children had in mind, never in their entire lives, but as they huddled as close together as they could, they guessed it might do. For these three orphans, if indeed they were still orphans, the shelter of Count Olaf’s trunk would have to do, until something better came along.