Two is Company, Three is a Crowd
(thank you to @/very-freakin-effable for the title I SUCK at naming shi)
This surprisingly didn't take as long as I expected it to. I think it's p gud but lmk wut yall think!!
Word Count: 2.5k
TLDR: Alastor has the flu and while Charlie wants to help, he refuses because he knows how overbearing she will be. Angel does his best to assist and keep Charlie away.
CW: Sneezing, coughing, foul language, sexual jokes, threats of violence, dust allergies, pet names, radio/dust, cha/ggie
“hD’HTCHh!”
“Three.”
“kK’Dht!!”
“Four.”
“eh…hEH-!! aA‘dSHTDt!!”
“Fucking Christ Al. How many you got in there?” The spider laughs. He is promptly met with a glare. “Shut up.” Angel scoffs. “Rude.” Angel reaches for the deer’s staff. “Break that and see what happens to you.” Angel rolls his eyes. “Please. You would never hurt me.” Angel gives it back to Alastor, who makes it disappear.
Angel sighs, sitting on his boyfriend’s lap. “Excuse you,” Alastor shoots him a look. “What? You’ve only got one chair up here. Where else am I supposed to sit?” “Might I suggest the floor?”
“Shut up.”
Why couldn’t another chair be pulled up? The two had retreated to Alastor’s radio tower, seeking shelter from Charlie’s inevitable, suffocating concern. It happens if anyone catches a bug, but especially Alastor and Vaggie. Vaggie for obvious reasons, but Alastor? Who knows. Maybe it’s because he’s the “host” of the hotel and he’s “important” for their image.
Alastor’s radio tower is the one place in the hotel Charlie didn’t have access to. He simply refused to give her a key. While it did take a bit, he eventually trusted Angel not to lose the key and gave him his own.
Angel sighs. He begins fiddling with a knob on the radio, only to have his hand smacked. “Hey!” Angel makes a face, rubbing the back of his hand. “Stop touching everything.” Alastor readjusts the radio knob. “I’m bored. Ain’t nothing to do up here. How is it that you can sit up here for hours on end?”
“It doesn’t take much to keep myself entertained.” Angel smirks. “Oh? Why didn’t you just say so?” Alastor snaps his head around to face him. “That’s not what I meant and you know it!” Angel puts his hands up in defense. “Alright, alright, geez. Don’t get your panties in a twist.”
Alastor sighs, taking out a note pad. “As I was saying, it doesn’t take much to stay busy. I’ll often put on music and jot down ideas of discussion. Sometimes about the hotel, although those are far and few between. Often they are about chats I’ve had with Rosie or other news regarding cannibal town. They seem to be the only ones who appreciate my media, apart from those who need a break from Vox.”
The deer begins jotting down his thoughts on the note pad. Angel steals a piece of paper and starts folding it into a crane. The two sit for a while, the radio playing softly in the background, chatting casually. Alastor sniffles occasionally.
Angel pulls out his phone, rolling his eyes as he checks his messages. “What is it?” Alastor glances up. “It’s Charlie. She says she’s sick of our “shenanigans” and wants us to come back to the hotel.” Alastor sighs. “You may leave if you wish. I am perfectly happy where I am.”
Angel groans. “Come on Al, I’m sick of being up here. Just go down for a bit and deal with Charlie. Worst case scenario we lock ourselves in my room and wait it out until Vaggie comes to our rescue.” Alastor puts down his pen and turns to his partner. “As I said, you are welcome to go whenever you’d like.”
Angel makes a kissy face. “And leave you here all by your lonesome while you’re sick? No way.” Looking around, Angel grabs something from off of the shelf. It’s a manual of some sort. “The hell is this?” Alastor, who went back to writing, glances up briefly.
“That’s a book for something I believe Zilla called a “boom box”. Claims it’s a more modern version of a radio. I never got around to looking at it.” He points over to the other side of the room. “It’s in that box if you wish to keep yourself busy with it.”
Angel examines the manual, blowing the dust off of the front cover. “Wh- Angel!” Angel flinches. “Shit- sorry babe. You good?” Alastor’s breath begins hitching softly. “Al?” Angel reaches out but Alastor pushes him away, turning to face the other direction.
“eEH’TZzh!! h’T-KkTCH! ‘Xx-hT! eH..hE-EhH-!! hH- hH’AHT-KTCH!!” Angel flinches, covering his ears as the music turns into loud radio static mixed with microphone feedback. “Fuckin-!!” Angel reaches over to turn the radio off. Alastor sniffles, coughing harshly.
With a snap of his fingers, a tissue box appears. Angel snatches it out of the air and holds it out to him. “Just let em out. Ain’t no one else up here.” Alastor’s breath falters as the onslaught of sneezes continues.
“iI’HTCHEh!! eH’TD-cHEGgh! eh’H-?? nH-!! hE’T-SCHEh!! hH-!! ‘aA’TC-EHgh!!” Angel frowns as Alastor takes the tissues. He blows his nose, groaning and muttering to himself under his breath. “Fucking hell Alastor.”
“I thin’gk-sNFF!!- it would be i’nd your best in’derest to sit elsewhere.” Alastor gently removes Angel from his lap. “I’d rather n’dot pass this o’nd to you.”
Angel frowns, but gets up, understanding it’s for the better. Alastor almost looks saddened at the fact that Angel had to move. He shivers quietly, wrapping his coat tighter around himself. The lack of warmth without Angel isn’t helping.
Angel frowns. “C’mon Al. I know you don’t wanna, but you should really go back down. Staying cooped up in here ain’t gonna do you any good.” With little energy left to argue, Alastor sighs. “Fine.” Angel smiles sympathetically, offering his hand for the other to take. “C’mon. Let’s get you in bed.
Normally, Alastor would teleport the two of them to his room, but with his lack of energy, they’re better off walking. Angel slowly opens the hotel door. “Alright, let’s make this quick,” he says in just above a whisper. He begins slowly walking towards the stairs when Charlie spots them. “Angel!”
“Shit! Uh, hey Charlie.” Charlie hurries over to him, looking worried. “Have you seen Alastor? I’m worried about him. He looked awful when I saw him this morning.”
Angel gives her a look. “What do you mean have I seen him? He’s right-” Angel turns only to find the demon gone. “Oh come on Al!” Angel groans. “Damnit. Gimme a second, I’ll go find him.” Angel stomps off.
Charlie goes to follow him, but Angel stops her. “Don’t. Trust me, it’s for your own good.” Charlie sighs. “Alright. Well, let me know when you find him.” She turns and walks back into the lobby. “Yeah, will do.” No he won’t.
“Alastor!” Angel swings open the door of his room. “You really just left me alone with her like that? We could have just gotten here straight from the tower if- you alright?” The deer is curled up, ears drooping, shivering as he sits against Angel’s bed.
“I apologize dear. I…would have taken both of us. I just…didn’t know if I could do it safely.” Angel walks over to sit with his partner. “Al, babe, you look awful.” Angel brings a hand to his forehead, to which Alastor doesn’t attempt to pull away- not a good sign.
“Angel?” Charlie pokes her head in the door. “Did you find him?” Alastor looks up from Angel to see none other than the princess of hell in front of him. The second Charlie sees him, she rushes into the room. “Alastor, oh my gosh, what happened to-”
“Charlie- No!” Alastor’s horns begin growing as the room emits a faint greenish glow. Symbols fill the room. The demon’s scleras turn black. He lets out a low growl. Angel wraps three of his arms around Alastor, one pointing to the door. “Charlie, get outta here,” Angel warns her. Alastor’s ears are pointed back as the room glows brighter. Impressive for how weak he is.
“No. I’m not just going to leave him like this. He’s my friend, too.” Charlie takes another step forward. She kneels down in front of him. When she reaches her hand forward to touch him, Alastor snarls at her.
“Charlie, leave before you get yourself killed. Al, knock it off.” She pulls her hand back, but remains where she is. “Angel, please. Just let me help him. He’s in no condition to put up a fight even if he wanted to. I know you care for him deeply but-” “What the hell is going on up here?” Vaggie opens the door only to see an absolute disaster waiting to happen unfold in front of her. “Charlie, get away from him!” Charlie turns to her girlfriend. “Vaggie, look at him. We can’t just leave him like this.”
Angel sounds genuinely panicked. “Charlie, I’m warning you. Leave. Just because he won’t hurt me doesn’t mean he won’t hurt anyone else.” He looks up at Vaggie with a pleading look.
“Babe, remember what we said about boundaries. We need to give them some space.” Vaggie gently takes Charlie’s hand and leads her out of the room. Thank you, Angel mouths to her. Vaggie nods, shutting the door behind her.
Angel sighs, turning back to Alastor. “Babe, you can’t just do that to people. You scared me.” Alastor’s horns shrink back to their usual size and the room returns to its former state. His ears have gone from rigid back to drooping, his smile looking strained. “I didn’t know how else to make her go away. I was…scared of her seeing me like this.” Angel frowns. “I know you were, but she was only trying to help you.”
Angel pulls him to his feet and helps him into the bed. “Take your coat off. Get nice and comfy.” Alastor allows his coat to be removed as Angel tucks the sheets around him. “I’m sorry that happened with Charlie. She’s trying her best. I know her best isn’t always great in favor of others, but she’s trying.”
Angel sits at the foot of the bed, wanting to give Alastor room to breathe, especially after what just went down.
The two sit in silence for a moment before Angel gets up. “You need to take something. And don’t argue with me about it. I’m not giving you a choice.” Angel digs around in his bathroom cabinet before pulling out a bottle of cold and flu medicine.
“Here, take this. We also have decongestants and medicated cough drops if you need em.” Angel pours some into the provided measuring cup and hands it to him, which he takes without hesitation. “Good. I’ll be back with some water.” Angel gives him a kiss on the head before turning and leaving.
As Angel heads down the stairs, Charlie runs up to him again. “Angel I-” He puts his hand up. “I know, I know- you’re sorry. It’s fine.” Angel sighs. “I’m not mad at you. It’s not that I don’t trust you, because I do. It’s that I don’t trust Al. Not while he’s in this state. He can be…unpredictable at times. He was scared. I doubt he would’ve hurt you but I didn’t wanna take any chances. He usually does that as a scare tactic.”
Charlie frowns. “I shouldn’t have pushed that far. But I still want to make it up to him.” Angel hesitates for a moment, choosing his words carefully. “To be honest, I think the best way you can make it up to him is just by leaving him be. Like I said: I know he’d never hurt me, but I can’t vouch for anyone else.” Charlie looks at the floor, feeling guilty. “Alright. Just promise you’ll let me know if you need any help.” Angel chuckles. “I promise, but you gotta trust me on this one. I got this.” He walks past her and into the kitchen to get a glass of water before heading back upstairs.
“Hey Al?” Angel enters the room, quietly closing the door behind him. “I got you some water. Alastor?” Angel walks over to the bed to find Alastor fast asleep. He’s completely passed out. Angel can’t help but laugh. The big bad scary radio demon. He looks so peaceful.
Putting the glass down on the table next to the bed, Angel climbs in bed with him. “Angel?” The deer asks hoarsely. Angel giggles. “Sorry. Didn’t mean to wake you.” Alastor mumbles quietly.
Alastor rolls over, pressing himself against Angel. Angel blushes, hesitantly wrapping all of his arms around his partner. Is this real? Is he dreaming? This can’t possibly be happening.
Alastor, the most feared overlord in all of Hell, curled up in the arms of a lowly pornstar such as himself? No way.
Angel gives him a kiss on the head. Alastor hums softly. “You’re warm. It feels nice…” Angel giggles, petting his head. “Thanks. I’m glad you’re cozy.”
Unfortunately for Alastor, the warmth comes with a small price. With his face buried in his boyfriend’s chest, the spider’s chest fluff is brushing against his sensitive nose. Alastor sniffles quietly, trying to dismiss the sensation.
“You good babe?” Angel looks down. The act of shifting positions only makes things worse. “hH…hHH-!! Ah-ang’EH!! Angel-!!”
Pulling away, Angel sits up. “You ok Al?” Alastor rubs his nose, doing his best to keep from sneezing. Not now. If Charlie hears him, she’ll freak! He can’t. He must delay the inevitable for as long as possible-
“hH’NXT! eH’KHShKT!! heH…eEh-!! ‘hHT!! -KTCH! h’DT!!” Alastor presses the back of his hand to his face. Make as little noise as possible. That’s the main objective for right now.
Angel shoots him a look. Grabbing a tissue box, he puts it on the bed between them. “We’ve talked about this. Holding it in won’t do you any good. Just let it happen.”
All shame and dignity now thrown out of the window, Alastor gives in. “hH’ET-DChEUh!! aAH’DTCHu! eh’H-!! ‘tCHUh e’EK’SH-EUGh!! hAH-!! ahH-?! -kK’TShEHh!! Ugh…snDRFF!! Fu-UH’CK-!!...hhh, fugh’ck m’be…”
Usually Angel would’ve made some sort of provocative joke, but not this time. There’s a time and place for everything, and now is not that time. “You done, babe?” He hands his boyfriend the tissue box, smiling sympathetically.
The look on Alastor’s face says that he appreciates the lack of sexual jokes. He takes several tissues and nods. “I’mb fin’de n’dow. Tha’hn’k gg’you my love.”
Angel smiles. “Of course. Anything for you.” Alastor saying the “l-o-v-e” word doesn’t go unnoticed by Angel. That’s how he knows it’s genuine.
Angel picks up his phone as it vibrates in his pocket. “Hey, how’s it going up there?” Angel chuckles, typing back. “He’s fine. Just a bit sleepy…and sneezy LOL. Thx for checking in.” Angel puts his phone down, smiling. He notices Alastor panting softly, clearly feverish.
“C’mere babe.” Angel opens his arms again. Alastor puts up no fight and happily accepts, this time facing away from Angel’s chest, not wanting a repeat of what had just happened.
Perfectly content with being spooned by his partner, Alastor soon falls asleep. Angel kisses the top of his head. If he gets sick, so be it. He doesn’t care. As long as his beloved radio demon is happy. Besides, the times that Alastor is willing to be affectionate are far and few between, even when he is sick.
When the man wakes up, he finds his partner's hands still wrapped around him. Angel had also fallen asleep. Alastor smiles, pressing closer to his boyfriend. This is nice, he could get used to this. Or maybe it’s just the cold medicine messing with his brain. Who knows.
Angel eventually wakes up, rubbing his eyes. “Hey babes,” he says groggily. “You feeling better?” Alastor smiles, looking less strained. “I am. Thank you Angel.” The spider giggles. “Of course. Anything for you antlers.”
“Angel?” “Yeah babe?” “I owe you a favor.” Angel smiles. “Aw, you don’t owe me anything. We’re partners. We help each other out.” Alastor chuckles. “I know, but still. When the time comes, expect that I will return the favor.” Angel gives him another kiss on the head. “Alright Al. Thank you.”