Ahh, more Werewolf Gene AU stuff
Stan would be terrible at teaching the pups how to be werewolves, I just know it
Stan: And then, once you've dropped the box in the hole, you turn around and bury it! Like you're playing a game of... uh... I dunno, would "Hide the Money" be considered a game?
Dipper: Grunkle Stan? Do we have to bury this money?
Stan: Kiddo, sometimes you have to bury an insane amount of money in the middle of the woods to make it in this crazy world.
Mabel, wagging her tail: Yeah, Dipper! We gotta beat the bank to the punch!
Dipper: The punch of what, though?
Stan: *Puts His Hands on the Kids' Shoulders* All the steaks and bones in the world.
Dipper and Mabel: Woooooow.
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Dipper: Grunkle Stan? Grunkle Fidds?
Stan: Whaddup?
Fidds: Is somethin' wrong, honey?
Dipper: I mean... I wouldn't really say wrong, so much as... horribly terribly awful?
Stan, going tense: Dipper, what does that mean?
Dipper: Well... I may or may not have dared Mabel to blend a bunch of random food and toothpaste together and eat it all.
Fidds, completely exasperated: And why, pray tell, would ya do somethin' like that?
Dipper: She bit my ear too hard while we were playing...
Stan, relaxing slightly: Okay, so where exactly does the "horribly terribly awful" part come in?
Dipper: I think Mabel has food poisoning... werewolves don't have advanced immune systems, do we?
Stan: Not when we're eating things that would make Gordon Ramsay die on sight, we don't.
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Mabel: Grunkle Stan? Why does Grunkle Fidds get so mad when me and Dipper accidentally pop his blood bags?
Stan: Well, those bags are the only thing keeping your Grunkle Fidds from going crazy and killing people, Pumpkin. He's gotta drink blood to survive, just like we've gotta eat meat.
Mabel: Okay, okay. Where does he get the blood from?
Stan: I think it's time we stopped talking for now.
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Fidds, tucking Dipper into bed: G'night, Mason. Y'all have a good sleep.
Dipper: I'll sleep well when I figure out how to sleep without crushing my tail every time I sleep the wrong way.
Fidds: Aw, I'm sorry, hon. Would ya like me t' try and make ya somethin' t' sleep better?
Dipper: Nah, I'll just train my body to stay still like a log when I sleep. Then I'll be pain free!
Fidds: *Chuckles* Alright, Mason. Do what ya gotta do.
Stan, dragging Mabel into the room by her left leg: Comin' through with a stray! *Drops Mabel Onto Her Bed*
Mabel: *Squeals with Glee*
Stan, smirking: Alright, you. Sleep. Now.
Mabel: But Grunkle Stan! I'm not tired! *Passes Out Literally One Second Later*
Stan, to Dipper: Night, kid.
Dipper, trying not to laugh: Goodnight Grunkle Stan.
