Ever feel like you are living a pointless life?
Cause you have a job and your working hard for a living making money paying bills.
You are not married you don’t have anybody in your life but your family.
You only have like three people that will text you. But they are on and off Facebook for other reasons. So basically all day you have nobody to talk to while you are at work. The only people you talk to are the people you work with.
By the end of the day you come home and clean house then go set on the porch and cry all afternoon cause you have nothing better to do with you life. But set there and cry and be disappointed in your self.
That’s my life! Everyday I have nothing to do but go to work and come home.
I feel like I have nobody I’m so lonely that I feel like this is not enough for me. I am constantly feeling like a worthless pice of crap.
I got to work for 8 hours a day and I clean at a college.
I come home and clean the house.
If is nice outside I will set outside and enjoy the nice weather. Sometimes setting outside helps me think. So, things that happened in the past when I was going to school. All of these thoughts and memories flush through my brain. So all of the pain comes back and hits me directly in the face. So, I start sobbing in pain cause I can’t stop thinking about how I work my ass off and feel like I don’t do anything and I don’t feel like i am good enough. I work my self to the point I feel super exhausted and when I get home I don’t wanna do anything. But I do I dragging my ass home and I clean it would make me so happy if I were to get more appreciated and more help when I need help.
Better yet I wanna get out on my own
Live my life the way I want too
But honestly I wanna give up on my dreams
Because life is not fear and you can’t always get what you want
But when I set outside and think and cry I think about all of that stuff.
I know I am stronger then that I can by pass it all cause I’ve done all of it in the past.
But it feels like fighting all this is getting more and more difficult.
It’s like my life is swinging out of control and I don’t know how to hold on much longer.
I don’t need a rope made out of string. I need a rope made out of metal.
The stronger I am the better!