#source: textpost

[incorrectly-quoting-mxtx]

Shang Qinghua: I diagnose you with “gets no bitches”.

Shen Qingqiu: Oh by all means, preach to me from your ivory tower of zero hoes.

[not-world-trigger]

Kazama: I don’t have anger issues!

Suwa: A worker fucked up your order at McDonald’s and you screamed “ You done mcfucked up now! “

Suwa; And then you called him a chicken mcnobody.

Kazama: Ha, chicken mcnobody.

[incorrect-doctorwho]

[incorrect-miss-fisher]

Phryne: *unbuttoning shirt* Phryne: It’s really hot in here. Jack: Yes, I know, but why are you unbuttoning *my* shirt?

[incorrect-natshig]

Natsuo: We all have our demons

Natsuo: *gestures to Tomura* this one's mine.  

[notfunnyislike]

Sixty: I’ve done nothing wrong.

Sixty: Except for all the atrocities.

Sixty: Besides that I’m innocent.

[roseofithaca]

Michael: Synonyms are weird. If I invite you to join me at my "cottage in the forest", it sounds all nice and cosy, but if I invite you to my "cabin in the woods", it sounds like I'm gonna murder you.

Jason: My favourite is "butt dial" versus "booty call".

Eleanor: Mine is "Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned."

Eleanor: Compared to "Sorry, Daddy, I've been bad." *winks at Michael*

Chidi: Hey! Good news! Language is cancelled!!

[incorrectmusicals]

Sarah: What is your talent?

Jack: I can draw really well.

Spot: I’m really athletic.

Katherine: I write really well.

Romeo: I’m fucking gorgeous.

Crutchie: I’m hilarious and likable.

Race: I can dance really well.

*They all look at Oscar.*

Oscar: I can breathe.