Okay so hi welcome to Four's Take on Spiral Jon! My ramble from Discord, shown for your benefit! Mainly for @willcraftapple11 who seemed intrigued but also you guys should check it out
Spiral Jon Spiral Jon Spiral JON:
Research Era? Jon is just doing his researching thing when he gets a file that apparently he specifically has been asked to research something entirely unknown
He does it, going through the file and locked in when he realises that this. This is his life. He's researching his old schools, his grandmother's home, old jobs, all of it
He knows that he's always been a paranoid person, but he's almost certain that there's someone watching him, messing with him
The Eye probably likes this paranoia of being watched, but The Spiral tastes that paranoia and is on it like a hunting dog with a scent, practically snatching Jon out from beneath The Eye's nose
He tries to brush it off, but he keeps getting these weird files about his life, and becomes more and more scared of who wants this information, who is fucking with him
He starts seeing things in the corner of his eye, peeking out from behind walls, hears things creeping around his empty flat, and he starts to spiral because what the fuck is going on
Then the 'memory problems' start. Things are moved to different places, or disappear for at least a week altogether before reappearing in the exact same place, entire swaths of work he thought to be done or on the to-do list in the opposite condition
He's a closed off person, but the very few people who he tells brush him off no matter how gently and sympathetically they do it
He feels entirely alone, isolated - maybe they're all in on it? Trying to make him think he was going insane? Maybe he really is going insane.
He hears them whispering about him as he tries to work, throwing out insults and poorly received pity, and they just don't get it. They don't get it and they could never understand how terrified and paranoid he is
He is terrified, of course he is utterly scared, but he also begins to grow almost resentful of them all, because they just don't understand how all-consuming his paranoia is
He can't sleep, can't eat, can't relax anywhere and he becomes just utterly desperate for it all to stop, to stop feeling like he's going to be killed or like he's quite literally going insane
The Spiral curls into his mind, making itself comfortable like a cat, and starts whispering its own little offers to him
Doesn't he want them to understand? To feel how he feels? It's not fair, why is he the one suffering like this while they can all just go about their days without wondering if everyone is out to get them
He really tries to resist it, honestly - he doesn't want anyone to feel like this! - but then one day he hears someone laughing at his fear and he can't take it anymore. He reaches the centre of his spiral and he snaps, and he dies.
The Spiral welcomes him with open arms, and suddenly there is no fear anymore, because he…well, to say he understands it all would be incorrect
He doesn't let The Spiral in and suddenly have all of the knowledge about it spread out in neat little boxes, but he… understands what it all means now. Everything is meaningless and lies and truth are relative and nothing can hurt him in this space between
He loves The Spiral, and it becomes simple to reach into someone's mind, twisting their thoughts into that paranoid spiral he once struggled with
It's hard to get past that guilt at first, but of course, it's hard to feel truly guilty when he doesn't feel like a human anymore, when he isn't a human anymore - he's a what now, and that is impossibly euphoric because 'what's don't have to feel guilty or remorse or anything they don't want to feel
He makes people paranoid as he once was and he can enjoy it, taking the role of that sympathetic but exasperated acquaintance that thinks they're making it all up when one of the assholes who laughed at him comes to him for support
He is no longer paranoid, but the beast who causes the paranoia, and that is exhilarating.
It was easy to twist his sudden disappearance from work into a mental break, one that led him into therapy and 'truly doing a lot better' as long as he has his emotional support animal with him
Elias Bouchard asks him to take on the role of Head Archivist and he declines, claiming that he 'is still recovering from his break'. However, he's more than happy to…help out as an assistant should it be needed
Sasha James becomes the Head Archivist and he can idly play with his co-workers without the pressure of The Eye trying to work out what he is. Right?
Anyway those are like vague thoughts I've had on the matter yes yes
