#spn 9.08

[mittensmorgul]

i rewatched 9.06 this morning and just cried. Cas wanted to live, even with the pain he felt as a human. I will forever be bitter he never got the chance to experience real human joy.

and the end of 9.08, where Sam is talking to Dean, feels especially horrifically apt:

SAM What if there is something wrong with me -- something...really wrong? DEAN You're just crapped out, man. You need some rest. SAM Oh, it's more than that. I mean, Vesta said I was practically dead inside. DEAN Oh, and she's in the circle of trust now? SAM Why would she lie? DEAN It's probably the trials, okay? Probably some sort of a, you know, aftereffect. It's not like you're bouncing back from the flu here. I mean, you were glowing with freaking trial juice. SAM I don't know. DEAN Well, what else would it be? SAM Why does it have to be something else? It's always something else. We're always scraping to find some other explanation when maybe it is... just me. DEAN Oh, come on, Sam. SAM I'm a mess, Dean. You know it. And sometimes, I feel like maybe I'm never gonna actually be all right. DEAN You will. All right, 'cause whatever it is, we'll figure it out. SAM Or this is... just the way I am.

And when Dean breaks and tries to tell him the truth, Gadreel interferes and stops him.

And hell doesn’t that feel like *us* right now, desperately looking for an explanation, wondering why everything feels so wrong.

[mittensmorgul]

was the order of season 9’s episodes rearranged or did i dream that

No, it was rearranged. 

9.06 was shot seventh, but aired sixth.

9.07 was shot fifth, but aired seventh. 

(I assume 9.05 was shot sixth, but aired fifth…)

So… based on that, I think the original order was supposed to be:

9.07 Bad Boys

9.05 Dog Dean Afternoon

9.06 Heaven Can’t Wait

I don’t know what the reason was for all this rearranging– could be logistical and the way they aired was always the order they were intended in. Like, they could only get a certain actor/location/etc. during a certain time frame and rearranged filming to accommodate that, for example. Or it could be that they decided to present this series of episodes in a different order for some other reason.

They’ve done this before, though. I mean, every time Jensen directs, they have filmed his episode first of the season, even though it aired as the third or fourth episode of those seasons. That was purely to give Jensen as director the free time to prepare before directing.

The other notable time I can remember off the top of my head that they’ve done this was back in s5, when 5.14 was originally supposed to air AFTER 5.15, but because of the 2010 Winter Olympics that year, that would’ve meant the Valentine’s day episode wouldn’t air until the last week of March, which was clearly not gonna work, so the episodes were just swapped out. Which… makes 5.15 feel weirdly out of place after 5.14…

I went looking for this post on my blog, but whoopsie had never reblogged it back in 2015 when lizbob originally wrote it, but…

https://elizabethrobertajones.tumblr.com/post/121373051158/i-keep-hearing-that-season-nines-episodes-were

There’s a link in there to the source of that info, as well as some thoughts on the changes. I hope that helps :)

[mittensmorgul]

9.08, Rock and a Hard Place.

My main takeaway from the actual hunt part of this episode is that Virginity Is A Bullshit Construct and Jody's the only one with a healthy mindset on that fact. :P

oh, and this:

TAMMY [approaching SAM] Her favorite? She has no idea what kind of girl Honor is. SAM You don't say. Uh, Tammy, right? The poet? TAMMY Mm-hmm. SAM Tammy, why -- why don't, um, why don't you tell me what kind of girl Honor is? [...] TAMMY Honor is going to hell.

I love that line... because heck what an on-the-nose name for a girl who broke her chastity vow, right?

I remember all the "they're using the wrong tools for the job" meta from this episode, because everyone's struggling to cope without actually effective tools, and a startling lack of information on what's actually attacking them. A woman needs light but instead uses a taser that puts a tiny amount of light out. They have no water in their prison cell, and resorts to drinking her own blood in desperation. Dean asks for a screwdriver to try to free them, and all they have to give him is scissors from the first aid kid. But hey, it works, and it's the first PRODUCTIVE use of a "wrong tool," even if Sam and Jody have already killed Vesta by the time he breaks free.

But Dean... when he realizes his phone has been taken, he tears into the lining of his jacket and actually produces a functioning "spare" phone. He's incredibly well prepared for anything... Meanwhile the other people in the cell are beginning to turn on each other-- the other man literally trying to choose who to sacrifice next:

NEIL Okay, look, whatever that fireball thing was, it's taking the weakest, and I am not gonna be next. So, the way I see it, her leg's busted anyway. [NEIL motions to HONOR.] We serve her up. It could buy us some time. HONOR Screw you, Neil. [DEAN shoves NEIL to the wall.] DEAN Busted leg? Try a sprained ankle, okay? Nobody's serving anybody up! NEIL We are under the gallows, all of us. Give it Honor. It might save the rest of our necks, unless you have a better plan. DEAN Maybe I do. Maybe we'll give him you. Oh, what, you don't like that idea? Then shut up!

Before dying, Vesta pointed out how messed up Sam was inside, which leads to a massive resurgence of what Dean knows is Sam's lifelong feeling of impurity, his struggle over his own identity, and his fears that he's not even really human anymore... which absolutely breaks Dean, because this is also the first time that Gadreel has taken over Sam specifically to prevent Dean from telling Sam the truth. Dean is just beginning to realize just how helpless he is, and how badly he may have fucked up agreeing to Gadreel's shady terms back in 9.01:

DEAN It's probably the trials, okay? Probably some sort of a, you know, aftereffect. It's not like you're bouncing back from the flu here. I mean, you were glowing with freaking trial juice. SAM I don't know. DEAN Well, what else would it be? SAM Why does it have to be something else? It's always something else. We're always scraping to find some other explanation when maybe it is... just me. DEAN Oh, come on, Sam. SAM I'm a mess, Dean. You know it. And sometimes, I feel like maybe I'm never gonna actually be all right. DEAN You will. All right, 'cause whatever it is, we'll figure it out. SAM Or this is... just the way I am. [DEAN closes his eyes in resignation. He shakes his head and goes to sit next to his brother.] DEAN I can't. I can't let you put this on yourself. Listen to me. It's not you, Sam. [SAM's eyes glow bright blue and EZEKIEL starts to speak.] EZEKIEL I wouldn't do that, Dean. DEAN He deserves to know. EZEKIEL Your brother is not ready. If he ejects me, he will not make it. DEAN Damn it, Zeke! How much longer we got to keep playing this? EZEKIEL Not much longer. I promise you that.

So even though he WANTS DESPERATELY to come clean to Sam, to put everything right again, he knows there's nothing he can do to stop Gadreel, as long as Gadreel has effective possession of Sam's body. He still has to work to keep the peace... Dean really is trapped between a rock and a hard place. He’s dug himself a hole so deep he knows there’s no climbing out, and he’s starting to look for a way to tunnel out of his situation sideways.

Which plan, as we all know, will also go to hell...

[mittensmorgul]

Speaking of when Sam has sex, when did he have sex before Baby? Cuz doesn't Dean say something like "well at least you're finally not a virgin now" and I always thought he was just being a shit, but now I'm wondering if he was referring to Sam finally having sex since 9.08, when they became born-again virgins.

Yeah, as far as we know, that’s exactly what Dean was referring to. In canon, I think Amelia (in 8.10) was the last person Sam slept with. Then he signed that virginity pledge in 9.08, and then Piper in 11.04 is the next.

(and in addition to that, I think Amelia was the only person Sam was with after getting his soul back in 6.11, not counting his soulless year >.>) LET SAM HAVE A HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP 2kFOREVER.

I mean, he met Eileen just a few episodes later, in 11.11, and when we see her again in 12.17, it’s clear that she and Sam have been carrying on a relationship that at least involves a lot of skyping, and she stayed with him in the bunker so it’s fair to at least assume there was a more romantic tilt to their relationship, but it’s never made explicit.

Now he’s got this very interesting connection to Rowena, where not only was she the vision that appeared to Sam in 10.19, where “she” came very close to doing the Werther Box’s job of nudging Sam to commit suicide, but we now now that in every version of Rowena’s death, it’s Sam who kills her. I know, that doesn’t sound like the basis for a “traditionally healthy relationship,” but hear me out...

“Rowena,” in quotes because it was actually a vision of her in Sam’s mind, nearly was the death of Sam, but instead “she” was a resource that did ultimately help him uncover the key to defeating the Werther Box. She was “destined” to kill him, but instead saved him. And Sam... to an immortal (essentially) witch, what if “killing her” is just another way of saying she chooses humanity for him? And sheds her immortality for him? I mean... that would fulfill the terms of the “destined death at Sam’s hands,” but for all the best reasons, you know? So yeah... I’ve got my eye on that whole situation. :P

[mittensmorgul]

9.08: JODY! Since this is the episode where she honestly really enters the world of hunting. Before she’d been dragged into it by her association with Bobby. In 7.12 she became a reluctant participant in a hunt she steered Sam and Dean toward, but this is the first time the world of what’s really out there began to open up for her and she became an active participant for the entirety of a hunt.

DEAN Jody, are you sure you're, uh, to jump back in the fray? JODY This wackadoo stuff keeps coming. More I know, better armed I'll be. SAM Okay, so, we have, uh, missing church folk and super strength. Maybe angels harvesting vessels? Could be a Buddy Boyle type thing. JODY Wh-- angels? You're joking. DEAN Don't get your pants on fire. They suck.

I honestly love her reactions to learning about the supernatural.

Meanwhile Dean is coming to the end of his rope with what he’s willing to do to keep “Zeke’s” conditions for healing Sam... 

Dean: I can't. I can't let you put this on yourself. Listen to me. It's not you, Sam. Ezekiel: I wouldn't do that, Dean. Dean: He deserves to know. Ezekiel: Your brother is not ready. If he ejects me, he will not make it. Dean: Damn it, Zeke! How much longer we got to keep playing this? Ezekiel: Not much longer. I promise you that.

In an episode that deals with the consequences of broken promises...

[mittensmorgul]

Hello there! I'm a huge fan or your metas and I was wondering if you had an opinion about the fact that Dean doesn't seem to fool around much with women since purgatory (and the time he was a demon if i'm not mistaken?). Have a good day! :)

Hey there, and sorry. This is actually THE LAST topic I want to open up to discussion, because it invariably leads to the back and forth sort of wank that I just have zero desire to deal with. Already I’ve got other anons who are never gonna get an answer on this subject, because I am DONE talking about it publicly.

But yeah, really, Dean really hasn’t fooled around as much in recent seasons, and the times he HAS have seemed to have left him feeling hollow, you know? It hasn’t been played for laughs, but has deliberately shown as Dean “going through the motions.”

I mean...

11.04: Mistakes were made (and we don’t even know if anything sexual happened, and a lot of the meta theories doubt that anything sexual did happen)

11.13: the whole hickey scene (did that really look like a dude who was feeling good about his life choices?)

And going back even further, not counting the Demon Dean stuff, because hello, he was a demon, who canonically COULDN’T FEEL HUMAN EMOTIONS:

9.08 was his last even ~somewhat~ good-feeling sexual encounter with a woman, and he was bouncing back from his emotionally painful reunion with his FIRST EVER GIRLFRIEND and all the baggage associated with her, and was ENACTING A FANTASY that he even admitted in that episode that he was struggling with:

But, uh... Sometimes, it just makes you feel bad, you know? You're drunk. You shack up. Then, it's the whole morning thing. You know, 'Hey, that was fun.' And then, 'adios,' you know? Always the 'adios.'

It was a really painful glimpse behind the Performing Dean mask. Combined with living out a fantasy literally imported directly from a porno, he’s begun admitting it’s affecting him deeper than he usually lets on.

So no, I don’t think they’re going to tear down all this character growth for a laugh. If something sexual does happen with anyone, I think it’s going to show us more of this ^^ peeling back the layers of Dean’s carefully constructed mask. And it’s gonna be owie.

And this is officially THE LAST message I’m gonna answer on this subject until after the episode airs. If anyone wants to discuss it further, message me off anon so I can reply privately. I’m trying to keep my blog as wank-free as possible, and I’m really having a hard time with that today for some reason.

[nancylou444]

[nancylou444]