#spnjournal

[iregretallmychoices]

castiel is actually the most relatable character ever because he saw dean winchester cry one time and decided to move worlds for the guy

[iregretallmychoices]

sam winchester is hilarious because he's like. six foot ten. face that scares demons shitless. hand doesn't shake when he points a gun at you. threatens anyone he needs to in order to get what he wants (usually his brother's safety). intelligent beyond comprehension. could probably fight anything from god herself to the concept of politics to global warming and win if he put his mind to it. but he's also his big brother's entire world and he fucking knows it. so he also grabs dean's coat. whines to get what he wants. makes bitchfaces and participates in prank wars and teases like there's no tomorrow. lets dean step in between him and the danger because standing behind dean doesn't mean he's any less a shield for his brother it just means his brother is a little calmer. he's like one of those giant-ass dogs who could probably kill you with little more than a single bark, yet knows they're the center of their owner's universe and refuses to let that go to waste. you'd better BET they're milking that for all its worth

[iregretallmychoices]

this show is fucking ridiculous because you start a christmas episode in which pagan gods dress up as evil santa and beat people up before dragging them up the chimney like some shitty dream you have during the holidays and you're expecting it to be nothing more than mildly entertaining bullshit but then the next second you're crying your eyes out at dean giving his childhood to sam and the contrast between dean making christmas for sam and sam making christmas for dean because it might be the last time they can

[iregretallmychoices]

[iregretallmychoices]

Sam says “we just want to kill the demon. You used to want that too! Hell, you’re the one that came and got me at school! Youre the one that dragged me back into this!” and that is where he fundamentally misunderstands Dean. Because Dean didn’t drag him out of school to kill the demon, he dragged him out of school to find their Dad. He’s not on a quest for revenge, he’s on a quest for family.

[iregretallmychoices]

Seasons one and two are just

sam, constantly: 🙁☹️😣 you’re scared of me Dean: *through the pillow he’s been screaming into* for. FOR, Sammy, FOR. Repeat after me. I’m scared FOR you Sam: 😣☹️☹️ scared of me Dean: *continues screaming*

[iregretallmychoices]

i swear sam mainly points out dean's avoidance of emotion (always displayed clearly and easy to see) to misdirect from his OWN avoidance of emotion (much harder to see)

[iregretallmychoices]

do y'all think that, at one of his many high schools, dean shocked one of his teachers because he's the bad boy, the one who calls teachers "sweetheart", and doesn't make friends with anyone, but he signed up for Home Ec? and he's absolutely shit at it. his skills are limited to boxed pasta and dolling up microwave dinners, but he's determined? he shows up to every class, something no other teacher can say for his attendance in their class, and he doesn't snark once? he's focused in a way he isn't in any other class, asking questions, stuff about nutrition and what foods are good for little kids, and that teacher is so confused. it's like a switch is flipped. dean is their best student, he pays more attention than any girl in that primarily-girls class, and he leaves with the most improvement. and the teacher doesn't realize WHY until they see Dean leaving one day, arm over the shoulder of a boy from the middle school. and they think---there's more to that boy than he will ever let anyone know.