Hello and welcome to my TEDTalk, once again about Naomi Novikās Spinning Silver, about how Stepon is Autistic. I have textual evidence to support this claim, as well as a peer diagnosis from the Group Chat:
In Steponās first POV in chapter 11, the first two paragraphs (page 156, US hardback edition):
āI like goats because I know what they will do. If I leave the pen open, or there is a loose post, they will get out and run awayā¦I can understand goats. I tried to understand Da, because I thought if I did, hew would hit me less, but I didnāt ever manage it, and for a long time I didnāt understand Wanda, because she was always telling me to go away, but she would make me food along with everyone else and give me clothing sometimes. Sergey was kind to me most of the time, but sometimes he wasnāt, and I didnāt know why about that, either.ā
He doesnāt get social stuff! He gets the animals more than people because animals are predictable and make sense to him. His Da is always angry and abusive and nothing changes that. Wanda resents having to take care of him and resents loving him but does anyway and he doesnāt get it. Sergey is nicer but not always and tells Stepon the truth about their Mama but Stepon doesnāt get why sometimes Sergey is short tempered with him. He gets why the goats do what they do. There isnāt a question there, no difficult waters to navigate.
In Steponās chapter 13 POV (page 205, US hardback edition):
āSomeone else had lived in the house also, I remembered Wanda talking about them, but I couldnāt remember their name. It made me feel strange trying to remember when the name didnāt come, because names always came when I wanted them to. [ā¦] If I found them then I could just have asked what their name was and I would stop feeling strange.ā
My boy Stepon never forgets a name! He knows the names of everyone heās ever met or heard of and itās weird and bothers him when he canāt.
Also chapter 13, (page 205-206):
āIt was the day after market day in the fourth week of the month, so that meant Wanda was going to collect from the two villages down the cart-track going southeast from town and the names to collect from were Rybernik, Hurol, Gnadys, Provna, Tsumil, and Dvuri. I said the names over to myself on the way because they made a nice song in my head. When I got there I knocked on all the doors I saw and asked their name and if they said one of those names then I held out the basketā¦Then I brought the basket to Panova Mandelstam and told her, āI am not too younger after all.ā She looked in the basket and then she was very upset. I didnāt know why, but then Panov Mandelstam put his hand on my shoulder very gently and said, āStepon we should have explained. It is very important not to make any mistakes when collecting, and to keep a careful account. Do you think if you try very hard you can remember and tell us exactly where you went, and who gave you each thing?ā āYes,ā I said. āThis is the day of the month Wanda goes to Rybernik, Hurol, Gnadys, Provna, Tsumil, and Dvuri,ā and then I pointed to each thing and told him who gave it to me. I thought Panova Mandelstam was still unhappy afterwards, but she gave me some dumplings with a thick sauce with carrots and potatoes and real chicken meat in it, and a cup of tea with two big spoons of honey, so I must have been wrong.ā
The MEMORY on this kid!! He knows his sisterās schedule by heart and knows whatās okay to accept for payment! He makes little songs out of what he needs to remember! Again heās not sure how to understand the emotions of the people around him, misinterpreting Panova Mandelstamās upset at him going out to work for them and putting himself in harmās way as being upset with him for maybe messing up the accounts.
Steponās chapter 14 POV (page 231, US hardback edition):
ā..One of them yelled āHow does it feel to have killed your own father?ā
They ran away into the trees and didnāt wait for an answer but I thought about it the rest of the way. I wasnāt sure if I had killed my father, because I had only wanted him to not hit Wanda with the poker; I hadnāt wanted him to fall over me. But he had fallen over me and that was part of why he was dead, so maybe it didnāt matter that I hadnāt wanted it. I didnāt know.
I did know that it felt good ot be living with Panov and Panova Mandelstam. I had stopped feeling hungry even a little bit. But anytime I thought about Sergey and Wanda, even if I was sitting at the table, I felt like I had swallowed stones instead of food.ā
Iāve decided to leave out the rest of Steponās thoughts about what would be better, if Sergey and Wanda were with him and the Mandelstams or not for the sake of space, but it continues to prove the point I want to make. Heās analytical! This isnāt a kid who can lie to himself even for the sake of comfort. He could give himself the scant distance from his fatherās death that āI didnāt want him to dieā could buy him, but he knows he canāt. He was there, his father tripped over him, and his brother and sister are gone now. He doesnāt know if he will see them again, and this is still likely the best outcome because he isnāt hungry and frightened and cold anymore. But he still wants his brother and sister and would rather be cold and alone in the woods looking for them than ālive with the stones in [his] stomach.ā
Continuing Chapter 14, this time page 232-233:
ā..but he said it too kindly, the way you say nice things to a goat when you are trying to get it to come so you can tie it up. It didĀ not mean he wanted to hurt me. He only wanted to keep me in a good safe warm place so I wouldnāt die in the snow somewhere. But if I stayed in this place, I would never see Wanda and Sergey againā¦ āSergey and Wanda were going to go to Vysnia. They wanted to ask someone for work.ā I had to think about it because he was someoneās grandfather, and I didnāt know who the someone was, which was strange. But I did know the grandfatherās name. āPanov Moshel.ā
This time I had to cut it off because if I include Panova Mandelstam realizing Miryem is gone Iāll make this post about that instead. But! Stepon is coming in again with his goat analogies, which I love. Heās picked up some great ways to tell how people are feeling but heās steadfast, and again with his excellent memory. He canāt remember Miryem right now, but he can remember he grandfatherās name, even though he overheard that when Wanda and Sergey were just talking as he collected the nut from their Mamaās tree. He still remembers!
Steponās POV in chapter 15 (page 254):
āAre you warm enough Stepon?ā Panova Mandelstam asked me. I said I was because however warm I was, that had to be warm enough, because there was nothing to do about it if I wasnāt.ā
This is short but I really like the directness he has here. He is cold, as he says in the next couple of lines. But Stepon knows that nothing is capable of making him warmer, even in the best place in the sleigh, so he says heās warm enough.
Again in chapter 15 (page 256):
āThen he straightened and looked at Algis. Algis was standing next to the back of the sleigh. His head was hanging. He said, āI didnāt fill the bucket.ā He meant the grain bucket. So there was no food for the horses.
Panov Mandelstam didnāt say anything for a minute. The silence felt very long. Finally he said, āIt is lucky this is a late snow. There will still be some fresh growth under. We must dig and get them some grass and whatever else we can find for them to eat.ā
He was still kind, but I thought that he had not felt kind, and that was why he had been quiet. I thought that meant he must be very worried. So then I was very worried.ā
Analytical! As always! Stepon is learning how to distinguish emotions, and heās getting his queues from those around him. He knows that itās bad for the horses to not have food, but heās not worried until he realizes that Panov Mandelstam is. Stepon also spends the rest of the chapter making sure to remember how no one else would have forgotten the grain bucket. I donāt think that actually plays into him being autistic, but itās very funny to me. Wanda would have remembered to fill the grain bucket, Algis.
I donāt have any examples that jump out to me from Chapter 16, but I want to note that I love how aware Stepon is of how other people are feeling. Does he understand why? Not always. But he knows Wanda is scared when she realizes the mattress cover is big enough.
Steponās POV in chapter 19 (pages 334-335):
āWanda and Sergey went downstairs to help with the wedding. āWill you come, Stepon?ā Sergey asked me, but I shivered, remembering all those people crammed together, in the rooms and inĀ the streets, more people than I knew there to be in the whole world. āNo, no no,ā and they didnāt make me, but they went, and after a while the sun started to go down, and I started to not like being alone in the roomā¦I pulled my head back inside, but the house was getting so loud and full of people that I heard some of that same noise even when I closed the window. It came up through the fireplace and under the door. It got louder and louder and then music started playing. It was loud music, and people were dancing to it. I felt it in my feet not just in my ears. I sat on the bed and covered me ears and I stillĀ felt it coming up all the way through the house. It kept going on and on. It was all the way dark outside and I was really afraid now because why would Wanda and Sergey stay down in all that noise unless something bad made them. I had my face pressed up against my knees and my arms over my head, and then there was a knock on the door. I didnāt say to come in because I would have had to take my arms from over my head, but Panova Mandelstam came inside anyway. āStepon, are you all right?ā she said. She meant it but she didnāt really mean it, I could tell. She was thinking about something else. But when I didnāt say anything back and didnāt pick my head up, she started to really mean it, and then she went and got the candle she had left on the table for us and she took out a couple of big lumps of wac from it and blew on them until they werenāt hot, and she said, āHere, Stepon, put the wax in your ears.ā
I thought I would try. I took my hand away for just a little bit and took the wax. It was still warm and soft. I pushed it inot my ears and it squished into the little spots and then it stopped being so warm and the noise stopped being so loud on that side. I could still feel it in my body but I couldnāt feel it so much. So then I was very glad and I took the other lump of wax and that helped too.ā
Sensory overload my beloathed. Stepon, buddy, you are me and I am you. Why WOULD they be around all of those people and all of that noise? My boy would have LOVED noise cancelling headphones if they existed in this world. This scene really resonated with me the first time I read Spinning Silver, to the point that I had to read it twice. I have been here before except no one gave me anything to dull the noise.
Steponās POV chapter 21 (page 393-394):
āI did not mind taking them off because it was warm, and I was sitting in a cart anyway. I was glad to be leaving that terrible city. It was even worse than before. The streets were all crowded with people everywhere because now there was no snow and they wanted to be outside and they all wanted to talk at the same time and make noise. I lay down in the bottom of the cart next to the sacks that were pretending to be Miryem and I tried to pretend to be a sack myself, but I wasnāt a sackā¦Panov Mandelstam got down to pay the man at the gate some money, because that city was such a terrible place we had to pay to be let out.ā
He hates this place! He wants his quiet little house back, thank you and goodbye. Heād prefer to have his whole family with him, but any leaving back to his safe, quiet place is best. This city is too crowded and too noisy and his life would be easier if he was a sack that couldnāt hear but heās not so heās just gonna lay there.
Thatās the end of his POV chapters and I donāt wanna use evidence from any of the other characters POVās because that can very too much and also Iām not currently rereading it was easiest to just go back to passages Iād already marked because Iāve been thinking of this for a while. Anyway! Stepon is autistic, thank you for reading my roughly 2400 words so far, I will not be taking challenges to this. Seriously if you try being mean about this Iām gonna block you.
