As a person who spends a lot of time lying down and rarely does any kind of activities, I come off as someone who's taking a lot of 'me' time, or a lot of 'resting' time. However I have to assert that any time I spend recovering from an activity is not 'me time' or 'resting time', it's the time that is stolen from me. I can't do anything with this time. I am in pain, I can't move, my activities are limited to 'hopelessly distracting myself so that I do not experience the full horror of what's going on in my body right now'. I don't even get to have 'me time' because of how much of the time is stolen from me.
Thanks for the tag @erathene. Since I'm trying to work on Stolen Time, I figured I'd share what I've LITERALLY just written, where Ashlynn is dealing with the "Mean Girls" of the court (who are all nameless lmao) and getting pressured into putting on a performance.
“Surely even a carpenters daughter can manage a simple little ditty?” the one in the middle pressed with a smile too sharp to be friendly. “Or are the ladies of your world not educated in music?”
Inhaling so deeply her kirtle bodice creaked, Ashlynn barely managed to keep the irritation and anger from blooming in her chest. The urge to correct, to call out, to get incredibly fucking bitchy, was strong. But this trio of Ladies were members of Caspian’s court, and she was merely a guest. To lash out would reflect badly on herself, and certainly put Caspian in an uncomfortable position.
So instead, Ashlynn forced a smile to her face, aware that it didn’t reach her eyes.
“I can play something for y—”
“Oh!” The faun on the left exclaimed in what seemed to be almost genuine delight, clapping her hands excitedly. “You’ll play for the court?”
The court?
“Of course she will,” the middle woman once again spoke up, leaving Ashlynn no chance to protest. “I’m sure everyone would be delighted to hear what music your world has, whether or not it’s any good remains to be seen…”
“Caspian enjoyed it.”
The retort slipped from Ashlynn’s lips before she could stop it.
Startled expressions, shared glances, a doubtful look which bordered on a glare.
“You’ve already played for his majesty?” the quieter girl asked.
“I did, he seemed to like the song, so yes I’ll play for the court, and then you can make up your own minds,” Ashlynn replied, allowing her voice to harden slightly in what she hoped was a confident manner. “Now, leave me be a moment so I can better familiarise myself with this instrument.”
*promptly plays My Heart Will Go On*
As always, no pressure tags go tooo @hobbitwrangler @esta-elavaris and @ravnarieldurin
Deep down I went down, Lord I tried, tried to follow your light but it's nighttime. There's darkness in the distance from the way I've been living, but I know I can't resist it.
-this was written by a man who broke my heart, made me believe I was the one, ripped me apart by saying he never loved me, and now he blames me for whatever is wrong in his life. the initials are r.e., and this is the only beautiful thing he ever written, more than adequate to steal it. at least i'm giving credits.
Stolen Time - A Thomas Raggi Story || Chapter Nine
Pairings: Thomas Raggi x Fem! Reader
Description: Thomas had one big love in his life and it all went to hell for a reason that he could never understand. Almost a decade later, the truth starts to unfold as he learns what really happened.
Warnings: it's angsty. Mentions of emotional abuse and neglect.
A/N: Well, thank you for all the love you've given to this story and for the patience you've had waiting for it. I hope you enjoy.
Words: 2.1k
THE STOLEN TIME MASTERLIST
THE MAIN MASTERLIST
kofi || join the taglist || send a request || chaoticallie
Minutes turned into hours, hours into days, days into weeks and weeks into months.
Life was starting to feel a lot better for all of them as they settled into their new reality.
Theo was doing well in school, living between their two homes - spending whatever time they could with Thomas and living the rest of the time with Angie.
Angie was somehow managing to balance her academic life, working on her art and raising Theo, while also figuring out how to be Vic’s girlfriend and a normal human being.
Thomas - he was living his best life being Theo’s dad. The two spent a lot of quality time - going to cooking classes together, Thomas teaching Theo how to play the guitar, the two going for walks and often bringing you flowers at the cemetery too. They were there for each other and healed slowly as time moved on. Not that your loss was something any of them would ever fully heal from, but the pain lessened as time moved on.
“Dad, do you think this would have been possible if mum was still here?” Theo asked Thomas one gloomy December morning. It was raining outside and the two had set the day aside to decorate for the upcoming holidays.
“What?” Their question surprised him and he wanted to be sure that he understood them correctly before answering.
“Do you think we could have been a family if she was still here?” Theo rephrased the question.
“I think that a lot of time was stolen from us. A lot of opportunities to be a family and I don’t know what could have been but I know that I wouldn’t have left you or her behind.”
Thomas went to hug Theo. He knew that the holidays might not be particularly easy on them and he was expecting questions to arise and yet, he still worried if all that he was trying to do would be enough for Theo to feel the joy of the holiday season that any child should feel.
Theo held Thomas as tight as they could.
“I don’t want to lose you.”
“I’m not going anywhere, Theo.” He reassured them.
**
“How are we going to get the star on top of this tree?” Vic looked at the tall tree and then at her girlfriend.
“Thomas will help.” Angie chuckled.
“Don’t you have a ladder?”
“I do but we should wait either way, Theo should be the one putting it on the top.”
“True.” Vic agreed.
“I still haven’t told her that I need to go to the States for a few days.” Angie confessed. She’d gotten a call from her parents and she had to show up because otherwise they would be back and none of it would go well.
“I am worried about you going there alone.” Vic squeezed her hand.
“It will be fine.”
“What if it isn’t? What if we lose you?”
“You will not lose me.” Angie hugged Vic and kissed her very gently.
“Angie..”
“I didn’t get this far to only get this far. I’ll go, see them for a few days and be back in time for Christmas. It will be fine.”
“Are you sure that I can’t come along? I don’t want to meet them because I have nothing nice to say to them but I still want to be there for you.”
“It will be okay, Vic. I’ll be back before you know it.” Angie promised.
“You better come back to me.” Vic kissed her again.
**
The rain finally stopped but there was still fog enveloping the city and making everything slow down. Theo was done studying for the day and there was still time before Thomas and Theo were due to meet Vic and Angie.
“Will you stay here today?” Thomas asked Theo.
“Yes, Angie is busy with Vic and I am happy to be here with you.”
“I’m happy to be with you too.” He smiled at his child.
“We could go buy presents later. I need to find something for nonna and nonno.” Theo added.
“I do too and of course, we can do that. We can also grab a bite before we go to Angie.”
“Angie might kill us if we go full.”
“Vic is cooking.”
Theo chuckled. “Vic’s cooking is not that bad.”
“I don’t want to spend the holidays in the bathroom.” Thomas insisted, making Theo laugh even harder.
**
“Promise me you’ll tell Theo.” Vic insisted, leaning against the kitchen counter. They had put cosy fireplace ASMR on the TV and they were setting up everything for when Theo and Thomas would arrive. The plan was for the four of them to have a meal together and then decorate the apartment for the holidays.
“I’m scared.” Angie admitted.
“You can’t just vanish from their life.”
“I am not vanishing, I am going over to see my parents and then I’ll be back before any of you know it.”
“Yes, but you know that it will make Theo anxious. You shouldn’t keep it from her.”
“I will tell her.”
Right on cue, Thomas and Theo arrived, bringing flowers for Angie and sweet and salty pastries for dessert.
“You are not full, are you?” Vic looked at both Theo and Thomas, who with each passing day more and more resembled each other.
“No, we had a coffee and a hot chocolate, and we shared a pastry." Thomas raised his arms defensively.
"It was necessary!" Theo insisted. "We did some shopping and just needed a treat…"
"And it has nothing to do with Vic's cooking."
“I heard that.” Victoria said, making the others laugh.
“Thom, can I talk to you for a few minutes?” Angie pulled him to the side when they all went to the kitchen.
Vic looked at Angie, concern showing on her face but she knew that Angie would at least tell Thomas about her upcoming trip. Vic and Thomas would take care of Theo but the worry was still there.
“What’s up?” The two went to the balcony and Thomas lit a cigarette. He was smoking significantly less since Theo had entered his life but it was still a habit he couldn’t kick.
“I am going to America for a few days.” Angie decided not to beat around the bush.
He almost dropped his cigarette.
“Why? What happened? Do you need security? Backup? Theo doesn’t have to go, right?”
“I haven’t told Theo yet. And no, my parents are fine with me not bringing them but I am still conflicted on whether or not I should tell Theo where I’m going.”
“Theo will want to know, you can’t lie to them.” Thomas insisted.
“I will take to the papers about Theo’s status.”
Thomas and his lawyer, with Angie’s help, had been drafting papers - adoption ones, so that Thomas would be able to recognize Theo as his own. It was the peaceful route of adoption and Thomas had passed with flying colours all the checks that institutions required. Now it was for the guardians to sign away the rights. Hopefully outside of court.
“Don’t put yourself in unnecessary danger, Angie.”
“I am not but the sooner you have adopted Theo and it’s all behind us, the better.” Angie insisted.
Thomas considered his friend’s words.
“Do you want me to come with you?”
“No. I want Theo to be here with you and if you are here and then they will be safe.”
“You know Vic will lose her shit if something happens to you, right?”
“I know. But you will take care of my loved ones for me, won’t you?”
“Always. But you are very loved too, Angie. Don’t forget that.”
Vic and Theo were sitting at the kitchen table, waiting for the adults to walk back in the room. Victoria couldn’t wrap her mind around how much had changed in just a few months but it wasn’t something that she would give up easily.
“Did something bad happen?” Theo almost whispered. They could see the tension in Thomas’ body and they had noticed Angie’s behaviour too.
“No, why do you ask that?” Vic ran a hand through Theo’s hair.
“Angie is acting off. And papa became all tense. I can see them talking.”
“It’s all okay, Theo. You are safe and you don’t need to worry about anything at all.Let the adults take care of you.”
“Does it have to do with my grandparents?” Theo looked at Vic. The bass player didn’t know what to say.
“They are talking about something.” Vic tried to dodge the question.
“Are they coming over for Christmas?” Theo still had nightmares about their grandparents’ meanness. It was brutality that was not visible to the public, brutality kept behind closed doors but one that was so ugly that they couldn’t get it out of their head easily.
“Theo, we are going to have the best Christmas, I can promise you that.” Vic squeezed Theo’s hand.
“How can you know?” Tears rushed to Theo’s eyes, thinking about what the past year had been for them, the loss of you, Thomas appearing in their life and everything that had changed.
“Because we are here and we will be together.” Vic reassured calmly.
Theo went to hug Vic.
Angie and Thomas re-entered the kitchen and saw Vic and Theo all snuggled up.
“Don’t you look cosy?” Thomas smiled. His smile disappeared when he saw that Theo had cried.
“What’s happening?” Theo went to stand between Angie and Thomas.
“I need to fly to America before the holidays.” Angie explained.
“Why? Papa said that a lawyer can give them papers.” Theo insisted. Thomas hated that they were growing up so early and he hoped that this would eventually slow down. He wanted to give Theo the best childhood.
“My parents said they want to see me. I will go and fulfil that desire so they don’t show up knocking on our door.”
“Will you be safe?”
“As safe as I can be.” Angie promised. A promise that didn’t sit well with neither Thomas, nor Theo or Vic.
“When will you be back?”
“I am not going to miss Christmas with my baby, I promise.”
You make a lot of promises, Angie. Vic thought to herself. She shared a glance with Thomas, whose hope was that Theo wouldn’t be broken again.
**
“I will call you when I land and we can text whenever.” Angie reassured Theo.
“You don’t have to go.” Theo insisted.
“You don’t have to go alone.” Vic added.
“It will be fine, I will be back before you know it.” Angie said again.
“I will take care of the girls, don’t worry.” Thomas was the calmest of them even though inside he was frustrated and worried, but tried to keep appearances for Theo’s sake.
“Thank you.”
“Just come back quickly.” Theo begged.
“And be safe.” Vic added.
“I love you.” Angie kissed Vic gently before hugging Thomas and Theo and going inside the airport, determined that this wouldn’t be the last time she saw her family.
Theo was silent the whole ride to Thomas’ apartment.
“Theo, do you want to watch a film when we go to the apartment?” Vic offered.
“I think I’ll go to sleep.” Theo replied quietly.
“We can go out for dinner later.” Thomas added.
“We’ll see.”
Angie got on the plane and settled in her place, her mind racing with everything that yet had to happen and the fear that haunted her. A normal person would scoff and say that those were just her parents, they wouldn’t do anything to her, they wouldn’t do anything to Theo either.
But they were the ones that had kept you and Theo apart. They are the ones who sent you away time and again, ripping you away from everything and everyone you knew just because of the supposed shame that would always follow them because you had chosen Theo over appearances time and again.
Angie could never forgive them for the stolen times, for the time they had taken from you and your family. She could never forgive them for how they treated you and for how they treated Theo. She could never forgive the years of abuse, neglect, and exile. You never deserved that and neither did Theo.
“I’ll make sure they get what they deserve.” She played with the bracelet that you had given her the previous year.
The hours couldn’t go by quickly enough. She wanted to put it all in the past.
It was time for her to live. To heal. To move on.
She dragged the small packed suitcase with her when she got off the plane and saw a tall man holding a sign for her.
“They’ve been expecting you, Angela.” The driver said when she approached him.
AUGUSTIN MAURS - Untitled scores from the series Stolen Time / Tempo rubato (2013). Ink and pencil on paper. Five pieces. Each 42 x 55,6 cm
Text from the concert-exhibition “Found Melodies and Stains” (artgeneva 2013): The Stain usually stands for the undesirable. It is the stigmata, it reveals a mistake. Beyond this unfounded existence, it can sometimes be confused with the Sign – as it is the case, for instance, in the musical notation, where the note is indicated with a single dot. Augustin Maurs’s work plays on the limit between the definite meaning of the sign and the arbitrary appearance of the stain. The “Found Melodies” preserve the flaws of memory, the accidental traces and the indifference of time. The scores are interpreted by the musicians of the Ensemble Matka who resides in the Villa Sarasin during artgenève on this occasion.
