#swinessy

[masquerade-of-misery]

This wonderful gift from my beloved mootie, @groovifiedcandy , has just made my day!! I can't thank you enough😭😭💚💚

[make-peace-w-ur-god]

@masquerade-of-misery

>:)

Woe, clingy swing be upon ye!

[masquerade-of-misery]

Not sure how many of you read my more personal posts or my self-loathing thoughts in the tags when I reblog certain posts.

But... the older I get, the worse it becomes. (My self-hatred, especially regarding my looks.)

It affects my self-shipping as well.

Part of me thinks that there's a chance that Swing (or Lilia) would fall in love with me, simply because of my understanding, compassionate, and caring nature. Because I wouldn't judge or lecture him, wouldn't expect him to follow human morals and nonsensical societal rules, etc. I would accept and love him for who he is. Wholeheartedly and unconditionally.

But then, the voice comes. The one that whispers, "He wouldn't spare you a glance. Who would desire such a disgusting woman? Can you even call yourself that? Looking like a stupid high school girl at 35, flat in the front, flat in the back, thin as a stick, no curves, nothing for a man to grab. With your oversized, discoloured, crooked teeth and overbite, with your stupid laugh lines, with your desert-dry skin and chipped lips. With that big, bony, ugly ass nose. And that annoying, childish, high-pitched voice. Who'd want to listen to it on a daily basis?" It also tells me that I'm most probably too boring for him.

So, if I confessed to him, instead of this:

He'd react like this:

Let me tell you, I'd throw myself off the Spiral Hill right away.

[masquerade-of-misery]

"Let me present to you my beautiful wife😌"

[masquerade-of-misery]

I just... want to hold Swing like this.

If he was in a bad mood and wanted to vent, I'd be there for him to listen.

If he was too tired or upset to speak, I'd embrace him in silence until he was ready to talk about his woes.

If he just simply wanted to cuddle and relax, I'd be more than happy to oblige.

I want to be his sanctuary.💚

[make-peace-w-ur-god]

Congrats on the big move, @masquerade-of-misery !

With joy comes misery though.

The joy: you have a new house! :D

The misery: this house warming gift from me.

Loss. Swinessy ver. (ft. A sneaky cameo of my persona)

[masquerade-of-misery]

Hi Nessy! 🥰💖💖💖

I was wondering- do you have a selfship playlist for Swing? 👀 I think about your playlist with Lilia fondly- the songs were both cool and romantic! You have great taste 💪 👀🐛(No pressure ofc)

Kallistooo!🤗💕💕🐦‍⬛🐦‍⬛

I'm so touched that you like the playlist I made for my selfship so much!

I've been meaning to make one for Swinessy, but life has been crazy busy😩 (I finally got my own apartment and moved in on Monday!)

But seeing your ask motivated me yesterday so much that I started collecting songs to the ones I already had in mind ^w^

Once it's complete and I post it, I'll make sure to tag you😊💖💖

[masquerade-of-misery]

Lilia and me doing grocery shopping:

Swing and me on our way to steal all the holidays: