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~Rules~
I need some ideas for rules lol I've got a few already but I need help figuring out some general system related rules.
Forgot to mention what rules we already had lol {1. Don't harass people. (You know who you are) 2. If there's an issue just block and move on. 3. Behave, especially around littles.}
Master post
📼Welcome to the blog dear traveler 📼
☽My name is Ash, but you may also call me:Ace or Zero
☽Please read the information below before interacting
Who all is avaliable:
Hello and Hey my mushroom geeks! My name is Sage/Zero and welcome to the blog! Please see list below alters you can interact with at this ti
Rules: https://haunted-system.tumblr.com/post/676719384137498624/rules-for-this-blog
📼Roleplay blog:https://cottage-full-of-bones.tumblr.com/
📼Asks:open
📼Art trades:Open
DNI:
📼Any harassment,false claiming, supposeble “name stealing”, calling alters ocs,misgendering, will NOT be tolerated on this blog. Please do not interact if you are one of the following blogs, or are friends with these blogs:
☽Yourdorkyskelly/Tales-of-two
☽Isn't-that-something
☽Saidebanks
☽manscaped
☽alycats
☽hatsunepiku2009
☽ai-physco
🔪asavvysage
📼We hope you enjoy your stay!
Picrew:https://picrew.me/image_maker/1519418/complete?cd=WhTsC0yxUa
If you have any questions about the DNI please feel free to ask ^^
Our rules as a system:
Don't do anything that can harm the system in common.
Especially when it comes to the littles.
It also contains the "no criminal activity" rule.
Don't fight with each other. Don't k*** each other. Don't r*** each other. In general, don't harm each other in any way.
Talk to each other when it's needed.
Tell if something is wrong.
Be careful, kind, and nice to each other as often as possible.
Monitor the mental & physical health.
That's it, I think.
👅 — the alter Doflamingo.
Rules
[tw: bad parents]
I didn’t learn this properly growing up, but luckily, books! There are 6 approaches to enforcing structure, and keeping them in mind has led to our best success as a team.
Rigidity treats the rule as more important than the child, and is enforced without regard to the child’s needs. It doesn’t believe children should have a say and comes with threats, like violence or the removal of affection. It leads to kids feeling oppressed, imperfect, scared, angry, and learning that rules are more important than their needs.
Criticism is about name calling, rather than setting clear standards for behavior. It uses words like “always” and “never” and can apply judgey labels in an effort to enforce behavior. Not helpful, and kids grow up feeling like they can’t ask for help, or that failure means they’re a bad person.
Non-negotiable rules tell children what to do to be safe and successful, are made for the child's well-fare, and are routinely enforced. They prove to children that you care about their safety and that they should too. These rules teach children to be obedient and that failure has consequences.
Negotiable rules are created with children, a process that teaches kids to argue, bargain, evaluate data, communicate politely, make decisions, and become increasingly responsible for themselves. They know and feel bought-in towards the intention of the rule. They feel respected, listened to, empowered... and on the way, maybe stumble. They learn and grow.
Marshmallow parents grant freedom without demanding responsibility in return. Parents let their kids get away with murder, giving into demands and teaching kids that they don’t need to grow up. It might look weirdly supportive, loving or trusting, but it undermines children's confidence and teaches them that there are no consequences.
Abandonment consists of few/no rules, and therefore failure to provide opportunities for children to safely learn age appropriate skills. It can also be the result of parents who are unavailable (physically or emotionally), criminals, bullies, or suffering from mental illness or substance disorders. Kids grow up believing that they’re not worth loving, that they’re not wanted, and that their needs aren’t important. Not. Cool.
Despite being written about children, the book makes it clear, these rules apply to people of all ages. You can use them setting boundaries, with your boss, with your partner and yep, even with your parts ;) We follow the books instructions and make sure our rules fall into the non-negotiable (safety based) and negotiable (learning based) buckets. Solid results in practice.
~Dee
Source: Growing Up Again
If you ask one of my alters not to talk to you when they're out, they will respect your boundaries and not talk to you when they're out. It's a rule of mine (Jay) that they are to be as polite to the outside world as they can. They can be a dick to each other all they want.
Hey there, ratpacksystem here, but it's not our main blog. Just wanted to say your feelings about system rules are so valid (not that you need me to tell you that) and I very much appreciate your post because you made me realize that I get the same vibe. And we DO have certain rules, but it's things that everyone has been able to more or less agree to because they have the same understanding of what our life looks like and goals are etc. I hate the idea of hosts just making rules for everyone.
Thanks. It was helpful for me to write all that down and sort out my own thoughts. We definitely have “rules” but they’re the kind of healthy and flexible boundaries that exist in healthy families. They’re a part of the re-parenting we’re doing now. The rules that we had when we were mimicking the rules we saw other system implementing were very similar to the rigid, harmful, dysfunctional family rules we’d grown up with.
Trading Systems And Methods: The Stock System Profit Alpha test
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There was a recent discussion about DID systems dating each other, and whether such a thing was appropriate or not. The linked discussion seems especially relevant and timely, as it demonstrates the problems that can occur in such situations.
There are good reasons for many of the common guidelines that you're likely to find in a DID system, such as:
Littles cannot drive
Littles cannot have sex
Alters cannot date
Alters cannot have sex with the host's partner
Only certain alters can use the credit card
Agreements regarding location/method/frequency of self-harm behaviors
This is not meant to be an exhaustive list. Not all systems will have all these rules (or, I suppose, any of them). Some systems might allow a free-for-all with no rules, but that sounds pretty chaotic to us.
Given the already complex nature of DID, and the inherently complex interactions in an intimate relationship, and the further complicated characteristics of a relationship involving a trauma survivor (let alone between 2 trauma survivors), it seems incredibly ill-advised for two DID systems to become so entwined. The opportunities for abuse, sabotage, and inflicting further trauma seem so incredibly high and so obvious that I'm not sure how this could ever work, long-term. I could be wrong, your mileage may vary.
It just seems like I'd have to go out of my way to date someone else with DID, and I'm not sure why anyone would make the extra effort for what's very likely to be an objectively less rewarding relationship.
