#tbh:

[aro-culture-is]

not really an "aro culture is" but more of a question to aro people

not feeling attracted to anyone like ever in my whole life, but still wanting to be in a relationship one day with kisses and other "romantic" gestures with someone i like even if i dont feel that romantic type of love, could that be being aromantic?

ive thought about girls and guys like this, and i already know im ace, and i have no previous bad experiences with relationships or influences in my life that could have made me "not want to date/not feel attracted/etc"

i think the only possible explanation is that i am aro but idk

that's 100% a microlabel under the aro-spec. the thing is, never being attracted to anyone? aro as fuck. wanting to date people regardless? welcome to the realm of the cupioromantic, partnering aros, and romance favorable aros - just like how ace people may want to, enjoy, and have sex, aro folks can want to, enjoy, and date others romantically.

you may also find it useful to research queerplatonic relationships, if you haven't, and see if that sounds like something you're interested in. I like to define it as relationships that queer the platonic; ie, it doesn't fit into standard definitions for romantic or platonic partnerships, and instead is a relationship defined by the folks in it with each other. very much a choose-your-own-adventure of committed relationships.

a further note: the idea that aromanticism or a lack of interest in relationships only comes from abuse, trauma, or "bad experiences" in relationships is a microaggression. in your case, likely internalized arophobia. this isn't to say it doesn't happen! caedromantic folks are extremely welcome here, whether they feel the change is temporary or permanent. instead this is to say that we are not "broken" alloromantics, as the unstated logic behind that implies. frankly, where a person's attraction or lack thereof comes from is something I have no interest in questioning. i am very, very concerned when folks pathologize queer identities.

[gabrielscabin]

aftercare for the bottom dysphoric subs who get attached to the strap

first i’m pulling them close, telling them how good they were for me, how perfectly they took it, how much i care about them. specific compliments—i loved how they reacted there, i’n proud of them for trying something new here, whatever i can think of. whole time, my hands stay well above the waist, not even acknowledging their dick.

as soon as we’re ready to get up i’m grabbing the biggest hoodie we own, shoving them into it before they can think too hard about anything. i’ve seen it in their eyes before, the empty crush of being dragged back to stupid dysphoric reality, and i’m not having it a second time.

pull them to the bathroom and tug them against my chest while i turn on the shower. tuck their face against my neck so there’s no risk of accidental eye contact with the mirror. feel them stroking their cock, not in a sensual way, just to self-soothe. maybe hear them sniffle a little and know it’s my cue not to let them get lost in their thoughts. rub their back and remind them what a good job they did, or just talk about random bullshit to fill the void.

when the water’s warm, we’ll get in together. i won’t make them do any of the work, just let them cling onto me as much as possible. i need it too, anyway, the skin-to-skin. when we get out, it’s a gentle toweling off and back into the hoodie, because harsh lights and cold tile are no place for this vulnerability. at least the mirror’s fogged over.

only once we’re safely back in bed do i bring it up. maybe they’re calm enough now to not mind. maybe they’re trying to be brave, but i can hear their breath tremble. maybe the hollow look comes back. maybe they cry. maybe they get angry—with themself, with me, with fate.

it’s stupid. it’s so stupid. it’s pathetic. it’s just—

but it’s not just anything. it’s your scene, your dick, your safe haven.

i’d still wait until they were ready. whatever they needed. if they want, if they let me, i take it off myself, let them lay down and bury their face in my stomach. it’s easier if someone else can shoulder the blame, if it’s less of a choice. so i ease the harness off gently, keep it nearby if they want or immediately toss it somewhere out of sight.

go back to holding them. let them cry or seethe through the comedown, the broken fantasy. be angry with them that we can’t just live here all the time. be kind of grateful anyway to have this, to tend to a hurt most people wouldn’t understand.

say. i got you. it doesn’t change a goddamn thing.

[telepathylove]

the way that celebrity men decide at some point like when they get old enough that they need to go from boyish to Manly and need to start bulking up to regain or reinforce their male identity bc boyish no longer flies past a certain age (subjective). one of the worst things , in the world ,

[thedeathofthelamb]

what's on my mind? oh not much, just how we talk about equality and liberation and rights like they’re fundamental values but we build our entire existence on the systematic domination of other beings whose suffering we’ve normalized to the point of invisibility and we teach ourselves not to feel it not to see it not to question it because to question it would unravel the entire hierarchy we depend on to justify our own superiority and so we compartmentalize morality so cleanly that we can protest injustice while eating the product of a throat slit without a flicker of contradiction and we call that progress and wonder why nothing changes but the truth is that as long as cruelty remains acceptable as long as the suffering of the voiceless is institutionalized and aestheticized and consumed for pleasure we will never dismantle the deeper systems of oppression because we’ve already agreed that domination is natural and power entitles you to use and discard and that logic bleeds everywhere into how we treat the earth how we treat each other how we treat ourselves and we keep trying to evolve from the middle of a wound we refuse to acknowledge

[felicitysmoakisaqueen]

I’ve just realized I’m kind of sabotaging my chances to get in a master next year…. everyone is applying for at least 5 or 10 to make sure at least one accepts them, and im only applying for two (that is if i actually send the 20pages file for one of them). I feel like I’m almost hoping I won’t be accepted so that I can breathe next year….. im a mess

[jollyempathpersonllama]

[doxflamingo-blog]

Ship meme: doffy + tesoro?

Send me a ship and I will grade it:        

Doflamingo x Tesoro:

A+: OTPA: I love itB: It’s really cuteC: Not a bad shipD: I’m neutral on itE: I don’t really like itF: NOTPN/A: I don’t know the ship well enough ???