"Shut up, Whitaker. You can take it. You'll be good and take it."
A little bump on Dennis's tummy where Robby's cock presses into his guts, making Dennis whine and Robby sneer. He's so much bigger, caging him in, grinding deeper just to make poor Dennis arch and writhe, hopelessly and helplessly filled.
"Dr— Dr Robby, please!"
"Fuck, kid, you like calling me that, don't you? Yeah? You like knowing it's your boss's dick fucking into your sopping fucking cunt? What a good little slut for me, baby, yeah, love the way you take it. Mm, but you don't have a choice, do you?"
Robby pushes his palm over Dennis's quivering stomach, increasing the pressure as he fucks in and out, hips slapping against Dennis's thighs as he takes the boy apart. Dennis is crying, tears dripping down his temples, broken, garbled moans choking out of his spit-slick lips. He can't fucking take it, but he doesn't have a choice, can't fight it, can't curl away.
"Cutest little moans I've ever heard, baby. Oh, choking my fucking dick, Jesus Christ. I could praise anything about you and you milk my fucking cock, huh? How about my good boy? Yeah? My good baby, my good, obedient puppy?"
"Mmngh—! haah, haah, haah— I— fuck—!"
Dennis wails as he cums, squirts, his body alight with white-hot pleasure that burns him from the inside out. It's heaven and hell, it's bliss. Too fucking much to take, but oh, it feels so good to be good for Dr Robby, any way that he can be. Robby just laughs, fucks him into that realm of gasped pleasure-pain, chasing his own high.
"Shit, yeah. Puppy likes that. Puppy reaaaally likes that. Oughta collar you right up, baby, keep you for myself. What's a puppy without an owner, huh?"
if I had been in the fandom when the jivorce was happening I would've gone to a con and kill myself in front of jensen and jared to change the trajectory of their lives
Ingo is pushing himself too hard and forgetting important responsibilities. Kana is not happy dealing with this.
I wrote this based off a combo of requests, one requesting an AU-specific situation where Ingo needs to hide Akari somewhere, and a general request for more interactions with Kana. And then I remember at the time I wrote this I had been dealing with a pretty awful sore throat and lost voice, so I cast that upon Ingo just to get some of my irritation with it out. It's cathartic writing about it so I can at least relieve it for other characters, haha.
OR read here on AO3!
AND check out the Phione Akari AU masterpost!
Enjoy!
————
The worn bench creaked quietly as Ingo sat down, leaning forward against the table with a sigh.
It felt good to sit down on an actual seat after another trek of five extensively rough days, devoted entirely to fruitlessly scouring the coastlands for Akari.
Well, in a sense. Her body was still out there somewhere (he believed at least, from what Akari had managed to share with him through writing in her pokedex), but Akari herself was right here with him. And she always had been, it just took the entirety of this trip to realize that. Now a small, watery pokemon hidden just within the flap of his coat collar, it was easy to keep her out of sight.
Ingo felt some guilt over the fact that he could no longer carry her in her water bucket around Jubilife, or even really have her out in the open at all. She had grown attached to residing in it during trips (and understandably so – phione dried out fast), but it was simply becoming too bothersome with Kana and her friend Miki snooping around. And Fancy – Miki’s staravia – was too interested in Akari for their own good. It always gave her the same stare those hungry coastlands murkrow did.
Thankfully though, he had yet to see any of them yet today. Perhaps it would be a little too hopeful to think they were currently too busy with corps work to come find him tonight. But he didn’t hold out on that – usually a trip into Jubilife guaranteed a forced visit with at least one of them anymore.
Ingo had seen a lot more of the two women lately than he would have liked to, ever since they caught a glimpse of poor Akari.
The phione’s true identity had been easy for Ingo to keep from the two women when the truth had been obscured even from himself, and he simply knew her as ‘Passenger’ . But now that he knew, Ingo felt it may take a little more strain to keep that narrative going; Akari had made him promise not to reveal her demise to anyone, especially not to Kana or Miki. And while returning back to Jubilife, she had made it abundantly clear she wanted him to just keep them away from her for a while. So for now, as far as anyone else was concerned, she was simply a wild pokemon that had become attached to him, nothing more.
But obscuring the truth would allow some problems to continue. During their last few run-ins, Kana had been heavily implying that if he wasn’t going to bother catching the novel Pokémon, she would catch it herself. She ‘had a job to do so as a survey corps member’ , as she had put it (not like Ingo had ever seen her particularly motivated to assist Professor Laventon with filling out his pokedex, though – he assumed it was simply a front to get her hands on a relatively new, conventionally cute, and conveniently portable pokemon that had caught her eye).
And even if Kana had been exaggerating her intent, Ingo did not want to risk that hypothetical. Not once had he tried to capture Akari in a pokeball, and he absolutely did not want to test to see if he could. He was fully aware that Akari was freaked out by all the unknown consequences that would accompany such an incident, even more so if someone like Kana would manage to catch her.
So, no bucket in town – nothing to tip off that he had her with him for anyone, but especially not for Kana and Miki. And not a word to anyone that she was alive and well, except for the fact that she was stuck in the body of a phione.
While Ingo had his own reserved thoughts about these tracks going forward, he understood Akari’s desired route. Technically, she had gone directly against Kamado’s orders. And after what had happened in the last few months, after the sky bruised red, Ingo knew Akari’s nervous uncertainty was… still there. And while he felt it would be received much better than she was expecting, and he felt ultimately it would be better to say something now rather than later, a small part of him didn’t blame her hesitance.
So for now, he would honor her wishes, despite the extra effort.
A soft clack against the table pulled Ingo from his thoughts. Beni had set down the order he’d made at the canteen’s front — the usual plate of potato mochi, bowl of rice, and steaming cup of tea.
“Ah, thank you.” The warden pulled the hot food and drink towards him. A quick scan of his order, and he realized something was missing. “…Oh. By any chance, could I request a cup of water as well?”
“It’ll be right out.” Was Beni’s only reply. Ingo suspected that the man knew exactly why he was asking for it. He’d seen Ingo order it just for his accompanying companion a few times, and probably knew she was with him. Ingo did not worry about him knowing, though.
The warden cleared his throat delicately, as if the simple action hurt. “And if you’ve got it, some combee honey with it as well?”
One of Beni’s eyebrows raised.
“Ah, not in the water, just with the order.” Ingo was quick to try and explain himself at that sight. He gestured vaguely to his neck. “For my tea. Sore throat.”
Surely, Ingo thought, Beni had heard him constantly shouting Akari’s name like a broken record outside Jubilife’s gates at some point over the last week and a half.
“Of course, I’ll send Magby out with it shortly.” He finally answered, turning to slip through the restaurant’s door and re-enter his kitchen.
“I appreciate it.” watching the door to The Wallflower slide shut, the warden was left alone to survey the Jubilife strip. At this time of evening, few people were out and about, browsing shops at their own pace, or standing in small social groups. A flock of what he presumed to be starly were out in the distance, amongst the sunset clouds…
Ingo felt something wriggle under the collar of his coat, impatient to move from off his shoulder. The sensation reminded him of the damp spot that had developed there.
“Stay on schedule, Miss Akari.” Ingo reminded her of what they had discussed earlier on the way back to Jubilife. “Remember, safety checks first.”
Squinting against the fading sunset he was facing, Ingo scanned the Jubilife strip street, looking out towards the Galaxy Hall.
A quick peek at the people shopping and talking. A few folks he recognized, but no Kana.
A glance over his shoulder at the training grounds. No Miki.
“Alright, it is now safe to exit the cab.” The warden tugged the flap of his coat collar back with a finger. He turned his head to find his hidden companion under the fabric, intending to safely remove her himself. However, he instead felt something damp wriggle down his arm from inside his coat sleeve. The suddenness caught Ingo off guard, but she was out of the fabric bridge and onto the table before he could even do anything.
Akari was certainly impatient to get something. Ingo would have guessed the plate of mochi was her target, but he didn’t find himself too surprised when he saw her heading for his cup of tea instead.
“ Phi! ” Akari grasped at the edge of the cup with her flippers, making sounds in her effort to pull herself up and over.
“Ah, refrain from boarding, I am drinking that.” Ingo gently nudged her away from it, before picking it up to take a sip. “I requested water for you, and it will arrive shortly.”
“ Phi,” She squeaked up at him, a tone in her voice revealing that she seemed to be lamenting something. It was so much harder for Ingo to understand her like this, but with some trial and error oveer the last day, he had gotten by with guessing most times. He knew she was starting to dry out by now, and was eager to find a substitute for her bucket.
And most likely, it was partially his fault that she was so desperate to get rehydrated. But he hadn’t had the heart to interrupt Anthe when she pulled him over to her shop for a half-hour conversation the moment she spotted him wearily shambling through Jubilife’s gates.
Bless the woman’s insistence on attempting to hearten him with every update to the Galaxy Team’s recovery efforts on Akari over his five-day absence.
“Nothing turned up in the fieldlands, but they’re still searching through the highlands, and they’re supposed to start combing through the mirelands soon… oh Ingo, they’re trying so hard.”
Anthe ended up apologizing when she became emotional herself, and Ingo could do nothing but extend comfort to her. She had no idea the watery blue pokemon situated within his coat collar was the very teen she was so worried about. And Akari had no choice but to slowly dry out on his shoulder over the course of that well-intentioned, but lengthy conversation.
“The tea is too hot for you. The water will be a more suitable option. We do not need you evaporating… again.” An earlier visit to Firespit Island had taught both Ingo and Akari that a phione’s aquatic body was quite prone to evaporation, especially when presented with the heat that the area exuded.
Ingo coughed, restrained but hoarse. He cleared his throat again gently, just as he had earlier. “And I require it in order to properly service my cab. Our last trip had left me in need of it, as I’m sure you understand.”
Endlessly shouting Akari’s name all throughout the coastlands for days on end, even after his throat had been stripped, and his voice cracked. Minimal water breaks sacrificed to instead continually search for her. Breaking down gracelessly the day before at the sight of Akari’s belongings strewn about Castaway Shore, and the horrific implications that such a scene presented. Then breaking down all over again when he realized that not only was Akari still alive, she had been right by his side the entire time.
Understandably, this all took a toll on him. Ingo had sorely overused and undermanaged his voice these last two weeks while searching for her. And for him, it took a lot to get to that point.
It was the entire reason why upon returning back to Jubilife after almost a week in the wilderness, Ingo’s first stop had been The Wallflower. He was sleep deprived, emotionally shaken, his muscles ached terribly, and both himself and his clothing desperately needed a proper scrubbing. But his throat was absolutely killing him, so tending to that came first.
Another sip from his hot tea, grimacing as a swallow spurred a sharp stinging sensation to flare down his throat. It hurt now, but it would get better.
He set down the steaming cup, but kept an eye on it to ensure Akari would keep out of it. As it was, he could see her staring at it longingly.
“Your water will arrive shortly, I assure you. But for now,” Ingo pushed the plate of potato mochi closer to her. “Take some time to properly refuel; we haven’t been keeping on schedule doing so as we should.”
The last five days had simply consisted of grazing on plucked berries whenever he had passed by a populated tree or bush. Stress-induced heartburn at night had already made the process discouraging, but it had been hard to justify sitting down to put together an actual meal when hypotheticals nagged at him.
Hypotheticals about how Akari may have been just out of sight, hidden right over the hill. Probably hurt. Maybe bleeding. Possibly passed out, or even-
At the time, it felt morally reprehensible to do anything else other than put every ounce of energy into looking for Akari, but in retrospect, it had been irresponsible to neglect his cab like that.
Akari had been even worse, though. With frequent refusals to eat any of the berries he offered her, she sometimes even threw them back at him in apparent irritation. Now that he knew this phione as Akari, he recognized she had been understandably frustrated at him for not realizing who she was. But back when she was simply ‘Passenger’ to him, a clingy and high-strung enigmatic Pokemon, it had been exasperating and confusing behavior.
“Phi.” Phione pointed at the potato mochi, then at him.
“In a moment, I will. I’d like to take care of this first.” Ingo gestured to his throat, before reaching for his cup of tea again. Without honey, the fleeting relief was much too temporary. “Go on and eat.”
“Phi-phi.” Akari squeaked, seeming to accept his answer for now. Using her flippers, she pulled herself over to the plate, and flopped over against one of the potato mochi patties. Ingo watched as bubbles began to fizz inside her transparent body, similar to water slowly climbing towards its boiling point.
Her body was simply just dissolving the mochi to absorb. Over the course of the two weeks she had been with him, Ingo had seen her gradually shift to eating like this. At first mimicking human eating habits and gumming on food, Akari had eventually succumbed to this method instead, realizing it was easier for this form.
Ingo remembered that Laventon had hypothesized the species used their bodies to filter feed in the ocean as they drifted in the cold depths. Phione didn’t exactly have teeth. Or a skeleton. Or a recognizable muscular system, or even proper skin. He didn’t really know what the frail species’ body did have – as far as he could tell, they were almost entirely made up of water. So he supposed a process like this shouldn’t be surprising.
Soon enough, the patty was gone. Ingo cleared his throat gratuitously after another sip, setting the cup aside for the moment. “Alright Miss Akari, I’ve been thinking about our next trip out to the coastlands.”
“ Phi? ” Akari shot him a puzzled look.
“Indeed! It’s been on my mind the whole trip back,” Ingo guesstimated Akari’s reaction. “And I’m considering when we next depart, our first stop should be over around Veilstone Cape. If that’s where your belongings were found, perhaps your, well… your original body is still somewhere nearby.”
“ Phi!” A firm, disagreeable shake of her head.
“No? Do you think we should look somewhere else?”
“Phi-phi!” Was that a yes, as in “yes, look somewhere else!” ? Or no, as in “no, you’ve got it all wrong!” ?
“Ah, should we… survey the cliffsides then?” Thoroughly confused, Ingo had no idea if he was even interpreting things right anymore.
“Phi!!” Akari was definitely becoming more animated with her methods of disagreement. He was headed down the wrong track, surely.
“Alright then, do you believe it’s not even located within the coastlands anymore?” Ingo was trying to make sense of her adamant disapproval. “Should we set our destination somewhere else? But how far could it go? Surely as a natural water-dweller, I would assume it would be slow to leave the shore…”
“Phi-phi!” At some point during his rant, Akari had flopped off of her mochi patty and over to his arm, just to smack his wrist with a flipper.
Ingo halted to turn his attention to her; ok, that was her ‘please stop and listen to me’ tone. He would know after being constantly subjected to it for two weeks. “I am sorely misinterpreting this, aren't I?”
Finally, an agreeable head nod. It seemed the complexity of this conversation needed more than just ‘yes’ and ‘no’ answers to maintain itself.
And Akari was very much aware of that. She leaned over the side of the table and pointed down at his… waist? His thigh? The bench he was sitting on? It was admittedly hard to tell when she was gesturing with an amorphous flipper, as opposed to a clear finger.
“Um,” Ingo’s confusion put a stop to Akari’s attempts at pointing. She sat back and stared down at the wooden patterns on the table for a moment, clearly considering something, before she squeaked enthusiastically. Ingo watched as she held one of her flippers out stiffly in front of her, while wiggling the other in front of it. Big, determined eyes stared up at him intently the whole time, hoping he’d understand.
It almost looked like she was imitating the act of taking notes in a…
Oh!
“Are you requesting your pokedex?”
Akari nodded her head vigorously, seemingly happy he finally understood.
“Bravo!” Ingo mirrored her sentiments before it fizzled into a cough – that’s right, Akari had used it yesterday to try and communicate with him, pointing to words and pictures, and even attempting to write something at one point (it had taken a very long time and hadn’t been very legible in the end, but they could work on that). He turned to the side, reaching into his coat pocket in search of the waterlogged field book. In the moment, he had practically forgotten he had it on him. “Alright, let me retrieve it for you.”
Maybe she had a map in her pokedex? So she could point out the location they needed to go to next? Or perhaps she even had something recorded within the pages about this pokemon she has swapped with, that could give them a hint as to what happened-
“ Starr! Rrravia!!”
Sudden, frantic squawking and flapping of wings directly by Ingo’s right ear jumpstarted his heart. A loud bang as his knees hit the underside of the table, causing the dinnerware to clatter. Almost dropping the pokedex, Ingo jerked his head back up to see the very two people he was attempting to avoid for Akari’s sake, now heading right for his tableside.
The culprit of the excited squawking — their curious staravia, Fancy — was pecking around his plates on the table.
“Ingo! Where have you been?”
Great. That sentence was sharp with thorns.
“Ah, Miss Kana, Miss Miki… Hello.” Ingo’s tone wasn’t as warm as he supposed it could have been, noticeably so. But then again, five days of agonizing over horrific hypotheticals in the wilderness had drained him of social courtesy in the presence of unwanted company.
Plus, he couldn’t entirely help his aching throat from sounding like it was full of rough gravel.
A quick, not-so-inconspicuous survey of the table between calibrating blinks as Fancy continued to poke around the table. Among his dinnerware, Akari was suddenly nowhere in sight — something that was equal parts relieving and terrifying to him.
Was she hiding from them?
“It’s been five days since we last saw you! Were you out in the wild this entire time? We were starting to wonder if something happened!” Miki told him.
“Ah- no, no-” Ingo’s words stalled, attempting to simultaneously search around the table, and keep a proper conversation going. Fancy seemed interested in the general area by his plate. Ingo attempted to see where its gaze was pulled, in case it had caught a glimpse of something small and blue. “Besides a rather sore throat and tired cab, I am alright, I can assure you. I was solely searching for Miss Akari. And unfortunately, I- ahem , I still am.”
Ingo hoped that wherever the teen was, she understood the double intent and kept close to him. He didn’t want Fancy finding her before he did.
A look of empathy crossed Miki’s features (or maybe it was pure pity; Ingo was acutely aware of how worn down he looked, and his broken voice had involuntarily cracked. It could have easily been mistaken for swelling emotion), but Kana only seemed to grow annoyed at his words. Ingo wasn’t surprised, as he knew how she felt about how much time he was putting into searching.
Kana never stated her feelings outright, but her behavior had made it very clear to him that she was irked. Irked that Kamado was basically allowing him to drop half of his work to voluntarily look for Akari out of his own volition, while she was ordered to do the same thing.
The survey corps are already looking for her, Kana had practically scolded him the last time she saw him, five days ago when he was first heading out to search. That’s our job, because we’re the survey corps. You’re not. We’ll find her, but we need you here at the training grounds, doing your assigned job at least some of the time, ok?
She used ‘we’ a lot, most frequently during perplexing admonishments like this. Ingo sometimes wondered if Kamado was aware of just how much implied authority Kana utilized to try and inflate her words’ influence. She talked to him like she was Kamado, sometimes.
Or like she was Zisu, at least. But Zisu would never talk to him the way Kana tried to, even if she technically had the authority to.
“Well, have you found anything helpful yet?” Miki seemed to not be keeping an eye on her staravia at all. To Ingo’s slight exasperation, she either didn’t notice or didn’t care that Fancy was now pecking at his plate of mochi.
“Ah, I recovered a few things that might be of help, I suppose.” Ingo collected his plate and bowl, pulling them a little closer within the protection of his arms. Fancy glared.
“Well, that’s good…” while it was more appreciated than Kana’s hard silence, Ingo could not tell whether Miki was being pitiful, sympathetic, or unbelieving with that painfully, poorly-hidden sorry tone.
However, his statement was not a lie. Just a vague truth. He had found Akari and some of her belongings, now they just needed to find her body, from what he understood.
…Though, right now he was still vying to know where Akari herself was at this moment. With both himself and Fancy searching for her and coming up with nothing, Ingo was practically convinced she was not anywhere on the table, which worried him.
Speaking of the feathery pokemon, the absence of exposed food now left Ingo’s cup as the only lure. Fancy stepped closer, curious eyes fixated on the drink. Ingo could see their intentions coming from a mile away, and he was not about to have hot tea spilled all over the table and himself.
“Fancy, please-“ Ingo grabbed the cup right before they could poke their beak into the drink, sheltering it close with his food.
“Starr!” Fancy squawked indignantly at the action, flapping their wings. It hopped the rest of the way across the table to invasively jab at Ingo’s hand, most likely in an attempt to snatch his cup.
“Fancy! No!” Miki finally took initiative to admonish her poorly-mannered companion, reaching over the table to pull her staravia out of Ingo’s personal space. The scolding finally forced Fancy to flutter down to the ground, squawking all the while. With a sour disposition, they had to settle for simply pecking at the dirt instead.
“Sorry! I think Fancy’s just looking for your little friend!” Miki attempted to brush off Fancy’s behavior, as she always did. “…Where is that strange pokemon that’s always clinging to you?”
While straightening his coat and brushing stray feathers off himself, Ingo almost laughed at how desperately he wanted that question answered himself.
“Ah, Passenger uncoupled itself from me, and I am no longer sure of its whereabouts.” Again, a truthful statement. And again, Ingo hoped wherever Akari was, she could recognize the inherent worry that the phrasing implied.
Though maybe, Akari had retreated somewhere into one of his coat pockets. Was that why Fancy had been poking at him? Ingo kept his eyes on the two women, but all focus shifted to what his fingers were feeling out, his hand subtly moving to pat his coat pockets from under the table. Where was she-?
“What is that?” An element of morbid curiosity entered Kana’s voice, the woman speaking up for the first time in this whole conversation. The tone alone made Ingo’s hands freeze midway in one of his pockets.
“Is that… Akari’s pokedex?”
“Her pokedex?” Miki peeked over the edge of the table to get a better look. “Ooh! Did you find it out there?”
“O-oh. Well-” Oh dear. They’d seen the waterlogged notebook in his lap when he leaned away from Fancy.
All things considered, it was only Akari’s pokedex. But then again, it was Akari’s pokedex. Gut reaction told him it would be best that Kana and Miki not know he has that right now.
Why? It would cause trouble. How? Ingo wasn’t entirely sure yet. But he was holding onto Akari’s missing things. He hadn’t shared where they had been found with the Galaxy Team. He had Akari herself with him while the survey corps were still breaking their backs looking for her. He sort of knew what had happened to her, and kind of felt like he could piece together how to fix this.
There was a lot to uncover, all things considered. Putting it like this, Ingo for the first time properly reflected on just how much he was withholding. And it wouldn’t have mattered if he really only learned the truth about all of this yesterday — if Kana found out about even one of these things, he knew she would not spare any empathy if the narrative was in her hands.
Nervous jitters begin to tickle inside his ribcage. This felt comparable to suddenly realizing the tallgrass fields were unnervingly quiet because they weren’t empty.
“-Yes.”
That sounded much too certain, he chastised himself. Add some uncertainty.
“I… believe it is, at least?”
Ingo tentatively picked up the bloated bundle of notes to show it to them. People showed things to other people when they had nothing to hide, and he certainly had nothing to hide. Definitely not.
“I, ah, happened upon it while searching; the contents of the pokedex have sustained significant water damage, as you can see.” Ingo carefully flipped through a few curled pages to prove it, before setting it back down beside him. “So it is difficult to tell for sure. I was on track to deliver it back to Professor Laventon for confirmation, but when I arrived, it appeared his station had already closed for the day.”
A truthful statement. Laventon’s office was dark, because at some point in the warden’s absence, the professor had most likely joined the last survey corps group on their last departure. Laventon frequently went out searching for Akari too when he could, he simply was not as solitary as Ingo when it came to his methods.
But it didn’t seem like the two women cared much about that, though. At least Kana didn’t — she just stared at him with the same look she’d been giving him throughout the entire conversation.
Hands on her hips, it was beginning to feel like she was trying to come across like she was expecting something.
Expecting him to say something.
Ingo swallowed uncomfortably, this time more from social pressure than any kind of sore pain. Maybe he missed an obvious social queue… the majority of his attention was still lingering around what was going on beneath the table, if he was being honest.
Fancy had sneakily begun pecking at one of his shoes, furthering his suspicion that Akari was somewhere on his person. Ingo gave himself another subtle pat-down from under the protection of the table. She was definitely not anywhere within his coat pockets. If she was, he would have expected to feel a damp flipper bap his searching hand in response by now.
Where was she?? Nervous energy was continuing to build, only able to be somewhat subdued by a bouncing leg.
“So… is that all?” Kana’s barbed voice broke the silence, somewhat refocusing Ingo’s scattered attention.
Where was this even supposed to be going? Why were they still lingering around? The conversation felt awkward with how it was dragging, like they were beating around the bush. Ingo just wanted this interaction to be over, so that Kana and Miki could leave, and he could properly look around the area for Akari, and stop stressing over the idea that Fancy had grabbed her-
“Ah, I believe so?” Perhaps that would have sounded more authentic if he didn’t have so much urgency to just end things.
Wrong Answer. Kana, clearly exasperated at this point, exaggerated a sigh as she rolled her eyes.
“Our training session, Ingo. You weren’t here for my training session today. After you told me you would be.” She crossed her arms, her tone suggesting the experience was entirely unpleasant. “I had to train with Zisu.”
Poor Zisu, Ingo’s tired mind lamented what his manners would never let slip past his lips.
“You did?” Ingo said instead. “There was no need; I’m certain we rescheduled due to my expected absence. But not to worry, I will still be on schedule for it tomorrow morning.”
Kana’s hard glare gained a bewildered quality to it, as if Ingo’s skin had suddenly turned blue. “What? Today was the reschedule, Ingo.”
“It was?” Ingo’s split concentration once again reconvened on the conversation for a moment. “…It was.”
That’s right. He had scheduled a training session with Kana the day he was supposed to get back, having only been set to make up for another session he had missed earlier in the week.
But after finding Akari’s things scattered across the beach yesterday, he had sort of deviated from his plans of going back to Jubilife that evening. He had been so distraught, that he couldn’t see himself in any state to be around others, and still keep his dignity.
It seemed all the physical exhaustion and roiling emotions had scrambled his schedule and fed him unchecked assumptions — an extra day in the wilderness did not mean a pushback on the training session.
That’s why Kana had approached him. She was looking for an apology from him, or an explanation at the very least. And he had given neither.
The stark realization that he had failed to meet the schedule he had set brought an annoying, unwanted flash of heat to his face.
Ingo found himself sitting up a little straighter, haste fumbling his words. “Oh dear. I- I greatly apologize Miss Kana, I didn’t mean to derail like that. Genuinely, I had forgotten-”
“You always forget,” Another frustrated response was the harbinger that warned Ingo of the oncoming storm.
“Kana, don’t,” And Miki’s hasty attempt to quell it further told him that this had apparently been brewing for a few days now.
“Ingo, this is what I’m talking about.” Kana ignored Miki and took over. And because he’d already strained his voice way too much to speak over her quickly-raising anger and reclaim the conversation, Ingo let her. “You keep doing this! For almost two weeks now, you’ve been throwing aside your responsibilities at the dojo for something that other people are already taking care of-”
But they were all looking in the wrong place anyways, Ingo added a mental footnote.
“-and you’re not even following whatever you do manage to schedule!” Kana continued, none the wiser to his annotation. “People like me depend on those schedules you set, you know. I spent my only break in between these search expeditions waiting around for you, when I could have been resting instead! And look at you; correct me if I’m wrong, but I bet you’re going right back out there again first thing tomorrow, if not tonight!”
No correction was hurriedly inserted into her terribly brief breath between words, for really, she was not wrong.
“Ingo, I know Akari is missing, but you’re not helping anyone like this.”
Ingo’s frown deepened, not out of indignance or hurt, but as a plain reflex to opposition. He might have felt deeply offended by such blunt words, or even taken them to heart under different circumstances. But it was hard to truly do either when Akari was alive and well (wherever she currently was at this table), and it was solely because of him.
“ Ok, Kana,” Slightly horrified at the way her friend was talking to someone who was already clearly so spent, Miki pulled back on Kana’s shoulder. Ingo’s pulled frown must have given off an upset quality. “He’s just worried about her.”
“Aren’t we all?” Kana retorted. “We’re all looking for her! The difference is, we’re taking shifts to juggle all the other responsibilities we have around here. And he- ” an accusatory finger jabbed at Ingo. “-is not. Tomorrow, I’ll be surprised if he even still has a job here once I have a talk with Kamado.”
Miki actually appeared offended enough on his behalf to let out a little gasp, which surprised Ingo a little; normally, her reputation as Kana’s malleable friend led to stubbornly agreeing with her. Throwing a quick glance at him, she pulled Kana a few steps away to squeeze half-audible whispers through gritted teeth.
Now Ingo’s frown really did emphasize a conflicted expression as they conversed about him. While objectively Kana’s entire viewpoint did come off as insensitive, Ingo couldn’t help but feel he wouldn't be so torn on the treatment if he hadn’t failed to meet the expectations that he himself had set.
The biggest problem here was that Kana felt she had been stood up by him several times now, because all things considered, even if they had been accidents, she had been.
Really, the only reasonable path forward was to apologize to her, offer another solution to the dilemma, and hope that went over well. First and foremost, he wanted to right his wrongs where he could. However, he couldn’t deny that a tiny part of him was motivated to just get them out of here quickly, so he could find Akari.
But a genuine apology required talking. Lots of talking. And Ingo felt his vocal cords were running out of steam for that.
Kana and Miki were still currently arguing at the end of the table. Ingo grabbed his cup and tipped it back, expecting another swallow of hot tea to soothe the fire in his throat long enough to present an offer. He could get this over with quickly, then-
To say his poor heart stopped would be an understatement when he felt a loose, lukewarm blob bump against his lips with a warning squeak.
Tea sprayed out his nose and between his teeth. Whatever Kana and Miki were saying halted abruptly as Ingo lurched forward, choking harshly into his cup. Only after the dramatic reaction had calmed somewhat did Ingo become aware the flow of words had stopped around him, and he was being stared at intently.
“Wrong… wrong track, apologies-” He half-bluffed, wiping at his mouth as he continued to cough through his words. “-I’m alright.”
“You sure?” Miki extended.
“Yes.” Ingo attempted to regain composure and clear his throat as he moved to protectively place a hand over his cup.
So that’s where she had been.
Perhaps Fancy’s attempts to get to his tea had been more deliberate than he thought. But at least he had found her.
“Look Ingo, it’s clear you’re… working through a lot of things right now.” Kana gestured to him with a palpable irritation that only sharpened otherwise-understanding words. “Just forget it, tomorrow-”
“-No, please stay for a moment.” Ingo hated interrupting Kana, especially considering where he stood with things right now, but he had to correct these tracks. “Miss Kana, I would like to propose an apology. A proper one.”
Despite it being the last thing his aching legs wanted to do, Ingo pushed himself to stand up from the table. A proper apology required approaching it and addressing recipients with seriousness and respect, and it just seemed more genuine not to do things while sitting down. He kept his cup of tea within his hands, though.
“One must conduct themselves with integrity, and keep to their expected schedules for those that depend on it. And yet, I failed to arrive at our set destination yesterday. For that Miss Kana, I deeply apologize, and I fully intend to make it up to you. Your time is important.”
Kana said nothing, simply looking him up and down. Perhaps she was sizing up his apology, expecting more. Or maybe she was even questioning if he was in any state to uphold such a thing, believing him prone to forget yet again. And Ingo could see where she was coming from; her knowledge of his true situation was slim to none, and he was aware of how flippant things must have looked to someone who did not know.
Could she cut him a little more slack? Maybe (definitely). But he had essentially neglected her twice now.
And he did genuinely feel bad about that.
“Now, I wrongfully assumed my schedule included our training tomorrow morning, and as such, I have already set aside time for it. That offer is still open. I am well aware my word may not mean much to you at the moment, but would you be available at that time to begin the training session we missed?”
“I’m leaving early tomorrow with a group to comb through the highlands. I won’t be here. Remember?” A flat, barbed response unapologetically slapped Ingo across the face.
“Alright then…” Shake it off. Ingo cleared his throat again, to the point where it was becoming annoying. “When are you scheduled to return?”
“Three days. Could be four.”
More of a push than a slap this time. “Well then, when you return, I will be stationed here, ready for two consecutive training sessions with you… If you are up for that, of course.”
Kana seemed to consider it. Miki nudged her.
“I can do that.” Her tone suggested the compromise was still unsatisfactory to her.
Another nudge from Miki.
“And I’m sorry. About what I said about you. I know you’re trying to do a lot.” Rather mechanical words that practically creaked with how rusty they were. But it was an unexpected surprise all the same, even if it had been prodded out. “But Ingo, you can not forget again. Or I will tell Kamado about every single instance you’ve left me waiting within this week.”
“Of course, of course.” Quick to end the conversation on surprisingly agreeable terms, Ingo nodded his head. “That is more than reasonable. It will not happen again, I can assure you.”
“For your sake, I’d hope not.” It seemed as if injustices had been made right. Satisfied enough with the outcome, Kana turned to leave. Miki was quick to follow, with Fancy trailing behind. “I’ll be seeing you as soon as I get back, Ingo. Don’t go get yourself lost in the wilderness again.”
“Ah, likewise,” Ingo wondered if she could even hear him with his limited volume. “Please enjoy a good rest of your evening, both of you.”
Miki at least waved goodbye to him as they moved on towards the Galaxy Hall. Ingo stood there in silence, posture rigid until the two women were out of sight. As soon as the hall’s doors closed, Ingo sat back down and leaned closer over the cup, finally removing his hand from over the top.
“Miss Akari!” He whispered into the escaping steam. “I am proud of you for following procedure and hiding… but really? Of all places, it had to be in here? ”
“Phi!” The green-tinted liquid stirred, and a pair of miffed brown eyes blinked back up at him from within the ripples. Ingo didn’t need her to write it out for him to understand what she was implying.
“I didn’t know; I hadn’t seen where you had gone.” His stern features softened some. “I apologize, but next time, please board elsewhere.”
“Phi-phi phi,” Akari went on about something entirely indecipherable to Ingo, but it died down as she caught something. Ingo followed her gaze to spot Beni’s magby finally approaching their table, his honey and Akari’s water on the tray in its hands.
It had certainly taken long enough! But Ingo gave Magby some slack, he knew the Pokémon was rather shy, and had probably been waiting to approach the table after such incensed company had left. It looked like it was expecting a comment on its tardiness regardless though, keeping its eyes on the tray so as to avoid a stern look.
“Thank you, Magby. Your service is much appreciated,” Ingo made sure to properly thank the Pokémon as it finished unloading the tray’s contents with shaky claws. Bashfully (and somewhat elated), Magby chirped at him before turning to take the tray back inside, leaving them both in peace once again.
Akari immediately leapt from Ingo’s tea, splashing into her cup of water.
“Better?” Ingo asked, already pouring the honey into his cup.
“Phi,” Akari splashed the water with her flippers in satisfaction before submerging.
Stirring the honey into the contents of his tea briefly, Ingo tipped it back and swallowed the improved remedy – the relief was instant. Much better. “I agree.”
“Phi-phi!”
Akari’s give-me-your-attention tone. Ingo was pulled out of his little piece of heaven to see Akari leaning over the side of the cup, jabbing a flipper over at the Galaxy Hall.
“Uh,” A few days ago, it would have been impossible to parse the correct intent from such a non-specific gesture. But now that he knew this was Akari he was talking with, and knowing how much Akari liked to snoop when she could, he thought he knew what (or in this case, who) she was wanting to talk about with him. “...that conversation went better than expected, didn’t it?”
“Phi-phi,” Akari nodded her head with a compliant tone. Whew, that was what she was wanting to talk about.
“I know, I only got my head bitten off once,” Ingo’s attempt at an amused tone cracked terribly, and he stopped to take another drink of tea. “Though, there is some good in this. Now that tomorrow’s schedule has been cleared, It seems we’ll be able to depart first thing tomorrow, and head back out for the coastlands.”
Akari had been largely passive from within her cup, but it seemed these words put a fire under her. With a squeak, she practically threw herself out of her water and flopped across the table. It startled Ingo when she just kept going right over the edge after a quick peek over the side at his lap.
“Miss Akari, what are you-!” Ingo instinctively reached to break her fall, but lethargy slowed his reflexes, and she plopped the rest of the way down onto her Pokedex, still set down on the bench beside him. “-what are you doing? Be careful!”
“Phi! Phi!” Stern squeaking and both flippers smacking the Pokedex’s cover was her only response.
She urgently wanted to tell him something, and it was more complex than what a simple guessing game of yes and no could decipher.
“Alright, alright, one moment,” Ingo picked up the pokedex and pushed his plates back to make room for it on the table, balancing Akari on top of it all the while.
She got to work instantly, attempting to pry the cover open until Ingo gave in and opened it for her-
“Here, just let me know when to stop,”
-thumbing through the pages and waiting for an indication of some kind.
Ingo flipped past pages of maps, hand-written observations on pokemon, and informational notes on local flora. But Akari made no sound or movement, so Ingo kept thumbing through them. Only once the pages began flashing blank faces did she reach up to bap his hand.
“Here?” Ingo stopped, exposing two blank pages to her.
“Phi!” A resounding yes. So, blank pages… she was going to write or draw something for him then, he assumed.
“Alright,” Ingo pulled out the pokedex’s writing pen from where it was clipped on the side and handed it to her. Her tiny little appendages wrapped around it as best they could, and Ingo leaned forward to watch as she began to scribble on one of the pages.
T…
Perhaps it was because he had been setting his mind towards nothing but marking and reaching certain destinations for weeks , but Ingo’s mind couldn’t help but jump right to a location. Tranquility Cove? Or maybe Tombolo Walk? Both locations were not exactly on land. But there were sheltered places amongst rocks and ship wreckage near both areas. Would the phione possibly seek out shelter there? Ingo just knew that he’d find a way to them if that’s where they needed to go-
A…
TA? Neither place had A as the second letter. There goes his previous train of thought.
She definitely was not writing out a location. She could have used one of the maps for that anyway. It was going to be a message.
And this message was going to take a while, Ingo assumed. With the limited mobility of her flippers and the size of the pen in comparison to her, the work was rather messy and slow going. He resigned himself back to his rice and potato mochi as she continued – both would have normally been considered disappointingly cold by now, but if Ingo was honest with himself, it was still leagues better than anything either of them had eaten in days out in the wild.
When she was done, Akari dropped the pen with a slick splat and leaned to the side, glaring up at him expectantly as she pointed with her flipper.
Ingo’s hypothesis had been right – on the page, in big, boldly-scrawled yet shaky writing, it read:
TAKE A BREAK!!!
Three exclamation marks. She was serious.
Stalling on the words, Ingo mulled them over for a moment. “Miss Akari, I can assure you that I am alright, and will be even better tomorrow. Our departure is already scheduled, and I intend to keep with it.”
No squeaking, no shaking of her head, and no upset glare like he half-expected – Akari simply turned back around and continued the taxing effort of scrawling words across the page. When she had once again finished, she jabbed her flipper at the words with surprising vigor, then repeated the agitated movements at him.
NO TRIP. NEED REST
It surprised him a little, how adamant she was about this when her actual body was at stake. But it was clear she just wanted him to regain some lost energy, instead of trying to expunge even more from a tank that was already empty.
And perhaps she was right in wanting this. He had just spent five days out in the wild. Could he really put himself through something like that again? His will said yes, of course he could. But it was paying no mind to the aching in his muscles, already groaning at the thought of going back out there.
And honestly, what could he do like this? A sore throat. A headache feeding off of sleep deprivation. A deep aching that one night’s rest realistically wouldn’t pacify. Maybe if he had managed his cab a little better out there… but that was nothing more than a hypothetical now.
“Alright. I will… rest my engines.” Breaking up the sentence with a sigh, Ingo finally relented. He leaned forward against one aching arm as he gently massaged tired, darkened eyes with the other. He was in need of some decent sleep. “I do suppose the service is sorely needed. We will stay here tomorrow.”
Celebratory squeaking started up. A cold, wet flipper was felt against his wrist, bapping it animatedly – the only way she could really say thank you in this state. Despite his display of exhaustion, Ingo let out a quiet sound of amusement.
“Just for a day,” He reiterated. “And I still intend to be productive in my search efforts tomorrow. Perhaps just within Professor Laventon’s numerous books this time, rather than the coastlands’ beaches.”
The agreement was still plenty satisfactory though, it seemed. Akari clapped her flippers together in appreciation and made her way back to her cup of water.
Good, Akari had been pacified. Now Ingo just had to pacify his stomach – once he finished his meal here, he could finally go to sleep… in an actual bed! Ingo told himself he had been more than ready to go back out into the wilderness, but he couldn’t deny the thought of resting with an actual stuffed mattress under his back and soft blankets keeping him in a tight, warm hug until noon sounded like a dream.
“Alright now, give me just a moment, and then we can depart.” Ingo closed Akari’s pokedex and pulled his plates back towards him. Akari watched lazily from her cup as he resumed eating and drinking what remained, and while it only took a few minutes to put it all away, by the time Ingo looked back to see how she was doing, he could see she had fallen asleep. Drifting around lazily at the bottom of her cup, little bubbles were slipping up to the surface as she slept.
Quite a different energy from what she had been displaying earlier. She had apparently been much more tired than she had let on. Very in-character for her, honestly.
“Miss Akari,” Ingo tapped her cup gently after stacking his empty dinnerware together, freeing a small cloud of bubbles from her mouth in surprise. “Are you ready to depart now?”
A half-asleep nod. She was barely with him.
“Alright,” Ingo lugged himself off of the bench and stretched contentedly. “Next stop then, the dojo’s spare unit-” An intrusive yawn in between. “-All aboard.”
Slipping Akari’s pokedex back into his coat pocket, Ingo held his hand out to her, waiting for her to hop on. She flopped onto it sluggishly with a little yawn, and he brought her up to set her back within the familiar spot of his coat collar as he started for the training grounds.
The street was much quieter now. The sun had set a while back, and the dark strip was rather barren with barely any activity in sight. Ingo didn’t mind, though. As he walked, he cleared his throat; tonight’s situation had turned out relatively ok, but if that happened again, it might not go as well the second time around, and he had to address that. He hoped Akari was awake enough to listen to him.
“Ah, Miss Akari… I would like to discuss something real promptly, if that is alright. I want to admit that well, traveling down this route is much rougher than I had anticipated.” Ingo turned his head slightly in her direction as he headed up the hill for the gates, hoping she was listening. “I understand your feelings on this and am trying to honor them. But tomorrow, if we are going to relieve ourselves of some stress at your request, I ask that we also relieve a few others of theirs. Tomorrow, if he returns back to the station, we must bring Professor Laventon up to speed on your situation.”
“Phi! Phi!” Ingo’s frown pulled at the immediate argumentative squeaking that started up. It had taken a moment to kick in, but she was definitely listening, and it had certainly woken her up a little. At least she was paying attention.
“He is worried sick about you. I am sure he would be relieved to know you are alright.”
The squeaking began to lean more on the desperate side. Ingo felt a cold flipper bap his neck a few times.
“Now, you know he would not discuss your predicament with others if you requested, including Kamado. Your current situation will be safe with him. You must know that.” Ingo stopped outside the dojo’s doors, but kept himself from entering.
“Phi!”
That was her correctional tone. He had misinterpreted her reasons. A proper glance over at his shoulder – Akari had been staring up at him, but she averted her gaze at the possibility of eye contact.
Sheepish.
She was embarrassed.
“Miss Akari… I could not imagine him becoming angry at you, given the circumstances.” Ingo recalled the day Akari left on her fateful trip to the coastlands. She had told him that Laventon had suggested she take someone with her, and Kamado had required it. He would have gone with her, had she simply waited for him.
Ingo imagined Laventon would feel a lot of things if he revealed that the small pokemon he had gotten a glimpse at a few times over these last two weeks was actually Akari. Joy, relief, confusion… maybe disappointment for disregarding his suggestion, but not anger. Not in that moment, surely. Ingo could not possibly see Laventon getting upset when faced with the impossible truth that Akari was alive – he’d be too busy celebrating. The man’s optimism always seemed to outweigh any possible anger of his.
Kamado would probably be a different story. But they would not get into that.
“I believe Professor Laventon would simply be appreciative to know you’re alright.” Ingo attempted to reassure her. “You have seen how much he’s been worrying about you. He is feeling… very much like I was before I had known. Even if he is not past admonishment upon realizing, it may still be rather amiable in comparison to what you’re expecting. Wouldn’t you agree with that?”
“Phi-phiiiii-” Akari groaned, but the drawn-out tone suggested her concern gave way to reluctant agreement.
“So, you understand what I am asking?”
A squeak that sounded agreeable.
“And you are alright with it?”
Another agreeable sound, but it was significantly quieter and more delayed.
“...Would you like to discuss it more in the morning?” Ingo could tell sleep was weighing heavy on her again.
A cold spot nudged against his neck. She was nodding her head while leaning against him, not even opting to make a sound anymore. Yep, he was losing her again.
“Alright,” Ingo finally slid open the dojo’s door. A part of him was a little relieved that it was unlocked – Zisu had still been leaving it open in case, just for him. He stepped through into the darkness, closing it back behind him. “We’ll talk about it more tomorrow, then. Thank you.”
Oh now the bomb squad have special privileges and can explode balls deep anytime they like. Just get on your knees, light their fuse, and let them blow.
i cried listening to ruin on the way home from work one night and this is what yall get lol. its a follow up to the sensate focus fic i wrote last year but can be read independently!
Pairing: Geraskier (romantic)
Warnings: they’ve been going to couples therapy for a year or so, past broken relationship, geralt’s anxiety mentioned heavily, but he’s aware of how much progress he’s made, feeeeellliiinnngggsssss, also cant speak to clinical accuracy - im not a therapist nor have i been in couples therapy its just a thought i had
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“Sounds like you two had fun together!” Their therapist was beaming as Geralt and Jaskier told her about the couple of parties they’d gone to over the week.
Jaskier grinned and elbowed Geralt, “Even out in public!”
Geralt just sheepishly smiled. What he used to take as offensive now sounded much more like a brag gently disguised as a joke. Jaskier had even told him he was proud of him when they’d gotten home and Geralt had almost cried; he actually believed him. Every day it was getting a little easier to relax and remember they were in it together, that Geralt wasn’t just playing a part in the hopes no one would realize he’d bombed his audition and shouldn’t be there in the first place. Hell, they were even sitting closer together on their therapist’s couch. When they first started, they couldn’t sit farther away from each other, let alone look at each other while they spoke. Now their knees touched and if Geralt really wanted to he could reach out and grab Jaskier’s hand.
It was… well it wasn’t odd, but it was new. Geralt had never felt entirely settled in any relationship, as much as he thought he was when he’d married Jaskier, but now he was getting a handle on his place. He was figuring himself out just as much as he was getting to know Jaskier again.
“Hm, wasn’t as bad as I remembered,” he added, giving Jaskier a soft smile before turning back to their therapist.
She smiled, flipping through her notes to the beginning of her file, “It’s been a year since you two started coming in, do you want to hear how far you’ve come?”
Looking over at Jaskier to check, Geralt was greeted with a scrunched-up nose and a look of apprehension, “Maybe not?”
“Next time.” Geralt suggested, endeared but still a little exasperated at the way Jaskier refused to look back, even on pictures, from the year before.
“Maybe.” Jaskier countered.
“We’ll discuss,” Geralt decided, turning back to their therapist with a nod.
“Sounds good. I’d like to try something if you two are interested. I think you’re at a good point where it could be rather helpful.”
Geralt shrugged as Jaskier nodded excitedly. Geralt was learning his husband was much more eager to please than he’d thought, that when he knew what he could do to help he would do it in a heartbeat, sometimes to his detriment. It had riddled him with guilt for a while to realize the person he lived with and claimed to love was so kind and he’d taken advantage of it without even realizing it.
“Let's talk about what you need from the other person. I know we’ve been doing this since day one, but I want you to put it in your words and communicate it to them. What are the two most important things for you to feel loved and okay with being vulnerable?” Geralt stared at her like a deer in the headlights, every last word he’d ever known fleeing his head as soon as she’d asked the question. Jaskier, however, was frowning the way he did when he wrote and couldn’t condense a paragraph down like he wanted to.
“We’ll take the hour to figure it out if we need to,” she looked at Geralt for that bit with an expression Geralt had become all too familiar with, “But after, when you’re home, and only when you feel ready, maybe you can promise to be and do those things for each other. Only when you believe that you can, and really want to, follow through on those things. I don’t want you making any promises you don't intend to keep or think you can't follow through on. Deal?”
Geralt and Jaskier glanced at each other with little nervous shrugs before Jaskier took a deep breath and sighed, “Who goes first?”
-
That night, Geralt laid awake long after Jaskier had rolled away from him, mumbling something about being sweaty, and drifted off to sleep. The things Jaskier asked for weren’t hard… in fact, they were surprisingly simple. Part of him had worried that Jaskier hadn’t been entirely honest and was taking it easy on him- but he quickly pushed the thought aside. His husband had promised him he was being honest and their therapist didn’t call bullshit, and that was all he needed these days.
If he thought about it, he was already doing those things, albeit not confidently. But he was trying! And it was getting easier, not exponentially (hell, not even in a nice straight line), but just like telling his anxiety off, he was starting to do some of it out of habit. He finally slipped into unconsciousness thinking of ways he could go about bringing it up without making himself cry.
All the next day, Geralt worried himself near sick about it. Was he really ready for it like their therapist wanted? Or did he just want to be ready? Would it make Jaskier uncomfortable if he did it too soon? Before Jaskier was ready? If he cried? Given that Jaskier had told him point-blank that it is a relief when he cries, that one shouldn’t be a problem. But the anxiety seemed to be gaining momentum and he was scrambling to catch it.
When he got home from work, Jaskier was in the living room they never really used, plunking away on the piano he hadn’t touched since he started teaching and had a baby grand in his office. The old frame creaked as Jaskier opened the top and started tuning it. Geralt watched him in silence for a little while, biting back a smile when his husband mumbled to himself and swore as he scratched his head. It almost didn’t feel real. That sweet moment of peace and the warmth that spread through Geralt was still confusing, but he’d started savoring it. Hesitantly, he’d labeled it affection, but only because he didn’t want to jinx anything. He was almost certain it was that long brewed love that he heard couples who had been together forever talking about. It was close to what he and Jaskier had felt when they got married, just all the more fulfilling knowing it was hard-won.
Jaskier played a series of notes a few times over that sounded eerily familiar to Geralt but he couldn’t quite place it as his husband muttered to himself, “Which fucking one of you is being a bitch?”
“It's your A key,” Geralt supplied, a cheeky grin spreading on his face when Jaskier jumped and let out a shrill giggle.
“Come here, I need your ears,” Jaskier’s voice was melodic, rising and falling just like his laughter as he scooted over and patted the bench to the left of him.
Geralt settled in next to him, giving him a quick kiss on his cheek before settling with his hands in his lap, “How was your day?”
“Oh ridiculous,” Jaskier rolled his eyes, pausing to press the offending A key and glancing toward Geralt.
“Sharp. You fiddled with it too much. What was so ridiculous?”
Jaskier stood to reach in the piano and let a tiny bit of tension release on the string before sitting back down and plunking away as he spoke, “Oh one of the other professors had some sort of presentation with bonus points for dressing up and half the students were wearing feather boas! The other half were dressed like me in college, which I proved to them by showing them a picture and we wasted half a lecture but I had fun. I was going to have them do something incredibly time-consuming to fill up the hour anyway.”
“E flat needs more flat,” Geralt took his pause to tell him what he’d noticed and continued, “Which pictures did you show them?”
The smile he got in return was absolutely brilliant as Jaskier once again reached into the piano, “The Summer Social pictures where I had blue hair and you had an undercut with the Nirvana smiley face shaved into it.”
“Mmh, and that took a half-hour?” Geralt laughed, one hand resting on Jaskier’s knee as he sat back down.
“Oh yes! I’ve got a lot of talkers in this one. One asked me to do their undercut when I told them I’d done yours,” Jaskier snickered, leaning closer to Geralt as he began plunking that same familiar tune from before.
As they lapsed into silence and the soft notes filled the room, Geralt felt he could almost place the song. It was almost something he should know the name of immediately, he knew for sure that he’d heard Jaskier play it before, but it was just out of his reach until Jaskier looped his arm around Geralt’s elbow and rested his head on his shoulder. All at once Geralt remembered sitting at a different, clunkier piano that had given them splinters and plunking out a song together. A simple little melody and a simpler accompanying line that Geralt could play with one hand and keep up.
Hesitantly, Geralt rested his left hand over the keys he thought he remembered and started tapping out his line. Jaskier squeezed his arm briefly to show he noticed, but neither of them said anything until they’d finished the song out.
The final three-note harmony seemed to ring in Geralt’s ears as his heart beat furiously, “Hey Jaskier?” he whispered, gently leaning into his husband to get his attention.
“Yes, Geralt?” Jaskier whispered back, mimicking Geralt’s little nudge.
“I- I promise to be patient. And I promise-” Geralt had to pause to sniff and swallow back his tears, “...to be brave for you. I love you.”
For a few horrifying seconds, Jaskier didn’t make a peep. Right when Geralt was about to risk looking over at him, Jaskier gave a horrible snotty sniffle and a little squeak as he ducked under Geralt’s arm and wrapped himself around his torso.
Jaskier couldn’t keep the warble out of his voice as he replied, gasping through his tears, “Thank you. I’m so proud of you- I really really am.”
As Jaskier descended into tears, Geralt felt his grip on his composure slipping. He pressed his face to the top of Jaskier’s head and inhaled, trying to keep himself together and failing as tears streaked his cheeks. A year ago he might have rolled his eyes and called Jaskier a liar, afraid to trust that he actually meant it and afraid of feeling so vulnerable. But his words were comforting now; they silenced the little monster in his head, if only for a moment.
Only a few seconds later, Jaskier untangled himself from Geralt, holding his hand and sitting back to look at him while he spoke, his voice still squeaky and unsteady, “I love you so much it’s not even fair. I promise not to hide behind my jokes. And I promise to be brave for you.”
Geralt squeezed his eyes closed, committing everything he could about the moment to memory as he nodded, tears falling from his chin to his chest.
He squeezed Jaskier’s hands and whispered, “Thank you,” before his first genuine sob of the night pushed its way out of his throat. They sat on the piano bench just holding each other and crying for what felt like hours. Years of fear and loneliness were finally seeping out of their home as they cried and cried and wiped their snot on their sleeves and cried some more.
As they petered out to deep breaths and little giggles of relief, Geralt’s stomach growled.
“Hungry?” Jaskier teased, poking Geralt’s stomach and looking up at him like the picture of innocence.
“Apparently.”
“Post-cry-pasta sound good? Or pizza?”
Geralt kissed Jaskeir’s forehead before digging his phone out of his pocket, “You’ll want the leftover pizza for lunch tomorrow.”
Nodding and tapping the edge of Geralt’s phone, Jaskier chirped, “I will. Can we get bacon on this one?”
They stayed sat at the piano, playing their song and trading soft lingering kisses until the pizza arrived and fell asleep wrapped up in each other, lulled into peaceful dreams by their food comas and the comfort of each other.
