#toasty writes

[toastytoaster22]

All of this mp100 energy is infecting me. Resonate chapter 8 is over 3.5k and i might just explode.

[witchpieceoftoast]

(i wrote thing???  just a little continuation from the scene on the couch in 6x13 because the show not letting kara process her trauma is my villain origin story. and tagging @bluedragon-silence because my entire current supercorp situation is all her fault)

so kara keeps finding more and more reasons for lena to stay, and honestly lena is in no hurry to go anywhere because kara is finally home, and lena's home, and why would she put in the effort to find an excuse to go back to her cold, empty apartment when kara is here? 

but also with each new thing to keep lena close, kara seems to be getting more frantic, and it's getting late and lena is tired.

finally, after the 3rd 'oh just one more episode, lena, please?' lena takes the remote from kara and sets it aside and turns to her to ask her what's wrong.  kara deflects, of course. a lot of 'i'm just happy you're back!' and 'i've missed you!' which is all well and good, and lena absolutely believes the truth in kara's answers. but also, kara's lip is trembling and her eyes are glassy and when lena twines their fingers together, kara's hand is shaking slightly.

'kara, i'm not going anywhere. i would happily stay the night,' lena promises, and the relieved sigh and blinding smile kara gives her is almost enough to drop it and let kara carry on. it's so wonderful to have kara want her company.  kara's fingers around hers are clenching almost enough to hurt though, and they continue to shake, and there's no way lena can brush whatever this is under the rug.

'please tell me what's wrong, darling. i'm not going anywhere, but i don't want you to feel like you have to hide anything from me.'

after minutes of clear internal struggle and a few sniffles, kara finally admits, 'i've been having nightmares.'

lena's gasp isn't out of surprise, because honestly she would be surprised if kara wasn't having nightmares after her ordeal.  it's from how strained her voice is, wet with unshed tears, verging on a sob, and it strikes right at lena's heart.

'since i came back. every night i have these nightmares that i'm back there, that this is all some delusion. you went away and in my nightmares, it was for good and you ne-' kara takes a shuddering breath and lena pulls her close. the rest is said muffled in lena's sweater, soaking up kara's tears. 'you never came back. you didn't want to be near me ever again. i would wake up crying and everything was cold and empty and you weren't here, and i'm terrified that if i let you go, that will be real.'

lena is crying too, now, as she holds kara as close as she can manage.  her fists are clenched around kara's shirt in a death grip, and she places kisses on kara's hair that she knows kara is too trapped in her own head to notice.

'i'm here, kara. kara, darling. look at me, please?'  it takes more strength than it should to loosen her fingers, but her need to sooth kara's tears is far greater.  her fingers swiping over damp cheeks, grasping at kara's face to assure her that lena is right here with her, calms kara enough to look up.  'i'm so sorry that i went away as soon as you got back. but i promise i'm not going anywhere.  there's nowhere i want to be more than right here with you.'

they both choke on their tears as they smile sadly at each other.

'and, if this really is just a delusion -' kara's entire body tenses at the thought, but lena's smile softens and she runs comforting fingers through kara's hair - 'if it is, i promise you with absolute certainty that the real me is doing everything in my power to make sure you come home.  okay?'

kara smiles brightly as she nods.  she laughs until she has to sniffle again, and then she laughs some more. 'okay.'

'okay,' lena says again, kissing kara's forehead and smiling into the warmth of her skin.  kara is home. she's traumatized and hurting and there's so much that's needed from both of them, but she's home. 'now, as much as i'd love to stay up all night watching trashy tv with you, how about we get some sleep.'

[the-enby-bird]

Destined Interlude 1-- Memories

yeah idk

this has no real place in the current story, it happened in the future but yeah

read on ao3

part 1 of the main story

Cross slammed his tail against the hard metal table, pain arching up it at the harsh movement. Water splashed out and onto XGaster, who sighed. “X-055, you do realise this would all be so much easier if you would simply behave?” The doctor’s voice sounded chiding, barely disguising disgust and hate. Cross struggled for a moment more before the doctor used two of his hands to yank hard on Cross’s fins. Cross barely stifled a scream, tears gathering at the edge of his sockets. He stilled, and could feel the doctor’s sick grin as moved away. “So that’s what it takes to make you behave… I’ll make a note of that.”

Cross stiffened as he felt a needle against his arm, but didn’t move. The feeling of the syringe crunching through his bones wasn’t a good one, but it paled in comparison to the feeling of a foreign liquid mixing with his marrow. It was cold, somehow, and he could feel his body trying to reject what was surely another “experiment”. Those never ended well. Cross didn’t know why any of this was happening-- what he had done to deserve this.

Cross’s vision began to fade in and out. A freezing sensation, like being submerged in freezing water, spread from his arm out. It was odd, seeing as the shallow pool he was strapped down in was quite warm-- almost too warm. His joints locked up as the cold reached each of them, leaving him stiff as a board.

The doctor hummed. “Perfect,” he muttered as he ran his hand over Cross’s tail. Cross’s vision started blacking out, his eyelights being forced into disappearing. “Tell me when you wake up, will you?”

Cross woke up with a scream, panting as he snapped up from his relaxed position. He felt a hand touch his arm and slammed around, the water nearly boiling with bright red magic. All he could see was a messy blur of colours, and it was so, so, dark. Muffled sounds echoed all around him, panicked and concerned angry. Nononnono don’t leave me alone again nono please leave me alone no PLEASE-

“CROSS!”

A shout broke through the haze, giving Cross enough faint clarity to see his surroundings.

“Minnow?” Horror’s voice was soft as he swam a bit closer. Cross could see Dust and Killer behind them, Dust carefully supporting Killer. Cross could smell blood.

...Why?

“Minnow…?” Horror spoke again. He was now close enough to almost touch Cross. His hand was out, hovering right beside Cross’s arm. Horror seemed to move to block Cross’s view, concern clearly written on his face.

Cross hesitated less than a second before collapsing into Horror’s arms, sobbing. The taller monster wrapped his arms around Cross, sinking to the ground.

Cross could feel the displacement of water as a finger reached down to rest on his back. “Darling jewel, are you alright?” Nightmare’s voice was too loud. Cross made a muffled noise of displeasure, but he couldn’t be sure it was heard.

“Cross…?” The smell of blood was back, accompanied by Killer’s voice. Cross whined and turned around. Blinking tears from his sockets, he tried to examine Killer for injury. Killer swished closer, sighing. Cross immediately tensed-- he had disappointed them again, hadn’t he? His mate was going to be mad, and then he’d have to leave and- “Hey hey hey Crossy, it’s okay. It’s just a scratch.” Cross hadn’t noticed he’d been hyperventilating. Killer wrapped his arms around Cross, hugging him tightly. Cross immediately noticed Killer’s exaggerated deep breaths and began to match them.

Cross felt Nightmare’s touch again, this time on his skull. Dust wiggled in next to Killer, wrapping his arms around the both of them. A light stream of unfamiliar magic wrapped around him. Sleep tugged at his eyes, his body starting to feel light and floaty. The last thing he felt before sleep pulled him away again was a soft kiss placed on his cheek, warm and gentle.

[burnt-toast-life]

Okay so it got a bit long so I’m splitting this into parts so ^w^ @gorovs

Blossoming Erosion (Part One)

Word count: 917

Content Warnings: mild violence, implied manipulation

Characters: Tartaglia, Bennett, Noelle

Well, it didn’t take being a Fatui Harbinger to be able to tell when something is wrong. Unusually wrong. The eleventh of the harbingers (or is he the tenth now that the eighth was gone?) was sitting atop a tree, watching from a stable branch and feeling the cool breeze of Mondstadt air not too far away from the team’s current camp. Usually it was rather noisy, the four people on the team being a more chaotic sort- if not alone then when together for sure. Though for now it seemed only the hydro and pyro remained. The unlucky adventurer, Bennett, was attempting to make food for everyone, having to leave halfway through charring it in order to gather more supplies. Tartaglia was only keeping watch in case of danger, and to protect Bennett from his own bad luck.

Quite the disaster combination, really, bad luck and someone who thrives in the disastrous circumstances that come from it. Though maybe that’s why Noelle, with the help of the admirable Honorary Knight, requested they specifically work together when the team must split up. They balance out well. Though one thing is for certain today… whatever bad thing Childe could sense, the mild feeling of dread he knew all too well… it wasn’t because of Bennett’s luck. Whenever bad luck struck, all Childe would feel is thrill and excitement. This was different. Something was wrong, wrong. And not knowing what it could be really dragged his mood down.

“Everyone, I’m back!” The leader of the group, the maid and Knight of Favonius-in-training Noelle, had returned. Her usual calm and cheery voice was almost off-putting in the atmosphere Tartaglia was stuck in, it made everything feel even more wrong. Of course, he wouldn’t dare voice his concerns, not while the others acted oblivious.

“Greetings, Comrade! I presume your trip went well?”

“Oh yes, indeed! I’ve gathered up plenty of tools and supplies, we shouldn’t run out for quite some time!”

“Oh, that’s so cool!!” Bennett had hopped over now, moving to give the maid a rather tight hug. “Thank you Noelle, we appreciate it!!”

“O-Oh, it’s nothing, really, don’t worry about it” she giggled, watching the adventurer as he backed off from the hug. “Actually, Bennett, could you do me a favor? I was unfortunately unable to obtain whopperflower nectar, if you could be so kind as to farm some I’d greatly appreciate it.”

Bingo. The first confirmation something was off. Bennett nervously left to do as told, whether he wanted to or not. It was unknown to the party what exactly had happened, but ever since a few days ago, Bennett’s been a little more on-edge about a thing or two- whopperflowers included. Noelle knew this. Why would she make him do something he obviously wouldn’t want..?

“Hang on, I’ll go too-“

“That won’t be necessary, Tartaglia. I have something I wish to discuss anyway.” Bennett was out of sight and earshot now. Childe hopped off the tree, landing in front of the party leader.

“Oh? Go figure- there’s something I wish to ask you in return. You didn’t leave on your own- Kaeya was with you, wasn’t he? How’d you get split up?” He moved a step closer, acting calm while also trying to intimidate her. It didn’t work.

“Oh, he had to do his own thing, don’t worry about it.”

“Did he say what he was doing?” He usually leaves some sort of note or mention, after all.

“I’m afraid not this time, apologies.” Bingo. Something else that’s off. Childe narrowed his eyes.

“Oh really? Where was he last?”

“I last saw him near Windrise-“

“Great. I’ll see you later then, Noelle.” The harbinger tried to leave before being grabbed by Noelle, the maid’s grip being strong enough to keep him back. She had quite a lot of strength despite what she may think of herself, after all. “Ah, Noelle, is there a…” he paused as he turned to look back at her. Her expression seemed… darker, almost. A sweet smile with a manipulative, chilling meaning hidden behind it. It was way worse than any gaze Kaeya had pulled on him in the past. “…Noelle..?”

“I said not to worry about it. Kaeya is fine.” She pulled him back by force, attempting to pull him to the ground. Luckily, Childe was on guard now and didn’t allow her to make this move so easily.

“Oh, I get it, you must’ve gotten me alone to get rid of me since I’m Fatui. And after all we’ve been through, too… doesn’t Mond have a political alliance with Snezhnaya as well? Fighting me is sure to cause some sort of diplomatic crisis!”

“Oh please, that’s only if I am caught, isn’t it? Don’t worry about that, everything will be fine!” Her cheerful voice almost made this scarier. She let go of him as she pulled out her claymore (the debate club), aiming to strike Tartaglia. Naturally, he dodged this slow attack easily; he had much more experience than Noelle, but there’s no denying how strong she herself is, either. And it’s still uncertain what exactly happened between her and Kaeya… hell, what if she just sent Bennett into a trap? It was extremely out of character and if it weren’t for him being the next victim of sorts Childe probably wouldn’t have thought to suspect her. The perfect criminal, if you will. Well, looks like this should make for an… interesting battle.

[toastytoaster22]

@luckyysstar just finished chapter 6 of Issho and that prompted me to spend the morning rereading and just. Teru's paralysis at the front desk haunts me and will forever haunt me. I know that for the sake of his development and for the introduction of Reigen, I needed to have him go to the Children's Center, but...

No matter how many times I get to that moment where he is at the front desk being discharged. That moment where he wants to scream at the top of his lungs for the Kageyamas... in my head it happens. it happens and i can see it so clearly that i break my own heart just reading the next lines.

Somewhere in another universe, Teru screams and cries and won't let Mrs. Amamiya take him without a fight. And Saburo hears bc he was on his way out to pick up lunch for Ritsu (who is silent and scared and won't eat the hospital food) and he runs and runs and scoops Teru up and holds him even if he has no clue what's going on. And he gets informed and gets furious and Mayuko comes and there's arguing and Teru still has to go to the center, but the Kageyamas are there a minute later in their own car.

And they apply to foster, and they are allowed, and Teru only spends a week or so at the center before shifting back to the house he is familiar with. And one would think that is better but...

Shigeo is shell-shocked and when Ritsu comes home everything is awkward and quiet and different in a bad way. Teru feels like he has ruined not only his own family, but the Kageyamas too, and is drowning. He's with a loving family but he is miserable. Shigeo is here with him but he's tormented by guilt, and nobody can convince him otherwise.

The Kageyama parents eventually bring Teru and Shigeo to Spirits and Such out of desperation. Reigen has no context or maturity to handle two traumatized kids but he bullshits his best and it's helpful but it's not enough. they only see him two or three days a week and the kageyama parents are getting burned out and worn thin and what do they do...?

And Teru is SO angry. It's building and building but he shoves it all down out of fear and shame and we all know he can't pull that off forever. And when he finally snaps he peels up the floorboards of the Kageyama living room and scares Ritsu MORE and and and

can't you see

It would never have worked out

Teru needed Reigen

and Reigen needed Teru

[toastytoaster22]

This new WIP was supposed to be three chapters. And now... and yet...

Oh no I've done it again

[toastytoaster22]

Resonate (66069 words) by ToastyToaster22 Chapters: 7/8 Fandom: モブサイコ100 | Mob Psycho 100 Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Hanazawa Teruki & Reigen Arataka, Hanazawa Teruki & Kageyama "Mob" Shigeo, Dimple & Hanazawa Teruki Characters: Hanazawa Teruki, Reigen Arataka, Dimple (Mob Psycho 100), Kageyama "Mob" Shigeo, Mogami Keiji Additional Tags: Everyone Is Here Though, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Canon-Typical Violence, its mogami so be prepared for his content in general, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Dissociation, the Toasty guarantee, Happy Ending, lots of hugs, and snuggles and general tenderness, An Issho-verse AU of sorts, anxiety and panic attack warnings for chapters 3/4/6, full cast is coming Series: Part 7 of Issho-verse Summary:

When Teru was ten years old, Reigen told him if he ever felt unsafe or uncomfortable during a job he could just say the word and they would leave. But Teru was tough and Teru was stubborn and four and a half years passed without him ever asking once to end a case early.

Figures the one time he did, the option would be stolen from him.

In more ways than one.

[toastytoaster22]

@bagerfluff would you believe the Iori series now has a fourth planned fic 👀