Dec 16, 2025
Tony wanders
Tony does
Tony wonders
Tony must
seen from France
seen from Singapore
seen from Mexico
seen from Singapore
seen from Serbia
seen from United States
seen from Brazil
seen from Germany
seen from China
seen from United States
seen from South Korea
seen from United Arab Emirates
seen from Germany
seen from United States
seen from Russia
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Türkiye
seen from United States
seen from Türkiye
Tony wanders
Tony does
Tony wonders
Tony must
the doorman passing by...
leaping greyhound cutting close
I smoke milkweed by the silver field
Where bell lungs ring
You know when I was 14/15 I wrote this story about a mountain troll who was different from his kind in that he needed to use his mouth and jaw to speak, while everyone else could do it via telekinesis. He hated his difference, everything he said sounded awkward, because it was said out loud, it would bounce and echo against walls, or sound thin in the open air. And it was always too loud sounding. The other trolls detest him, he felt that everyday.
One day, he got sent out on this mission, where he needed to travel to a place where telekinesis had no power, it was the one and only time he felt useful. I don't need to get into what he did on this mission, only that it was on his journey that he found out why he ended up so different, why he can only speak, while all the others can simply think. The mountain trolls are different from other kinds, they are never children, when they surface, they are already in their final form. But it takes a long time. They need to stay in the rock face for thousands of years before they can take shape. And so he finds out, that during his final gestation period, right before he emerged, a witch was on the run and had rested her body against the cool mountain, praying for safety. Her prayer and his gestation fell on the exact same moment, and so their two bodies were merged. He was no longer fully mountain troll, she was no longer fully witch. He gained the ability of speech, at the cost of the customs of his people. His family will never understand, that connection was severed before he even came into being, before he met them. But then this witch! This worldly witch, who makes it possible for him to communicate and connect with the everyone outside his race, the whole world! That’s what the story is really about, how he has to deal with the female inside him.
It’s so strange to me, how obvious the themes of gender and transmasculinity are, literally the core of the story. The whole point. But at the time of writing I didn’t see it. I think I must’ve known it, to some degree, the witch has always been in me, I just didn’t see her. I didn’t have a name for me, or the witch. Then came Tony and suddenly I have pieces to play with, in the most active way. All from a name.
Cleaning
Tony (to a female staff member): "I don't understand why our boss spends all this money on a cleaning service when there are two women who work here"
I sho’ll dewz luh da rain.
I shully, shully muh-fuh’n dew.
Luh dah sheeeitt!
G’dammy!!
"SHO'LL EEYUZ!"
Meaning: "It sure is."
Use in sentence: "Sho'll eeyuz!"
Eh... A Few More
"Fo' dat ass." = For you.
"Snap out them fuckin' dreams."/"Dream-Kill" = Stop dreaming/Quit your unrealistic expectations/To have your aspirations put a stop to.
"Purple Store"/"Jim's Transmissions"/"Putzfrau"/"Sears"/"Work for Frank"/"Frank"/"Frank Harlow" = Under-The-Table Employment/Drudgery/A Below-Minimum Wage Job/Wage Slavery/A very bad "working poor" job.
"Carol"/"Laura" = A Busy Body/A Nosy Woman/An Upper Middle Class woman who ignores the poor.
"Rich Sandwich" = High income disparity/When a poor family is surrounded by middle class households.
"Shit Sandwich" = A hopeless situation
"Dog Sandwich" = A situation where you're being bitten by two dogs at the same time.
"Easter Egg Pie"/"Libertarian Pie" = When all you have to eat is pie crust; you figure out what to put in it.
"Thriving"/"Thrivin' 'n Survivin'."/"Jeffersons and the Good Times" = Everyone else is doing fine/Everyone else is doing fine but you.
"Fuckeyes" = Eye problems/You need eye drops
"Thankstaking Day"/"Fucksgiving" = Thanksgiving/Thanksgiving for people who have little money or reason to celebrate it
"Let the sunshine in"/"Aquarius"/"Aquarius, Moon, and Stars" = Drugs/Under the influence of narcotics
"Chinese Wall" = A situation when everyone ignores you/When somebody turns everyone else against you.
"China Mart"/"Fuckmart"/"Great Wall of China" = Walmart
"Daniel Aushlander" = A professional who gets paid a lot to do nothing/Somebody who's not doing their job, but still gets paid
"Proik"/"Richard Von Proiker"/"Colonel Asswald"/"Black-Necked Crane"/"Sub-prime Loan" = An asshole
"Partied Overtime" = Got away with something wrong too long/Too irresponsible for too long
"Mama Mi Grande" = A giant animal/A big cat/A big cockroach
"Space Ghost"/"Space Ghost Coast-to-Coast" = Irrational/Crazy
"Sour Pie" = Mean relatives
"At least I'm twy'n" = People who don't do anything/People who lie about doing things/Lazy people
"They're eating Red Lobster off of it!"/"Art" = When somebody has committed fraud against you/You got ripped off/A conman
"Dem Boyz"/"Hawt Boyz" = The police
"Amerson" = Police brutality
"Kevorkian'd" = To put out of one's misery
"I don't cosign on that!" = I don't agree/I'm not helping you.
"Cut-Happy" = Somebody who rushes to do a job/A careless person
"Ain't nobody wanna hear aw dat!" = Nobody cares
"You backed the wrong cop, asshole!"/"Back the wrong cop/"/"Wrong Cop" = You chose poorly/You took the side of the wrong person
"Teddy Pendergrass'd" = Coercion/To force somebody to do something good by means of fear
"Rectumate the Shitcheeayshun" = To fix a problem
"Emptor your Caveat!"/"Go fuck yourself a nice day!" = Go fuck yourself!
"My stomach wrote a check that my ass can't cash." = Indigestion/Constipation/Diarrhea
"Dedd-Fish" = An unemotional person/A detached person
"Alabama Screwed" = When you not only have something bad happen to you, but the people who are supposed to help you refuse to do so/A no-win situation/To be taken advantage of with no recourse
"Syrupy" = A thick accent/Uncomfortably nice people
"Em-Baw-Wist; Oo-Wok-Widd" = Embarrassing/Awkward
"Acclimator" = A totally assimilated minority or immigrant/A person who totally gives up on their individuality to fit in with a crowd/A person who is convinced that their heritage, ethnicity, or personal points of view are a liability when it comes to existing or thriving in society/A person who unwillingly emulates others out of fear
"Murry Krimmis"/"Krimmin" = Christmas for people who can't afford it.
...
...one day I'm gonna tell you all where all of this shit comes from.
Some Extras...
"I'm GOP with it."/"I'm Republican about you." = I don't care about your well-being/You're on your own.
"Bitch-bath" = Washing yourself using your sink instead of a shower or bathtub
"Bernie Special" = Oatmeal and coffee
"Crotchwear" = Briefs underwear/Briefs wrestling trunks
"Whitehairs" = Wealthy people/CEO's/"1%"/Employers/Bosses/"The Man"
"Hadouken" = Lightning/Thunderstorms/The sound of thunder
"Throat-burn" = Alcoholic beverages
"Mail-Fruck"/"Frucktion" = Mail Lady/Mail Man/Mail Truck
"Marcus" = Bad children
"Slap-ass"/"Fiddleballs"/"Ball-fiddlers"/"Fatnecks" = Sports/Athletes
"Sleepy Joe" = Vice President Joe Biden
"Humbeestacean" = Snowberry Clearwing Moth
"Longfood" = Inexpensive food meant to last in the fridge a long time because you have no money for more
"Half-eyes" = People with incomplete Lasik eye surgery
"Swing-Low"/"Maleficent"/"Vesp" = Wasp
"Aunt Jamaima"/"Jamaima" = Ant
"Fucker"/"Heat Oppression" = The Sun
"Scagnetti"/"Browntown" = Cockroach
"Fitty Fat" = Opossum
"Fur Snake"/"Land Shark"/"Furbitch"/"Snakemouth"/"Fleabitch" = Cat
"I DOE LIE DAH!!" = I don't like that
"Yap-yark"/"Shit-mowf" = Dog
"Abdolayick"/"Abdolayick Muthafucka" = Spider
"FUHYEAH!" = Fuck Yeah!
"HALE-YERK!" = Hell no!
"You are pid!" = You are dumber than stupid (so stupid, that you are only worthy of being called half the word... "PID".)
"Zaku Flipper" = The act of flipping two-sided DVD's/People who are middle-of-the-road/People who play both sides of the argument
"Jumpers"/"Parafuckers"/"Bitebitches"/"Bit-Bitch = Flea
"Johnny Rock"/"Fatneck"/"Dan Blocker"/"Fred Flintstone" = Stupid men/Big Stupid Mean Men
"Hard Bitch"/"Acker"/"Mary" = Mean women
"Hard Nigga"/"Los"/"Carlos"/"Why-nard" = Mean men
"Cheryl" = Stupid women/Big Stupid Mean Women
"Limpdick" = Men who don't show affection for their spouses
"Cold Fish" = Women who don't show affection for their spouses
"Brunt"/"Errlap"/"Croaker" = Frog
"Anglerfish" = People who vent their problems to you, but don't want to hear your problems
"Lamprey" = People who use others
"Squint-Hog"/"Sweat-Hog" = Mean Obese People
"Scarecrow"/"Skeletor" = Mean Skinny People
"Hucker"/'Huckabee Beardsly"/"Con-Feds"/"Clem"/"Red Fucker" = Conservatives/Republicans/Southerners/Square State people/Country people
"Miss Labberole"/"Damn-crat"/"Crat"/"Blue Fucker" = Liberals/Democrats/Northerners/City Folk
"Randy P's"/"Pee Pee Rands"/"Bye-Bye Bobbies"/"Damn Yankee Daves"/"Teepees"/"Every Nigga Fo' Demselves"/"Spacehucker" = Libertarians/Libertarianism
"Arnie V's"/"Chris Christoffersons"/"Chris Crispies" = Moderate Conservatives
"Dicky Riders"/"Dicky The Ride"/"Sleepy Joes" = Moderate Liberals/Liberal Elites
"Ko-kee B's"/"Koko B. Wares"/"Angland" = Conservative Elites
"Bernies"/"Bluebitches"/"Pitchforks" = Progressives/Populists
"Fucky Y'allz"/"Side-Eyes" = Independents
"Kelly Layzners"/"Vapidity"/"Illiterati" = Politically unmotivated/Politically uninformed
"Slow-Hole"/"Slownards"/"Paintbrushes"/"Yellow Liners"/"Traffic Jam" = Centrists
"Flippy The Flop"/"Flip Flipofferson"/"Joey Leebs" = Political "Flip Floppers"
"Nanman" = Deep South
"Wei Kingdom" = New England
"Wu Kingdom" = Midwestern States
"Shu Kingdom" = West Coast
"Oh Kranada" = Canada
"Burn-Hole" = Urinal Track infection/Hemorrhoids
"Fire-Fucked"/"Fire-Fuckers" = STD's/People with STD's
"WOOOOOOO!"/"ROLL TIDE!"/"ROLL-TIDER!" = Took a shit
"Flavor!"/"Flavor, my niggas!" = Deal with it
"Eedatt"/"You go eedatt!" = Eat this
"Dree"/"Dreedatt" = Drink/Drink it
"Oh-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-HO! HOOOOOOOOOOO!!" = Oh REALLY?
"Keeps it moving; keeps it groovin'." = I'm moving on/I'm not going to bother with it/Not my problem
"Bang out like a REAL nigga!"/"Bang out like a REAL 'G'!"/"Bang-Out-BANG-BANG!"/"Bang it out!" = Get it done/You might as well do it/Let's do it!/Do your best!
"Froze-Hole"/"Snow-Hole"/"Frost Walrus" = It's cold outside
"Why-yoo-doo-dat?" = Why are you doing that?
"Go-Fuck-It!" = Leave me alone
"G'dammy!"/"Gam-Gammit!" = God Damn it!
"Hahahahahaha~OOOOUCH!" = Your jokes are not funny.
"Maybe it's Maybelline." = Maybe not.
"Ghetto Stank"/"Hot Fucker"/"Hot Ghetto Fuck"/"Heat Oppression"/"Oppressive"/"EE-HAW!"/"EE-MUHFUH-HAW!" = It's hot outside
"Shortfood" = meals created without enough ingredients
"German Day" = A poor person's holiday
"I thee I gorrah Boss-Tay-Yah" = Leave the South
"Brunt-pee-lee-yarr" = Montpelier, Vermont
"I caren't"/"I willn't"/"I shalln't" = I don't care/I will not/I shall not
"God Crow"/"Bojangin"/"Crownard" = crow/raven
"Chirp-Cherwillie"/"Flying Meatball"/"Brokebeak" = bird/songbird
"Pillie"/"Peter"/"Peepee Peter"/"Pilliewhacker" = penis
"Hotpocket" = vagina
"Vacayjay" = fake vacation (as in forced to go on a trip out of necessity)/A poor person's vacation
"OH-YAH-POO-BOOM-MAH?" = What's your problem?
"Gangsta Shit"/"Wall Clincher"/"Sweet-Hot Dumper" = a large piece of shit/need to take a large shit
"Retardo Montalban" = moron/stupid person/the act of being stupid
"Doopood"/"Styupudd"/"Yoostoopoo" = You're being stupid
"An ass of" = A modicum/A measurement of
"Stumblefuck" = a person under the influence/a drunkard
"Bumblefuck" = a buffoon/a careless person/a clumsy person
"Sprite" = A white person who tries to "act Black"
"Mind your phones; mind your business!" (In a Cliff Barnes accent) = mind your own business
"Bring toilet paper!" = Have an excuse prepared beforehand
"Calvin Toolage"/"Hoe-Ass Ass-Hoe" = A disagreeable person/An asshole/A jerk
"Snow Elf" = A stingy person
"Tree" = Teenage black boy
"Mop" = Teenage white boy
"Dunkel"/"Dunkel Cooper"/"Dunkleface" = Teenage girl
"Lick your fingers of it." = To take advantage/To profit off of others' misfortunes
"Oddafant"/"Elfadunk" = people with weird body types
"Musclefucker"/"Musclebitch" = A person with too many bulked-up muscles
"Gots it goin' on!" = Something extraordinary is happening/Something weird is going on
"Off your fucker!"/"Off yo' nigga!" = Insane/A crazy idea
"Too damn black for me!" = Too real/Too much to handle
"Fucky-no!"/"Fucky-naw!"/Hale Niggity; Hale Nawt!" = Of course not!
"Whole Works Figaro" = To have everything there is to offer/The best offer
"Booker T's" = blacks who think submitting to or denying racism now will earn equality or respect later/a meal consisting of fried chicken, mashed potatoes, corn, and a chocolate dessert
"Leave the gun; take the cannoli"/"Take the cannoli" = leaving with the shirt on your back/abandoning what isn't essential for survival
"Feeftayne Maynuttz"/"Wank-Wank"/"Freedom To Ride" = racism/racial violence
"Dewey The Huh?"/"Say Nigga What?"/ = Excuse me?
"FUCK BACK-FUCK BACK!" = Back off
"Horse-Dicker" = antagonistic person
"Yankee Macaroni" = cultural misconception/stereotyping
"Sweet-Sweet Huckerdom" = The South/Rural Areas
"Mad Cow"/"Muddlefuck" = when you can't remember/absent-minded
"Mee-Chee-GAW"/"Chillie D"/"Prison Mike" = Michigan
"Massie Chew"/"Massnachewsnitts" = Massachusetts
"Bruzznittz" = a loan
"Toof Daddy Combs" = P. Diddy/Somebody who thinks highly of themselves
"Eggs Mahoney" = somebody who smells/a situation where the only thing left to eat is eggs
"Kallah Fornz"/"The Fonz" = California
"The Wire/Merry Land" = Maryland
"The Land of Chin" = China
Grabasstical = Too flirty/Too personal
"Screwburree" = Strawberry
"Daydorr" = Dexter
"The Poorgias" = My family
"Shoot-A-Niggaz" = N.R.A.
"Broseph" = dude/homie/bruh
"Calms it downs"/"Slow it downs" = calm down
"Hatt-Doo-Wag"/"Christyland"/"Joy-Zee" = New Jersey
"Stop 'N Frisk"/"Yawk" = New York
"Optic Blast"/"Loomis Fargo" = People who stare/People who wear thick glasses
"Ineffectual Sun" = When the Sun is out, but the air is still cold
"Jailbreaker Bullnoi" = Belligerent person/Someone who behaves like a convict
"Chort"/"Brap" = burp
"Brunt"/"Butt Trumpet"/"Boo-Boo Stank" = fart
"Gorp"/"Gorpation"/"Herk"/"Hork" = vomit
"Hell's Salad" = My yard
"Hagglefuck" = shopping (also stands for Krystal burger restaurant)
"Paco Hell" = Taco Bell
"Shit-bitch"/'Shi-thed' = a fake person
"Borebitcher"/"Goodnight Sugar"/"Goo-nigh Shoo-guh" = bored/tired/to give up
"ass-whappy" = sexual intercourse
"Plow/""Plow it in yer hole"/"Plow it down" = To eat/To pay off bills
"Hardcore Items" = Toiletries
"Gotta fuck it!" = have to use the restroom/have to eat/ have to do something you don't want to do
"Boon" = Spoon
"Fuck" = Fork
"Hurkey"/"Funken" = Turkey
"Clucky Fuck Cluck!" = Coward
"Gotta Wick It!" = Have to pee
"JAL-LAP-PEN-NOES"/"Mexican Pickles" = jalapenos
"Tonyisms" = Tony's slang
"Walting"/"Bobbying"/"What About Bobbying" = Obsessive Compulsive Behavior
"Joe-Jah"/"Joey J"/"Joey The J"/"Joey Jiggles"/"Jojo's Bizarre Adventure" = Georgia
"Bitch Bitchofferson"/"Bitchy Bitchofferson" = A pushy person
"Bae"/"Baynard" = Flamboyant Person
"Shirtbacks"/"Not Without My Daughter" = Homeless people/Refugees/The act of fleeing a bad situation with no assets
"Baby Danglers/Danglers/Dangledooms" = Irresponsible Parents
"Butch-Snazz" = Traffic
"Let the boxes fall on you!"/"Ka-Ching, Ka-Ching!" = To commit fraud/To take advantage of a bad situation
"Foreign Fucker" = Illness/Infection/Foreign Body
"Bread Infection" = Yeast Infection
"Gootmee!"/"Eh-Goo-Me!" = Excuse me/Pardon me
"Vermint"/"The Longshanks"/"Close Enough"/"Loiny V"/"Bernieland" = Vermont
"Sell it!"/"Sell Yourself!" = Convince people who don't care enough.
"Thomas Walker" = A suspected criminal/An intruder
"Praise JEEESUS!" (in an old Black lady's voice)/"Praisy J!" = You know it!/Indeed/Absolutely!
Church Crown = Old Black Lady