It was LITERALLY the worst thing that had every happened to him. Worse than Lord Kelso. Worse than James Vane.
It began simply enough. Dorian had woken at one o clock (in the afternoon that is), eaten brunch in bed (and to think – the servants must have SEEN it, though naturally they had the tact to say nothing, but they SAW it and it ate Dorian up inside), dragged himself out of bed, immediately looked in the mirror to admire himself and that’s when things went WRONG.
His hair. It was a disaster. It was sort of flat on top and sticking out on one side and it was HIDEOUS.
Dorian let out a cry and fell into a swoon.
When he awakened his hair was still a mess. How had the Portrait let this happen? It should not be ABLE to happen!
He had rushed to the Portrait, but it didn’t have much hair left to judge against. What wizardry was this? He wanted help, but he couldn’t reveal his plight to anyone! He’d have to go in disguise to…a barber!
Luckily, Dorian had lots of disguises. He pulled one on and snuck covertly out of the house. He found a barber by the East End, a disreputable barber but Dorian couldn’t have a reputable barber tattling to high society about his plight.
The shop was dirty and seedy, and the people there of the sort Dorian associated with at night.
“I need assistance with my hair!” said Dorian dramatically.
“Get in the chair and I’ll help you in a minute,” said the barber disinterestedly.
Dorian got in the chair, which was squeaky. The barber came over.
“You need to take off your hat first,” he said.
“Never,” said Dorian, then relented and removed his hat.
The barber’s demeanor didn’t change in the slightest, even at the sight of Dorian’s shame.
“How short do you want it?” he said.
“Don’t cut it, just make it back the way it’s supposed to be!” said Dorian, and held out a £50 note. The barber raised an eyebrow. “Suit yourself,” he said.
Three minutes later, Dorian’s hair was returned to its normal, glorious state. “Tell no one,” hissed Dorian, and ran out of the barbershop.
The mystery of why this had happened was never solved, but Dorian woke up with dread every morning fearing that it would happen again.
