#trashbirbs

[thelioninmybed]

simaethae replied to your post “imindhowwelayinjune replied to your post “actualmermaid replied to...”

Surely the ultimate outcome is trashbirb dating sim tho

In hindsight this was inevitable.

[thelioninmybed]

Yoooo in that trashbirb au what is Maeglin :O

Maeglin is a kiwi. 

Dorky, nocturnal and flightless. 

[thelioninmybed]

vardasvapors replied to your post “actualmermaid replied to your post “calendille replied to your...”

is it possible to do a masterpost of the nolofinweans too bc is turgon still the slightly shittier peacock or the stressed out pigeon

Yes

Fingon

Violent, blinged-out peacock. 

Turgon

Stressed out pigeon (yes, I am going with the pigeon as trashbirb canon, thanks VV)

Aredhel

White hawk, ready to stoop upon some poor, nocturnal little forest dwelling birb.

Argon

The Great Auk. Adapted for cold climates, aggressive when threatened, utterly fearless, went extinct due to said fearlessness (I could’ve done the dodo tbh but that felt cruel)

[thelioninmybed]

calendille replied to your post “do you have any birbclaims for elf girls?”

Do you have a masterpost with all the fëanorian?

A masterpost is exactly what this AU needs. 

Maedhros

Started this bullshit. A tawny frogmouth. 

Maglor

Reverse nest parasitism, doesn’t shut up. A cuckoo. 

Celegorm

I almost went with the majestic duck cause they are the most fuckboi of birbs but instead I chose the shrike aka the butcher birb. These fuckers are tiny, creepy trophy hunters who impale their kills on convenient thorn bushes. Males court by bringing females back to their nests and showing them all the adorable woodland animals they have impaled, which strikes me as a very Celegorm thing to do. 

Caranthir

Great frigatebird

Curufin

A slightly shittier raven than Feanor. 

Amras/rod

A chicken.

Amrod/ras

A roast chicken. 

[thelioninmybed]

calendille replied to your post “sumeriasmith replied to your post “sumeriasmith replied to your post...”

Ah ah mute Curufin sounds so frustrated.

Curufin has SO many sick burns ready to go and he can’t use any of them, it’s incredibly upsetting. 

lsusanna replied to your post “sumeriasmith replied to your post “sumeriasmith  replied to your post...”

“I like to think I would oppose any plan involving abduction, imprisonment, and the blackmailing of the victim’s family but perhaps I flatter myself." YA THINK.

Present Mae's sense of irony wouldn’t allow it but give him a hundred years and a dead boyfriend...

sumeriasmith replied to your post “sumeriasmith replied to your post “sumeriasmith replied to your post...”

<3<3<3 Poor mute Curufin. And poor Maedhros. Truly family is a joy and a delight.

Hey hey, the real victim here is Celegorm; his best friend ran off with his girlfriend, no one is gonna take that well

[thelioninmybed]

1) which trash birb is Maglor then; 2) but consider birb photos equivalent to Finrod singing to Men; 3) is Fingon a trash peacock; 4) is Fingolfin one of those male penguins who balances his precious eggs and/or chicks on the tops of his feet and covers them with a layer of his warm tummy flub in order to shuffle them safely across the ice

1) Maglor is a very confused cuckoo committing brood parasitism in reverse. Put those chicks back where you found them, Mags! 

2) Finrod would be some sort of parrot, presumably?

3) Having just googled images of peacocks fighting, can confirm they are the precisely the correct blend of majestic and slightly ridiculous. Pictured below is Fingon moments before beating the shit out of Glaurung. (’Fingon no’ says Turgon, the slightly shittier looking peacock. Fingon does not listen.)

4) That is exactly what he is and I feel like anything I could add would be utterly superfluous. Guys. Pengolfin.