747.for him.ILYSB.talking body.
Read on AO3 (so freakin’ sorry if you tried that earlier and it didn’t work--my fault entirely, as I’m not used to posting on the AO3 as of yet)
Contents: smut, fluff, grinding, cuddles, song lyrics
Was I excited? Was I nervous? I didn't even know anymore. My own words echoed in my head, racing through the questions I'd asked myself a nearly a year ago. A few stood out- "Did you play your first live show yet?" Yes. "Did you get over your stage fright?" No. And there was one that I was insanely excited to be able to say yes to- "Did you move to L.A. yet?" Goodbyes were said and tears were shed with the promise of coming back soon, although I didn't know how quickly I'd be able to follow through on that. I could barely say, "Hey, Mom, I'm coming home for Hanukkah" without worrying that it wouldn't be a reality.
I had such a love-hate relationship with airports. On the one hand, it meant I was leaving one place for another, that I was in a new adventure. On the other, the airports themselves are incredibly boring. They tell you to get there two hours ahead, but no, every line you wait in is short and you end up getting stuck waiting for an hour and a half, as I was now. At this point, it was more hate-love-hate. I hated that I wouldn't be back here for months, loved that I'd be where I belonged for that time, and just hated the travel aspect of it. Although, I guess when it came down to it, I'd miss Perth. The sunsets, the people, the...
Twenty bucks says you look like shit. Miss you
I smiled at the message and figured it there was a good chance of it being true.
Probably. But you'll see me in like a day
The hell are you doing awake?
Connor💋: haven't slept for...idk a day or two?
Please, please get some rest baby. Little worried about you
He didn't reply for about ten minutes and I hoped he was finally getting a little sleep. That idea changed when my phone started ringing with his contact on the screen.
"You need to sleep," I said firmly.
I could hear a quiet yawn from him before his overly exhausted, wavering voice came through. "I-I'll be fine. Just been working a little."
"Con, I love you to death, but please promise me that when we hang up, you will close that laptop and try to sleep. Nothing is so pressing that it can't get done tomorrow."
He finally gave in, too tired to be even a little sarcastic. "Promise. I'll see you in a little while. Love you."
"Love you too," I whispered. Not much could throw me off, but the thought of my boyfriend alone tonight halfway around the world would always fuck with my head.
A little over an hour or so later, I was on a plane. Certainly not for the first or last time, but it felt new to me. We'd been grounded for what felt like forever, but was probably only fifteen or twenty minutes. I calmed down a little once the plane actually started moving, but I was still acting like a kid, jump-up-and-down-in-the-seat happy. I stared out at the world from my window seat and tried to focus on random tiny details, most involving Connor. For a split second, I remembered everything, his face after our first kiss, his reaction when I told him I was moving, and the smile that could make everything fade to grey.
I must've fallen asleep while remembering those little details, as I was in a new country for a grand total of one hour. I had no idea what time it was, but I knew what my timeframe looked like. Four hours already down, and about sixteen to go. I hadn't heard from Connor, but I took it as a good sign. Boy could be married to his work at times, honestly.
Compose New Message: Connor💋
don't worry if you're not up. just wanted to tell you i'm a little closer to you
I smiled, satisfied and sat back comfortably in another airport chair. No fun, but one more stop and then it'd be directly to L.A. I waited for the random existential airplane thoughts. When I was finally called for boarding, I was almost too distracted in the early stages of those thoughts to listen. Almost. I couldn't afford to miss a flight at the moment. Instead, I settled into a plane seat, turned my headphones up loud, and returned to my random deep thoughts. I realized there were a thousand mysteries in the world, but only one really stood out. I didn't know how many stars were in the sky or anything like that. And then I realized that I didn't really care about any of that. The only mystery that stood out in my mind was how on Earth I'd fallen for him and him for me. I promised myself that if I had to close my eyes and drift off into eternity, I'd wait.
In the process of those deep, existential thoughts that I didn't remember, I'd landed in New York. I was so, so close to home. I was in for the long run, and I knew it. And my heart was already in overdrive, two thousand miles away.
happy to hear! you got time to call?
I picked up the phone, smiling. "Hey, Con. You finally sleep?"
"I did actually. Felt really nice, too. How's traveling?" He laughed, probably knowing what my response would be.
I made a face that I forgot he couldn't see and laughed instead. "Boring as hell. Drives me nuts that we're in the same country and not together."
"Me too, but you're closer than you were...how long have you been traveling?"
"I don't even know what time it is anymore. But I know I'm close."
We both went quiet for a minute before Connor piped back up. "You're thinking about something."
It wasn't posed as a question, he knew he was right. I looked around and lowered my voice before saying, "Yeah, I am. Thinking about what I might do to you when I see you."
"You have quite the imagination," he told me. "Don't tell me what you have in mind, I want to be surprised. And maybe surprise you."
"Deal. I feel like I should go before I start walking around giving a free show to everyone here." I wasn't lying, but I was a few times more excited for home.
For the next few hours, I was back in the mindset of an excited toddler. Mostly. Maybe one difference. I could picture the way he always looked at me when he wanted to do something and every little detail from the last time we did. I'm sure I was blushing and uncomfortably shifting my weight, but damn, can you really blame me? I had managed to see what time it was in New York. A little before noon. Conservatively, I could be with Connor in seven and a half hours. A six hour flight should feel like nothing, but it felt like everything I'd ever do depended on this.
It felt like I counted every second from New York to here. Here? I was here! Finally! I half-ran through the airport and probably pissed a couple people off, but I got my luggage and called an Uber in record time. And I was on my way home. To my entire world, my beautiful boyfriend.
Connor never left my mind for more than a second, but he'd been front and center for this entire trip and I smiled to myself. I was home. Permanently. Sort of.
Despite the late hour and a couple concerning thoughts, I was happy to see a little bit of light from the house. I had wanted to sneak in and surprise Connor, but figured the chance of him killing me was relatively high.
"Con? Finally made it around the world," I said, knocking softly.
"Door's open, babe," Connor replied from inside.
I pushed the door open and dragged my bag in behind me. The light I'd seen through the window had been candlelight and through the dimness, I could see the outline and shadows of Connor's body. He was sitting, distracted and with his back to me, cross-legged and shirtless.
"Miss me?" he asked, smirking and pushing himself to stand.
"Nah, I don't even like you that much," I joked, dropping my bags and pulling at my jacket.
"Was wondering where that jacket went," Connor said, kissing me gently.
"You could've asked," I replied, kissing him back.
"I know." He pulled away and smiled.
"I assume you remember me saying I wanted to surprise you?"
"Can I go first?" I asked. "Please?"
I pulled my laptop out of my bag and pulled up an audio file that I'd been humming for weeks on end.
"Hm?" I looked up. "Oh, here'll work I think."
It wasn't edited much because it had just felt better that way. I hit play and stood up, letting the first couple notes echo around the room.
"Really?" he joked, taking my hand. "What is this, anyway?"
I kissed him to shut him up and smiled. "Shhh."
It wasn't exactly a slow-dance type song, but we tried, me whispering the lyrics softly against his neck.
Jump-starting your car 'cause the city's a bore
Buyin' e-cigarettes at the convenience store
Making new cliches on our own little tour
The second he heard that first verse, something behind his eyes clicked and he started to tear up. He swallowed and looked at me.
"I-I remember that," he whispered, so quiet I could barely hear over the music.
We'd fallen out of the sixth-grade slow dance stepping and by the time the first couple lines of the chorus came through, we were dancing like fools, holding each other close, giving each other little kisses between lines.
We try staying up late but we both are lightweights
So we get off our face, too easy
The tears were still welled up in his eyes, but they were shining. He knew that every word, every line was meant for him.
We're not a commercial for everyone else
We go out for coffee and keep to ourselves
We make little homes out of three-star hotels
And I know what you're feeling
The last verse, the original, first-draft last verse was what did it for both of us. Well, what did it for him. He kissed me hard as the last "all I need is you" started and ended, tears falling down his face, and that's what got me.
"I love you so, so much, Troye," he said against my lips.
"You don't have to say I love you to say I love you."
He made a frustrated noise and laughed. "Well, I do have another way to say it in mind, if you'll let me." His eyes had turned a darker shade of green, and he looked me up and down.
"I assume this one requires the bedroom?" I asked, running my hands down his sides teasingly.
"Sounds about right." He grabbed his laptop off the couch and started running. I followed, not bothering to keep up with his pace.
By the time, I'd caught up with him, LANY's ILYSB was already playing loudly from Connor's laptop.
And you need to know that nobody can take your place, your place
And you need to know that I'm hella obsessed with your face, your face
Connor was already on the end of the bed, facing me and mouthing the lyrics. He ran his hand through already-messy hair and looked me up and down once more.
I hesitated for second, solely to take in the picture in front of me before walking over to him. I kissed him, gently at first until he was leaving marks along my jawline and I was straddling his hips and running my hands up and down his sides.
"Oh, my heart hurts so good, I love you, babe—so bad, so bad." Connor murmured the lyric softly, just next to my ear and I shivered.
He was completely confident in what he was doing and it felt so... easy. It was so easy to turn each other on with the smallest touch, or in my case, whisper. I was sure that he felt my cock pressing into his stomach as he pulled me closer. The opposite was definitely true, and I continued kissing down his neck. The position got awkward, and he pushed me off, laughing and standing up to get out of his sweats before quickly doing the same to me.
"Pretty boy," he muttered, staring at me. It always amazed me how Connor changed during sex. He got... darker, somehow. He was still the sweet, loving person he always was but it was different. His eyes always changed to a dark shade of green and his voice almost always dropped about three octaves, and damn, it was fucking sexy.
The feeling of your skin locked in my head
I don't care, I'm down for what you want
"Was this the surprise you had in mind? Fucking to Talking Body?" I asked. No objections, honestly.
"Mmm, yeah. Sound good?" I nodded and laid back, legs already shaking slightly.
Connor took his opportunity to get on top of me and kiss me again, just as slowly and gently as always. I was already a mess and I loved it way too much. He kissed around my jawline and down my neck, chest, down to my thighs. He left small marks on my inner thighs, licking here and there. My hands tangled in his hair on reflex, already needy for something to grip onto. His lips were suddenly back on mine, and I moaned at the feeling of his hand wrapping around my cock.
"Y-your hands are freezing, you know," I quipped, not bothering to keep the tremble out of my voice. He laughed and kissed my lips to shut me up.
He'd started grinding down on me, desperate for any friction and my legs wrapped around his waist tightly. We were both half-mouthing and half murmuring along to the song in between kisses. It felt like a sex scene from some indie movie, where it's out of focus, concentrated on the music in the background. He shivered when he felt me whispering against the side of his neck, just above his collarbone I whimpered at the feeling of his lips next to my ear and his hips between mine. My face was pressed into his shoulder, still muttering against his skin.
"T-Troye," he breathed, eyes fluttering shut and lips just parted.
Even in my overwhelmed state, I got the message and leaned up to give him a gentle, open-mouthed kiss as he came over our stomachs. My toes curled and I gasped as his (now-warmer) hand pushed me over the edge faster than I thought possible.
Connor reached over to the nightstand for tissues and laid down next to me, giggling softly.
"What?" I turned towards him, giggling a little myself.
"You." He kissed me once again, and started cleaning us both up.
EASE had started playing out from Connor's laptop, and I smiled as he reached over to close the lid. He settled next to me and I cuddled closer to him, resting my head on his chest.
"I can't believe you wrote that for me," he said, draping an arm around my shoulder. "I'm the luckiest boy in the world."
"No, I'm the lucky one," I argued. I saw the way everyone else looked at Connor, and had been told I was oblivious to the way he looked at me.
"I'm twenty times more," he protested, looking down at me and laughing.
"Then I'm a hundred times more," I replied, looking up at him and pouting jokingly.
"I. Am. The. Luckiest." he assured, pecking my lips between words.
"...Fine," I conceded . "Then can I be second luckiest?"
"Of course. Still, I can't believe you wrote that. I mean, you got everything right." He was rambling, almost in disbelief.
"That was the point." I laughed at his reaction and kissed him.
And then he asked the question I'd been pondering since I'd written it. "So, is it going on the album?"
I went quiet, biting my lip and looking down. "I-I don't know yet," I whispered barely out loud.
"The whole world should hear this, Tro." I looked up again in confusion. "I know you didn't ask my opinion but-"
I smiled and laughed quietly. "I really don't know, Con."
He kissed my cheek. "I know you don't. But you should." He rubbed his eyes with his free hand.
"Sleep, babe. Lord knows we both need it." He nodded, reaching towards the end of the bed to grab both of our sweats. I took them and put them on.
He was tired, we both were. We laid down and it felt so safe, him pressed up against the curve of my back.
"You know, we really did look like badasses with those e-cigarettes," he murmured softly before drifting off.