#twilightheadcanon

[sharkysheets]

I dont remember if they have canon jobs already so here is my headcanon of what jobs the cullens have:

Esme - Teacher (probably for younger kids)

Jasper - McDonalds (crew member not manager)

Edward - Freeloader :/

Rosalie - Kohl's sephora (not a normal standalone Sephora, it must be in a Kohl's)

Alice - Small business flower shop (she can see the future for the best flowers to use for the situation)

Emmett - Construction (he's strong and pretty invincible so he's pretty safe)

[writershapeholeonthedoor]

Bella: I slept for twelve hours, but I think I'm still tired so i’ll go for another twelve.

Rosalie: Bella, that' a coma.

Bella: Sounds festive.

[writershapeholeonthedoor]

Imagine Twiligh Stuff

So literally none of the Cullens would have reacted the way Edward did after the birthday attack situation. Does anyone agree with me? Let me ramble here for a second. -So if Bella’s mate was Rosalie or Jasper (in this case, someone else lost control obivous), they would be so fucking protective, like never leaving her side, not even to let her go to sleep, they would be there anywhere at anytime until Bella gets tired of them and kicks them out. -Emmett and Alice would be all “well, shit happens”. Emmett would make jokes about it, but still be around more often, always putting his own body in front of her in case someone jumps from the corner, but like never being fucking insane like the others. Alice would be all focused on her visions so nothing like that can ever ever ever happen again, but wouldn’t be all crazy about safety or anything. -Carlisle would be the conversation type. The whole “we’re dangerous to you” conversation would happen, so would a lot of arguments on why Bella should get away from them. Maybe a little distant in first place, because he is guilty about all. -Esme would became insane. Not like Rosalie or Jasper, but making sure she is around and close enough to stop something else to happen, but also making little things and being more on PDA than before. No one, and I will repeat to make a point, NO ONE would have throw her on a fucking table full of glass and NO ONE would have leave her behind. Specially knowing that some crazy vampire was seeking revenge. Specially knowing how fragile was the human. Specially knowing how dangerous Bella could be to herself. Specially knowing they would leave their mate behind. So yeah... Edward is the drama queen.

[writershapeholeonthedoor]

Alice: She is the most amazing woman on the planet!

Esme: Wow, Alice, I'm so happy for you! When are we going to meet her?

Alice: She's right there in the corner, actually.

Esme: Who?

Alice: The one wearing the most ridiculous clothes the planet has ever saw. The planet must be confused if he like her or not.

[writershapeholeonthedoor]

Emmett Cullen x Jasper Hale Headcanons

-A lot of PDA, A LOT;

-No one looks at them in the wrong way cause everyone is so scared of them;

-Trainning all the time, they have fun doing it and, more often then not, it end up leading to sex, they even have a field just to have their fights

-So yeah a lot of sex too;

-A. Lot. Of. Sex;

-They’re fans of all super heroes movies, so they go together to the movies to watch the new ones the day they’re released;

-Cute and cliché costumes for Halloween (everyone's favorite one was when they dressed up as Daenerys and Kahl Drogo, it was hilarious, but the best was Joker and Harley Quinn, no doubt);

-Emmett buys dozens of cowboy hats to Jasper. He loves to see Jasper wearing them and Jasper loves to wear, so is a win-win situation;

-Both of them embarassing Bella when they go out together the best way they can;

-They participate of the parade every year. They paint their faces, wear flags and be the cutest couple ever;

-They play a lot of videogames but also others board games like chess, battleship, detective, monopoly, etc.;

-Their favorite thing to do when is rainning is to sit in the bedroom floor and play a game while they listen to some music;

-And that’s something they can’t never agree on. Music. They tastes are so fucking different is not even funny;

-When they’re planning their alone trips around the world, Emmett will give a random number for latitude while Jasper will give one for longitute. So they put that on the GPS and go wherenever it takes them (once they end up in a volcano and Emmett was happy like a child);

-They renew their vows every year on their anniversary. Simple and small, just a cute little party and nice words with the family around.

[writershapeholeonthedoor]

Can we all imagine a situation here? Cause I'm sure it happened:

Bella with PMS. Rosalie in her normal mood. Somehow, and none of them know the initial problem, they always start a huge fight when Bella has her PMS in action. Bella is the angry PMS type, so she will get annoyed by something Rosalie does or say and will start a fight. Rosalie, being Rosalie, will not back off the fight, specially cause she can not understand why that is a big deal to start with, and will start to argue with her. It takes them less then five minutes to start scream at each other and make accusations. "Well, I do not think you really love me, Rosalie!" "Well, Isabella, I think you're insane!" Rosalie, when she is being wise, will leave till her girlfriend stops acting like satan has just possessed her body. When she is back Bella is crying in the couch or in their bed, eating ice cream straight from the bowl, sobs leaving her throat. Rosalie will never know how to react or what to do, so she just stays there at the door thinking what would be the solution (mad about the whole thing at the same time). Bella would not encourage to approach or leave, so they stay like that until someone in the family makes the move for them. "Come on, Rosie, give your girl a hug or I will." "Bella ... just put the bowl down and stop changing your mind, you giving a headache." "None of you meant what you said, honeys, just talk about it together. " In the end, Bella ends up crying twice as hard while Rosalie hugs her and say it's okay. When the period come, Bella becames a fluffy ball.

[writershapeholeonthedoor]

Imagine Bella Swan and Leah Clearwater on a beach date

-Their first date is at La Push beach and it starts a tradition. Bella is the one who asked Leah out, so she has everything planned. They do a picnic and talk until the sun is set and the sea is starting to reach the rock they’re sitting on;

-After that day they go to daily walks at the beach. Leah picks Bella up from school and takes her to the reservation. They walk holding hands, foot in the water, in silence for most part of it;

-When Leah has a patrol duty and can’t pick her up, Bella will drive home to make some food, then drive to the reservation and wait for Leah to get to their spot at the beach. Leah is always tired, so Bella brings some extra blankets to cover her when she falls asleep (not that Leah needs them, but she apreciates it);

-They spent sundays afternoons with Jacob and Seth at the beach while Charlie is at Billy house. The boys are always ready to start a volleyball match, so they play sometimes, but since Bella is a disaster at any sport she is mostly responsible for go after the ball;

-Leah and Jacob likes to swim, so they always end up in the sea. Bella prefers the safety of the sand, so she helps Seth to build a sand castle;

-When Bella spend the night at the Clearwater’s they watch the sunrise together from their spot;

-When the winter hits and the weather is cold, Leah will stay in her wolf form to warm Bella during the night as they count the stars;

-When the boys do their parties at the beach they stay at the edge, feet deep in the sand, huging, just watching kids from all town being amazed by the beautiful beach;

-Leah proposed at the beach and they got married the same spot.