#twn rant

[gingersimasnaps]

So I've been thinking about Tissaia's death in The Witcher Netflix. I'm not going to dive into the fact she got herself fooled by Vilgefortz, that just a no go territory, because I refuse to believe TISSAIA of all the people would be so stupid, given the fact anyone with one brain cell could see Vilgefortz is no good.

BUT.

Her dead scene is so off. Yes yes, the guilt and the reason she unalived herself is basically the same as in the canon (which is surprising actually because when did the series gave a shit about canon?). The timing tho?

Tissaia hugs Yennefer as Triss knocks and informs them the vigil is starting (means everything is READY and Tissaia and Yen are the only two people missing). Yen goes while Tissaia says something about being there in a minute. Even if the journey from her office to the basement or vault or where the vigil took place would be across the whole Aretuza, it could be like 20 mins MAXIMUM between Yen leaving Tissaia and Yen running to find her dead.

In those 20 mins, Tissaia managed to write a whole ass letter, brush her hair, lit a pipe and smoke it, do her little "sometimes a flower is just a flower" spell and slit her wrists. In which fucking reality you manage to do all this in such a short time span?!

Second thing - when Yennefer feels the pain in her own wrists, it takes her like .3 seconds to realize what's happening, so she runs into Tissaia's office basically immediately. Again, even if it would be across the whole Aretuza, there's NO WAY IN FUCKING HELL she wouldn't be there in time to save her. She's a witch, she can portal herself to be there faster, and don't tell me you can't do that in Aretuza, because a) it's not Hogwarts and b) even if you really couldn't make a portal in Aretuza, it was in ruins, you could make 284 portals and dance between them. So, when Yen enters Tissaia's office, we see two big pools of blood, and again, no way in hell she would bleed such a big amount of blood in such a short time.

And okay, even if she would, THEY ARE WITCHES FOR FUCK'S SAKE! Yen could probably still save Tissaia! But they had to make her *just* weep and not actually do something to save her mother!

Now don't get me wrong, I'm actually glad Tissaia died (and I can't believe I'm saying this, but there was no plot for that character anymore, not to mention I ship Tissaia with Geralt and by Geralt I mean Henry and not Liam), but it could be done SO. MUCH. BETTER.

Thank you for coming to my TED Talk :D

[raspberry-rampage]

so TWN is Celtic now, huh

I’ve already complained about them avoiding filming in Poland like the plague (no pun intended but it’s actually a bit funny), but when I read Joey said ‘Celtic feel’ my insides churned once again. Why, why are you going on about ‘the Slavic’ and yet showing close to no influences from that culture? And I mean many things here - costumes, music, locations, monsters, way of thinking... Maybe I just don’t see those innovative decisions because I come from that culture? Idk, I’ll wait for the S2 and see whether there are some changes. Honestly, if Redanians are dressed like they walked from Ogniem i Mieczem or some other Polish historical film’s set, I’ll forgive everything.

[raspberry-rampage]

I’m rewatching the show and why are dryads... like this? They are supposed to be a different race or human females very influenced by the forest, but they look like slightly dirty and bedraggled ladies living in the woods. Just make their skin green, greenish, generally give them more plant-like appearance and boom, problem solved. I have no problem in them casting POC actresses, my issue is with the make-up and costume choices for them.

And also the prop department! Cause it’s hilarious to me that they shoot Dara with a bow yet we see no dryad with one. There are some with crossbows, but A - bows are so much sexier, and B - I’ve seen people saying that the bow is the iconic weapon of the dryads.

But I guess full body make-up for so many actresses and bow training would cost too much. Sigh.

EDIT: I realised that this may be an already old take, but yeah, wanted to vent nevertheless. This show suffers from not enough archers </3

[raspberry-rampage]

I have about ten drafts of rants about Netflix’s The Witcher, about various topics - the narrative, character development, costume design among them. But you know what? I’m done. I’m deleting them and this post is the last one where I waste any more energy on this show.

All the best to the people who enjoy this mess, I won’t be a part of that crowd. I had hopes after S1 and look where we are now - Ciri’s still running but now in a Bollywood costume, Yen’s wearing a blouse from Reserved and they’re reusing the awful 50 shades mask, and Geralt is still walking dramatically down hallways and drawing his sword slowly for dramatic effect. ‘Everything changes’, well, you’ve already changed it a lot compared to the source material. Continue with you fanfiction then, Netflix, as long as your budget allows it.

[raspberry-rampage]

oh, to be the creators of the witcher netflix series

and make pretty much the female main character of the series an annoying spoiled brat, which would’ve been fine and even endearing if they were younger looking and her development/character arc focused on overcoming those flaws;

and take a character, who’s in juxtaposition to other characters who are clearly non-human/identify as non-human HUMAN which allows them to have a different perspective on the world and be relatable and make some of their acts truly brave, and make them... non-human;

and try to invent the magic system and come out with something completely illogical, inconsistent and overall bullshit in delivery;

and look at a series that could’ve been one of the first big international series that celebrates the Slavic culture, but instead make it general fantasy or with Celtic/Nordic inspiration;

and take a beloved book series that’s pretty much considered a national treasure of fantasy writing, with a world-wide fanbase thanks to several succesful games, call their ‘creation’ an adaptation while it pretty much is a big budget fanfiction;