my highly detailed account of taking the abortion pill
neither one of us slept much that night. i wasn’t really emotional. he was more emotional that i was. but i just couldn’t get comfortable. i was hot and he was trying to cuddle. in my darkest and most irritable moment, i had wished i had gone home that night. but i was thankful for his support. we had talked about what we were going to do. i said i was 98% sure i wanted an abortion. he said he’d support whatever i decided. i pushed him for his approval of my decision, but i never really got it.
he had to go to work this morning. i’m writing this the day of. i had another doctor’s appointment this afternoon. completely unrelated. before i left though, i made a few calls. the first to my normal ob/gyn. they congratulated me first. i kind of shivered. they asked when my last period was. when i told them, the estimated i was about 5 weeks. when they said they’d schedule my first ultrasound in 2 weeks, i panicked a bit. i asked if i could come in earlier so i could talk about my options. the receptionist was confused. i told her i was thinking about terminating my pregnancy. she said we don’t do those here.
she gave me a number of a clinic to call. i made an appointment for 3 days later. that receptionist went through about a 100 questions. date of birth, date of last period, height, weight, race, insurance. my insurance didn’t cover the pill at all and she said she would have to verify about the surgical abortion. the surgical abortion scared me, so i said it was fine. then she said she was required by law to read this script to me. something about a women’s right to know. i didn’t pay much attention to it. just that i shouldn’t be coerced into having an abortion. i wasn’t. she also ran over the list of possible complications. they sounded scary, but not scarier than raising a child.
she ended the call with a list of instructions that i hurried to copy down. no food, water or gum after midnight. bring a jacket, it’s cold in here. you and your partner need an id to get in the building, no cell phones, no purses or big bags, no makeup or jewelry or deodorant or perfume, no AmEx, cash or card.
i got to my doctor’s appointment. i was surprisingly chipper for the morning i had. i blamed it on the coffee. it was a psychiatry appointment to be specific. she was refilling some of my prescriptions. we went over basic mood questions and lifestyle ones too. i was used to it by now. towards the end of our appointment, she said so there’s a note in your file about a pregnancy?
i was taken off guard. i had that kind of insurance where all of my doctors were tied together and usually in one building. kaiser permanente.
i explained it to her. she was sweet. one of the only people that had smiled or sounded understanding through this whole ordeal. she asked me how i felt and reassured me that it was my decision. i nodded and thanked her. and that was it. she refilled my adderall and sent me on my way.
