Varric: Yes, but you forgot that satisfaction brought it back. So yes, Cole, go find out if that thing can catch fire!
Solas: You're a bad influence.
Varric: And you don't know your sayings.
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Varric: In light of what you did for me, you can hug me for four to five seconds.
Cole: FOURTY FIVE SECONDS?!?!
Varric: No!! Four to five seconds!
Cole, already latched onto Varric like a koala: Too late!!
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Varric: How did you even get in here?
Cole: Solas's window! Or, as i like to call it, "Cole's door"!
Solas: I'm closing the window.
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Cole: Surgery is just stabbing someone to life.
Varric: Please never become a surgeon.
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Cole: It's okay to admit your mistakes, Solas.
Solas, stirring his coffee: No, really, I prefer it with salt.
These three HAVE to be one of my favourite party lineups in Dragon Age: Inquisition. The closest comparison to their chemistry is parents trying to advise their child while they both have two polar opposite ideas of parenting. THIS DYNAMIC IS JUST SBXHXJJFKKZKC *chefs kiss* 🤌
14 Days of DA Lovers Prompts, Day 3: “You Drive Me Crazy”
Written for the @14daysdalovers prompt event.
Prompt: “You Drive Me Crazy”
Pairing: Varric/Female Hawke
Characters: Varric Tethras, Marian Hawke
Warnings: Mentions of Canon-Typical Violence, Blood, Injury, Self-Destructive Behavior
Summary: When Hawke almost dies fighting the Arishok, Varric ends up exposing more of his heart than he planned the next time he talks to her.
It was three days before Hawke was awake for more than a few minutes at a time. Every time she woke up, she was in a haze of pain. The last thing she remembered was someone shouting about “the Champion of Kirkwall,” just before she collapsed in a pool of her own blood.
Voices drifted in and out of her dreams. Sometimes she heard one of her friends (it seemed to be Anders often) while at other times she heard Carver or Bethany or her mother. The speakers never seemed to materialize; she only heard their voices, and never any words she could understand. The only exception was when her mother kept calling her Marian. At least I can remember my own name, Hawke thought. That should count for something.
Three days after the duel, Hawke finally opened her eyes and the room didn’t swim away into the dark. Every inch of her ached. She wondered if this was how a sword felt on a blacksmith’s anvil. Good thing swords couldn’t think or feel—at least as far as she knew.
She turned her head. When did my head turn into an iron cauldron full of oatmeal? was the first thought that crossed her mind. Her skull felt so heavy, while her brains felt like mush.
The thought of oatmeal, of mush, sent her stomach churning, which made her head hurt worse. Although “worse” seemed an irrelevant concept. Measurements of pain didn’t seem to apply anymore, once you had reached “molten metal being pounded into shape by a hammer” levels of misery.
A groan staggered its way up her throat, tripped, and came out half a cough. The motion rattled her ribs and made her eyes water.
“Hawke!” came a quiet voice from nearby.
The faint firelight revealed that Varric had been sitting nearby, keeping watch over her.
“Hey,” she said. Or at least, that was what she tried to say. The sound that emerged from her scratchy, parched throat was more like a rusty door hinge creaking open. She cleared her throat, winced, and tried again. “Hello, Varric.” At least it sounded like words this time.
“Hello, yourself.”
“How long have you been here?” she asked.
“Me?” he looked incredulous. “I’ve been in your house for the past three days, ever since they brought the newly-minted Champion of Kirkwall through the door, bleeding like a villain in a Summerday pantomime.”
Hawke tried to laugh. She wheezed instead, but even that hurt. “I guess I took a beating, didn’t I?”
Varric let out an exasperated sigh. “That’s an understatement.”
“You sound upset.”
He took a minute to reply. That was usually a sign that he was holding back his temper. “Hawke, it’s no time to talk about this. I know it’s not. But I’m not sure it can wait.”
Hawke tried to roll over to face him, but her body wouldn’t move. The pain radiated again. “I would at least turn over to look at you, but I’m, uh, stuck,” she rasped.
Varric looked like she had stabbed him. “Oh, Hawke,” he said. “You’re a wreck.”
She let out the pathetic wheeze that currently served as her laugh. “Tell me something I don’t know. And don’t look at me like I’m dead.”
Varric took a deep breath, then stared down at his hands, laced tight in his lap. “Hawke, what was that duel?”
“Other than our best chance to stop the Qunari from taking the city?”
“No, that’s not what I’m talking about.”
“You’re gonna have to spell it out for me,” she told him. “I’m not in much shape to think.”
“I’ve seen you fight,” Varric said. His voice was full of barely-restrained emotion. The same voice she had heard him use once before, with Bartrand. “I’ve seen you fight mercenaries and burglars and Qunari. Hell, I’ve even seen you fight a dragon.”
“Living the dream,” Hawke murmured.
“Okay, there, Chuckles. Less joking, more listening. I’m serious this time.”
“I know,” Hawke wheezed. “You sound like you’re about to pull out Bianca and turn me into a pincushion. I’m hoping my jokes might save my hide.”
“Don’t quit your day job,” Varric advised. “My point is, I know how you fight, Hawke. And what I saw three days ago was nothing like that. You egged him on, left yourself open too many times, took too many hits. Worst of all, you looked like you were enjoying it, every time he landed a blow.”
“Varric, I—”
“Listen to me. I know you’re hurting, I know losing your mom hurt you worse than you’ll admit. But Hawke, I can’t keep doing this.”
“Doing what?”
“Watching you try to kill yourself.”
“I thought you supported the duel with the Arishok.”
“I did! Because I knew you could take him! Shit, Hawke, you could’ve wiped the floor with that blowhard. But when you walked in there, I could tell you didn’t want to walk out. I don’t know what kind of crazy death wish you’re carrying around, but you need to let it go.”
She closed her eyes, wishing for a minute that she could just go back to sleep again. But Varric had found her out, and she knew it was pointless to try and hide anything now. “Was it that obvious?” she said.
“To the others? Probably not. But you’re my best friend, Hawke. Shit, I never thought I’d care about anything in this damn town. And then I met you. I don’t have any family left that will claim me, but you and the others are more family to me than Bartrand ever was. And—you—you matter to me too damn much for me to sit by and watch you destroy yourself.” He seemed to be wrestling with what he was about to say next. Finally, he soldiered on. “Andraste’s ass, Hawke. I love you. I never thought I’d say that to someone again. But you walked into my life and settled in like you owned the place. I love you, and you drive me crazy. You get into more scrapes than anyone I’ve ever met and you probably should’ve died ten times over by now. Which is why I can’t stand to see you give up. Not like this. So, whatever problems you have, tell me next time. Or, shit, tell whoever you want. Daisy or Blondie are probably way better listeners than I am. Whatever it takes, just don’t throw your life away.”
If Hawke hadn’t been in her current state of severe injury, she absolutely would’ve had a stronger reaction to everything Varric had just told her. But considering her head still felt like a half-mashed potato, she wound up gaping at him like a cod someone had just hauled out of the harbor.
With an uncharacteristic show of restraint, Varric ignored her dumbfounded state. “You don’t have to say anything,” he told her. “Just promise me you’ll keep trying to survive. If you can’t do it for your own sake. . .well, it might be selfish of me to say, but I’d like you to do it for mine.”
Varric and Luca sleep together for the first time. Varric realises he's a lucky bastard.
(Luca was previously a dalish elf, but has no memory of the time, just the vallaslin. They are not a Lavellan.)
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click though for content tags! didn’t wanna get jumped by the algorithm innit.
So, finally got around to writing some varric/luca. it’s all smut, so y’know, proceed with caution, no minors, etc. you can find out more details abt luca here
Chapter two of my fic Believe Its Easier For You has been uploaded on ao3! This story is a late addition to the @hightown-funk collection as I was sick during the original due date, and I hope that anyone who enjoys Hawke/Varric pairings will enjoy this just as much!
