Selected specimens from my 7th grade class (one of them is me)
Super tall, like 6'3" at 13, and helpfully also visually impaired (not fixable with glasses and required a specialized computer, but still could get around). Wore neon shorts all the time, with only their prodigious leg fur to protect them from the freezing New England winters. Obsessed with Rick and Morty and dick jokes to a paralyzing extent. Was once wrestled into a shelf on the last day before Christmas break, destroying their Social Studies teacher's favorite mug in the process. Was in gifted and talented.
Rich even for a wealthy area (dad made 400k, mom stayed at home), managed to insert mentions of Fortnite into every conversation. Absolute moron, but somehow made it into advanced math (which was 2 grades ahead of normal math). Looked about 9, with curly blond hair, the same perma-shorts habit as the previous guy, and a Minecraft hoodie, making their ladies' man persona even funnier. Tried to make the shelf-wrestling incident into a meme.
Tried to forgo human contact as much as possible. If there was an excuse to put on their massive Bluetooth headphones and tween-angst out to Florence and the Machine, they'd take it. Never took their oversized, ratty Barbour jacket that belonged to their (alive, healthy, and emotionally present) dad off. It was part of a cunning boob-hiding plan that also involved too-small bras and tanktops with the straps shortened (to pull the neckline up) enough to cut into their armpits. (Them wearing the same pair of jeans for over a month was similarly unfortunate but unrelated.) Was in both gifted and talented (but quit in 7th grade) and advanced math, and wrestled the first guy into the shelf.
Their dad was the owner of a local construction company, and they had a very common "youneek" name. They were somehow the most socially awkward in a school not exactly devoid of them, and when they tried to seem impressive, they always ended up seeming pitiable instead. Somehow kept the same height, shape, buzzcut, and ill-fitting t-shirts for 4 years. Was in neither advanced math nor gifted and talented, and was not involved in the shelf-wrestling incident.
