#what?

[introvertedx10]

Foam does not equal fun you guys!

[hometoursandotherstuff]

[corkinavoid]

DPxDC Danny the Guy Who Won't Die

He lives in Gotham, and he is just A Guy. Nothing weird about him, he's just there to study/work/help Lady Gotham to lift her curse/on vacation with Sam. Point is, he is not there to cause trouble and there's no GIW on his tail. Just a dude living his (after)life.

And Gotham, being Gotham, still finds a way to be annoying. There are mugging attempts, robbery, Rogues running around. Only Danny really doesn't want to deal with any of it.

Now there's a dilemma. If he uses his powers to fight, it will sooner or later come to Bats' attention. And if he fights as a human, it will also alert some of the Bats since he doesn't really do a great job at keeping his power levels low. Not to mention the fact he is really not enthusiastic about accidentally punching someone hard enough he sends them to a hospital.

What does he do instead? He pulls the 'I guess I'll die' act.

So every time he is attacked, he just plays dead. The mugger shot him in the chest? He falls down and stops breathing. Caught up in the middle of a Poison Ivy attack? Skewers himself on the vine and goes lax. Scarecrow's Fear Gas? Very dramatically chokes himself and plays a corpse. He makes sure to disappear before any ambulances arrive later, and it all goes well for a few months - he is just a casualty, who cares, really - until one day, he runs into that same mugger who shot him in the chest a while ago.

The man does a double take. Danny doesn't notice - he's been mugged so many times, who has the brain capacity to remember all of those fuckers. But the rumor goes out anyway.

A guy-who-won't-die. It's more of a city legend, really, and the Bats don't give it much thought since, well, it sounds stupid and not very important. A rumor of some man who was shot dead and then showed up like nothing happened? Yeah, it's probably because the mugger didn't check if he was actually dead. That happens. Maybe it wasn't even the same man, Gotham is a big city. If anything, hey, at least that was one less casualty? That's a good thing.

That is, until one day, they show up to Joker's hostage situation and witness the clown screaming at one of the hostages. He is so enraged he is shaking, spit flying out of his mouth, and, contrary to the usual Joker's evil sneers and maniacal laughter, he seems just... furious. But, like, the normal-human-level furious. The 'I just lost the last ounce of patience with you' furious.

"Don't you look away from me, you think I don't remember you?! Na-ah, I do. You were the one I drowned in the shark tank last week! And you were the one run through the chainsaw trap two weeks before that! And you were in the guillotine!!! I saw your fucking head get deattached from your body, how the fuck are you here again?!"

And the guy he is screaming at just looks at him, confused and incomprehensive.

"Um, I'm pretty sure I'd remember getting my head cut off, you know? So, err, wrong guy."

"Wrong guy my fucking ass-"

Joker is so distracted by his screaming match that it makes it almost too easy for the Bats to fight him down and drag to Arkham. Yet, a few of them get just a bit suspicious.

Now, imagine all the shenanigans when they try keeping a watch on Danny the Won't Die Guy.

[tobeastaryoumustburn]

In third year , Remus decided to blast David Bowie in the common room of Gryffindor , decided to give the wizards and witches a display of what good music taste is.

The next morning , Sirius walks up to him , and says quietly , "I love David Bowie."

Remus , who had been busy in humming one of the lyrics of starman , looks up , a bit confused.

"What ?"

"I said I love David Bowie" Sirius repeats , praying to the gods that the other boy wouldn't see the slight hue of pink on his cheeks

[nightyboop]

While living in the mountain, Bilbo began to look sickly. He’s a hobbit: hobbits are made for the sun. Thorin becomes increasingly concerned and decides that his hobbit needs a very specialized outdoor environment where he can garden and sink his toes into the grass.

When Bilbo finally gets out into the sun he looks like that one video of the crocodile getting warm water poured on his head

[ministarfruit]

yuri month day 8: I want you to leave me ♡

(femslashfeb prompt list)

[ilovemybruciewayne]

Something im obsessed with is Richard’s obsession with his father, lol. None of the batfam can be normal about anything, much less family, so I wonder what Dick (n probably the other kids too) feels when his father randomly drops lore.

Or it can just be Bruce dropping random lore to anyone and moving on. Just. . Batman’s lore which is 80+ years of story telling condensed in a 40 year old

—🌸🐁

Dick "I know my dad best" Grayson vs everyone on Bruce's past.

He has a list. The reasons for hating on Khoa might go from "He's an ex criminal" - which will get him an obnoxious eye roll from Tim or a cautious look from Jason - to "he betrayed Bruce".

The truth condenses to pure, unaltered, visceral jealousy.

He enters the manor with a grin. He hasn't come over in a while. He uses the spare key.

As soon as his bike helmet is off, he announces himself.

"Your favorite kid came!!" He wouldn't mind if Damian ran just to kick him in the stomach, Bruce's amusement is always worth the punishment. But nothing comes. Nothing but silence.

Did he confuse the dates? No. He confirmed with Bruce if they were to be home for today. He emptied his calendar.

After a few moments of silence, he steps inside the quietness.

There's a faint sound that he understands as voices. Down. The cave? It's too early. Something in the back of his brain tells him he won't like what he'll find.

Of course he doesn't listen to the warning.

He should have listened to the warning.

Bruce is sat on his chair, civil clothes on. Damian is cross-legged, on the floor in front of their dad, Jon is at his side. Both kids are looking up with eyes filled with stars. He might even find it adorable... If it wasn't for the man leaning on Bruce's space.

Ghostmaker moves his arms around as he retells the story.

"Jack was on the floor, he looked like shi- garbage."

"Father?"

"I was young, son"

"Someone bestest you?! You're BATMAN!!"

"I wasn't back then, Jon. And it wasn't someone"

"It was all the strongest guards and students!"

"What? Why?"

"Ok, little flea-"

"Hey-"

"I already told that part, so If you ain't going to listen-"

"Apologies, please keep going"

Dick keeps moving down. He doesn't want to admit he's also intrigued. Bruce's eyes subtly come to him, lips already turning upward. Damian must have noticed, by the way he tilts his head towards him, but the kid is too involved in whatever the white cladded man is saying.

"So I saw my opportunity and just jumped to action"

"You followed him"

"He followed you!!"

"He followed me" Bruce smiles. And Dick's stomach churns with anger.

"The important part here is that I saved his a- butt"

"That he did"

"I'm guessing you allowed him to follow you to your next destination, then."

"He had no other choice"

"I had no choice. He was going to be hunted as well. Chum." Bruce fully turns to him. And the smile on his face almost makes Dick forget he's angry.

Almost "If it isn't the first pup!" Khoa's grin has Dick gritting his teeth.

With no subtlety whatsoever, he pushes Ghostmaker far from Bruce's form, and perches at his neck. If he could still climb him he would... Fuck it.

He gloats at the deep laugh his father gives him as he tries to position his long body over Bruce's shoulder. He knows Khoa is rolling his eyes under the mask.

Jon laughs "He looks like a scarf!"

"Richard, you interrupted at the best part"

"Right! Mister Khan was telling us about Bruce's training years together!"

Dick's eye twitches at that. He had barely been able to make his dad talk about that time. The man usually avoids the topic.

"We can keep it up after dinner" Bruce pats Dick's head as he dead weights across his back. "I can hear your tummy rumbling"

Tummy rumbling. Dick doesn't have the heart to tell him those are his bowels acting up at seeing Ghostmaker after so long. He can eat with his dad even if his insides burn in acid. After all, he knows-

"Are you joining us?" He smirks at the man at Bruce's side.

"Nah. I have other things to do"

He knows Bruce must be making that sad kicked puppy face, but dammit if he appreciates Khoa's repulsion towards the manor.

He cheekily waves goodbye over Bruce's shoulder as they all climb up the stairs. Bruce doesn't see Khoa flipping him off.