I know Inglourious Basterds isn’t meant to be a particularly realistic movie, but honestly, who came up with these names? It had to have been Aldo.
I’m sorry, but we can do better than this. Naming two officers, who re undercover no doubt, after two major cities in Germany? Now, I don’t know a lot about how last names work in Germany but you cannot get more obvious than that.
No matter how many times I watch this movie, I have to laugh at this. Munich and Frankfurt? Be so deadass.
“ Mrs (y/n) if you receive this letter, please don’t regret it. The end is part of the journey and this is the right end that awaits me.
Hugo Stiglitz and Willhelm Wicki died, many others are falling. The Kino operation is officially in danger and I’m sure it will sink together with all my crew.
But if I have to sink I want to be a hero, I want to die by killing the people who exterminated families on families, for the sake of it.
when I die I want you not to come and cry on my grave, I want you to look at that tombstone and to read that engraved name, proud and strong, proud of what the man who loves you to safeguard you and the future of our community.
If they asked me to leave again with a small pack of kids to go and kill the Nazis, I would certainly do it a thousand times more, but before leaving I would make sure I kissed those wonderful lips of yours, in a decent and passionate way, like a real goodbye kiss.
Your eyes had deceived me, making me believe that I would return to America to marry you, have a wonderful and long life with our children. But unfortunately I took my return home for granted, my love.
I just want you to know that I love you so much and that I am the luckiest lieutenant in this world to have met you even if for a short time.
Yours forever. “
- Lt. Aldo Rein
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DONNY DONOWITZ
“ Dear (y/n),
You know very well that I am not good at writing, you yourself have always told me that I can hardly speak, but if I am doing it it is because I have my good reasons.
The Kino operation is now complete, we will attack a cinema and blow up all those Nazi pieces of shit. You know that I will be the first to fight and therefore also the first who will probably die. The cinema is fucking filled with exhibits and it is obvious that we will be like fucking kamikazes in this situation.
If I had been without a ball I would certainly have turned my back on Aldo and I would have come home to you in your arms, but this is not my job, this is not the way I will go in peace with myself. I want to kill that piece of shit Hitler with my own hands and then death will be free to take my breath away.
I know what you think doll, my philosophy is horrible and blinded by anger. But I’m the bear jew after all, I’m an animal and you fell in love with a beast.
I only want you to know that you will never be alone, you will not get rid of me so easily sweetness, my spirit will always protect you and whenever the pain will dominate you even if you do not see me feeling free to shout to the sky all the anger that try, I will listen to you and console you. I promise you.
Tell my family that I love them and my father that he will have to look for another young barber to run his salon.
Never forget me, doll.
Goodbye. “
- Donovan Donowitz
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HUGO STIGLITZ
“ I was hoping to never write you this letter (y/n) but if you don’t see me coming home within a month, then know that I died fighting.
I died for my ideals and died without fear.
Your mother was right to tell you that she didn’t like me at all and she was right, you fell in love with a monster.
Yet you have always been stubborn, you risked your life because of my position. I am a criminal, a traitor, an assassin, the Nazis want my head as a hunting prize. But this does not push you not to love me. That’s probably why I feel affection for you.
Although he has always confirmed to you that there was no future with me, I could never have given you a family, not even married you, you know that I don’t believe in God. A God who loves his children would never allow this.
Also on this you have always had to repeat, you said that if all this happened it was probably because it was destined to happen, even if all this seems a macabre nightmare.
Ugly stubborn girl.
I never told you in person, but maybe if I don’t do it now, I’ll probably regret it even in the underworld.
I love you, (y/n)
Take care of yourself. “
- Hugo Stiglitz
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WILLHELM WICKI
“ Hi sunshine,
I have no idea if you are still alive, if the Germans have captured you, if your family is still alive. The only thing I regretted after leaving Austria was the fact that I didn’t have enough money to get away with me.
But even if you could you wouldn’t have done it, you’re too attached to your family …
I still remember those little moments of ours together, while helping your father at work. You, with that little girl’s face, who frowned in a very sweet pout when I made you share my jokes.
And that afternoon we spent throwing water in the garden with the hose? Oh dear, only when I savor these old memories do I realize how much I miss my baby. Because you have always been, even though I never declared myself, even though I never kissed you, I just needed a smile to make me feel at peace with myself.
Knowing that those Nazis have now torn you from your lips tears at my heart (y/n) I can’t stand the idea of seeing you locked up in some concentration camp without having a name, seeing you lying on the ground in a pool of blood and perforated by bullets, hear you scream, hear you sobbing … see you with the lost and frightened look wander in this hell.
What I want to tell you is that I’m sorry, I’m sorry I couldn’t be your mistake, I’m sorry I abandoned you. I don’t know if you’ll forgive me, but know that I’ll fight to the end to avenge the love I felt for you.
If God still exists, I beg you, answer me as soon as possible.
Below you will find an address where to deliver your letter.
Yours.”
- Willhelm Wicki
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OMAR ULMER
“ My sweet (y/n),
the only thing that makes me calm is the fact that you are safe in America. At least you’re saving yourself from the horror I found here in France. It all seems so surreal, probably the worst of the war is the fact that the wickedness of humanity overcomes every border.
Every time I close my eyes I imagine again and again our first and last exit together. We were you and me alone in that cinema, because we knew that many customers didn’t come at that night time. We had taken the best seats in the middle of the last rows, and only a big bag of popcorn was part of us, God bless those popcorn. It was at that precise moment that our fingers touched, desperate for some snacks inside that bag. Even if that room was dark, I know you saw my face go red, while I won’t be able to forget your eyes shining with a strange light. Jeez, how beautiful you were, I wanted you to kiss right now, but I know we were too shy to do it.
But time seemed to be on our side, however, we left the cinema and it was raining outside, I pulled out my umbrella and you took my arms to shelter you. We were so close that my heart would have shot away, maybe you had sensed it and it was then that you turned and kissed me. I was so stupid that I dropped my umbrella and while we were both hanging around we laughed carefree, kissing each other again and again.
My life began in that American cinema and my life will dwell in this other cinema in Paris, I will die (y/n), because a war is won with the sacrifice of us soldiers.
I know you will be crying my sweet girl, please don’t do it.
I am not afraid of dying, because I know that when I go back to sleep and this time forever, I know you will expect me in my dreams, in front of our cinema, soaked and with an angelic smile.
I will love you now and in my next lives.
Your soldier. “
- Omar Ulmer
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SMITHSON UTIVICH
“ Dear Mrs (y/n),
I’m Smithson utivich, I don’t know if you remember me.
We met at the military base in America, you were looking for your father but you found me, I would add in embarrassing conditions.
Some soldiers were making fun of me, they didn’t consider me worthy of my mission and gave me misguided names. Without fear you threw yourself into that mass of idiots like a lioness and god, I still laugh in remembering how painful they took themselves off the stage. An ordinary man would have said that it was the most embarrassing and less virile day of his life, probably, but at least I met my angel. You gave me your hand and you made me get up from the ground, and then you introduced yourself. I never had the courage to tell you, but your name is something poetic and at the same time a badass. Like an Amazon.
I took you to your father, but then as a fool I didn’t even dare to greet you.
Probably the Nazis are right to call me “Little Men” and probably I don’t even deserve to think I have a chance to impress you.
But know that you are the force that drives me every day to remove every scalp from every damned Nazi corpse, you are the force that taught me to drive during a chase, you are the strength that makes me grow.
And maybe who knows? I will really die with the same tenacity with which you presented yourself to me. Maybe you won’t remember me as Little Men, but as Smithson Utivich.
ps. in case i returned would you do me the honor of going out with me?
