Oh can you do like an expansion of the Celestiall Peter werewolf Bucky and dragon Tony. Like its Halloween and they're talking about what bullshit it is for people to dress up when any other time they'd be scared of what they go dressed as. I love those 3 together. Oh and a Rhodey cameo!!
I think this means as an extension of a story I wrote for my AO3 awhile ago in which the boys all went to uni and lived in the same house called Bad Habits (were you the person who posted a comment on one of my stories the other day? Anyways). You won’t need the original story for context for this! Just know Tony/ Peter Q/ and Bucky are a thing. This is a long boi, prepare!
*
“Can I use you as a costume?” Peter asks and Bucky glares so hard at him Tony thinks its a wonder he didn’t fall over dead. And Peter wasn’t even talking to Bucky.
“I’m a dragon, not a costume,” he says.
“You know with all those ads about humans not dressing up as caricatures of other cultures someone is really missing the opportunity to also throw out that dressing up as another species is not cool. I don’t look like a single fucking werewolf costume idiot humans sell,” Bucky snaps. Tony and Peter stare at him for a moment, not exactly surprised by the outburst by now.
Turns out he’s sensitive to Halloween as a holiday. “Yeah, so anyways can I use you as a costume?” Peter asks.
“I have had a total of three relationships with humans and all three ran off when I told them I was a werewolf and one of them tried to kill me before running. Then humans have the fucking gall to go out dressed as werewolves? I should eat them out of spite,” Bucky mumbles, glaring at the wall across from him.
“What the hell are you dressing up as to need a dragon?” Tony asks.
“Daenerys from Game of Thrones,” Peter says and Tony rolls his eyes.
“So you want me to be your dragon slave for a night?” he snaps.
Peter sighs, “the dragons like her, Tony. Its not offensive.”
He throws his hands up, “it is so and people think its fine to desecrate an entire species because I’m one of five left in the world and the only one who’s pointing out how ignorant that show is! Dragons don’t have mothers! Wait, yeah they do, but there is no mother of dragons!”
Bucky nods, “see what I mean? You owe him an apology,” Bucky tells Peter, who rolls his eyes theatrically.
“Dude, its a costume. Relax about it.”
Tony and Bucky exchange a look and turn back to Peter. “If you don’t get the hell out of my sight I’m going to light your ass on fire,” Tony tells him.
Peter, true to his being an utter dickhead, turns himself invisible because apparently celestials can do that. “Can I use you as a costume?” he asks, prompting a rather loud growl from Bucky.
*
Luis gives Peter an offended look that has Scott’s eyes going wide as he turns away a little, putting his hand in front of his face in a poor attempt at hiding himself. “That is the rudest shit I ever heard- Scott are you hearing this? You can’t just go up and ask dragons to be costumes, he’s a person, not a prop. All those ads we see about not dressing up as stereotypes of other culture but no one points out dressing up as another species is not cool,” Luis says. He takes a breath and, thankfully, Bucky cuts in before his rant can continue.
“Right? Humans hate werewolves except when they can dress up as them and claim its not offensive because they’re appreciating us or whatever. If you appreciated werewolves than you’d lobby for werewolf rights, not wear an ugly ass fake fur mask!” He shakes his head, clearly pissed off about this.
“Guys, I just want a cool costume,” Peter says, hands in the air a little.
Luis crosses his arms over his chest, “then go make one, you don’t need a dragon to make a cool costume. I’m going as a Dorito- totally inoffensive and also a delicious treat.”
“I’m offended by Doritos,” Peter says because he’s a prick. “They’re gross and taste like cardboard, and also they’re in the shape of triangles, which means they’re the product of the Devil and also the Illuminati.”
Luis turns to Scott like he’s about to give backup, which he doesn’t. “Okay you know what, get out of here with that false equivalence- you finding dumb reasons to be offended is not the same as turning a whole species into a joke for your own amusement while also ignoring the harm that comes to those creatures all for the sake of a dumb joke. Also what the hell kind of Doritos are you eating that taste like cardboard? It is not a Dorito’s fault that you don’t know how to read expiration dates or that you leave them out too long. Things get stale Quill, like your stale ass attitude and I will not tolerate this Dorito slander-”
“Ooookay,” Scott says, “someone needs to take a nap, or do some homework, or binge eat too many Skittles and throw up again. We’ll be out of your hair now,” he says, dragging Luis away.
“What? I am not doing the Skittle thing again- I learned my lesson. Scott, they need my help, humans have to do their part to-” his words are cut off by the basement door slamming shut. Tony snickers, pleased that they decided that in a house full of supernatural creatures maybe a couple humans weren’t a bad plan. Bucky had been worried Scott might try and kill him, Tony has no idea why he focused on Scott though to be fair Luis is about as non-threatening as they come, and Natasha isn’t fond of humans either but they didn’t want to be discriminatory.
Now it turns out that had been a pretty amusing choice thanks to all of Luis’ rants about everything from Romeo and Juliet to Elvish and why it was a difficult language to learn. And, apparently, why dressing up as a supernatural creature was an asshole thing to do
*
Peter looks down at Bucky, walking faithfully by his side while Tony perches on his shoulder. “You two are going to learn that humans aren’t terrible and I’m going to win this bet,” he tells them. Honestly, they both made a such a huge deal out of a fun holiday and also Peter now has the best costume ever even if Daenerys doesn’t have a dire wolf. Bucky still makes a cool piece of show authenticity even if he’s not at all happy of being part of a costume.
Bucky, as if hearing his thoughts, glares up at him. “Don’t look at me like that, humans will love you,” he says, patting Bucky’s head. Bucky growls a little and trots a little ahead of him and Peter leaves him to sulk in peace.
On his shoulder Tony reaches out and smacks him with one of scaly paws and Peter wrinkles his nose. “Don’t be like that,” he tells Tony, who promptly smacks him again. It doesn’t even hurt, like when a cat smacks you, so Peter doesn’t even know what the point of this is.
When they get inside he at least gets the recognition he deserves because hello, he has an actual dragon with his costume. And Bucky is cool also he guesses. “Where did you find a lizard that looks like that?” someone asks, smiling at Tony. He looks unimpressed by this and frankly Peter has to wonder who the hell thinks the average lizard his brown eyes and red and gold scales.
“He’s a dragon,” Peter says.
The girl in front of him snorts, “yeah, I got your costume, but what kind of lizard is he?”
Peter resists the urge to roll his eyes. “No, he’s an actual dragon. Like the species. Kinda small, but being pocket sized makes him easier to cart around all night so,” he says, shrugging. Tony slaps him again, clearly annoyed with the comment on his size but Peter can’t help that Tony fits in the hoods of his sweaters and when he’s not being a dick he thinks being carried around in there is fun.
“Aww, you’re so cute!” she says, reaching out to touch him and Tony, predictably, smacks her hand away. Bucky makes his presence known by shoving himself between Peter and his current companion in what he thinks is a bad attempt to defend Tony but whatever. Peter takes a step back though.
“You don’t pet dragons, oils on human’s skin doesn’t react well to their scales,” he says. At least, he thinks, Tony didn’t decide to start screaming like he usually did when people tried to pet him. And what is with that? He’s a damn lizard, not a cat, you don’t pet lizards. Well okay, some lizards are fine with it but still.
“Well you got him up there somehow,” she says.
This time he does roll his eyes, “I’m not human.” Being a celestial means he can avoid damaging oils and also that he can work as a heat lamp for Tony. He had tested that on a whim and it worked so that was pretty cool, not that it comes in handy now.
“Then what are you?” she asks, squinting like she can tell just looking at him. Bucky growls, hackles raised and honestly the question is annoying but not worth the growl. Peter flicks his ear and Bucky whirls on him unimpressed.
“A celestial,” he says.
“The hell is a celestial?” she asks.
He lets out a long sigh, “basically a god. Don’t look at me like that, we can build whole planets if we want to.” His asshole dad had one that was really cool before Peter found out about all his dead siblings. Bucky lets out another annoyed growl and Peter flicks his ear again. Damn werewolves, always so touchy.
“I think your dog is pissed off,” she says and Peter grabs Bucky’s snout before he does something he’ll regret in the morning.
“Not a dog, that’s a werewolf,” he says quickly. Bucky growls and Peter doesn’t let go of his mouth.
Thankfully his companion jumps back a little. “Why the hell would you bring a werewolf in public?” she asks, giving Bucky a panicked look.
Peter rolls his eyes so hard its a wonder they didn’t roll right out the door. “Because he’s a North American werewolf and they’re fucking harmless unless people say dumb offensive shit,” he says. The European brand of werewolf? Nightmare fuel, but they also know how to handle themselves. North American werewolves? Usually non-confrontational and lazy. Also very soft even if they shed a stupid amount of hair everywhere even when human. Peter has made peace with the hair and Tony’s occasional shed scale.
“Dumb offensive shit like what?” she asks. “Everyone knows werewolves eat people.”
Peter yanks Bucky back by the snout, which is probably a little mean but its either that or he eats someone out of spite and he’s going to regret that if he does it. “North American werewolves don’t eat people and even European werewolves will try for a damn deer or some shit first. That’s the dumb offensive shit I mean, along with calling him a dog. What the hell do you think werewolves look like, the shit you see on Teen Wolf?” Because they kind of look like Klingons and Peter kind of feels bad for laughing now but Bucky’s offended face had been so funny.
“Its my fault I didn’t know that,” she says and Peter squints.
“Its in literally every pro werewolf anything ever, if you didn’t know that you didn’t god damn Google it. If you’re going to spout offensive shit at least make it true. Like werewolves leave hair everywhere and yeah, they lick their ass sometimes.” Bucky yanks his muzzle free and gives him a look. “Don’t pull that shit, I’ve seen it happen.”
Bucky looks away, ears pulling back a little in shame. He might not be a dog by any stretch of the imagination but Peter is happy they at least share enough in common that their body language is basically the same, if more advanced in showing emotion in favor of werewolves.
*
Bucky curls up on Peter’s bed with Tony in his fur shivering as he tries to get warm but fur isn’t going to help him so Peter pulls him out, tucking him into his chest as his hands light up. Benefits of having godlike powers- hands that double as heat lamps. Tony stops shivering so hard and Peter sighs. “Okay, you two win. Humans are the worst and I honestly can’t believe I had to tell seven separate people that you can’t just pet dragons.” They didn’t even ask.
Bucky lets out an annoyed noise, lifting his head to glare at Peter. “Sorry so many people called you a dog and said you eat people,” he mumbles. “Mind going to get Tony some fruit? He’s been in the cold awhile.” Bucky slinks off the bed and Peter climbs into it, upping the heat going to his hands to warm Tony up faster.
When Bucky returns he’s carrying an assortment of fruits, “I told you this was a bad idea,” he says and Peter nods.
“Yup. And I didn’t listen like an idiot. I maintain that I had a cool costume until humans off and ruined it by trying to pet Tony though. What is he, a cat?” Bucky snickers as he climbs into bed, shimmying close to Peter. It betrays more than his words- werewolves are tactile creatures and when they’re mad they refuse to touch each other. Its kind of funny to watch them all get mad and avoid contact like they’re all repelled by each other.
Still, if Bucky isn’t avoiding contact he’s not that mad at Peter. “Here,” Bucky says to Tony, extending a grape towards his mouth. Tony takes the grape gleefully, destroying it in seconds. Bucky hands him a strawberry next. “I didn’t know you knew that much about werewolves,” he says as Tony destroys another berry. Jesus he eats those things fast.
“Yeah, I Googled them. Not that hard,” he says. Phrase of the fucking night- he swears he explained the most basic of shit to people like twelve times over.
“The difference between North American werewolves and European werewolves isn’t information that’s easy to find. Most don’t even make a distinction anymore,” Bucky murmurs. He hands Tony some pineapple and Tony pulls his head back. Bucky rolls his eyes and eats it himself, handing Tony a piece of watermelon that he happily takes instead.
“Yeah, because European werewolves were hunted to near extinction during witch trials in Europe. Seems kind of stupid considering it was never werewolves starting genocides and lighting people on fire. Except that one time in South Africa but that didn’t go well,” he says. Bucky frowns and he sighs, “I got stuck in a Googling suck hole. Did the same with dragons. Its how I figured out the hands thing,” he says, jostling Tony a little and earning a sharp yell for it. “Don’t be rude,” he tells Tony.
Bucky moves in closer, wrapping an arm around Peter. “That’s so sweet. Don’t ever convince me to be a Halloween costume again.”
Peter snickers, “next year I’ll let you eat people and Tony can light them on fire then we cal all fuck off to a planet I’ve made,” he says.
Bucky frowns, “can you even do that?”
Peter shrugs, “I’ve got a year to figure it out.”
Bucky looks at Tony, who happily takes another grape from his fingers. “Pretty sure he’ll be fine as long as there’s fruit.”
“Well, considering ninety percent of his diet is fruit yeah, I’d say so. I should try and make new fruit, that would be cool,” he says, grinning. Tony looks up at him, eyes wide with excitement and he laughs. “Guess I have a new botany project.”
“Well, so long as you stop pissing off the neighbors with plants that flip them off,” he says. Rude, Peter thinks those are fun and their neighbors are a bunch of uptight assholes.
