The Era Of Hipsters. By Lazy Larry. Fat Boi Studios. A Critical Thinking Production. Chapter 1 Part 5 Warning:Hi yeah you the reader. This is humor ok dark comedy to some crap to others. But hey how ya doin? Glad you’re here still reading. Be warned.Strong drug reference violence, language and profanity.
Tony and Matthew in front of the house sitting there parked listening to Thuggish Ruggish Bone.
“You see kid this crap just take out the C I love it. See back then everybody in my age group was like what the fuck is a Bone Thug. I like this shit now then. Forever. First of tha month and Foe tha luv of $ was the most bizarre shit I ever heard. I was on a lot of dope back then. I don’t usually say never do anything, but you know you should probably hold off on that. How old are you again ten?” Tony asks.
“Good god we ruined your life.” Tony nods. “Anyway well feel free to wait here, but if anybody comes up or you know any crooked cops just uh tell me as soon as possible.” Tony exits the car.
Tony walks in and sees Gina half naked passed out on the couch. That guy Ralph strung out on dope standing there.
“Hey bitch! Get up you got a kid to take care of hello. Remember him now get up and dressed..” Tony snaps
“Uh nuh motherfucker. That’s my hoe!” Ralph says. Ralph standing up tattooed head, and fat doughboy body stands out. He stares as he stares. Scary looking and hard to smell. He stares lifeless.
“Oh you’re one of those guys, yeah I know that guy. Look uh can we just not do this ok it’s been a long day, shit happens. Ok?” Tony says. “Look she got a kid let her do her thing ok.”
Matthew walks in and stares. “Uncle Tony the mail man walked by and now he left.”
“Oh god damn it kid why did you have to say my name and show yourself?” Tony moans. “Kid rule number one. Never interrupt a man on a mission. Ok you die you make him look like an amatuer and he takes that stuff personal.”
“Uh you said let you know if somebody came by.” Matthew nods.
“Ok go in the bathroom lock the door and cover your ears.” Tony snaps and points.
“Can I watch you punch his ticket. I’m old enough now I’m six.” Matthew whines.
“Well you know you have to learn one day that uh. You know what rule number one use all rules.” Tony turns. You’re in my prayers.” Tony says he charges and takes Ralph down the hallway and….
Mathew in front of class reading with a huge smile on his face and heart filled with joy.
“So after Uncle Tony started punching his ticket and the guy cried and whineed he did it. Hooray! I shouted. After that Uncle Tony taught me how to be a productive citizen and clean up the mess. Sloppy job is a bad job. He always says.” Matthew says he turns the page over.
This muthafucka told us how to ice a dude and how to do a great fuckin job. Ok degree level of education ice fucking job. He’s all smiling and shit and the little white girl up front looking like she gotta yack everywhere. The old bitch done left the class and came back with the principle. Then bitch ass Stanley started laughin his scrawny ass off. Oh yeah he was gettin his ass beat at recess.
