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The Lowedown: WWE WrestleMania 32 Predictions

*the site isn’t working so I’m just posting the predictions here*

Wrestling's biggest event of the year is upon us, here's what I think happens tonight at WrestleMania.

Ryback vs Kalisto for the United States Championship

My how far Kalisto has fallen in 2016. We saw Kalisto nearly steal the show at TLC, where the high flyer did his Salida Del Sol finisher off the top of the ladder, wowing the entire WWE Universe. Since then, he's become a two-time US Champion, made a name for himself as a singles competitor, had an all too lengthy feud against Alberto Del Rio, then stood around aimlessly, holding a Title that meant something this time last year, and now means so little that it's being put on the Kick-off Show....for the second straight PPV. I'm a fan of both competitors, but I, like so many other fans, could care less about what happens in this one. The story is absent minded, Ryback's entire reasoning for challenging Kalisto is because Kalisto is smaller than him, and besides, Ryback's run with a Title didn't exactly go over well, so why do we want another one so close to the last?

On one hand, I could see Ryback destroying Kalisto, taking the US Championship, and Kalisto having to spend the next two PPV's trying to climb the mountain back up to the Gold; but, then there's the other hand, where Kalisto needs to have a 'Mania moment, and handily beating Ryback, a man significantly larger than himself, would go a long way towards accomplishing that goal. I'm saying Kalisto takes a Shell Shock, blowing the minds of everyone watching, fights back just long enough to hit the Salida Del Sol, does a creative pin to get some extra leverage, and retains his Title.

Winner: Kalisto

The Usos vs The Dudley Boyz

To me, WWE really missed the boat on not having this be a Tables match or something that would allow Tables to be used legally. It'll still happen, but it won't take place until after the match has concluded, and The Usos are standing tall. There isn't a world one can imagine that sees The Usos losing this one, but the question is going to be whether or not the Dudley Boyz are the only ones who go through a table. The feud has been nonsensical, pushed back to the forefront because Bubba Ray and Devon need to be on the WrestleMania card now that they're back, but unfortunately, they're going to lose, and do so in a match that serves basically no point.

The Usos win this one, then follow it up with a Splash through both Dudley's on two tables.

Winners: The Usos

Team Total Diva vs Team B.A.D. & Blonde

This match is a good excuse to get more Diva's some screen time, but it also helps to add some drama to WWE's side project TV show. Lana suddenly taking a disliking to Brie Bella felt strange then and it still does now, but we knew Lana was probably getting in a ring at some point, so why not now? With Lana stepping between the ropes, she needs some help, seeing as how Lana didn't originally train to be an in-ring talent, so it only made sense to put her on a team, so she can still have the match, do a handful of moves, but not be required to carry anything. It's smart booking if you're wanting to put her center stage, but not have her look bad.

I don't like the matchup in general, I feel like there's not enough story to justify something like this on a 'Mania card, but it's here, it's happening. My biggest fear is that Eva Marie is going to end up getting the win, because WWE is bound and determined to have Eva be one of the faces of the division. If Eva is set to win this one, I want to see Paige go to congratulate Eva on helping the team win, only to lift up and drop Eva with the Rampaige finisher, while the rest of Team Total Diva gestures that they're kicking dirt on their comrade. If we're meant to feel some sympathy for Eva, to like Eva, having her be the odd woman out, the one none of the other Divas like, and they pick on her, might be the only way to get hardcore fans even the least bit interested.

If it's not Brie straight up getting a pinfall over Lana, it'll be Eva over either Summer Rae or Tamina.

Winners: Team Total Diva

League of Nations vs The New Day in a battle for Tag Team supremacy

Here's where things get sticky. This match was supposed to be for the WWE Tag Team Championships, but then it turned out to be for supremacy in the division...whatever that's supposed to mean. Due to the match no longer being for the Titles, you can almost guarantee a loss for New Day, which will inevitably make nearly 100k people sad as hell. There's not a soul other than the four in the LON who want to see any finish besides one that means New Day wins; but, because they can lose while still being the Champs, it's going to happen. LON are at the advantage, having four members instead of three, which will turn out to be the killing blow to New Day. LON will get the upper hand, keep it, then have to deal with a determined Big E, who will run through as many of the LON as he can, until the numbers turn out to be too much. That realization will lead Big E to his corner, where Xavier Woods will tag in, thinking he can change things in their favor, but end up being very wrong, getting taken out by a Brouge Kick, followed by a Bullhammer Elbow, where King Barrett will pin Woods, two LON members will hold Sheamus' feet down during the pin, and LON will get the victory through devious means, as expected.

Now, if we can get the entrance New Day wants to give us, it'll make up for the loss. I'll only say one word: Unicorns.

Winners; League of Nations

Intercontinental Championship Ladder Match

I either see Owens retaining in this one or Sami Zayn winning it, either way, we’re going to get that singles feud between the two of them following the biggest event of the year.

I think Stephen Amell is going to get involved, taking out Stardust, the other men will fight themselves nearly to death, and the match will end with Zayn and Owens on the ladder, hitting each other relentlessly, until one of them falls, exactly like what happened last year between Bryan and Ziggler. This time though, Zayn will come up victorious, only to have Owens once again Powerbomb Zayn on the apron right after. Zayn needs a moment, but so does Owens, and Owens doing what he does best --hurting people-- is how it should end.

Winner: Sami Zayn

AJ Styles vs Chris Jericho

We knew this was coming, it had to, there was nothing else for AJ to do at 'Mania, and for AJ's first WrestleMania, he couldn't simply be thrown into the Andre match, he needed something bigger. I wish this feud would have been built on something better than "the fans cheered for you more than me," but that's what we got. Their first three matches were okay, there wasn't anything spectacular about them, it didn't give reason for unknowing fans to suddenly get on the AJ train, but AJ's so talented that it didn't matter, fans hopped on anyhow --as evidenced by his shirt selling out in two hours the first night, then again within six hours the next day after they restocked.--

They're going to hit hard, the spots are going to be bigger, more frequent, and there shouldn't be much time spent in time wasting holds. Jericho has made this personal, so when the bell rings, I expect to see that type of fury out of each of them. AJ has this one signed, sealed, and delivered, I have no doubt there, but will AJ win with the Phenomenal Forearm, the Styles Clash, or the Calf Crusher? If WWE wants this one to be an emphatic win, I'd like to see AJ finish the match by hitting the Forearm, Jericho kicking out, AJ goes for the Styles Clash but Jericho somehow reverses it, getting AJ in the Walls of Jericho, but AJ fights to the ropes. We would then see both men showing signs of exhaustion, until AJ suddenly gets a burst of energy, hits the Clash, Jericho gets a foot on the rope to break the count, and then AJ gets fed up, drags Jericho to the middle, locks in the Crusher, and forces Jericho to tap out.

AJ needs to beat Jericho firmly, it needs to be an absolute victory, there can be no questions, no debates, AJ needs to steal the show with his performance, if for no other reason than to declare that AJ has officially arrived.

Winner: AJ Styles

Third Annual Andre The Giant Memorial Battle Royal

This match confuses me to no end, because WWE wants to get as many people on the card as possible, making some matches that should have been singles bouts into Multi-Man matches, and then they drop ten names from the Battle Royal. What sense does that make? None, it makes none, and you know it. I do think there's a bigger reasoning behind this match getting moved from the Kick-off Show to the main card, and I think it's because we will see the first two-time winner, but it won't be Big Show, who has been bound and determined to become that first two-time winner. No, it's going to be a fan favorite, one that no one expects to even see tonight: Cesaro. There have been rumblings of a very special surprise entrant and I think it's the Swiss Superman. I had initially wanted Baron Corbin to debut in this match, win it, and go on to do something meaningful, but now I think it'll come down to 20 guys from the WWE Roster.

If it's not going to be Cesaro, I see Bray Wyatt being the one to toss out Cesaro, after the Swiss Superman eliminates Braun Strowman.

Winner: Cesaro

Becky Lynch vs Sasha Banks vs Charlotte for the Diva's Championship

This match has the possibility to be the match, the one fans remember forever, and it needs to be handled as such. Remember the feeling --for those who tuned in-- you got from watching the NXT Takeover Fatal 4-Way? Or at NXT Takeover Unstoppable, when Becky and Sasha went to war? That's what we're in for tonight, that's the level of match I'm anticipating, and I don't think I'll be let down. There's what I want to happen and what I think will happen; what I think will happen is Charlotte retains, setting up a debut match tomorrow on RAW, where Bayley shows up, challenges Charlotte, and wins, pulling a Paige from two years ago.

I could certainly imagine Becky winning, because Becky could arguably use the Title more than anyone. Sasha doesn't need it, but deserves it, Charlotte has had it but hasn't done a whole lot with it, so why not give it to the one that isn't getting the fan fair that the other two are getting?

What I want to happen though, is for Sasha to hit a big move on Becky, knocking the Lass Kicker out of the ring, locking the Bank Statement on Charlotte, making the Champ tap, and ending the biggest Diva's match of all time on the highest note possible, followed by trashing the Diva's Championship Title on RAW, and bringing back the Women's Championship. That's my most ideal situation and I hope it happens.

Winner: Sasha Banks

Dean Ambrose vs Brock Lesnar (with Paul Heyman) in a No Holds Barred Street Fight

This is going to be the craziest match that doesn't include run-ins. I'm not convinced that Ambrose will be able to use the bat or the chainsaw, but if he does, it would continue Lesnar's trend of bleeding for big matches. This is designed to make Ambrose, to catapult The Lunatic Fringe to the next level, and make anyone who doubts it believe that Ambrose is fully capable of being a face of the company candidate. I don't see him winning though.

Lesnar is going to win, there's little reason for me to believe otherwise, but if Ambrose can give Lesnar the fight of his life, then we might see Lesnar give respect to the first wrestler Lesnar destroys. Imagine seeing Lesnar helping Ambrose to his feet, shaking his hand, and leaving the ring; really picture that. That's the image I want to see after their match, the way I want it to end. If that were to happen, the entire WWE Universe will believe Ambrose is capable of nearly anything --if they don't already,-- and Ambrose will be well on his way to being a mainstay for years and years to come.

I see Ambrose fighting from behind, looking like he might actually beat Lesnar, as The Beast Incarnate is bloody and crawling, when suddenly Lesnar hops to his feet, hits an F5 through a table, and pins Ambrose.

Winner: Brock Lesnar

Roman Reigns vs Triple H for the WWE World Heavyweight Championship

Poor Reigns, the guy can't win no matter what he does, but to say you've been in the main event or at least the co-main event two years in a row, that's a rare thing for anyone of any era. This is the last run for Triple H, the last time we see him with the Gold, the last main event or co-main event for The Game, but it's likely only the beginning for Reigns. The hardcore fans are going to boo, at least most of them, which is why this might not headline, WWE might push it down a slot or two on the card to avoid ending the show on a perceived negative note.

It's difficult to have your main event or the Title match be one in which everyone knows the finish, that the Champion will absolutely be dropping the Title; so keep that in mind when the match starts winding down and we see a pin. There's a significantly large chance we'll see Triple H find a way to win, just to swerve fans, only to end up having Shane --if he wins his match-- pit Triple H against a random name --which could be Reigns again-- on RAW, and Triple H drops the Title on the RAW after 'Mania. We haven't seen the Championship dropped on an episode of RAW --not the big Gold Belt-- in I don't know how long, at least a decade. They don't do it anymore, it hasn't really happened since the heyday of the Attitude Era. Doing something like that would be monumental, it would be the biggest moment of 2016, especially if it happens against someone completely unexpected --Bray Wyatt anyone?--

I'd love to say WWE will do something unprecedented, but I would imagine the plan is in place, it hasn't been adjusted, and Reigns will win an incredibly hard fought match, finally getting his 'Mania moment, and not having it stolen away by anyone. If it's going to be Reigns, I want to see something big happen in the process, something like Reigns turning heel or at least coming off heelish. The fact the match got changed to a No DQ means there's something up their sleeves, we're going to see a run-in, we'll see weapons, and someone is getting busted open. If Reigns could end up having The Rock run-in to try and help, only for Reigns to Spear Rock because Reigns doesn't want help, it would be successful in accomplishing that heel(ish) goal. Reigns is going to be Champion sometime very soon, so why not have it be at 'Mania, why not have it be in a way that makes fans happy or at least okay with how it goes down?

Winner: Roman Reigns

Shane McMahon vs The Undertaker in a Hell In A Cell match with RAW ownership on the line

I've debated long and hard about whether or not I think this will go on last, but in the end, I think it only makes sense for it to. I'm patently against the Title not headlining the Show of Shows, but when the stakes are as high as they are in this match, a Title doesn't seem as important. We're going to see Shane compete in a HIAC match, against The Undertaker, with RAW's leadership on the line, and Taker's WrestleMania career. I'm sorry, but the career of one of the biggest icons this industry has ever seen, combined with ownership of RAW, dwarfs the importance of a Championship that will be won and lost at least once more this year.

That said, the HIAC is also where we'll see WWE pull out all the stops, bringing in legends, current roster members, all to help sway things in one direction or the other; plus, there's practically a guaranteed moment that Shane will defy gravity, the laws of physics, and death itself. I'm expecting at least one run-in, not naming names, but if we get it, the WWE Universe will simultaneously crap itself.

This year's match doesn't have the weight behind it that the Taker vs Lesnar match, because we've seen Taker lose now, it's now an actual possibility. Which is why I can't outright declare that Taker is going to win, that there's no way Shane wins, because he might, he actually might. Can you imagine Shane enlisting the help of a certain name or names, which ends up being too much for Taker, allowing Shane to get the pin? That could happen and just might.

How does this one end? That's the most iffy part of all of this. It's the most unpredictable match, because when you think about it, Taker couldn't possibly lose his career to Shane, could he? But, Shane couldn't lose this match after saying RAW has been in the dumps and isn't a good product anymore, which is why he wants to save it --after also giving reason for why it's not doing as well as in the past,-- could he? WWE painted themselves in a corner, one that I don't know how they escape from, not unless something extra is done on RAW tomorrow night, which wouldn't completely shock me. That's why I think Taker wins this match, Shane goes out on RAW, challenges Vince to one more match, one more opportunity, caters to Vince's pride, that Vince is so confident, what does he have to lose, and Vince agrees, which is when Shane does in fact get control of RAW. That way Shane still ends up with control, Taker is still competing, and everyone is happy.

Winner: The Undertaker

That’s The Lowedown on WrestleMania 32, thanks for reading, let me know what you think will happen by voting in the polls, and remember to watch more wrestling!

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The future is bright and full of suplexes!

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