where do you think it went wrong? (dismp)
Perhaps when I thought it was worth it to try?
No, no, I - I shouldn’t say that. It matters that I tried. Even if my failure was predestined, it mattered that I tried.
Maybe if I keep telling myself that, I’ll believe it.
I don’t know if there was a particular point where it went wrong. I keep turning it over and over in my head, picking it apart, finding new flaws and new weak points and new chances for failure. If it didn’t go wrong where it did it would’ve gone wrong in a million other ways, so who’s to say it even “went wrong” at all? Doesn’t that imply a world in which it could’ve “gone right”? I don’t think that world exists.
At least I tried. I hope that matters. I don’t know what else I have left.
