Summary: For the first time since the dawn of creation, Aziraphale and Crowley get to enjoy some of the holiday delights London has to offer.
Rating: Teen
Word count: 10,640
Status: complete
About: canon-compliant, holiday-themed. Since Yule-themed fics are a particular place of comfort, I think it'll be best if you know what you're in for here:
Chapter 1 is made out of fluff and packed with so many Yule tropes it can put any Hallmark movie to shame; it can be read as a oneshot if you want just the fuzzy feelings.
Chapter 2 is soft hurt/comfort.
Chapter 3 is a bittersweet post-s2
Snippet:
‘You really are no good at this,’ the angel reflected with endeared amusement, still casually skating backwards right in front of his dear companion.
‘Shut up,’ the demon grunted. ‘Just leave me alone, okay?’
‘Very well,’ said Aziraphale with a polite nod.
But as soon as he began withdrawing his hand, Crowley reached out in a panic and gripped tightly onto the disappearing point of support. The angel chuckled soundlessly and held his precious demon’s both hands in his palms.
‘Why don’t I teach you a bit?’ he offered tentatively.
‘I’ll… I’ll be fine,’ Crowley muttered with embarrassment, but his fingers clasped tightly around Aziraphale’s clearly stated otherwise. The angel said nothing, simply granting him a warm, though slightly sardonic smile. ‘Ugh. All right.’
Aziraphale’s face immediately lit up brighter than Bruce back in his bookshop. He continued skating backwards and holding Crowley’s hands and began giving patient instructions.
Continue reading on AO3...
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the
Organization for Transformative Works
As a bonus, enjoy a colouring page of the companion art above. Please do not erase my signature ot tamper with the linework (recolouring is okay). If you share your finished work, please credit me and ideally link back to this post).
Dieter's First Yule | dieter bravo x non-binary!reader x din djarin | wc: 4.5k | read on ao3
summary: Dieter takes a giant step in his relationship, and a giant leap for his recovering heart, when he accepts yours and Dins invitation to celebrate Yule together.
tags/warnings: alternate universe, fluff, touch of angst (it's me y'all, i can't help it), dieter's pov, some tense switching, exposition out the wazoo, brief mention of a past overdose, mentions of a divorce, mentions of drug and alcohol abuse, meet-cute, a special guest appears, brief anxiety, dieter hates ashton kutcher send tweet, mando'a pet names and terms of endearment, established polyamory, din wielding an ax, ale drinking, more special guests, run-on sentences give me life, some bow-chika-wow-wow-esque shenanigans, but nothing explicit, not beta read, i cried writing the end lol
reader description: reader is non-binary and described as having curves, and there's some descriptions of clothing and accessories, but that's really it babes - the rest is up to your beautiful imagination(s)
dividers by me
a @dieterbravobrainrotclub Secret Santa exchange gift for @perotovar - hi my love, tis I your Secret Santa! 🎅 I hope my silly anon messages were entertaining enough while I was working on this. I SO wanted to have this finished earlier, but Dieter had a lot more to say than I originally thought. 😅 I hope you enjoy this silly, fluffy (with a touch of angst), borderline crack-fic AU written straight from my heart to yours. I was ECSTATIC when I found out I would be your secret santa, you have been such a great friend (despite my lacking communication skills) and the greatest cheerleader when i come to you with any fic ideas or kinky thots that pop into my mind and I hope this fic can help convey just how grateful I am to have you in my life! ❤️ I took some different Yule traditions and legends I had found and mixed them together to create the town celebration, and I so hope it reads well. This is also in a way an ode to a pairing I never would have been obsessed with if it weren't for your fantastic mind - Dieter x Din, and I had to make them poly. AND I couldn't resist writing Grogu and Dieter. I hope you had a joyous Yule and a bountiful feast, here's to many more my friend 🫂🥰
Tucked away in the northernmost valley of Washington lies the quaint mountain town of Mandalore. A place rich in community where the people, most often referred to as Mandalorians, value honor, tradition, and the seasonal festivals within the Wheel of the Year. A charming little town currently coming closer and closer into view as the airport taxi crawls closer to its outer limits before coming to a stop.
The crisp chill of the air bites at Dieter's nose as he steps out of the dry warmth of the cab, his barely worn leather boots crunching into the thin layer of freshly fallen snow; it's here, the first day of Winter.
The solstice, you would remind him, and along with it Yule— a celebration that honors the rebirth of the sun, where people come together in merriment to feast and rejoice in the promise of more light, hope, and new beginnings.
A celebration that you and Din so graciously invited him to without a second thought, so easily extending the reaches of the generosity the two of you have already shared with him within the last eight months Dieter has known the both of you.
If anyone had asked Dieter this time last year where he would be spending the holiday season he would have rolled his eyes and walked away, grumbling under his breath something trite and sadly cliched such as "probably at the bottom of the finest bottle of cognac," or "lost in a coke fueled haze," or even the all too mature response of "balls deep in your dad while your mom watches in the corner."
That last quip landed him in the hospital for a short stint after some drunken asshole thought it best to sort his feelings out via fist to Dieter's mouth.
Nothing new for the Oscar winning actor though, that moment was just another notch in that increasingly shitty year since his divorce had finalized.
Things with Anika… well, they just didn't work out. It was a whirlwind romance bred from hero worship; his guardian angel saving him from an accidental overdose. But that's all it sizzled out to be— a flash in the pan, too much too fast, and by the time it was all over Dieter was… lost.
And the drugs and alcohol were all too enticing.
"BREAKING: DIETER BRAVO GOES ON BENDER, AGAIN!"
Splashed across every tabloid, a headline on every news station almost every week. Day by day someone new would drop out of Dieter's life. Some left quietly, without warning. Others thought it best to throw every wrong doing back in his face, as if he were unaware of his own actions. At the end of the day it didn't matter how they left, they left all the same— one by one until there was no one left in his corner.
Dieter couldn't even blame them, he envied them. If it was possible, he would have left him behind too.
After he was released from the hospital, he took some time to truly be by himself— sold his house, fucked off and booked a one-way flight to somewhere in the PNW where he could peacefully dive deeper into rock bottom and luxuriate in it. He almost convinced himself it was more comfortable by his lonesome down there, that being holed up in his own misery and self-loathing was some form of karmic retribution he was destined to live out. He very well could have lived the rest of his life that way if it weren’t for one fortuitous outing: an emergency grocery run Dieter begrudgingly took on after being blacklisted from every grocery delivery service within the area.
Turns out people don't take too kindly to a drunken middle-aged man dressed in a threadbare green robe yelling at them to "get the fuck off" his property after simply doing their job dropping off his groceries.
And he was out of mac and cheese.
One barely half-assed shower and a 30 minute cab ride to the nearest store later, Dieter had found himself squinting over his sunglasses at two boxes in his hand, stuck between the tried and true Deluxe Original Cheddar and the intriguing Pepper Jack promising a "subtle jalapeño kick." He continued to weigh his options, about to throw both of them in his cart when he felt a small thud against the lower half of his leg, followed by the tiniest oof echoing from below him.
He looked down and was frozen on the spot. He didn't remember dipping into his stash of mushrooms before heading out, but tripping balls could have been the only explanation for what Dieter had been looking at in that moment.
A small frog-like creature? No, it looked nothing like a frog save from its green skin and giant black eyes. And it was wearing clothes. Clothes that looked specifically made for the little thing; a tiny black knit jumper featuring a- oh, a frog, how hilarious, a pair of black trousers that looked so cozy Dieter started to wonder where he might be able to find some of his own, and a little yellow knit hat that had to have held no purpose besides being adorable because the poor things ears were way too big to fit under. Wait, no, Dieter was wrong, there were slits in the hat specifically to fit around its ears. If that didn't make his heart grow just a tiny fraction bigger.
This…thing continued to stare back at him, almost as if it were also trying to figure Dieter out, its head cocking to the side as it conducted its own exploration of Dieter's features, looking at him from head to toe. A puzzled expression as if this thing found Dieter familiar, but confusing.
"Grogu! Where did you wander off to this time? I told you, we don't have any more room in the pantry for a tenth bag of parmesan goldfi- oh there you are!"
And then there you were. A somewhat flustered thing dressed in various textures of all black, the different fabrics highlighted your curves in ways that had Dieter gripping the macaroni boxes even harder in hopes his usual smart, and incredibly filthy, mouth wouldn't scare off the first person that had intrigued him in a long time.
You bent forward, scooping the creature up and cradled it in your arms as if it was the most normal thing in the world. Perhaps it was, maybe Dieter was the one out of touch. He had spent a better portion of his time up until that moment blasted out of his mind in one way or another, perhaps these little beings, Grogu you had called it, were normal in this part of the country?
Either way, he couldn't keep his eyes off of you. The way you fussed over the thing in your arms, fixed its clothes as you chastised it for running off, the various rings on your hands glinted in the fluorescent light of the store, the chipped black polish on your nails took hold of his interest even more— was it a by-product of working with your hands, or an insight to a possible nervous habit you were trying to kick?
It wasn't until his gaze traveled to your face that he realized you had been talking to him. A poorly hidden smirk twisted your features when you caught him staring. He felt a long forgotten heat creep up his neck as he cleared his throat, slightly embarrassed.
"I'm so sorry, I didn't catch that."
Your eyes, so gentle, softened even more when you smiled at him.
"I said, I'm sorry about this little guy running into you. Hopefully he didn't bother you too much."
He shook his head, working up the courage to introduce himself when a hulking figure rounded the corner right behind you, placed a hand on your hip, and presented what looked like a pre-prepared meal for four in front of you.
"Cyare, what about this for dinner?"
Cyare, was that your name? If so, it was fitting, a uniquely beautiful name for a uniquely beautiful person.
Your eyes never left Dieter's when you responded, "that looks delicious, my love."
Ah, of course you already had someone. Dieter gave you a slight nod as he stepped back towards his cart, he was just about to turn around when you continued.
"But don't you think that might be too much for just the three of us, Din? Maybe we should invite our new friend over for dinner?"
With that you looked up to this other man, Din, as he in turn gave you a puzzled look.
"What new friend?"
"This new friend," you held a hand out gesturing towards Dieter, the little one in your arms babbled joyously at the suggestion.
Dieter froze in his spot once more, not really knowing what to do. Were you punking him? Did that annoying show get green-lit again? Was that bastard Ashton Kutcher about to pop out, or did they get someone new and equally as terrible to host this reboot? The lights in the store suddenly felt too bright, Dieter's clothing felt a tad too tight, and he had a fleeting thought that maybe chucking the boxes of macaroni at the family of three before him might be a reasonable enough distraction for him to make his escape, but then your voice sounded out once more, mooring him to his spot.
"I mean, c'mon ner kar'ta, it's not everyday you get to dine with your doppelganger."
Din finally looked at Dieter, really looked at him, Dieter doing the same. The man beside you was most definitely taller than Dieter was, a bit more broad in stature, but there was no denying the many similarities between the two. Even their names were similar; obscure and starting with a "D."
He wasn't certain what possessed him to speak, but he couldn't help it when he shared, "I-I'm, uhm, I mean, well- my name is Dieter, by the way."
Your eyes widened just a fraction in delight, Din murmured a noise caught somewhere between bewilderment and wonder, and Grogu clapped his tiny palms together as if he had won a prize.
"Well," you started, "what do you say, Dieter? If it makes you feel more at ease, you can bring over some mac and cheese."
And that's exactly what he did.
You and Din took a chance on this physical embodiment of a scared, wet raccoon with his defenses up, and in turn Dieter took a chance on opening himself up again. Little by little, each day he got to hang out with you two, he felt more and more like he was coming home to himself. You opened your hearts, home, and relationship to him, unknowingly helping him repair pieces of himself he thought might forever remain fractured.
Yet now, as Dieter stands before your door, that worry that lives in the recesses of his mind claws its way to the forefront. Sure, eight months is a good amount of time to figure out if someone is worth keeping in your life, but… what if you and Din are still deciding? What if this invitation to celebrate Yule with your town is some kind of… test? Not that he believes you or Din are in any way cruel enough to put him through something like that, but… he's had longer relationships disintegrate over less. Maybe they just weren't as strong as what he believes he has with you and Din. Just maybe.
"Welcome back home!"
Dieter drops his bag in time to catch you in his arms, his chuckles turning into a sigh as he holds you closer to him, breathing in your scent— orange and clove. Your warmth enveloping his senses and wrapping around his heart. Home. The sentiment not lost on him as he squeezes you tighter.
"Come, come, let's get you out of the cold," you laugh as Dieter shoves his chilled nose into the warmth of your neck.
You grab his bag from the snow before he can even make an attempt to get it himself and take him by the hand over the threshold, leading him into the effortlessly cozy abode. You gently grab his chin, guiding his lips to yours for a kiss, melting into him for a moment before leaning back.
"We missed you, Dee. Din and I are so glad you were able to make it back in time to celebrate with us."
His breath hitches, the ease in which you can be so sincere and open with him never fails to catch him by surprise. He had missed you too, all three of you. He just had some loose ends left in California that he had needed to take care of; closing that chapter of his life and wiping the slate clean in a way, making way for this new, and maybe even the best, chapter to come.
"I'll take your things to the bedroom. You know the drill, go make yourself cozy. You can dress down if you want, but just warning you we'll be heading back out in the snow once Din is finished, which should be soon."
Your voice fades slightly as you bring Dieter's stuff to the bedroom the three of you will be sleeping in, Grogu getting his own room of course. The guest room is always there if Dieter ever wants some space of his own, but so far he's found nothing but solace in yours and Din's bed.
He walks closer to where that scent you were wearing smells stronger: the kitchen. Trays of dried orange slices sit on the stove top, while the counter is filled with jars of whole cloves, star anise, and bundles of pine. He wonders what you might need with all this, but before he can voice his question, someone interrupts his thoughts.
A tiny tapping on his shins brings Dieters attention away from the objects. Tilting his head down towards the source, his eyes lock with the giant obsidian of the baby's. Grogu's ears perk up in intrigue as he continues to tap Dieter's shins. Grogu's eyes stuck on the man's face, just like they always seem to do when Dieter visits. Before he has the chance to fight the urge, Dieter finds himself bending forwards, hands outstretched. Grogu raises his little arms in excitement, a cheerful "Patu!" exclaimed in response.
Dieter chuckles, taking the child's quirky little noise as a green light and scoops him up in his arms.
"Patu to you too, little one."
Grogu giggles, clearly thrilled as he excitedly pats Dieter's face while babbling away.
"Brrr… brrrr!"
Dieter can't help but laugh along with the kid, he's too cute for his own good. This isn't the first time the child has tapped at his face, babbling and making the very same noise, yet Dieter never questioned it before. His brow furrows as he speaks.
"Are you trying to blow raspberries?"
"He's trying to say buir."
Suddenly you're right next to him, your left hand coming to gently rest in the hollow of Dieter's lower back. Your head laying on his shoulder as you bring your other hand to Grogu's face, lightly pinching his cheek, eliciting another round of giggles from the baby.
"He looks awfully a lot like your papa, doesn't he Grogu?"
You get your answer when he shrieks excitedly, patting Dieter's face again as he continues to repeat "brrr! bbfrrr!"
Dieter's heart suddenly feels like it might burst, this is all too good. What if it's too much, too soon again?
He clears his throat, trying to distract his racing thoughts from ruining this moment for him.
"So, uh, where is Din anyway?"
The smirk on your lips matched with the mischief dancing in your eyes should worry him a bit, he thinks, but it only ever excites him. You guide him with your palms on his hips towards the giant glass window of your reading nook, and points his gaze towards the forest. It takes Dieter a moment to realize what it is he's looking for, but once he does oh is he done for.
Din is a vision in a tight, thick-knit deep crimson sweater, his coat laid off to the side. His nose and cheeks dusted red, no doubt from the chill in the air, yet he wipes at his brow as if he were sweating. Peculiar, Dieter thinks before taking another moment to glance at what Din was holding in his occupied hand. The sun gleams off the silver of an ax, the reflection flashing as Din moves about, setting a log in place before he grasps his hold around the wooden handle, his shoulders moving underneath his sweater— rippling under it like the still water of a lake being disturbed by a pebble. The fabric around his arms tightening as he swings the blade back before bringing it down dead center in the log. If Dieter wasn't holding the cutest baby he's seen in the world, he would be barking like a damn dog.
It also helps when Grogu starts pounding his tiny palms against the glass, chanting "brrrr! brrrr!"as he looks out at his papa chopping wood.
You laugh sweetly, absentmindedly rub Dieter's back as you take the scene in for yourself. You turn your head towards Dieter, melting his heart even more with the way you're looking at him. As if he hung the moon for you. He can't help but think he really would if it were possible, for both you and Din, and even Grogu too. He would do anything really, for this little found family who welcomed him in with open arms.
"So the town Yule Log for the festivities tonight will be chosen by The Armorer this year, but Din and I already discussed it, and we would be honored if you would like to choose the Yule Log for our home. Only if you want to, no pressure of co-"
"I'd love to. I can't believe you would even consider me for something that seems so special, I mean…" Dieter laughs at his own ramblings, takes a moment to pause and take a breath before continuing. "What I mean is, I would be honored to."
You lean into him then, nuzzling your nose into his arm before placing a kiss there.
A rap at the window pulls yours and Dieter's attention towards it, Din there on the other side smiling and waving for the three of you to join him outside.
Your voice whispers excitedly next to him.
"Let's bundle up and join the others."
Turns out all the dried oranges, spices and greenery in your kitchen Dieter was wondering about before were all gathered for the townsfolk to peruse through and choose as decorations for their trees and Yule Logs for their own private celebrations at home. You had him help you gather everything together and bring them to the town center as Din followed behind, balancing sacks of chopped wood in his hands and Grogu in a baby harness across his chest.
Neither Dieter nor you were great at hiding your cute aggression when getting Grogu dressed in his little snowsuit.
After debating what was probably a little too long over two different logs, Dieter finally chose one he thought would be perfect for the four of you. You then ushered him back to the table where you dropped off your contributions for the decorations, pointing out different options and the many different meanings behind them: the dried citrus for happiness or prosperity, the star anise for clarity or luck, the cloves and sticks of cinnamon for wealth or abundance, the pine for strength, protection, or fertility. He also noticed other contributions that must have come from some of the others— poinsettias, holly, mistletoe, nutmeg, and cranberries.
Din joined the two of you after dropping the extra firewood off for the ceremony, making it in time to help Dieter decide on some green and gold candles for the altar back at the house. You had brought a bag specifically for this occasion, Dieter and Din laying everything in there carefully so you all could enjoy the festivities without anyone having to drop everything off at home.
"Come," Din hums, the clouds of his breath floating in the air. He grabs Dieter's hand in his, intertwining their fingers together. You loop your arm through Dieter's on his other side, smiling at the two men. Din continues, "Let's grab some ale and find Grogu a spot for the show."
"Okay wait, but if the Holly King's… 'powers' are at maximum capacity on the Winter Solstice, then how does the Oak King defeat them?"
You had tried explaining the legend of the Holly King and Oak King to Dieter before the show started, but your obvious excitement over the many different versions and interpretations of the story got the better of you ending in an information overload word vomit. Dieter wasn't complaining though, he could get lost in your ramblings for as long as you'd let him.
But now he was still a little confused.
"Okay, well, I wouldn't say the Oak King 'defeats' the Holly King necessarily. It's more of a… succession? Mmm no, not the right word… Din?"
"More like a 'handing off of the baton.' Until the Summer Solstice, that is."
"Yes exactly!" You whisper excitedly, trying to keep your conversation just between the three of you.
Grogu sits in a group towards the front with the other children of the town, while you, Dieter, and Din hang out standing towards the back of the crowd. Others are seated on the logs that were placed down for this occasion, most of them busy with their own murmured conversations.
Bo-Katan flits about the open "stage" as the Holly King, dressed in heavy green robes, wearing a crown made of evergreens and holly. The Armorer moves about directly opposite of her as the Oak King, dressed in a old brown coat and donning a helmet made of gold— specially made by The Armorer herself to represent the gold of the sun.
You continue your explanation, "you see it's more of a dance than a battle."
"Okay, but they are literally dueling with spears right now-"
"Staffs, not spears," Din cuts back in.
You giggle as Dieter rolls his eyes petulantly, his gaze returning to the play duel at the front. He can't stay quiet for too long, a smirk stretches across his lips as he turns his head towards the two of you again.
"How much you wanna bet that The Armorer is gonna end the night slinging Bo-Katan over her shoulder and whisking her away from the rest of activities early, tonight?" Dieter mutters under his breath, wagging his eyes in gesture towards you and Din.
You scoff dismissively, the ale loosening your composure in a way Dieter always finds amusing. "Oh please, we both know Bo-Katan is more likely to do the whisking away," you retort as you fix him with a stare that all but screams duh, idiot.
Before Dieter could start poking fun at your sudden attitude to rile you up even more, Din cuts in, sounding a bit annoyed when he whispers "could you both please knock it off? They're like vod to me, like sisters."
Dieter never knowing when to leave well enough alone can't help but deadpan, "Well, Din, I hate to break it to you, but your sisters are fucki- ooof."
The shock of frigid snow meeting the small sliver of skin on Dieter's belly is enough to shut him up, but the weight of Din spread across Dieters back, his arm coming around to hold Dieter in a light choke-hold, is what really turns his mind to mush, loosening his tongue once more.
"Y'know big guy, I don't think this is having the effect you were hoping for."
"Actually," Din all but croons in Dieter's ear, his weight shifting as he gently but firmly pushes his knee between Dieter's thighs, "I think I'm having the exact effect I was shooting for."
Dieter has to bite his lip to keep a pitiful whimper at bay, the small amount of ale in his system doing fuck all to keep his mind out of the gutter. But can you really blame a guy when he's got a full blown hunk pinning him to the ground?
It doesn't last long though. They hear your mischievous giggle of "it looks like you two could use some cooling off," before they feel a pile of snow being dropped on the both of them.
You bring your hands to your mouth, attempting to muffle your fits of laughter, but a snowball hitting you square in the back cuts you off. The three of you turn to find Paz Vizla and Boba Fett attempting to look unbothered and innocent, but the snow on Boba's gloves are a dead giveaway.
More snowballs start flying from different directions before everyone hears Koska and Fennec shout "snowball fight!"
Luckily the impromptu snowball fight didn't put a damper on anyone's celebration; in fact most of the townspeople joined in. The Armorer took advantage of the diversion to get the last finishing touches for the Yule Log ceremony in place, only regaining everyone's attention when Bo-Katan rang the bells set out for the band.
The night goes on as the Armorer and Bo-Katan speak some words of wisdom, and recite a poem of gratitude honoring the return of the sun and the longer days that come with it before lighting the Yule Log together in front of everyone in the town as they cheer.
The band takes their place around the fire and starts up their joyous melody, a spirited tune to celebrate the resilience of the people and their hope during these darker months.
And it suddenly occurs to him.
Dieter thought that true love would hit him like a freight train, that when people said "you know when you know" it meant it was loud in its arrival; a howling, shrieking thing that made sure its presence was known.
And maybe in some cases that's true, maybe that's how it is for others.
But for him? It's this moment right here. A quiet warmth, wrapped up in the embrace of his two lovers— you snuggled in his arms as Din envelops the both of you in the wide breadth of his hold. Din's face nuzzling into Dieter's hair, Dieter's hands pulling you closer into his chest. The three of you swaying in time, enjoying the sounds of the band playing and the joy of the children as they dance and laugh along. The warmth from the fire almost feels like a physical embodiment of the warmth Dieter feels whenever he's with his three favorite people. He knows now there's nothing to be afraid of with his little family here. It's not too much too soon, too good for him to deserve.
It's simply perfect, exactly where he needs to be.
Where he belongs.
tagging those who interacted with the wip post, please let me know if you would like to be removed: @kedsandtubesocks @djarins-cyare @djarinmuse @inept-the-magnificent
With Christmas fast-approaching, there's no time like the present (get it? "present"?) to remind you all that I have a very unhinged, stupidly horny royai Christmas ("Yule") fic to get you in the holiday spirit. It's called "The Madam Christmas Guide to Convincing Your Stepson to Get His Goddamn Ass In Gear" and it contains such gems as the snip below:
Linked here for your convenience:
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the
Organization for Transformative Works
Running into the woods was never a good idea, much less in the middle of the night, with snow all around. There was also the fact that Tony couldn’t see shit, but hey, impulsive decisions led to shitty situations. At least the weather was nice.
Pairings:
Tony Stark x Krampus!Reader
Words:
Warnings:
Mild Smut
Author's Note:
I was thinking of what to write for Yule; then my gremlin mind was like Krampus!reader. Idk when this is set; let’s just say Tony is alive, he’s thriving, and so is everyone else, except Thanos, fuck him. Other people write fluffy Christmas fics; I, on the other hand, write atrocities like this. Originally this was going to be a naughty or nice kinda fic (if you catch my drift) the I remembered Krampus was a thing and bam! Also I have no idea where this was going but anywho. Enjoy :)
A particular type of curiosity came when one was being watched; for Tony, it came from being a billionaire, then Iron Man, then part of the Avengers. Much of it also came from his love life, or rather lack thereof; being a playboy didn't exactly lend itself to any meaningful relationships. Sometimes he’d hope the person/s he slept with would stay behind, that he’d wake up to find them still there; the closest he ever got to anything like that was with Pepper, but that had barely blossomed before being nipped in the bud. The city didn’t help either; there was still some loneliness despite being surrounded by people. He’d briefly shared these thoughts with Rhodey, who, in turn, suggested Tony take a break from everything. Get away from everything.
His choice had been his family’s old cabin in the Alps, excellent location, skiing, snow, just relax. He’d practically left in the next hour, leaving behind a message of ‘DO NOT DISTURB,’ and with only a handful of people with the knowledge of his plans, he was off. Ten hours and twenty-seven minutes later, and he was in Switzerland; another hour later, and he was standing in the cabin’s foyer, grimacing at the dust gathered everywhere.
Tony dropped his luggage off in the master bedroom, flopping down onto the bed caused a duststorm to encase him, leading to the most irritating sneezing storm he’s ever had. The first order of business; clean-up. As he began the dusting, he took note of the empty kitchen, the second order of business; food. Once Tony was satisfied with his cleaning, he moved on to the food portion of his to-do list; with J.A.R.V.I.S’ oh so lovely input, he had a grocery delivery system set up for his stay, which looked to be up until after New Year’s. The temptation to join the others back in New York was there, but he found it far more appealing to look over the scenery.
Back to the start, the whole being watched thing was something Tony was accustomed to, which is why he almost didn't react to it when he felt like he was being watched. Almost. But after two days of the feeling, he grew sick of it and decided to investigate; by that, he meant sending out a few smallscale drones to do the investigating. The first few came back with nothing notable- a few animals here and there, the occasional person skiing down the mountains - but then he opened the last one and nearly had a heart attack. A prominent dark figure encompassed the image, its form appeared to be running, and as Tony flipped through more of the pictures, he realized it was running at the camera. The last photo was too close for him to make out much, other than a pair of golden eyes.
The drone was in tip-top shape, practically unharmed. Now Tony’s not saying he believes there’s some kind of cryptid thing somewhere in the mountains; he’s a man of logic. So, logically he brushed it off as someone messing around. Promptly, he yelled out his lungs at the mystery person - who might’ve been the one watching him, and if so, by all accounts, this was an idiotic move - he assumed was out in the forest until he was satisfied, and he thought that was that.
Then the gifts (?) started showing up.
If he could even call them gifts, but what else would you call a dead deer on your doorstep? There was also the chopped firewood, snow constructions, wood carvings; if Tony didn’t know any better, he’d say he had an admirer. An admirer who was good at staying hidden. At best, all he could get from security footage was a fast blur here and there. Whoever was leaving him this stuff barely ever got close to the front of the cabin, taking care to keep themselves away from being seen. According to J.A.R.V.I.S, an admirer who may be a stalker and/or possibly, improbably, also be something of a cryptid. Pepper hadn’t been much help either, citing that Tony may be the subject of a werewolf’s affections if her numerous romance books were anything to go by.
“Werewolves aren’t real.”
“Tony, you’re on a team with a literal god and a giant green humanoid, and you don’t think werewolves are real?” Pepper asked in disbelief.
“Who cares about that?! The point is, I’ve got someone leaving me things, and I don’t know what to do about it!” he exclaimed.
“Why don’t you set up one of the suits to get better footage?” Pepper suggested, “Or better yet, come back before whoever this is hurts you.”
“I’ll be fine; besides, who’s stupid enough to take on Iron Man?”
After that, he’d taken the first suggestion, not only using the suits but also the drones. Once he was done, every inch of the cabin’s exterior and nearby forest was under surveillance. Even then, it took two days before he got an answer, but it wasn’t from all that. No, Tony got a live response in the form of two glowing eyes staring at him from outside the kitchen. Naturally, seeing that, he screamed, dropped his glass of wine, and sent out a suit in his stead to confront whatever was out there.
The eyes disappeared as soon as a suit touched down; the sound of thrusters was in the air for a bit before there was silence. Tony found himself standing near the back door, ready to gear up and go himself when he spotted the suit. It was leaned back on a tree, completely unharmed, with ice creeping up its bottom half. Officially, this situation had gone from mildly inconvenient to somewhat slightly terrifying. He was ready to book it to the nearest plane when he caught sight of the eyes again. They appeared almost hesitant; there was a low rumble before the eyes yet again vanished, and against all better judgment, Tony ran in that direction.
Running into the woods was never a good idea, much less in the middle of the night, with snow all around. There was also the fact that Tony couldn’t see shit, but hey, impulsive decisions led to shitty situations. At least the weather was nice.
Of course, as expected, Tony lost his footing, tripping over a branch and nearly sending himself falling off a rather cliff. Though that never happened, a hand shot out and grabbed the back of his shirt, bringing him close to a solid body. Tony glanced up, his eyes meeting the now-familiar golden ones; he squinted his eyes to get a better look at the face. He could vaguely make out horns, pointed ears, and a set of rather sharp teeth from the slightly open mouth.
“Hello,” the stranger’s voice was deep and sent a shiver up Tony’s spine.
Your head tilted to the side as he curiously observed Tony, chuckling lowly as he breathed out a response. “Apologies for the disturbance; it’s been ages since anyone’s been up this side of the mountains.”
“Uh, it’s no trouble, I just didn’t expect to meet,” Tony gestured at you, mimicking horns on his head and fangs, “whatever you are.”
“Most humans know me as Krampus; I deal with the naughty children during this time of year,” you explained.
“So, Santa with horns?”
You sighed, “I suppose, except I don’t do presents. Sometimes I eat naughty children, and if I’m feeling generous, drag them kicking and screaming to hell.”
Tony would’ve taken that as a cue to turn tail and run, where the words not said with a low growl that had his mind supplying rather, shall we say, explicit thoughts. Now, he’s met a lot of people who tickled his fancy. Still, he’s never given being a monsterfucker any thought - then again, the average person probably doesn’t unless you read fanfiction like this, but I digress - but being this close to you was starting to give him some ideas.
“Then why all the, um, stuff around the cabin?” he asked.
“What else is one to do when faced with a vision of beauty?” you replied, pulling him closer. “If they are unwelcome, I can stop.”
There were barely any thoughts running through Tony’s head as of now, at least any useful ones. He stumbled through his words for a bit; he could practically feel the blush rising as you amusingly laughed at his predicament. At this point, he was probably running more on instinct than thought as he flicked your nose, earning him an amused huff.
“Careful,” you warned, “I might find you adorable, but in no way does it prevent me from devouring you.”
Ok, if he wasn’t blushing before, he most certainly was now, “What’s stopping you then?” he dared.
Without warning, he found himself held up by the waist, feet off the ground, and his face level with yours. “Is that what you want, Schatz? Would you like me to ravish you?”
Like any reasonable person, Tony agreed when faced with the proposition of sex from a devilishly handsome man in the middle of the woods. Quite enthusiastically. Your grip on his waist moved to hold his thighs, settling them around your waist. Your face moved to his neck, dragging your nose along his pulse and drawing out a breathless sound from the man in your arms.
“What was that?” you asked after he murmured a response.
“T-Tony. My name. And yes, if i-it’s not too much trouble, I’d love to be ravished, right this instant,” he sputtered, “please.”
He barely finished the last word as your lips caught his, tilting your head slightly to get your tongue space to explore. After a while, you move on to his neck, open mouth kisses and small bites strewn along as Tony’s moans fill the surrounding forest. At one point, he bites his lip to silence himself, but a well-placed bite brings the sounds back. Your claws make quick work of his pants; you half-heartedly apologize before inserting one finger. Slowly but surely, you add more two more fingers, increasing the pace; you move forward to support Tony’s body. Your tail comes up to hold him as your other hand moves around to take hold of his cock.
After two orgasms, Tony’s head was slumped to the side, his breathing slightly labored. You moved him from the tree to the forest floor, positioning yourself and slowly moving forward; the head of your cock went in, causing him to whimper slightly; you muttered words of encouragement into his skin. Stopping every so often to get him used to the feeling. Once it was all in, you didn’t move; Tony breathlessly told you to proceed, you drew out and back in, again and again. The thrusts were slow at first, picking the pace to become faster until growls and moans accompanied the sound of flesh against flesh. No words are exchanged aside from the occasional ‘fuck’ here and there; your movement halts as you release a load, and soon enough, you’re collapsing on top of Tony.
You come down from the bliss to hands roaming up and down your horns, “Next time, I want to hold these while riding you.”
“Next time?” you raised a brow, head moving up to glance at him.
“I’d like to hope I’m more than just a one-off for you,” Tony commented.
“I assumed you’d be returning to your home after this,” you replied, “but if you don’t mind, I’d be happy to follow along.”
“Good.” he exhaled. “Because after that, I don’t think I’d be able to settle with anyone else. Now, if you got us back to the cabin, we could go for round two.”
End Note:
I'm not saying Tony is a monsterfucker, but like idk what else to tell you. You're welcome though for this mess. Hope you enjoyed my shite. Stay Hydrated.
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Bloodborne (Video Game)
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Relationships: Laurence/Ludwig (Bloodborne)
Characters: Laurence (Bloodborne), Ludwig (Bloodborne), Amelia (Bloodborne)
Additional Tags: Fluff, No Plot/Plotless, The boys use their words ish, Yule, Shared Backstory, Side Story, Fluff and Angst, Laurence is thirsty, Pre-Slash, but less in the sense that there's nothing going on, and more in the sense that they're refusing to address it
Series: Part 7 of Before the nightmare
Summary:
It wasn't like they could go hunting with the snow coming down so thick. Or, Ludwig and Laurence have a break on the feast-day whether they want one or not. They mostly spend it on depressing conversations and sitting closer than is polite, and even almost address subjects of import. It's something like progress.
[Falls somewhere nebulous in the Choral Composition timeline. Laurence and Ludwig can have a break from the angst mines, as a treat.]
Lambden holiday fic idea: prank gone wrong, Lambert showing his soft side in front of the other witchers.
Thanks for the lovely prompt and for spitballing with me!
Yule fluff, 1,670 words
-
Lambert had everything prepared. He had had gifts tucked away in the bottom of his pack in his room, the kitchen had been filled with ingredients for a luscious meal. He’d had Eskel keep Aiden busy while he got most of the meal ready, and now he just needed to get rid of his partner for a few last minutes in order to set everything up. The other witchers were lounging around the hearth in the main hall, drinking and sharing stories. Lambert poked his head out of the kitchen.
“Hey, Aiden?”
“Yeah Lambs?”
“Can you go check on Cinnamon for me? Give her this,” he said as he tossed some apple slices at his partner. “She can share with Sugar.”
Aiden looked at the apple slices with a smirk. “And it’s of dire importance that she gets these right now?”
Lambert scowled. “Yes, they’re her Yule treat.”
Aiden raised a brow. “Then why aren’t you bringing them to her?”
“Because I’m busy, obviously! If you didn’t ask so many damn questions you could have been back by now.”
“Alright, alright,” Aiden soothed. “I’ll bring your baby her treat.”
Lambert just glared at him before stepping back inside the kitchen. He waited until he heard Aiden go out the large keep door before grabbing the fur-wrapped bundle he’d tucked into the corner of the kitchen and rushing out to the Yule tree they’d set up, at Geralt’s bard’s insistence, near the hearth. He set the bundle under the tree, then hurried back to the kitchen to make sure everything was ready to serve.
It wasn’t uncommon for him to cook, but he’d gone all out on this meal. He’d been gathering ingredients for months before they headed up to Kaer Morhen: he’d wanted to do something special for Aiden for his first year at the keep. Lambert had wanted him there by his side for years, but hadn’t managed to find the words or the guts to ask him. But when they reunited last spring, the words had burst out of him, and Aiden had enthusiastically accepted the invitation to join him the following winter.
He wanted to make sure Aiden had a good time, that he wouldn’t regret slogging up a mountain to stay in a crumbling keep with a bunch of wolves. That he wouldn’t regret being cooped up with Lambert all winter. Sure, they’d been travelling together for years, but this was different. On the path they would sometimes take off on their own for a few days, or weeks, before reuniting. And they were travelling, taking contracts, going through towns. It wasn’t the same as being stuck in the same building with only a few others for months on end. He had to make sure it was a good experience. Now that he’d had Aiden with him for a winter, he didn’t want to face being without him for another.
Once he’d finished fussing with the plates and everything was ready to serve, Lambert poked his head out the doorway again. What was taking Aiden so long to come back?
-
After agreeing to Lambert’s errand, Aiden had thrown on his winter cloak and headed towards the stables. He was feeling a little antsy after being mostly cooped up for the last few days due to the heavy snow. He wasn’t used to the snow, but he’d seen its potential. The first day that enough of it had fallen, the three younger wolves, plus the bard, had engaged in a loud, somewhat vicious snowball fight. Aiden had quickly joined in, and they’d had a good bout of fun before it was time to go back inside to dry out and warm up.
Aiden eyed his surroundings as he approached the stables and had an idea. After giving out apple slices to all the horses, he went back out and circled round the stables. If he hid down the side and made some snowballs, Lambert would come looking for him shortly, wondering what was taking him so long. Then Aiden could ambush him with his stockpile of snowballs. Maybe they would wrestle in the snow for good measure: that would get some of his frenetic energy out. As he tried to find the perfect spot for his ambush, Aiden heard a crack from beneath his feet, and then he was no longer on solid ground. Well, shit.
-
Aiden pushed back through the door to the keep, then shoved it closed behind himself. He was shivering, and dripping, and turning rather blue.
Lambert burst from the kitchen.
“Aiden, what the fuck?”
“Would have been u-useful to know there was a c-creek behind the s-s-stables,” Aiden stuttered out.
“What the fuck were you doing behind the stables?!”
“F-finding the c-c-creek.”
Geralt snickered. Lambert shot him a glare as he passed, hurrying towards the Yule tree. He grabbed up the fur, dumping what it had been wrapped around unceremoniously onto the floor, before stalking over to Aiden and wrapping him in the fur.
“You’re turning blue, for Kreve’s sake. What were you doing?!”
“W-was gonna ambush you with s-s-snowballs when you came looking for me when I di-didn’t come back.”
“Stupid fucking cat. Tonight isn’t the night for your bullshit!” With that Lambert hauled Aiden up over his shoulder and started marching towards the stairs.
“H-hey! What’re you—hey, is that a dagger under the tree?! And a—”
“Stop looking under the tree!” Lambert growled, moving faster towards the stairs. Snickers followed behind them from the table.
Once they were in their room, Lambert set Aiden on his feet, then set to unceremoniously stripping him of his clothing.
“L-love it when you strip me, Lambs, though this is a b-bit less finesse than usual.”
“Gotta get you warmed up before you turn into an icicle,” Lambert grumbled, rubbing his partner dry with a blanket he had yanked off the bed.
“You know there’s a more fun way to w-warm me up…”
“Not now, kitten,” Lambert said, sounding exasperated and defeated.
Lambert sighed. “Nothing. It’s just. It’s all a bit ruined now.”
Aiden furrowed his brow. “What’s ruined?”
“Tonight. Dinner. Everything. I mean. Nothing. It’s not a big deal.” Lambert turned away and yanked open his drawers, pulling out a soft tunic, thick sweater and pants, woolen socks. He turned back and started pulling clothes onto Aiden, not meeting his eyes.
“Lambert, stop.” Aiden set a hand on Lambert’s arm. “I fucked something up, didn’t I?”
Lambert shook his head. “It’s fine.”
“Lambs, talk to me.” Aiden slid his hand down Lambert’s arm, taking his hand and giving it a squeeze.
Lambert sighed. “I just… I was trying to make tonight special. For you. I wanted to try to make sure that you had a good time, that you wouldn’t regret coming here with me.”
“Lambert, I would never—”
“But now dinner will be cold, and the others have probably already eaten. And your gifts are strewn on the floor and you’ve seen them…”
“Baby I’m sorry. I was getting antsy from being cooped up and I was stupid. I didn’t know what you were up to, but—”
“It’s fine.” Lambert shrugged, staring down at their feet, trying to turn away towards the door. Aiden tugged him back and pulled him into a hug.
“I would never regret coming here with you. Even if I fell into the damn creek every day,” he murmured into Lambert’s neck, “even if we ate dry travel rations for every meal. I’m just happy to be with you.”
“Sap,” Lambert mumbled into Aiden’s hair. Aiden squeezed him tighter.
“Mmm. I’m sorry I fucked up your plans.”
“S’ok. We should probably go back down, though.”
“Alright.”
-
Lambert and Aiden walked back into the hall to find the others waiting for them at the table.
“We didn’t serve anything yet, we waited for you,” Jaskier explained with a smile. “Eskel said he’d warm everything back up.”
Lambert made a noise in the back of his throat. “Meat’ll probably be dry.”
Aiden squeezed his hand. “It smells delicious.”
“It does!” Jaskier agreed.
“Sit down already so we can eat,” Geralt grumbled, but his lips ticked up in a smile.
Eskel carefully reheated the plates with igni, and Vesemir started serving everyone.
“Thanks, Esk,” Lambert said quietly.
“No problem, little wolf.”
Lambert glared at him, but it held little heat.
“I know how much trouble you went to for tonight, even though you tried to act like it was no big deal,” Eskel said.
Lambert opened and closed his mouth but couldn’t come up with a rebuttal, so he took a swig of ale instead.
“Good to see you looking more pink than blue, Aiden,” Eskel added with a grin.
Aiden gave him a wry smile. “Thanks. Sorry I made everyone wait for dinner.”
“It’s no trouble. We wanted to eat together.”
The meal was delicious, even if it was a touch dry. No-one complained, and the ale was good, the mulled wine after dinner even better. Aiden oohed and aahed over his gifts enthusiastically. After everyone had exchanged gifts they settled in around the hearth. Lambert sat on the floor against the chair Eskel lounged in, and Aiden snuggled in between Lambert’s knees, leaning back against his chest.
“Happy Yule, Lambs,” Aiden murmured, turning his head to glance back at Lambert.
“Happy Yule, you bastard,” Lambert replied before leaning in for a kiss.
“I promise to be better behaved next Yule.”
Lambert sucked in a breath at what that implied.
“You better, you fucker, or I’ll give you stable-mucking duty for a week afterwards.”
Aiden grinned. “I’ll be on my very best behaviour.”
“I’m not sure that’s saying much.”
Aiden knocked an elbow back into his ribs.
“Love you, kitten,” Lambert murmured into his partner’s ear.
“Love you too, Lambs.”
-
“I love your love,” Eskel added.
“Oh shut up, monster fucker.” Lambert snarked.
“Don’t be jealous, you’ll make your cat feel bad.”
