#zally

[hitchhikerwithoutguide]

gonna print these and put them over my work desk

[waggtoon]

Last year my supporters on Patreon helped me decide when Zally's birthday is. We eventually settled on April 11th (which coincidentally is one month after my own birthday). Happy Birthday Zally!

[hitchhikerwithoutguide]

so, last sunday was the one year anniversary of zally's death and i didnt want to Make A Thing out of it

but last night i felt kinda wrecked with guilt and anxiety for Not Doing That

maybe i shouldve visited her grave, i was at my parents' for easter lunch anyway and couldve just. gone over there.

or made a post somewhere online about it

but at the same time it felt okay not to make a thing of it. like telling her im doing okay without her

even though im not entirely

but i had some sweet unrelated dog dreams

maybe she sent them to me

(the endless eternal struggle of not believing in an afterlife but also wanting the dead to know you miss them and want to do good by them.....)

[hitchhikerwithoutguide]

yesterday was zally's 13th birthday (or wouldve been)

might have subconsciously added to my bad mood

i tried not to think abt it too much, didnt even text my parents abt it bc i kinda feel like every time i mention her im putting guilt on them

on a positive note, ringo has been *great* for mom. i had a lot of doubt about them getting a new dog, but he's been a very positive addition to the family

im so happy they learned from our mistakes with zally

but sometimes i cant help but feeling like theres a lot of comparing the two dogs, both mom and dad saying things like "he's so much more [something] than zally", which really stabs me in the heart

april 5th will be one year since she left us

i feel so much guilt about the life she lived.

some days i wish i believed in an afterlife, that she would see i miss her and still adore her, and that my parents learned something

but im also glad i dont believe that, bc she was such a jealous dog and wouldve been so hurt by them getting a new dog lol

*if* there is an afterlife, i hope she's happy, pain-free, and can see and understand that new dogs in our lives are a celebration to her and what she taught us, not a way to push her memory and lessons away or to make her jealous

i know she didnt have it as bad as my evil brain goblin tries to convince me she did. i know she had a pretty chill life, a bit understimulated and got some shit for barking a lot, but she was loved and she had a lot of fun. she was always happy and excited

[hitchhikerwithoutguide]

Second time needle felting.

Of course I had to make my late dog. I will most likely make more of her.

Borrowed some of my cat's fur to mix in with the white wool to get the tail right.

Once I make a perfect version of her, my dog, I will add some of her fur that I saved.

[waggtoon]

Patreon Choice pic from August 2024.

Originally drawn as a tribute to the late Rachael Lillis, the original voice of Misty in the Pokemon anime.

[hitchhikerwithoutguide]

I’m never not missing you.

[night-terrors-official]

Sammy’s Pride OCs day 11 - genderqueer

Character: Max Ramírez (they/them)

Identity: genderqueer

From: The Greater Universe

~

Today’s character is Max from TGU, who is genderqueer! Max is the protagonist of TGU, and they have a strong sense of justice for those who are mistreated. Throughout the story, however, they come to discover that not every issue is black and white, and it’s not always about right versus wrong, sometimes things are confusing and nuanced.

Bonus character: Zally is a CatDog and Max’s RESC, or Registered Emotional Support Companion. She is specifically trained to help Max deal with things like panic attacks, depressive episodes, anxiety, and forgetfulness, since these are among the issues they often struggle with. She never leaves their side and will often nudge them with her nose when she senses their emotions spiralling out of control.