whooahaha how are you? anything good happen for you today/this week?? my brother brought me home food from his work today so that was nice!! can I request a drabble for any of the baps again 🥺🥺 i'm always thirsty for fresh bap content 😆💚
So, I’ve been wanting to write out CEO Zelo for far too long now... and frankly, I feel like this is the start of a story. But oh well, let’s just start it off as a drabble now. When I have time, I’ll maybe make it into one!
Also, that was so nice of your brother! My week has been very stressful, let’s not go there!
Pairing: Choi Junhong x reader
Word count: 317
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You couldn’t believe it.
Correction - you couldn’t until you saw it. After all, Junhong had just been that kid next door playing on his skateboard and rapping about everything and anything all the time. You didn’t think poorly of any of this, but you hadn’t fully believed the kid you grew up next door to was now a CEO of a webzine either.
And he was pretty successful too.
“So, what do you think?” he asked, searching for your feedback. Over the years, you had answered this question the most. Junhong would come for your opinion on everything - music, a new dance move, even girls much to your chagrin. And now he was asking you, a currently jobless human, what you thought of his company.
You were flabbergasted. “I don’t know what to say.”
“Just say it, you’ve always been good at steering me in the right direction. I wouldn’t be here without you.”
“Nonsense,” you breathed, looking at the real-time messages coming in by the dozen on his computer screen. You were overwhelmed entirely and smiled up at Junhong. “You’ve really made it.”
“Ha-have I?” His cheeks flushed with colour and then he laughed a little eagerly.
Junhong had definitely grown whilst you were abroad. Taller, that was a given. Not that you had been very vertically inclined yourself. He was broader, the gangly teenage limbs now looked solid, in charge. His baby face had sculpted into that of a handsome CEO and if you hadn’t of known him since he was in diapers, you probably would have swooned.
Heck, you were certain there was a part of you doing that now.
“Y/N?” Junhong called and you blinked rapidly, realising you had zoned out thinking of him in a much different light. You cleared your throat and hummed in response. Junhong seemed anxious. “Do you, uh, do you want to work here with me?”
You walked out of the kitchen and into the hallway, wandering through the apartment and thinking about what other preparations had to be done before you could have the homemade dinner your old friend had invited you and Junhong over for. Have you by any chance forgotten something?
Delicious dinner cooking in the kitchen, check. Bottle of wine, check… You peaked into the living room just out of curiosity while thinking about it all.
Junhong draped in kittens.. Check?
You rolled your eyes, wandering further into the room and heading directly for the couch. The three fuzzy animals have made themselves comfortable on Junhong’s lap and have completely occupied his attention, just lounging around or playing with his fingers, comfortable in his presence and interest in their shenanigans. All of a sudden you found it extra hard to look away for longer than a brief moment. He’s so big and they’re so tiny.. And they got along so well despite all that. It was a hilariously adorable and precious view.
“I thought you were a dog person,” you teased him sheepishly, your hand subconsciously reaching out to pet one of the kittens that was closer to you. It shifted into a more comfortable position and started purring in content right away. Junhong let out a quiet chuckle and thought for a moment.
“I thought so too, but just look at them. How could anyone hate something so fluffy?”
You wanted to lounge around for longer, but upon a call from the kitchen you were forced to leave Junhong who was now completely smitten for his three new companions behind. With a tiny sigh, you threw him a last glance and rose to your feet to leave the room, which was harder than expected, since you couldn’t help but turn around to watch him for a little longer just when you’d reached the doorway.
His movements were light and careful, as if not to accidentally hurt the kittens, the way he smiled at them being sincere and from the heart, putting his dimples on full display. You wouldn’t be opposed to seeing him like this more often, or so you realized there and then.
“Hey, Jun~”
He looked up for a moment, finally paying some attention to you. You looked at him in full seriousness and spoke in a similar tone.
“I really want a kitten now.”
A small smile plastered across his face as he looked down at the kittens in his lap before looking back at you again. His smile grew into a little mischievous smirk, one of those smirks that you didn’t trust too much since they meant something sheepish.
“Re-think that decision. Do you really want somebody to steal all of my attention away from you every time I come to visit?”
Your lips curled into a little pout and you crossed your arms over your chest, making Junhong chuckle a little and re-think his own statement for a moment. Not that he really meant that.. Nothing could ever make him turn away from you for too long. All the sudden adoration he felt towards you flooding him from all sides, his mind made up it’s own rules, re-capping all the good times and feeling he’s had while being together with you. He loved so many things about you, like your smile, your care, your thoughtfulness, your sincerity… All your quirks, all your flaws and all that jazz.
“As if you’re able to tear your eyes off of me for longer than a minute.”
Oh, and the confidence. You smiled a knowing smile, and he returned it, watching as you started walking away and towards the kitchen. His quiet words of conclusion still caught you despite the fact you’d already walked down half the hallway, and you knew by his tone that he was still smiling ear-to-ear when saying them out loud.
word count: 2,6k • characters: you x zelo • genre: smut • gif credit
69 - “ You’re teasing me again… ” | 180 - You have no idea what you do to me. › Actually you just wanted to meet a friend of yours, but it is someone else you ran into. What happens if you’re alone with Junhong after you crashed his private training-session?
Your heart was racing while you stood there not really knowing what was happening to you. Actually you wanted to meet your good friend Jongup, but he obviously wasn’t here. It was Junhong who stood in front of you instead, of all people it must have been him. You just crashed in on his private training-session. Great.
He was kind of surprised to see you here, that was obvious too. But it didn’t take long for him to get himself together, while you’re still catching your breath. Maybe because Junhong’s shirt wasn’t where it supposed to be, as it laid on the couch at the end of the room.
“You’re not Jongup” he said with a smirk on his beautiful face. He seemed to have no problem with the fact he stood in front of you half naked. Like, not at all.
“U-uhm, no” you stuttered, trying to put yourself together. You didn’t want him to know how your body was reacting to his. But there was this attraction between the two of you again, which was there every time you saw each other. It took all of your self-control not to stare at his bare skin. This lightly tanned skin, that well-toned body and.. those biceps. You swallowed hard, trying to get rid of this big lump in your throat.
Junhong tilted his head and took a closer look at you. His smirk grew while he was reading your body language. You were like an open book to him, even if you tried to hide your emotions. But this sight was just driving you crazy. There always was this tension between the two of you but you always managed to ignore it… somehow. At least you didn’t show your insecurity, like you did now. Maybe you were ignoring this for way too long and the fact that his six-pack was literally staring at you didn’t make it any easier.
“You’re drooling, Noona” he said, not taking his eyes off you for just a second.
Obviously he had a lot of fun watching your reactions, as he came a few steps closer to you. He stopped right in front of you so you could see some beads of sweat sparkling on his chest. The heat of his body was reflecting on yours, that’s how close he was to you.
“I’m not!”
The smirk on Junhongs face was gone, but he still stared at you what made your heart beating even faster. Your body was shaking, even if you tried to stay calm. It was just impossible.
His hand raised up to your cheeks and reached out for your heated skin, as your phone began to ring. You sighed relieved and took a step back, sending a silent ‘thank you’ to heaven. As quick as possible you got your phone out of your pocket, checking your messages. It was Jongup.
With trembling hands you unlock your phone and open the messages to read the latest one. I’m sorry, traffic’s been hell. Be there in 30. Stay where you are, Junhong will take care of you. You nearly forgot how to breathe as you realize you’ll be alone with him for at least another thirty minutes.
He looked at his phone too and you instantly knew that Jongup had also written him. At least when he was looking up to you again, throwing his phone onto the couch. He was grinning again, this time more dangerous then before.
“Oh yes, Noona, I will take care of you” he said with a husky voice while he came closer to you again. With every step he was making towards you, you go one step backwards. Only a few steps later you felt the wall on your back, so you can’t move any further. But he didn’t stop until he was that close to you again as he was before.
“Junhong -” you started to say, but he put his index finger on your lips to make you shut up. Your heart was going crazy while it banged against your chest, it almost felt like it would jump out every second.
Again you forgot how to breathe as he leaned down to you to whisper in your ear. “No. This time you won’t get off that easy.”
As he leaned back your eyes met again and this time everything was different. All the longing glances you gave each were nothing compared to the way he was looking at you now. You knew there was no going back once you’d cross that line, but in this moment you couldn’t care less.
He wanted you just as much as you wanted him.
The next moment you felt his lips on yours and he kissed you as if there was no tomorrow. There was no innocence, no softness but burning fire and pure passion. You wrapped your arms around his neck, your fingers ran through his hair. Junhong pressed his body against yours, so you’re pinned to the wall. It almost hurt a little but you didn’t care at all.
He moaned against your lips while you kissed him even deeper. His lips where so soft, so delicate but this kiss was nothing like that. You both realized you needed this more than you could’ve ever imagine.
It was as if your passion burned each other, as if your life depended on that kiss. He wanted to do this for so long.
His hands moved further back until they grab your butt. He pinched it and moaned against your lips one more time, it just felt so damn good. Your fingers still ran through his hair and messed it up, every now and then you clung to it when you’re about to loose your balance because of all the dizziness. Your knees were as soft as butter for a very good reason.
Both of you were completely out of breath as he separated from you and just in this moment you dared to open your eyes again. It was like stars dancing behind your eyes, you were so dim. You needed to hold on to him while he kept looking that deep into your eyes.
“You have no idea what you do to me” he whispered while he puts his hands back on your hips to pull you closer, if that’s even possible. Shortly afterwards, he involved you into another kiss, which was just as fiery as the last one.
It didn’t take long for his tongue to find its way into your mouth to explore it. You moaned softly when your tongue met his and got entangled into a fight. Junhong reached for your thighs and signalized you to jump so that you could wrap your legs around his body. The bulge in his pants pressed impatiently between your thighs and almost drove you mad. His biceps was tensing and his muscles were twitching under your weight, but it was easy for him to carry you over to the couch. Once there, he turned so he could sit down and place you on his lap. He leaned back and pulled you down to him. Your bodies were still grinding against one another while you sat there kissing.
His hands got under the hem of your shirt and pushed it up gently. Feeling his fingers on your heated skin was an absolute delight. As you were able to pull away from this kiss, Junhong pushed the shirt further up and pulled it over your head in an elegant movement. He took a sharp breath as he just looked at you for a moment. Then you felt his lips already on your neck and shortly afterwards moving further down. He was spreading butterfly kisses all over, leaving a pleasant burning sensation on your skin.
In pleasure you threw your head back, your eyes closed and you were moaning softly. Junhong just drove you crazy and you would have loved to rip his clothes right off to make him yours here and now.
“Mhh, Junhong” you moaned softly as his fingers first wiped off the left, then the right strap of your bra. He continued to kiss you where his hands had been before. As he pushed the cloth further aside, revealing your left nipple, he gasped in excitement. His lips surrounded your hardened bud and shortly afterwards his tongue played with it. He licked over it greedily and bit you very carefully. A sweet pain passed through your abdomen leaving behind an ever-increasing heat. You wanted him. You wanted him so bad!
In this time his fingers nested on the closure of your bra, which he had opened quickly and skilfully. Unnoticed it fell down to the ground while Junhong was concentrating on your other nipple. While his tongue was swirling around it you just couldn’t hold on to yourself anymore. You moaned again, this time much louder and more passionately than before. Your lower body rubbed against his and over his hard bulge until he grabbed your hips to make you stop.
“Don’t! You don’t want our little dance to be over that fast, do you?” he gasped between clenched teeth and tried to keep control. His hardness pulsed between your thighs, but he quickly managed to regain control.
Junhong lifted you up again to turn with you and push you back onto the couch. His lips found yours again, but they didn’t stay long. He gently bit your lower lip before he left a trace of kisses down your chin, jawline and neck. He made his way further and further down, between your breasts and down your belly. A shiver ran down your spine and your breath went even faster.
Impatiently he unbuttoned your jeans just to grab inside. You bite your lower lip, suppressing another loud groan. He smirked and a deep groan came out of his throat as he could already feel the wetness through your panties.
“Oh baby, you’re so wet!”
Slowly but surely he lost his patience and the next moment he torn down your pants and you lifted your pelvis to make it easier for him to undress you. In one quick movement you got rid of both your pants and your panties so you laid on the couch completely naked.
Junhong took another moment to just look at you, his breath was unsteady and his eyes reflected the greed for you and your body. He kissed himself up your leg again and just stopped between your thighs. He gently bit the sensitive skin on the inside of your thigh and once again you moan with pleasure.
“Junhong, please” you moan breathlessly and raised your pelvis up to him.
“So impatient, noona?” He grinned against your thigh and teased you a little more before he did what you wanted so badly. You gasp for air as you felt his tongue licking along your slit. He smiled again as he tasted you and with his hands he pressed your legs further apart so that you opened up to him a little more. He groaned against you as his tongue found your sensitive clit and began to play with it.
You were a moaning mess under the movement of his tongue. Your fingers clung desperately on to the couch, while you bite your lower lip again, hoping you wouldn’t completely lose your mind.
He smirked again and licked along your entrance before he let his tongue slide into you. You moaned his name loudly and closed your eyes again. He looked up to you as you pulled him closer to you. Noticing your walls tighten around his tongue, he moans again. He ate you out properly without taking his eyes off of you for a second. Your body kept tensing and your breath went faster and faster. It didn’t take long for him to finally take you over the edge and helped you reaching a high you’ve never experienced before.
When he finally released himself from you, he licked his lips with a grin and moaned with pleasure. “You’re so delicious, babe” he whispered before he came up to you and kissed you eagerly. You tasted yourself on his lips as you reached out for his waistband to open his pants and then stroke over his thick bulge. You bit his lower lip and sucked on it with a soft smirk.
“You’re teasing me again…” he moaned breathless, his eyes closed.
You smirked again and tried to get rid of his pants. Junhong helped you to take off his pants and boxer shorts as he stood up. Now it was your turn to enjoy the view, while he stood in front of you completely naked. His hardness stood proud, almost impatiently waiting for you to be touched. At this view you bit your lower lip because you can’t wait to feel his hardness inside you.
Slowly you got up to stand in front of him. You felt his member pressing against your stomach as you gave him a sweet but sensual kiss. Junhong groaned softly against your lips as you wrap your arms around his neck. You both turned and with a gentle push form you he fell back on the couch so you could climb onto his lap again.
Your hand reached out for his hardness and directed it to your dripping entrance. You were so ready for him. Your eyes met as you slowly glided down on him and you both groaned as he pushed himself deeper and deeper into you. There was this sweet pain for a moment when he filled you up completely and stretched your walls delightfully. He gave you a moment to get used to his length before he grabbed you by your hips to make you move on top of him.
“Urgh, Noona, you’re so tight,” he gasped.
As you slowly moved up and down, Junhong threw his head back in pleasure. A deep groan came out of his throat as you slowly but steadily rode him. Soon you increased the pace and slammed your hips down on him faster and faster. That’s when he hit your g-spot over and over again and nearly brought you to the edge of despair.
“How long I’ve waited for this,” you heard him say but you weren’t able to reply anything.
He raised his head again and looked straight into your eyes as you kept moving up and down. His fingernails dug deep into your hips and caused this intense, but sweet pain. You quickly kissed him to distract yourself from this.
“I’m close,” he moaned when you turned up again. “You feel so incredibly good!”
It only took seconds before you moved your hips for the last few times. When the familiar feeling began to spread through the pit of your stomach, you threw your head back in full pleasure.
“I’m cuming, Junhong!”
He helped you to move a little longer before he was cumming too, spilling himself deep into you. You rolled your one last time before you collapsed on top of him, completely breathless. Junhong buried his face in your neck and inhaled the sweet scent of your hair, while you had your eyes closed and were breathing heavily, too.
“That was madness, Noona.” Another kiss followed, this time much softer than before.
A few minutes later he helped you to get back on your shaky legs. He smirked while he collected all of your clothes. “Let’s make it quick and get out of here before Jongup gets here. He doesn’t need to know how well I took care of you”, he said winking and with a dangerous sparkle in his eyes. “At least not yet.”
If you wanna request, feel free to do so! (and/or maybe take a look at this) <3
Hello! Could I request a scenario with B.A.P’s Junhong where his girlfriend (or boyfriend up to you!) has a minor surgery but wakes after in a panic because hospitals scare them?
Here you go, anon!
Genre: Fluff
Pairing: Junhong x You
By Admin B
Your eyes fluttered open, and the only thought which filled your mind was ‘Where am I?’ You couldn’t remember anything except your name (which was probably a good sign), and it took a while for your blurry vision to focus on your surroundings.
As you stirred in your bed - you could at least tell you were lying down and covered by a blanket - you heard a voice say your name. You knew immediately it was Junhong’s voice. So there’s one thing you remembered: your boyfriend.
“Junhong?” you asked groggily, your own voice sounding foreign and strange.
“Hey,” you heard his whisper. Then you felt his hand on your cheek, his fingers gently caressing your skin. “How are you feeling?”
“I...” You were about to say you had no idea, but then you finally got your bearings a bit. You saw the blanket you were covered with was thin and white. You were wearing a blue nightgown of some sort. Your bed had railings. There was a consistent beeping, and a long wire attached to your arm. No, wait. Not just attached. It was going into your arm.
You were in the hospital.
Your heart started racing, and your eyes grew wide as you tried to sit up. You absolutely hated hospitals, and you couldn’t even remember why you were in here.
“Hey, calm down,” Junhong assured you, putting a hand on your shoulder to keep you from getting up. “You had surgery, remember?”
You looked at him in panic, shaking your head. You didn’t remember at all.
“It’s okay, that’s the anesthesia. It’ll wear off soon, and you’ll remember.” His brow was furrowed as he looked at you, and you knew he was trying his best to stay calm.
“How -- how long?”
“You just got in this morning, and you’ll be able to leave tomorrow. You had your appendix taken out. Everything’s going to be fine.”
You let out a sigh, trying to calm down. You trusted Junhong with your life, and you knew he wouldn’t lie to you. If he said everything was going to be fine, you knew it was.
“You won’t leave me, right?” you asked desperately, reaching out to grip his hand.
“Of course not, baby,” he said softly, bringing your hand up to his lips and kissing it tenderly. “I’ll never leave you.
Master list // RULES // Submit a Request! // Read About the Admins
For the first twenty-five days of December we will be opening up a door on the Idol Advent tree to see who is behind it and waiting with a drabble to share!
To find out who is there for Day 22, click the keep reading!
Snow Falls – Zelo / Junhong
You were hurrying through the park, hoping that taking this shortcut would get you out of the cold and back in your warm apartment sooner.
If there was one thing you hated most, it was snow. It was cold, it felt funny shifting under your boots and it slowed everything else down. You didn’t like driving in it, which was why you took the subway to and from work, and you never understood why people frolicked around in it unnecessarily. Sure, kids found it magical, but you couldn’t wait for it to melt away completely.
Side-stepping around a water fountain, you continued on your trek towards your apartment block when you tripped over something hidden by the snow.
But instead of falling face-first into the powdered surface, you felt someone hold you up. When you looked behind you, the first thing you noticed was he was really tall. And that his lopsided grin was possibly the cutest thing ever.
“Are you okay?”
“Uh, I think so, thank you!”
“No problem, the snow is a bit of a hazard around here. You never know what’s hidden beneath.”
“I thought this would be quicker but it looks like I should stick to the sidewalk instead.”
“Why? Life is a bit of an adventure, right? You need to try new things to decide if you like it or not.”
“Well, I hate snow.”
“Really? I couldn’t tell,” he teased and despite being a stranger, you gaped at him.
“Let me guess, you like it?”
“If I wasn’t out here throwing snowballs with my –!”
He suddenly jumped on you, and you felt a force hit his body as you both jolted forward. You stared at him as he started to laugh again.
“Oh my God, are you okay?! Who does that?!” you exclaimed, looking around the man and scowling at his friend.
He held out his hand. “I’m Junhong. And if I wasn’t out here playing, you would have fallen face-first into that snow there. So isn’t it good one of us doesn’t mind the snow?”
“Junhong,” you started before bending down and scooping some snow up with your gloved hand and pressed it into his jacket. “Thank you, again.”
“It’s my pleasure. And if you want to learn how to actually make a snowball, I’ll see you here tomorrow.”
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To read who is next, check back at 8am NZST daily.
Summary: A relationship contained more than one person’s perspective on it. Tonight Junhong learned that sometimes, perspectives weren’t meant to match up and be the same, as what was ideal to him, may not be the same to you.
“You want to do what?"
He furrowed his brows, groaning a bit and leaning up on his elbow, trying to make sense of what you were talking about while at the same time trying to not crash back against his pillow to fall asleep again. He thought he heard a weird mixture of emotions in your voice too, although maybe it was his tiredness still playing tricks on him. It sounded something like irritation and pity. Irritation towards yourself. Pity towards him. Maybe the other way around, he wasn't sure, so instead of drawing conclusions he kept holding onto his phone tightly and waiting for response from the other end of the line.
"I want to come over... If that is alright with you."
A "no" as an answer wouldn't have been surprising, yet he didn't have the heart to decline your request. It was 4 AM, and for completely sane and normal reasons, this time of day was usually reserved for sleeping. Still, with mild rasp and prominent sleepiness in his voice, he agreed without giving you a chance to sit and anxiously wait for his reply. And with a silent "thank you" you hung up on him, unaware of what you had just done to his always racing mind.
Pulling a sweatshirt over his head, he yawned and stretched, strolling around his bedroom to find a pair of sweatpants to complete his “I still have a bedhead and am wearing my comfiest clothes but still look gorgeous nonetheless” look, or so you’d called it. The sky was still dim, though at a level of darkness that indicated the sun would soon emerge from the horizon and raise high up in between the clouds to stay there all day long. He actually stopped dead in his tracks for a moment to admire the sight before he heard tapping at his front door, followed by the doorbell ringing. You were here, and that instantly made him happy.
To be honest, he was a lovesick fool who lived for these moments with you. He knew it, and didn’t deny it anymore like he used to. He was happy every time you were next to him, and that’s what mattered.
He hadn't even been able to fully open the door and greet you when he was already met with a second quiet request of the night.
"Can we climb up to the rooftop? I really want to watch the stars."
"Sure, sweetheart," he thought, though didn't say it out loud, and simply nodded in reply instead while his mind kept playing his inner monologue, "Whatever you want, you get it."
He slipped his feet into a pair of slippers and grabbed the apartment keys. Locking the door and checking if anyone else was in the staircase, you were quick to make it to the top floor, and from there, to the hatch that lead up onto the rooftop. Residents of the building weren't supposed to be able to get up there as this exit was reserved for technical use only, but he was Junhong - it was only logical that he had obtained the key somehow and would use it to sneak up to where he shouldn’t be. He didn't even recall how he’d gotten the key, though that didn’t stop him from every now and then spending pleasant hours staying up on the rooftop to do his own thing. Things were more peaceful and surreal up there. Things were not bound to time and space. They seemed to happen on their own.
The skyline was absolutely breathtaking.
For a while, he let the view of the still soundly sleeping city take his breath away, before his eyes focused on you and the way you moved towards the edge of the building, realizing that your presence affected him more than anything else did. Graceful and mysterious in your intentions, yet somehow inviting to him, you sat down at a spot where you could see the whole neighborhood from, as if calling him to join you. Within a minute of taking in your beauty he actually gave into that desire and set foot on the ground to make it to you.
It was silent at first. He breathed in the nightly air and for a second let loose of all his serious thoughts. Staying up late usually was his forte, but staying up late on the rooftop, with a person he loved so dearly and had attached so much of his life to.. It was another feeling. A good one. He thought about it a lot as he watched the stars above your heads and tried to understand the tingly feelings in his chest.
He thought about you a lot as he watched. About you and him, and how absurdly happy he felt in the moment, or every moment in your company as a whole. He was sleepy, woken up in the middle of the night, but he could spend extra time with you like this, so he was fine with it. He could once again hug your frame and hold it close against his, could sit there and silently admire your profile and it’s beauty. He could bathe in your existence without needing any reassurance or allowance to do so, because he already had it all. No words, no excessive actions or mentions. He just wanted to sit here and take in this moment that seemed to be completely at his feet now.
Then he heard something he thought came completely out of the blue, though didn’t seem necessarily provocative at first.
"I'm being stupid."
His hand landed on top of yours, and he noticed how warm his skin was in comparison to yours. He also felt the little flinch your body initially reacted to his movement with, though he paid no attention to it.
"What are you talking about, sweetheart?"
"I'm.. I'm having doubts I shouldn't have."
He stayed unbothered for a brief moment of time until the words had sunken into his mind and he started thinking over their meaning. A conversation out of the blue, at an hour no person would bother to converse at like this, wouldn’t be held unless there was the total need to do so. Whatever was troubling you had to be serious. His heart started beating a little faster and he nervously looked over to you from his side.
"Doubts about..?"
"Us... I think."
The "I think" was the cherry on top that left him halfways calm and collected about the nerve-wrecking reply he was given just now. Everything else bothered him indefinitely and made him feel nervous. But it was such a beautiful night, and somehow, it made him want to try to remain calm. It slowed down his heartbeat and suggested him to think rationally. That’s what he’d always been told by older and wiser people - to think rationally. That’s what he decided to do now as well.
“Tell me about it."
He heard you sighing, and felt the heaviness of that single, lone gesture. In return, his hand that had been on top of yours this whole time provided you with a reassuring squeeze, to tell you that it was okay.
"You know you can tell me everything. We can talk about it."
You chuckled a little, realizing you didn't know what to start from and feeling a lump building in your throat instead. He was right next to you, providing you with reassurance, and still, he seemed so distant. You didn’t want him to be distant though. You wanted him to be as close as he used to be.
"I love you, Junhong."
This again, was completely out of the blue, and usually, it would've made his heart skip a beat. He would've felt a rush of adoration and would be swooped off his feet in the matter of seconds, would’ve probably blurted out the same in reply. So how comes he was sitting there motionless this time around, waiting for more?
Was it because of your melancholic tone when you said it?
"I really love you," you continued quietly, making the conversation just loud enough to seem very personal between the two of you, "I hope you know that. I may have had my doubts in the past, because, you know.. Being in love for the first time isn’t always easy, you’re not exactly given a manual on how to do it.. But I’m pretty sure it’s a permanent feeling now. I want it to be permanent, that is. I really like being with you. I like being into you."
He squeezed your hand in his again. A mild smile made it's way to your face, and it was enough for him to reflect the action. Maybe things weren’t as bad as they seemed on first glance. Maybe you still felt comfortable to talk to him like this, even if at first he feared that you wouldn’t open up to him.
"And I want to be happy with you, you know.. I want to be your source of energy. I want to be supportive. I want to conquer the world with you just because we can. I want to come back to you and feel affection pouring from out of my heart every time I lock eyes with yours, and I want to give my best for your sake, but.."
Wait for it, he thought. The most cruel statements always had an emotionally tragic lead-up to them.
"But I don't feel that way right now. In fact, I feel the complete opposite of all I've been trying to feel recently."
He stayed silent and watched the skyline instead. What you said made no sense to him from his own perspective. You always seemed happy in his company, were always sincere and spent your best and worst times with him, because it was how you wanted it to be, or so you’d always said. You were a power couple, you could wreck the whole world if you wanted to, if only you did it together. He was sold for your charms and you always provided them to him. He couldn't see the smallest part of the issue. That is, until another lone thought made it’s way into his mind, and upon considering that, pieces of the puzzle started falling into the right places.
That was only his perspective.You, of course, had your own as well.
“How can I help you feel different about it?”
You opened your mouth to speak, but closed it again soon after. It’s as if you wanted to say one thing, and then were caught up in thinking about another thing and got lost in your thoughts.
“So.. You’re not mad at me?”
He chuckled lightly. Almost unnoticeably.
“Why should I be?”
“Well.. I did say a thing or two rather reckless to you,” you shifted in your seat nervously, “Talking about not being happy in a relationship is being reckless.. I figured you might be upset.”
“I’m not upset at all.. I’m rather intrigued. Or, how to say.. I realized a thing or two just now.”
You threw him a questioning glance. He returned it with a statement.
“Literally minutes ago, I was sitting here with you and thinking about how happy I felt in the moment. To me, everything was as perfect as it could be. I felt great, and thought you felt the same way. A blissful mixture of every part a relationship should take care of - I though we had it, in full seriousness. But I guess I was too caught up in my own feelings to consider you might have different ones.. ”
“Junhong..”
“Hey, let me finish,” he turned to you and gave you a small smile, seeing how you tried to return it though had troubles doing so gradually, “Just because you feel different about it, doesn’t mean any of our feelings are wrong, okay? They simply differ.”
You looked guilty though, and kept silent instead of replying. But the atmosphere wasn’t so burdening anymore. In fact, he found it to be the right moment to joke a bit now.
“I didn’t just ruin a breakup speech of yours, did I?”
“No, don’t even dare thinking about getting rid of me,” you chuckled and he did too, and then wrapped and arm around your shoulder and scooted closer to your side. You’d been too distant for a while already, and since it was relatively cold outside, and he believed he could battle the cold by snuggling up. Your head landed on his shoulder and suddenly, he felt so much warmer. Feeling how your body gradually warmed into his had always been a favorite of his.
“You’re stuck with me forever, which is your own fault.. I’m getting off track. What I meant to say, or, well - state - was something different..”
He patiently waited for you to continue.
“I really love you, Junhong-”
“We’ve established that already-”
You poked him in the side, making him chuckle, proclaim a dramatic “ow!” and raise a hand up in surrender. Junhong always knew how to make situations cheeky. He had a natural born talent for making atmospheres brighter, and he used it every time the space around him was getting darker.
"It’s just that... I was laying in bed at home tonight, and I couldn't fall asleep. And for some reason, I felt really lonely. Like, I knew I could call you, but it took me hours before I actually picked up my phone to, well, get here. I don’t know why I didn’t do it sooner. It’s not that I didn’t want to, I just didn’t think I should.."
He listened quietly, feeling a raindrop landing on the tip of his nose. Too bad. You’d have to get inside pretty soon, in that case.
“It’s weird to me - just recently, I would’ve never even considered waiting for so long before going to get your help or company when I needed it,” you told him, eyes glued onto the oncoming flock of big, dark blue clouds. The weather forecast did state that there’d be heavy rain in the morning.
“And I guess I just got confused and overreacted.. You know how it is, when a person feels low, and has a hard time dealing with themselves and their own emotions. I started thinking if I am happy with you, just to realize that yeah, I am. I have simply recently developed a bad habit of painting things in a different, much darker light, and that’s the issue, I think. That’s what’s been changing my perspective on many things, including you and me.”
Perspectives. It amazed him how everyone had their own. He had just been sitting here and thinking about how perfect everything was from his point of view. How he loved the night and how it made your hair shine, how special he felt that you decided to spent time with him.. How committed he knew he was. All of that just to hear that you felt stuck in your own tracks.
He really didn't see you slowly crumbling next to him, and that set a certain fire in his chest that he yet had to learn how to extinguish. He was just glad that he knew it now - he was glad that he knew you weren’t entirely okay. It’s not like you’d tell him yourself, it’s not like he’d always notice your troubles when you tried to hide them up so well and so badly either. He was glad you were being honest with him. He was glad you trusted him as much as he trusted you.
"Junhong.."
Your eyes were still bright with guilt and worry as they looked at him, and to mend that, he pressed his lips against your temple in a supportive manner. He was here, and so were his kisses. Feather light and innocent, they’d give you a little bit of much needed comfort. He’d keep showering you with them until you’d beg him to stop, and would make sure you’d never lack affection ever again.
"I’m sorry for everything.”
"I really love you too (Y/N)."
You knew he would understand, so up until the rain started pouring down hard and soaking your clothes, you stayed curled up on the rooftop, entertaining yourselves with the peaceful aura surrounding this place. And even as you had to leave it behind, Junhong’s palm was secured in yours, and he was leading you back to his place just a few floors down from here. Giving you a nice big shirt of his, a bed to sleep in and a warm embrace lasting until the moment you woke up the next morning. And once you did, you couldn’t help but look at his still sleeping face and trace soft patterns against his cheek, thinking only the best of him, because he deserved only the best, you were certain of it.
Junhong was the right man for you, because he never misunderstood. And when you said you weren’t happy, instead of taking offense, he tried finding the root of the issue and did everything to prevent it from ever bothering you again.
