ssometimes ifeel so bsd for selfshipping in ffandoms wwithso little characters,, llike . ffreyja and simon ,,.. tjeyre two ofmy main f/os snd who i postavoyt modt so thrull work ffor example .
bbut . becsuse llike. in a..not tterribly large fsndom with little characters tjeres gonnabe a lot if fictkins snd introjects onto tjose chars . considerign the lack of them ,, llike tptm only hscing . 10 actusl xharacters
snd llike . italmosy feels wrong to ,,, bbe so passionste about the characters ffor fear of msking those introjects/fictkins uncomfortsble irupset or
whstever
becsuse im fuckign friends wirhsome of them !!!! lliekhsts cool !!! coolness!!! youreawesome thsts awesome ssuupes cool bbut imfucking scared mman idont wsnna fucksnything up justby doign whst makesme happy
llike . fictkin mmyself . ifeel connected to tshira in the level tjat she is literally me . i gget sent into litersl identity crises onthe mmere sight of doubles so . iget it . the fictkin thing imean.
but i ususlly just tryto ignore selfship ccontent of . tje character rhat . i see as myself . if i evercome across it. bbecsuse itmakes me a bit unccomfortsble…
snd imthinkign!!!sbout how overbearign ican be sbout my f/os … sofoes rhst mske it worse to otherpeople wjo ?? feelthe same way that ido????
hgrrgshdhdhd fuckiwant to feel normsl about this snd iwant to lovemy f/os normslly bbut imso obsessed snd dependent onthem snd overbearign snd ineed to actrhe wsy i do or i. idontknow
tjis isjust allgonna end up inme gettign blocked by everyonesomedsy . iknow it .
iftjis. makesno sense ivebeen tryignto write rjiz ffor likesn hour couldnt figureout tjwwording
sso imjust. stickign to this
tjis isnot aimed st anyome if snyof my aforementioned friends see tjis . iswear itsnot sbout you itsnothing personal . ivejust been tjinkign alot sbout tje things isee snd how tjey make me feel snd iy msde me paranoid snd feel gross snd . stuff.
uuhgghhh ffuck man . idont even feellike drawign simon snymore ifeel like im notallowed to . coolness
