This should be a summary of and a critical reflection on your research process so far. You should try to give the reader a sense of the process you have been through - your journey, your thoughts and decisions along the way and what has informed the choices you’ve made. Try to be as honest and as critically reflective as you can.
Please extend boxes as required (length 1000-2000 words)
(Or working title - how and why did this title develop?)
This working title developed in a few different ways. As this project is going to focus on my family, specifically my brother, I wanted the title to be meaningful and relate specifically to my brother. The reason the working title is the life of a phoenix is because it’s both metaphorical and real. A phoenix is a fictional character that essentially lives forever. Once it comes to the end of its life cycle it bursts into flames, and from the ashes, a new phoenix is born. I like the symbolism and meaning behind this, as in a way its similar to my brothers’ story, having to ‘kill’ or ‘die’ from his old life, the person he was, to be reborn and become the newer and real him. His name is also Phoenix so it links directly to him and his story and can inform the audience of who this is about.
(What methods have you used during this phase of the project and how have they helped you develop your ideas and inform your major project proposal?)
During this phase of the project I focused a lot on magazines and books to get my inspiration. My project idea has shifted massively since the beginning of the semester, starting as being a potential fashion inspired portraiture series to now being a series about identity and family. Although the original research I had done, such as looking through vogue and GQ magazines for example hasn’t directly helped develop my work now, it gave me some ideas. There were some pages and shoots in the magazines that played on the typical masculine and feminine colour schemes and used the identities of the models in playful ways which I quite liked.
When my idea changed books and websites were my sole form of research. I looked at a lot of different series of work, many not being very helpful but a lot of them helping me to understand what would be best to not include in my series and what could potentially be an interesting subject matter. The images helped me to solidify the idea as well, as I had some confusion when I shifted project ideas as to what would and wouldn’t be a good project, so they helped me to understand that I need some emotion and meaning behind my work, not just something that looks nice and I think it has definitely benefited me.
(What have you achieved through the development of your pilot project/s? What have you learned from the process? Identify the main concepts that might direct or drive your major project.)
Through the development of my project I think I’ve been able to get a better understand of how I want to present my work, and the work I think I should be presenting. Before the start of this project I would focus on what I thought looked nice and try to create something like that and backtrack and create a meaning and context afterwards, but for this project I’ve done the opposite. I knew I want to focus on people, and their identities, but I wanted to do something meaningful. Something that I can look at and feel a real and powerful connection with. Making sure the project looks nice is obviously something I need to be doing, but if I’m not 100% convinced that what I’m doing is something I really connect with then I no longer want to be doing it.
That’s the main reason my pilot project has changed so much since the start of the semester. I was trying to create something based around what I like to see, and the lack of meaning and reasoning behind it was causing a mental block and I would be struggling with it. For my pilot project and now major project idea I started with my ideas, and researched after, I’m still not clear completely on how it will look or certain specifics within it, but I feel passionately about it that I know it will fall into place.
I’ve learned now that meaning is everything. Without it, it feels empty, and forced and insincere, which isn’t work I want to produce. I tried a set of images using a sitter and asked him to in a way perform emotions, and they didn’t look right. You could tell there was something off, something fake about it and it made me realise how much I need the meaning behind it. The work I’m trying to produce for this project is very personal to me and my family, so if it looks forced and empty then I’m not doing the right work.
The main drive for the project is identity. For me it’s something I have a little issue with, not really knowing how I want to be or struggling to be who I am, and in the past in school for example I have been bullied about it. It caused a lot of mental blocks for me and has made me struggle to communicate with people on many occasions. For me, focusing on identity, especially in a way that is so close to home has already helped me to become more comfortable and more myself with my friends and family, and allowed me to shrug off the comments I used to hear. Feeling as though I had different identities that wanted to come out or felt more like me than what I’m trying to show people was difficult, but no way near in comparison to my brother, whose had t go through so much more. The main reason my brother is so important to me, as well as the project, is because as much as he has already gone through a lot to become who he is, I can tell that he still isn’t completely comfortable. There are moments where he is so much quieter than I remember and you can see that he’s really struggling, so the project doesn’t just become about me creating work, it becomes a way, at least I hope, for him to be him, and be happy and comfortable and know how much the people around him care about him.
(Has a consideration of Context and Audience made you think about your project in a particular way? Have you been aware of the histories, conventions and audience expectations of particular contexts? Have you considered different contexts and how have you responded to them?)
A consideration of the context and the audience of my pilot project has made me think about the project in a specific way. Firstly its made me understand that it’s a very delicate subject, not just for my family but for other people to, so I know that I cannot be doing this project in an exploitative way, a way in which it just looks like an in conceived idea to look edgy or creative in some way. I know that I need to be careful with this, and not be trying to hard to convince people about the work. it needs to be subtle and powerful at the same time. I also know that there will be a lot of people who might like the project, but also a lot of people who might not and disagree with it due to the subject matter. Because of this I know that I have to be careful with the images I’m showing and the meaning I want people to get from it, so that there cannot be issues completely one way or the other. I want people to be able to look at the work, and whether they like it or not, or agree with it or not, be able to understand it and respect it.
Production and Presentation
(Discuss the production methods you have been exploring through your pilot project. What effects do these different approaches/ visual strategies have on the work? What choices have you made in the refinement of your visual approach and why? Is the approach you have chosen effective in communicating your ideas to the identified audience?)
For the presentation of my work I’ve looked at a lot of different methods. I thought about the idea of using a video for my work, but personally I don’t think I’m comfortable enough doing a video project, but I also don’t think a video is necessary. I wouldn’t want my work to be too documentary in nature and I think that is the only way that a project that I’m creating could be done and its not a way id like.
A book could be an interesting way to present the work, it would feel like a kind of diary but I’m not so sure that could work as a full project. If I were to use some form of book it would probably be a way to accompany the work, but not as the main project. I’ve also created a book before and it didn’t turn out the way I had hoped so it might not be the best way to present the work if I don’t think it’s the best work I can make.
The best way to present and produce the work in my opinion would be a series of prints, the sizing is still something I am unsure about. Depending on the work, the images and what I want to portray through the images will affect the size. In previous projects I haven’t really done any prints any larger than a4 size so for the most part id want them to be larger than that but if the series doesn’t work being that size ill have to rethink and adjust the work.
Visual References / Bibliography
(List the key visual and critical references you have explored during the research process. Discuss how useful these references were for the project and what you learned from them).
Asa Johanneson- Portraits of him and the boy and the twins
These references were very useful for my project as it allowed me to look at my chosen subject specifically, and in a different way. Portraits of him contrasts the soft colours of the background, to the situation of the people trying to be as male as possible. Its very simplistic but that’s all it needs to be, anything other would be too much. The subject matter is also very personal to Asa, so it creates the link with the audience and her work in more than just nice images, there’s a real meaning behind the work and it creates a sense of understanding and self-reflection that I like. The series the boy and the twins focuses on the femininity and masculinity in people and explores the concept of being a boy or a girl. This project is again very useful as its playing and exploring the way people act and can be perceived, and how everything isn’t just black and white. For my project I want to focus on something very similar and something that can explore these things in a way that is thoughtful and respectful to the subjects, which I think Asa does here.
Zanele Muholi – hail the dark lioness
For the series Muholi uses herself, not a model, in some strange and in some cases uncomfortable looking situations to try and confront the politics of race and representation and questioning the way in which black people and their bodies are shown and perceived by others. it’s a very powerful series, and having looked through the photobook, its meaning is very evident. it’s interesting to see a series be so personal and powerful yet in ways be very subtle and simple in how it’s being viewed. The thought of using myself in the images was one I hadn’t really thought about but there is so much passion and emotions in the work that could only be done by using herself, so using myself in the series to help explore emotions and feeling as well as different perceptions might work quite well.
Ana Oliveria – identities
Oliveria focuses on the identities of her subjects and how they change physically over time. I liked the comparisons in the images but its not something that I think would work in my project. It feels to insensitive to include side by side images of a person being who they are and who they no longer want to be. Although I don’t want to directly compare the two, I like the idea of using old images as a way to try and tell a bit of a story, maybe in a form of a notebook or scrap book of some kind to accompany the project that would give a bit more context to the series and help the audience understand what they are seeing a bit more.
This series by Sawada is about the malleability of identity through physical appearances. Like Muholi’s series they are all self-portraits that explore identity in a different way. I like the simplistic nature of the series but it’s not something I think I can now use as reference material. It doesn’t feel real enough, especially in comparison to my chosen subject matter. I like the idea and could incorporate some explorations of mine or my brother’s identity into the series but as a direct comparison wouldn’t work.
