Harvey x Acts of Service
I would like to start by stating two things:
1. I know the concept of Love Languages isn’t actually real - I’m doing this just for fun. Relax, it’s not that deep
2. English isn’t my first language, so please ignore any grammar mistakes I might make
Let’s start by dissecting what happened between Harvey and his mother.
We also know that, off-screen, when he was older, he connected the dots and said he was gonna tell his dad if she did it again. The first time, his mom made up a lie and just asked him to not tell his dad; the second time, she promised she wouldn’t do it again. Both times, she manipulated him through her words, but didn’t live up to what she said. Bobby wasn’t just a friend, like she said first, and she kept hooking up with him for years, even after she said it was over between them.
As a consequence, Harvey doesn’t believe in what people tell him - he believes in their loyalty once they show it to them. When he swore his loyalty to someone, he didn’t bother saying it over and over again - he would just prove it by doing whatever was necessary.
That’s why, when Donna begs him to comfort her, he says “he doesn’t have the time for words.” Yes, he was overloaded with everything that was happening, but he also didn’t believe that telling her would change anything - he needed to act to actually help her.
He doesn’t tell Louis he doesn’t want him to leave the firm - he just tears his resignation letter in front of him. He doesn’t tell Mike he’s scared as fuck he might go to prison - he does everything he can to avoid it, and once he realizes he can’t, he tries to switch Mike with himself. He doesn’t tell Donna he’s sorry for choosing Paula for a second (even though he should’ve - she let him off way too easily) - he tore her resignation letter and told her he would be okay if she came back. He does it, instead of just telling he will do it.
His mom told him many lies and made him lie to his dad - she said one thing and did another. Harvey is the opposite - he does one thing without bothering to even tell anyone he’s doing it, because he knows most people knows he will solve the problem.
That’s exactly why Donna leaves him at the end of season 4 - because he finally said what she wanted to hear, but he didn’t do anything about it. She knows he’s a person who does whatever he wants, so she assumes he doesn’t want her.
After all those years, she heard him say he loved her, but that was it. She still had hope he would, one day, wake up and realize what was right in front of him all that time, but once he said he loved her but left her apartment and then decided not to try to be with her, she thought it was over. And she left, because she couldn’t be around forever, waiting for him.
That’s also why her “I want more” was becoming partner and then, later, being COO. Harvey wouldn’t take the shot with them, but she knew he would go to the end of the world for her when it came to their work. So she knew he would find a way to promote her.
So, unlike at the end of season 4, she chose her career instead of her hope that Harvey would come around.
In season 7, she also didn’t choose to leave the firm and pursue something else instead - she saw how Harvey acted like she betrayed him when she left him back in season 4, because she acted as if she didn’t care about him. For him, leaving him and working for someone such as Louis, who fucked him up many times, was a betrayal. She left him because there was one thing he couldn’t do, and she couldn’t accept it nor make peace with it.
(I’m sorry for the next sentences, because I’m about to meet Paula)
When Donna left him in season 4, he found someone else to talk to; to vent; to complain about; and to receive advice from. He couldn’t count on her anymore, and found it on a therapist - as a consequence of his panic attacks. If I had to guess, without his panic attacks, he would just vomit everything on Mike, who would try to tell him to fix things with Donna - and then he would go to Jessica, as he did, and who basically told him to get over it. Paula was the only one who seemed open to listen to him and give him advice (even though she was terrible at it) - and she did so because she was his therapist. He told her he realized he wanted to share everything with her, but he just didn’t fucking realize it was because she was his therapist, and not because he wanted to be in a relationship with her. Harvey just couldn’t separate things, and Paula made a huge mistake by not separating them herself.
She decided to give it a choice, even though she’s heard over and over how Harvey felt about Donna - she even told him they loved each other while dating him (what the fuck is wrong with her?). And then, during half the time of their relationship (if you can call that a relationship), they talked about Donna. She forced him to fire her and, in the same night, he realized the huge mistake he made - and went back on it.
He wouldn’t allow Donna to do it because he knew she would do everything and more for him when it came to their work, and there was no way he would get rid of that for someone who forced him to make Donna leave.
And guess what? When he wasn’t disbarred, he looked around and tried to find someone to celebrate it with - he went for Alex, who told him he wanted to go home to his wife; Robert was sad and went home to his wife because she was the one he wanted to share that moment with; Samantha asked him what was she supposed to do without Robert there, to be the one she always shares things with. And then it clicked for him - Robert went home because he was sad, and he wanted to be comforted by the person he loved; Alex went home because he went through a lot with Harvey almost getting disbarred and Zane taking his place; Samantha had no one to go to - but Harvey was glad he didn’t go down, and Donna was the person he wanted to share it with. Because when the chips were down, she would do anything for him. But when they were up, he took a long time to realize she was the one he wanted by his side - he looked around and she wasn’t there, and then he went for her.
And Donna? Like Mike said, she knew from day one about his secret - and she kept it from everyone because they are a team, and they’re there for each other for everything. And she is the one who gets him - who left when he said but didn’t do it, and who stayed when he did it.
Because he’s a person who does it.
Edit: just found this interview with Gabriel Macht, Harvey’s actor, in which he summed up pretty much everything I wrote. Here it is:
“Then it got to the point where he needed her from a work standpoint and she was his right hand, and he could not live without her to navigate the world of law how he saw fit,” he recalled. “He understood that if they did get together, then that would be the end of his career, He was so career-motivated for so long that he put it out of his mind. She’d start dating people here and there, and I think he would question himself along the way. But at a certain point, and as the years went further, I think he realized that there’s something more than just your work life, your career.” Macht continued, “Everyone’s going home to their loved ones and maybe I’m not seeing what’s right in front of my stupid face. So that’s why, I think, it clicked for him and it clicked for her. And they were both at the right place at the right time, and that’s why they’re finally connected.”
I want to highlight “(…) everyone’s going home to their loved ones and maybe I’m not seeing what’s right in front of my stupid face. So that’s why, I think, it clicked for him (…)”, because that’s exactly what happened in 8x16. He saw everyone going home to someone they loved, whether to be comforted or to enjoy each other’s company, and he saw Samantha, who lost the one person who was that for her, and he looked around and his person wasn’t there. His person wasn’t at the hearing nor at the firm, and he wanted to talk to her about what happened and share with her his highs and lows.
Throughout the show, we’ve seen Harvey went through many problems and obstacles - and Donna was there for him every step of the way. And when he finally got something serious off his back and could truly breathe, he realized he need her to be there too when “his chips were up.”
