THE 7 BEST “TRANSMETROPOLITAN” QUOTES ABOUT JOURNALISM, RELIGION, AND FREE SPEECH — aka “What Would Spider Jerusalem Do?”
One of the things I love about geek culture is its ability to make amazing art and literature while thinking deeply about fairly big questions. I’ve been thinking pretty deeply myself in the past month or so about the ongoing cultural disagreement between free expression and religious orthodoxy. As a former professional journalist, I cringed when I read about the senseless attacks on the editorial staff of satirical magazine Charlie Hebdo. The more I thought about it, the more I found myself angry, and wondering “what would Spider Jerusalem do?”
If you don’t know who Spider Jerusalem is, close your browser window now and go to your friendly neighborhood comic shop, buy the entire trade paperback run of Warren Ellis’ modern cyberpunk classic, and then come back. I’ll wait here. No, really, go on now, and don’t come back until you have either a bowel disruptor or a filthy assistant (preferably both); I’m not going anyplace. All caught up now? Excellent, now we can begin…
I’m fairly sure that Spider wouldn’t really come down on a “side” here, except that of the truth. Much like his real-life inspiration, Hunter S. Thompson, he was most concerned with practicing actual journalism of the “stick it to the man” variety. They were also hilarious, profane, and deeply devoted to the cause of the capital-T “truth”. With that in mind, here are the top 7 Spider Jerusalem quotes that will make you laugh and make you think
1. “There’s one hole in every revolution, large or small. And it’s one word long — people. No matter how big the idea is they all stand under, people are small and weak and cheap and frightened. It’s people that kill every revolution.” It’s been true since the days of the guillotine in 18th-century France, right on up to the Occupy Movement…
2. “Journalism is just a gun. It’s only got one bullet in it, but if you aim right, that’s all you need. Aim it right, and you can blow a kneecap off the world.” Walter Cronkite or Edward R. Murrow might not have phrased it this way, but they would’ve totally agreed. Hunter S. Thompson would’ve too, and likely would have added more profanity!
3. “Messianic fuckheads are a superstitious, cowardly lot, and I must strike fear into their hearts.” Tell us what you really think about zealots, Spider!
4. “Thieves, the goddamn lot of you! Thieves and leeches! Fucking vampires sucking the will from people whose only goddamn crimes were to be frightened and tired! And you don’t help them! You don’t listen to them! They get no truth from you! All you do is scare them with stories of something that doesn’t exist! And you bastards are winning! Hundreds more of you every day!” Yeah, that’s what Spider thinks of zealots, especially of the religious variety. Darick Robertson’s art is particularly spot-on here, as Spider is clearly the Christ-figure throwing the money changers out of the temple.
5. “Don’t look for media-approved ideologically sound Right Causes where there are none. Look out of the window instead, and do something about what you see there.” Don’tbelieve everything you read. For bonus points. don’t believe everything you think!
6. “He’s prepared to delete the First Amendment. He’s prepared to kill dissenting voices. He’s prepared to do anything to get what he wants. Well, newsflash: so am I.” Sometimes you have to fight fire with fire.
7. “I support free speech, obviously. But equally obviously, all things must be taken in moderation. This is something we need to strongly communicate to the media.” This is quite possibly the most level-headed thing we hear from anybody in Transmet. Too bad it’s from the worst person in the whole book.
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