Visiting my rootless roots as an adult Third Culture Kid “TCK” did some googling to see if I could find books or other black kids who grew up as TCKs. Posting what I’ve found in tonight’s search.
and someone from this site gave a summary - lots of things i relate to:
Common TCK characteristics:
Their physical appearance is often unique (compared to norm in “second culture” – their new home)
Some, perhaps most, expect to return home at one point (repatriation)
Often have a privileged lifestyle due to “sponsoring agency” (e.g. housing covered by parent’s corporate relocation package)
System identity: many choose to pursue more important, “representative” roles – TCKs really need a sense of purpose and meaning in their lives
Common occurrences among TCKs:
Denial of feelings of sadness or grief
“We’re just going to move again, what’s the point of getting attached [to person / place / thing” (form of victim mentality)
Loss of their “world” (which could mean any combination of possessions, lifestyle, status, relationships, role models, system identity, past life). With that, perceived loss of control over their life
Don’t give themselves permission to grieve, or time to process the change.
ROOTLESSNESS AND RESTLESSNESS IN TCKS:
The questions TCKs dread the most: Where are you from? Where is home? (Answer: everywhere and nowhere).
TCKs have a Migratory Instinct (rootlessness) – they constantly feel it’s time to move even when it isn’t.
“No place is permanent—don’t get too attached” and “just leave” (default solutions when a problem arises).
In response to this feeling, many swear to settle down and never move again (but ths is not easy)
RELATIONAL PATTERNS OF THIRD CULTURE KIDS:
Develop patterns of self-protection (against further pain of separation) that may affect relationships throughout their lives
Feel they can’t possibly keep up with everyone (people they know are spread out all over the world)
BENEFITS AND CHALLENGES OF BEING A TCK:
Benefits and challenges come in pairs for the TCK:
Benefit: Expanded worldview
Challenge: Confused loyalties
Benefit: Three dimensional view of the world
Challenge: Painful awareness of reality
Benefit: Cross-cultural enrichment
Challenge: Ignorance of home culture
Benefit: Less prejudice (due to open mind and world experiences etc.)
Challenge: More prejudice (when they can’t help but feel “superior” to citizens of home culture)
Benefit: Appreciative of authority (understand benefits of a system that works)
Challenge: Mistrustful of authority (feel like people are always making decisions for them)
Another benefit: TCKs truly importance of now. They have a sense of urgency. Do it now, seize the day. New, unexpected choices can materialize at any moment – and TCKs know to act fast when it happens.
A unique challenge: linguistic skills (while TCKs may pick new languages, they often lose fluency and depth in native tongue).
Benefits and challenges come in pairs for the TCK:
Benefit: Expanded worldview
Challenge: Confused loyalties
Benefit: Three dimensional view of the world
Challenge: Painful awareness of reality
Benefit: Cross-cultural enrichment
Challenge: Ignorance of home culture
Benefit: Less prejudice (due to open mind and world experiences etc.)
Challenge: More prejudice (when they can’t help but feel “superior” to citizens of home culture)
Benefit: Appreciative of authority (understand benefits of a system that works)
Challenge: Mistrustful of authority (feel like people are always making decisions for them)
Another benefit: TCKs truly importance of now. They have a sense of urgency. Do it now, seize the day. New, unexpected choices can materialize at any moment – and TCKs know to act fast when it happens.
A unique challenge: linguistic skills (while TCKs may pick new languages, they often lose fluency and depth in native tongue).
2087
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