Teeth Consumer

Damn, I let my old bio get way out of date. Either that, or I've been 19 for several years now.

[notlikingbestgirl]

Taste closed

[bravebirdfolly]

Inspector, if you can’t find the murderer I suggest wrapping this up (yea)

[mapcus-deactivated20180524]

This is how the original English dub should’ve been lmaooooo

[maykitz]

when people who want to be vaguely progressive say 'nature' all secular style but it's painfully obvious they mean 'god' while thinking they don't mean god

[maykitz]

"natural behaviour" "the natural body" "nature intended" "nature created" no da fuck it didn't

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

“Culture tends to argue that it forbids only that which is unnatural. But from a biological perspective, nothing is unnatural. Whatever is possible is by definition also natural. A truly unnatural behaviour, one that goes against the laws of nature, simply cannot exist, so it would need no prohibition.” - Yuval Noah Harari

[the-only-useful-lesbian]

to the fairest

Athena

Hera

Aphrodite

Voting ended onJan 24, 2024

Reblog for larger sample size whatever

[bloodied-dagger-deactivated2024]

[honeysider]

no no let em cook, what do i get if i choose one of them

[the-only-useful-lesbian]

Athena gives you a really cool sword and armor.

Hera offers you a life long and happy

Aphrodite offers you the most beautiful woman in the world. She does not specify if this woman is married or not

[honeysider]

oh fuck yeah i love women i vote aphrodite

[the-only-useful-lesbian]

Uh oh, she's married to the King of Sparta and now all of her former suitors are after you and they all brought a minimum of 600 soldiers.

[honeysider]

thank the gods for these really sturdy walls i think everything will go so well for the neighborhood

[the-only-useful-lesbian]

Big horse.

[honeysider]

Ooooooo~! gimme gimme gimme

[dduane]

Okay, I'm declaring this one an epic. (Self-defined.)

[mintyspacecadet]

A little guy

[incorrect-wormquotes]

Tattletale: What's your blood type?  Skitter, bleeding out: How would I know?  Grue: How would you not!?  Skitter: Who am I, Karl Landsteiner, discoverer of blood groups?  Imp, confused: You don't know your own blood type, but you know who discovered them?! 

[incorrect-wormquotes]

“everyone who has ever died from anything is an idiot. I wouldn’t have done that.”

— Taylor Hebert

[zoe-the-astromaniac]

Be careful of Asexuals y'all, I heard they aren't fucking around

[nvmlmao]

[whitepeopletwitter]

[larval-tear]

elf sex: 3 to 12 effeminate twinks coo and giggle in a sensual pile in the woods. sometimes the elf queen joins and pretends they’re her baby birds

dwarf sex: a pair of strong able bodied warriors tacitly agree to mate as equals under a binding contract of tomelike thickness, with consent from the council

gnome sex: married couple of 200 years finally gives in to temptation and call upon the stork to deliver their child, then sleep in separate beds completely satisfied

[bisquitt]

[10001gecs]

My car seat vibrates if you drift out of the lane without the signal on, found out I can cum from that 😏

can you imagine getting smushed into a paste on the 101 because some twink is too cheap to buy a vibrator and decided to merge into you

[teaboot]

Thinking back to the good early days before my skin grew back when people could shake their heads at me and say "masks are a government conspiracy" and instead of navigating the bullshit like a normal person I could pull mine down and say "I have chemical burns on my face"

[teaboot]

things people expect in a political confrontation:

Facts

Logic

Emotional outbursts

Things they are never prepared for:

Open sores

[headspace-hotel]

This post: "Thinking back to the good early days before my skin grew back"

Me: off to a compelling start

[crimepit-deactivated20200606]

[sneefss-deactivated20180126]

unironically one of the funniest things i think ive ever seen on this fucking website and yes im going to reblog this like every other day

[littlegermanboy]

guys i just got the best anon ever idk if i can post this i want to keep it framed in my inbox forever.

[littlegermanboy]

i can’t choose a favorite part of this it’s all so good.

[imsadperiod]

[bonerpill-deactivated20230602]

[costumersupportdept]

no no, I know what you're thinking but it's actually amazingly great, keep watching.

[samgirl98]

Oh wow did not see that coming

[massacre-girlypop]

The kind of public service announcements humans SHOULD be watching.

[probabilitydirigible]

I love media where a bunch of guys go into a cursed place where everything is fucked up, and then one by one they become fucked up. Love their little journals like “Day 28… Hector is worms now. Beginning to question our mission??”