Transfem Confessions 🩷

A ranting space for the trans women/transfeminine people of tumblr! No judgement here 🌸

[tfem-confessions]

Hello, Everyone!!!

Some of you may already know me, I am Isabell 🌺.

I am a 24 year old, perisex and nonbinary trans woman. I am not white, and my pronouns are She/Her. I will be signing off with 🌺

I wanted to say, welcome to Wolfe, our new co-runner!

Hello! I’m Wolfe, the co-runner of this blog. I’m 19, and I am an intersex transfemmasc BIPOC woman. My pronouns are shi/hir! I’ll be signing off with 🐺!

As it was before:

This blog is heavily focused towards transfeminine experiences, but transneut and nonbinary lovelies are always welcome. Please know you are very welcome here and I appreciate your contribution, even if this is geared to trans women and transfems <3.

These asks can be to do with daily life, partners (though no detailed sex, this blog IS open to minors.) and it can be joy, anger, or any other messy emotion.

We will do our level best to keep this blog will be kept judgement free, and will be deleting any kind of rude comments/hate or bad faith interpretations.

Please be aware that we will not be answering any asks that are discourse-oriented as of 15th Feb 2025. Venting about your individual experiences is fine, but straight-up trying to discourse with us will not be allowed. This is for the safety, comfort and wellness of both us as blogrunners and our lovely users. We want as many people as possible to feel safe and secure with us, and we can’t do that if we’re platforming polarising statements. Thank you.

This blog is inspired by @tmasc-confessions but is not a perfect mirror

Please note to hold space for your intersex siblings.

Bigotry of any kind will not be tolerated

[tfem-confessions]

Taken Icons:

🫧⚜️🌊💜

Note:

🐺mod - permanently inactive

[tfem-confessions]

HI!!

Attention, everyone who follows this blog. I'm Isabel, as you know.

Quite a few of you may have seen the doxxer who is currently at large in the tranandrophobia tag. This is deplorable behavious, and many of the people they are targetting are poc, or otherwise vulnerable.

Please join me in mass-reporting them for this horrible breach of privacy

In cases like this, a first and last name can be reported as contact information, and with enough reports we can get this taken down and let trans bloggers feel safe again, expecially the poc.

[tfem-confessions]

White.

WHERE?!!?! 😱😱😱😱

[tfem-confessions]

is it weir to feel like a name that was never technically your name is like a dead name for you?

like i used to go by daniel online (safety<3) & its not my name but it is still s name i went by and i was called & idk for me it just feels like one

Nope not weird at all. If the name was used previously and you feel a connection to it, like a deadname thats absolutely valid. If it helps, many asian-americans have both english deadnames (which was never technically their name) and their 'actual' deadnames, so you're not alone!

[tfem-confessions]

not really transfem but i just wanted to say that i love you girls <3 yall are amazing, keep doing what youre doing

Aww thank youuu

[tfem-confessions]

can you be like.. transfem trans man? like.. im transitioning to a man, kind of, then to femininity.

i dont know, i feel connected to the transfem label but idk if i can use it.

im not intersex, that’s why im asking tbh

I don't really think so tbh. Transfem is more of a description of a social category than a gender.

[tfem-confessions]

I forget people see me as a girl a lot, and then my dad calls me babygirl or his daughter and I'm like . oh yeah .

Awww! That sounds nice (assuming you like it from the tone sorry if my reading is off). Its really sweet when people see you as your chosen gender, and its often like a pleasant surprise when it comes up casually

-🌺

[tfem-confessions]

I want to be a woman but I don’t want to have to call myself straight. I still,like,guys in a gay way! But I’m not one...

Thats absolutely fine dear <3! In my home country, this was particularly common, and it still is a wide spread identity choice across the globe.

I believe these days the word for it is 'turigirl' if you choose to adopt that, but even then, you absolutely don't have to.

-🌺

[tfem-confessions]

hate the insistence that to be tfem is to be male.. like fuck me (an agenital person with mixed hormones) i guess . .

!!!

The idea that to be tfem is to be male is inherently transmisogynistic and intersexist and its quite sad that this is used as cis people's introduction to transness. Its just throwing our sisters (Especially intersex ones) under the bus

[tfem-confessions]

intersex transfem girlboy culture is being sad that you feel like you're the only one with this unique experience, but also feeling ashamed for explaining your gender journey & goals

Oh dear. Yeah it sucks how much society hates different and unique experiences. I hope you keep going and have the chance to feel proud <3

[tfem-confessions]

intersex person here- i love this blog! it's so nice being able to see transfemme experiences without being blasted with the Intersexism Beam. followed!

Aww thank you! Love wolfe and other intersex siblings and sisters <3

[tfem-confessions]

transfemme harrassment campaigns are a genuine blight. People will take literally any excuse they can to tear down a trans woman who has managed to claw back any modicum of social capital and it shows.

Yeah, it's honestly really upsetting. People are so eager to destroy a transfem's life

-🐺

[tfem-confessions]

Weird question, but do you mind if non-transfemmes follow this blog? I’m transmasc and want to learn about all trans experiences but idk if that would feel like an invasion.

Everyone is welcome to follow us!!

-🐺

[tfem-confessions]

ok this is gonna sound really bad but whatever i need to get it off my chest

i’m kinda glad my grandma’s getting alzheimer’s

like yeah it’s a horrible disease and i wouldn’t wish it on anyone but she used to be so awful to me after i came out. always calling me by my deadname, “correcting” people when they used the right pronouns, saying shit like “you’ll always be my grandson” with that fake sweet tone that made it even worse

but now she’s forgetting things like a lot. and somehow that means she’s also forgetting that i “used to be a boy” and now she just calls me “sweetie” and uses she/her without blinking. she asked me if i was dating anyone and if he was nice and i didn’t even know how to react. it caught me so off guard

i know it’s just her memory slipping but honestly it’s the first time i’ve ever felt like she saw me. and i hate that it took her literally losing her mind for her to treat me like a normal human being but at the same time… it feels kind of peaceful? like i’m not constantly bracing for impact around her anymore

i feel guilty for feeling this way but also kind of relieved. and maybe that makes me a bad person but idk. it just is what it is

thanks for letting me vent

That's a really tough position to be in, but I completely understand the conflicting relief and guilt. I'm sorry that you're in that situation, and I don't think you're a bad person at all.

-🐺

[tfem-confessions]

My friend (they/them) has hyperandrogenic PCOS and wants to know if they can identify as transfem. I've tried my best to search on the Internet for them, but there hasn't been much luck.

I saw this blog and thought that asking y'all might help. Thanks in advance for any help/advice!

I would say so! I'll put this up for other people to comment their thoughts too, though.

-🐺

[tfem-confessions]

i feel like every time i turn around this site is doing another horrible thing against trans people and its really hard fucking hard, man (used in the general not at anyone)

atp i may just start only using listography, its the only chill place left (this is hardly a social media you just posts lists)

Yeah, things are dicey on tumblr.com recently 💔

-🐺

[tfem-confessions]

I hate that as an intersex transfem AFAB I can't have a say in the community at all. Because I'm not transfem enough, despite having experienced lots of transmisogyny irl and lots of dysphoria. My voice just doesn't matter

It can be really frustrating when perisex transfems don't show up and support their intersex siblings, for sure. I'm sorry that you're going through this, and I hope you're able to at least find a small foothold in the community that does value your voice. They do exist!

-🐺