The Life Of Teachers

I have the patience of a saint and the stubbornness of an ass.

[that-teacher-life]

Things you only hear at daycare:

“Stop licking the walls.”

[bright-haired-teacher]

waaaaaaayyyyy too many kids are here for the last day of school

[thingsmk1120sayz]

[that-teacher-life]

Hey guys, it’s been a while.

If anyone is still listening, now is the time. Teachers need to step up and start fighting back. I’m done with active shooter drills and hearing about mass murder of children. Time to stand up for ourselves. Who’s with me?

[feyremoon]

Soooo tired of being walked all over at work. My classroom always gets the shit end of everything bc I don’t complain. But I’m literally in tears out of frustration because all ten of my kids were asleep and they decided to give me two more kids who were screaming their heads off, effectively disturbing my entire napping class. I have one other teacher with me and 12 toddlers. I was given extra kids so they other toddler class that has THREE TEACHERS could be at 6 kids. WHY. Our ratio is 1:6. I am maxed out so that the other toddler class has 2 extra teachers. I’m so done. I honestly feel like I need a new job.

[that-teacher-life]

Honestly same. Not exactly, but same.

[that-teacher-life]

Hi everyone! I apologize for not posting as much as I used to; it seems life has gotten in the way of itself. Working, planning my own wedding, watching my grandmother go in and out of the hospital, maintaining my relationships, and trying desperately to get enough food, water, and sleep has left me with almost zero spoons of energy to use for my online presence.

This isn’t one of those hiatus-announcement posts, nor am I deleting this blog. I’m simply letting everyone know that I will post when I have the energy, and yes, I am still teaching.

Thank you to all of my almost 3,000 followers! Stay classy, educhums.

[mrsdavis-takesonthird]

Today I told my kids that I’m getting married (had to explain the word “engaged” first) and, as expected, their reactions were priceless. Here are some of the best responses I got today:

-A collective gasp and/or squeal from every girl in the room.

-“Does this mean you’re going to be pregnant soon too?” No. “Well once you have a husband you get pregnant.” No, I have you guys and you all are like my kids. “But we didn’t come out of your belly! You have to have actual kids!”

-“I’ll ask my mom if I can come to your wedding. Since she already met you she will probably say yes.”

-“You’re going to have to kiss him at the wedding. You know that, right?” (Chorus of “ew”s and giggles followed)

-What’s his name? Can he come visit us one day?

-*one of my boys, who is an old soul trapped in a 7 year old’s body, realizing that his teacher is an actual person* *giggles* “He probably thinks you’re beautiful!” *more giggles*

Sometimes my job is extremely entertaining 😂

[just-shower-thoughts]

Every single odd number has an “e” in it.

[savvygunner]

[violetnpurple]

LISTEN-

[bl6ckwoman]

Not all of them. 30 and 50 aren’t spelled with the letter e in it …

[antiandrogen]

[teamnowalls-deactivated20180918]

father god 

[abrown16]

…if you can split a number in half evenly, it’s even. 30 and 50 are odd.

[antiandrogen]

[ethereal-sketches]

-_-’

(15+15=30

25+25=30)

[britteryikes]

25+25 = 30? You sure about that??

[laurdlannister-kingslayer]

Lord have mercy….

[kumasenpai]

Bye

[mf-johnson-deactivated20190605]

3 days into 2018 smh

[kwantsu]

LMAOOOOOOO

[effigyofubiquity-deactivated202]

[lizzysarai-deactivated20190109]

One

Three

Five

Nine

And since everything else after that is a variant of these numbers, then all odds have the letter ‘E’.

[britteryikes]

🗣YOU FORGOT SEVEN!!

[thxrsdxy]

It keeps getting worse.

[e-wifey-deactivated20201128]

LMAOOO WHAT IS GOING ON

[ellsworthej]

[goldensweetcheeks-deactivated20]

My head hurts…

[skullprincess]

This is why that Tumblr University shit was the dumbest idea ever just look at this

[drankinwatahmelin]

who failed yall?

[microtear-deactivated20181213]

IM SCREAMING

[lukestarkillerisgay]

[hey-hey-shutthefuckup-deactivat]

You whole ass forgot about eight - a number with an e and is pretty fucking even

[shaolinbynature]

why would 8 be brought up if it’s EVEN in a post about ODDS??????? the post said “every single ODD number has an ‘e’ in it” not “every single number with an ‘e’ is odd” what the fuck

[emma-d-klutz]

3 days until 2019 and we’re still here

[thivus]

this thread is my last brain cell trying it’s best in math class

[jacobtheloofah]

anyone in this thread play fortnite

[sodomymcscurvylegs]

This post beat me to death.

[locusvulpi]

Two is technically odd and doesn’t have an e in it CHECKMATE!

[sodomymcscurvylegs]

[rawmasshole-deactivated20250107]

AHSHCJDNRJENFIGIRJSI

[roujon]

y’all know what odd means?

[that-teacher-life]

The entirety of the teacher community here is cringing.

[lifeinkinder]

Sitting here drinking applesauce with a straw as one does.

[that-teacher-life]

Cheers, friend. Drinkable food is the best.

[that-teacher-life]

After a week of uncooperative parents, screeching temper tantrums, extremely sick children, and one kind parent who brought us all tea, cookies, candles, and lip balm...

I’m finally on vacation.

[fuckingflying]

I hate linguistic anthropology. Why? One of the most influential experiments in linguistic anthropology involved teaching a chimp asl. One of the most influential linguistics is named Noam Chomsky. You know what the chimp’s name was?

Nim Chimpsky.

Fucking monkey pun.

And this is in textbooks, in documentaries, everywhere. And everyone just IGNORES THIS GOD AWFUL PUN cause of how important the experiment was. But

BUT LOOK AT THIS SHIT. FUCKING NIM CHIMPSKY. I HATE THIS WHOLE FIELD.

[dr-dendritic-trees]

Its not just the linguistic anthropologists.

There’s a group of very important genes that determine if your body develops in the right shape/organization… they are called the hedgehog genes, because fruit fly geneticists are all ridiculous.  The different hedgehog genes are all named after different hedgehogs.  And then someone decided to get clever and name one “sonic hedgehog” because this is just what fruitfly geneticists do.

Well sonic hedgehog controls brain development, and now actual doctors are stuck in the position of explaining to grieving parents that their child’s lethal birth defects or life-threatening tumors are caused by a “sonic hedgehog mutation”.

And this is why no one will invite the fruit fly people to parties.

[error-404-fuck-not-found]

Biogeochemical scientists, upon discovering the complex mechanisms that govern the storage and use of molecular iron on our planet, decided to call this cycle “the ferrous wheel”.  We groaned about that for at least five solid minutes.

[callmegallifreya]

The phenomenon of sneezing when exposed to sudden bright light is called an Autosomal-dominant Compelling Helio Opthalmic Outburst. ACHOO.

Half a byte of data is a nibble.

[cluegrrl]

An unidentified, repetitive computer error is called a Bug, because the first one of those they discovered to be the fault of a moth fluttering against the vacuum tubes. I think we need to admit that academics and engineers are lonely, stressed people whose brains go funny places when deprived of sleep and fed too much coffee instead.

[that-teacher-life]

Facts I’ve learned the hard way in the last 2 weeks:

12 is too many babies to have in one room that’s certified for 8.

Chocolate is not a hard reset.

“We’ll figure it out,” is not a solution to a problem.

Parents that regularly send their child to school with high fevers cannot be bothered by anything.

Parents that complain that their child’s teachers are in school with a mild cold are bothered by everything.

I really enjoy learning about linguistics.

[bombing]

what is it with toddlers and personal space? if this little bald asshole touches my knee one more time i’m launching him across the parking lot

[just-shower-thoughts]

It is an unspoken rule that if a little kid is hiding under a blanket or couch cushions, you are required to comment on how lumpy the blanket is and pretend to sit on it to try and “smooth it out.”

[tgmember]

Also, if you’re playing hide-and-seek with them, it is critical that you search every other possible (and impossible) hiding spot, all the while wondering out loud how they managed to disappear just like magic, before walking right past their hiding spot.

[the-catholic-geek]

And if a baby starts playing peekaboo you are required to act surprised when they show their face again

[pornhubstepmom-deactivated20191]

If a kid hands you a phone, you answer it

[a-trashcan-made-out-of-fandoms]

If a kid shoots you with a Nerf Gun you are supposed to Die a dramatic death and explain “ugh you shot me blaahh”

[gobbochune-deactivated20241018]

when you push a kid on the swings ya gotta do the woosh

[zetsubonna]

I literally just blocked about a dozen people on this post for being cranky about children.

Being a joyless shitbeast to kids isn’t cool. They’re kids. If you want to be Oscar the Grouch, that’s fine, but do it in a way they understand and explain it to them.

“I don’t want to play, I’m grumpy. Thank you, though, that was kind.”

It’s literally not hard. Kids are small people. Treat them with common fucking decency.

[teaboot]

Lmao one time my kid brother handed me his plastic Elmo phone and said it was for me so I staged an entire conversation with Big Bird, it was the best

[fangirlinginleatherboots]

teaching children that they are allowed to walk away and cool off if they are feeling overwhelmed might literally save their life as teens/adults

[mullersturtleneck]

I am a preschool teacher.

This is my “alone zone.”

At any time of the day, if my kids are feeling stressed, they can go here to cool down. There’s stress toys, silly putty, bubbles, sensory bottles…there’s books and headphones to block out the loud noises.

The only thing they have to do is “check in” by putting their picture on which emotion they’re feeling so I know how I can help them when they’re ready.

Kids. Need. Space.

Kids. Need. Coping. Mechanisms.

Not. Time-outs.

And the sooner we as adults teach them that, the better off they’ll be as they grow.

[anunusualvisitor]

Seeing this kind of thing… fills me with many emotions

[thealpacalypse-archive]

sure i guess sex is okay but have you ever closed a dozen tabs after finishing an academic paper

[runfast-livefearless]

I got chills just thinking about this

[programmerhumour]

Pure savage