It’s Anna Kay, and I’ve been writing for a good chunk of my life. But unfortunately, I fall off the tracks more times than I want to admit. I enjoy writing but I’m a perfectionist and never think they’re good enough, and because of that I haven’t finished anything in 4 years.
Now I currently have a one shot in the making for a certain red head S-rank. I don’t want to name names incase I fall off the track for the billionth time…
I will be accepting requests for the characters listed below for Drabbles, no more than 500 words. Just to get me back into writing again.
Synopsis: Nanami couldn't resist the cute nerdy girl in his accounting class, but will she be everything he hoped for on a date on February 14th?
Tags: Fluff, very basic knowledge of fish, my source is wikipedia
Word Count: 1.5k
You were not what Nanami Kento expected. At all.
When he had first seen you, he’d expected a shy, quiet girl. One of those who blushes at the smallest compliments and stumbles over her words. Your comfy cardigans and the Sanrio pins on your bag were a clear give away that you were a sweet person, and he adored the little shark keychain hanging from the zip. He was gone the second he saw you, tapping your pen against the desk in your shared finance lecture.
Now, Nanami Kento was a confident man. He was smart and well put together – and boy did he know it. But being a smart, academics focused man in college shockingly did not make him popular. It was a baffling concept, a man being in college... to learn. Cue the gaggle of disgusted women who will inevitably fall for the same roster of frat men. Because all healthy relationships start in a fraternity.
All things considered, it was safe to say that Nanami Kento kept very much to himself. Which is why it was weird when he sat beside you in a lecture one day. He didn’t say anything, didn’t ask for a pen, or notes; didn’t makes jokes or try to get your attention; didn’t bother you at all. He just... sat there. It became a little tradition that neither of you would acknowledge. You’d sit together and yet still somehow separately, and then completely ignore each other if you saw each other on campus.
Nanami loved it.
Truly. Loved it. He didn’t have to carry conversations, he didn’t have to explain the work to you, and he didn’t have to put on an act. And yet... he just couldn’t seem to get you out of his mind. It’d gone unnoticed at first – his little crush on you – in fact, he’d had no clue until you didn’t show up to class one day. Normally, the blonde man wouldn’t have noticed the absence of his classmate, but the empty seat where you should be was the biggest distraction he’d ever faced.
It was annoying. He was supposed to be focused. He prided himself on being focused. Yet he missed the entire lecture worth of context, information about empirical finance and corporate valuation completely passed him by. All his poor mind could focus on was your absence. The desk was emptier than usual, no aquatic shaped post-it notes, no notepads covered in shiny fish stickers, no pens with stingray toppers. Just an empty desk, completely devoid of marine life and whimsy.
He needed to tell someone about this odd development. I mean, it was an obvious cause for concern. Maybe he had some sort of brain injury. That was the only plausible explanation for his sudden lack of focus. So, he turned to his friend.
Well, friend was a loose word for his relationship with Gojo Satoru. The white-haired man was less a friend and more a general nuisance. They’d been flatmates briefly in their first year of university, and Gojo had been stuck to him since. Like an itch on your hand that won’t go away regardless of how hard you scrape your teeth over your skin. But, he did have experience when it came to women.
Nanami had naively thought that Gojo would help without judgement. What a fool.
“Oh God, Nanamin! This is just precious! You. Have. A. Cruuuuuuuush!”
“Great so I have to avoid her forever so that I can focus on my degree.”
“What?! No! God for someone so smart, you are dense, Nanami.” Gojo didn’t give him time to defend himself before adding “You need to ask her out, bro! It’s perfect! Take her on Valentine’s Day! Take her somewhere nice, dinner and a movie- wait no! Do an activity! Like an art gallery, or a museum, or-”
“The aquarium,” Nanami interrupts, speaking more to himself than Gojo. It was perfect. You always had that cute little fish-themed stationary with you, the aquarium would be a great date. Maybe he could even show off a little if he researched some of the fish. It was perfect. Now he just had to figure out how to ask you out...
When you walked into your next lecture, ready to learn about stocks and bitcoin, you find a note on your desk, because of course Nanami couldn’t ask you himself. The man wore a suit to college and glasses that constantly fell down his nose, if he asked you with words, he’d make a fool of himself.
The note was simple, direct but not intimidating. Carefully worded, clear intentioned, no margin for error.
I noticed the fish stationary you have and was wondering if you’d want to go with the aquarium with me? I’ve got two tickets for February 14th.
It’s a date btw (if that wasn’t clear).
- Nanami Kento
At the bottom are two little boxes. One labelled yes and the other no. Both had been scribbled out like he’d gotten embarrassed at the last minute. That part was a little shocking given Nanami’s normally calm demeanour, but it was endearing. He’d sat away from you in that lecture, only a seat or two away but still far enough to give you space to not pressure you into saying yes. Despite the immaturity of the check boxes, you find yourself smiling. It’s a little endearing even if unexpected. So, you redraw them and check the little ‘yes’ box in your glittery pen before sliding the note across the desk back to him.
After you had agreed to the date Nanami Kento became much more confident. He’d acquired you phone number and made all of the arrangements for the day. Your transport to and from the date (an uber there and he would walk you home), a reservation in the little aquarium restaurant for lunch, a session feeding the penguins with the aquarium staff. Nanami had it all figured out.
His one lapse in judgement came when he excitedly (or excitedly by Nanami’s standards) told Gojo that the plan had worked. At the time it had been an off handed comment, a small ‘she said yes’ before going back to whatever they had been talking about. Gojo hadn’t said much then, a few words of support, but nothing dramatic. That should have been the first warning sign to Nanami that the frat boy was up to something. Yet he remained blissfully unaware. Maybe it was the buzz of securing a date with you, maybe he had naively trusted Gojo to be normal about it.
He would soon realise that Gojo was, in fact, not normal about this. How could he be? Mr Stoicism himself had got himself a date with a girl who uses aquatic stationary. It was adorable and Gojo simple had to meddle.
Which is why when you showed up at the aquarium it was empty. No families, no couples, no children, no one. Just you and Nanami. You weren’t going to question it, maybe everyone just had plans for that day. And besides, it ensured that you would get to see all of your favourite fish up close without fighting through crowds of sticky, hyper, little children. Nanami however, did make a comment that caught your attention. A quiet one, under his breath not meaning for you to hear it.
“God, that nosey idiot-”
You know that he isn’t intending for you to pick up on his grumbling, but you can’t help but interject.
“Who? Did someone do something?”
Nanami went a little quiet at your question, a little amused by the adorable tilt of your head and your curious pout. He held his hand out for you to take as he started guiding you through the entrance of the aquarium.
“Don’t worry about it, sweetheart. Just something my flatmate did. Let’s go see the fish, yeah? I can deal with him later.”
Now, Nanami knew that you liked fish. Anyone who had ever seen your stationary, or your bag, or your whale claw clips, and shark socks knew that you had an affinity for marine life. He knew that. That’s why he had picked the aquarium.
What he couldn’t have ever predicted was the way that you pointed at each individual fish saying their names and how you can tell the difference between the male and female fish. He thought that you were excited before, but your face practically lit up when you saw a pufferfish. It was, quite possible, the cutest thing that Nanami had ever seen.
“Did you see it Nanami? It’s a white-spotted pufferfish! They’re normally like only seen in the indo-pacific region, but a few years ago a young one was seen in the Mediterranean. And they’re nocturnal and solitary in the wild so they’re just out there living, and-”
You cut off your own rambling, realising that it isn’t polite to completely dominate the conversation. Not that Nanami seems to mind. It’s refreshing, not having to lead conversations, not being the smartest one. You’re intelligent, and he loves an intelligent woman. So, instead of laughing at you, or rolling his eyes like he would if Gojo were rambling, he points at another fish.
“You know much about that one?”
“That one? It’s a blue tang, like Finding Dory. I mean, the proper name is ‘Paracanthurus hepatus’ and—”
A/N: I wanted to write about so many more fish but I could feel myself becoming absorbed and I don't have time for another special interest right now.
Also I wanted to say a huge thank you for 100 followers, it's insane to me, i love you all so so so much
Big big thanks to @sixxels for reading this, helping me out, and giving me the opportunity to do this. Eternally grateful xxx
Thanks to @kixxtie , @carienations , @rainlina , and @dollhousesinner for indulging me and telling me about your favourite fish
Thanks to @fricks for having such raw sex appeal xoxo
Please do not reupload or feed into AI
Thanks to all of you for reading, liking, reblogging, and commenting. I love you all so so so much.
If you've read this far feel free to send me asks, I love to yap.
Warnings: 18+. NONCON. FORCED IMPREGNATION. Unprotected p-in-v. Arranged marriage. Throatfucking. Face-slapping. Breeding kink. Praise and degradation. Age gap. Dacryphilia. Fear play. Omitting one tag to avoid spoiling the ending—please read at your own risk.
Note: Silphium and pennyroyal (or ‘glechium’) were herbs commonly used for contraceptive purposes in ancient Rome.
Word count: 4.4k
You woke up knowing you were fucked.
In more ways than one: today brought your husband home from his latest campaign in Germania, and last week, your only batch of contraceptives was running low. Now, it was gone. You cursed the apothecary who had sworn she would procure your silphium drink before you were to see the General again, but presently, there was nothing more to be done. You had tracked your cycle and knew you were ovulating that week. You just hoped your husband would be too battle-weary and overwrought to seek a place in his bed, between your own legs, tonight.
‘Down’ came the order before the door to your chambers had even closed behind Marcus Acacius later that day.
Down meant he wanted you lying back.
Down meant your thighs had better be spread apart by the time he reached the bed. He wasn’t a patient man.
Down meant your meticulous menstrual contrivances had all been for nothing; you had been married to the General for almost a year, and in that time, you had promised yourself you would never bear him a child. While the only reason for your being forced to wed in the first place was to give him a son, you despised the idea of being the Emperor’s pawn. A vessel for the next awful bloodlusting boy to be born—you had been a present from your uncle Geta to Acacius, and ever since then, you had come to hate them both. You drank your herbal teas daily, without them ever knowing, and you feigned ignorance when, after months and months of the General’s best efforts, you never fell pregnant by him.
Today might very well be the day to change all that, if you had to judge by the look in your husband’s eyes, though.
The harsh, dark irises were alight as he approached you. Their gaze betrayed little more intrigue—or curiosity to know how you had been these last three weeks he was gone—than sheer lust. You could see it in his movements while he peeled his armor apart and drank your body in.
He shrugged the last scrap of metal and fabric away and climbed over you in bed. His motions were graceless, and his body was heavy. He smelled of dirt and blood.
“Wider,” he told you.
Wider your legs spread. He slipped between them, and with an affectionless, rough grip, he grabbed your wrist.
“Touch,” he commanded.
You obeyed that, too. Your fingers were guided to, and wrapped gingerly around, the thick, warm base you had come to know well since marrying Acacius. He pulsed proudly beneath your hand, and the grunt he gave said he was expecting this the whole long while he had been away. You stroked him slowly. Firmly. Contemplating.
“My love—” you started, low.
“Quiet.” Your husband’s voice swiftly supplanted yours.
It bid you to do as you were told, and open your mouth for nothing else but to pleasure the appendage you held.
You knew better than to speak in moments like these. But you also feared, for very good reason, that if you didn’t interject now, you may never get a chance to prevent this dreaded thing. It would only get harder.
He would only get harder.
“Husband,” you tried more warmly, stroking his cock as though you loved him, like weren’t repulsed by the thought of birthing his son. You forced your gaze up, too.
And no sooner had you done that when a hand landed across your face. Your cheek flamed; your skin bristled.
“My sweet wife insists on being heard, does she?” the General broke in, and you could tell it was through teeth, “Does it look like I’ve even begun to fuck you yet, girl?”
You shook your head that it didn’t. Your face stung, and you were about to look away when you felt the same hand that had delivered the last blow take your chin.
The General tilted it back up to his.
You felt him harden even more seeing tears start to well.
“Whatever it is, tell me after. I’ve waited too long for this.”
From his tone, you could tell that meant more than sex.
An heir.
He must have known you were withholding something.
Your hand moved quicker. More nervously. Worrying.
“Allow me to…to use my mouth, then. I-In other ways.” You hated even saying it. Your voice trembled as you did.
Silently, you braced yourself for another hit. Your wrist worked relentlessly, moving up and down the man’s shaft with little more intelligible thought in your head than the fear of being punished by him, when it stopped.
The General halted all movements of your hand. He eyed you once, uncaring, and then shook his head. The next thing you knew, you were being shoved off of the bed.
You never thought you would feel such relief sinking to your knees on the floor. You were good at this—could finish your husband off in under two minutes, easy—and for once, you were happy to feel the man’s fist in your hair. Holding you firm, guiding you fast, and being his normal gruff, callous self to force you onto his cock.
He filled your mouth quickly. Though it might not have meant much to a girl who had never seen, much less sucked, a dick in her life before becoming a wife, Marcus was big. He fit uncomfortably between your lips and stretched your jaw until it ached. At length, you let him move your face up and down, again and again, wetting his shaft with your slick, shiny, delicate strings of saliva. You almost felt grateful to be made to move so fast, so your tongue couldn’t get fully acquainted with his taste. You gagged lightly when he shoved you down to the base. Your eyes rolled back; his belly grazed your nose.
“You look better when I’m in you,” Marcus said coldly.
He dragged your head back, and you inhaled a breath. Your eyes rose to his, and he smiled—he saw tears again.
You blinked and let your expression fall limply, knowing how much he loved seeing you weak. You took the tip between the seam of your lips, and you kissed it once. Then you kissed it again. Your mind grew dizzy with the idea that you might actually get to swallow his load and be left alone the rest of the night if you only kept going.
You opened wider to do just that when next you heard:
“You’ll look better with my child inside you.”
As if galvanized by some sharp, unseen electric current, you wrapped your lips around his head. Fully. You tried enveloping the rest with your mouth, desperate to get your husband’s mind off of putting himself anywhere but at the back of your throat, and you hummed. The man above you gladly pushed himself further. You choked.
And just when you were about to force a breath through your nose, flatten your tongue and prepare to go deeper on the man you disliked most in this world, you felt him coax your gaze up to him. Tears were streaming down your cheeks at this point. You had to blink once or twice to even see him. When you had, you found him beaming.
For once, the General’s gaze was soft as he watched you.
You felt him tug your hair forward, and your lips went with it. Your throat resisted at first, but then it relented. In just a few moments, he was sliding down your throat.
You felt powerless. Your husband seemed to know.
“We’ve been unlucky, haven’t we?” he asked.
Surely, the question was meant to be rhetorical, for you couldn’t move your mouth without gagging on his cock.
Instead, you blinked. More tears flowed down your face.
“Nearly a year of being my wife, and still no child.” If you hadn’t known better, you might’ve taken him for contrite.
He sounded like he could’ve been forlorn, but the tone he used was too smooth. Slow. His voice was like molasses, almost. And then he moved his hips and sank in deeper. Your throat opened because it had no say in the matter.
You blinked harder, and more tears fell.
Please cum, please cum, please cum—
“I have it on good authority that a girl your age should be as fertile as anything. It shouldn’t take this long to take.”
—just finish, just finish, just finish where you are.
Marcus shifted again, and this time, you couldn’t control the spasm in your throat. You just coughed, and sputtered, and gagged down his length. You jerked your head pathetically under his hold, and just barely were you able to steal a gasp of air. The man loosened up.
And though his touch was less tight, his voice almost soft, and his eyes as bright as they had ever been, the words that followed after struck your senses like a fire.
Practically searing the insides of your skull when it came:
“You wouldn’t happen to know why that is, would you?”
You would’ve liked to swallow, but your esophagus was too chock-full of cock. Your lips were stretched, tongue flattened along his length, and your cheeks were now glistening with tears—from the strain of your husband’s intrusion, for one, and the fear of what he might already know, for another. You felt the head of his cock slide deeper down your wet and velvety channel before carving a path back up. Its ascent was slow. Teasing.
The fingers that were threaded through your hair held your head in place as he withdrew all the way to the tip.
“Answer me, wife.”
When you hesitated, the General slapped you again. His cock fell out of your mouth, and you coughed reflexively.
“I-I-I don’t…I don’t know what—”
“Think harder.”
A hit was shortly delivered to the other side of your face. You flinched, and winced, and right before you tried answering again, you felt your jaw forced open for something else. Rather than being made to let words fill the space, your husband’s cock was thrust in. It went far.
Your mouth was leaking with drool now. You couldn’t contain the spit. If anything, the General seemed to enjoy that as he slid himself further. Then he grunted.
“Why is it I’ve filled you with enough cum to paint the fucking Coliseum, and you still haven’t give me a son?”
You gagged. Your hands flew to his strong, bare thighs to grab the flesh out of habit, and once again, he withdrew.
“Why?!”
“I don’t know!”
Of course you did.
Still, you shook your head and kept your gaze plastered on his, begging for some shred of lenience. If he’d had any within him, you reckoned you weren’t seeing it that day. Before you could stop him, the General forced his way back into your mouth, and shortly down your throat.
“I think you’re a lying—” He jerked his hips once, to stab the very back of that place, “—pathetic fucking whore.”
You tried to whine in protest, but the sound was shortly muffled by his cockhead gliding back and forth in that wet, fleshy passage. Its path was suffocating. Your eyes almost rolled back from how fucking awful he tasted.
Please, please, your nails scratched at his legs like some kind of wordless entreaty. Your gaze was glossy and wet.
You could scarcely muster the strength to meet his own, but when you did, you found your husband smiling back.
He slid out of your mouth, and you could breathe again.
“We’ll try once more,” he said, pulling you up to your feet by your armpits, like he might treat a toy he didn’t like. When you were standing upright between his legs, you felt a shudder pass through your frame, and you tried to hide it. He leaned in: “Why haven’t you given me a son?”
“My body must not be r-ready.”
Wrong answer, apparently.
He slapped you again.
By now, your face was blooming with pain. Your skin stung, and your eyes burned, and you could still feel a trace of his precum trickling down your throat, and you hated him so much. But you had to be stoic. Insensitive.
Inventive.
“Silphium,” you stuttered out, before swallowing the awful tang you sensed and recollecting yourself, barely, “Pennyroyal, too. I hear there are…concoctions that help to make the womb more…more…hospitable, I believe.”
You were lying through your fucking teeth. Knowing your husband was far too dense and war-crazed to have ever consulted an apothecary in his life, and hoping he’d be stupid enough to accept whatever it was you said. When it came to things concerning your health, he rarely cared.
You swallowed hard and for once, felt a little more stable.
Then you were shoved onto the bed again, and any semblance of composure was sucked from your bones. You fell pathetically against the plush, satin covers of maroon and gold and were prone for no more than two seconds before the General started tearing your clothes.
“We’ll see,” he said simply.
He flipped you onto your back, and you writhed without really meaning to. You were operating on pure instinct, feeling a man nearly three times your age moving his hands across your front and ripping fabric left and right. It wasn’t fair. You could hold your tongue if he hit you hard enough, but your muscles fared worse when it came to constraining their natural inclinations. You kicked your feet, you squealed, then you begged him—
“Please, stop! I’m not ready yet! I can’t— I can’t— STOP!”
This was just like your wedding night. Only worse, because you knew exactly what lay in store with harrowing clarity and certainty. The General grinned.
“Pennyroyal, huh?” he sneered, yanking your clothes away while you thrashed and tried to push his hands off, “Is that what my wife needs to be ‘ready’ to bear sons?”
“Yes!”
“Silphium?”
“Please, please.”
There were fresh tears brimming in your eyes when he peeled the last scrap of covering off of your body and shoved you back down. You were shaking, and he was smiling, and as much as you knew the man hated being defied, you reckoned he took pleasure from the chase. Seeing the moisture well up and spill, feeling you crawl back in bed, meet his greedy, calloused hands and beg him over and over again not to make you do it, not now.
You could hardly even see him through your tears, but you felt him. Sensed his lower half forcing its way between your legs and then his member coming to rest on your belly. You squirmed at the feeling of your spit still coating him, and now brushing against you. You sobbed.
“You can’t keep forcing yourself inside me—”
“I can.”
“Won’t make a baby stick if you just—”
“I will.”
You felt betrayed. All your life you’d been force-fed these sunny, sanguine ideals of what motherhood was going to be, and this was all it was? After cherishing that prized thing between your thighs—like virginity were some real gift to be given—for so long, this is who owned it now? The General hadn’t had so much as a fraction of the compassion or patience a wife needed to feel secure. He didn’t treasure you, or care for your pleasure, or do anything to soothe the ache of his repeated intrusions. You couldn’t begin to think what he’d be like as a father.
Presently, he smoothed your hair from your face; not to comfort you any, but to make sure that he could see your expression when he sank himself in. When he took again.
“We’ll have to seek the Emperor’s best,” he murmured.
Your husband gripped one of your knees, and at the same time, held himself. You felt his thick, leaking head trail from your navel to your pubic bone, down exactly where you wanted him least. You tried to protest, but his grasp on your leg only tightened. He pressed you down into the mattress and wiped his cock between your folds.
“This pennyroyal you mention…” Marcus went on.
For some reason, your legs tensed as he said it.
“Or silphium. Whatever it is. Can we get it?”
His tip teased your soft, swollen clit—a place he rarely cared to touch—and, against your will, your body started.
Some minuscule ripple of pleasure there. You swallowed.
“Yes. We can. Please, just—” You glanced down between your body and the General’s then, and the sight nearly sent your head spinning. He looked so big. And cruel. And dripping with precum across your puffy, wet skin.
He knew this act well. You knew this act well enough, but for some reason, you thought your actions aimed at forestalling the inevitable might succeed this time.
You reached for his wrist, and your eyes pleaded with his.
“Don’t do this again,” you whimpered, feeling pathetic.
The General only shook his head, and he held on tighter.
“As your husband, I’ll do this as often as I please. And you’ll learn to like it, if you just stop fighting,” he said.
He found your dripping entrance, like he always did.
“Just let me in. Let me feel her, honey, I deserve it.”
You shook your head, but he pushed on anyway. Your stomach clenched, your walls tensed, and, in spite of your body’s strongest attempts, your husband notched the first inch of himself inside. He let out a happy sigh.
“That’s it. That’s a good wife,” he told you contentedly.
His girth was too much. It was always too much. No matter how slow he went, or how much you tried to prepare yourself, it always hurt. You whimpered at that feeling and had to bite your bottom lip to keep the sound from slipping out. Marcus nodded and kissed your cheek
“Sweet girl. ‘S’all she needed, see? One little inch, or—”
His words were cut short. Then he thrust in all the way.
“—eight, maybe.”
You shrieked and met his palm. It clamped over your lips.
That first stroke was torture. Dragging back was even worse. Re-sheathing himself and making you listen to his wretched grunts and groans of pleasure was pure agony.
“Will the herbs help? Pussy feels plenty ready to me.”
He was mocking you now. Your whines were stifled under his hand and your walls were forced wider for his girth as he sawed back and forth, over and over, without mercy.
“Nod if you want it,” he panted, “Nod if you need that.”
You weren’t sure if he meant the herbs or him. Slowly, and knowing he’d hit you if you didn’t, you nodded.
The General grinned. He didn’t hesitate to speak again.
“Good. Now you can stop soliciting apothecaries behind my back and using these same herbs as contraceptives.”
Your stomach dropped. Your eyes widened, though you knew it was a stupid thing to do when the man’s gaze was practically scorching through your own. You froze.
Your husband wedged his cock even deeper, and you felt him in your cervix—unprotected from any medicine now.
Medicine that he knew about, too, apparently.
You had no choice but to whimper when he kept digging his strong hips into yours, repeatedly, battering that soft, sensitive, defenseless place with his dick like he owned it. You wanted to kick your legs but sensed it was useless. General Acacius would get what he wanted.
What he needed was a son. You could see it in his eyes.
“My stupid, silly wife,” the General chided you, now fucking in deeper than he’d done before. Taunting, “I hope our son gets my brain, or the poor boy’s fucked.”
You wanted to cry. You were still sobbing, but the tears had come with such force before that there didn’t seem to be enough moisture in your body to allow them now. Any wetness, it seemed, was inside your legs, allowing your husband to pound into you with complete abandon.
Skin slapped skin. The man’s breaths grew quicker, more frantic, while your own you wished would halt altogether. His hand moved from your mouth to take your chin in his palm; he looked proud as he drilled your soft, limp body.
“Finish. Please,” you whimpered, all fight extinguished.
You didn’t know what else to say. Your husband had caught you, somehow, and probably knew as well as you that your body would now be forced to accept whatever he gave it. When that warm, throbbing member between your legs had had its fill and the man had decided he’d humiliated you enough, he’d paint your insides white. He’d shoot thick, hot ropes of cum where you’d dreaded him most, and in all likelihood, that seed would take. If not today, then tonight, tomorrow or the next day—there was no clear end in sight until the General had secured the heir he so desperately wanted. What Geta promised.
And you would be a mother, whether you liked it or not.
Every subsequent thrust, grunt, and groan rang hollow to you then. It was like your mind was lost from your body, your brain an open wound, and what was left of you simply splayed on that bed. Unmoving. Unfeeling. Being fucked and filled up without a modicum of concern for your humanity. Or what remained, anyway.
When he was finished and he could feel your body stuffed with his greedy, sticky release, the General leaned down and planted a kiss on your forehead.
He seemed more confident than ever as he spoke.
“I can feel my legacy has already been cemented.”
As it turned out, a month was enough.
Within the year, you gave birth to a son.
This was no great shock to you—getting forcefucked every night for five weeks straight would’ve done the trick for any woman in your position, you supposed.
What surprised you most was how gentle the General became after learning you were pregnant with his child. Ever the paragon of paternal affection and husbandly devotion to you from that moment forward, you were convinced the man had been transformed overnight. He never spoke so much as an unkind word to you, or gave a glance that said anything less than that he was in love and elated to help you bring new life into this world. He never forced himself on you in bed. You could sleep again
One morning, you were cradling your baby in your arms. In just a few short weeks, you had already memorized every inch of his soft, sweet face. And you knew from the first you’d never love a single creature more on this earth
When your husband approached, you smiled—beaming.
“How is my son?” came the deep warble of his voice.
You drew the blanket back an inch with just your finger; beneath the soft cloth, the two of you could see that the infant was sleeping peacefully. He made a delicate sound, and you were half-certain you could hear the General’s heart splintering in two along with it. He dropped to his knees beside you, where he leaned in near and let his eyes say all the rest. They were cheery. Wet.
Sometimes, you, too, enjoyed seeing him cry.
You pet his wavy grey locks and gave them a tug.
“Is he exactly as you pictured? Your legacy?” You smiled.
Marcus blinked, letting two warm tears trickle down.
“Better than I could have dreamed him myself.”
That made your heart swell with a still larger ache. This was all your husband had ever wanted—wrapped up in your arms and swaddled with wool. Your son looked like him, too. You could see the General’s appreciation of this every time his eyes fell to the child, and every time his gaze drifted to you. There was admiration. Adoration.
Love, for once.
“Will he be a soldier like his father?” you asked next.
“A much braver one than I ever was.”
“Will he do Emperor Geta proud by this calling?”
Once more, your husband’s eyes flitted from the baby up to you. His look was soft as he reached out for your hand.
“There isn’t a doubt in my mind of that, my love.”
You squeezed his palm. You couldn’t help yourself.
“And will he carry the Acacius family name with pride?”
At that, the General’s hesitation was even shorter than the last. He swiftly confirmed that his son would, indeed, wear his name like a badge of honor. There wasn’t a shred of uncertainty on that front, he assured you.
His smile was so wide you couldn’t help but mirror it.
Even as you slid the knife from in between the folds of your son’s blanket, you were smiling at him all the while.
“And what if he doesn’t?” you asked quietly.
The General’s gaze fell to the blade next.
You thought he might die on the spot.
“What if he bears no name at all?”
The serrated edge now hovered over the baby’s throat. When Marcus jerked toward the thing, instinctively, you only lowered it more. Brought the silver closer to skin.
“Please— You— you can’t— can’t— can’t— please stop.”
He was fumbling for words. You didn’t blame him.
“Your precious legacy is a fragile thing, General.”
And with that, you drew the knife closer.
Your husband let out a strangled noise.
Right when he rose to knock the weapon out of your hand, you took it and flipped it back around to him.
Your first stab was swift. Into his chest.
“My child will never know your name.”
It was clear the injury stunned him.
When you plunged the knife in again, the man let out another sound—this time, a grunt of pain—and you wedged it deeper. You didn’t flinch when his face twisted
“My son will take my name.”
Frankly, with the trauma your blade had already inflicted on his chest, you didn’t expect the General to be able to say a word. Or resist. By the look of horror in his eyes, you could tell he was capable of listening, though.
Now, he would be forced to hear it all.
See his own life taken away from him.
And feel the blade thrust in when you punctured his front for the third and final time. Your eyes were shining now.
Still cradling your child, still holding his gaze, still smiling like this was the single greatest day you’d lived to see.
~ As the newest and most useless recruit to The Boys, Y/N is tasked with keeping an eye on Soldier Boy while Butcher sorts things out. Annoyed to be given such a ridiculous job, she tries to keep the defrosted supe at arm’s length, but there’s something in the drugs and in his eyes that makes him hard to resist…~
Soldier Boy (Ben) x F!Reader, Hughie Campbell, Billy Butcher
5,426 Words
NSFW, Sexual Acts, Excessive Drug Use, Just NSFW all around…
“I’m going to put my clothes on before you say anything else” for @jacklesversebingo
JacklesBingo Masterlist ~ My Full Masterlist ~ Patreon ~ Published Works
Sunlight illuminated a cloud of bluish-gray smoke and Ben took another hit. He breathed deeply, willing the drugs to seek out every cell in his preternaturally powerful body and corrupt them long enough to give him a little buzz.
It wasn’t easy. It would take enough drugs to kill a mortal for him to feel that sweet high, but excess was a word he wasn’t familiar with.
Eyes closed, he exhaled another stream of musky vapor into the rented room. He felt his brain shift to the left for a quick second as a faint bit of dizziness struck him. He grinned, leaned back against the headboard, and stretched his long legs over the hideous bedspread.
“There it is…”
Another hit boosted his mood and Soldier Boy sighed happily, momentarily at peace.
He cracked open an eye when the bathroom door opened.
He licked his lips when Y/N walked out with a dingy white towel wrapped tight around her damp body; her hair pinned up and safe from the shower.
He whistled when she crossed the room, heading for her duffle bag.
“Fuck off,” she snapped, rolling her eyes as his grew darker and more locked on her form.
Ben chuckled under his breath. “Hey, sweetheart, you can’t walk around naked like that and expect me not to get stiff.”
He shifted on the bed, tugging at his pants to accommodate the growing length against his thigh. She stared at his hand as it teased the shadow creasing the fabric, and swallowed hard. He was gorgeous but the price of a quick romp wasn’t worth the pain in the ass.
He winked.
She groaned. “Asshole.”
“Oh, come on-” Ben took a long pull on the blunt and held it in, voice tight on the inhale. He grabbed his cock. “You know you want some of this.”
“The weed yes…” She turned her back on him, grabbed the bag, and tugged open the noisy zipper. “Your dick… no.”
He scoffed. “You’re shit at lying, Y/N.”
Her cheeks burned but she tried to ignore him as she searched the bag for her clothes. “Am I?”
The wide tip of his pink tongue flashed over his lips and Ben sat up, focusing on her. “Sure are,” he replied, tracing her spine with his gaze. “You’ve been acting like you don’t want to get on your knees, but I know you’re hot as hell for me. You’d suck my dick in a second if I whipped it out right now, wouldn’t you?”
He watched the muscles in her back tighten as she struggled to hide the shiver that slid from head to toe.
“You’re a pig.”
“Maybe.” He shrugged and leaned back again, bringing the joint to his lips. “Don’t mean I’m not right.”
Y/N glared at him over her shoulder. “Butcher should have left you on ice.”
Ben grinned. “I’m still a little chilly,” he teased. “Why don’t you come warm me up?”
“In your dreams, Grandpa.”
He patted his thigh. “Come on, Sweet Cheeks, hop on up here and show me those perky tits.”
Arousal and anger swirled in her gut and Y/N grit her teeth. “Things don’t work like that anymore. You can’t just snap your fingers and have women swoon over you. This isn’t the ‘40s.” Her glare cut through him as sure as Homelander’s laser eyes could and his nostrils flared in annoyance. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to put my clothes on before you say anything else.”
She turned to head back to the bathroom, but he moved like lightning, blocking her path. She gasped when his big hand locked around her arm.
“What are you doing?” She twisted her hand to break free and the bundle of clothes fell to the floor. “Let me go.” Her voice was shaking but as firm as she could make it.
He laughed and tightened his fingers around her wrist. “Your pulse is racing.”
She looked up and sneered. “That’s because you’re annoying the crap out of me.”
“Or maybe, it’s because you want me to do this-”
Soldier Boy tugged her arm and she crashed against his firm chest. She inhaled quickly, sucking in the heat of him, the dark woody scent of his body, and the stink of the drugs. Her head clouded and he took advantage, pressing his lips to hers in a rough kiss. Unconsciously, she opened for him and his hot tongue snaked against hers. She couldn’t hide the way her heart pounded- he could hear it. She couldn’t conceal the flush of her skin- he could feel it. She couldn’t obscure the dampness between her legs- he could smell it.
When he let her go, Y/N stumbled back and shook her head to clear her vision.
Towering over her, Ben smirked proudly and licked her taste from his lips. “Told ya.”
Her palm cracked hard against his cheek and he cringed for her benefit.
“Fucking asshole!”
Staring up into his emerald eyes, she felt herself weaken but refused to give in. She hit him again.
“Don’t you fucking touch me!”
Another slap made a soft smile pluck the corner of his mouth and Y/N raged, giving into the rushing arousal that swarmed her thoughts and pushed away her common sense. She raised her hand again, but instead of a slap, she clawed at the nape of his neck and drew his lips down to hers, kissing him hard.
Ben sucked in a breath, shocked by her aggression. He hummed when she licked into his mouth; slipped his free hand down her sides when she bit his bottom lip. His fingertips dug into the meat of her hips and she pulled back, looking up into his freckled face.
The end of the joint smoldered between his fingers, crumbling to ash like a pillar of Pompei. Y/N wrapped her delicate hand around his wrist and brought his fingers up to her mouth.
Holding his gaze, she puckered her lips and sucked in a deep breath, pulling the drugs into her lungs. She shuddered and coughed, senses overtaken by the strength of the bud.
“Fuck…”
Ben bent down to take a final drag and the cherry died. He dropped the dregs and pulled her close, slowly exhaling the smoke through her parted lips.
She inhaled and her eyes rolled. Her balance skewed and she swayed against him.
“Now…” He cleared his throat and slid his hand against the back of her head, holding her there. “How about you get on your knees and show me what a good girl you are.”
Y/N laughed and shook her head. “I have a better idea.”
He cocked a brow. “Really?”
“Mhm…”
Taking a step back, Y/N released the knot in the towel and let it fall to her feet. Immediately, Ben reached for her, but Y/N caught his hand, shoving it away.
“I told you, things are different now.”
Reaching up, she dragged her fingertips down his cheek. He leaned into her touch, eyes fluttering slightly.
“It’s not just take, take, take anymore…”
Her hand moved slowly down his throat, tracing the thick muscle down to his shoulder.
“Sometimes, you gotta give.”
His forehead creased in confusion, and Y/N explained without words, pressing his shoulder down and urging him to his knees.
In awe of her suggestion and high as a kite, Ben slid to the floor and looked up with full-blown pupils and wet lips. As he watched, she ran her hands over her breasts, plucking each nipple until the flesh darkened. He swallowed hard. Her right hand dipped down between her thighs, carrying his gaze to her pussy. She spread her legs and rubbed gently, slicking her fingers with arousal.
He parted his lips, ready to shoot another one-liner her way, but Y/N silenced him quickly. She pushed her wet fingers into his mouth and rubbed her juices on his tongue.
His eyes closed and he moaned around her fingers. “Fuck…”
She spread her legs and grabbed a handful of his thick hair. “Time to give, Soldier Boy…”
Y/N forced his face into her cunt, but he needed little prodding. As soon as her flesh hit his face, he started to lick and her body arched back in mounting pleasure. She tugged at his hair as he sucked on her clit; bucked her hips against his mouth when he pressed two hot fingers into her.
He came up for air, sitting back on his heels and craning his neck looking up at her. His face glistened and his lips were swollen. He pressed his palm down over his cock and groaned.
“Wanna fuck you,” he breathed, roughly stroking himself through his sweats.
Y/N smiled devilishly and shook her head. “That’s so sweet,” she mocked, “but no.” Again, she grabbed his hair and yanked until he fell forward. “This is all you get.”
Ben sank into her pussy, driving her wild as lingering smoke faded around them.
He watched her through the car windows, staring as she walked down the street with Hughie by her side. They were arguing about something he couldn’t hear. Hughie’s lanky twig arms were waving in the wind as Y/N stood with her arms crossed and a hip popped in annoyance. Ben couldn’t give less of a shit what they were fighting about, he just wanted out of the damned car. He wanted to stretch his legs and wreak some havoc on that bleached blond, cape-wearing dickwad Homelander.
Instead, he crushed another pill in his strong hand and snorted it back, humming loudly as the jolt hit his brain. “Goddamn, that is good shit.”
Again, his eyes flew to Y/N and he licked his lips, remembering the sweet taste of her pussy and the noises she made while cumming on his tongue.
As if she could feel his eyes on her ass, Y/N suddenly turned and met his gaze. She shuddered a bit but didn’t look away, staring into his eyes from across the street.
Hughie waved a hand in front of her face, drawing her attention back.
“Hello! We’re not done here,” he snit; baby face screwed up in anger.
Y/N tilted her head and shrugged. “I don’t know what to tell you, Hughie. I’m not in charge of this shit. I’m just a babysitter.”
She looked at the car again and found Ben still admiring her form. He had his right arm on the window ledge and his forehead against the door. She couldn’t see his left hand, but she could imagine where it was as he pressed his tongue against his top teeth and dropped his eyes down her body.
Y/N sighed out a delicate moan.
Hughie gagged. “Are you serious?”
“What?”
He grabbed her arm, turning her back around. “Are you fucking him?”
Y/N startled and dropped her arms. “What? Who?”
Hughie’s face reddened. “Who? Soldier Boy!”
Shaking herself, Y/N cringed. “Ew. No! Why the fuck-”
“Well, you’re staring at him like he’s a fucking vibrator.”
Y/N laughed. “First off- that’s disgusting. Do not insult my vibrator like that. She’s one of my best friends.” She rolled her eyes. “Secondly, if I was gonna fuck anyone around here, it would not be that sexist junkie.” Hughie held his breath and stood up a little straighter. She laughed again. “Calm yourself,” she advised, turning away. “It wouldn’t be you either…”
Ben slowly rubbed his cock through his pants, eyes glued to her curves. He laughed when she threw her hands up, obviously annoyed with Hughie and his problems. The twig man cowered slightly and his face blushed hot red.
Soldier Boy laughed. “What a pussy.”
Three hours later, Y/N was half asleep in the front seat of the busted Lincoln, desperate to stay awake
Night had fallen as they waited in the woods, trapped in a car by her sharp-tongued, bearded leader Butcher. Y/N wanted to get into the fray and stab something, but she had been bound to Soldier Boy’s side, tasked with keeping him content and docile until needed.
She hated it.
He was humming to himself in the backseat, happily learning how to access porn on her smartphone. It had taken some time to get him to understand the mechanics of the swipe, but once he did, he was off like a racehorse, Googling the most depraved acts he could think of.
“Holy shit-”
Y/N rubbed her tired eyes and looked at him in the rearview mirror. His face was lit by the screen and his green eyes were wide; his plump lips stretched into an awed smile.
“What now? You find Hentaied yet?”
Ben looked up, confused, but immediately went back to his discovery. “No. What? No. There’s… well, there’s two girls… and one cup… and-”
“No! No. No.” Reaching into the backseat, Y/N grabbed the phone from his hands and quickly shut it down. “You’re not watching that crap on my phone.”
He laughed. “Crap.”
“Ew.” With a heavy sigh, she tossed the phone onto the passenger seat. “You’re gross.”
“It was on your phone.”
“Because you looked it up- I- It doesn’t matter. Just shut up. Please. My head hurts.”
Ben watched as she rubbed her temples gently. “Ya know… I have something that’ll cure your headache.”
Y/N glowered at him. “Don’t you dare take your dick out.”
“Not yet.” He chuckled and produced a prescription bottle, quickly popping the top. “This.”
She leaned over to look at the three white tablets as they tumbled into his palm. “What is it?”
He grinned. “My old friend Bennie.”
“Um… pass.”
“Oh, come on. You’ll feel better… it’ll… wake you up.” Ben winked and closed his fist, crushing the pills to powder. Unfurling his fingers, he offered the drugs again.
Y/N declined with a simple shake of her head.
He shrugged. “Suit yourself.” With a loud snort and a flip of his long hair, the pills were gone, launched up into his brain like a rocket ship. “Fuck!” He shook himself and laid back, pupils wide and skin tingling.
Y/N couldn’t look away. He looked normal for once. The grumpy, disgusting aura was gone, replaced with a relaxed yet wired look that was more appealing by the moment.
She huffed.
He tapped a single tablet into his open hand.
She held his gaze and nodded.
“Good girl.”
The drugs flew up her nose and instantly shook her brain. A bolt of lightning struck her head and every part of her came alive. Her pulse rose, her skin prickled, her pussy throbbed. She felt elated and wild. She wanted to rip her clothes off and run through the trees, feel the earth beneath her bare feet, howl at the half-moon.
“Nice, right?”
Ben smirked and her attention shifted from the fantasy of a naked nature waltz to a dream of him.
Y/N bit her lip and reached over the seat to grab the collar of his shirt. The cotton rumpled in her tight fist and Ben fell forward, pulled by her lustful tug.
She kissed him.
He hummed and shifted closer.
She pushed her tongue between his soft lips.
He grabbed her hair and yanked her head back, exposing her delicious neck.
“Fuck, you’re so hot,” he growled, pressing his lips to her pulse. “I wanna eat you alive.”
Y/N moaned and dipped her head to look into his eyes. The move pulled her hair harder and the pain spread like concupiscent fire through her system. “Maybe later,” she teased.
Her tongue shot out and lapped at his lips.
He sighed lustfully. “For now?”
Y/N bit down on his bottom lip and let it fall slowly from her teeth. His eyes rolled and she kissed his deeper.
“For now…” Her lips slid across his cheek and settled by his ear. “... I want you inside of me.”
Ben growled and grabbed her waist, easily lifting her over the seat and into his arms. She fell into him and went back to tasting his lips, moaning with every electric kiss, every twitch of his fingertips over her skin.
He snuck his hand beneath her shirt, pawed at her tits, and teased each nipple in turn.
She pushed down on his lap, shivering when she felt his erection poke through the layers of fabric between them.
“Please,” she moaned. “Please fuck me.”
Her hands fell down his big chest and Ben’s breath grew ragged and heavy. He kissed her one last time and then shoved her away. She gasped at his strength as she ended up on her back with her jeans tugged away. He moved with lightning speed, removing her panties and kicking away his clothes.
There was no hesitation when he was ready, no need to warm her up. Y/N was wet and tight, ready for him like she’d been edging herself for weeks.
The moment his cock pressed against her cunt, she was gone, clawing at his arms and letting out wild curses of pleasure.
He fucked her hard, pushing in deeper with every thrust. He watched her eyes roll and her muscles clench. He heard her heart struggle and the blood flow to her pussy. He knew her then inside and out and used every bit of his power to bring an orgasm crashing down upon her.
“Fuck!” She dug her nails into his shoulders while the pleasure wrecked her body. “My god!”
A cocky smirk played on his lips and Ben grabbed her hips. He lifted her like a doll as he settled back against the seat. Her legs spread around his trim hips and she instinctually sank on his cock, impaling her still throbbing pussy.
“Fuck, fuck!” She bit her lip and locked her tiny hands around his thick neck, holding on as she began to ride him.
The threat of her fingers on his pulse was enticing and Ben bucked his hips hard, fucking up into her as she struggled to stay upright. When she crumbled, he held her up, his big hand closing around the nape of her neck and keeping her spine straight. She was truly a ragdoll in his hands: a wet, hot, sexy toy for him to use.
Y/N shuddered with another orgasm and Ben let go as she tightened around his cock. With a rumbling growl, he came, shooting up into her with a powerful spray that she could almost feel going deep into her core.
Butcher had one foot out the door. He would have had both out and halfway down the motel hallway if not for Y/N’s hand fixed around his elbow.
Her fingers dug into the soft leather of his sleeve and he paused, looking down at her.
A strange mixture of anger and pathetic innocence filled her eyes and Butcher laughed.
“You’ll be fine, kid. He ain’t gonna bother you none.”
Y/N groaned. “Please. Just give me something else to do. I can’t stand it anymore. He’s such an asshole. He spent forty minutes this morning talking about Susan Summers and how good the ThighMaster was at tightening her pus-”
Butcher held up a hand, silencing her.
“I gotcha, but ya need ta realize I got a lotta balls in the air right now and I need that ball under lock and key.” He pointed behind her to the bathroom. The edges of the closed door were glowing as smoke and steam escaped, leaking an odorous marijuana and Old Spice vapor into the room. “And you, darlin’,” he continued, poking Y/N in the chest, “are the lock.”
She shook her head. “And where’s the fucking key so I can get out of here?”
Grinning, Butcher shoved her back a pace. He grabbed the door and stepped into the hall, pulling it behind him. “That’d be me.”
Her fist hit the door and her knuckles bruised instantly.
“God- fucking- damn it!”
One door closed and the other opened.
A naked Soldier Boy emerged from a dense fog of spiked steam like Jesus descending back to earth on a cloud.
Y/N caught herself staring at his dick and shook herself, turning quickly away.
“You can look,” Ben said, planting his bowed legs wide apart and setting his fists on his hips. “I don’t mind.”
She gagged dramatically. “No thanks.”
“Come on,” he urged proudly. “Take it all in. Bask in the glory!”
“You really are a tremendous piece of trash, aren’t you?”
With a shrug, he broke pose and went in search of pants.
“You didn’t seem to mind it last night,” he mused, bending over a bag of random clothing articles.
Y/N tried not to stare but his tanned skin was glistening with wetness from the shower and the muscles of his back were tight and twitching as he searched. Her eyes fell down his spine, lingered on his ass a moment, and then sank into the thick muscles of his legs. His thighs looked like tree trunks, his calves like branches she could entangle herself in and dangle forever.
“Yeah, well… I’m an idiot sometimes.”
Ben fished a pair of soft white boxers from the bag and turned, eyeing her as he toyed with the elastic hem, finding the front.
“Sometimes?”
She cleared her throat and narrowed her gaze, pushing every bit of annoyance into her stare. “Fuck off.”
Ben smirked and tugged on the shorts. “You know, you’d get a lot more attention if you were nicer. Smile more. Be respectful. Put some damned makeup on.”
Anger sizzled in her gut. “You didn’t seem to mind last night,” she echoed.
Pressing his tongue between his lips, Ben nodded. “Touché.”
Time passed slowly.
Y/N sat at the head of the bed, leaning on the headboard with a bottle of Jim Beam slowly emptying into her.
She stared at Ben despite herself, always looking away, arguing with herself, and then looking back, getting stuck on something about him. His hair was so perfectly long in all the right places, and somehow gorgeously always in place. His beard was thick but soft like he’d been grooming himself for the last forty years. His eyes cut right through her resolve anytime he looked at her. At times she wondered if he had x-ray vision or could see into her soul.
Still shirtless and refusing to get dressed, Ben paced the room. His bare feet dug into the thin carpet as he walked back and forth, seething with energy.
“Sit down already!” Y/N yelled. “You’re making me dizzy! You’re like a fucking pendulum going back and forth.”
Pausing by the door, he grit his teeth and glared. “Give me something to do, then.”
Y/N shrugged. “If we had anything to do, do you really think I’d be sitting here? With you?”
Giving up his worn route, Ben took a seat at the little round table in across from the bed and grabbed a wrapping paper.
“Why do you hate me so much? What’d I ever do to you? Kill your grandmother?”
“What? No.” Y/N scoffed. “I hate you because…”
Her thoughts trailed off when her eyes fell on his broad shoulders. They moved languidly as he rolled a giant spliff, muscles rippling under her gaze as if her world had switched to slow motion.
“Uh…”
He brought the joint up to his lips and Y/N gasped slightly when his tongue jutted out to wet the seam.
“You…”
Green eyes locked onto hers and Y/N felt her pussy throb.
“I, um…”
Ben chuckled to himself and twisted the ends of the paper tighter. He sat back in the chair and clicked the lighter Butcher had left him.
“You know what your real problem is?” he asked, letting the flame grow high before setting it to the end of his cigarette.
Her heart was pounding, her skin on fire for wanting him. “What’s that?”
“You only want me when you’re high.”
It was so absurdly true that she laughed out loud. Y/N shook her head and tipped the whiskey back, taking a deep drink. “You’re incredible, you know that? It’s like everyone has to love you but when they don’t, you make some shit up. Nuh-uh. You’re… shut up. I hate you.” She took another sip for good measure and huffed in his direction. “You suck.”
Ben licked his lip and took a drag. The exhaled smoke haloed his gorgeous face and Y/N hated every drop of booze in her system. They were all dragging her mind to nasty places that she’d rather not go.
“It is true,” he argued, blowing a smoke ring high about his head. “And I think you like it.”
She stiffened. “I do not.”
“I think you do.” Ben sat forward and pulled in another hit. The drugs flooded his brain and he smiled happily. A few moments of bliss before trauma struck again. “I think you need it.”
“Need what?”
She watched with building lust as Ben stood up and walked to the foot of the bed. With the fag balanced on his thick bottom lip, he crawled onto the mattress and moved towards her.
“You need the release,” he explained, hand over hand moving closer. “You need to be high so you can forgive yourself for wanting me.”
Her heart skipped when he reached her feet. He was right and she hated it. He was terrible and she loved it. He was right there and she wanted him.
“And honestly, toots- if that’s what you need, that’s fine with me.” Sitting back on his heels, Ben offered her the joint. “Go on. Smoke the guilt away.”
As if moving in a dream, she took the pot from him and pressed the wet end to her lips. He held her gaze as she inhaled, set his hand upon her ankle while she closed her eyes, and slid it higher when the smoke billowed around them.
“There’s a girl…”
Whiskey and cannibus swarmed her senses and Y/N ran a finger down the middle of his chest. He was smooth and firm and covered in constellations of pale freckles. She leaned forward as he bent down and her lips caught his left nipple. He hissed when she sucked hard.
“Damn…”
Y/N looked up innocently while dragging her hand down lower. It brushed against the base of his cock and he sucked in a quick breath.
“Another,” he urged, pushing the joint back up to her mouth. Her lips parted and she breathed deeply. “So fucking hot…”
Eyes fluttering and thoughts swimming, Y/N gave in and reached into his shorts. She fit her fingers into a tight circle and stroked down the length of his cock, waking him up fully and making his chest expand with heavy breaths.
“Fuck…”
She grinned when he cursed; drooled as his head fell back with a pleasured moan. “More?”
Ben dipped his chin and chewed at his lip, nodding. “Oh yeah.”
Another hit did her in and Y/N shifted onto her knees. She pressed up against him and licked at his lips before shoving the joint between them. Ben breathed deeply and the cloud rose around them as she kissed her way down his body. She opened her mouth and lay it over his erection, breathing out, hot and heavy. He shuddered and his ass clenched.
“Fucking hell…”
Feeling somewhat outside of herself, Y/N looked up with hungry eyes and hooked her fingers into his waistband. “Oh, just wait,” she whispered, tugging his shorts down to his knees. “It’s my turn to give…”
She licked at the tip of his cock and sucked a wet kiss over the groove underside. Falling fully onto her hands and knees, Y/N teased him with her lips, running her mouth up and down his shaft until he was bouncing on her tongue, fully engorged and leaking.
“We need to keep you stoned off your ass twenty-four-seven,” he mused, halfway between a moan and a whimper.
Y/N pulled back and gently rubbed his sack. “Why don’t you get more comfy?”
Ben cocked a brow and grinned. “Yes, ma’am.”
He turned and fell onto the bed, taking up her old spot against the headboard. She fit perfectly between his knees and went right back to work, shoving her hot mouth down his cock. She gagged and he groaned. She slurped and he yanked at her hair. She swallowed and he pushed her face down as far as she could go.
“Now this- this is fucking fantastic.”
Ben took a deep drag and blew the smoke down into Y/N’s face. She inhaled and her eyes rolled back, deeply aroused and stupidly high.
She used her whole body to pleasure him. She scrapped her nails down his sensitive inner thighs, swirling her tongue over his sack, rubbed his cock between her tits. Her ass wiggled and her pussy dripped, throbbing and so close to cumming from simply sucking him off.
When she slowed, he bucked his hips. When she choked, he pushed her down further. When she shuddered with an unexpected orgasm, he egged her on with gravelly moans and curses that stunted her thoughts.
“Gonna drown you in cum, sweetheart,” he grunted, straining to hold still while she worked her magic.
Y/N hummed rapturously, daring him to do it, to murder her with his release.
Ben lay his hand flat on the back of her head and gently held her there. He was ready to explode and he wanted her to stay and swallow every single drop.
When the door opened, he was mildly surprised, but unwilling to stop. He jerked his hips up into her pliant mouth and Y/N squirmed between his legs.
“Holy fuck! Come on!” Hughie quickly shielded his eyes, but the damage was done. Y/N was sucking Soldier Boy’s dick like a porn star while the hero smirked like a moron.
“Hey! It’s Baby Hughie!” Ben tapped Y/N on the head, but she refused to stop. She was enjoying the slick slide of his cock over her tongue too much to give it up.
Hughie shook his head and turned away. “Y/N! What the fuck!”
Ben laughed before a tight groan worked its way through his chest. “Don’t get pissed at her,” he warned. “She’s a fucking expert cocksucker.”
Y/N swallowed hard and his thighs shook.
Hughie gagged visibly. “I’m gonna- this is- gross.”
Taking one last hit of the dying joint, Ben narrowed his gaze on the lanky man shadowing the doorway. “Oh, I’m sorry,” he said honestly. “Did you wanna get down on this?” He held out his hand, offering both the drugs and Y/N’s ass.
Shocked, Hughie shook his head. “What? No!” His cheeks burned bright pink and Ben laughed.
“Come on, ya pussy. I’m sure she won’t mind…”
Y/N voiced her opinion with a harsh scrape of teeth down his cock.
Ben hissed at the pain and shrugged at Hughie. “Sorry. It appears she does mind.”
Taking a deep breath, Y/N pushed her face into the soft patch of hair around his pelvis and Ben lost his mind. He gripped her hair tight and pulsed his hips in quick, short thrusts.
Hughie gawked at the scene and then struggled to leave. He spun in place and grabbed the doorknob, unable to turn it and escape with quaking hands and blurry eyes.
Y/N could feel Ben’s need throbbing on her tongue and she pulled back for a second to scold her friend.
“Get out already!” she shouted, shooing Hughie off with a wave of her spit-soaked hand.
Ben called her back, grabbing her cheeks in one big hand and pinching her lips into a tight circle. “Oh, he’s leaving,” he told her, guiding her mouth back to his throbbing cock. “Or he’s gonna see some things he can’t forget.”
Hughie slammed the door behind him and braced himself against the wall. His head fell back with a thud and he struggled to wipe the memory clear. He didn’t care that Y/N had lied about fucking Soldier Boy, but seeing her blitzed and working his cock was more than Hughie could take. An old “Say No To Drugs” poster from grade school flashed through his thoughts and he cringed.
When Ben’s orgasmic roar flooded out into the hallway, Hughie booked it, strangely looking forward to spending the night alone in the car.
Summary: On her gym anniversary, she shares a cute moment with her favourite trainer and friend. Suspecting he has feeling for her she’s can’t help but coil back in fear.
WC: 1.6k+
Contents: trainer Cody x female, written in first person, no use of y/n, only pet name, gym, no negative body image, vomiting, pining, intense emotions, friends, his pov, no smut (but this is a no minor zone)
Message: Posting a Flash as I work through my new the first part of my veterinarian series for Cody. I’m slowly getting back into writing so it might be awhile
I adjusted the gym bag over my shoulder a little higher. I feel like I bathed in extacy for an hour, the high is hitting me at full force. I walk into the public gym with confidence dripping off me. Today marks an entire 365 days since I’ve flipped, I’m fucking proud of my self for pulling that shit off.
“Someone’s glowing!” Cody, one of the trainers that resides with this location says, his lips are pink as a congratulatory smile spreads on his lips.
“What can I say, it feels good to be a gym rat!” I say with playful pride. Reaching the front desk where he hides behind.
“Oh please you’re not Gym Rat material yet!” He chases back and a rush of electricity runs up my spine when his voice knocks down an octave or two.
“Christian, you’ve taught me all I know. If I’m not a Gym Rat by now? That definitely speaks volumes to your commitment to this gym.” I tease with a shit- eating- grin.
“I’m just teasing baby, you became a Gym Rat the moment you met me huh?” He says it so casually that I couldn’t process the words he spews. Me and Cody seemed to have this best friends who pine after the other variant of romantic relation, we ping pong harmless flirting every chance we get,but this gorgeous man in front of me, has never called me Baby.
I didn’t want to look too much into it, over the last year Cody always managed to involve me in his woman drama. Solely on the fact that I happen to be his friend and a woman. Yay me, suffering in pain. Love that for me.
Although I haven’t heard anything lately and it has the cogs turning, I truly wanted the man but I was unsure if he wanted me.
“I take pre-work out and jam protein powder before 12am. I portion control and train 4 times a week. If anything? I’m a Training Mouse.” I laugh trying to shoe away the feeling he gave by calling me, Baby.
“But it works for you and your lifestyle, you’ve made so much progress this year, I officially promote you to Gym Rat.” Cody stands straight and extends his back, his chest grows against the fabric of his shirt. So tight against his skin I can see the threads stretch beyond repair.
He seems to pull an imaginary crown from his back pocket, he fakes amazement as he looks at the jewelry in his palm. Trying to reach the crown towards me, his hips are caught by the desk and I laugh at his childish behaviour as he rounds the reception desk.
I could only laugh at this gorgeous man making me fall out of the sky, burning for him. “No laughing, this is a serious ritual.” He tries to say it sternly but fails miserably when a grin slips as our eyes meet.
He’s close and I can practically taste his cologne in my throat, I didn’t care, Cody could break my bubble any day he pleases.
“I, Cody Christian, trainer at this establishment, now present you, Baby, as an official Gym Rat on the celebration of your one year anniversary of feeding this place your money.” He softly gestured for me to bow my head. And I obey rolling my eyes playfully at this scene he created for me.
His warm muscular body hovers over mine and I’m engulfed in a glowing heat, his calloused hands brush the center of my scalp, placing the crown on my head. I smile graciously and wave like the queen, He makes me feel like in this little made up world of his.
“You know, Gym Mouse. Has a softer touch and fits better. Don’t ya think, Christian?.” He squints his eyes at me and I my cheeks cramp, Cody’s aura makes me feel alive again.
“You just don’t know how to appreciate anything I give you.” He winks at me before fake pouting all the way back around the desk.
“Thank you, Cody. Your support in my health journey has motivated me to thrive as much as I have.” A soft blush rounds his ears and I break eye contact in fear. I liked thinking the little hints of attraction from him is my delusional mind running on bright colours. It's pathetic to even admit this as an adult, but god was it easier to think of him as my best friend who I just happen to be attracted to.
“Don’t mention it, really. It’s my job.” The atmosphere clicked off and it felt like this entire interaction was mere dreaming.
His job.
He demoted me.
“Yeah. Of course…” I drag on and his eyes are a dull blue as he watches me under his steel gaze. Fetching my keys I hold the baby pink fob up to the scanner finally. The small glass gate pops open towards me and I give Cody one last glance before heading in.
It’s confusing to see longing swirling inside.
“Enjoy your session.” Garrett, the actual receptionist stationed at the front pipes up. A million watt smile desperately plastered, giving an aura of overkill niceties.
“I will.” I say flatly into the blue eyes of the white wolf.
Her expressionless eyes send an arrowhead into my heart, leaving a hole in its wake. I trail her figure until she heads for the women’s only section tucked in the back of the building.
“You’re fucked.” Garrett spit into my ear, watching her hips sway out of view.
“Did you not see the fucking fear in her eyes when she was thanking me?” I seeth out, not fond of hom taunting me with her again.
“Oh I’m pretty sure the rover from mars saw it. She’s afraid of how you make her feel, I’ve never physically seen a woman pine for a man before, but the way she looks at you? It’s genuine.” Garrett crosses his arms over his chest and pops one of those disgusting protein chips in his mouth.
I sighed loudly, throwing my head back in frustration , “she’s not ready.” I speak to myself.
“No one is ever ready for anything even if you had a bulletproof vest strap to your chest you still wouldn't be ready for it.Not that you need it or anything.” He chuckles to himself lightly, taking in the gains I’ve build form the ground up.
“You’re kinda wise when you’re not being a complete asshole.” I scoff at him trying to contain any composure I had left. A little disappointed I didn’t think of it before, how could I? when my heart hammered inside my chest at the sound of her voice.
The image of her on the first day is imprinted in my brain. She's an anxious mess, but she stayed with me the entire time during the tour and equipment tutorials, she was quiet as she trailed me and I couldn't help but feel a little protective over her. It gave me a sense of purpose and she couldn't pry it out of my grasp if she tried, but knowing me I’d let it slip and let her have it.
At the end of it all I asked what brought her in and her eyes lit up and I wanted to save it at all costs.
“I’m just looking to improve my health and tone up my muscles a little. Nothing too majorly restricting.” The small glint in her eyes gave away the fact she did her research and knew exactly what she wanted to do. Fuck I admired that shit.
Pulling into my apartment parking lot I notice a familiar vehicle parked on the side. The engine and lights are off, the driver is long gone and I finger the roof of mine so aggressively, I feel like I pulled a wrist vein, or something of that sort.
Cody is here and he’s waiting for me, we’ve hung out outside of the gym, but only at public places. It wasn’t anywhere private like mine or his, was there a purpose for that? Cody always invited me out and I’ve done the same. The realization digs into me and I have the urge to throw up.
We were hiding in plane fucking sight.
It builds up, and I struggle to open the door of my own car. The seat belt is restraining me inside, I manage to click myself out before heaving the contents over the cement.
“Fuck, that’s disgusting.” I mumble, staring at the contents on the front tire of my car. Cringing, I manage to bring myself to my knees.
Feeling a pull I glance in that direction and Cody stands there and embarrassment engulfs me and I have the frantic urge to get in my vehicle and disappear until I have no idea who I am.
He’s silent as he stares at me slowly making his way for me and I’m too weak to flee from him.
I’ve never seen him so vulnerable before, Cody had a bright and positive aura about him and maybe that’s what cured my mentality.
He’s quiet as he rests himself next to me against the hood of my car, never glancing at the vomit on the ground. No cringe and not a hint of disgust at the slime on my shoes.
His palm is warm crawling across my thigh and captures fingertips with such tenderness. He brings my hand into his lap and covers my hand entirely with both hands, holding mine hostage. It lit a flame inside, warming my soul for the rest of the universe.
“You know I…” Cody starts and trails off slowly, my heart tingles at I’m eager to here what he has to say, because this entire day let up to now, here, with him.
“You’re an amazing fucking Human being.” He clenches my fingers tighter and I can hear the aggressive rhythm of his heart faintly in his chest.
He’s for real.
“You’re not so bad yourself.” I say with a teasing smirk, gleaming on my lips. Cody rolls his eyes into the back of his head dramatically and I shake my head playful in return.
Summary: On her gym anniversary, she shares a cute moment with her favourite trainer and friend. Suspecting he has feeling for her she’s can’t help but coil back in fear.
WC: 1.6k+
Contents: trainer Cody x female, written in first person, no use of y/n, only pet name, gym, no negative body image, vomiting, pining, intense emotions, friends, his pov, no smut (but this is a no minor zone)
Message: Posting a Flash as I work through my new the first part of my veterinarian series for Cody. I’m slowly getting back into writing so it might be awhile
I adjusted the gym bag over my shoulder a little higher. I feel like I bathed in extacy for an hour, the high is hitting me at full force. I walk into the public gym with confidence dripping off me. Today marks an entire 365 days since I’ve flipped, I’m fucking proud of my self for pulling that shit off.
“Someone’s glowing!” Cody, one of the trainers that resides with this location says, his lips are pink as a congratulatory smile spreads on his lips.
“What can I say, it feels good to be a gym rat!” I say with playful pride. Reaching the front desk where he hides behind.
“Oh please you’re not Gym Rat material yet!” He chases back and a rush of electricity runs up my spine when his voice knocks down an octave or two.
“Christian, you’ve taught me all I know. If I’m not a Gym Rat by now? That definitely speaks volumes to your commitment to this gym.” I tease with a shit- eating- grin.
“I’m just teasing baby, you became a Gym Rat the moment you met me huh?” He says it so casually that I couldn’t process the words he spews. Me and Cody seemed to have this best friends who pine after the other variant of romantic relation, we ping pong harmless flirting every chance we get,but this gorgeous man in front of me, has never called me Baby.
I didn’t want to look too much into it, over the last year Cody always managed to involve me in his woman drama. Solely on the fact that I happen to be his friend and a woman. Yay me, suffering in pain. Love that for me.
Although I haven’t heard anything lately and it has the cogs turning, I truly wanted the man but I was unsure if he wanted me.
“I take pre-work out and jam protein powder before 12am. I portion control and train 4 times a week. If anything? I’m a Training Mouse.” I laugh trying to shoe away the feeling he gave by calling me, Baby.
“But it works for you and your lifestyle, you’ve made so much progress this year, I officially promote you to Gym Rat.” Cody stands straight and extends his back, his chest grows against the fabric of his shirt. So tight against his skin I can see the threads stretch beyond repair.
He seems to pull an imaginary crown from his back pocket, he fakes amazement as he looks at the jewelry in his palm. Trying to reach the crown towards me, his hips are caught by the desk and I laugh at his childish behaviour as he rounds the reception desk.
I could only laugh at this gorgeous man making me fall out of the sky, burning for him. “No laughing, this is a serious ritual.” He tries to say it sternly but fails miserably when a grin slips as our eyes meet.
He’s close and I can practically taste his cologne in my throat, I didn’t care, Cody could break my bubble any day he pleases.
“I, Cody Christian, trainer at this establishment, now present you, Baby, as an official Gym Rat on the celebration of your one year anniversary of feeding this place your money.” He softly gestured for me to bow my head. And I obey rolling my eyes playfully at this scene he created for me.
His warm muscular body hovers over mine and I’m engulfed in a glowing heat, his calloused hands brush the center of my scalp, placing the crown on my head. I smile graciously and wave like the queen, He makes me feel like in this little made up world of his.
“You know, Gym Mouse. Has a softer touch and fits better. Don’t ya think, Christian?.” He squints his eyes at me and I my cheeks cramp, Cody’s aura makes me feel alive again.
“You just don’t know how to appreciate anything I give you.” He winks at me before fake pouting all the way back around the desk.
“Thank you, Cody. Your support in my health journey has motivated me to thrive as much as I have.” A soft blush rounds his ears and I break eye contact in fear. I liked thinking the little hints of attraction from him is my delusional mind running on bright colours. It's pathetic to even admit this as an adult, but god was it easier to think of him as my best friend who I just happen to be attracted to.
“Don’t mention it, really. It’s my job.” The atmosphere clicked off and it felt like this entire interaction was mere dreaming.
His job.
He demoted me.
“Yeah. Of course…” I drag on and his eyes are a dull blue as he watches me under his steel gaze. Fetching my keys I hold the baby pink fob up to the scanner finally. The small glass gate pops open towards me and I give Cody one last glance before heading in.
It’s confusing to see longing swirling inside.
“Enjoy your session.” Garrett, the actual receptionist stationed at the front pipes up. A million watt smile desperately plastered, giving an aura of overkill niceties.
“I will.” I say flatly into the blue eyes of the white wolf.
Her expressionless eyes send an arrowhead into my heart, leaving a hole in its wake. I trail her figure until she heads for the women’s only section tucked in the back of the building.
“You’re fucked.” Garrett spit into my ear, watching her hips sway out of view.
“Did you not see the fucking fear in her eyes when she was thanking me?” I seeth out, not fond of hom taunting me with her again.
“Oh I’m pretty sure the rover from mars saw it. She’s afraid of how you make her feel, I’ve never physically seen a woman pine for a man before, but the way she looks at you? It’s genuine.” Garrett crosses his arms over his chest and pops one of those disgusting protein chips in his mouth.
I sighed loudly, throwing my head back in frustration , “she’s not ready.” I speak to myself.
“No one is ever ready for anything even if you had a bulletproof vest strap to your chest you still wouldn't be ready for it.Not that you need it or anything.” He chuckles to himself lightly, taking in the gains I’ve build form the ground up.
“You’re kinda wise when you’re not being a complete asshole.” I scoff at him trying to contain any composure I had left. A little disappointed I didn’t think of it before, how could I? when my heart hammered inside my chest at the sound of her voice.
The image of her on the first day is imprinted in my brain. She's an anxious mess, but she stayed with me the entire time during the tour and equipment tutorials, she was quiet as she trailed me and I couldn't help but feel a little protective over her. It gave me a sense of purpose and she couldn't pry it out of my grasp if she tried, but knowing me I’d let it slip and let her have it.
At the end of it all I asked what brought her in and her eyes lit up and I wanted to save it at all costs.
“I’m just looking to improve my health and tone up my muscles a little. Nothing too majorly restricting.” The small glint in her eyes gave away the fact she did her research and knew exactly what she wanted to do. Fuck I admired that shit.
Pulling into my apartment parking lot I notice a familiar vehicle parked on the side. The engine and lights are off, the driver is long gone and I finger the roof of mine so aggressively, I feel like I pulled a wrist vein, or something of that sort.
Cody is here and he’s waiting for me, we’ve hung out outside of the gym, but only at public places. It wasn’t anywhere private like mine or his, was there a purpose for that? Cody always invited me out and I’ve done the same. The realization digs into me and I have the urge to throw up.
We were hiding in plane fucking sight.
It builds up, and I struggle to open the door of my own car. The seat belt is restraining me inside, I manage to click myself out before heaving the contents over the cement.
“Fuck, that’s disgusting.” I mumble, staring at the contents on the front tire of my car. Cringing, I manage to bring myself to my knees.
Feeling a pull I glance in that direction and Cody stands there and embarrassment engulfs me and I have the frantic urge to get in my vehicle and disappear until I have no idea who I am.
He’s silent as he stares at me slowly making his way for me and I’m too weak to flee from him.
I’ve never seen him so vulnerable before, Cody had a bright and positive aura about him and maybe that’s what cured my mentality.
He’s quiet as he rests himself next to me against the hood of my car, never glancing at the vomit on the ground. No cringe and not a hint of disgust at the slime on my shoes.
His palm is warm crawling across my thigh and captures fingertips with such tenderness. He brings my hand into his lap and covers my hand entirely with both hands, holding mine hostage. It lit a flame inside, warming my soul for the rest of the universe.
“You know I…” Cody starts and trails off slowly, my heart tingles at I’m eager to here what he has to say, because this entire day let up to now, here, with him.
“You’re an amazing fucking Human being.” He clenches my fingers tighter and I can hear the aggressive rhythm of his heart faintly in his chest.
He’s for real.
“You’re not so bad yourself.” I say with a teasing smirk, gleaming on my lips. Cody rolls his eyes into the back of his head dramatically and I shake my head playful in return.
Plot: Jade has a ✨feminine energy✨day with Sarah and Kiara.
Word count: 2.7k+
Content: brother’s best friend, slow burn, underage drinking, foul language.
Disclaimer: the 3rd and final part of healing takes time, it’s not finished but I a year and a half ago and won’t be completing. I really enjoyed writing this but it’s not something I want to continue. I didn’t edited or anything kinda just want this out of my drafts.
{Part One} {Part Two}
———-
Someone laying on the horn in the dirt drive way of the Chateau knocked the relaxation out of my bones. The water lapped at my legs hanging over the dock, my shoulder blades were resting on the rotting wood. I was soaking up the sun cascading over my body and trying to enjoy my workless weekend.
Two car doors slammed shut in the distant and I instantly knew that it wasn't the Twinkie, it had sounds that I associated with home. Soft feminine voices were mumbling and a small smile creeped onto my face.
Sitting up I gathered my worn sneakers, hooking them with one finger each on the same hand. The HMS Pogue danced with the small waves caused by other boats that have passed. Walking up the long L shaped dock water dripped down my calves and imprinted my path onto the wood for thirty minutes.
feet partially dry I managed to shout a mangled greeting as I struggled to slip on my socks. Fumbling with forcing my shoes on, a little too excited to spent the day with them. I hopped off the dock landing wrong. I grained my balance back right before I could knock my teeth out from a brutal wipe out.
"Woah take it easy, Routledge!" Sarah chuckles walking towards me with Kie at her side.
"I don't know what came over me, My body just took over." I say a little sheepish.
It was an overpowering feeling of having female friends, almost like I didn't know what to do with myself. God was it absolutely embarrassing. I always had my brother and he was, most of the time, a good fill in to indulge into girl talk. Although their were some conversations I needed to only share with female friends.
Of course I had acquaintances at Kildare high. They were fun conversations in-between classes to fill in the time, or light gossiping at the boneyard, whenever Kiara pulled me along and she was caught with the boys. they weren't ones I hangout on my own time, it felt like a lot of effort to contain any relationship outside of home and work.
The least I could say was I am starved for female companionship. When Sarah asked us a week ago to go hangout I was ecstatic. The excitement started to stack before I realized and it tipped over causing me to just about snap my ankle in two.
"Honesty. I might be a little euphoric myself." Kiara says, and it stabilized my embarrassment,
"Over here too." Sarah pipes up.
"The aura all three of them bring feels so suffocating at times. I need this day you." She says with mock desperation and lightheartedness dancing in her tone.
"Tell me about it, I have a brother who reeks of that shit," I say with a mouth full of sass, they smile wide holding back fits of laughter.
"I don't mind it." Sarah says with a shrug.
"Absolutely disgusting." I mimic throwing up my bagel and coffee from earlier. "You say that because you haven't lived with the demon for a decade and a half."
"It'll get old fast." Kie says,
"damn right!" I agree enjoying this moment I was sharing with them. Surprised by how easy I fell into conversation with them. Like this was an everyday occurrence, I never wanted this feeling to escape from my fingertips.
"Are you ready?" Sarah questions racking over my attire. I was wearing very worn in short, a blue top and one of John's loose button shirts. It's very beach casual it wasn't too fashion friendly but it wasn't the worst thing I could've worn today.
"Yeah, I'm just going to give John a heads up." I say beginning to approach the house and finding him having a massive cat nap on the porch couch.
Stepping on the porch I slammed the screen door shut, but the bang only managed to halt his loud snored for three seconds. I rolled my eyes knowing this wake up job would take a little work. His entire body stretched along the sofa, his height so tall, the toes of his shoes hung over the arm rest.
One tap against his torn sneaker, "John." My voice holding a vociferous tone in attempt to wake him. But only backfired forcing his snores to become more prominent and stir in his sleep.
what on god's deteriorating earth did this kid do last night to cause him to sleep way into the afternoon? I heard him clamber through the house at three am. very late but at least he made the effort to come home.
"John B!" I hollered right over him.
His body jerked awake and his face held alarm as he sprung to life almost knocking me on my ass in the process. John wiped at his face regaining consciousness. Soon his brown eyes fell into recognition at the sight of me crossing my arms over my chest and eyeing him down with and unamused expression.
"What the Hell is wrong with you, Jade." He said bitterly and aggressively combed his hair back.
"Good Morning to you too sleepy head." I cooed at him as if he were a small child who didn't get what they wanted.
"You're so goddamn annoying." He seethes through his teeth.
"Someone is a little cranky." I mock a pout.
"Why the fuck did you wake me?" He growled grumpily into his palms and I smirk cockily at my suffering brother.
I shrug, "Just wanted to let you know I'm leaving to hang with Kiara and Sarah." I said pointing my thumb over my shoulder. He leans over looking past me and at the two girls resting against the hood of Sarah's SUV. "Hey John B," They snicker in unison.
"Hey." He replied with a rough sleepy voice.
"You're actually hangout with them?" There was a hint of eager happiness wrapped in his tone. I brushed it off and began began battling with the smile that tried to crawl to the surface.
"Me and Kie are alright friends. Sarah just fits in perfectly. And if I'm being honest I need female friends. So I hope you don't mind me stealing yours." I say smugly knowing I'd still hangout with them even if he was fully against it.
"I don't mind one bit." Me says with an ear splitting grin.
"Also I did want to talk to you later." I say not feeling like it was the right time to be bringing it up. Was there ever a right time for it?
"Sure. Anything."
"It's nothing too tremendous." I muster up.
I hope it wasn't because I knew this treasure hunting obsession has gone a little over the edge. I need John to lift the weight off my shoulders a bit. Allow me to breathe and maybe set some money a side for a rainy day. Who Knew how he'd take it, I just have to show him just how desperate I was to have my brother back.
"Okay." he jokes as if I wasn't going to give him an ultimatum.
---
The Surf Shack is an adorable little boutique located in the middle of the island. it wasn't marked as Figure 8 and nor was it part of The Cut. It was centered ground and probably the reason why it's Kie's favourite shop in all of Kildare.
Brand new surf boards lined the back wall, bathing suits towards the left wall and summer clothing to the right. Various string and bulky beaded jewelry Koisks scattered the floor. The theme of the store held a beachy ambiance, it was very soothing and felt familiar.
"What's the colour pallet?" Sarah ask slinging her arm over my shoulder and leaning against me, I become flustered at the close proximity not expecting her to clung on to me like she did.
"Uh.." I stated not really understand the premise of the question.
"Jade it more of a teal or a purple type of person," Kie says after lightly analyzing me and I begin to feel self conscious around them.
Sarah looks at me as if waiting for me to disagree. In all honest I've never had to luxury to pick the colour of my clothing. I purchased whatever fit me and looked at least half decent. So I'm not particularly familiar with my colour pallet.
"I think Kie is right." I pretend like I knew exactly what she meant, but from the look swirling in Sarah's eyes, I knew I failed miserably. I felt absolutely pathetic and began to interrogate my decision to come here with them.
"Lets just take a look around and have a feel for it." Kie says covering up the feeling of awkwardness that started to wedge its self between us.
"Sounds like a good idea." I say relieved, taking myself out of Sarah's grasp and going towards peach-coloured pieces. It didn't take long to find out the price of a single bikini top was far out of my budget. The white tag in my hand from a lime green basic triangle top read $68.
Who in there right mind would pay that much for nipple covers? was this what is was like to not live from pay cheque to pay cheque? because please sign me the fuck up, pronto. God I wonder what it would be like to no look at the price and know I could afford a lousy bikini set.
Looking around I saw Kie and Sarah in different isles sorting through the various styles and colours. I must've been looking like a lost freaking puppy for too long because one of the employees, Henley, walks up to me with a polite smile. She's tall and has perfect blonde hair flowing down her back. Henley definitely was a freaking goddess in her past life, I could tell you that much.
"Is there anything I could help you with?" She says with a mega watt smile, and I gulp nervously hoping she didn't think I was going to tuck this top into my back pocket. I'm not going to lie, it was pretty tempting now that I think about it.
"No, I'm just looking. Thank you for the offer." I say bringing my customer service to life like I knew exactly what I was doing. Caging up the nerves in the process. I could feel the eyes of the Pogues dart to me and I wanted to melted into the floor at the questioning looks.
"Are you sure? Because it looks like you're struggling." She presses and god was it fucking embarrassing. Was it really that hard for her to leave me to my thoughts?
"Hey, Henley, could you help me find a size?" Kie calls,
"Yes of course." She replies instantly. "Will you excuse me?"
"Not a problem." I give her a tight smile. I felt every one of my muscles relax at her retreating back. I could literally kiss the girl for calling the demon off of my spine. Sometimes Kie was an expert at reading my body language and rescued me with a fucking life raft, a good percentage of the time.
I shoved the green top onto the rack again and navigated my way to the clearance section. It crumbled the little ego I had left but it was my own doing for not seeking it out in the first place. I just wanted to feel normal for once and experience something other than The Cut.
The section was more budget friendly but it was less size inclusive. being in this place was like bringing a skate board to the beach. Not the smartest idea but I could make the best of it.
I could feel Sarah come behind me and lay her chin onto my shoulder browsing my selection with me. I oddly enjoyed how touch affection she is, almost like a nice surprise after a tough day.
"I know you probably don't want to hear this, but I could get you one you'll actually like. You've been scouring the rack for five minutes, I can see nothing is catching your eye. It's not a big deal. Think of it as a an early birthday gift."
I can't muster up the words I want to say, because how exactly do I respond to that? Sarah is one of the kindest people I know and I cant possible take advantage of her for a new swimsuit I don't need.
"I appreciate it. Sarah I really do, But I cant ask that." I say in a hushed tone knowing Henley is always keeping an eye on me at all times as she works around the store.
"You're not asking. I'm offering. There's a difference between the two. I've seen how hard you've worked to keep the Chateau alive. You deserve to enjoy something new once in awhile. You're not being selfish, Okay?"
Her tone is soft as she speaks into my ear and I couldn't help the hot tears from sliding down my cheeks. Sarah saw me and still wanted to be here, I felt every emotion I could and they hit me like a semi truck.
Kie had a sixth sense and soon was glued to my hip. Sarah filled her in, as I bite down on my bottom lip forcing the blubbering cries that wanted to escape, at bay.
'Oh Honey." Kie coos fondly and wipes a few tears away but they're soon replaced by fresh ones. "Here." Sarah hands me the keys to her SUV. "Why don't you sit in the car and we'll pick something out of you?" Her voice is sugar and I didn't want to leave her side. But if I didn't leave soon I know it wouldn't take much to have everything in me spilled out.
With a weak nod I mange to take the keys into my grasp almost dropping them at the unexpected weight. I'm a mess and everyone in this place was seeing it first hand. There was no way I would live this down. Hell would freeze over before I ever thought of returning to this shop. That pushy employee, Henley, would recognize me as the one girl from The Cut who broke down in the middle of this god forsaken place.
It felt like the walk of shame as I approached the exit and onto the side walk. With one click on the car fob Sarah's vehicle beeped and flashed as it unlocked. If I didn't have the keys in my hand someone would accuse me of stealing it.
Once I clambered into the backseat I slumped against the leather bench and sobbed into it. everything I was feeling over the last few days had finally rushed out of me in an earthshattering wailing.
---
I wake up disoriented. I'm still wearing day clothes but the moon light from my window is glowing onto my skin. I'm confused and well rested, that was the best fucking sleep I've had in ages. Everything from earlier smashes into my brain like a stone wall, the reason of the best cat nap of my life.
Pent up emotion from John B trying to keep dad alive, The feeling of having friends, and the situation I've found myself in with JJ. It was a lot and I never found the time to really come to terms with it all. I'm glad that everything had left my body. I'm so light that I feel like i'm walking on white fluffy clouds.
A small bag from the Surf Shack had caught my eye, I reach over and snatch it from my nightstand. Pawing at the contents I pull out a gorgeous pastel bikini set, It's either Purple or blue. Hard to in point the colour in the dark room.
Getting off the bed I could hear something else sliding on the paper bag. I stare at it with furrowed eyebrows for a few seconds before I fetch out a necklace. it's a smooth chuck of sea glass with a calico scallop shell thread through thick string.
my heart glows at the gifts they have given me. I swore to myself I'd eventually pay them back. I'm not entirely sure how, but I would.
Flicking the light on I pull the bikini onto my body and it fits perfectly. In the small broken and smudge mirror in the corner of my room, I noted how pretty the colour looked on my skin. I wondered how they knew my correct size.
After wrapping the necklace around my neck I pulled my day clothes back on. With one last glance in the mirror I sauntered out of room in hopes to find the girls responsible for my glow.
“Wait—what do you mean?” Daryl asked, coming to a dead stop.
Your momentum carried you a few steps ahead before you realized he wasn’t beside you anymore. You stopped and looked back at him, letting out a low laugh. “What do you mean what do I mean?” you asked, incredulous at his disbelif.
He looked puzzled. “People think I’m a badass?”
You stared at him in amusement and perplexity. “You’re joking, right? Daryl… you’re kind of famous for it. You drove a tanker in here and set the reservoir on fire with a fucking RPG.”
He still looked stunned and confused. “Well,” he drawled, shrugging. “I was just—doin’ what needed to be done. Shit was all sideways, ya know?”
You smirked. “And that is why you’re a badass. It’s not like you do these things for the glory… you do them to take care of your family, this community.”
He scruffed a hand through his hair and ducked his head for a moment before he started walking again, falling into step beside you. “Well, what about you?”
“What about me?” you asked.
“Ya punched both Aiden and Spencer out in the same day,” he said, shooting you an amused look.
“That’s not being a badass. That’s just being a good judge of character,” you retorted, drawing a hearty laugh from him. You grinned. You loved the sound of his laugh.
“Well, there’s plenty more I could list off,” Daryl said.
“Please don’t. I don’t need reminding of my temper.”
“Pfft. Me neither,” he teased you.
You shoved him playfully but couldn’t help laughing again and Daryl joined you.
Series Summary: You move to a small town in the middle of Texas to escape your past and start over. You don't expect to fall for the town's handsome sheriff.
Series Warnings: no outbreak AU, language, angst, slow burn, smut (18+ MDNI), domestic violence (mostly just talked about or implied, nothing too descriptive, i will put a big warning on those chapters), implied SA (nothing descriptive), jealousy/possessiveness, alcohol use, drug use (not by Joel or reader), technical infidelity - more warnings will be stated for each chapter but these are the biggies
I’ve never been so obsessed with a person’s writing before, ugh I just crave the way she writes Joel. The tension build up is top tier and this man needs her like his freaking soul depends on it!! Because of Roommates Ive been inspired write a Cody Christian with and recreate the feeling that @punkshort had given me. A goddess if I’ve met one. 💖🥺😭💖
The slow burn! Ugh I’m going to end up drowning in this master list.
StoryLine: Cody and you have been dating for awhile, and you know he’s keeping a hefty secret from you. The whole weekend turns into a fall date at the end all is revealed after Cody knows there’s a threat after you.
Warnings: If you aren’t above the age of 14 then you probably shouldn’t be reading my content. Werewolves and vampires.
word count: 4.9k
———
Randall pulled on his leash as the wind started to pick up, blowing the colourful leaves in every which direction. I tightened my jacket around me as I felt a little uneasy, as if someone was watching me. The pitter patter of my Siberian Husky’s paws had calmed me a little bit, but the feeling still lingered.
My phone dinged, echoing through the street. Fishing it out of my pocket, I instantly smiled seeing Cody’s name.
“Can’t wait to see you later X”
I smiled knowing he was busy with ‘work’, well that’s what he liked to call it anyways. He’d go hours even days without stopping by, Honestly I didn’t mind it too much. He needed space to do his own thing, I respected that. It also gave me time to focus on myself and Randall.
Cody has done it since we’ve met back in high school. Now I’m in my second year of college. Sure I’ve wondered if he was out with someone else, but he’s never gave me a reason to doubt his loyalty.
“Me Either, Sabrina?”
‘The Chilling Adventures Of Sabrina’ Was the perfect TV show to watch as Halloween was coming up soon. Puts you right in the mood for October.
‘Couldn’t of picked anything better myself.’
He replied fast, one of the reasons why I loved that man.
All the way home I had that same eerie feeling that someone was watching me. Like they never stopped watching, I might just be freaking myself out ‘cause of the weird and creepy Halloween vibe I keep getting.
As soon as I walked into my apartment I took Randall’s collar off and hung it up with his matching leash. I took off my jacket and flicked most of the lights on, I could feel a draft of wind coming from somewhere in the house.
I scurried around the apartment looking for the open window. Confused because I know for a fact that I locked every window before I left this morning for school. Randall followed me like a shadow as if it were his life’s mission, nothing knew.
The cold air was becoming stronger as I continued to approach the bathroom. Flicking on the light I was surprised to see the window above the shower to be unlocked and open. Goosebumps rose as my temperature levelled down.
Maybe I forgot to lock it last night after my shower, although I clearly remember that I did. I mean I usually do especially since it’s getting closer to the colder months now. Maybe Cody left it open when he saw me last night, That what I told myself as I closed the window to keep my mind at ease.
——
The smell of the Pillsbury Pumpkin cookies Baking in the oven spread through out the apartment. Randall laid in front of it, resting his head on his crossed paws. Sitting at my round marble table I was writing up an essay for one of my college classes, couldn’t remember which one it was for exactly.
Glancing at Randall again, bathing in the light of the oven. He most likely felt the warmth of those cookies, dreaming of eating them all. “You just think those Cookies are for you, don’t you?” I ask him teasingly.
He picked up his head, tilting his head to the side. One ear high and mighty like a wolf and the other flopping like the sweet little puppy dog he is. “Too bad you only get one and the rest are for me and Cody.”
At the mention of Cody he propped his head on the floor again. Randall never seemed to like Cody. Always a little stand offish towards him and not to mention he loves human attention, just not from him. It’s a little strange.
Finishing up my essay I saved it, I’ll proof read it on Sunday since it’s only Friday and it’s due Monday morning. Closing my lap top shut, the oven beeped just in time Before Cody got here, he had said he was on his way 5 minutes ago. A text and never a call, which I didn’t mind but it was weird, we’ve been dating for awhile now.
I pulled the cookies out after I turned the oven off. Randall was already on his feet as I put the cookie sheet atop the stove to let them cool. “Someone’s a little too excited for cookies since you get peanut butter ones every Saturday.” He wags his tail at my comment as his drool his the floor.
I roll my eyes at him before making my way to my room, he trailed behind me as if he was my personal body guard. Randall instantly jumped onto my bed, laying into a safe and protected ball.
Setting my phone up to my blue tooth speaker I started to dress into something comfy. Tempo by Lizzo started playing and I couldn’t resist it.
‘I’ve been waiting for this one’
‘turn it up’
I sang along with the song, it was one of those songs that put you in a good mood. It gave you the power of confidence, to feel good about yourself enough to make you happy.
It didn’t take me long before I began dancing and screaming the lyrics to Randall. He didn’t mind it this time because he didn’t get up and leave me like he has done before.This was the time to be myself and get wild, I don’t get to do it often but damn I should. It’s so much fun.
‘Slow songs, they for skinny hoes’
‘Can’t move all of this here with one of those’
‘I’m a thick bitch, I need tempo’
‘fuck it up to the tempo’
I wonder if my neighbours got bored of my dance sessions, I know I didn’t because I got lost in the way the beat moves me. They never complained about it, although they might call animal control. I defiantly sounded like a dying cat.
The song was ending and Randall kept his eyes on me. Probably snickering inside his head at how ridiculous I looked dancing the way I was. He was my number one supported I didn’t care.
“Mmm, that’s my future wife..” I heard my boyfriend’s sly voice say behind me. I jumped a little shocked by his arrival, I turned around and there he was leaning against the door frame. His arms crossed as he visibly checked me out. His green eyes sparkled as a pink smirk appeared on his lips. The ones that I missed kissing every chance I got.
“Shut up.” I said teasingly making my way towards Cody as my phone continued to play songs. He chuckle, “..Of course it is, she’s such a dork.” He finishes letting his hands rest on my hips, squeezing them firmly before he leans down and kisses me. I gave him a smirk, “Actually I think me and Randall need a night to ourselves, to watch Sabrina and devour those cookies in the kitchen.” I tease.
Randall barks at the mention of his name. Cody’s expression changed from Cocky to Playful shock as I stepped away from him and sat on the bed with the Husky. He stared at the man in front of us as if he was challenging him to come closer.
They shared a look, it was concerning. It was almost as if they were actually challenging each other. It could of been a trick of the eye but I swear Cody’s eyes flashed red. Randall lowered his head to the bed like he had lost.
I shook my head lightly blinking, I didn’t mention it trying to distract myself with scattered thoughts.
“Alright fine, I guess that pumpkin spice latte on the coffee table is fine.” Cody says retrieving down the hall-way as if nothing happened.
Could of been the reflection of a car driving down the street. That weird stare must of been Cody admiring Randall or thinking of a come back to say. I pushed the eerie thoughts down, ignoring them for now.
“From Starbucks?” I asked innocently still sitting on my bed as Randall trailed Cody and leaving me alone. Rude.
“You know it Baby-girl…”
Boy does this man ever have a hold of my heart.
“…But you’d rather watch Netflix with your dog…Oh cookies.”
And he lost it.
I began to scurry down the hallway, past the living room and stopping to see that it was already set up for our Netflix date. My heart melted, Sabrina was paused on the TV, Blankets thrown on the couch, fall candles lit making the room smell amazing. The LED lights around the room were a bright orange, set for the Halloween vibe my boyfriend created.
“Cody I…It’s perfect.” I spoke breathlessly.
“Come squeeze in with us.” He says gently, using his arm to motion me over. I smiled at him knowing he was talking about both of my favourite boys.Taking a seat in between them, Cody wrapped his arm around my waist pulling me into him. Randall being on the other side of me rested his head on my thigh and let out a breathy huff.
On the coffee table sat the Halloween cookies, a bowl of popcorn, as well as two Starbucks lattes. I playfully roll my eyes, Cody is such a tease.
“Cody?”
“Yes, babe”
“I love you.”
“I love you too.”
—
A few episodes into the second seasons we Finished The Lupercalia one. Popcorn bowl as well as the cookie tray were empty with the help of Randall. Who fell asleep an episode or so ago, I don’t think he was one for the demonic.
“We should get to bed soon.” Cody yawns,
“One more episode?” I asked softly, preparing for the rejection. Cody shook his head playfully at me before pushing me off him. “You’re crazy, these episodes are an hour long.” He chuckles before getting off the couch and stretching.
“Your point is?” I asked, looking up at him with puppy dog eyes. He comes closer squeezing between my legs, He’s quiet as he lowers his face to mine, giving me a soft and sweet kiss. “My point is my girlfriend is a psychopath.” He smirks at me, I roll my eyes at him, what a tease.
“Please?” I whine as I look up at him.
“Okay I’ll make you a deal.” He has that glint in his eyes like he always does when he’s up to something.
“Shoot.” I say lazily. I knew what he’s going to say, it happens every weekend.
“We go have a little session in the bedroom and then we watching one more episode. I mean you have to energy to watch another so I think you have the energy for something more.” Cody Winks at me with high hopes in his eyes.
“Actually sleeping sounds good.” I Grab the Xbox controller and turn the console off.
“Are you serious?” Cody asks a little anger slipping through his words, “Yes, plus you’ll just wake me up in the middle of the night for it anyways..” I shrug my shoulders as I blow out the candles and turned the tv off. “..So you ending up winning in the end.”
“Alright, works for me.” He says, I laugh at his little mood swing, “Dork” I mumble with a smile.
“What was that, Dork?” he teases holding my hand in his.
“I love you?”
“That’s what I thought”
—-
I sat in the passenger seat of Cody’s truck, it was a fairly new one with an issue here and there. She still ran good and the AC worked like a charm. He absolutely loves this truck maybe more then me, I mean she was a blue Chevrolet Silverado 1500.
Nothing fancy, but I defiantly loved the look of her. Although she doesn’t compare to my green Jeep Wrangler at home. He’s a stick shift and Cody’s happens to be an automatic, always says he likes to play is safe, I call bullshit.
“what are you in the mood for?” Cody asks giving me a quick glance. I stay quiet for a moment thinking deeply about it, damn what i’m I in the mood for?
“Tea or Latte?” He says nudging me playfully.
“Mmm.” I say still deciding.
“Oh there passes Starbucks, looks like it’s tea.” Cody says.
“I wanted tea anyways.” I say passively,
“You’re just mad because I didn’t give you time to pick.” I look at him and he has this big smirk on his face, I couldn’t be mad a him even if I tried. Cody was too cute.
‘Shut up.’ I manage to say.
—–
It’s not too long before I’m a happy girl with my Pumpkin Spice tea. My whole mood switched as we were on our way to the yearly pumpkin patch. And there sat Cody in the driver’s seat occasionally sipping his basic white boy order, a double double.
“I love how excited you get over tea, it’s so cute.”
“I know.” I say sipping my pumpkin heaven with a smirk.
“You’re something else.” Cody laughed and shakes his head playfully at me before turning the music up, ‘Somebody’ by Keith Urban came on and Me and Cody both started Belting out the lyrics to it.
“And I’m letting go of all my lonely yesterdays”
“I’ve forgiven myself for the mistakes I’ve made”
“Now there’s just one thing”
“The only thing I wanna do”
“I wanna love somebody”
“Love somebody like you”
—-
It was a half an hour drive, but it felt like 5 minutes with him. The continuous giggling and mini concerts kept me occupied, plus Cody didn’t sound half bad. “Here we are, baby girl.” Cody says catching my hand in his as he guides me to the farm hosting the event.
Surprisingly it was a rather big pumpkin patch. I grew up in a small city where there was only one pumpkin patch in a 100km radius, a good bunch of animals to feed, but the pumpkins were some what good to take home.
This one had plenty of animals to feed, a corn maze, Horse back riding, and Halloween approved pumpkins. There were at least 5 patches like this in a 100km radius, It was perfect.
The one down side was the is was $25.00 per person, but we were willing to make that sacrifice. It was October of course.
Even though I really wanted to take a horse down one of the trails I held myself back. Cody was scared of horses, terrified if you will. He had said and I quote “Horses are powerful animals and they could kill you if they wanted to”
Sure that might be true, but horses were these beautiful gentle animals. But I respected his opinion because I loved him, I didn’t think it was silly because it was ‘his’ perspective of them.
“Babe just hold the cup out enough for them to reach the feed.” I say pulling his hand towards the grey baby goat.
“He’s gunna bite me.” Cody says urgently dropping the cup in the pen and pulling his hand out of my grip. I laugh at his reaction, “You’re being ridiculous right now, it’s a baby goat.” I say shaking my head at him teasingly.
“Then you do it!” He steps away from the wooden fence and crosses his arms. Forearms flexing through his black sweater, Jesus Christ my boyfriend was hot. Just give me a few minutes to admire him, his eyes, his hair, his lips, not to mention his body structure…
Reaching for the cup the baby goat got on his legs and started towards me. I dumped the contents onto my palm and shoved the paper cup in my back pocket. Holding my hand out the goat ate the feed, it tickled a little with it’s mouth rubbing against my hand.
Finishing, the baby goat looked at me as if it was asking for more. Soon it let out a ‘Mehhe’ and walked on back to the spot it was previously in. Wiping my hands on the back of my pants I looked back at Cody, “See nothing to be scared of.” I smirk at him teasing a little bit.
“Says the animal lover, I’m going to the bathroom.” He says passively, I playfully roll my eyes at him. Cody was being dramatic, he got like that sometimes. I usually let him blow of the little steam he had and he’d be perfectly fine when I see him again.
I continued down the fence line seeing the rest of the farm animals. I ran out of my own feeding mix awhile ago or I’d be giving some here and there. Cody’s was left over because he was too scared to use his. He kept saying he was leaving it for the baby goats, but he was hesitant, a white lie to keep me content.
Reaching the rabbits I instantly fell in-love with the ocean of fluffy cuteness. Crouching down sticking my arm through the fence gap as I called for one. A black one with beautiful floppy ears began to hop towards.
Smiling as it’s nose twitched against my hand. Soon the energy changed around me as I felt a dark presence beside me on the left. It made me freeze with aching nerves as my heart started to pound in my ears.
“Cute aren’t they?” Their voice was sly and masculine sending goosebumps along my whole body. The eerie feeling I pushed down erupted to the surface, but I needed to stay calm. Show him I wasn’t frightened, I was beyond that.
Slowly I turned to him and got on my feet, stay calm I kept telling myself. I smiled up at him, “They are, I wouldn’t mind having one myself.” I say with fake confidence as I stuffed my hands in the back pockets of my jeans.
He props himself against the fence a few inches closer, I couldn’t step back or he’d notice. “Why don’t you get one?” He furrows his eyebrows in question as my brain spots out how sickly pale his skin appears on this cloudy day. His hair is a raven black and seems to be slicked back with gel. His eyes are a dark brown almost a black, maybe they were black. His body structure was tall and lean, still he intimated me.
“Ah…My boyfriend doesn’t really like small animals, or animals in general.” I shrugged trying to brush off the way I slipped up.
“Understandable, wolves are territorial.” He spoke-
“Babe?” The sound of Cody’s voice immediately soothed me. taking my eyes off the tall man I see my boyfriend approach us, I smiled as he engulfing me into a hug from behind, nuzzling his nose into my neck. How did he know I needed him?
“Who were you talking to?” He asks curious, looking back at the tall guy. My eyes widened in shock, he was no longer there. He was just right here, where did he go? “Just some kids.” I lie with a smile.
Cody looks into my eyes, his holding an intense expression as he asked “Are you sure?” He asked pressing, he knew I was lying, how? I nodded as his eyes noticeably darkened, “Okay.” He says anyways kissing the crown of my head, slipping his fingers in between mine.
“Stay close.” He whispers to me not wanting to bother anybody else with our troubles. I nodded as the energy around us became tense and thick at the information we were both lying to each other. I knew he was hiding something from me, I just didn’t know what.
The stiff feeling began to fade as we found comfort in each other’s presences. We both agreed on picking out our pumpkins first before the corn maze. Which happened to be the thing I was most excited for.
Cody kept close not letting me wonder off too far, his structure was slightly stiff and more broader if that was possible. His green eyes stayed a darker shade then his original, I’ve never seen him like this before and I knew something serious was going one.
eventually we picked out pumpkins, I may or may not have taken extra time scoping them out. What can I say, I wanted the perfect pumpkin. We teased each other about whose was better the whole way to his truck. Let’s be real, it was defiantly mine. I told Cody to put them in the backseat, because if I saw a pumpkin unattended I’d take it with no guilt. More pumpkins equalled to even more pumpkin seeds. It was fair game out here.
“Do you really want to go through the maze?” Cody asks, I turn to him raising my eyebrows, “Really?” I asked him as if it wasn’t obvious. “Okay.” He chuckles, “You don’t have to get dramatic.” He nudges me.
“I’m not dramatic.” I pout like a child,
“Yes you are, now hold my hand.” he says holding his hand out for me to take.
“Why?”
He rolls his eyes, quickly grabbing my hand and pulling me towards his chest hard. I smirked loving how he got dominant in public. Cody grabs my face firmly and kisses me for a few seconds. “Now will you hold my hand?” He asked.
“Yes.” I say with a giddy smile and laced our fingers together, “There now everyone here knows you’re mine.” He says gently.
“God you’re cheesy.” I laugh as he finally guides us to the legendary corn maze.
Going through it was suspiciously calm and relaxing. Well except for the kids who were running and laughing through out the maze. Giving it that eerie feeling of the traditional Halloween.
Cody and I were joking around, chasing each other, as well as holding hands. He was relaxed forgetting about our mishap earlier. His eyes were bright and he was smiling ear to ear before he wasn’t anymore. Like the flick of switch his protective persona was back.
He stared passed my head, his eyes a dark green again before they became a bright red. Gasping I felt light headed and froze to think, my heart pounding in my chest. Was I dreaming? Because there was no way this was fucking real.
Cody held me tightly against him as if shielding my vision away from what or who was behind me. Adrenaline raced making me confused on what feeling I was currently experiencing.
“An eye for an eye Cody.” The voice was silky, strong, familiar. It hit me like a bus, it belonged to the sickly pale guy from earlier when Cody disappeared to the bathroom. My mind scattered trying to think, what the fuck was happening right now?
Cody’s grip began to tighten on my waist, I knew two things in this very moment. One, this wasn’t a fucking dream and it was reality. Two, there was no doubt gunna be a bruise because his grip fucking hurt.
Building up the strength I needed I forced myself out of his grip turning towards the enemy. I trembled at the sight of him, his eyes a pitch black. Several veins under his eyes surfaced, Fangs pinching his bottom lip. He was a fucking Vampire? My mind went on overdrive and my body became weak.
“A strong human you got there.” The words made shivers run down my spine, Cody’s growl was authorised, or at least I think it was a growl. anything could be possible at this point. Wasn’t too long before my body got too weak for me to physical hold myself up. Falling to the ground I watched as Cody stepped in front of me. Protecting me from him.
“Alice slaughtered my parents she was fair game.”
“I don’t care what she did, she was the love of my life. Soulmate if I may.” The voices started to muffle and I couldn’t tell which belonged to who.
“You’re a vamp, ruthless of creatures. You wouldn’t know a soulmate even if she hit you in the face.” More muffled words came about, but I couldn’t register them as I began to slip under.
The last thing I remember seeing was Cody turning into a wolf, massive wolf. Fur white as snow when it freshly falls on a winter’s night. He was beautiful as he plunges for the vampire who had threatened my life.
—-
I woke up screaming, my heart pounding in my chest. Looking around me I noticed I was in a room, a bedroom of some soft. Breathing heavily I climbed to the edge of the bed tearing the silk duvet away from my body.
I focused on my breathing as I thought about what happened before I ended up here. My date with Cody at the pumpkin patch, the corn maze, the wolf and lastly that strange guy. I remember not seeing any visible veins or even seeing him breathe. There was only one answer he was a Vampire.
Cody was a werewolf, it was crazy, maybe insane to think, but there was no other reasonable explanation for any of it. I was surprisingly calm from all the information flowing in my mind. Could’ve been because I was in shock, what did that even feel like? I’m tired is all I can think.
Pushing myself off the bed I feel a nightie pool around me. I look down and see a black shirt engulfing my body, Grabbing the neckline I pull it towards my face. It’s Cody’s I can recognise his cologne anywhere.
This must be his room, it’s massive with a huge bed, windows from the ceiling to the floor, and two couches. Not too mention The wolf portrait on the wall just above the one couch. I sit on the one across from it.
It’s a hand painted portrait you can tell by the texture of the brush stokes. There stood a white wolf with mighty pride, chest puffed out and head held high. It’s eyes were a blood red just like the flash in Cody’s eyes a few days previous.
A single golden crown rounded it’s giant ear, Emerald stones were embedded all the way around the crown. It was too small for it to go around both of it’s ears. At the bottom of the portrait were gold cursive letter that read ‘Alpha Cody’
It was him, it was insane, it was real.
Looking out the window and into the sea of green trees that stretched for miles. It started to add up, The overprotective boyfriend, his body temperature always being high, his red eyes, the neediness, his crazy appetite, and not to mention he was gone all the time.
The door clicked open and I still stared out the window. I could hear his foot steps come closer and sit on the couch where the painting was placed. “Can we talk?” He sounded weak, I looked at him concerned about his health.
He looked rough, his brown hair a mess, bags under his eyes, his skin was pale, and his eyes were blood shot. “What happened to you?” I asked, feeling the vibe between us has shifted.
He sighs resting his hands on his legs, “You, I didn’t know if you were ever gunna wake up, it scared the hell out of me. Every day was torture when you didn’t way up.” His voice was so heartbroken.
“How long?”
“Huh?”
“How long was I asleep?” I asked him, he began to bounce his knee and looked out the window. He didn’t want to answer me I understood that but I wanted to know. No I needed to know.
“Cody” I said under my breathe desperate.
“3 weeks.” He chocked up,
“I’m sorry.” I whispered,
“For what?” He looked at me and all I could see was a broken Cody and it clenched my heart.
“Not waking up, for you.” I spoke trying to imaging the pain I put him through, I couldn’t.
He reached for my hand and I couldn’t believe how much I missed his touch. We stayed quite holding each others hands together, soon enough he pulled me into his lap, more bridal style then anything else. He held me tight as he stared into my eyes, I don’t ever recall being this intimate with him.
We we’re both in a vulnerable state, I didn’t want anything else then him at this moment. My heart ached to be closer to him. Hot tears made there way down my cheeks as I aggressively kissed him, he kissed back with the same amount of passion and love as I did.
It lasted a min or 2 before he pulled away and hugged me tight. I never wanted this to end, there was so much emotion I didn’t think I was capable of. I held him as much as I could, but he was stronger then I was. I ran my hands through his hair loving the feeling of it.
“Please don’t leave me!” He begged sobbing into my shoulder, his body shook as I held him tighter.
“Cody, I would never.” I said softly still running my fingers through his hair.
“I know I’m not what you expected.” He sobbed louder, it broke my heart to see him like this.
“You aren’t , you’re better, Because I love you with every piece of me.” I say swallowing the lump in my throat as I began to rock him. His breathing regulated and his body began to relax into mine.
“I love you too.” It was barely above a whisper but I knew he did. Cody lowly started to fall asleep in my arms, his full weight shifted to me and it made me tired. It only took me a few minutes to fall asleep with him.
Chapter Summary: You meet Joel for the first time through your roommate, Maria. Shocking everybody, including yourself, you spend the night together. It isn't until you go on your first date and spend the week getting to know each other that you learn the true nature of his job.
Chapter Warnings: alcohol use, language, smut (18+ MDNI), Joel is huge (duh), nipple play, edging if you squint?, fingering, oral f!receiving, Joel is a consent king, multiple orgasms, protected piv sex, lil bit of angst
WC: 12.4K
A/N: this idea hit me when I was reading @shellshocklove's I Wanna Be Your Lover. If you haven't had the pleasure, I recommend you reading it. It is a great story and very well written.
Series Masterlist
It was late and the bar was loud. Almost instantly, you regretted tagging along with your roommate, Maria, to visit a guy she had been casually seeing while he worked. He was one of the bartenders at said noisy bar and she lured you in with the promise of free drinks and to possibly meet his older brother, who apparently was very handsome and charming and just your type. You were currently in a bit of a dry spell and had no other excuse to stay home on a Saturday night, so you caved. You let Maria pick out an outfit for you while you flicked the TV on, stopping when you found Roman Holiday on AMC. She had rolled her eyes at you when she saw the familiar black and white screen and held up two dresses. You had picked the one that showed less skin, but you still felt like you might fall out of your dress any minute as you followed her up to the bar, drunken bodies bumping up against you as you fought for a few inches of space to order drinks.
"What do you want?" Maria shouted to you, even though you were less than a foot apart, it was still necessary in order to be heard.
"Whatever you're having!" you shouted back, and glanced around the bar while she waited to get Tommy's attention. You hadn't met him yet, but from what Maria told you, he was a huge flirt, but sweet, kind, romantic and so fucking cute.
Even though the bar was packed and there was no possible way you would stick out in the crowd, you felt the heat of someone's gaze. You tried to be subtle and let your eyes drift around the room, taking in the groups of people laughing and dancing, but you couldn't pinpoint anybody you recognized. You shrugged off the feeling, chalking it up to paranoia because of your less than conservative attire, and turned your attention back to your roommate when you heard your name.
"This is Tommy!" she shouted with a huge smile across her face. You looked behind the bar to find a handsome man with longer, dark hair and a smattering of facial hair giving you a grin. You held out your hand so he could shake it, drinking in his warm, brown eyes and trying to keep yourself from staring at his exposed biceps underneath his white wifebeater. Maria was right: he was really fucking cute.
"So nice to finally meet you!" you yelled, and Tommy nodded.
"Pleasure's all mine!" he said loudly, handing each of you a glass of something questionable. You looked at Maria and scrunched your nose, wondering what on earth she ordered for you, and she giggled.
"Where's Joel?" she asked him, and for a second you forgot you were potentially being set up on a blind date with Tommy's brother. The nerves began to creep up your spine again so you took a long sip from your straw, wincing slightly when you realized just how strong the drink was.
Tommy opened his mouth to answer when his eyes locked onto someone over your shoulder and a small smirk tugged at his lips before he jutted his chin over your shoulder.
You both turned around, only to be met with one of the most handsome men you had ever seen. He was tall with broad shoulders and dark hair, just like his brother, but shorter in length. His eyes were the same - warm and deep and welcoming as he stared down at you. Only at you. And you found yourself swallowing nervously.
He was very close. Just inches away. He had to be, considering the amount of people in the bar, but it still sent your heart into a frenzy inside your chest. Hoping to gain a little more courage, you took another sip before smiling up at him and extending your hand while offering your name, completely forgetting about Maria next to you.
"Good to meet you," he murmured, his voice a deep, southern drawl. And even though the live band was tuning up loudly somewhere behind him, you still caught what he said. You could feel the heat creeping up your neck so you glanced over at Maria nervously, looking to deflect some of his attention. She seemed to pick up on your need for a lifeline so she greeted him and pulled him into a quick hug, finally dragging his gaze off you and allowing you a moment to breathe. You heard Tommy say something over your shoulder and Joel's eyes met his, then with a twitch at the corner of his mouth, leaned forward to take the beer from his brother's hand.
You didn't mean to but he was practically leaning over you and you couldn't help it. You inhaled deeply and tried to keep your thighs from rubbing together when you took in the heady, masculine scent of his sweat combined with whatever ocean breeze-type soap he used. Fuck, he smelled so good, and that was when you knew you were in trouble. You hadn't had a date in so long, let alone had sex, and combined with the incredibly strong drink Tommy poured, you were beginning to feel yourself loosen up. You gazed back up at him, your eyelashes involuntarily fluttering as you admired his patchy facial hair and suddenly you were desperate to know what it felt like. He caught you staring and smirked, giving you a playful wink before politely looking back towards Maria.
She seemed to notice your reaction to Joel but she didn't tease you. She knew it was difficult enough to get you to come out with her on nights like these so she didn't want to push it. Instead, she glanced over at Tommy and gave him a knowing glance as he took care of a group of customers next to you before turning back to the pair of you.
"Do you guys wanna go sit down?" Maria shouted, pulling your attention off each other and onto her. You nodded and allowed her to lead the way. You tried not to focus too much on Joel's hand delicately placed over your lower back, but it was hard. His touch was featherlight but somehow still electrifying. She found a high top table with two stools and snagged it while Joel stood between you both, resting his beer on the sticky tabletop.
"So glad you could make it tonight!" Maria said to Joel, and he nodded before taking a quick swig from his bottle. "Tommy said you had a late shoot."
"A shoot?" you repeated, tilting your head to the side. He caught your eye and suddenly you felt like the only person in the room again. "Are you a photographer or something?"
You might have noticed Maria stifle a giggle in her palm had you not been so enamored with his eyes. God, he was so fucking handsome, you couldn't look away. He gave you a small smile and shook his head.
"No, I'm an... actor," he said, his eyes flicking to Maria for a split second before looking back to you.
"Oh! How exciting! I love movies. Have I seen you in anything?"
Maria choked on her drink and you both looked at her, your brow furrowing with concern. "Are you okay?" you asked, reaching over to lightly pat on her upper back, but she held up her hand, waving you off.
"Sorry, went down the wrong pipe," she said, her eyes flickering between you both for a moment.
"Depends on what you're into," Joel replied, eyeing you closely. But before you could respond, Maria piped up.
"She's into super old movies. All the black and white shit. I'm sure she's never seen your stuff," she said with emphasis, and maybe had Tommy's drink not been so strong, you would have noticed the look she gave him.
"That's not all I'm into. I'm just going through a phase," you told him with a laugh.
He turned to you with a flirtatious grin. "I love the classics, too," he told you, and you felt yourself light up.
"Really?"
He chuckled and took another sip from his bottle of beer. "Yeah. Casablanca. Some Like It Hot. It Happened One Night. Breakfast at Tiffany's - god, I love Audrey," he told you with a little shake of his head.
"Me, too!" you exclaimed. "She's just so timeless and graceful. I think I've seen everything she's ever been in."
"Hey, I'm gonna go to the bathroom, I'll be right back, okay?" Maria interrupted, and you gave her a quick wave, letting her know it was fine. She slid down from her chair and took her drink with her. That should have been the first clue she wasn't planning on coming back.
You weren't sure how much time had passed, but it was enough for the band to have to announce they were taking a break. You had been so caught up in hearing about Joel's acting jobs, although they were mostly meager, guest starring roles on various, well-known drama shows, you had hardly noticed how much time had passed.
"So what are you working on now?" you asked, and he chuckled before draining what was left of his beer.
"Enough 'bout me. What 'bout you? What d'you do?"
"Me?" you squeaked, almost wanting to laugh. What you did was nothing compared to acting. It didn't even feel worthy to talk about it. But you did, anyway, because it was the polite thing to do. "I work at a law firm with Maria." When his eyebrows shot up in surprise, you giggled and shook your head. "I'm not a lawyer. I work for lawyers. I'm a legal assistant. I just help lawyers with the boring, administrative stuff. Gather paperwork, get signatures, make copies. Stuff like that."
"Sounds pretty interesting," Joel replied, and you knew he was just being nice.
"It's not, really. But it pays the bills and that's all that matters," you told him.
"We all do what we gotta do to make ends meet, right?" he said, and you hummed in agreement. Your gaze drifted over his shoulders where the fabric of his shirt was pulled tight before allowing yourself to let your eyes linger on the little exposed bit of tanned chest he displayed underneath his button down shirt. He caught you looking and chuckled before leaning forward.
He pinched your chin between his fingers and suddenly all you could focus on was his mouth. His perfect, soft, pouty mouth. You inched forward, testing the waters a bit before wrapping your hand gently around his wrist. His breath hitched in his throat as his eyes flicked between yours and your lips, eagerly waiting for your next move.
You leaned forward, meeting him more than halfway, and he wasted no time in capturing your mouth with his. If the bar wasn't so loud, you would have heard the small groan that spilled out, a sound you would have eagerly committed to memory, but unfortunately all you could do was feel it. Feel the vibrations from his lips, the sensation tingling against your sensitive skin, making you come alive. His fingers pressed into your chin firmly, keeping you still as his lips massaged yours tenderly, the heavenly taste of his beer and a faint hint of mint invading your senses. The way he kissed you, like you were the only person in the entire world, like you were all alone and not surrounded by a huge crowd of people, made your toes curl and a tingle shoot down your spine. If he was this good of a kisser, you were dying to know how he was in bed.
"You're so fuckin' pretty, y'know that?" he said lowly when he pulled away, his nose gently bumping against yours, causing your skin to prickle. Your cheeks flared from the compliment and you tried to hide your disappointment when his hand fell from your chin.
"Thank you," you replied breathlessly, dropping your gaze to the table as you fought the shy smile that kept trying to tug across your face.
"I usually don't like when Tommy tries to set me up with someone but goddamn, glad I went for it today," he said, watching happily as you squirmed in your seat and bit your lip. "Can I get your number? I'd love to see more of you. Go to dinner or a movie," he told you, pulling out his phone. And you weren't sure what came over you in that moment but you blurted out something incredibly uncharacteristic.
"Why don't we go back to my place and you can see more of me right now?"
His eyes widened in surprise for a split second before his face broke out into a huge grin.
"Yeah. Hell yeah," he replied, sliding down from the chair and holding his hand out to steady you and then he frowned. "You sure you didn't drink too much? I don't -"
"I'm fine," you told him honestly. You were a little tipsy, but you knew what you were doing. The drink was just enough to give you a bit of liquid courage.
You glanced around the bar, searching the packed room for Maria but it was impossible to find her. With one hand still engulfed in his, you pulled out your phone with the other and tapped out a quick text, letting her know you were safe and leaving.
"All good?" he asked, watching you type furiously. You finished up and nodded at him, getting lost in his eyes for a brief moment before squeezing his hand. He lead you towards the front, tucking you into his side as he navigated the crowd with ease.
When you finally made it outside, the cool air caressing your hot skin, you gasped and shivered. Joel took that as a sign to pull you closer, his large hand running up and down your arm as he tried to warm you up and it took everything in you not to drag him down the nearest alley and let him have you right there. You had no idea what had come over you, but something about him was making you feel so damn needy. Even as he drove, after you had given him directions back to your apartment, you couldn't help but notice how confidently he handled himself. He didn't appear to be nervous or overly excited or pushy. He was perfectly relaxed and you had to wonder if maybe he has taken his fair share of women home from the bar in the past and that was what made him so comfortable, but in that moment you couldn't care less. It had been so long since anybody had managed to catch your eye the way he had.
And you just really wanted him.
"You won't hurt my feelings if you changed your mind," he said as he followed you up to your shared apartment, the second floor of a duplex. "I don't want you doin' somethin' you'll regret tomorrow."
You paused outside your door, your key hovering above the lock as you looked at him leaning up against the frame.
"I didn't change my mind... did you?"
He quickly shook his head and pushed himself off the wall. "No, not at all," he murmured, closing the gap between you as he cupped your jaw with both hands. He searched your eyes for a minute while his thumbs gently smoothed over your cheeks. "Just don't wanna fuck this up," he added, his eyes flicking down to your lips.
"You won't," you assured him, leaning into his touch. And just as he was about to bend down for another kiss, you heard shuffling down below, your downstairs neighbor jiggling his doorknob, about to exit. You quickly turned around and jammed your key in the lock, allowing you both to stumble inside, stifling your laughter as you shut the door behind you.
He was on you in a flash. His body caged you in against the door, pressing up against you as he dipped down to capture your lips in a heated kiss. You wrapped your arms around his neck and held him close, your tongue begging to explore his mouth while his hands bunched up the thin fabric of your dress. He only gave you a little taste of his mouth before pulling away unexpectedly.
"Where's your room?" he asked breathlessly.
"Back there," you said, pointing down the hall behind him.
He tugged you against his chest, his mouth crashing down on yours as his hands palmed the backs of your thighs, yanking you off the ground and wrapping your legs around his waist. You grabbed onto his shoulders in surprise as he walked you both blindly down your hall. You had to reach out a hand and stop him from entering Maria's room with a giggle.
"Oops," he whispered with a smirk before slotting your lips together again and kicking your door open. Once you were in the privacy of your bedroom, he set you down slowly, his tongue still licking feverishly inside your mouth while his hands dragged up your legs and over your ass, lifting your dress up around your waist in the process. "Fuck, you're so pretty," he mumbled after breaking away to catch his breath. His eyes, darkened with desire, raked up and down, greedily taking in your disheveled appearance. He gave your ass a little squeeze and you fell against his chest in surprise, leaving you face to face with the small patch of tanned skin that he teased you with all night. You felt him shudder when you pressed a wet kiss against the spot, his reaction sparking something inside you. Something that gave you more confidence to continue. You hastily began to undo the buttons on his shirt, exposing more and more of his smooth, broad chest, your lips leaving a trail of kisses as you worked.
"I really like you," he said, his voice a little strained once you opened his shirt all the way and shoved it over his shoulders.
"I like you, too," you mumbled into his skin while you dragged your mouth across his chest. He gave your ass another firm squeeze and you moaned. There was something so intoxicating about him, it was driving you wild and you were desperate for more. "I swear, I don't usually do this," you said, laughing softly at the cliché as you pulled away slightly, just enough to work on the zipper of your dress. He grinned and watched you hungrily as you stripped down to your bra and panties while his fingers nimbly unbuckled his belt.
"It's alright if y'do. I'm not judgin'," he said, letting his jeans fall to the floor and stepping out. You laughed and shook your head before closing the distance between you once again.
"No, seriously. It's been... a while," you admitted, feeling your cheeks flush with embarrassment as you absentmindedly fiddled with the curls at the nape of his neck. He hummed and slid his massive hands over your stomach before finding a home on your hips.
"How long?"
You scrunched up your nose and averted your gaze, almost too embarrassed to answer but his fingers pinched your chin and dragged your eyes back up to meet his soft, dark brown, beautiful fucking eyes and you found the courage to reply.
"A year?" you squeaked, and he tutted under his breath, looking disappointed. He released your chin and gripped your hip once again, pressing you against him and when you felt his hardening length through his boxers, you gasped. "Okay, maybe a little longer than a year," you admitted when you began to realize how big he was. He chuckled and pressed his lips tenderly against your neck.
"S'okay. I'll take good care of you," he mumbled against your skin, making your knees weak. "Y'want that? Want me to make you feel good, baby?"
"Mhm," you whined, letting him lower you onto your mattress while he nipped and sucked at your neck. You slid your eyes shut with a sigh, your fingers raking through his thick curls as Joel got comfortable between your legs, pushing them apart with his thighs. His lips found yours again, his tongue eagerly sliding into your waiting mouth with a deep groan. His thumb and index finger gripped your jaw, gently prying it open to give him better access while your hands roamed over his smooth, strong back, loving the way his muscles twitched under your touch.
He could feel you squirming underneath him, your hips unconsciously rocking forward, seeking friction against the ache between your legs. His hand left your jaw and slid down your front, between your breasts and over your stomach until he felt the fabric of your black panties under his fingertips. He cupped your mound over your underwear, earning him another sweet moan from your lips when his fingers pressed against your clothed clit.
"So wet f'me already," he murmured against your mouth, his lips barely giving you a chance to breathe. "Can feel it through these little panties," he added, dragging his thumb harder over your seam, making you flinch. "Can I feel you? Hm?" he whispered as he nipped at your jaw, his thumb still sliding over your entrance while you gasped for air underneath him. You nodded your head vigorously and softly said yes. Without wasting another second, he hooked his finger into the band of your underwear and pulled them down, shifting to your side so he could take them all the way off but his lips never once left the underside of your jaw. His teeth nipped and grazed a little red trail of love bites as he settled himself between your legs once again and you frantically arched your back and pulled at the clasp of your bra. He smirked against your skin and helped you slide the offensive material down your arms and then pulled his head back so he could admire your bare chest. You heard him take a sharp breath in right before he palmed one of your breasts and pulled your nipple into his mouth, and for the second time you arched your back, pushing yourself into him. He grazed his teeth gently over your nipple, alternating between sucking and biting at them both, sending bolts of pleasure through your stomach and down to your toes.
"Think I can make you come just like this?" he asked, nipping at your sensitive skin and marveling at how your nipples tightened. You whimpered and writhed under him, the heat pooling low in your belly and making you flush. You couldn't possibly answer. He had you like putty in his hands, completely at his mercy, and there was absolutely nothing you could do about it. And just when you thought the answer would be yes, yes, I'm gonna come, he pulled away, leaving you a breathless and whiny mess between his arms.
You were moments away from getting on your knees and begging him to continue, to touch you, to kiss you, to please don't stop, don't ever stop when he hoisted himself onto his knees and tugged his boxers down.
Your eyes bugged out of your head when you saw him for the first time. He was huge. Bigger than you've ever had and it wasn't even close. You pushed yourself up so you were leaning on your elbows as you gawked at his angry looking cock bobbing between his legs. He lazily slid his hand up and down his shaft as he watched you, waiting for you to react. And once you found your voice, you certainly did.
"I-I can't," you stammered, unable to look away. "That won't - Jesus Christ, Joel - it'll never fit."
"Yes, it will," he assured you, letting go of his cock and leaning forward to capture your swollen lips again, but the image was burned into your brain and fear began to course through your veins. You turned your head, breaking the kiss and looking back down at his intimidating member resting between both of you.
You shook your head, your eyes wide when you finally looked at him again. "It's gonna hurt, Joel, I d-don't think... fuck!" you groaned, falling flat on your back and rubbing your face in frustration.
"Hey, it's alright," he cooed, pulling your hands away from your face so he could look at you. "If you don't wanna do this, we won't. But if you do, I promise I'll make it feel good," he said, pressing a soft kiss against your lips. "I'll get you nice 'n ready," he added, giving you another kiss, "get you so wet you'll be beggin' for it," he assured you, cupping your cheek and kissing you deep and slow, his tongue sliding against yours gently, trying to prove it to you.
"Are you sure?" you whispered, and he nodded, his nose nudging against yours.
"No pressure, baby. We don't gotta do this, I understand. It's not my first rodeo," he said with a grin, hoping to lighten the mood, and when you gave him a nervous smile, he felt some relief.
You chewed on your bottom lip for a moment before deciding. You nodded up at him and a wide smile spread across his face before he latched onto your lips again. You figured at this point in his life, he must know how to make a woman feel good. You were certainly not the first person to be intimidated by his size. And if it did hurt, you would simply tell him to stop and that would be that.
But something told you you wouldn't need to tell him to stop. Not the way he touched you and kissed you. He was experienced. He knew what he was doing, that much was clear because before you knew it, you were right back where you left off, his mouth leaving love bites across your chest as his hand dipped lower, past your hip until he found the wet heat between your thighs with a low groan and you felt yourself clench.
"Touch me," you whispered in his ear while your fingernails skittered across his shoulders. His fingers slipped through your folds and you heard him inhale sharply before the pad of his middle finger prodded at your entrance.
"You got a soft pussy, baby, fuck," he murmured as his breath hitched. "So fuckin' soft. Like silk, so fuckin' perfect," he rambled, making you preen from his praise. He dipped a finger inside and it slid in with ease, so he added another. You bit down on your lip and moaned when he curled his fingers, tickling a spot inside you that made you see stars.
"Joel," you whined as he pumped his fingers in and out, hooking them just right each time. He went back to lavishing attention on your breasts, this time pulling at your nipples with a little more aggression, trapping them and letting them slide out between his teeth when he pulled away, each time causing you to gasp. And just when you thought you were close to the edge once again, he pulled his fingers out and sat back on his heels.
You laid under him, panting for air as you tossed your head back and forth, your body hot and thrumming with need. He smirked down at you, knowing he had you exactly where he wanted you. You watched with heavy lidded eyes as he sucked his two fingers into his mouth with a moan, his eyes fluttering closed.
"More," you whispered, your brows furrowed as you tried to still your hips from bucking up towards him. His eyes opened and he cocked his head to the side.
"Beggin' already?"
You nodded and spread your legs wider, trying to entice him. His eyes fell to the center of your legs and you watched him swallow roughly as he saw you flutter and clench around nothing, just aching for some attention.
"Don't think you're ready yet, darlin'," he said, shimmying down the bed. "Think I need to taste you, first. You want that? You want me to lick your pretty pussy, baby?"
Your eyes squeezed shut as his words washed over you. You either were extremely desperate or you never should have doubted him in the first place because you could feel the arousal dripping out of you and you were certain that had never happened with anyone before. All you could do was nod your head, hoping that would be enough, and fortunately, it was.
"Oh, fuck!" you cried out when his hot tongue slid through your folds, getting a quick taste before going back for more. You grabbed at your breasts and flicked your nipples with your thumb while he sucked messily at your cunt, his nose getting buried in your slick and nudging against your clit.
"So soft 'n sweet," he whispered again as if he couldn't believe it. "Like velvet or somethin', my god, baby, I might never leave," he only half joked before diving back in and lapping up your arousal. You arched your back at the praise, your body desperate for release, but his hands around your thighs kept you from moving too much. Your skin was coated with sweat as your climax built up steadily under his expert tongue, and the way he had you struggling to breathe made you briefly wonder if you would pass out.
"Ohmygod, you're so good at that," you managed to whimper while he licked and moaned into you, but when his lips finally latched onto your neglected clit, you instantly saw stars. His tongue slid around your bundle of nerves while he pressed his face against you as hard as he could, allowing his facial hair to rub over your highly sensitive skin, causing tears to form at the corners of your eyes.
"Joel," you gasped, your hands falling to get lost in his hair. You rocked your hips gently against his face, matching his rhythm. "Fuck, Joel, I'm gonna come," you moaned, your eyes squeezing shut as you focused on your impending orgasm. He didn't reply. He just kept up his devastating pace, his fingers digging into the soft flesh of your thighs, trapping you against him but when you finally let go, yelling out something incoherent, you heard a deep, satisfied groan rumble in his chest, the sound making it seem like he may have somehow enjoyed it more than you.
His tongue abandoned your swollen clit in favor of greedily scooping up your release, giving you slow, deep licks until your legs began to shake and you whimpered at him weakly that it was too much, too much. He pulled his face away and you shivered when the cool air from your bedroom washed over your soaked center.
"Sorry, baby. Mighta gotten a little carried away," he said, his voice sounding hoarse as he wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. You cracked open your eyes to look at him, your body loose and pliant and spread out and wrecked, all because of him.
"You're really good at that," you whispered again, your voice cracking a bit, and he grinned.
"It's easy when you taste so fuckin' good," he replied, dragging the pad of his thumb across his lower lip and sucking it between his lips. You bit back a moan as you watched him and you realized you never felt this desired in your entire life. Never had anyone made you feel this good and lavished you with such praise and you were quickly becoming addicted to it.
You wanted more.
You needed more.
Your eyes flickered down to his cock, standing at attention between you, looking a little less intimidating than before. You bit down on your lip and he noticed, quirking an eyebrow at you as his hands slid up and down your smooth legs.
"I want it," you whispered, dragging your eyes back up to him. He chuckled and leaned forward, pressing his lips tenderly against yours and giving you a taste of yourself.
"You sure?"
You nodded eagerly and nibbled playfully at his chin before he reached down over the bed and grabbed his jeans. You frowned at first until he pulled out his wallet where he plucked a square foil wrapper from the folds and tossed everything else back onto the floor. Your heart began to beat faster as you watched him roll the condom over his massive length, your nerves beginning to creep back up once again but you did your best to push them out of your head. He must have picked up on your nervousness, or maybe he was just used to it from other women because he gently massaged your thighs and hips, trying to help you relax as he peppered kisses up your soft stomach before reaching your lips.
"I'll go slow," he murmured against your mouth, and you nodded. "Tell me if it hurts or y'wanna stop, alright?" and again, you nodded. You felt the thick tip of his cock notch at your opening and you instantly tensed up but he didn't say anything. He didn't make a move to try to enter you. He just let himself rest there, allowing you a chance to relax again while he kissed you long and deep, his tongue swirling slowly around yours and stealing all the breath from your lungs. When your knees fell from his waist, opening up your hips and relaxing your lower half, he pressed forward gently, feeding you his cock inch by inch, slowly and steadily, his mouth never leaving yours. When he was about halfway he heard you whimper and he stopped. He lifted his head and pressed a sweet kiss against the tip of your nose.
"Doin' okay?"
You nodded but your brows were furrowed in concentration and your chest was rising and falling faster and faster. He kissed the corner of your mouth and patiently waited for your body to relax again. Your palms glided up and down his shoulders as you squirmed a little bit underneath him, trying to find a more comfortable position before nodding, encouraging him to continue. He pressed forward once again, slowly and carefully while he whispered in your ear "you got the softest pussy, baby. Y'feel so good, so tight 'n warm. Such a pretty girl, love the way you feel."
You swallowed and tipped your head back, the praise going straight between your legs. There was something so hot about the way he complimented you, it was unlike anything you had ever experienced before. And when he finally bottomed out, your body feeling like it was stretching to its max to accommodate him, he continued to lavish you with praise. "Such a good girl, takin' all of me, look at that. Told you you could do it. Feel good, baby? Feel nice 'n full of my cock?"
"Yeah," you whined, your eyebrows pinching together at the sensation of his thick and heavy length resting inside you. Your jaw dropped as he dragged himself out and slowly eased back inside. His mouth hovered over yours as he watched your face, looking for any sign of discomfort. As he pushed in deeper, you exhaled shakily, your breath fanning over his face and making him shudder. "Yeah, that's it," he whispered when you let out a little moan, the first sign you were beginning to relax enough to enjoy it. Your fingers dug into his shoulders now, grounding you to him as he began to move a little faster.
He started to pant for air, his mind going fuzzy as he watched you slowly come apart under him again. He was hypnotized by the way your body welcomed him, stretched and pulled him in so perfectly. He had figured by now, he had experienced it all, but he was wrong. He was very, very wrong. No, he definitely had never fucked anyone like this. It almost didn't feel right to call it fucking. Not while you moaned so sweetly under him and kissed his neck and chest so tenderly. Not while he felt his heart flutter when you gazed up at him with your perfect, swollen lips and your eyes dark and heavy with desire. No, this wasn't just fucking. It felt like something else.
His mouth crashed down on yours once again, his tongue darting feverishly past your lips while his hand cupped your face and he rocked his hips into you, swallowing down every little noise you gifted him. He never wanted it to end. It felt too good, it felt so fucking good. He had no idea sex could feel like this. It was always so transactional for him, a means to an end, but now he felt something shift.
"S-so big," you choked out, his cock reaching a spot deep inside you had no idea existed. Your eyes watered and you whined into his neck as his hips ground into yours, his trimmed pubic hair rubbing deliciously against your clit, making your legs shake.
"I know, baby, I know," he murmured into your hair, his hand gripping your hip tightly, holding you flush against him as he worked to unravel you. "Doin' so good. Thought you couldn't do it 'n now look at you. Fuckin' perfect, goddamn. Most perfect pussy I've ever seen."
He felt you clench around him from the praise and he smirked.
"Y'like that? Like hearin' how good you make me feel?" he panted into your ear as he felt himself nearing the edge. He had to resist the urge to slam his hips into you recklessly like he was used to doing. He had to go slow. He had to make you feel good.
He felt your fingernails dig into his shoulders and he moaned, the little flash of pain igniting something deep in his belly. You heard your bedframe begin to squeak but even if it collapsed right then and there, you wouldn't care. You were so close, it was all you could focus on. It was all you wanted. Just for Joel to keep hitting that spot deep inside you while his coarse hair grazed your clit. Combined with his mouth leaving sloppy kisses all over your jaw and his massive hand digging into your hip, the sensation of being completely consumed by him sent you over the edge once again.
You hardly had time to warn him before you cried out his name and two tears trickled down your cheeks. Your vision was blurry from unshed tears and your skin felt like it was on fire as your orgasm ripped through you. You barely registered his praise, your mind a muddled mess. When he picked up the pace, just a tiny bit, it was enough to send you careening head first into another orgasm. Although it was smaller and less intense, you still felt all your limbs give out as your heart slammed wildly in your chest.
"Oh, fuck, there you go," he mumbled, heat licking up his spine as he fought to stay present. "Good girl. Comin' on my cock like that. Look at you, hm? God, y'feel so good," he nipped at your earlobe as he hitched your knee up a fraction, changing the angle ever so slightly and eliciting a small gasp from your throat while you tried to recover. You managed to tilt your head to the side and latch your lips onto his, muffling his deep groans as he chased his high while still doing his best to be careful. He whispered your name against your lips, his voice wavering as a white hot heat shot through his entire body.
"Ah! Ah! Oh, fuck, that's it," he moaned brokenly as his body stilled and he emptied himself into the condom, wishing more than ever that he could pull out and watch his release drip out of you. He collapsed into your shoulder, fighting for air and trying to gather himself. He was trying to remember if he ever had an orgasm that intense before, especially after just finishing a shoot a handful of hours ago, but he was coming up empty.
"You're incredible," he mumbled, pressing a chaste kiss against your collarbone. You hummed sleepily and gently raked your fingers through his hair, scraping your nails lightly against his scalp and making him shiver. He lifted his hips and began to withdraw, causing you to stir and tense underneath him. "Shh, it's okay," he whispered, then pulled all the way out with a grunt. You instinctively pulled your knees up to your chest but he held them open so he could look at the mess between your legs. "Even prettier now," he told you, and you felt your cheeks flare with heat. He smirked before standing up and grabbing his jeans from the floor.
"Bathroom?"
"Other side of the hall," you said, watching as he opened your door and strolled down the hall naked, his jeans still clutched in his fist and you prayed Maria hadn't come home because she would get the surprise of her life otherwise. You rolled onto your back and yanked your sheets over your bare body, your combined sweat drying on your skin and making you cold, as you stared up at the ceiling. You had no idea what had gotten into you, but whatever it was, you were really fucking glad. Joel, a relative stranger, just gave you the best sex of your life, there was no question. Multiple orgasms aside, you felt something different with him. You knew it was weird to think you felt a connection with someone you just met, but there was something definitely there between you.
When Joel walked back into your room, you rolled onto your side and gave him a shy smile. He had slipped his jeans on but left them unbuttoned as he gathered the rest of his clothes before sitting on the edge of your bed.
"You can stay," you said abruptly, and he turned his head to look at you in surprise. "I mean, only if you want to. You don't have to-"
"Yeah," he said, cutting you off and tossing his clothes on an armchair in the corner of your room. "Yeah, 'course I wanna stay. Didn't wanna assume or nothin'," he told you with a little pink dusting his cheeks and if you didn't know any better, he almost looked slightly embarrassed. You scooted over to make room as he slid his jeans back off, and even though his cock had softened by now, it still startled you. You stared at it before blinking and forcing yourself to look away, having a hard time believing he fit that inside your body.
When he settled under your blankets, he rolled onto his side to face you, his fingers pinching your chin as he looked at you. "I wanna see you again," he said, and you felt a huge smile stretch across your face.
"I'd like that," you replied, and the corners of his mouth twitched into a matching smile.
"Good," he said softly, slotting your lips together and breathing in deep.
You couldn't be sure how long you stayed like that; each of you wrapped in the other's arms, swollen lips peppering kisses against swollen lips, but you both had drifted off at some point because when you woke the next morning, the sun beaming brightly in through your windows, you were curled up against his chest with his nose was buried in your hair.
You closed your eyes and tried to fall back asleep, but the incessant noise from the kitchen made it impossible. Gently and carefully, you rolled out of Joel's loose grip, allowing yourself just a few brief seconds to admire how devastatingly handsome he was in the light of day before finding your pajamas and snatching your robe off the back of your door, wrapping it tightly around your neck, hoping to hide the marks Joel left on you. You gave him one last look, his plush lips parted ever so slightly as he continued to snore softly, before sneaking out into the hall and tiptoeing into the kitchen.
"Why are you up so early?" you yawned, locking eyes with Maria, who was gleefully dancing around the kitchen making breakfast. "How do you never get hungover?"
She shrugged and grinned. "Lots of water before bed," she replied, "would you eat pancakes if I make some?" You slumped down in a chair at your kitchen table and winced at the soreness between your legs before you shot her a smile.
"Oh god, yes," you groaned immediately, then your mind drifted to Joel. "But, um... is there enough for three?"
She froze, her hand hovering in the air over a mixing bowl, looking at you like you had just told her the sky was red. "Excuse me?" You felt your neck flush with heat and you dropped your gaze to your hands. "You failed to mention in your text that you were leaving last night with someone - oh my god! Is it Joel?!"
Her eyes went wide and you shushed her with a finger to your lips. "Yes, it's Joel. Don't embarrass me," you warned, but she looked like she had just seen a ghost. "What's wrong? I thought you wanted us to get to know each other."
"Yeah, 'get to know each other'. I didn't expect you to sleep with him that fast," she said, lowering her voice as she continued to work. She chewed on her bottom lip, suddenly filling the room with a tense silence.
"Is there a problem?" you asked her, panic beginning to rise in your chest. "Oh god, don't tell me he's in a relationship or something. Maria, so fucking help me-"
"No! No, nothing like that," she said, quickly putting that worry to bed. She swiveled around to dig inside the fridge, ignoring your question. When she emerged, you raised an eyebrow at her, waiting for her to explain. Instead, her lips turned up into a playful smirk and she glanced at you. "How was he?"
You narrowed your eyes and shook your head. "Nuh uh. I'm not answering your questions if you aren't answering mine."
"Mornin'," a deep voice mumbled from behind you, making you both jump. Joel entered the kitchen in his clothes from the night before, scratching his beard as he yawned. His tired eyes landed on you and a lazy smile spread across his face before he leaned down and planted a gentle kiss against your lips. You could feel Maria's eyes on you both and it made the tips of your ears burn, but you tried to ignore it.
"Well, well, well," was all Maria said, turning back to the griddle to hide her smile.
"Can you stay for breakfast?" you asked when you realized it looked like he was getting ready to leave. His eyes softened and shook his head.
"Sorry, I got a work meeting in a couple hours," he told you, holding out his phone. "But you never did gimme your number," he said, quirking an eyebrow at you. You bit your lip shyly and took his phone, tapping your number in his contacts.
"Work meeting on a Sunday?" you questioned, and had you been paying attention, you would have seen the look Maria gave him before he answered.
"An audition."
"Oh! Sounds cool," you said, handing his phone back with a smile. "Good luck."
"Thanks, baby," he murmured, but Maria still heard it and noisily began to pull plates from the cupboard. He leaned down and gave you another quick kiss. "I'll call you later," he said, waving his phone in the air before tucking it into his pocket and heading towards the door. "Good to see you, Maria," he said over his shoulder, and she gave him a wave, suddenly too engrossed in cooking to do anything else. He winked at you quickly as he shut the door behind him and you had to hide your smile behind your fist when Maria turned around.
"Hungry?" she asked, setting down a plate in front of you. In fact, you were famished, but you weren't going to let her off that easy.
"So, what's the issue?" you asked around a mouthful of pancakes. She chewed thoughtfully, clearly buying as much time as possible before answering.
"No issue. It's just not like you to bring someone home like that," she said with a little shrug.
"Yeah, but there was a spark, y'know?" you said, and she nodded slowly. "He's really sweet, I think I like him," you told her with a grin.
"Yeah, I can see that," she teased before focusing on her pancakes. A few minutes passed before she spoke again. "Did he tell you anything about his job?"
You nodded as you scrolled on your phone. "Yeah. Just that he's been on some random TV shows and stuff."
"That's all?"
You looked up at her now and furrowed your brow. "What else would there be?" you asked slowly, but she shrugged it off.
"Nothing. You wanna go shopping later?"
Joel finally arrived back at his and Tommy's apartment just past dinner time. He kicked off his shoes and tossed his keys onto the messy table next to the door before glancing in the living room. He frowned when he didn't see his brother, expecting Tommy to be seated in his usual spot in front of the TV, so he made his way into the kitchen.
"There you are," Joel said, nodding to Tommy, who was seated at the kitchen table with an empty plate in front of him while he looked down at his phone. Joel opened the fridge and pulled out a beer. "Want one?"
"Yeah, sure," he replied, stretching out his arm to take it and twisting the cap off. Joel collapsed into the chair across from his brother with a huff and ran his fingers through his hair. "Long day?"
"Yeah," was all Joel said before taking a long swig of beer. He put the bottle back down on the table and frowned at Tommy when he realized he was being uncharacteristically quiet. "What's goin' on?"
Tommy sighed and rubbed his eyes. "Did you really fuck Maria's roommate last night?"
Joel chuckled before scratching his beard. "What can I say? You were right. We hit it off."
"C'mon, man. Don't fuck this up for me, I really like Maria," Tommy said, pushing himself up from the table to put his plate in the sink.
"How am I fuckin' it up?" Joel asked, growing slightly annoyed. "You wanted me to meet her. You said you wanted someone to go on double dates with 'n shit. What's the problem?"
"You didn't tell her 'bout your job, that's the goddamn problem!" Tommy said, snatching his beer off the table and marching into the living room. Joel rolled his eyes but picked up his own bottle to follow him.
"I thought you guys woulda told her. By the time I figured it out, it woulda been too awkward to say anythin'," Joel explained as he sat down on the other end of the couch and watched Tommy flip through the channels.
"Maria wanted to wait," Tommy admitted quietly, staring at the TV. "She thought she wouldn't come meet you if she knew beforehand. She wanted to give you guys a chance to get to know each other first. She didn't think you'd fuck her friend on the first goddamn night. What the hell's wrong with you? Didn't you just come from a job?" his brother snapped angrily.
Joel scratched the back of his head and sighed. "Did it ever occur to you that she was the one who asked me back to her place?" he replied, his eyebrows pinching together. "I just asked for her number so I could take her out sometime and next thing I know, we're back in her apartment-"
"Alright, spare me the details," Tommy muttered, taking a long sip from his beer. Joel twisted the bottle around in his lap, his fingernail picking at the label, lost in thought.
"You think she ain't gonna wanna see me anymore when I tell her the truth?" Joel asked softly, still staring down at the sticky paper piecing off his bottle. When Tommy took too long to answer, Joel finally dragged his eyes up to look at him.
"I don't know," he finally said, "Maria don't seem to think so."
Joel nodded solemnly and looked back down to his lap.
"Well, shit," he whispered, then brought the bottle to his lips to take a long drink. Tommy watched him curiously from the other end of the couch.
"You guys really hit it off?" he asked.
Joel nodded, his eyes still cast down. "Yeah. I think we got somethin' good between us. Wasn't just 'bout the sex. We, like... connected, or somethin'."
Tommy sighed and looked back at the TV. "Well, maybe Maria's wrong. Maybe she'll be okay with it."
Joel grimaced and stood up from the couch.
"I think I'm gonna go upstairs," he said, and Tommy frowned.
"Already? It's early and you didn't eat-"
"I had somethin' at work, I'm fine," he replied, grabbing another beer before heading up the stairs towards his bedroom.
His job was always a point of contention with women. The girls he tried dating in the past were usually disgusted with him, a few even slapped him across the face. And the ones who weren't revolted by his job were far too into the idea of fucking a pornstar. No matter which way he sliced it, he always ended up alone. He didn't blame them, he knew he had an unconventional job, but it did get to the point where he had stopped trying to pursue relationships. That is, until his brother convinced him to come meet you at his bar. Joel resisted, he dug in his heels and told Tommy he wasn't interested but only finally caved after his brother suggested hanging back and getting a look at you before deciding. So he did just that. He found a table and nursed a beer and waited for Maria and her mystery roommate to appear.
When he first saw you, it felt like time stood still. He had to blink a few times to make sure his eyes weren't playing tricks on him. You looked gorgeous in that little dress you had on, your pretty eyes darting around the crowds of people nervously as he watched you from a distance and suddenly he was angry Tommy hadn't offered to introduce you sooner.
He should have told you the truth before he slept with you but it had been so long since he'd had sex with anyone that didn't feel like they were just using him. And while he certainly didn't mind that when he was younger, he realized he craved a certain type of softness now, and when you offered yourself up to him on a silver platter, he didn't have the strength to say no.
Once he got back to his bedroom, sliding both beers onto his cluttered nightstand, he plopped onto his bed and pulled out his phone.
He stared at your contact card on the screen, his thumb hovering over your number. He should just do it. Rip it off, like a bandaid. So he dialed your number and ignored the way his heart fluttered anxiously in his chest as he waited for you to answer.
"Hello?"
Fuck, he couldn't do it. Not yet.
"Hey," he said, lying back onto his pillows with a stupid grin on his face. "How was the rest of your day?"
He thought he heard voices in the background and syndicated laughter before the noise faded and you were cloaked in silence. "It was alright. Went shopping with Maria, got lunch at this new Mexican place," you told him, and he could hear a little breathlessness in your tone. "How was your audition?"
He cringed and rubbed his eyes roughly. "Good. It was good," then later would come to regret adding, "thought 'bout you the whole time."
"Me?" you squeaked in surprise, "during an audition?"
"Yeah," he sighed, staring up blankly at the popcorn ceiling. "Just had such a great time with you. Thinkin' 'bout when I can see you again." He reached over to grab his nearly empty beer and chugged the rest.
"How about this weekend?" you offered, and even though it was the logical answer, he hated the idea of not seeing you again for almost a full week.
"That sounds great. Did you wanna go get a drink and see a movie? You said you're into the classics right now, yeah? There's a little theater I know showin' Breakfast at Tiffany's this Saturday." He knew he sounded too eager but he couldn't help himself.
"I'd love that," you gushed, and that stupid smile made yet another reappearance on his face. "I actually have My Fair Lady on right now."
"What channel?" he asked, reaching for his remote.
You giggled and told him while he flipped his TV to the correct station. When you heard the voices echoing through the phone, you grinned. "Are you watching it, too?"
"Yeah, told you I loved Audrey," he replied, settling in and twisting open his second beer.
"So, do you think you got it?" you asked after a few minutes of silence.
"Got what?"
"The part. Your audition today."
The guilt was simmering deep in his chest now. He should just tell you and get it over with, but he foolishly decided the least he could do was tell you face to face. He would do it next weekend.
"Yeah, maybe," he replied as he tried not to think of the screen test he had with a blonde girl ten years younger than him, half naked and on her knees with his cock stuffed in her mouth.
"You don't sound that enthused," you teased, and he smiled.
"Didn't wanna leave you today so I guess I didn't give it my all," he said truthfully.
He heard you gasp a little on the other end. "Oh, Joel, I would feel awful if you didn't get a part because of me. You shouldn't feel bad about leaving, I totally understand."
He smiled to himself, about to tell you how sweet you were when you excitedly cut him off. "Oh, it's my favorite part! She's about to come down the stairs for the garden party." Joel focused his attention back on his screen as watched as Audrey Hepburn gracefully descended the steps, wearing a stunning white dress adorned with pearls and her hair meticulously done up nearly a foot above her head.
Before either of you realized it, you had watched the rest of the movie together, mostly in silence but occasionally one of you piped up to mention something about a particular scene, or maybe laughed at something Eliza said. It felt so natural and easy and he didn't want to give it up.
So he didn't.
He found himself calling you again the following night, and the night after that. Each time one of you found a movie to watch, and they didn't have to be just the classics. One night you watched Die Hard together and another you picked Love Actually.
"Y'know, don't tell Tommy but I really like this one," he admitted as he settled in to watch Alan Rickman fuck up his entire life.
"Your secret's safe with me," you said with a giggle.
"How was work?" he asked you, only half listening to the TV. He much preferred to hear what you had to say, anyway.
You groaned through the phone and he cocked his head to the side.
"Not good, I take it?"
"No, not really," you admitted, "there's this new guy, Sam, who started and he is just such a pain in the ass. He's fresh out of law school and he thinks he knows everything and, I mean, I'm sure he's smart and all but the way he treats some of the girls... it's like he thinks he's Don Draper, you know?" you finished with a small laugh, but Joel didn't find it funny.
"Did he say or do somethin' to you?" he asked, his tone suddenly serious.
"Oh, no," you said quickly, and he felt his muscles relax. "Nothing like that. He's just the type of guy who thinks he's better than everyone else and bosses people around. It's really not a big deal. It happens a lot, you'd think I would be used to it by now."
He hummed in response but otherwise kept quiet. He didn't like what he was hearing, but he let it go. For now. Instead, you were both distracted by the next scene in the movie: two body doubles on the set of an adult film pretending to have sex while having a completely innocent conversation as the lighting crew and director instructed them on how to move around for the shot.
"God, that's gotta be so awkward," you said with a laugh, "I can't imagine doing something like that."
"Like what?" he asked without thinking, and he held his breath, waiting for your answer.
"Shooting porn. How do you just have sex with someone, walk away after and feel nothing?" You paused for a moment and realized what you were implying. "Shit... I mean, not trying to say that I have feelings for you, per se, but I guess I mean in a casual sense? Or something? Oh my god, please save me," you pleaded, and he couldn't help but laugh.
"It's alright, I know what you mean," he said, and he saw an opportunity to possibly change your mind on the whole idea. "But I bet it's easier than it sounds. It ain't all about affection and love, it's just a job. Some people can separate that kinda stuff better, I think."
"Yeah," you replied after a moment, and he could tell you weren't convinced. "Yeah, maybe. I guess."
You continued to watch the rest of the movie together, but in the back of Joel's mind he desperately hoped he could eventually somehow convince you to see past his job, how meaningless it all really was, and to give him a chance.
Saturday arrived before you knew it. It hardly felt like a first date with Joel after you've already had sex and talked on the phone every night that week, but you were still nervous, although you did find some peace of mind knowing there wouldn't be a shortage of things to talk about. That never seemed to be a problem with him. No silence was too long or awkward, and it was such a relief.
You met up at a bar two hours before the movie started to get a couple drinks. From the outside, the bar appeared to have a tropical island theme but when you entered, you realized it was more along the lines of a sports bar. There were four large screen TVs behind the bar and each one displaying a different sport with the closed captioning scrolling along the bottom, but it seemed to be a popular place to go because the place was already packed. One lone barstool remained unoccupied and Joel quickly snagged it and ushered you to sit down.
"Do you play any sports?" you asked him after you got your first round.
"Not anymore," he told you with a soft smile, his gaze dipping down to admire the sundress you picked to wear that night. "When I was younger I did a little bit of football, but it's a tough sport. Really takes it's toll, physically, y'know?"
You hummed and let your gaze drift to the screen playing college football. "Were you any good at it?"
He shrugged. "Not really. But it was a good way to meet girls," he said with a wink, and you giggled.
Why did you have to get along so well? It wasn't fair. He'd only known you for a week but it felt like a year. He thought by the time he saw you again he would know what to say. Like he would finally figure out the magical combination of words that would make you understand his job, but of course, he hadn't. All he could do was tell you the truth and hope for the best.
"Hey, uh, y'think we can take a walk before the movie?" he asked, unable to keep his voice from wavering, his beer doing very little to help his confidence.
"Yeah, of course," you said, sliding down from the barstool. Your hand slid between his as you allowed him to lead you out of the bar, the feeling of your hand in his making his chest ache. When you got outside, the warm Texas sun finally beginning to set and leaving the air a fraction less humid than when you had arrived, he still kept your hand held tightly within his own, afraid to let you go.
"I don't think I've ever been to this area before," you told him as you walked, "it's so cute, this was a great idea."
"Yeah, I didn't grow up too far from here," he explained, and you squinted as you looked up at him.
"Oh, really?"
He nodded and chewed on his bottom lip while he lead you towards a small park across the street from the movie theater. "Me 'n Tommy grew up 'bout ten minutes from here," he said, glancing at you before adding, "in a trailer park."
You just listened and nodded, still taking in your surroundings and smiling at some kids racing by the playground, seemingly unbothered by his less than glamorous childhood. He tugged your hand towards an empty park bench and you both sat down. You were about to tell him where you were from when he spoke up again, his eyes pinned to the ground. "We grew up poor. Didn't have much. It was hard," he began, and you watched him quietly. He rubbed anxiously at his beard, lost in thought. "Was never really good at anythin', never any good in school," he continued, his heart beginning to beat faster in his chest. He chanced a look in your direction. You were looking at him so sweetly, the setting sun highlighting your hair and perfect features as you patiently waited for him to finish talking and he suddenly realized he may never get to kiss you again after tonight. Without thinking, he leaned forward and kissed you, your lips slotting together perfectly, just the way he remembered. He felt you smile and he pulled back to look at you.
"What was that for?" you asked him playfully, but he just swallowed roughly and looked back down at the ground.
"I gotta tell you somethin'," he said, and the tone in his voice made you frown.
"Okay," you replied slowly.
"I tried to make it as an actor," he told you truthfully. "It's real fuckin' hard though, not sure if y'knew," he joked, making you smile a bit, but you knew he was about to tell you something serious. "Ah, fuck," he muttered, rubbing his eyes with shaky fingers.
"Joel, what are you trying to say?" you asked gently, rubbing his upper back.
"I made some... unusual career choices," he finally said, his fingers still pressed into his eyes.
"C'mon, it can't be that bad," you told him, trying to help him relax.
He figured he might as well just say it. So he did.
"I found work in the... adult film industry," he said, refusing to look at you as your hand froze on his back. "It wasn't my first choice, but it paid good at a time when I had nothin', and, well, it seemed to be the only thing I was ever any good at."
"Oh," you said softly, trying to wrap your head around what he just told you. "W-when did you do all this?" you finally managed to ask. His eyebrows pinched together for a moment before he realized you misunderstood.
"I still do it."
"Oh..." you said again, and this time your hand fell from his back as you began to connect the dots. "So when you said you said you had an audition?"
"Yeah," he admitted, sitting back and forcing himself to look at you. "It was a screen test for a movie."
"An adult movie," you clarified, and he nodded solemnly. Please, he thought, please understand.
"What does that... entail, exactly?" you asked, and he could already see the gears turning as you began to close yourself off. He turned toward you and rested his arm along the back of the bench, fingers itching to touch you.
"It varies. Depends on what the director wants, but it's a chemistry test between two actors so in this case it was, uh, oral," he said, his throat closing up when he saw the look in your eye.
"You had sex with me and the next day got a blowjob from someone else?" you asked, your voice a little pained, and he thought he saw tears welling up in your eyes but you blinked them away.
"It ain't like that," he insisted, inching closer to you. "There's no feelin's involved, it's just work. It don't mean anythin'-"
"How can it not mean anything?" you asked, your voice rising a bit.
"It just doesn't, I promise," he said, despair washing over him, "but when you and I had sex, that meant somethin'."
You stared down at your hands tangled in your lap as you struggled to process everything.
"Ask me anythin' you wanna know and I'll tell you," he said, desperately trying to convince you. You closed your eyes and shook your head.
"Why didn't you tell me before?"
Shit.
He sighed and looked away. "When we met, I thought you already knew, but when I figured out you didn't, I couldn't find the right way to say it. I didn't think we'd sleep together that night. It's no excuse, and I'm sorry, but I really like you. I really fuckin' like you, okay?" he said, the desperation rolling off him in waves.
"I like you, too," you replied, your voice so small as you continued to stare at your lap. "But I need some time to think."
He nodded. "I get it. Take all the time y'need." You murmured your thanks and chewed on your lower lip as you looked around the park. "Did'ya still wanna see the movie?" he asked, and you finally looked at him again. Your eyes softened a bit when you noticed his expression, his face filled anguish. He was still the man you had been getting to know all week. The same man who listened to you talk about work and movies and stories about college. But you couldn't ignore the hollow pain in your chest at the thought of sharing him with anybody else.
"Yeah," you said, and his eyes lit up. "If you want to, that is."
"'Course I wanna," he replied before standing up and reaching out for your hand. You stared at it a moment before slowly lifting up your arm and lacing your fingers together.
Throughout the entire movie, all you could think about was Joel and what it was like on those sets. He said he had a 'shoot' the day you first met. You now realized he must have just come from fucking somebody else before meeting you and taking you home. All evening, the thought made you sick. He could tell, too. Or, at least, he knew your mind was definitely not focused on the movie. As you walked to his truck, darkness blanketing the streets, he tried to engage you in conversation, just like he had all week. He tried to talk about the movie and your favorite parts, but you were miles away, only giving him brief, empty answers.
The drive back to your apartment was the first uncomfortable silence the two of you shared.
By the time he pulled into your driveway and he cut the engine, you had made up your mind.
"Joel."
He was just about to swing open his truck door but immediately stopped. "Yeah?"
You tried to subtly wipe a tear away from the corner of your eye, but he caught it. "I can't do this."
His eyes fluttered shut, his heart breaking as he took a deep breath.
"I understand," he told you softly, and then he heard you sniffle. He opened his eyes to find your head turned away from him, looking out the passenger window, trying to hide your face. "Trust me. It's happened before. It's... I get it," he said, his eyes dropping to his lap.
"It's not you," you tried to tell him, but he shook his head.
"You don't gotta explain-"
"I just know myself, Joel. I'm weak and insecure and jealous and in the end, I would just get hurt. I'm not judging you," you said, finally twisting your head back around to look at him. "Believe me, I'm not judging you. I'm just... not strong enough."
He nodded slowly as you stared at one another, each of you heartbroken.
"For the record, you ain't weak," he finally said, and the corner of your mouth twitched. "You're stronger than y'think. Don't sell yourself short, alright?"
You gave him a small smile and looked away.
"Would it sound too stupid and cliché if I wanted to stay friends?" you asked, and he chuckled.
"Not at all."
"'Cause I like you," you said, your gaze drifting back to his deep, brown eyes, "I really do. I like talking to you and hanging out with you. I don't want to lose that."
"Me, too," he told you, his eyes glistening in the moonlight. Just friends. Yeah, right, he thought, that never works out.
He was convinced he wouldn't ever see you again after that night. Maybe if he was lucky and Tommy didn't completely fuck things up with Maria, he might see you at the bar occasionally or maybe at a birthday party. But just four days after your first and last date, he was lying in bed, mindlessly flicking through the channels on his TV when his phone rang. He lazily picked it up then sat up straight when he saw your name lighting up the screen.
"Hello?" he answered, half expecting it to be a butt dial. But then he heard your voice.
"Charlie's Angels. Channel 37."
He grinned.
"Original or remake?"
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